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Thread: why is it not okay to dye my hair blue

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

why is it not okay to dye my hair blue Posted: 9/6/2008 11:23:32 PM
Okay, here in Australia, 'Blue Hair' is a sign of poverty as it originated from women using 'blue bags' to colour their hair when it started to lose its own colour or went white. Hence the name 'Blue rinse set', it was also popular for 'old' women to have a 'blue rinse' when having their weekly hair set in the 60's - late 90's? I haven't seen someone for ages with blue hair, except for the young one's with the bright shimmer blue colour. History of Blue bags; They were used by 'lower class' women who washed their own clothes in coppers or by hand to whiten their whites. Or, by women who took in washing to help the family income or to keep their family. Blue hair was like a sign of where you were in society, peroxide blondes were also labelled by their 'home dyed' hair. Parents have a problem with their kids changing their look. We made you perfect so why change perfection? You need to express yourself and of course changing hair colour, style etc., is the easiest and cheapest way of doing that. Suggestion: Why not meet your parents half way and have a blue streak/streaks put in your hair. I find this looks good and I would be regarded as being conservative with hair colour by my daughters. Told my youngest age 16.5 she was not allowed to colour her hair for 6 months, she told me to get real. Have your Mum go to the Hairdresser with you so she can be included in part of the process, this way she feels included, consulted and not left out. It can help to move your relationship from parent to child to parent of young adult. At the end of the day hair grows and colour likes/dislikes change as we grow. If Mum is still not keen then give her a second compromise, buy some blue hair extensions that you clip into your hair and ask her to put them in. This way she can still be part of the process and let your Dad know they come out. Some parents need to be taught how to let go of the tight rein a bit and it is better if you help them calmly and not arguing. Remember if you think your parents are stubborn etc., then so are you to them. Good luck.

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall..... Posted: 7/5/2008 7:20:03 PM
Self sufficient people are never seen as being in need as much as others is the conclusion I have come to in my life. Amazing how the price of the photocopier was more important than your being incapacitated. I have had probably more falls than needed. However, the pick yourself up and dust yourself off and start all over again has always been what I have done. My motto is actually "birds are singing, sun is shining, the world is still turning. So get up and get going". Just spent a week off work sick, no one rang or came over, managed to look after myself. Had a couple of scary moments when driving, head loaded with cotton wool and had sneezing fit. Take care

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 30 (view)

Do you REALLY want to meet someone? Posted: 7/5/2008 7:07:31 PM
Anyone in West Sydney interested in a POF get together????? When looking at Canadian POF those guys are all out and about meeting and having a good time. I don't do the 'crowded room of strangers' thing all that well. However, you just gotta do it sometimes to rattle your own cage and recognise you are still in the land of the living. My circle of friends has dropped to my neighbours cat and its staff/owner. The 'staff' is same age bracket as my kids. Everyone else has died, retired, moved away or can not afford to do things, pension poverty. I consider myself lucky as I work fulltime am healthy just seem to sit at home more than I need to.

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 68 (view)

why is there a stigma against single dads Posted: 7/5/2008 6:46:32 PM
Parents have a job to do for and with their children that does place the children in first place and this is to have their children feel safe, loved and accepted. Children need to be socialised into their family values and society so that they can be accepted by their peers and others without losing their uniqueness, this is what parents need to do. The child that is sick, hurting emotionally or just feels sad is the parents favourite and should receive all the love and care it requires. Gender has no absolute as to whom can perform these tasks it is the parent themselves who do them willingly and lovingly. My 2nd husband was a far better 'mother' than me and I have no problem admitting that. He had a daughter who came to live with us and unfortunately her mother kept interfering with our household by dismissing my parental role within my own home. This caused a lot of upset to the little person caught up in the middle. I am now a sole parent of my 3 adult children and they are 3 of the lovliest people I know, they came and still come first when they needed/need to be there. Me a good parent? No just one who keeps working at it as it is a lifetime project and juggling act. There is one thing I noticed missing from the above posts and this is something that is often overlooked. If the relationship does not work out/ last then the non-parent loses a whole family not just a spouse/partner as the children automatically go with their parent. And given the amount of children who have experienced this loss for a second or more time/s, then fear could be what has them cancelling out of getting to know single Dads/Mums? Cheers to all the single parents, male/female, fulltime/part-time

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 37 (view)

Inheritance Posted: 7/5/2008 6:08:49 PM
I wrote my will up last year and have divided it all equally between my 3 daughters. I don't own/buying my own home and have not been working long enough to have enough superannuation to 'retire' within the near future. However, on paper I am quite financially okay, just cannot retire. So if I retire from the Planet they will do quite well. So, whilst I am working I have chosen to travel overseas go on cruises etc., so that I can have some enjoyment before I leave the Planet. I was a Baby Boomer who heard 'spend, spend, spend and not save, save,save'. Bummer now. And to those who have recently lost a loved one my thoughts are with you.

