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Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 25 (view)

Halloween costume ideas Posted: 10/31/2009 8:51:55 PM
Joe, what did you finally choose? Another girl at work decided to be Poison Ivy, so I was Cat Woman ala Eartha Kitt. It was a great costume and we all had a lot of fun with it.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 17 (view)

Everything-but-marriage law. Posted: 10/28/2009 7:21:23 AM
You know what I find really, really frightening? Some say they are against Ref. 71 because you believe gays should have rights. Uh, take a moment to crack open your voter's pamphlet. If you believe that the domestic partnership legislation that is ALREADY on the books to be a good thing, then you should be FOR Ref. 71, not against it.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 30 (view)

Pay for Rejection? Posted: 10/13/2009 8:46:37 PM
Isabella, sorry that didn't work for you. I guess I'm just getting all of the polite guys. ;-)

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 17 (view)

Goal-Oriented, Is it that Important to you? Posted: 10/10/2009 6:47:44 AM
As long as it's goal-oriented and not orientated! That sets my teeth on edge and I hit the back button quick. What the OP quoted sounds like pseudo-intellectual prattle. What's that have to do with goals? I got a fortune a few weeks ago that said my short-term goals were about to be fulfilled. I still can't think of what those were unless it was getting the laundry done or something. I guess I don't make goals. I just do stuff and don't think to make it a goal.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 35 (view)

Driving me nuts! Posted: 10/10/2009 6:39:09 AM
OP, it's almost like you were hoping we'd give you permission to cheat. You have a good thing that you don't want to give up, but you want to be sexually active, and can't or won't with her. It seems like a classic case of having your cake and eating it too. If you love her as much as you claim, then let her go. I'm sure there are plenty of men who would like to meet a woman who treats a man like a king.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 49 (view)

pre-nups Posted: 10/9/2009 8:42:43 PM
I figure at our advanced (ahem!) ages there are likely to be adult children, retirement accounts, insurance policies and other assets. Why not figure out how to divvy up all that at the end, whether it be death or dislike?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 43 (view)

pre-nups Posted: 10/9/2009 7:36:50 PM
Oh absolutely! Although I don't know if I'd marry again, this is a common law state and I think it's wise for both parties to have some kind of agreement in place if a long term commitment is planned.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 43 (view)

Men & woman of a certain size??? Posted: 10/8/2009 6:22:46 PM
Bella Nikki, even if most of what you say is true, I have to say, so what? Hon, the ones who are judging you on your weight without getting to know you are the ones missing out, not you. Fat people have SO's, and they get married and they are capable of being sexy and desirable. What you don't want to do is judge all men by the few who have posted negatively. There are plenty of men out there who are attracted to many facets of a woman, and if a plump body is part of that, then all the better for gal's like me. I take excellent care of myself and I'm still chubby. Oh well! I don't do so bad in the dating/boyfriend arena. Plenty of Fish is not the end all and be all of places to meet a man.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 88 (view)

She's Too Into You! Posted: 10/7/2009 5:36:51 PM
This leave's me questioning something. What do both men and women consider to be a fair time with there SOA. Also what do they consider to be a fair time together at different times during the relationship. Such as X many hours for the first month or 2, X many of hours for 2-4 months etc... That's just it. There is no set time or amount of contact that is the norm. The idea is to find someone who meshes with your desired levels.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 81 (view)

She's Too Into You! Posted: 10/7/2009 7:21:18 AM
I now seen someone who comes on so strong a real red flag. It's simply not normal or healthy. If you fall for it either you get someone who is very controlling or someone who likes to play games with your emotinons or someone who is too needy. I think both parties should maintain balance and give space. It's easy to get caught up especially if you haven't dated in a while. Just take it slow and that seems to be the best way to avoid problems. ^^^^^you really have a good grasp on this. I've been there too and have to remind myself not to get caught up in the rush of excitement when someone seems really into me. It feels great, the way eating a big piece of cake feels great right up until you feel kind of sick from all of the sugar. For all of the ones (he's and she's) who are too into you, there seem to be an equal number of hard-to-gets that may in fact inspire you to become needy when you meet someone you like. I think what it all boils down to is when you meet someone and you are both comfortable with the pace, then you're on to something. You won't have to worry about him calling too often or her wanting to spend every weekend together. It will just happen naturally.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 75 (view)

