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Thread: Calling all 40-60Something Males?

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 637 (view)

Calling all 40-60Something Males? Posted: 8/23/2007 6:30:03 PM
I think as women age elegance becomes more important than beauty and an elegant woman, no matter the age, will gain my attention. Well said, prof48. Elegance in both men and women is timeless, and covers a multitude of imperfections. A man in his 40's who portrays elegance is every bit as attractive and irresistably sexy as a man in his 60's. I think the perfect term is a "Renaissance Man". I've come to the conclusion, that there are very few of those around. The benefits of elegance are sensuality, genuine kindness, and the banishment of any kind of temper tantrum, and a great respect for everyone's dignity, including your own. Think about people such as Jackie Kennedy, Audrey Hepburn, Ricardo Montalban, Pierce Brosnan and even the fictional James Bond.... elegant people all. Crudity just doesn't cut it for me any more, and I find too much crudity in men - and women today. I think they've lost the art of subtlety, mystery, romance and putting themselves out to please the OTHER person, rather than just themselves. I guess all that makes me sound like an old-fashioned prude... which couldn't be further from the mark, but I do believe in values. That's what I test out when I am getting to know someone. A lack of values shows up right off the bat, no matter the age of the person.

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 263 (view)

Over 45 men wanting athletic women??? Posted: 3/18/2007 1:12:26 AM
Alright already - the "weight" thing has been carried on long enough! If you're not "athletic" then you're out of shape and fat. Enough said, we get your point! But let's throw something else into the equation. Just suppose you find that slim and trim person that you're physically attracted to, and their sense of humour makes your head spin, and their smile makes your heart beat faster..... and you go on a few hikes or canoe trips together and you're thinking you've found your soul mate. Then you get to know more about them and you find they have some real physical restrictions that can't necessarily be seen up front, but that can occasionally interfere with "normal" daily living. Like severe arthritis that allows one to have good days and bad days.... old back injuries that can lay you out flat for weeks on end... hereditary heart disease that doesn't allow you to go jogging or work up a sweat... whatever! Blessed by genetics, they're not fat, but they're not really into "physical fitness". Is that acceptable? What would you do if your physically fit soulmate had an accident and could no longer share your active lifestyle? Leave them at home while you seek a new partner to be active with? I think not. You've all been spouting off as if the physical attraction is the only thing you gauge a person by. But where the heart is concerned, I bet you'd make alot of allowances. After all, aren't we all just looking for someone that makes us feel good about being alive? Be careful people. One day a chubby someone might slip through your defences and overtake your better judgement... and your heart. Never say never.

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 252 (view)

Long hair on older women Posted: 3/16/2007 12:46:02 AM
Why do so many people say long hair is harder to take care of than short hair? When my hair was short (for most of my life), I slept in rollers (when I was single of course lol) or used a curling iron or hot rollers, in order to get it to fall the way I wanted it to - then loaded it with hair spray or mouse or gel to get it to stay that way. YUCK! Now it's truly wash and go hair, most of the time. Sure, the hair products cost more, and I have to purchase 2 boxes of colour if I do a major change, and make sure I condition it every time I shampoo. It also takes longer to rinse the shampoo and conditioner out of my hair, but we're talking moments, not hours. I usually blow-dry my bangs and give it a quick blow-dry while combing out the tangles while it's wet (believe it or not, it makes it a LOT easier to get the tangles out while blow-drying). I've gone both routes of NEVER using a blow dryer on my hair, or using a blow dryer to get out the bulk of the moister, then letting the rest dry naturally, and it hasn't made a bit of difference to the texture. Maybe I'm just lucky, but it's still very healthy looking and silky feeling. And THAT'S why I keep my hair long. I love the feel of it more than the looks of it. The guys at work threaten me if I even mention that I'm thinking of cutting my hair, and many customers comment on the beauty of it. It happens often enough, that it really gives my spirits a boost. So overall, it's good. I like it long, guys like it long, and strangers even like it long. Who am I to argue?

