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topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 11 (view)

Drinking. Posted: 5/31/2009 6:37:13 AM
I'm not anti drink.....but am anti drink too much. I've seen 1st hand what alcohol can do to some people (they think they are Mike Tyson - using the fists to readily) I do drink but not often and never enough to get me tipsy, I can enjoy a night out just drinking cola. I like to keep my full faculties intact. About 30yrs ago I got drunk once....that was enough for me to say never again, feeling like cr*p all the next day is not a good feeling

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 63 (view)

urgent advice needed please Posted: 5/26/2009 11:47:51 AM
I have read with great interest all the replies to this post....some gave very useful advice. For the ones who criticised the lady in question, I guess you have never been in an abusive relationship (forgive me if I'm mistaken) I used to read or see programmes on TV about women who had been beaten up etc etc....and always said "stupid for sticking around and not doing anything about it" until that is, that it happened to myself. I married someone who was kind, caring, a perfect gentleman... before we married....he changed a month or two into our marriage he was like Jekyll and Hyde, one day all loving the next violent. I was pertrified of him, I told someone what he was like behind closed doors and this person confronted him, told him if he laid a finger on me again to expect trouble.....when he came home he told me about this friend and what had been said....then he beat the living daylights out of me and all the time he was beating me he was saying I had brought it on myself for telling outsiders about our marriage and if I ever told anyone again he would make sure I never would speak again. I stuck it out for 6yrs, then one day after he broke my cheek bone (he usually marked my body where nobody could see) I decided enough was enough if he was going to kill me I would make sure he paid for it....I went to the doctors who documented all my injuries, then I was sent to the hospital for treatment and the police came to the hospital and took my statement. He was arrested and locked up for 48hrs....restraining order etc he used to phone dozens of times a day and night I recorded the calls, I didn't anser them I let the machine get them, gave them to the police who had a "word" with him. I didn't hear anymore off him.... I moved away and I divorced him....lucky for me I have never seen him since.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 44 (view)

Does life really begin at 40? Posted: 1/10/2009 5:39:12 AM
When I turned 40.....I was over the moon....had met my 2nd hubby and he taught me things I had never heard of (sexually) he didnt bother if I bought new clothes of my choice or ask what I had spend the housekeeping on (shame he was a wife beater).....my 1st hubby I married at 19 met him when I was 17.....I hadn't a clue that sex lasted more than 3 minutes and you only did it to get pregnant.....and I had to ask his permission to buy thing and produce the receipts.......how naive was that lol..... from the age of 50 to now (I'm 60) I'm having a great time....live alone, do what I want when I want....live can be soooo good

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

Would you consider a back-up buddy? Posted: 1/10/2009 5:24:28 AM
Whats the point in having a glorified lodger....I would rather live alone than share my house just for the sake of company.......if I was to have someone live again with me it would be for a full relationship

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 20 (view)

Used to being single Posted: 12/27/2008 9:49:19 AM
I like being single....have been on my own for nearly 6yrs, apart from a couple of relationships....do what I want, when I want....I do like having friends round but sometimes glad to see the back of them if they have stayed over for a few weeks....My son has moved in for a little while until he finds a flat (recent divorce) and I tend to get uptight and asking if he's going out....he's no trouble, in fact very helpful around the house....but I do miss my space....yep very selfish of me.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 215 (view)

Are You Comfortable With Your Age ? Posted: 12/27/2008 9:41:45 AM
Why shouldn't we be comfortable with our ages....nothing we can do to change it....unless you want to tell lies of course I'm very comfortable with my age....never hide it, never lie about......some days I feel still in my 30's, other days I feel as if I'm half dead....such is life

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 39 (view)

Would you like an orgasm with those chips?......... Posted: 12/24/2008 6:55:05 AM
In answer to the original post....no thanks.. If the fella can't give a lady an orgasm then he's not good at the job in hand (no pun intended)....I'm afraid some fellas think they are brilliant at sex....well maybe they can turn themselves on but leave the lady thinking what colour to paint the ceiling.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 8 (view)

Last Christmas I gave her my heart !! Posted: 12/24/2008 6:45:00 AM
Suspicious Minds.....I was proved right of course....lol

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 25 (view)

Too obnoxious to boff? Posted: 12/24/2008 6:41:03 AM
I was married to one of those sort of people....lol....note I said was...I must have loved him at one time to marry him.... I'm was a quite shy person so didn't mind him doing all the talking but then it got to the stage my opinion in anything was ignored....I have learned to be a little assertive now

