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wsrfr33

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

race (national origin) Posted: 5/17/2008 9:12:14 PM
Should there be a selection (if there isn't already one) for race preference (national origin) ? I know there are some women who strongly prefer to date within their own race and some who simply aren't interested at all in dating men of other races, period. Same goes for some men. So how about it? They could put it in their profile, but so far none that I have seen do. Yet nearly all dating sites have that option for their users.

wsrfr33

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 30 (view)

What do you think about POF get-togethers? A survey Posted: 3/21/2008 2:32:51 PM
I think it would be a great idea..as long as I don't have to travel a hundred miles to get to one.

wsrfr33

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 29 (view)

Northern Cali vs Southern Cali.... Posted: 3/21/2008 2:31:24 PM
Well I don't know which part of N.CA you are talking about but there are typically parties (although not affiliated with this site) all the time in the SF bay area. Just do a search. I would, though, like to see a POF party in the bay area sometime. Maybe I'm asleep at the wheel. I don't know.

wsrfr33

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 96 (view)

When is it OK to cheat? Posted: 3/21/2008 2:28:00 PM
Its not and I don't care what the circumstances are. If you feel the need to cheat, then you should be single and/or using your hand and if you are doing the latter then you really need to work on your relationship. The only possible exception is if one of you is on a business trip for several days. This goes for both sexes, not just guys. That is blunt but the way I feel personally. Guess I am a little old fashion. Just ask Elliot Spitzer how it feels..and he has a great looking wife. I'll bet he wishes he used more restraint and/or a sex tool now. Some guys got it all and they still mess up. I think the power goes to their head..or maybe penis.

wsrfr33

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 382 (view)

Do women like the taste of a mans semen? Posted: 3/21/2008 2:14:01 PM
I don't know and don't really want to know....it sounds digusting to me actually. I have an idea...why don't one of you guys taste your own semen and then you'll have an idea of whether women might like it. I wouldn't even consider doing it myself.

wsrfr33

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

can anyone give me there opinion on my profile Posted: 3/17/2008 10:54:08 AM
Hey Bud, I know what you mean. I get some of those too. Maybe more than some. I come here just to casually browse and I don't get too serious or write 10 women or more a day. Too much competition and work for me! And I am looking mainly for local ladies. The long distance thing is not for me. Been there, done that. I KNOW I don't post a very good profile. All I have to do is to read others. I could put lots of effort into it and make it really sparkle and seem exciting, etc. But I don't think that is me. I'm not Mr. Excitement and I sure the heck don't look like I could grace the cover of GQ. Ok, so this is starting to sound like a profile so I will cut it short. Composing a profile to me is sort of like making out a resume..the only difference is that you want to catch the attention of ladies, and not employers. I suggest you leave out anything that sounds REMOTELY negative. Nobody wants to read negative, self denigrating comments about you. You can be honest and still not be negative. Post some GOOD picS of yourself like the ladies do. Don't limit yourself to writing just the pretty ones cuz ALL the other guys are doing the same thing! Somewhere on this site or maybe it was another it was said that guys who write a good, complete, profile get the most mail, so if your's is short or leaves a lot of guessing, then fill in the blanks and use good grammar. You know, going out with a lady you meet on this (or any other site) is sort of like going out on a date that someone sets you up with. It makes my spine shiver. Shoot, even talking on the phone for the first time makes me nervous. I'm not one of those guys who have the gift of blab. Have some (more than one) women (either here or your own friends) proofread your revised profile and comment AND look at your pics. You have heard people say "you don't get a second chance to make a first impression". I think there is some truth to that and your profile and pics is the first impression that you make. Ok...I think I have said enough...maybe more than enough. Good luck and hang in there!