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 246 (view)

Over 45 men wanting athletic women??? Posted: 3/16/2007 12:11:36 AM
It all boils down to personal preference. There are plenty of men out there that aren't looking for athletic, and who don't give a rat's patooty what's on the outside, but love the heart, mind and soul of a woman. For myself, it's obvious I'm one of the "fat chicks". It's not something one can hide. But if you think I'm that way because I'm lazy or don't care about myself, then you need to expand your horizons, because those aren't the only reasons for an individual's size. That would be like me presuming that, because someone is THIN, they must take good care of themselves. HA! Like I've always said - Beauty is only skin deep, but UGLY goes all the way through! If you're into physical fitness, more power to you. But don't forget to exercise your brain and "heart", because WHO you are matters more than what you look like. However, being a normal, mentally healthy and wishful thinking woman, I enjoy beefcake as much as the next woman, so by all means men, display those muscles. I can always fantasize that you'd be so attracted to me for my mind, that you'd actually want to carry me off to bed lol

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

Oct 27 th -- POF Appreciation Halloween Party ! St Catharines! Posted: 10/21/2006 8:14:55 PM
Since it's just a short walk around the corner from me, I really should come. IF I get up enough nerve, I will. But no costume for me! When it comes to stuff like that, I'm a "bah humbug" sorta person.

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

DO WE OVER 60'S GET LEFT BEHIND? Posted: 8/26/2006 8:14:41 AM
lks42, I feel much like EastSideEddie does, only because I don't believe in love and romance any more. People aggravate the daylights outta me. That being said, I keep coming here for that very same reason. Most of the people surrounding me in real life, bug the crap outta me. As I've got older, my patience for the "foibles" of others has evaporated. I don't want to get close to any of them because I don't want someone who can just "drop by" if they're in the neighbourhood or someone who might become a clinging vine. I'm used to living alone, and I'm not sure I could tolerate being around ANYONE 24/7 and I certainly don't want someone taking up every weekend either. Here is safe. You can flirt and chat and maybe even talk on the phone... or meet....or NOT. But here you play by YOUR rules, and you need to make them clear before you ever go on to the next step. When you meet someone in person through your job, or at the laundromat, or wherever, it's difficult for me to just blatantly say to them "these are the rules", and the opportunity is lost. What can I say, I'm a wimp in person. lol Now.... back to the topic. Although I'm not in my 60's yet, it's fast approaching. And whatever the age, you have to make up your mind to NOT "go gently into that good night". If our profiles aren't getting noticed or responded to, then change it. Keep updating until you find the right combination of words and pics that works.

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

I need some wisdom please?? Posted: 8/20/2006 5:57:52 PM
Ahhh Honeypie: free counselling is something else. By all means continue. You know the Canadian government, they've cut us back on so many things, they're not going to keep people hanging on forever. Problem is they might try to cut you off before you feel you're ready. I'm sure you know, without having to be reminded, that you know yourself better than any doctor will ever know you, and only YOU know if what the counsellor is telling you pertains to you or not. You did the right thing by seeking help. Now that you've put a name to your situation, the best thing you can do for yourself is to read, read, read. Grab any articles/books you can find on the subject of co-dependancy.. there's ALOT of it out there. GOOGLE it. Educate yourself about the subject of co-dependancy and see if it really applies to you or if you're just going through the natural grieving process of a dead relationship. Grief also takes many forms and sometimes hits you when you least espect it. All the advice in the world won't help, though, unless you apply it to your situation. Tailor it to fit your needs if necessary. And good luck. We're all behind you.

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

I need some wisdom please?? Posted: 8/20/2006 5:25:57 PM
I'd trust Al-Anon before I'd trust a private counsellor any day... why on earth would people in private practice want you to get better? It would take away their livelihood. They just keep finding more and more "issues" that they will help you resolve. Then you might get to thinking that you're really screwed up, when you're just plain NORMAL! lol flsoldier gave good advice. Support groups like Al-Anon do great work, designed for your specific situation.