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 43 (view)

Profession? Posted: 12/20/2008 1:20:09 PM
WTF does it matter what job a person does ...does it make them less of a person if they are a bin man (or whatever the PC term is) I couldn't give a monkeys chuff what job someone has it wouldn't stop me being friends or dating them....my ex hubby was unemployed when we met and was still unemployed 6mth later....it didn't stop me seeing him (dating him) we used to 'go dutch' every couple of weeks when he got his giro and have a night out....in between giro's we went to places that didn't cost any money or very little....he did get a well paid job after 6mths....we moved in together and later married.....(money was not the reason for the divorce). I never judge anyone for what their job is....some of my close friends have not worked since marrying....should I stop being their friend?????? I think not. Have a Merry Christmas

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

What women what? Posted: 12/15/2008 11:24:38 AM
You asked 3 questions....well IMO Q1. Why do women look for a cross of Leonardo Decapreo and Chritipher Hawckins--when clearly there punching above there weight? A1. You can keep LC and CH....I prefer a normal everyday sort of fella Q2.Why are more and more women looking for a guy 10 ysr younger or only 2 yrs older than them? I always thought women genrally were always a couple of years more mature in the head? A2. Maybe just maybe younger fellas can stay awake longer and lots of younger fellas prefer a mature lady. Q3. Do guys always do the chasing on the Tinternet? Guys stick up for me , Girls-- Be gentle. Your thoughts PLs A3. Not all fellas do the chasing....most are to lazy to come out of their caves and some of us ladies have to drag them out ....

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

A question for women about IM'ing them Posted: 12/15/2008 11:16:23 AM
I turned my IM feature off...I don't like getting pop up messages off people I have never corresponded with, some people do......each to their own....if I want to chat on IM with someone then we would have already swopped a few PM's (private messages) then gone on to chat on msn...I don't give my msn addy out to all and sundry....only a few people....so even if we do exchange PM's don't assume we will get chatting on msn. I think younger people (16-35) tend to use IM more than older people (45-60+) maybe its an age thing I don't know .... most of 'we' older people were brought up to correspond by letter .

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 43 (view)

Inadequate Presents...........Worthy Of Dumping ? Posted: 12/13/2008 6:38:34 AM
As long as the person has put some thought into the sort of pressy you are given.....(not just gone on the last minute and thought that will do)....I don't think price matters, personally I usually spend a long time thinking what to buy and the suitability for the particular person....whether it be a partner or one of my grandkids. I bought a car (2nd hand) for my ex hubby one year so he could get to work...he had started a new job that would have taken too long to get to by bus....he got me a single rose with a lovely message attached to it....I was happy that he was happy.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 17 (view)

Rich virtual life equals poor real life ????? Posted: 12/13/2008 6:15:54 AM
RL is completely different to VL I prefer the real world to meet people, talk face to face.....virtual friends are just that , virtual....anybody you 'chat' to can pretend to be your friend.....real people who are friends are there to give you a hug when its needed, help you sort out things, have a laugh with, call round for a cuppa or go for night out with....you can't seriously think being online is better than fleshy land. Limit your online time....instead of turning on the pc as soon as you wake up, get home from work etc....phone a 'real fleshy' friend, make arrangements to meet up. ...if you don't have close friends....just go in a cafe/pub, strike up a conversation, you never know that person may become your friend. I chat online to people, but I don't consider them to be my friend unless we have met

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 54 (view)

trimming your waist size Posted: 12/2/2008 6:21:20 AM
It is hard to get rid of a 'mid-drift' bulge (the bit between your bust and waist)especially if you are over 40'ish and have had children. I've been lucky and not really had a problem until 2 year ago when I had an accident and hurt my back....I was unable to walk very far or do any form of exercise for over 12mths....I used to go to the gym 3 times a week and aqua aerobics once a week......now I have the mid-drift bulge and am finding it very difficult to get rid of....I have started back at aqua aerobics though its not done anything to improve my bulge......maybe I will just accept that at my age and in the grand scheme of things it doesn't really matter I'm healthy and happy with myself as I am.....and had no complaints ;-) Oh and the fella who said sex works to keep your weight down ....he is correct.... my doctor told me that

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 36 (view)

When people make excuses to avoid meeting!!! Posted: 11/1/2008 10:19:59 AM
Yes its happened to most of us....not meeting up. I think the trouble is that internet dating is a sweetie shop....you see someones profile....you message....(if lucky) you get a reply....you exchange a few messages....then chat on msn or similar.....exchange moby numbers....arrange to meet up....and lo and behold, the excuses start.... I guess there are lots out there in cyberland who are afraid to come out into fleshyland and just want someone to chat to on lonely evenings......

