Moving in with your partner. chat & forums.

Posted In Forum:

Home

MyForums

Show ALL Forums

Author

Thread: Moving in with your partner.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 23 (view)

Moving in with your partner. Posted: 6/11/2009 8:01:36 AM
Almost 2 years. I have a child, so I wasn't interested in jumping into living together. We moved in together in November of this year and bought a house in April. So far so good. I guess if you don't have children, you can take more risks and do it quicker. However, if you're a parent, you have to use more caution IMO.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

LTR's: Best Friend or Head Over Heels in Love Posted: 12/12/2008 7:09:57 AM
I know, ideally a marriage or LTR would have both of these things. But, what if you can't seem to find both? Are you better off with the guy who is like a good friend, a good support system, but maybe you're not really crazy in love with or passionate about? Someone who you like and care for, and who is dependable. Or With the guy who you're crazy in love with (after years together), have great passion with, and while you maintain a good friendship... you have some minor personality incompatibilities that make you have to work a little harder at it sometimes to be considerate of the other person and make things work?

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 19 (view)

He used to be a drug dealer... Posted: 11/12/2008 6:24:47 PM
Depends on how long ago and what he has done since. I wouldnt automatically exclude someone based on it though. Some people are so self aware and centered that they can do crazy things without sacraficing themselves, and eventually move on from these things more enlightened. Others are just crazy. It takes some time to figure out which category a person falls in.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 108 (view)

Why do men like to give women backrubs? Posted: 11/10/2008 5:37:17 PM
Men are visual, and they get to feel you up in the process. My boyfriend gives the BEST head to toe rub downs, and it always leads to sex... but I think that's alright with both of us!

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

Ex LDR Issue Posted: 11/9/2008 2:41:56 PM
Sounds like it might be worth another go. Seems like you both want it, and your breakup appears largely circumstantial. Kudos to you for knowing her well enough to know she was just burdened with stress and not lashing out at you out of spite. If I can ask, why did you transfer schools? Is it possible she perceived this as you "abandoning" her emotionally during a difficult time? That could be a reason she's holding back, she may feel like you let her down when she really needed you to be there. I can't speak for all women, but my ideal man is my "rock", there for me when times get tough, someone I can lean on. While I recognize that I am solely responsible for comforting and supporting myself, it does feel much better when my boyfriend is there for me in a meaningful way. If he habitually wasnt, that would be an issue. Not saying you had a habit of not being there for her, but just that "being there" might be something she deems very important. Your move, though logical, may have done some emotional damage. Whatever happens, good luck to you!

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 243 (view)

Most Wild Place You Had sex! Posted: 11/6/2008 6:56:43 PM
Beach, on the rocks leading out to the lake, the back room at radio shack (my high school job), hot tub.... i think thats it.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 29 (view)

My best friend is a girl. Posted: 11/3/2008 5:10:35 PM
My best friend is a guy... and we DO NOT share a bed. Clearly your family has very lax personal boundaries. It may work for you, but it sounds like it isnt working for the gf. So, change this habit for her, or move on without her. Frankly, I try not to pass judgement... but this really does sound creepy and I almost wonder if we have a troll on our hands?

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 12 (view)

Why is sex on the first date such a big deal? Posted: 11/2/2008 8:08:50 PM
No big deal. My bf and i did, and we've been together for 19 months now. We're actually moving in together in 2 weeks. We were pretty much an item from the first night, though it became official about 10 days later. If you both are on the same page, then it's fine.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 73 (view)

she only c*ms when she's on top Posted: 11/2/2008 7:14:53 AM
Generally, I cum quicker and easier on top. BUT, it is more intense when I'm not on top (clit orgasm vs. gspot) Cuming when a girl is not on top is tougher, because you have to get the right angle and hit the right spot. And then do it exactly like that for a minute or so to push her over the edge. The problem is, most men don't hit the spot and women don't know how to position themselves to get it. And, if a man does hit it, usually he's moving around so much he misses it on the next thrust. It takes some coordination for sure. Just communicate with her, try to give eachother signals. Like she can say "right there" when you hit that spot or something. Just experiment and have fun!