Which date left you laughing Posted: 10/6/2009 8:25:11 PM
Chatted online for a bit, his picture was very cute. We did a lunch meet and greet at a Thai place. I arrived and checked in with the hostess, who pointed to a man sitting at a nearby table. I smiled even though his appearance was markedly different than his photo. I could deal with the 10+ years and the 40+ pounds, but as I sat down, I had trouble looking him in the eye. He, for some unknown reason, had shaved off one eyebrow. I didn't know where to look and faked a stomach ache to leave before lunch. I burst out laughing as soon as I was in my car. As soon as I got home, I looked up his profile to make sure his picture included two eyebrows.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 58 (view)

False I.D. to Proove We're Younger?? Posted: 10/6/2009 6:58:04 PM
So because a whole herd of old men are lying, that makes it ok? I was being tongue-in-cheek. Sorry that didn't convey properly.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 56 (view)

False I.D. to Proove We're Younger?? Posted: 10/6/2009 4:55:05 PM
So because a whole herd of old men are lying, that makes it ok? I always hit the back button if I read the "younger than I look" or "pof messed up on my age" in a profile. How young someone looks is subjective. Let me decide thank you! The last guy I dated who lied about his age (that I know of) kept telling me I looked 32. That's so far off it isn't even flattering. Methinks he was trying to distract me from his ever-changing birthdate.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 17 (view)

False I.D. to Proove We're Younger?? Posted: 10/5/2009 5:20:15 AM
Well I've seen plenty of profiles of me who claim 50 and look 65, so why not?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 39 (view)

How far is too far for a relationship? Posted: 10/4/2009 3:04:30 PM
Isn't that the truth! I avoid them like the plague.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 27 (view)

What's so wrong with being honest? Posted: 10/4/2009 7:17:06 AM
I agree it would be a much better world if people posted recent and honest photos So says the one without a photo! Honesty, bad attitudes, etc. show themselves in time. Take that time to get to know someone so that all you lament later is having that one good date instead of feeling bad you got naked with someone who turns out to be a creep.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 26 (view)

Pay for Rejection? Posted: 10/4/2009 6:57:02 AM
Isabella, I think when you try to explain why you're rejecting, you leave the door open. A polite, but firm, "Thank you for writing, but I don't think we're a match" works for me every time.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 8 (view)

Undecided/open regarding kids Posted: 10/4/2009 6:53:11 AM
That reminds me; the last time this thread came up, a lot of people said they were afraid if they put "does not want children" that it would scare off anyone who already had children. Again, it's a matter of interpretation. I have it on mine because I am so done having kids! I am not opposed to dating someone with kids, although if they are very young, I'd most likely avoid that.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 5 (view)

Undecided/open regarding kids Posted: 10/3/2009 7:16:22 PM
Sheloki, "Rather Not Say" is also the default answer when you skip a question, so maybe your worries are for naught? Anyway, since it's important, I'd definitely bring it into the conversation before meeting.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 35 (view)

I can act like a man - You make me feel like a man Posted: 10/3/2009 7:09:08 AM
OP even if I don't actually know what you mean, how you say it is really beautiful. I don't ever "act" like a woman, I just am a woman and always feel that way too. I think maybe what you're describing is the flush of excitement when you really connect with someone. Perhaps your "feeling like a man" is just...feeling?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 55 (view)

Are you worried about family and friends knowing you are on this site? Posted: 10/2/2009 2:45:45 PM
Seems this thread was resurrected from the dead, we must 've run out of new ideas. I think it's a fantastic idea considering the last post on this topic was more than 3 years old. Perhaps perceptions have changed in recent years.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 30 (view)

A neuropsychologist takes on a driveby diagnosis Posted: 10/2/2009 2:42:15 PM
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Actually, he titled the thread "driveby diagnosis" not "driveby conversation." PET is a fascinating tool to be sure. I'm sorry your healthcare (I'm presuming that's what you mean by Canada) doesn't allow for that research tool.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 50 (view)

Are you worried about family and friends knowing you are on this site? Posted: 10/2/2009 7:15:04 AM
I haven't shared the link, but it's not a secret I meet all sorts of wonderful people via the internet. There's nothing in my profile or my forum posts I'd be embarrassed for someone to see. One of my coworker's mentioned once how often I seem to have lunch dates or after dinner drinks and I told her I meet men I've gotten to know here. She said, "Oh I could never do that." Too bad I guess; she's home with her dogs and I'm out meeting people and having fun.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 25 (view)