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

The Cracked Pot Posted: 8/20/2006 5:19:44 PM
ksue44... in quotation marks or not, it's a beautiful story with a great moral to it. Too few of those around these days.

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 30 (view)

Arthritis??? Posted: 8/20/2006 4:17:48 PM
Moonkist, out stories are similar. I tried to message you, as I'd like to learn more about the meds you're taking, but you're only accepting messages from people close by.... so I'll ask here. I was wondering what meds you took prior to the one you're having injected? I was taking Celebrex, but it only helped for a little while. Glucosamine/Chondroitin/MSM seem to have the most beneficial effects. I'm hoping to be able to find a more conventional med to help more with the pain. The joints at least are working again now, but the pain level has kicked up again. Of course I know when I go to the doc, she's going to send me to the rheumatologist again, which will probably take 3 or 4 months to get in to see him. But you're right about the "making love" part. I never seemed to notice the pain then. I'm just afraid because it's been so long now, since I experienced that particular pain-killer, that I might get addicted if it ever comes my way. lol

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 30 (view)

Addicted to looking? Posted: 8/20/2006 4:02:21 PM
Oldsock, I do think you have a point that we see all the same profiles in just about every site. I know myself, I've posted on many over the years. Unfortunately, I guess I just don't make a good first impression, 'cause I've never met anyone on any of the sites. I've had a few emails, but they fizzled out before we ever met... so we didn't meet. lol Oh jeepers... could I be addicted to rejection?? gasp (methinks I'd better give that some thought.) But as several have said, I definitely enjoy the forums, and this one has got to be one of the best threads in recent days.

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 89 (view)

Photos and the older person! Posted: 8/19/2006 6:26:15 AM
Boy oh boy, does it ever show that I haven't had my morning coffee yet..... let's correct the two major typos above, NOW .... lol (there's goes my credibility as a proof-reader, eh?) "Maybe they should include a category when you fill out your profile stating how recent the pics are that we post? That would solve the majority of the problems I suppose. Although THERE'D be alot fewer pics, I'm sure." And of course the saying is.... BEAUTY IS ONLY SKIN DEEP... BUT UGLY GOES ALL THE WAY THROUGH! Ah.. that feels much better. (Nahhhhh, I'm NOT a perfectionist) Khady

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 88 (view)

Photos and the older person! Posted: 8/19/2006 6:20:49 AM
Maybe they should include a category when you fill out your profile stating how recent the pics are that we post? That would solve the majority of the problems I suppose. Although there's be alot fewer pics, I'm sure. There's also the category that asks about body size/shape/whatever.... I don't think some people answer that one honestly. I find that I look very different in most pics than I do in real anyway. When pics are taken for display (posed pics), you can angle your head just so to disguise the jowls, and get the lighting right to disguise some of the lines and saggy bits though. lol I did decide to post the one that made me look my worst though, just to be TOTALLY honest. But hey.. what you see is what you get. And I always bear in mind the saying... BEAUTY IS ONLY SKIN DIP, BUT UGLY GOES ALL THE WAY THROUGH! BTW.. mine are all taken within the last year, with the most recent one taken about 6 months ago (the red hair... It was the result of an experiment that went horribly wrong ). I'm back to more blonde now and feeling more myself... and no, I haven't cut my hair, despite the fact that my mother (she's 89) keeps telling me I'm too old for long hair because I'm a "matron" now that I'm in my 50's. Ugh.... I'm hoping there's nothing "matronly" about my outlook. Khady