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

Would Single Moms Do it over Again? Posted: 11/1/2008 4:55:05 PM
No. I wouldn't I love my son, but the circumstances aren't what they should be. I dont believe he's "damaged" from the way our lives have went, but I think it's far from ideal for both of us.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

Does anyone make LOVE anymore????? Posted: 10/28/2008 7:51:42 PM
My current is the only one I've really ever made love to. I think that's why I havent gotten bored with it, and he's so much better than anyone else. The idea of sex with anyone else just seems so boring and unfulfilling. It is a beautiful thing when you find someone you can connect with on that level.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 21 (view)

Everything changes in time Posted: 10/24/2008 10:34:23 PM
my boyfriend and I are still pretty kissey face like we were when we started dating almost 19 months ago. It's not as constant, because sometimes we do fight or have out issues. But, when times are good, they're still like that most of the time.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 36 (view)

Taking a paycut to spend more time with your children...... Posted: 10/20/2008 4:21:07 PM
I did it. It was cheaper to take a paycut than to pay for after care and summer/holiday care. Plus, then we get to get home and have time to cook dinner, do homework, and spend time together. BUT-- doing this can come with a price professionally, so I'm very carefully monitoring my performance at work to be sure I exceed expectations and never allow this to hinder my growth professionally. I have a great boss who is all for empowering women, so that certainly helps.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 81 (view)

17 and 3/4 year old girl wants a tattoo .. HELP? Posted: 10/20/2008 4:18:49 PM
Life lesson: Being an adult means learning delayed gratification. A few months is not long to wait. If she wanted a fancy new car, she'd have to save up and wait a while first right? Thats just life. Don't create a coddled adult-child. Let her wait it out, she'll have time to really think about what kind of tattoo she wants, and she'll appreciate it more.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 894 (view)

Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with? Posted: 10/19/2008 9:43:51 AM
I've been asking myself this question a lot lately due to some infidelity in my relationship. Here's what I think... yes. Some cheating is purely physical, and in that way you get your physical needs met, and move on. You don't care about the person, you just are meeting a need. And while its horribly disrespectful to the person you love, and breaks their trust and faith.... it does not necessarily mean you don't love them. Only that in that moment you placed meeting a physical need above the emotional vow you have made-- which, after being in a relationship a long time is probably easier to do than most people would like to admit. Or, you can emotionally cheat. You're intrigued by someone, they offer you a new perspective, something different and you can't help but be curious. Again, in that moment this shiny new thing demands your attention moreso than the tried and true comfort of your love. Is it right? No. Should a mature adult be expected to control themselves despite these temptations? Absolutely. But, I'll never put myself on a pedastal, and I don't expect the people I care about to be perfect either. So, I am capable of understanding and forgiving these lapses in judgement. But, can I then continue a relationship with a person who would hurt me in that way? Well, I don't have that answer yet.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 260 (view)

Has anyone ever broken the bed? Posted: 10/15/2008 4:37:30 PM
My old bed had those wooden slat things too and the same thing would happen. My boyfriend and I would always crack up over it. I just moved and got a new bedframe... as funny as it was at the time, I think we're both glad to be relieved of that worry. Consider 18 months of dating= lots of sex X bed that breaks regularly.... it happened a lot!

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 23 (view)

Does daddy help support me? Posted: 10/14/2008 7:58:18 PM
If he asks, I would simply state that child support is an issue for Moms and Dads, and not children. Let him know he is loved and cared about and that is all that is important. If he presses that the friends mom tells him... use the standby "what other parents do is their business, but I am YOUR mom and I make the rules in our family" You don't have to talk about it with him if you're not comfortable. Personally I think the kids mom looks pretty trashy that her son is being told these things. Be glad your son will never embarass you like that =)

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 8 (view)