A neuropsychologist takes on a driveby diagnosis Posted: 10/2/2009 5:03:57 AM
It troubles me that your friend the neuropsychologist is willing to make a diagnosis without ever having met the woman. I work in the mental health field myself and as a rule, do not go around diagnosing people based on what others share with me. That is unless, you happened to have a copy of her MRI or PET handy and gave those to your friend?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 134 (view)

Dating a Gemini Posted: 10/2/2009 4:44:51 AM
Gemini's if you dated a Virgo how was the relationship? I married one, ha! He was depressed and moody, but put on a good face for the community. After a few years the cracks showed and he started falling apart. It had nothing to do with his sign, and everything to do with his illness. I don't fit the Gemini stereotype of flighty and unable to make a commitment. I'm pretty grounded and a deep thinker. I much prefer a quiet, intimate setting where I can be part of the background and not the center of attention. I read somewhere that Sagittarius and Pisces are astrological he11 for me, but not sure that's true. I've meet some very moody Pisces over the years, but I'm not convinced their sign had anything to do with it.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 60 (view)

Is it a good idea for a couple to tell each other how much money they make? Posted: 10/1/2009 8:25:00 PM
If you define "couple" as a pair who plan to live together or marry, then at some point a "state of the finances" should occur with talk about salaries and debts. I don't think it's necessary to share this information during dating. I actually had a guy fishing around for my salary while we were in the phone call stage of things and it was a turn off. I think these things become apparent as you get to know one another anyway.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 47 (view)

Another confused question Posted: 10/1/2009 12:29:25 PM
Now that there's resolution, will we have to read page upon page of advice and/or criticism of this guy? Or will a mod come along and close it for him?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 27 (view)

2 Second Dates Which Led to Nothing...Confused. Posted: 10/1/2009 12:27:21 PM
1. Cassago is a wise woman. 2. Unless the guy is a total creep on the first date, I always do a second date to see how we are without first date jitters. The difference is if I know there's not going to be a third date, I let the guy know. 3. Men who get turned down for sex often never call again. Why should it be different for women?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 53 (view)

I like her,....but.. Posted: 10/1/2009 11:18:01 AM
I'm a quiet person too, but can be impatient at times. I actually find it attractive if someone calls me on it as it helps me to be more aware of my attitude and allows me to communicate with my partner instead of browbeating. The reason she treats you like a child is you've allowed it. Do you love her? Stand up to her! Get that dialogue going. People here are so quick to say "Kick to the curb." Some things are worth working for, right? Or do you prefer to passive-aggressively post complaints?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 41 (view)

Another confused question Posted: 10/1/2009 11:11:09 AM
One of my big red-flag items is men who are chronically busy. It works both ways. There's any number of reasons why she's putting you off (married was my first thought), however, you can nip this in the bud right now. Call her and say you'd like to see her in the next week and you'd like to set the day and time. If she hems and haws, then tell her you aren't interested in waiting for her to make up her mind. She'll either appreciate you putting your foot down or she'll blow you off again. You have nothing to lose.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 21 (view)

Don't drop that soap Posted: 10/1/2009 10:55:55 AM
No one I know is in a relationship with someone in prison and it doesn't appeal to me in the least. There is a certain appeal to women of low self-esteem to men who have been "misunderstood by society." There is unfortunately a lot of taking advantage of said women in that situation too. If your friend managed to skew the norms in this case, more power to her!

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 13 (view)

New Feature: I viewed Posted: 9/29/2009 7:03:00 PM
OK I'm not crazy. My "I viewed" had people I don't recognize. Looks like it was a test and it failed.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 10 (view)

All the News You Need to Know Posted: 9/24/2009 8:14:17 PM
To reiterate, my thought is you can't legislate smells, and who is to decide what is offensive? I happen to believe that heavy smokers stink far worse than people who have worked up a sweat exercising or doing their daily jobs. It's a ridiculous law. Are you sure this isn't from Washington? If someone stinks, or their perfume makes me sick and I'm in a public place or on public transportation, it's on me to leave, not the other way around.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 32 (view)