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 32 (view)

Do I breakup with a guy who likes me but doesn't love me?? Posted: 6/20/2008 10:30:15 PM
Read the books suggested, do the cathartic writings, reset your 'self-talk' CD in your head with the help of a professional counsellor. It is very hard to make such a life changing thought and behaviour pattern on your own. You need to look at yourself as to where you developed this pattern of behaviour in a relationship, what psychological trigger occurs to have you go back after breaking up. For some it is the 'Honeymoon' period this is about 6 weeks in duration then normalcy comes back and it all goes downhill again. Merry-go-Round is another way of describing this type of relationship also. He was honest with you by saying he likes you but does not love you. He doesn't have to love you as you are 'there' and you don't interfere with his 'real love' Miss Alcohol. I wish you well and it takes practice to make behaviour changes.

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

Different twist on same old broken heart story Posted: 4/25/2008 6:30:34 PM
Much of what I have read here has been to the point as to your needing to move on. I would like to just put in my tuppence worth here. You have had a brief 'electric' romantic etc., of being 'in love' and you miss the excitement and angst it brought with it. Romeo and Juliette style breakups are hard as there is rarely closure. Accept the fact she is now gone and your memories will live on for as long as you want them too. However, don't let them shutter your eyes to the reality/possibility of finding a partner, love etc. If we 'fall in love' then we can also 'fall out of love'? It is our choice. Control freak fathers with daughters always make me feel uneasy about their (fathers) reasons/motivations.

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

confused Posted: 4/25/2008 6:14:50 PM
This is a sad place to be for you, especially if she keeps contact via looking at your profile. It appears to me that they have been dependent on each other for sometime now and this has created a co-dependency in their finances as well as emotional areas of their lives. Both have some 'growing up' to do and this will not happen until the daughter becomes involved in a relationship and Mum slips into just being 'her mother. Find someone who is emotionally available and ready to be in a relationship of equality for you both.

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Two Up Posted: 4/25/2008 5:52:50 PM
I grew up with two up being played regularly and just loved the atmosphere of sheer fun and enjoyment. I 'played' without betting, would have won a mozza if I had bet. Just as an aside when at Uni a Tutorial was held on gambling and its forms and how people become addicted. Hence the government controls being brought in plus taxes as we know. Two Up in its true form cannot be corrupted as it is a game of probability, it can only be 'Heads or Tails' and nothing in between. I do know of one bloke who mucked about with the Spinner Pennies and he was banned by word of mouth from any game in the state and this probably flowed over the borders as well. From memory I think Two Up started by using 3 Pennies and you had to get "Two Up" (Heads/Tails) to win. Gotta just love being an Aussie on Anzac Day it is the next day for some of us that it is painfull

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 19 (view)

going on a cruise Posted: 4/18/2008 9:10:39 PM
I did my first trip out of Australia and cruise last November on Pride of Hawaii. Loved it had a great time and I went on my own so my cabin was spacious for me. Enjoy everything and experience things you haven't done before. I went on a Helicopter Tour and it was great, worth every Aussie $. Have a great time and I have a friend in US whose son is Autistic so hope you raise lot's of US$'s for this worthy cause.

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 25 (view)

No more husbands, wives, girlfriends or boyfriends Posted: 4/18/2008 8:57:42 PM
I like your anology of 'gay'. End of day it is just words and it is how we use them in our daily life that gives them meaning. De facto wife/husband is simply "in fact married". The state and a religion were not involved in the union. Partner is so non-discript for me as it is a term used mostly by businesses as stated in an above post. This then begs this question for me; Are we moving away from 'love based' relationships to 'business based' relationships? PC has taken spontenaity out of our conversations as we are so busy trying to get the right word for the situation, conversation and where you are, who you are talking to so on and so on. I was taken to task because I referred to Firefighters as Firemen, I was not so nicely told "and Firewomen". I replied with "that I was allowed my 'socialisation period' lapses." If we all just accepted our differences the words we use would not mean anything.

1HappyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 42 (view)

LOW INCOME EARNERS Posted: 4/11/2008 3:52:16 AM
Folks, what th'????? Of course money matters. Old saying when poverty comes through the door love flies out the window. And in all honesty I don't think criticism should be put on the person putting the 'question' out there. I am female on a 'good' income and I was blocked because of my age AND all I wanted to say "love your profile, totally refreshing" go figure says me. Be less judgemental of others on this site, they are just like you and I trying to find their way through the maze of being alone and finding someone. AND the possibility of being alone until the last breath, very scarey for most.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 31 (view)

I'm Elmo Posted: 11/6/2007 6:00:25 PM
Me toooo Elmo bordering on Sponge Bob, quite accurate actually. Did a lot of these types of questionnaires when at Uni. I always come out in the same area as this one. Enjoyed this as I love Elmo and Cookie Monster.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

Coming over in November Posted: 9/28/2007 6:43:20 PM
Hi there, I have written up a blurb on the 'Introduce yourself forum' so apologies if you have already read it and I repeat myself here I am just sooooo excited about having my first overseas trip and 2 birthdays and seeing the Hawaiin Islands. Travelling on my own as my friends all got busy or broke (no spare cash). So if any of you POF people would like to catch up with me when I am stopping over in Honolulu before and after my Cruise or, when the ship is stopping over in Hawaii that would be great. If not, no worries. I look forward to enjoying your home and I will respect it as I do my own, I might be a little noisy with excitement but

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 30 (view)

Going to be in Honolulu for my birthday Posted: 9/28/2007 6:30:33 PM
Hi everyone, I am going to be flying to Honolulu from Australia on my 60th birthday and arrive 'on my 60th birthday' in November. The next day I then go on board a Cruise ship to go cruising around your beautifull Islands. I have looked up on the net about manners when there and to get an idea of what I can do whilst in Honolulu on a shoe string budget. This is my first time off Auzzie soil so am rather excited. Good part about it? Two birthdays one home and one away = 120 years in total. I will be doin' alright for my age!!!!! LOL

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 41 (view)

Your a man.....So what part don't you understand? Posted: 9/28/2007 2:22:19 AM
What we have here is the 'Post-feminist' man/child. Women say 'I love you' to make having casual sex 'okay'. Remember girls who 'sleep' around are labelled for it a male is still 'congratulated' for it. This man/child has confused every thing about having a relationship, sex and responsibility of what it means long term. I 'love you' only means something if you already know what it is by loving your self, as in looking after yourself responsibly. Girlfriend/boyfriend? Means different things to different people perhaps. My experience with the young people I work with it means 'exclusive' to each other. Personally I would advise 'relationship counselling' to him so he can get his head around this whole situation. He is only 20 years old and his full development of decision making/brain development is still 6 years away. Good male role modelling and advice is what he needs not condemnation for doing what comes naturally. And those of us who have lived a life know it takes two to tango. DNA testing whilst may appear 'tacky' to some is sensible in the long term for all concerned. And most of all don't sit in judgement of this young man he needs honest advice and support.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 22 (view)

My girlfriend's best friend is a guy Posted: 9/23/2007 12:05:28 AM
Hi there, had similar problem with myself. In the end I realised I did not want the boyfriend wanted the 'friend' I could not have. So broke off with boyfriend and moved on from both, still see 'friend' about once every 2 years. Boyfriend married soon after breakup. You need to really talk to her as since he is not happy with you being in her life and she drops your hand when he is around then he has some connection with her more than just friends. It sounds like she is okay with the friend thing as she has no concerns when you see them together. However it is a triangle and you need to invest your emotions where they will be looked after and cared about. Talk to her about what you feel and if she understands then she will respect your wishes and not be as involved with her 'best friend' which is usually the norm any way. Good luck.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

Sydney Drinks? Posted: 9/21/2007 5:07:31 PM
Sounds good as long as it is not in November, going over seas. Sydney CBD or Suburb? I live out Penrith way so travel time etc., is a concern not a deterrent though. Commence late afternoon 4pm? so people can come and go as it suits them and their schedule?