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 95 (view)

Average or a Few Extra Pounds? Posted: 6/7/2007 8:39:35 PM
What IS " a few extra pounds" and what is "avg"? Aren't most american's overweight to a certain degree? I hear even teenagers are overweight and some are obese. I would bet that more than half of the people who contribute to this form could lose a few pounds. So in my opinion, "average" is a few extra pounds. Apparently web site owners don't agree or realize this. There is my 2 cents.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

What is too old to have never experienced love?? Posted: 6/7/2007 8:28:21 PM
I must be a late bloomer because I was far older than 23 before I felt I had fallen in love.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 80 (view)

Can a casual comment instantly turn you off? Posted: 6/7/2007 8:26:39 PM
It is particularly crucial when you first meet. All it takes is something sort of insignificant and they are instantly turned off. It seems like you can't even be yourself w/o running the risk of someone losing interest. It is almost like judging someone solely on their looks without finding out what they are like on the inside. I try not to judge anyone on any one thing they say unless I consider it really serious. Even happily married people have differences of opinion on certain things. I think it's virtually impossible to find a partner who likes everything the other person does and feels the same way on everything that the other person feels.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 57 (view)

How do you know if you have met the one Posted: 6/6/2007 8:10:46 PM
In my experience, it could happen right away and other times it will take time to develop. I think you will know it when it happens. I have had the same experience with women I did not pursue; did I let her slip away unwittingly? I was contacted by a lady in Seattle, Washington while I was living in S.CA. She "found" me on craigslist. I couldn't believe it; it was out of nowhere. But we talked a lot everynight and I thought she might be "the one". But she wanted me to move up there and I really didn't want to. Guess I should have. Might have had a nice relationship right now. I heard once that you meet that special person only a few times in a lifetime. I hope that isn't true cuz I certainly have blown some good prospects.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 154 (view)

How should a very fit 40 year old dress? Posted: 5/20/2007 10:38:02 PM
Not like a 20 or 30year old. I think 35 is about the limit for me for showing a lot of skin, regardless of your shape. Women can still show off their figure with more conservative clothing. The women who frown upon it are probably jealous...or just more conservative.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 190 (view)

Guy I met online keeps asking for money Posted: 5/20/2007 10:19:46 PM
I must get at least 2 e-mails of this type every month. Promises of lots of dough. I am going to have to figure out how to divert these types to the trash bin. Seems like a different e-mail address each time.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 29 (view)

Manic, Obsessive, Bi-polar X trying to break up a good thing. Posted: 1/4/2007 9:14:13 PM
I find out where he lives, stake it out, pull out my gun w/silencer,and take matters into my own hands. If this is unacceptable, I use plan b: I tell him over the phone that if he doesn't knock it off, I'll beat the shit out of him. If this is still unacceptable, I use plan c: I tell the police. Nah, takes too long. I like plan a.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 89 (view)

Why don't men like to dress up for dates? Posted: 1/1/2007 7:38:26 PM
I almost always ditch the jeans and put on some slacks, a clean sport or dress shirt, and dressier shoes. Some of my dates have come dressed like they have been cleaning the bathroom..ratty jeans, worn out shoes, and a ragged out t-shirt. Seems they really didn't care how they looked. Those were short dates.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 32 (view)

How far would you travel to meet your date? Posted: 1/1/2007 7:31:01 PM
I wonder if I didn't already answer this question. Generally speaking, 1 hr is about it for me and it usually isn't a problem because if my dates live farther away than this, they agree to meet me half way or so so I almost never have to travel more than about 45 min.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 92 (view)

Match.com are irresponsible Posted: 12/30/2006 3:20:48 PM
Yes, I used match.com for a couple of years; though not lately. I recall that what you say is true; you don't get to communicate DIRECTLY without being a member. That is why I included my e-mail address and phone number with any e-mail I sent or received while I was a member. With the exception of this site, few things in life are free..right? I am sure it is not cheap to keep this site up and running. There are very few really useful sites that offer a service that is free. People don't generally put the time and effort into a site for the fun of it. People who use this site as a benchmark need to do a reality check I think. Ditto for eharmony.com, another paid site and probably catering more to the upper middle class, or at least the people who have money.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 30 (view)

what turns a guy on Posted: 12/30/2006 3:06:26 PM
I don't think you want MY response!

