What's up with this??? chat & forums.

Posted In Forum:

Home

MyForums

Show ALL Forums

Author

Thread: What's up with this???

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 21 (view)

What's up with this??? Posted: 11/17/2009 3:16:24 PM
If they can't put more than 3 sentences in a profile they won't get 3 words from me. This exchange rate is horrible. And Mr. Clean...did you get any messages? I'm not him, but, no. I was using dating sites to attempt to talk to people. But on many sites, looking at who's viewed me, I get a laughable 1 or 2 VIEWS per month, never mind contacts. I just figure that if you sign up as female, your search and email buttons are disabled, and anything else is evidence of a bug that the site owners should fix.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

skipping over issues Posted: 11/4/2009 2:50:21 PM
If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? If an uncomfortable situation comes up, and everyone pretends it never happens, did it actually happen? Some can put the issue out of their mind and move on. That's the method of resolution. It tends to be a pretty male way of doing things. Talking about it just drags it on longer and keeps it fresh in their minds and makes them relive it over and over again. I don't know what your issue is, but maybe let him know that he doesn't have to take responsibility for your feelings. That's likely what that sick feeling is. There's a difference between empathy and sympathy. Empathy is understanding what the other is feeling, sympathy feeling what the other person is feeling. It helps to understand that men are far more linear thinking than women, and women are much better at multitasking and thinking about multiple things at once. So, the unwanted thoughts/moods just kind of linger around while you're thinking about other things, right? And you can't really get rid of them, because there it is hanging out with the other thoughts simultaneously. With a linear thought process, how do you get away from unwanted thoughts? Think about something else to take your mind off it. Also, the capability to not think about anything is greater in men, and so the question of "What are you thinking about?" gets really annoying and even more annoying when they don't believe you that you really weren't thinking about anything. "Nothing" is often a perfectly acceptable answer. I would advise conducting an experiment. Have him ask you what you were thinking about at a random point of the day for the last 3 minutes. List everything you were thinking about, simultaneously or not. That's why you can't "suppress" as easily. Let him know that you talking it out makes you comfortable and happy, and that your feelings are not his responsibility. Also, it helps to let him know to not listen to the words that are coming out of your mouth, the issue itself is completely unimportant (unless the issue is important). But to interpret what you are feeling. I think women should change their speech patterns by attaching what they are trying to communicate. Do they want the issue itself to be listened to, do they want their feelings to be listened to, or a combination of both? It's pretty easy from the guy's side of the fence to look at an issue, discard and filter the illogical emotions behind it, and then try to solve the issue. Fixing/solving things that makes her unhappy makes her happy, right? Not usually, but it's a natural way of thinking. When you get it out of your system, it makes you happy. And don't say this in a manipulative or blackmailing way, but most guys want their girls to be happy, and often go through stupid ridiculous things to make them happy which often goes unappreciated. This is one of the easier things to make you happy. The way to "fix" the issue is to be emotionally heard, am I right? If so, it's so simple it can be overlooked completely.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

how do I know if he's a womanizer? Posted: 10/3/2009 4:55:24 AM
I like women. The best times of my life involve women. I would like the best woman I can get. Am I a womanizer?

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 67 (view)

Why do I usually attract men that I'm not attracted to? Annoying! Posted: 10/2/2009 4:45:19 PM
I think it's funny that you think "You attract". As if you had something to do with it. "The waiter always brings me food I don't like. I wish he would bring something I do like." Have you tried ordering from the menu rather than just letting it come to you? "No, I'm a woman, I shouldn't have to!"

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 24 (view)

So You Get A Note... Posted: 10/2/2009 4:05:10 PM
^^^ guys really notice that stuff?!?! It's not that we want to, but we can't just caveman it and say "You pretty. You come with me on date. Ug." I mean, that would be ideal for myself, that's what I WANT to do. But I know damn well that doesn't work. I don't know what women need. So, might as well "take interest" in her and "notice things about her". And I definitely don't trust her to make a move, that might be a freak of nature. http://xkcd.com/642/

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 8 (view)