Being there for your partner Posted: 8/24/2008 9:53:59 PM
He doesnt have to work two jobs. Lives at home, has no debt, etc. He is an ambitious saver, and does it to have extra income. Ie- its out of desire, not need. We don't live together. And I cannot afford to hire a mover. We have discussed this, on more than one occassion. I just feel like my needs don't really occur to him naturally. I dont expect him to mindread my every desire... but I consider these situations pretty basic where I would expect my SO to be there. It doesnt seem to come naturally to him to think about me, and I wonder if that indicates how he really feels about me, or how serious he really is about us.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Being there for your partner Posted: 8/24/2008 8:40:53 PM
My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year and a half. We've both discussed marriage, the future, etc. He says his intentions are serious, but I have a lot of reservations based on actions. This is obviously one side of the story, but here is my question: How much, and at what point, do you expect your partner to "be there" for significant times in your life. Either to help, or provide support/companionship. At 10 months of dating my son had his birthday. My boyfriend works a second part time job that he can easily take time off from (and the income is disposable). He chose not to attend. He went from Thanksgiving to the 4th of July without seeing my family at all. And when I planned my upcoming move several weeks ago, he assured me he'd be there to help. Now, 6 days notice, he tells me he cannot take the time off work. His excuse is valid, but I am a little infuriated. I was really counting on his help. All of these things have really bothered me, because I think part of having a serious relationship with someone is being a part of their life. Being involved, and being there for significant events. I feel like he just isnt. He says he's 100% serious, I say his actions tell a different story. He swears I am misinterpreting. Would these things bother you? Do you expect your SO to be available for big events like birthdays, holidays, and moving? I dont want to complain about the moving thing, because I know he doesnt have much wiggle room at work. But, I told him weeks ago about this, and I cant believe he didn't either plan to be available, or tell me sooner that he wouldnt be.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 86 (view)

leashes? Posted: 8/24/2008 8:44:57 AM
I used to think these things were horrible. Always mocked people who used them. Then I had a toddler who would literally RUN in stores. If he got out of his stroller or my arms, he thought it was HILARIOUS to RUN across the store and through clothes racks. I never did buy one of those leash things, because the idea never occurred to me until he was old enough not to need it (He's 5 1/2 now and has obviously outgrown this game). But, I think for a similar child like my son, I might have considered it for a short term usage. If you have a toddler who you cant really reason with yet who insists on running... what are you supposed to do? I'm all for home training and working with them, but sometimes you need to get somewhere and get things done. While I havent used one, I wouldnt rule one out, nor would I condemn their usage. I would just hope people dont use them as a babysitter for their kids (like, "they are on a leash, I dont need to watch them now") because then they'll never learn appropriate and safe behaviors in stores. I think people are assuming a parent puts them on the leash and then totally ignores them, and I think that may happen sometimes, but its certainly not the rule. Heck, the leashes arent that long, its not like mom could wander 25 ft away and not know what the kid is doing.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 21 (view)

strange for me to WANT to date single moms? Posted: 8/23/2008 6:56:21 AM
Agree with the poster above "single moms ok" is nice, but not creepy. I dont know that I would tell women "I like dating single moms" because that can be misinterpeted. Just say you have dated single moms and you are open to whomever you fall in love with whether they have children or not. Single mothers are treated, by some men, like the scum of the earth (Thanks Reagen, Bush, Bush II....). There is a political and social comment that throws a ton of absurd and hurtful labels on every single mother, regardless of their individual lifestyle or success. I think its great that you are open to dating women with children. We need more men like you!

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 24 (view)

I'm scared to death HELP. Posted: 8/23/2008 6:49:39 AM
Most women are so clueless that they wouldnt know the difference. And I'd reason that most wouldnt care at all. The first time I was with an uncut guy I really couldnt tell the difference. Once you're aroused, its pretty much all the same.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 246 (view)

Smarter ladies have worse sex Posted: 8/19/2008 6:24:02 PM
Correlation does not equal causation. There are likely other factors at play here.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 14 (view)

Chances of Pregnancy Posted: 8/18/2008 6:34:36 AM
She can grasp for "likelihood" or "chance" but it wont give her the answer she is looking for. Either get the EC pill, or wait it out and take a test.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