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 37 (view)

bizzare date Posted: 12/30/2006 11:26:05 AM
I think the last time I heard of this was about 10 years ago and still find it hard to believe. Maybe I am too sheltered

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 40 (view)

Why so pushy? Posted: 12/30/2006 11:08:26 AM
No you are not being silly; it sounds like they have an ulterior motive. I sure the hell wouldn't expect a lady to meet me after only 10 minutes on the phone and to ask a lady if she LIKES me after just a few minutes is almost laughable. So no, you are not being silly; not in my opinion.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 118 (view)

Racism Is Still Alive Posted: 12/30/2006 11:00:51 AM
People like that suck..and racism, at least among some people, is alive and well even though they may not blabber it to everyone all the time. Even people who seem to be open minded are often times closet racists. It takes all kinds...there are still narrow minded people in the world and there always will be. I am not going to make any generalizations about people who are WAY overweight. I don't think they enjoy being that way. I knew a guy who had a huge weight problem but he turned out to be one of my best friends. I went out of my way to help him on many occasions. He didn't own a car so I drive him practically anywhere he wants to go. I even drove him around in the pouring rain one time to find an apt (which he did find). He has a gland problem; must weigh around 300 pounds on a 5'5" frame. Ok, so enough about me and my friend... A "slight" weight problem is sometimes more than just "slight". It might be a slight problem to them, but 500# is not a slight problem, no matter how you dice it. Next time ask for a pic if the weight is important to you. If the guy declines or says he doesn't have one, ask him for one. There is really no excuse for not having pics of yourself IF you are serious about dating. Its like trying to sell a car without showing pics of it.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 71 (view)

What are your first date killers? What's a big no-no? Posted: 12/29/2006 7:36:39 PM
I think the others just about cover it.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 247 (view)

are all the guys on here looking for sex? Posted: 12/27/2006 10:32:13 PM
Hasn't this question been asked before? No, I don't think the ONLY thing guys are looking for is sex. But wait until summer. That is like saying the only thing women are looking for is a guy with money.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 37 (view)

I don't get it - why does he bother? Posted: 12/26/2006 7:06:57 PM
I don't like IM because for one thing, I am not a fast typist and the other person always seems to be faster than me. That happened to me a few months ago. She turned out to be one of those 100 words/minute type. I couldn't even READ as fast as she was typing so I asked her if we could just e-mail or talk. She agreed to that. Found out we really didn't have much in common but we are still friends. So I figure why not just talk.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 34 (view)

Has this ever happened to you? Posted: 12/24/2006 3:27:30 PM
Well it takes all kinds.....You ought to be proud of yourself.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 30 (view)

Cashiers being hit on Posted: 12/23/2006 9:05:54 AM
I never flirt with someone who is much younger than I am and I don't expect them to flirt with me to be honest. Most YOUNG (but still at least 21) don't want to date a guy old enough to be their father. I don't want them telling their friends that "this old guy was trying to flirt with me!" Cashiers are supposed to be friendly or at least cordial, so I generally think that 99% of them are just doing their job. Some female cashiers are really friendly and outgoing so it can be a little confusing, but most of the time a guy can tell unless they are brain dead. I figure that cashiers get hit on enough and I don't want to add to the stats. I NEVER flirt with married cashiers; that is unless they flirt with me. That doesn't seem to be a "problem" with me. I have been a cashier many times and I don't ever recall a lady flirting with me to be honest, but that was a very long time ago and they would probably have to pin me against the wall and smother me with kisses for me to realize they were interested. I'm probably a little bit brighter now, but probably not by miles.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 12 (view)

How do you interpret your date not being able to make eye contact? Posted: 12/22/2006 8:24:21 PM
1. he might feel intimidated 2. has low self esteem 3. just not into you I agree with the lady who posted these reasons. Could add a 4th one: shy. Of course that might be regarded as intimidated. I have been on a few dates that I was so intimidated that I could hardly look at my "date". But when she asked why I was not looking at her, I told her that I was pretty shy and felt intimidated. We found a way to break through that though.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 302 (view)

Does ignoring a guy really get his attention? Posted: 12/22/2006 8:16:33 PM
YES, it gets mine....it is a wake up call for me to move on.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 41 (view)

One word or one line responses to an e-mail, what does it mean? Posted: 12/22/2006 1:38:35 AM
Sounds more like a job interview. So I can sum it up in one sentence. Move on.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 14 (view)

First Impressions ..the first Date Posted: 12/22/2006 1:31:21 AM
I think it depends on the person. I don't think I would take someone to McDonald's, but I wouldn't send my Visa bill over the limit on the first date, just to make an impression. Just some place nice. I think if you hit it off with your date and have fun, and there is a second date, then you can go some place nicer. But if you feel you have to wine and dine and you really can't afford it, then maybe you are dating the wrong person. I am referring to one of my recent experiences..fun while it lasted but oh so expensive.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 17 (view)