I'm looking for honesty...arent we all? Posted: 10/2/2009 11:57:59 AM
I'm looking for the whole thing, but why turn down a good opportunity? Maybe she's not LTR material for me, maybe she is for someone else. But, a FWB situation doesn't have to be a bad thing as long as people are honest with each other and themselves. This honesty includes wanting more or not wanting more from the current relationship, and understanding that one of you may not be at the same level. This honesty involves not going into a FWB situation trying to change it into something more. If I were told "You're not Mr. Right for me, but I'd be ok with you being Mr. Right Now.", this is not an insult. It's a compliment. It doesn't have to be an all or nothing situation. It can just be an agreement until what you are looking for is found, which can be really hard to do. To me, it's like saying "I want a steak" We're out of stakes. How about a bag of chips? Or maybe a sandwich. "No, I'm going to starve myself for the next few years until I get that steak." It just doesn't make sense to me. The thing with people and relationships is, you can't really get full and spoil your appetite.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

If women are emotional, then why are the majority of love songs and blues sung by men? Posted: 10/1/2009 7:21:51 PM
So they can get laid.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

Feminism Posted: 10/1/2009 4:35:13 PM
There are multiple variations of the word. There are people, both men and women that believe in defined gender roles that should not be crossed. Such as work, military, and social roles. For people like myself, it's already granted and not considered an issue. Bringing up the term feminism feels like asking for more than what is already granted, and if I refuse to do any more, I'm a "bad person". I believe in natural gender roles, because on the whole, genders typically have different psychologies, but no one should be limited by those socially. (Physical limitations, you're going to have to take up with your creator, I can't help you there.) Plus, it's called FEMinism, and not egalitarianism. Which the word alone implies special rights, rather than equal rights. I'm not for "women's rights". I'm for people's rights. So, it gets irritating making special exceptions which is sexist in the first place. Plus, asking me to do something gives ME the authority. You have assigned yourself as submissive to my authority, which is a position I didn't want in the first place, and now I see you as weak. I'm also of the belief that if you want special rights, you have to take them and step up to the plate, and not demand them from what you consider a lowered status. I don't believe in blaming "privilege". Consider yourself privileged already, the way is clear as far as I see it. If you blame privilege, you already consider yourself inferior. Walk with the privileged, as the privileged, you don't need permission. Asking for permission isn't what they do. If someone hold you back when you walk with the privileged, then you can raise hell. Carry your own weight and expect no one to do it for you, it earns respect.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

Carrie Underwood's Before He Cheats Posted: 9/30/2009 8:43:38 PM
Why do I keep coming back to this site? I must have a masochistic side. Anyway, it makes me think less of women. They don't know how to pick a guy. They'll blame him. Plus, it sends a message that men are jerks, and I'm tired of hearing that message myself. It just makes me ask questions that I've been asking for years, which I'm pretty sure there's no answer by now. And you don't **** with another man's vehicle. It's more honorable to stab him in the face. I'm sorry Ms. Underwood. Pick them better, treat the GOOD ones right and don't play silly little games, and if you screw up, get out of it and get over it.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

Seriously? You must be kidding.... Posted: 9/30/2009 6:40:29 PM
It depends. But, I'm guessing it's a similar amount of time of waiting is close to the same amount of time you'd be willing to be "dating someone" and the time between dates. If you were dating someone, how long would you wait to see them again? Depends on the person, doesn't it? I say 3 months until sanity degradation begins. As far as "being ready", how long does it take you to figure that out? The idea of "Gee, I don't know, is this a good idea?" isn't a very long lived one, and is brushed away in under a second. So, it's hard to relate. Meanwhile, he might be sitting there thinking "What's wrong with me that she isn't willing to touch me?"

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 15 (view)

Can't figure out what's going on here. Posted: 7/29/2009 12:56:24 AM
Sounds like testing the waters to me. Your response is the answer. You respond positively, great. You respond negatively, he stops...maybe. You respond neutrally or vaguely, it continues.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 8 (view)

which one would you go for? Posted: 7/13/2009 12:14:40 PM
Number 1. Approachability/accessibility is key...immediately following attraction. Both seem to be the same description though, only one is easy, one's hard. There are billions of women who don't want anything to do with me. The special one who gets my attention is the one who isn't a waste of time. Then again, I'm of the belief that it's the woman's job to seduce, it's the man's job to do something with these signals.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 15 (view)

The Ring-a symbol of love or deception Posted: 6/18/2009 1:11:00 PM
I wear middle finger rings, but there's no way these could be interpreted as wedding bands in the slightest. They're thick/wide $15 types.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

Do guys think women who are submissive boring? Posted: 5/11/2009 5:38:05 PM
I am flabbergasted that a 20 year old has to worry about such things as being either submissive or dominant when this is the proper concern of only professional sex workers, otherwise known as prostitutes. I kind of agree with this. I am sick and tired of this. Can't we be normal people who interact in a relationship with respect and compassion toward the other? Or am I asking too much?