When is it just part of dating and when is it a blow off? Posted: 9/19/2009 6:39:00 AM
Even in times of extreme busy-ness, everyone has a moment to write a note or make a brief call that says, "Hey I'm buried right now, but I am really looking forward to spending time with you soon." To do nothing or to make excuses when pressed tells me they aren't making you a priority.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 21 (view)

mixed messages Posted: 9/19/2009 6:30:51 AM
I'm really busy... I work too much, but will make time for the right girl... My kids come first and I'm really busy with them, but will find time for you... I'm not looking for a relationship, but want to date, screw, spend time, have fun... Thanks, but no thanks. There's a whole world of men out there who are none of the above. Find one and enjoy him.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 87 (view)

should I tell His wife he's cheating? Posted: 9/18/2009 7:38:50 PM
So what if you tell this woman her husband is cheating and she is so bereft she commits suicide? That may be far-fetched, but you ought to examine your motives. What is she to you? Do you have a friendship/relationship with her? Does your ex-wife have a nasty STD that you need to warn her about? Or are you still smarting from being cheated on and think that outing this guy will make you feel better?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 14 (view)

Can one be too positive? Posted: 9/18/2009 7:07:29 PM
This is why I believe in dating casually at first, including dating others if the opportunity presents itself. Putting all of your eggs in one basket makes you feel pretty lonely if that basket doesn't hold up. It needs time to develop or flounder as the case may be. The only exception is when you both are completely ga-ga from the get-go and can't stop calling, texting, making plans. If that happens, run with it!

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 83 (view)

Impatient in meeting Posted: 9/18/2009 6:58:20 PM
Once we've exchanged phone numbers, I'm already looking ahead to my schedule thinking that if the phone conversation goes well, I'd like to meet. I'm not going to drag it out over weeks and then meet someone. I learned the hard way letting something build up over months (long distance) only to meet and feel...nothing. It was like kissing a relative. What a bummer! I'd say if you hit it off in email/phone, you should try to get together within a week or so. It's not a hard and fast rule, but a guideline.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 28 (view)

Meeting her other suitors? - wtf Posted: 9/18/2009 6:38:53 PM
Hard to believe at 46 I am as naive as I am...but yes. I can't even fathom most of this ever happening in my world.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 13 (view)

seeking inspiration and comfort re: cancer Posted: 9/18/2009 6:27:11 PM
I'm so sorry about your friend Wiyan. I missed the thread when you started it, but read it just now. You did do the right thing.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 17 (view)

Halloween costume ideas Posted: 9/18/2009 6:31:22 AM
But it's so much more fun to have you tell me! I looked her up and it's a great idea! I already have the long curly hair and I've been known to go red now and then. I found a great site with instructions for the costume.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 38 (view)

Texting over Calling or Both?? Posted: 9/17/2009 7:44:40 PM
I have to say many of you have a lot of rules and conditions about dating. I hope that works for you. I like being in touch, so if a man calls, writes, texts, IM's or emails me, I'm good with that. Obviously longer, serious conversations should be in person or over the phone, but quick little messages or "Hey would you like to grab a bite after work?" is fine with me. I don't have a lot of rules and I date a lot. Wonder if there's a connection?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 16 (view)

Signing forum posts.... Posted: 9/17/2009 6:59:14 AM
I think it's completely unnecessary, but I don't let it bother me. I don't even sign my email, unless it is through work, and even then I have my signature info that automatically shows up.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 13 (view)

When break-up jealousy becomes revengeful, crimminal, suicidal or homicidal. Posted: 9/16/2009 8:20:22 PM
There was a shooting this afternoon in Lake Stevens that is thought to be another domestic murder suicide.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 16 (view)

Are we all looking for perfection? Posted: 9/16/2009 5:31:15 PM
I think perfection is a feeling and not a look.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 8 (view)

Removal of who saved my profile counter has dramatic affect. Posted: 9/16/2009 7:13:15 AM
I was being sarcastic. I really don't care how many have looked and I'd never noticed it.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 15 (view)

Halloween costume ideas Posted: 9/16/2009 6:43:03 AM
I'm super hero/nemesis challenged. Who is poison ivy?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 5 (view)

Removal of who saved my profile counter has dramatic affect. Posted: 9/16/2009 6:35:10 AM
There was a counter?

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 37 (view)

Star Patrick Swayze dead at the age of 57 Posted: 9/15/2009 8:50:37 PM
I figure if you're already dx with incurable cancer and you get enjoyment from smoking, quitting's not going to cure you and might make you feel worse. I'm a non-smoker, but I support his right to continue on with it.

Childlike Wonder

Joined: 8/29/2009

Msg: 15 (view)

Star Patrick Swayze dead at the age of 57 Posted: 9/14/2009 8:02:41 PM
Silken Fire, that's a beautiful memory.

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