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

Arthritis??? Posted: 8/19/2006 5:57:16 AM
I got jeuvenille rheumatoid arthritis when I was 14. Back then they didn't know that aspirin would destroy your stomach if taken without food, so I was taking 10 - 12 per day, just chewing them up and swallowing them (yeah, yucky, but during school hours, when it was time for meds, it was too much trouble to walk all the way down the hall to the fountain). I was gradually allowed to lower the dosage down to 6 per day, but thankfully after about 2 years it went into remission until I was in my 20's. By then they had some new nsaids on the market and I went through some of those, but all hurt my stomach, so I refused to take them, and just put up with the pain for years, taking Tylenol for the pain, but nothing for the inflamation. Nowadays, I'm more plagued with osteo-arthritis, in just about every joint in my body. I've been very fortunate that I haven't developed the deformities that arthritis can bring over time, other than a few bumps now starting on my finger joints. But the Glucosamine, Chondroitin, MSM combination has made a world of difference for me. I still take the new Arthritis Strength Tylenol, but can usually get by with only taking 2 in the morning before work. It took about 2-3 weeks before the Glucosamine kicked in, and every once in a while I have to up the dosage for a few weeks, but generally 1500mg/day of Glucosamine and 1200/day of Chondroitin keeps me moving and relatively pain free. Considering the fact that 2 years ago, I had to call my neighbour and ask her to help me get dressed in the mornings, I'm doing great! Mornings are always a "boitch" lol.... but once I get moving, I'm good to go for the day, until I collapse in my computer chair when I get home at night. I'm so glad that I read this forum though, because I'm DEFINITELY going to try out the DMSO as a rub. The knees and hips are an especially troublesome area. I don't want to win any marathons, but I sure do want to keep being able to function on my own for as long as I can before I start replacing joints. That sounds worse than what it is. My mom had both her hips replaced in the last 5 years (she's now 89) and she's like a new woman. She's still very active and lives alone, drives her own car (she takes the exam every year), and doing her painting (she started painting when she was 75 yrs old). She's an amazing woman! I'm hoping my kids will be able to say that about me if I get to be her age. Khady

Joined: 6/29/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

is it sad to have my computer as my life line after a split Posted: 8/17/2006 11:34:05 PM
saucony95 you're absolutely right... there are many POSITIVE things about the computer. It definitely opened up a whole new world for me 10 years ago or so. The first few years were filled joyous discoveries... learning new programs, meeting people from all over the world, applying for jobs online, reading the newspapers without having to pay (always a bonus), purchasing airline tickets online, shopping, chatting into the wee small hours of the morning, going to work, then running back home to get online and see who was there waiting for me. It definitely gave me a reason to go home to my otherwise lonely apartment. I've made some good friends online - from overseas, and more locally - who I had the chance to meet personally and years later, we're still good friends. You learn to spot the players, the users and the no-goods with the first "what do you do for fun", or "what are you wearing right now", or "asl"... sheeeesh give me a frickin' BREAK!!! Although I must say, those lines are mostly used by newbies who haven't polished their acts yet lol. It's tougher to spot the ones who are seasoned and who say all the right things "I've been in chat a long time, and I'm past all that.. I don't like games"... uh-huh... THINK AGAIN! If they seem too good to be true, chances are... THEY ARE TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE. It's real life in here, just the same as it is out there. Out in public (or on the computer) we're out to impress and attract. We might be a little bolder given the anonymity the computer gives us, but we're all still who we are in "real". If you get the feeling you can't trust someone here, it isn't going to get any better in person. If they make you cry through neglect, cruelty or disloyalty on the computer.. guess what??? That's just the way that person IS. It's not a misunderstanding on your part. Don't start to doubt your instincts, because that's the greatest indicator of right and wrong. Common sense is the watchword. As for this being part (or the greater part of) our social life.... people who were lonely 100 years ago, used to write to pen pals. Some even agreed to get married without ever seeing the other person or hearing their voice on the telephone. What an advantage we have nowadays with cams and pc phones, etc. In more recent times, it was either sit home alone watching tv, listening to the stereo, or talking on the phone with the same old people all the time. But now WE HAVE THE COMPUTER.... and MILLIONS of opportunities to meet that special someone with whom we can grow old. Think of it as the lottery.... YOU CAN'T WIN IF YOU DON'T PLAY! Good luck to one and all

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