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

What Do YOU Look for? Posted: 5/11/2009 2:11:15 PM
In order: Local, photo preferred, body type, substance compatibility, kids. Then we move onto the profile: Do we have common enough interests? Does she seem like someone who would write me back? Does she have a list of demands she wants from a guy, but fails to tell little about herself? Is she going to write me back? Did she put effort into her profile? (Is she taking this seriously or on here for kicks/Is she going to write me back?) Does she use BS dating site cliches? (I like a man who knows what he wants!!) Is she going to write me back? Is she going to write me back, and then be willing to leave the computer to meet me in person?

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

does it matter Posted: 5/11/2009 2:01:26 PM
I can't drive to trailer park with my $90K beemer. Locally, this is quite acceptable. I honestly don't care. As long as they make something.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

Men Missing a True Match due to Candy Store Affect Posted: 5/11/2009 5:18:54 AM
I believe that this is more true on the other side of the gender fence. A candy store would indicate options. It's more like an auction. You place your bid to indicate interest and see what happens. Then the women can decide from the bids which one she wants to talk to. Social myths rarely cause her to place a bid herself.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

sex and love, a guy`s connection Posted: 5/8/2009 9:24:39 PM
In my opinion, sex is less about technique, but attitude. Excitement, enthusiasm, uninhibited. Ego stroking. None of those have to do with technique, but how you're treated and how satisfied she is. I deeply believe that the same description can be used in a romantic way.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 12 (view)

Coming on super strong before we even meet Posted: 5/8/2009 9:20:20 PM
Set the hook and reel like crazy. Otherwise, a shark may steal your catch, or it may let go.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 11 (view)

MEAN GIRLS Posted: 5/8/2009 9:16:25 PM
There are lots of nice girls out that the would treat any man like a king! There is insufficient evidence to back up this claim. I've tried contacting those that I think fit this description, but they must have not hands because they haven't written back. That, or outside of my size limit. It's hard to find those who meet both criteria.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 21 (view)

A southern thing? Posted: 5/7/2009 6:35:59 PM
Honey, if it's north of Arkansas or Alabama, you, my friend are a yankee!!! Yankee rule: Who exactly is a Yankee? World -> American America -> Northerner Northerner -> New Englander New Englander -> Vermonter Vermonter -> Denies this I believe it is a title that is less claimed, but more given.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

A southern thing? Posted: 5/7/2009 5:47:59 PM
Bar/club rule #1. Get women to show up and stay there. The rest will take care of itself.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

Do you resent a passionate virgin? Posted: 5/7/2009 3:08:31 PM
It is frustrating. It's also better than nothing. For me, this applies to women in general. I'm not sure I could take her seriously though, if there are other opportunities out there to be had. Is it "wrong"? Not at all. I applaud that you make it known where you stand. Irritating, but that's your decision. Ok, let's talk about the XBox 360. There are 3 versions. One comes with everything, but it's expensive. One comes with mostly everything. One comes without a hard drive! You can't download games or add-ons or save as much. The one without the hard drive is still fun, but it's also kind of limited to what you can do.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

male sex toys? Posted: 5/7/2009 1:15:11 PM
Of course there is nothing better than the real thing...well, except when you don't want the mouth or brain along with the genitalia! Sigh of relief! Women are pretty good on their own. Why enhance it? I can't forsee getting "bored" or needing to "spice it up."

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

Girls that cry or girls that don't? Posted: 5/7/2009 1:10:54 PM
I want the woman I'm with to be happy. Happy with me. That's all. Then I'm happy. This is a lot to ask. The emotional artistry is attractive and fascinating to look at. I don't get it. But crying too much makes me feel like something is wrong, and it's awkward. However, I do have to hold back chuckles if a hallmark commercial brings her to tears. True story: A friend burst out into tears at a dog food commercial. From an outside perspective, this is absolutely nuts. Of all the people in the room, no one knew quite how to handle this. Apparently seeing the puppy made her think about children, and how she wants children, but isn't at a time in her life where it's appropriate. This thought process took approximately 0.5 seconds. Wow...umm. Good luck with that.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

Can giys just accept it as true? Posted: 5/7/2009 1:15:22 AM
I don't assume that. But mostly it's true. You made two different statements though. "Without attachments" and "Not worth the effort" kind of come together, don't you think? I'm not against "without attachment" situations. I think it's a desire to be fulfilled. But if I'm not given value, why should I return the favor?