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 37 (view)

Would You Pay Someone Else To Clean Your Home Posted: 10/17/2008 1:00:45 PM
If I could afford a cleaner/daily help I would have one, I dislike ironing and cleaning windows my house gets a quick tidy and hoovering each evening when I get home from work, but Saturday I spend hours cleaning from top to bottom...I could think of better things to do with my time off work. When I lived abroad many years ago (in army quarters) most of the wives employed someone to do all the housework, the lady that did mine came 3 times a week, 9am until 2pm....she changed the bedding, washed , ironed, sweeped, washed & polished the floors and cleaned the windows....all for £10 per week.....ok that was in the 70's in Hong Kong....I got really spoiled rotten, all she expected in return apart from her 'wage' was her lunch cooking for her....she insisted on egg and chips haha.....she was a gem.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 61 (view)

The male G-Spot: does it exist? Posted: 10/17/2008 12:45:00 PM
I have read through all the posts on this thread and quite honestly I was ' lol ' at some of the replies. Don't knock it until you have tried it. There are a couple of fellas who I was in a relationship with (not at the same time) one of them really enjoyed being 'probed' , I had never thought of this sort of thing before I met him, he bought a butt plug and it was used quite regularly in foreplay he also used it when he did his own hand job. The other fella said he would never do anything so gay....he changed his mind about it one evening after a few drinks and was massaged gently and slowly while having a bj, he said it was the best feeling he had ever had.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

Great Escapes ( or how do you get away from your date ?) Posted: 9/27/2008 11:15:04 AM
Probably the secret is when arranging to meet someone is to have a time limit, say you may be only be able to stay half an hour.... that way if you don't like/get on with each other you haven't wasted a whole afternoon or evening or decided to run away before you even meet. That way you are not being rude. I usually say I will meet for a chat & drink early evening ....or even lunch time which I prefer for a 1st meeting, thats plenty of time to see if you would get on. If you do get on all well and good, then make arrangements for a proper date, maybe later that night if you live close enough or another day/evening. If you don't get on, just say thank you for the meeting and go your seperate ways.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 54 (view)

age is it just a number Posted: 9/27/2008 10:57:46 AM
Whatever age you choose for a partner is entirely up to the two people involved....I couldn't give a toss what people think of the few fellas I have dated in the last 6yrs since my divorce....they were all a lot younger then me, (between 10 & 20yrs) we never had a problem with the age gap and found lots of things in common from music to the places we liked to go. Also our respective family and friends had no hangups about it either. Each to their own....you only have one life so dam well enjoy it....your hell of a long time dead

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 37 (view)

Divorcees.... Posted: 9/27/2008 10:47:39 AM
I remember mine each and every year (24th April) because it was also my late dad's birthday... I think of him with love

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 83 (view)

Should you tell how many times you have been married? Posted: 9/26/2008 12:18:57 PM
I've been married and divorced 3 times....if anyone wants the details why I divorced them, all they have to do is ask....I will be very truthful. Whats the big deal about someone who's been divorced more than once, they like me may have had very good reason to divorce. I didn't believe in 'living' with someone without being married, that was the way I was brought up....I guess its the same for a lot of people of my generation, it was frowned upon and 'sinful'. Now I have changed my mind, I don't want to marry again or even live with someone, I would prefer a relationship where we both had our own homes but saw each other when we wanted to. I cannot for the life of me understand why people lie about themselves

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 27 (view)

How much can you rely on a face in a picture.? Posted: 9/21/2008 10:07:23 AM
I wonder how many people have the programme to air brush photos....I know someone who does that to his photos.....you can only rely on what you can see in person or better still if you get chatting and make arrangements to meet someone make sure you see what they look like on a web cam....and YES I mean their face

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 53 (view)

Are bent penises more sexually satisfying? Posted: 9/21/2008 9:32:58 AM
If the penis is bent too much ...more banana shape then just slight bend... it can be very painful for the lady during intercourse....I know one fella who had to have an operation to straighten his. Its not the insertion of a penis that gives the lady pleasure, she must of course be stimulated on her clitoris before and during intercourse.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 107 (view)

Men shaving all the body... do women like it???? Posted: 9/21/2008 9:19:59 AM
I prefer a fella to be shaved or well trimmed around his dangly bits...its far more hygienic for both males and females....