Stranger Danger over hyped or a necessity? Posted: 8/12/2008 5:27:13 PM
Well, OP, even "good communities" have crime. Don't believe that your suburban utopia is somehow insulated. Bad people live everywhere. They may be less concentrated in your area, but they exist. I think a reasonable amount of precaution and education is always a good idea. But, do you want to know what irritates the hell out of me? When a parent teaches "stranger safety" and then abandons their kid to be unsupervised. I was at a local park a few weeks ago and my son was playing with a kid he didnt know. I went over and was talking to both boys for a second (walked over from my seat on the bench where I had been supervising from). The boy says "You're a stranger, I can't talk to you, my mom says I cant talk to strangers", almost like Rain man. Not wanting him to start shrieking or something, I go sit back down. I sit and watch the kids play another 45+ minutes and start scoping to see if this kids mom/dad are anywhere. Not once in nearly an hour did she come over, check in, or anything. Didnt even see her in the distance, she was not visble from where we were. Now tell me, do you think stranger safety means you can just send your 4-5 yr old out on their own? People just are so illogical with this stuff. Yes, educate your children on public safety, but also BE A PARENT and monitor them in public.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Cultural difference Posted: 8/12/2008 5:10:27 PM
Totally agree TDH. My boyfriend is African American, I am culturally void for the most part having no solid cultural identity from my maternal or paternal side. But, there are still some differences between my boyfriend and I. A silly example- for Easter, when I talked about eating the hard boiled eggs he was totally disgusted. He couldnt imagine ever eating the eggs. I was thinking "why go through the trouble of cooking them if you're just going to throw them away!" I dont know if this was cultural per se, but it could have been. Also, he refers a lot to "home training" which a lot of my black friends say. We were going to [a black] church with some friends of mine and it was my first time going. We were planning dinner after. He says, how late do you think we'll be at their house and I say "well, church should only be what 45 minutes? an hour" and then with dinner, I'd say we'll be done in 2-3 hours" and he just started laughing and said "you've never been to a black church have you?" I guess the point is... he doesnt think I'm weird, and I dont think he's weird. I enjoy his differences because they enrich me by making me more aware of the world. When we do come across something that is quirky or different about the other we either laugh about it, and/or seek to understand it. I've always related more to other cultures than my own though, so I guess I have a good "progressive" belief system that allows me not to pre-judge. And going forward, we've had a lot of talks about how we would raise children as well. We both agree that its not my job to teach "italian/romanian" heritage, and his job to teach "african" heritage. We are both responsible for knowing eachothers history and teaching our children about their whole selves, not just our pieces. Early in our relationship there was something on CSPAN (I love cspan, haha) about the Dred Scott decision, and I knew what the decision did and he did not. So I think I proved my cultural awareness early on.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 24 (view)

Does penis gets bigger the more you use it? Posted: 8/11/2008 5:12:55 PM
It may have been that you were a little swollen from all the "activity" and so if "felt" bigger, but in fact you were just tighter. Just a thought...

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Only child... guilt? Posted: 8/10/2008 7:27:13 PM
Do you ever feel guilty for having an only child? I had my son at 18, I am now 24. I've at least 4-5 years away from being "ready" (married, etc) to have another child. By then, he'll be about 10ish. At that point, he'll enjoy having a sibling, but it wont be like having a brother or sister to "grow up" with. By the time the kid is really relatable (4-5 years), he'll be a teenager and probably doing his own thing. This makes me feel really guilty sometimes. I feel sad that he is missing out on having a sibling. Does anyone else feel this way sometimes? What do you do?

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 22 (view)

CSA Arrears -Is there any to beat it? Posted: 8/10/2008 5:31:58 PM
A case of too little too late. Everything you do should be done through the courts. She is a b___ for turning you in, but you're just as much as fault for not covering your own a__.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 59 (view)

Do you feel closer to a person after you discover flaws and love them anyhow? Posted: 8/3/2008 7:59:17 AM
I dont know about body imperfections, as in, looking for flaws. His body is gorgeous to me, but I dont really analyze it. But in a bigger picture, yes, when I get upset over "flaws" (or just differences) and we work through it, it does make me feel more devoted and committed to him. It just shows that your relationships is durable and could make the long haul... which is what I am hoping for.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

What are the percentage of people on here just for sex or an actual relationship? Posted: 8/3/2008 7:51:06 AM
When I was looking, I was looking 100% for a LTR only. I found it 16 months ago, and now I am just looking to join in the forums occassionally. Everyone is different.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 38 (view)