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 25 (view)

harry potter - C'mon ya muggles tell us what ya think Posted: 9/21/2007 5:02:39 PM
I haven't read the books, saving that up for when the whole series is complete and can buy full matching set. Have seen all the movies twice plus and soooooo loved them. Is this a young person writing this? Yep, a young soon to be 60 year old. I too am sad to think that Harry Potter will not take over Hogwarts down the track and son of Hagrid will take over the position of his minder. And so my imagination goes. This muggle just loves the escapism of magic and wonder of the possibilities Harry Potter allows and opens us for us to explore within.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 429 (view)

Long hair on older women Posted: 6/11/2007 5:54:10 PM
I have had long and short hair all my life, having it cut off when I was a kid was a type of punishment. So have followed that routine up until I went to a hairdresser who was Continental and very expensive to have colour and style, at the end of it he was showing the different ways I can wear my hair and when he pulled it back behind my ears he said " Oh no, your lines are too harsh". So let hair grow basically to hide behind, then had it cut short when in an unhappy time of life, hated it and so back to growing it. I now have blonde (dyed of course) hair halfway down my back and there is no way I will go short again. I have a weak natural curl so when I put my hair up damp I have curls on my crown which gives a 'classy look' for special occasions with very little bother. I grow it, style it etc., for me, if it is liked by others then that is a bonus if not, their problem. Age is a state of mind I am actually younger in my outlook on life now than when I was 'young'. Hair length had very little to do with it

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 27 (view)

Glass Half Full / Half Empty Posted: 6/11/2007 5:36:11 PM
Hi DevineDene, I so liked your last Coelho quote. I have just spent my long weekend at home alone in my jim jam's (pyjama's etc.) feeling just a tad sorry for myself re being alone. Now it is Tuesday morning have given myself a good talking too, taken day off work to attend to some things and now have read a quote that has really rattled my chain. Thank you Being a Sagittarius I always have a half full glass, if empty, fill er up again. I would like to meet someone however, those that do contact me are always asking the questions "what do you want? and what about Sex?" and we haven't even met or it has been within 3 minutes of first meeting conversation. I run a mile like a frightened Brumby as I don't know how to answer "What do you want?" and any reasonable adult (in my view) who is looking for a meaningfull relationship would recognise that if happy together, a sexual relationship is a natural progression. I might be wrong?????? Have a good day everyone and keep your glass half full, that way no one ever knows how much you have had to drink.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 33 (view)

Happy Easter Everyone. Posted: 4/5/2007 6:35:16 PM
A Big 'HOPPY' Easter to everyone. I agree sarah re driving this time of year, just too risky/scary for me so I stay indoors or walk. And may the Easter Bilby bring lot's of yummy chocolate to your house on Sunday people.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 36 (view)

women in uniform Posted: 3/31/2007 11:54:43 PM
If you saw the uniform the women where I work have to wear you would get over it in a second. No matter whether they have a 'perfect' figure or not, the uniform makes them look like a sack of potatoes tied up around the middle. Not a good look.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

Any Kiss fans here Posted: 3/31/2007 11:23:56 PM
Yes, not a fanatical fan just like their music, love the makeup. Since their music came down under to Oz. The drummer. Not sure I could do the height of the platform shoes, scary. Hopeless with names, sorry If you ain't rock'n'rollin' all night and partyin' everyday. You just ain't livin

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

Hello! Posted: 3/31/2007 11:13:45 PM
Cooooeeee mate from down under in Oz. Welcome to POF and hope you find what you are looking for.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

hello from iowa Posted: 3/31/2007 11:05:34 PM
Hi Alan, I'm sorry you are experiencing such a painfull time in your life. It does get better and by coming here is a start. I agree with mandrake48 and if you find you need some outlet other than your friends you can contact me. No advice given, just lot's of 'listening' via e mails, I live in Australia and I am just offering a hand in friendship to you. Take care and chin up.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 14 (view)

Is no one into jst making friends anymore??? Posted: 3/31/2007 10:55:04 PM
Hi from Australia, I bought my laptop so I could have more than TV to entertain me of a night, live alone, no cat, dog or budgie for company. Well, trying to get someone to be friends and to have them write back to me has been difficult to say the least. I do have a couple of e mail friends in Canada and I have really enjoyed finding out about their beautifull country whilst sharing with them about Oz. So if someone wants to contact me, feel free.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 38 (view)

whats your worst fear Posted: 3/31/2007 10:31:01 PM
1/Retiring, don't have enough Super to keep me in the manner I have got used to. 2/Having the kids ask if they can come back and live with me, Eeeeeeeek. 3/Me having to move in with one of my kids, double Eeeeeeeek. 4/My kids picking my Nursing Home 5/Not being able to dial for help if needed. 6/Losing my memory. 7/Losing my sense of humour . 8/Losing the 'one with the most shoes wins' competition. (Imelda not part of it) 9/Losing my eyesight, would miss the 'eye candy' males. 10/Leaving the Planet without telling my kids 'I love them' for the umpteenth time. Whatever our fears are they are ours and someone else has exactly the same one's.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