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 273 (view)

Men and their Age Issue? Posted: 9/20/2008 2:02:27 PM
I can't see the point of lying about your age or anything else....especially if you are going to meet up and hopefully date....doesn't matter what age group you prefer, just be honest about how old you are, we all age there's no getting out of it. I must remember to update my photos on my profile they are between 1-3 yrs old. Yes its happened to me a few years ago, he not only lied about his age he lied about everything, his profile was descibing his son the phot was his son too....it said: 5ft 10in, muscular, 45....he was 5ft 2in, thin and weedy and by the look of him in his 70's....needless to say the meeting lasted all of 10mins, his excuse, you wouldn't have met me if I had told the truth...very true....I had been chatting to him over a month before we met. Now when I get comfortable chatting to someone I insist on using web cam just to make sure they are what they say they are.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 189 (view)

yankeefan66 - right about the picture Posted: 9/20/2008 1:33:27 PM
I have to say I have only read a few of the posts Personally....I don't date men older then myself anymore...they are too set in their ways and prefer to sit by the fire watching TV (which usually means they nod off) even though many tell you they are very active etc etc.... in the past few years since my divorce I have dated men younger then myself, something I thought I would never do, I do have age limits though and very choosy....I had a medium term relationship (16mths) which I ended last year with a fella who was 18yrs younger, why did I end it...neither of us wanted to re-locate....we are still friends and email each other occasionally. Younger fellas who I've dated, like to go out, enjoy life, have stamina and don't treat you like a doormat or expect you to do their washing and ironing. There may be exceptions in some older men that are outgoing and have stamina....I have yet to meet one though.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 203 (view)

Why do some younger men want to have sex with an older woman? Posted: 9/20/2008 12:27:50 PM
I'm a mature lady....I never have to fight for attention or have any problems with younger fellas asking me for dates. I am choosy and do have age limits, I am not looking to teach someone what to do and in need of a sat nav to find his way around, the ones I have dated have been mature, loving and are not just looking for a lady as a trophy. In my limited experience I find fellas my own age act very old for their age and set in their ways, don't want to go out unles its sitting in a pub all night or play bingo (yuk), not very adventurous or have stamina when it comes lovemaking (yes love making, not just sex) nod off at the drop of a hat while watching TV or a film....all in all, don't have any get up and go.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 145 (view)

What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship. Posted: 6/12/2008 9:56:51 AM
IMO.....Men and women over 45+ are looking for something that doesn't really exist in real life (unless you are a model or been under the knife)......they expect their next partner to be good looking, have a perfect body, no hang ups, no baggage. Wake up people, your lucky if you find 2 out out the 4. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, ladies do not have perfect bodies if they have had a few children, men let themselves "go" and still think they are attractive with their big beer guts and lack of dress sense. I'm in my late 50's, I'm no oil painting, I don't have the same shapely body I had when in my 20's, I have aquired a few wrinkles. I do have energy, a sense of well being, look after meself, and, I have a brain that works. Someone mentioned the diminishing sex drive in women as they get older....I beg to differ....that may be the perception of some but 'some' women tend to have more sex drive as they get older as there is no fear of becoming pregnant and can relax more as there are no ankle biters in the house........I can't say the same about fellas.....I have found, with the ones I have dated, they get lazy as they get older (over 50'ish) and have no stamina.....then they wonder why a lot of woman prefer younger fellas than themselves. Well thats my two pennith for what its worth.....