Poor kid :( Posted: 7/22/2008 3:48:21 PM
Get saline nose drops. My son used to cough to the point of vomiting, and I was told the same thing "it'll pass" Finally someone suggested saline drops, and it's been a godsend for the last 5+ years. If those dont work then it's not post-nasal drip. Another possibility (another affliction my son had) is Asthma. My son would never wheeze like a normal asthmatic kid- instead, he would violently cough. The only thing that made it stopped was a breathing treatment... but the machine and medicine need to be prescribed for that. Keep fighting with the docs if you have to. I know they're hesitant to diagnose some things until several reoccurences (asthma, for example). So, keep going and documenting your concerns even if you feel like nothing is happening. Eventually (if not already), you'll have a significant log of your complaints and can really push for a more thorough explanation of whats happening. Best of luck!

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 164 (view)

If you cannot feel sexual chemistry, should you continue to date someone? Posted: 7/13/2008 2:42:56 PM
Give it a few dates at least. You never know. Sure, chances are that you just arent "into" that person... but sometimes we assume or categorize too much. Example: Several years ago I met this guy, typical nerdy guy. He had a degree in Polymer Science from one of the most academic colleges in this area. He dressed a little "mature", and was kind of a dork. But, I like dorks, so I went out with him anyways. The first few dates I wasnt really feeling "it". But, after a few weeks he started to grow on me. And, when we eventually had sex... WOW, he blew my mind! He was the best i had had up until that point. So, never assume you have someone figured out! They could just surprise you!!

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

Child support as a weapon? Would you date a girl with drama like this? Posted: 7/13/2008 8:55:14 AM
Abuse/Manipulation... I'd stay away from any girl like that. The priority should be on helping to protect and foster the childs emotional wellbeing, not extort money.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 11 (view)

Researching Potential Partners Posted: 7/10/2008 4:56:29 PM
I google, myspace, and check court records. Call it prying... but you can never be too careful. But, I wouldnt TELL them you did it. Same thing- if someone did it to me, I wouldnt care, but hearing about it would make me feel weird. Keep it as your secret.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 12 (view)

Is it ok for straight guys to be watching porn together with no women around? Posted: 7/6/2008 7:23:16 PM
The first time I saw porn, it was a couple of male friends watching. But, they were also 12-13 yrs old. This seems kind of juvenile to me, but to each their own.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

Orgasms for Women using the 'O' technique Posted: 7/3/2008 5:46:08 PM
Justem, I agree. The sex with my current beau is the best I've ever had, still, after 15 months. And I think its because I really care strongly and deeply for him in an emotional way that I havent felt with anyone else. And I think its really sad for these girls if they get the best sex from fingers!!! I dont mind finger or tongue foreplay, or even cumming from it occassionally... but when all is said and done, I want a penis in me. That will give me the kind of satisfaction nothing else can. I think its equally weird when women get into toys more than their men. Must not have very good men! Toys, fingers, whatever else can be fun to play with... but I want to feel HIM inside me more than anything else.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 27 (view)

Plutonic living Posted: 6/28/2008 2:50:56 PM
I've lived with a male roomate for 2.5 years. Nothing has ever happened, and my boyfriend has never had a problem. Youre either being insecure, or your gut is telling you something. Time will reveal the truth.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 29 (view)

Grabbing her feet and rubbing your c0ck on it - weird? Posted: 6/27/2008 5:25:23 PM
I think she was playing/joking with you. I think you're reading too much into it. She probably just wanted to make light of it and let you know she wasnt freaked out. I'm not into foot sex regularly, but Im always open to my boyfriend rubbing it just about anywhere on my body when the mood is right.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 11 (view)

For ladies, best/favorite position to feel your guy come?? Posted: 6/26/2008 6:23:13 PM
Not so much a position, but an "angle" If he is pushing "up" more, or putting more pressure "up" towards the clit area, I feel it more. Sometimes I can't feel it at all.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 25 (view)

Do girls have regrets Posted: 6/25/2008 6:47:53 PM
I dont have a "one" who got away. But I do have some where I wonder how things could have been had I made different choices in dating. As of now, I have a great guy, with some serious relationship flaws... and I'm stuck in this dilemma now. Do I let him go and acknowledge that we're probably just at different points in our lives? And if I do, will he be "the one I let get away", or do I hold on and see if maybe there is some hope of salvage knowing that if it doesnt work, things will probably end badly. God I hate dating!!!