A view of the American Empire in decline Posted: 3/31/2007 10:10:01 PM
Interesting point of view, think it may rattle some people's cages though. When at Uni a similar Academic discussion took place as this. Guess it is a case of 'wait and see' and hope the planet survives in the meantime.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 41 (view)

What Guys like and dislike in womens profiles Posted: 3/31/2007 9:08:08 PM
Me too, re the young 20-30 somethings contact, I politely inform them I am not interested in meeting anyone younger than my youngest child. And they still try to get me to make contact. Another peeve of mine is you just start e mailing or first meeting and I have to answer there and then whether "sex" is going to be part of a relationship. Hello fella's if we click with chemistry then isn't this part of a relationship? The other question that causes me consternation is "What are you looking for?" Obviously a compatible male!!!!! Tongue in cheek here fella's.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

Introducing myself Posted: 3/31/2007 12:22:53 AM
Hi safireBLUE, I come on site also to get into the forums. They can become quite 'interesting' for want of another expression. Hope you enjoy travelling the forum thread road. Kat

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 38 (view)

What Guys like and dislike in womens profiles Posted: 3/31/2007 12:17:04 AM
Whoa, is this ever a 'testy topic'. I don't have a picture on my profile and I explain why, my area of employment and I don't apologise for wanting someone over a certain height. We should all be allowed to have preferences rather than meet someone and they see 'the look' on the other persons face. A friend and I went to a Red Cross Baby Boomers Ball some years ago, my blind date was within my height preference with me in high heels around 6'. My friends blind date was about 2" shorter than her in high heels (5') and the look on her face was total shock. So it is not just us tall girls who have height preferences. My preference of the man being taller came from my first serious boyfriend, we were about the same height until I put on (flat) shoes and he would constantly make comments about my 'wanting' to be taller than him. I tend to take what people have written at face value as it can be quite daunting for someone who is (possibly) learning to navigate around a keyboard, being on their own maybe for the first time and entering the 'brave' new world of 'cyber' dating. I work Mon-Fri and sometimes on weekends and so I don't have the luxury of time to contemplate my navel too often. So I guess this philosophy flows over to reading profiles, I answer those who contact me, even if it is to give a polite not interested. Question: Why do people put a picture on that is of an animal, cartoon or that far away you can not distinguishe whether they are a 'Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie'? I prefer the 'ghost' picture to them.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 88 (view)

If the U.S. sucks, where should one move? Posted: 3/16/2007 7:45:27 PM
Hi people, I am Auzzie born and bred and looking at taking my first trip outside of Aust later this year. I can not imagine living anywhere but here, you can choose to go down to the snow in Winter for a weekends skiing and then head off up north for a weekend water skiing. We are truly blessed with our climate, global warming and all. Mind you we complain about our cost of living, petrol pricing etc., how Political correctness has gone mad the bloke next door mowing his grass to early Sund'y mornin', nothun to do with the few beers Sat night?????? LOL All things considered, we still have it pretty good here. We just have to get our young people born here of parents who migrated to Aust, to understand that Australia is their homeland and their parents cultural backgound is what they inherited from them. Not the troubles or fights that their parents left behind to make Australia home. Feel free to contact me re my one eyed view of Australia, gotta love it mate.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 47 (view)

Working with stupid people Posted: 3/16/2007 7:13:35 PM
Aren't we all glad our four footed furry/hairy and most feathered friends can't talk???? And being a semi-rural raised girl I have seen 'cow's revenge' in action lol I am in agreeance that these forums are a way of getting stuff 'out there' and it allows others to help us gain perspective through their responses. And I 'fess up, I have been the 'stupid' person on more than one occasion. I dye my hair blonde so others ask if I am having a 'blonde' moment? Sorry to all the lovely blonde people out there.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 34 (view)