Same ole faces keep appearing on dating sites...why? Posted: 12/21/2006 9:19:07 PM
Its like a club! I think some of those people are just comfirmed bachelors and bachelorettes; ,maybe they just don't know it yet. Maybe they don't get out enough. Maybe they are looking for the pot (of gold) at the end of the rainbow. Maybe they get a huge ego boost from the mail they get. I just don't know... BTW, I have seen some very attractive women and I wonder why THEY are using a dating website. I know a couple of attractive women at work, and they don't need a site. They have more than enough dates to choose from. I even asked one if they have used a dating website and she responded "are you kidding?..I don't need a site to get a date and I date twice a week...I could date even more often, but I need time to myself".

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 1069 (view)

Do You Men Read Our Whole Profiles? Posted: 12/21/2006 9:07:12 PM
I think most men look at the pics first. I do too. But if I don't really think we have much in common, then I generally don't even bother. But some guys go for it anyway..got nothing to lose except a couple of minutes typing out their response. Maybe you look a little toooo attractive. Just my opinion.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 302 (view)

interracial couples Posted: 12/20/2006 8:47:17 PM
Good question; I think it is conditioning by the media and society in general. Its probably the same reason why it is far more common to see an asian woman with a white man than an asian guy with a white lady. BTW, why are YOU interested in crossing the racial barrier?? Not that there is anything wrong with it; I just think you are swimming against the current, so to speak.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 109 (view)

the guys who fix things Posted: 11/24/2006 12:44:59 AM
I used to try to fix almost anything...and I just wouldn't give up...even when I knew the chances of really fixing that thing was going to be almost impossible. Now I am a LITTLE more sensible..if I think I can, then I will really try. I am pretty comfortable with handtools and I am mechanically inclined anyway, but I know my limitations. As Clint Eastwood used to say in his "Dirty Harry" movies, "Man's got to know his limitations". I pretty much know mine. Better to call an electrician for a complex wiring problem than to burn the house down!

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 95 (view)

What does my children come first mean to you? Posted: 11/1/2006 9:49:57 PM
I have run into this before but not with women who have 3 kids. Kids take up LOTS of time. Talking is one thing; actually walking the talk is another thing. Being a guy, I think I can relate to how this occurs. You meet this gorgeous lady who has 3 kids, you say you support and can handle it, and then when you do a reality check, you find yourself disappointed and upset when things don't go as planned. If a guy wants to be number 1, then I say pass...but if you are willing to be patient and try to work it out, then look at the prize. That is simply the way I look at it.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 23 (view)

Why are some guys nervous about meeting Posted: 10/20/2006 12:31:13 AM
Maybe because he doesn't look like the pic he has posted, but lets face it, it is unnerving to meet anyone you don't know, even if you have chatted several times.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

unusual flirting? Posted: 10/20/2006 12:26:47 AM
Women, what are your most unusual ways of flirting, if you have any?

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

married (and divorced) multiple times? Posted: 10/11/2006 11:19:13 PM
Could you get into a serious dating relationship with a person who has been married and divorced, say 4 or more times?? I have heard that the chances of a successful, lasting marriage drop significantly the more often people get married. Some people are obviously not marriage material and it also becomes more difficult to "change" as one becomes older and set in their ways.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 52 (view)

He wants to meet but never has time... Suggestions? Posted: 10/11/2006 10:22:43 AM
Ah...blow him off. Ya know the old saying "if someone wants to do something, they MAKE the time". He has to eat, so if he is unwilling (or unable) to meet you for a sandwich or whatever, then forget about him at least for now. Look around. I think he is just stringing you along. Women do this too. Come to think of it, so do employers.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 50 (view)

Would you let someone you met on the web stay at your place if they traveled far? Posted: 10/11/2006 10:16:59 AM
I would say that in general, no, unless you can lock up all your valuables. You just can't be too careful these days, and I don't think anybody can trust anyone after just a few hours of being on a date. It should be made clear from the beginning. I would not expect any women to let me stay at her place after just one date and vice-versa.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 142 (view)

who pays for dinner? Posted: 10/11/2006 1:46:59 AM
If this was a first date, and he asked you out, he pays. I don't know what the etiquette is if YOU ask him out; I would assume you would pay. I'd never expect the lady to pay for the first date (or cover the tip). This of course assumes it WAS a date and not just a meal between friends.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 43 (view)

