So instead, I think the proper thing to do is get ordained as a minister (hell, I'm already more familiar with Christian dogma than most of the religious I meet) and put on a good show with singing and big production values. I just have to sermonize with a preacher's cadence to my voice and dress like a pimp.

Personally, I find the candor refreshing and if one did get into a FWB type of situation, you would know up front that that is all its going to be. And frankly, I only get upset with the men that give the impression that things are going to be more serious than they are. That's where the hurt feelings and anger come in.

And if you're wondering why I take this approach, lets just say that I've run into some crazies when I have been upfront and honest. Anybody else use similar tactics?

And that's the point. You're right, chances are that we aren't compatible. But not because I didn't cooperate very much with a first-date kissing, but because you decided that we weren't because of it. My actions didn't mean what you decided they meant, but what it means that you decided they did is important. That's what I want to find out.

And again, that's the point. That's what I want to find out. And this includes you including deciding if you want to sleep with me with whether we kiss on the first date.

You don't get points or validation for your view just because many other women would do this. Especially getting certain kinds of predictable feedback from people on POF.

Yea, that sucks. It was so fun. That was such a sweet date, with the right intimacy and opportunity for us to really get to know each other, and that leaning in to kiss me was exhilarating. Can we start over? I'm so sorry. I was a big dummy head. I'm gonna pull the stick out of my arse and loosen up. Hehehe!

Wait, we can't do that. Because you self-defeatingly decided you didn't want a second date. Doh!

Well the man I started dating said he tried Viagra and it still was in sleep mode. So he invested into a pee pee pump in a black bag with lube and rubber thing with a pair of ladies underware in his little black bag that he showed me.

The young girls on here are spoilt for choice and ive often read the ratio is something like 10 guys to every 1 girl so they can afford to be choosey!

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Would you go on a date with gcdeb again?

bilge of turf and we'll be alone and without an engine on a 30 mile journey punching into the Atlantic, should be good for the soul.

I'll pick it up in a few days, thanks, bye

In such a case, you can keep your friend zone. I don't want it. And keep the cardboard fort. I don't take kindly to such rudeness as friendzoning because I wouldn't kiss on a first freaking date. Yes, you're right, it'd be a fun date...shame you can't handle not kissing on a first date. You people and your friend-zone-concepts. Keep that crap away from me. Where did that come from anyway, teenybopper MTV?

I don't know how I can emphasize this enough - we're talking about the first date here. Date number one. Numero Uno. I don't care how extroverted I or you might be, I don't care how sure we both think that we're "feeling that freaking chemistry" the right way on the first date, I don't care how comfortable each of us might be with intimacy, I don't care how important it is to get a feel for someone through kissing...this is only the first date. If you think that any kind of impressions two people get from each other on a first date really mean a damn thing, or think I'm not interested just because of a lack of a kiss, or rather, if you just can't go on a second date or conjure up the "friend zone" because no kissing takes place on first date, I need to know stuff like that as early as I can.

Who times these things?

What about repeat performances in a 24 hour period, how does that count? Stimulation no stimulation ? Love or just sex?

Aircon or no aircon? Makes a difference.

I didn't say you can't kiss on a first date. I didn't say that if you kiss on a first date that you're a whore. I didn't say anything against the need to feel chemistry. I don't know where those things came from, and don't understand why you said them...

...what I said was about you not wanting a second date because I don't try to kiss you on the first one. That's it. Don't read anything else into it. In other words, after spending a 6hr first date building a cardboard box pirate-space-ship-fort, and colouring it in together...and you leaned in to kiss me...if I didn't welcome the kissing gesture or simply didn't return it but just took the one you gave, or I pulled away, or whatever - everythng was just fine, I wasn't weirded out at all and it's obvious that I'm still having a good time, our time together was just as sweet as how you imply with this date description and the fact that you wanted to lean in to kiss me in the first place - you wouldn't want to see me again? You wouldn't want a second date?

Now, what you should do is...if after reading this you're feeling different about it, or you are having second thoughts about where I'm coming from, what you thought I meant, and what you're thinking on it is (if you're thinking that ok maybe you'll still want a second date)...you should forget that and consider why you posted that last question in the first place. Why did you read something completely different from what I said? Why did you ask me if I'd run or call you a whore just because you'd lean in to kiss me on a good first date? They are two very different things, so different it's crazy. Consider why you changed what I said into something completely different...how in the world did you hear the one instead of the other...what were you thinking? That is where we might learn something.