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 59 (view)

Too many children? Posted: 6/25/2008 6:45:07 PM
3? at 25? Thats nothing... I've seen 7 at 23!!! Side effect of working at a social service agency I suppose. And she was working on 8 Seriously though, you set your boundaries and live with them. It may be a dealbreaker for you, maybe not for someone else.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 32 (view)

How long does it take to get good at sex? Posted: 6/25/2008 5:45:41 PM
I've been told I was good from the beginning. Even when I felt like I didnt know what I was doing. And I always just figured I was being told that because he wanted to be nice. But, the reviews have been fairly consistent... who knows?

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 38 (view)

Respect Posted: 6/23/2008 6:56:18 PM
Oh come on people, lay off her. Its a good principal to practice. I dont think she was attacking all men. Just giving a little guidance available to anyone who might find it helpful in learning to emapthize. OP-- I used to say the same thing to my sons father when he would get physically violent with me. It was the only thing that would calm him down. Thankfully, I had the strength to leave early enough in the relationship that it never got too too far. But yes, the perspective did mellow him out, at the least the first few times I said it.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

Birthcontrol after 45 Posted: 6/22/2008 6:54:41 PM
The copper (10 yr) IUD gives heavier periods. The Mirena (5 yr) makes many women stop their periods within the first year. I stopped after one month. It was not that painful to get put in, just like a period cramp. There are risks, everything has risks, but the IUD is the safest most effective non-permanent form of BC. Talk to your doctor.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 36 (view)

Why Do We Stay In Relationships That Are WAAAY Beyond The Expiration Date?? Posted: 6/22/2008 6:21:24 PM
Because no matter how bad it feels right now, there are always good memories. And it takes time to accept that the good things are truly beyond repair.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 113 (view)

Not even spit, so forget about swallow.... Posted: 6/22/2008 6:15:00 PM
I am a vegetarian, so I am very careful about what I ingest. If I think too much about what "it" is, it is kind of gross. But, in the moment, I will always do it for him. It's a small sacrafice. I'm sure he doesnt love swallowing my juices... but its an act of love, intimacy. Its a bonding experience. Plus, if you just hold it all until he's done, its one gulp and you're finished. It feels like a lot but it really isnt. And then you can gently massage it with your mouth for a few.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 69 (view)

Why have so many women never had an orgasm? Posted: 6/22/2008 6:12:05 PM
A woman has to know herself. Know what works for her physically, but also know how to focus herself mentally. Sex is 99% mental to me. He can hit the right spot all night long... if I dont want it to happen, or if I'm distracted... it wont happen. But, if hes hitting the right spot and I want it to happen, I can get there in less than a minute. Just like men, women have to be trained to hold themselves and control when they come. If you can control it, then you know yourself well enough to know what works and doesnt. There are a lot of women who are just as clueless about their own bodies as men. I started exploring early and got comfy with myself. Its sad that not all women do the same.

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 34 (view)

Sex/playing around in the shower Posted: 6/22/2008 6:08:54 PM
In theory its great... but the logistics suck! My boyfriend is average height, but I'm pretty short... and things dont exactly "line up" in the shower. A tub may be a different story... but a normal size tub is pretty crowded too!!

melissamelissa

Joined: 4/2/2006

Msg: 28 (view)

Back to Monogamy? Posted: 6/22/2008 6:03:19 PM
People can absolutely change. I am a totally different person than I was 10 years ago. My values, beliefs, principles, etc... have all changed. My lifestyle is different, my ambition level and focus are much higher. And my ideas about monogamy and relationships are MUCH MUCH more reserved. And I didnt find jesus or anything like that... I just realized that the choices I had been making just weren't fulfilling me. But, I've also lived as a 'different' person for about 4+ yrs. So, I think time is the true test of whether or not this "reform" is pure and real. Think about this, she may have been intrigued by swinging... it was new, exciting, erotic, risque. She did it, had a great time, and eventually it became routine like everything else. And thus she realized the fulfillment was temporary and that since it didnt make her feel unique in that way anymore, it wasnt an activity she wanted to exert her energy on anymore. Its certainly possible!

Show ALL Forums