Working with stupid people - Urban legend?!?! - NO WAY!!!!! Posted: 3/3/2007 9:12:49 PM
Argento you have a whole comedy sketch in your post, I could not stop laughing. Good luck in your new position.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 24 (view)

r u an organ donor? Posted: 3/2/2007 5:58:05 PM
Yes and have been for years, my daughters who live NSW are donors also. We have a firm belief that if we can help another or several people through our death then we have given a very special gift. This is a very personal choice area and there is no right or wrong answer. My belief system is that I have left the vessel I walked on earth with, since I no longer need it on my next journey let it help those still living within bodies that need assistance.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 17 (view)

Billy Thorpe .. has reached his rainbow Posted: 3/2/2007 5:46:48 PM
I feel like I have lost a good friend from my teens. I used to copy how he danced sing (which I can't) along to his songs swoon at the possible thought of 'seeing' him. If he came to Melbourne and I was allowed out. Usually sat at home watching snippets here and there of his concerts. The fact he was just a little older than me and appeared to be in good health, can not believe we will not see him playing again. Thanks for the energy and the memories Billy Thorpe.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 33 (view)

Why do women fell worthless after sex??? Posted: 3/2/2007 5:41:01 PM
So true sungold. Remember the days of when the Bride had to get married? Cost and Reward, hopefully it was reward for both. However, we all know that for many it wasn't. I have felt 'worthless after sex' when married so it is not always associated with one night stands, casual relationships etc. And I think there are times when men have experienced same or similar. Human nature is human nature. Re the article, rather Caveman style of meeting/mating me thinks. Most females who were not influenced by alcohol would see through these methods. One has to feel sorry for the genuine girl who is not experienced in the 'Night scene' of males on the 'hunt'. It is this one who will feel worthless after sex especially if it is their first time. Oh and this method is not just used on the young women it is also used on the older single women who become flattered with the attention. Vulnerability is what they rely on. Feel good about yourself always and in every way is a decision by us not the behaviour of someone else.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 30 (view)

Working with stupid people Posted: 3/2/2007 5:13:10 PM
The person that is honestly stupid will leave you agape as you know they do not have the capacity to 'see' their stupidity. The stupid person that you know is not stupid at all is the toxic work colleague. My experience past and recent with one colleague who has been considered as 'potential' Managment Material was my Supervisor for 4 weeks over Dec/Jan period this year. From day 1 she started in on me and was determined to do what she had done in the past to me. Have me go off on stress leave and then fight for being able to go back to my position. Didn't happen this time as in her state of stupidity she put in what should have been a damaging report on me, if proven I could have been put off without pay whilst investigated. I had to submit a report to Gen Manager. I had not done what she accused me of and had 2 page report to illustrate this fact. Gen Manager not happy. So what did she do whilst 'back peddling'? Made me the cause of why and Gen Manager misinterpreting her report.?????? I have come out looking good and she is trying to recover lost ground. I have made my feelings very clear that if she ever sits in the Manager chair of my section a letter of no confidence of working in a OH&S personal development non-discriminatory environment. Best of all I was heard by Senior Management. I have informed those who need to know I will not work with this person, I have stopped going to communal lunch room when she is there and I only offer 'work etiquette' to her she does not deserve 'professional' as she is not in my opinion. And I do not talk to her in any way shape or form outside of absolute work related issues. Guess who has been trying to get me to talk to them, who now dresses better and has stopped using vulgar language and yelling out like she is selling fish in a fishmarket? Yep her. Worse than stupid is the 'toxic' co-worker. Sorry so long people it is still making me so angry.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 14 (view)

Bereaved Parants Posted: 1/28/2007 6:36:12 PM
It has been 32 years since my one and only son died and the pain is still there. I miss my hopes and dreams of him as much today as the day he died. Never seeing him become a man, choose a partner, have children, be an Uncle and the list just goes on. When I am asked "how many children I have?" I say I've had 4, 1 boy 3 girls and I have a step-daughter, any additional information is usually only given if asked. When the natural order is altered by the death of a child/baby it is the most difficult to come to terms with. Loss of an older person who we share history with have left us with memories we treasure and hold in our heart. When it is a child, whether it is ours by blood or by love, we are making memories with them for them to keep for when we are not here. Loss of a baby/child is the loss of hopes and dreams, never to share good or bad times with them, see them grow and reach their full potential in adulthood and all the other things that make up a life that has been shared. Always loved and forever alive in our heart.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 11 (view)