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

People of Internet Dating Land tell me what do you think!!! Posted: 5/7/2009 1:11:11 AM
I agree with you. The locals won't respond. Be glad you get booty calls as an option.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

do men really want independent women? Posted: 5/6/2009 1:17:35 AM
Everyone likes to think they can be important to someone else. To believe their presence matters. To feel they are needed in some way. If you're getting a better reaction when you're acting less independent, perhaps your independence is viewed as extremely self-sufficient and men don't see how or where they'd fit into your life. Wouldn't the "I don't need a man!" be just as much of a turn off as a man saying "Who needs women? Not me!" This is a great answer. Typically, a guy wants to feel useful, and maybe do something that he feels appreciated for. In the dating world, what are guys appreciated for? I honestly have no idea. Oh, wait, money. But, when asked, money isn't important, because an independent woman can take care of herself.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

What is the average time & process before you meet in person and who initiates? Posted: 5/5/2009 8:32:21 PM
I have kind of a 2 week rule before I get bored of trying to convince her to show interest and get off the computer already. The sooner, the better. Get. Off. The computer. "But it's dangerous out there! He could be crazy!" What a bunch of misandric phobic crap! It is equally as dangerous when you go out to the grocery store. I know it may FEEL scary, but put some logic for wanting to wait to figure out if you want to meet someone. What is the difference between the average guy on the internet, and the average guy on the street? You want to know how someone REALLY acts? Go outside and meet them. You aren't going to find it by chatting or emailing, you're just going to make a person up in your head, and it begins with the first email. Online dating should be used to alter fate, by showing who's single, who's looking, and allows you to cross paths easier in ways that you wouldn't normally get in person. Although for women, it seems to be a convenient way to rapidly turn away guys and helps feed their rejection quota and makes it feel like they picked the right one, when they eventually pick the same loser that they would have in the first place. Who should ask? In both society and online, WOMEN should ask. It should be a woman's job to do all of the work. I know this opinion is unpopular, and I'm not changing the world with this post. But try making sense! Use logic. Let me explain. Who is the pickier of the genders? Who is more likely to say no? Wouldn't it be more efficient if women just said YES to who they wanted, what they wanted, and not let us guys waste time trying to figure out where we stand and with who? If no one took offense to idea that someone wants to have sex with them gasp, (how disrespectful!!!! ) I would change change those rules too. Then give men the power. We could hand out stickers that say "Dating" "No" "FWB" "ONS" And except for the NO sticker, the rest are flattering. At least they are to me. If a woman were to tell me Dating, FWB, ONS, I would be flattered. Then I have the power to say yes or no. I wish I could do that with women, but I can't. When I debug the world, this is one of the first things I'm changing. I think the hardest part is knowing where we stand. And if you're a waste of time or not. Going out on a simple single date is rarely a waste of time. I'd rather spend 30 mins to 3 hours on a date than sit and chat online and compare facebook apps.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 13 (view)

Chubby but not fat... whats the diff?? Posted: 5/5/2009 6:04:33 PM
Oh, they're the same thing, just of different degrees. If I HAVE to answer though: Chubby - Above average, but doesn't have any "extra" body parts. Still holding a figure, I "feel" it on an instinctual level that she is a woman, that instinctual level trips the alarm to question if she's a good mateprey. Spend energy to hunt? (y/n)

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 11 (view)

Do guys get scared away by too many emails? Posted: 5/5/2009 4:38:26 PM
I don't think you quite understand the "too many emails/phonecalls/texts" dilemma. At the beginning, I think you can get away with it. When you're with someone and the chase is no longer going on, it can get annoying. And most of what is said is asinine, and sometimes it's appreciated, and sometimes no response is necessary. For example, I'm at work: "What time do you get off work?" (Same time as every day) 2 hours later "I just called to see what you were up to." (I'm working, I'll see you in a few hours. Plus, there's no substance to the conversation.) 2 hours later a text comes in "I can't wait to see you!" I smile, and put the phone back in my pocket. Then she's upset because I didn't respond. That kind of scenario is what I'm referring to as "too much contact", and I'm not sure how to handle it without being a jerk.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

Is this known to work??? Posted: 5/5/2009 4:32:47 PM
Is the effort honest or not? Is it just telling her what she wants to hear?