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 86 (view)

How to treat a penis - what everyone needs to know! Posted: 10/2/2007 11:04:55 AM
lol nice one the old ones are the best

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Funny question for the ladies Posted: 10/2/2007 10:45:13 AM
In all honesty....the answer is no.....if I see a photo of a fella I like the look of and his profile is interesting I contact him....if we get on exchanging mail....then its time to arrange a meeting....you cannot possibly know if you want to have a relationship or indeed ever want to jump their bones until you have met.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

oddest things someones asked you to do Posted: 4/6/2007 9:33:02 AM
Got a message off a woman who said she facied me and asked if I would go to bed with her and let her husband watch. I didn't take her up on the offer

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

Jumpers Posted: 12/10/2006 11:35:10 AM
Well said hippychick....the same thing has happened to me (the mention of sex) I have met a couple of guys but they still try it on even after I made it clear I don't sleep around....so I don't see them again. I expect to be in a relationship for a while before I would consider that.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

One Sided Love? Posted: 10/17/2006 5:49:00 AM
well said sammy salt, I think most of us have been in one sided relationships at sometime in our lives and most of us dont go around kicking windows in We cry, we feel lonely, we get over it and start again.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 12 (view)

Could I fall in love again at 56? Do I want to? Posted: 9/1/2006 3:16:08 PM
Im the same age as you and been married and divorced 3 times (I divorced them, if you want to know why send PM) had my heart broken but it mends in time. Im still hoping to find love again, I think thats why most of us are on these sites. Dont give up.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 101 (view)

How many is too many? Marriages I mean . . . Posted: 8/11/2006 12:46:14 PM
I too have been married and divorced 3 times, if anyone cares to message me to find out why then I will tell them, but I have no intention of posting the whys and wherefores on here. I chose the wrong type of guys they had also been married before me a couple of times and I wish I had asked their ex's about them before we got hitched. Would I marry again...who knows.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 226 (view)

I'm Not Attracted To Men My Age.... Posted: 8/8/2006 2:07:57 PM
I thought I would add my two-penneth to this thread, I apologize if it upsets you guys, when I was 17-18 (yes a long time ago) I used to be attracted to older men (in their mid-late 20's) My hubby was 10yrs older than me.....but now I'm in my late 50's I find I'm attracted to younger men (39-45) and them in me. As some of you have commented, a lot but not all men, think they don't have to bother how they look once pasted the 35 mark, men in general my age are mostly big beer gutted and want to sit around doing nothing, well wake up fellas if you take care of yourself we woman may be interested in you, a lot of woman try and stay in trim and take care of themselves to be attractive for you so why can't you do the same for us.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

Ever had an 'ex' that can't accept ' it is over'? Posted: 7/30/2006 5:41:52 AM
My ex was contacting me every few weeks (we have been divorced nearly 4yrs), even though hes now living with the woman I threw him out for seeing, he regrets the day he met her and wishes he was still with me and only stays because he had no where else to go. (as if I would believe him). She found out he contacted me, she phoned and asked me if we were still seeing each other. I was a bit down in the dumps that day and still had feeling for him so I told her why 'in plain English' he still contacts me and forwarded his emails to her (I wont say on here what they said...use your imagination haha) she has left him 4 times and gone back again, stupid woman, it didnt stop him from emailing me. To eventually get him off my back I told a "big lie" and said I was now living with someone and very happy. I hate lies but it was the only way to stop him, Im not living with someone I like my freedom now to do what I want with who I want.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 116 (view)

38-year old man with a 17-year old girl - what is that? Posted: 7/30/2006 4:54:52 AM
Does this go for women with younger men, are they classed 'in your country' as perverts, predators and all the other words that have been used throughout this thread?? I have an aunt who left her husband for a much younger man...they married...she at the time was coming up to 40 he was 19....they have just celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary. Also my brother who was 46 married a girl 16 they have 3 lovely children they were happy together for 15yrs, sadly 6yrs ago he died. Don't condemn what you don't know about just because you have hang ups about age differences.

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 8 (view)

Is it fact or fiction that you would try anything atleast once if it was proven to be safe? Posted: 7/29/2006 4:48:28 PM
Count me into that sentiment skirtsandheels

topaz48

Joined: 4/23/2006

Msg: 54 (view)

Why do women find sex on a first date so weird? Posted: 7/29/2006 3:34:01 PM
Simple answer to that...men call themselves 'studs' not sluts...although its getting quite common now to call a man a slut here in England...Nothing wrong with sex on a 1st date if you feel that way inclined...personally I don't, but maybe on a 2nd date I do...but each to their own...you don't need commitment for sex ....plain lust on both parties works too I was brought up very strict disciplinarian parents and sex before marriage was a definite no-no...but since being married a couple of times and being older (maybe not wiser) I changed my opinions and have had a few 'lovers' since...I brought my kids up to be respectful to girls but if they wanted sex to make sure they were 'careful' and use protection....each generation is more liberal than the last.

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