Older Daters... Time to change? Posted: 10/11/2006 1:39:37 AM
Oh man, would I LOVE to be 21 again!! I would do EVERYTHING differently. I agree that is there is a generation gap but the older you get, the harder it is to "change". Personally I like my values and morals; some may be old fashioned, but that is just the way I am. I don't see the need to change actually. There are plenty of single women around my age and while I would love to have a young g/f, I don't feel it is realistic if the gap is 10 years or more. Some women like older guys, but I guess I'm not that lucky, and it is just as well, because I don't think those relationships last very long. Dating much younger women is not really a problem simply because I don't really bother anymore. I feel the gap is just a little too big and I feel like I am out of my "comfort zone".

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 31 (view)

Broken Fin Posted: 10/11/2006 1:15:47 AM
When I saw the title of this thread, I thought about my surfboard! LOL Ok, stupid joke. I have to agree that this is not the place for attacks. Save it for a different type of communication or better yet, just don't correspond anymore. Nobody needs insults or attacks.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

Have you ever really met someone at the supermarket? Posted: 10/11/2006 1:01:43 AM
Never happened to me either even though I hear it is a good place to meet women (or so some say) and most people do some shopping anyway. But I think there are much better places. I think singles events are still the best way. Some people think those are for losers, but I tend to disagree. Maybe they are more attractive to the over 40 crowd; I don't know. I have never been into the bar scene even though I read some time ago that it is one of the best places to meet singles.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 60 (view)

How many men have you met that wanted sex on 1st meet? Posted: 9/30/2006 11:06:19 AM
I NEVER expect sex on a first "meet" and I think guys who do are asking way to much too soon. That is unless they both want it.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 535 (view)

A Few Extra Pounds Posted: 9/28/2006 11:20:45 PM
I agree; what the heck is a "few extra pounds"? ..5, 10,15, or more?? I think most people are slightly overweight. I know I am. When I see that description I figure that that to mean more than just a "few"; like maybe a "few too many". That is why I usually insist on a recent full body pic and I will send the same. Otherwise it is just a waste of time for both people. Its like lying on a resume; sooner or later the truth will come out. I also notice that several people post multiple pics and that they look entirely different in one pic than they do in others. Maybe that good pic is a "few" years old. I don't know. Everyone wants to look young. Well almost everyone.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 231 (view)

Should women show cleavage on first date Posted: 9/28/2006 11:09:16 PM
Gardennut, As long as I don't have to support them!

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 225 (view)

Should women show cleavage on first date Posted: 9/27/2006 11:05:19 PM
Let me put it this way. If I had a teenage daughter going on a date, she was living at home, and she was dressed in something that showed cleavage, I would tell her to wear something more conservative. When she moves out of the house, she can wear anything she wants. But there is "tasteful" cleavage and "too much" of it. Just like the length of the skirt; there is short but acceptable and then there is waaaayyy too short. On a first date I prefer conservative, but that is just me. But what I don't like is toooo casual if we are going to a nice restaurant. What is too casual?? Jeans, a sloppy blouse, and flip flops.If we are going to some hamburger joint, then she CAN dress casually although I still would like her to look like she spent SOME time trying to make a good impression. That's all folks.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 129 (view)

Nice guys finish first sometimes.......but they just don't get laid a lot Posted: 9/27/2006 10:40:25 PM
I have some opinions on this, but right now it is "no comment"

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 62 (view)

The term out of your league...what in blue blazes is that all about??? Posted: 9/26/2006 10:09:04 PM
In a perfect world, no it doesn't make you a better person that the other person. But we do not live in a perfect world, and furthermore, we are human beings and not machines. So it DOES matter; equals tend to attract and that is why professionals tend to marry other professionals. It is not that they are materialistic, it is just human nature; you want someone like yourself.

wsrfr

Joined: 6/16/2006

Msg: 204 (view)

So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!! Posted: 9/26/2006 9:54:21 PM
Its too bad this happens and probably too often to both sexes. Guess it is just human nature to want to look better than a person really is. But if the guy posted an accurate pic and you weren't attracted to his looks but you had a really great time on the phone, would you still feel that there was not enough attraction for anything? That is one bad thing about online dating and I have heard that complaint over and over. Maybe you should tell other women who it is so they don't get fooled either.

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