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

why is is that so many guys make their profiles so broad? Posted: 4/28/2009 9:47:21 PM
Why exclude? I'm not a woman, it's not my job to say no. It's my job to get them to say yes. THEN I'll figure out where to go from there.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 20 (view)

Is it true - men always want what they cannot have? Posted: 4/27/2009 11:47:04 PM
Nah, as the people on this forum can attest, I'm kind of abusive toward what I can't have.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

Which is the character of girls you admire and why you wanna date local? Posted: 4/23/2009 2:19:15 AM
The answer to your distance question is "their inside things". Talking is nice, but ultimately boring and frustrating. Eyes and body heat don't need words, and you can't get that from a distance. It's like only being able to enjoy a restaurant by looking through the window. Otherwise, I'm looking for someone who's attractive "enough", nice to me, and accepting of me.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 41 (view)

Women and Toilet Paper Posted: 4/22/2009 3:27:01 AM
I know what you mean. I'm highly thrifty with my TP apparently. I can make a 12 pack last about 4 months or longer. But if there's a woman there, it's about 1 roll every 2 days! (And complaints it's too soft.) I recommend learning efficiency. 2 squares, fold, wipe, repeat.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Are some men really this clueless.... Posted: 4/22/2009 12:16:21 AM
I too am tired of the "Dangerous serial killer" routine. (It's not flattering at all, and I have an itchy FU trigger finger these days) I understand the need for safety and feeling secure....ok, not completely, but so I hear and I'll just have to roll with it and respect it. Fine. But, if you don't like the date, you pick the spot. Too many planning for first dates, and not ONCE in my life have I ever gotten an alternate suggestion to my poor planning. Are women really this clueless?

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 11 (view)

here one minute and disappear w/no reason? Posted: 4/22/2009 12:07:21 AM
If I could give women ONE gift. Just one. It would be to understand and QUIT MISUNDERSTANDING AND MISINTERPRETING THE MALE SEX DRIVE!!!! Stop. Please. Or I'll type in caps again. Here's a hint. Where women are turned on because he turns her on with time and action and words and other horseshit that will never fully make sense to anyone.....guys are turned on by LOOKING AT YOU or thinking they have a shot. Yes, the idea that sex begets more desire for sex. Those 2 things are the biggest factors. They're turned OFF by how you act or if there's a threat. You should have learned this by 12, but 99% can't seem to wrap their mind around this tiny idea. Looks good? Attainable? Am I going to regret this? What's to regret?/I'm going to die. The rest she does are enhancements. Use this check list of 3 things, your answer is in there. (Psst, It's the attainable one) and when the female lets him know, in a nice way, that this is toooooo new to be thinking about that Yes, until you SHOW yourself, and give something to like, you're meat. What else is there to know? It's all he has to work with. Meat's good though, so don't knock it or turn it into a negative. Oh, if I could only translate that feeling, or put it in a box, you wouldn't say it with disgust. What's wrong with thinking about it? I don't think there are any guys who think "I sure would like to have sex with her. I'm totally disrespecting her! Let me find another guy so we can share this disrespect of her together, and then we could high-five!" He dropped innuendo. He found out you don't have a sense of humor like his, he moved on. Nothing worse than someone who doesn't get your jokes. If your sense of humor does match, you can joke back. The best girls I know are complete pigs, and typically beat me to the punch when it comes to an off the cuff dirty joke. (You know that asian hot sauce with the "rooster" on it? Yeah, we have a special name for it and it never gets old) So, if you follow where I'm going, I think he looked past the physical just fine and found a deep incompatibility.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 11 (view)

Why do men just disappear? Posted: 4/21/2009 10:51:24 PM
It's done. That's all you need to know. Would else do you need to know? I guess he COULD explain himself, but if he's anything like me, he doesn't take pleasure in making feel bad about themselves.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 21 (view)

Men and beds: The unmaking of a good night's sleep Posted: 4/21/2009 3:56:41 PM
I don't make my bed. And if I do, I don't tuck things in. I am not a sardine! The first thing I do at a hotel is untuck the sheets. I'm a burrito.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 8 (view)

Why keep the mustache from the 80's? Posted: 4/18/2009 2:37:33 PM
I will gladly help fight the mustache war, if you help with those who don't think they should have to lose weight to be attractive. I'll drag them to the barber, you drag them to the gym. Do we have a deal?