Curfews for Children Posted: 1/5/2007 5:58:28 AM
Look back into history and you will see little has changed in this area except it is not allowed to go about beating kids up, well in public anyway. There is still domestic violence happening as ever before towards children and spouses, female and male. Curfews and the reporting of them are as the media and politics dictate we should know about them. How much we should know and why we should know it. Lower socio-economic areas are those shown to 'highlight' the ills of society and the breakdown of 'good, honest family values'. Sorry don't buy it. I have seen children from 'well off' families being treated like they don't exist. And then I have seen families who are scratching to make ends meet who care for their children as the precious gifts they are. Governments will never be able to balance these issues out as the individual within society will figure out how to make it work for them???????? There are no easy answers and never will be, human nature and the concept of freewill of the individual is the variables that can not be fully calculated to a scale or formula. I too thank my lucky stars that my children have grown into fully functional and nice people despite my mistakes and foibles of being their mother.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 21 (view)

resolutions Posted: 1/5/2007 5:23:48 AM
Resolutions? I can not ever remember making any at anytime in my life. Think I recognised I liked to live here and now with an idea of what I would possibly do in the future. Also, I can remember a friend making a New Year resolution and did not achieve it and they just lost the plot, scary? I prefer to have a plan and a plan B and a plan C and a plan...... You get the idea. Lose weight? That is a daily perrenial aspiration for me so no point making that a resolution. I simply want to live this year with as much love and happiness my heart can hold and to share with those when their tank is running on low. Best wishes to everyone for 2007

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

happy new year Posted: 1/5/2007 5:11:42 AM
Actually I got the trifecta. Birthday was great (25/11), Christmas was great and had a great new Years Eve. All spent with my family and best friends. And since 2007 is the Year of the Fire Pig/Boar, it's all gold maaaaate, all gold. Not to mention my Western horoscope predictions. Hope 2007 brings you all what you wish yourself. etc.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 20 (view)

manners Posted: 12/9/2006 7:02:02 PM
Manners and ettiquette come in all shapes and forms and they are what is handed down to us as children to take with us as we travel through life. Knowing how to lay a table was very important in my family, "we may be poor we don't have to be ignorant too". Other family philosophies were "we may be poor, soap and water is cheap. Always say please and thankyou as they will get you everywhere you want to go in the world more so than money". And I know I have seen the rude and obnoxious 'rich' people who demand service with out any resemblance of manners to receive the absolute minimum requirement of service. Up against this are the people who say 'please and thankyou' who will receive service over and above the expected. So for me I guess the underlying message is what ettiquette is about, knowing how to lay the table, use the right cutlery was about learning and developing oneself to the best you can be. Soap and water being cheap, keep yourself, clothes and home clean. Then anyone will be pleased to know you, sit next to you and visit you. Please and thank you to others is showing self respect as well as respect to others. From these humble beginnings I have been able to go anywhere, mix and talk with people from all walks of life. And I look forward to taking these values with me when I start travelling overseas.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 190 (view)

OK< a challenge on the weight thing.... Posted: 11/25/2006 11:24:53 PM
I have read quite a lot of the comments here as well as the original one that kicked it off. When we are young we have an inbuilt psychological profile of what the father/mother of our children should be so all of their physical attributes and their traits are on par with ours. It is about recognisable kinship. As we develop and having children is not part of the 'search' process then the logic/analytical processes kick in. Will he/she be able to fit in my life, will I be able to fit into their's? Best friend, companionship, intimacy become important. As does what attracts us physically does not wane, so accept it is all we can do. Body size shape, one person described her Grandfather and father beautifully and so that is the measure she uses to follow when meeting men. Go Girl. Expectations are the worst of what we place on ourselves, we expect to meet someone who will accept us as we are. Mmmmmm, can we give the same back appears to be the debate here. And I am one of those who do not have a picture on view, my choice due to my employment. My size, buxom thanks to my European background, Aussie clothes size 14-16. I have no problem with men wanting to know me etc., from my physical self. They have a problem with my being independent, thinking for myself, not wanting to retire etc. I have made a friend overseas and whilst I enjoy the chats etc., I have had to be very definite that there is no physical attraction on my part. This upset him as he liked my picture, yes I send one if I am sure the person has good values. However, I was clear about it at the outset of us chatting and prior to sending my photo. I do not think photo's and words can constitute a relationship it can only offer a knowledge base that should take the awkwardness out of the first meeting. And not all the photo's I have seen on line fella's are recent or match the age given. Mmmmmmm? Perhaps, it is an innate need to be seen as we like others to see us as it is how we 'see ourselves'. We are all unique individuals trying to look after ourselves to be as healthy as we can, recognise we all have faults and foibles that add to our uniqueness. And if we are all working on trying to be better people, trying to look after our planet and trying to be tolerant of others then we are not doing too badly at the end of the day. Just a few thoughts from 'down under' and Cap'n I would have you laughing that much I'd have yer shiverin yer timbers, mate.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 20 (view)