I'm a damn mess-sucked into the drama, need help out.

My counselor didn't see a problem in me. Said I did most of her work for her by looking at myself. I have considered not dating but that's not going to work for me. While I'm ok being alone-when I am by myself I like myself. But at 30 with no kids I do feel an extra rush. And while I feel I am whole and love myself-maybe even toward narcissism a bit-I do want someone to share my life and myself with.

Haha! What a sad state of affairs. It's just the second date, and she won't have it if I don't kiss her on the first? So much going on, so many elements to a relationship or those first few dates...but that first-date-kiss, it's so important, if I don't do it, then attraction & chemistry is null and it's over, no second date. I mean, I straight-up think that is weird.

This is why this is almost a rule with me...I freaking insist on being able to find out if this is how a woman's mind works. It's imperative that she have an understanding and attitude about what a relationship is that's at least remotely compatible with mine.

Don't forget OP, you actually HAD a date last Saturday. Many, and I do mean many here did not. But, you decided to come here and tell us how bad you feel cause after the date, nothing more was added. You had a date. It went well, and you had fun. Dating does not always end with marriage, or a long term relationship. Dating is suppose to be a social interaction with another, and "fun" is one of the goals within it. So, in fact, Saturday should be looked at with nothing but good thoughts.

The sexual compatibility is amazing.

Try this...
Go to Google Images.... type in "Hiv in men"

This Is my very last post on POF forums ...at Hearts suggestion I am apologizing to Bronx for anything I said that was hurtful or insulting to him ..as well as to heart or anyone else .. that was not my intention ..I have realized that I no longer have a Dog in this race ..so to stay any longer would make no sense .. I can no more solve other peoples problems then I can my own .. so It is time to... Check Out ..I no more fit in here than I do any where else


Its been a blast
Deerdog has left the building

Pelvic exams are performed:

During a yearly physical exam.
When a woman is pregnant.
When a doctor is checking for an infection (such as chlamydia, vaginosis, trichomoniasis, and others).
When a woman is having pain in her pelvic area or low back.

Ok well things have been a little quiet on the forums of late...

As we get to know each other better, I realize that we share many of the same values, but hardly any of the same interests.

I was very turned off when I saw her get frustrated and start cursing out her children the other day... and it seems to be something that's not too rare for her.

She doesn't seem to appreciate anything that I do for her.

Some of her language and actions has already shown me that she seems to possibly lack respect for me. The other day she started speaking somewhat disrespectfully to me in front of her kids.

The problem is that she has two kids, one of whom has some minor behavior and learning issues

I dont like my kid being put in some random's care during his early years.

Yup. You know it! Thanks for your money, cheers to that mate?

Drinks anyone? It's all on me :D... or should I say, all on you guys! lol

*rolls eyes*

Don't cause unnecessary fear for this woman...

At least half of sexually active people will have HPV at some point in their lives, but few women will get cervical cancer.

Around eight out of 10 women will become infected with genital HPV at some time in their lives.

Most women who have the HPV infection never get cervical cancer; only a few types of the HPV result in cervical cancer.

The problem is usually not the HPV... it's the cancers that can rise up from an HPV infection...HPV related cervical cancer kills as many women in North America as the number of women who die from Aids...

Causes
The cause of cervical cancer is unknown. Factors that put some women at a higher risk of cervical cancer include:

-infection with the human papilloma virus (HPV)
-being the daughter of a woman who used the drug diethylstilboestrol (DES) during pregnancy to prevent a miscarriage
-smoking, which increases the risk of cervical cancer fourfold.
-Around eight out of 10 women will become infected with genital HPV at some time in their lives. It causes no symptoms. Most women who have the HPV infection never get cervical cancer; only a few types of the HPV result in cervical cancer.

Generally accepted internet rule that states that pornography or sexually related material exists for any conceivable subject.

I'm looking for a girl. But not just any girl. I am looking for a girl with character. Someone who is as interesting as me. Actually, someone who is the exact opposite of me is just as well, because we get to learn more about each other that way.

Well, of all the replies since my second post, nobody has tried to answer my "sex with personnel hygene, grooming" correlation.

And I think that sex is similar in ways to other things in life for instance; like bathing, showering and personal grooming. It's not complicated! Or am I wrong here? Did people need to be shown how to bath and use a shower and soap? I know I didn't! It was something I learned on my own.

I've never been on a date before or met any other gay men yet, it more than likely wont ever happen, but I've been trying for a long time with out any luck.