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 12 (view)

Why do guys say they feel less of a man when taking directions,orders, or anything from a female? Posted: 4/18/2009 2:02:16 PM
Trust is a 4 way road. There's giving trust, and there's FEELING trust. These are 2 different things. If a guy doesn't feel trusted, he can feel useless. THIS IS HUGE!!! Read it again if it didn't sink in. When you're questioning his behavior and telling him/insinuating he's doing it wrong, or doesn't know what he's doing, he doesn't feel trusted by you. Look, women like confidence. I don't know why. Your rule, not ours. But, we also like being a confided in, aka being trusted. I don't know why, our rule, not yours. So don't go shaking up the very thing you're interested in. And sometimes confidence is delusional. Sometimes we think we know exactly what we're doing, and are confident in ourselves.....even if it's not true. But if you can't believe in yourself, what can you believe in? So, even if we're lost, have some faith and trust that we know what we're doing. Suggestions are welcome. Commands better have a really good reason behind them.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

Why keep the mustache from the 80's? Posted: 4/18/2009 1:51:06 PM
What if you're a cop, or a firefighter? They'll totally lose all authority, and you wouldn't want them to be ineffective would you?

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

Boys please help me--- what am i doing wrong? Posted: 4/18/2009 1:32:24 PM
They were giving you their attention. Just not in the way you wanted it. Help them out and let them know how you work, what you like, and what the heck to do with you.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

Boys please help me--- what am i doing wrong? Posted: 4/18/2009 1:25:35 PM
First, apply logic to what you just said. There's a chain of events where one thing connects to the other. I'll start you off. guys are great but i just have not found the right one on here yet Ok, cool. could i get some ideas on what i am doing wrong What you're doing wrong is, you haven't found the right one yet. How is this your fault? If it is your fault, is there anything you can do to find the right one? what does a girl have to do to get your attention? Have you tried messaging the ones who you want to get to know? I think that would get their attention, or at least some of them. If you're under the assumption that men must contact women, this could be the flaw. You're leaving this up to fate instead of making your own destiny.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

Do guys prefer? Posted: 4/18/2009 12:25:33 PM
Do guys know you're available? I like this mix, I really do. But, they're all taken and "independent" and can take care of themselves. Blech. So, I'm going to go where I'm wanted and I think I have a chance. <--- There's my answer.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

how do guys define love? Posted: 4/17/2009 8:24:23 PM
It's a made up thing. No 2 loves are ever the same. But love makes you do crazy things. So, look for that. I say it's made up, because in reality, it's an addiction. It's an addiction, because you'd be quite disappointed if it were gone.

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 20 (view)

Tomboy VS Girly Girly Posted: 4/17/2009 6:11:15 PM
from what I've heard men say over the years is that a girly tomboy is a good thing, she's not afraid to get dirty, or rough it in the 'wild', she'll join the man in physical activities that many women would never attempt or want to do, she would still be feminine in appearance without being high-maintenance, but not compete with the man for who can bench press the most weight and who has the bigger muscles. Since the OP said "You can only pick one", I was disappointed. But this is my answer. She's not afraid of a dirt. As in actual dirt, a joke or a story. She's not afraid to gross me out to make me cringe and would laugh about it. She's not afraid to be raunchy in many aspects. And maybe, she understands and respects honor. I haven't found that honor is a respected trait when it comes to dating. But at the same time, I can't betray myself or my own code. Tomboys are easier to talk to, and easier to get along with. At the same thing, I like a lot of things that say "I'm feminine." If I HAD to pick, I'd go with the tomboy. I'm afraid the girly girl would be too irritating and confusing for me to deal with. In society, women can play both gender roles. But men cannot. So, play on my side of the court?

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 19 (view)

how long does take you men.tell women that you love her Posted: 4/17/2009 1:56:46 PM
When it's honest, and I'm aware of it myself. Until then, you're going to have to wait, question and wonder. Or I could BS and tell you what you want to hear. That seems to work best from my observations. <div class='quote'>He may not love you. Have you tried asking him if he does? Like backing him into a corner and making him answer the question? The best time to do this is if you're in the kitchen cutting vegetables with a large knife in your hand. "Do you love me, do you??"

ubkobalt

Joined: 5/7/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

Do men pay attention to / care about a woman's profession? Posted: 4/16/2009 11:41:32 PM
With a few exceptions (such as active military, escort, cult leader, etc.), I honestly don't care as long as she can support herself. Physically attractive, a kind attitude and personality, finds me worth being with. My list is short, but difficult to fulfill.

Show ALL Forums