life an love Posted: 11/25/2006 10:29:51 PM
I think it is rather natural to swing between being okay alone with the independence of only having to think about your wants and needs and attending to them. To where we would like someone we can call and talk to, be invited out for dinner, shows etc., comfortable companionship.To where we would like the enjoyment of it all 24/7, with a best friend, lover etc. It is finding the balance for me that is difficult. Most men my age are looking at retiring, I'm looking at working overseas, doing a law degree, travel and buy my first home. Not necessarily in that order. And of course lose those extra kilo's

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 127 (view)

Vacationing Solo Posted: 11/4/2006 6:35:30 PM
I am so glad I stumbled onto this forum, I intend to start travelling alone over the next 12 months. Just got my first passport and can not wait to get the first out of Aust stamp in it. I am a social person and find it easy to start conversations with strangers, have even had conversations with people who have no English. Guess it is the self safety first that needs to be in full play when travelling alone. "If it don't feel right then it ain't". My youngest daughter and her best friend went on a cruise together, friendship has been all down hill since. Haven't talked for a couple of years now. So guess if you go alone you get to keep your friends is the moral here? I wish you a boomer of a trip, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 13 (view)

old davey suzuki Posted: 11/4/2006 5:57:25 PM
I have seen David Suzuki a few times on TV and find his 'talks' to be inspiring and frightening at the same time. Inspiring because he does not just criticise what is happening to our Planet. He offers reasonable and logical solutions inclusive of Governments and business to incorporate changes. When we hear even if everything stopped going up into the atmosphere it would still be 30 years to take effect, frightens me for the future generations. The unsettling information in his last address that I heard was on the Tasmanian Salmon Farming Industry. I always try to buy Australian and love smoked salmon, not any more unless I can be sure it is 'wild' salmon. And what of the other ocean sea food Farms? are they too doing same? I chat with a friend in Canada and he says they call David 'Chicken Little' over there as the sky is always 'falling'. How sad is that? Since it is the ABC and SBS who mostly show his talks, his messages do not reach the majority of the population. Is ignorance bliss in this case for Governments and big business? Chernobyl and the surrounding areas have not had enough world attention in my opinion to make us all aware of the importance of how easy it is for humanity to be wiped out/affected. And that Goverments and big business neglected to keep safety of there up to scratch. And neglected to recognise what they were introducing into the ordinary persons life and death sphere until it happened. Just my thoughts.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 27 (view)

when do you stop looking? Posted: 10/1/2006 11:24:28 PM
Hi there, hope you don't mind an Aussie jumping on your Forum. I love the fact I can travel the world via this medium. Wow, I never thought about still being on dating sites if you were to meet someone, that really is an important consideration. I have made friends on line and love the Forums, just never stopped to consider what staying on line would mean if I met someone. Agree with the "if you meet someone then commit to that relationship". And I have had the "I'll just go over and rescue my mate and I'll catch up with you later" at a singles dance. We had chatted long enough for a/ can we join you at your table? or, b/ do you want to join us ? I said "okay, catch you later" I finished my drink, laughed and went back down stairs to where my friends were. He and his mate come down stairs sometime later on their own, looking. I saw him, waved and turned my back as I am no last chance dance. This type of person male or female can cause people who are not okay in their own skin to feel even worse about themselves.

MiffyKat

Joined: 5/24/2006

Msg: 32 (view)

How do you feel about age differences? Posted: 9/30/2006 7:11:00 PM
I have a rule of thumb, do not date etc., men same age or younger than my kids. I work full time and will be doing so for many more years. Most men around my age are ready to buy the 4 wheel drive and Caravan and do the 'travel round Australia' thing. And many are set in their ways and thinking which causes arguments for them discussions for me. Many Aussie men in my age bracket still consider Sheila's (females) should agree with them and not have an original thought in their head. I never fitted into that category and no chance now. I find men in their mid to late 40's have more idea about where I am in the world. However, they are interested in females younger than them.

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