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Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 217 (view)

What are you reading? Posted: 7/11/2007 7:09:27 AM
New update... "Time Enough for Love" by Robert Heinlein.

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 211 (view)

What are you reading? Posted: 7/3/2007 8:13:25 AM
Sex, Love, and Dharma.... (By Arthur Jeon)

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 28 (view)

harry potter--anyone preordered yet? Posted: 7/3/2007 8:12:08 AM
No .... I'm going to wait until everywhere has them and then they discount them, just like they did with every other book in the series. But I do love them. Re-read the whole series each time a new book comes out. They do definitely get better as they go along. You can clearly see that the first couple books JK was learning how to write.... By the later ones she had it down pretty well.

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 103 (view)

would you date or marry a divorced woman?is another mans trash another mans treasure? Posted: 9/18/2006 12:53:58 PM
Basically its this... Divorce means that possibly one (or both) parties in a marriage couldn't make it work. The other gets "divorced" whether they wanted to or not. And yes divorced people are either ones who make bad choices and don't learn, or ones who MADE bad choices and have learned (or are learning). I think someone who is divorced and is growing as a result of the experience is a better choice than someone who was too afraid of intimacy to ever get that "serious". I'm currently dating a wonderful woman who was "common-law" and has a son from that relationship. Neither of us are perfect (no one is), but we've come a long way and we're going to go farther.

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 38 (view)

Future of manned space flight Posted: 9/18/2006 11:12:08 AM
Possibly the military aspect s behind the new push for space, but lets not lose sight of the fact that the original one generated HUGE benefits for growth a development in all fields of science and tech. Things that are commonplace in the exercise/outdoors market like gore-tex waterproof breathable membranes. Thats still pretty amazing stuff. It meant the US economy was on top for years, but no longer.

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 94 (view)

Media Caught Lying About Secret Prisons Posted: 9/18/2006 10:57:56 AM
Like this is news? Media lie routinely and if ever actually caught at it either blame a "source" or pass it off as an innocent "mistake". My favourite are columnists who present opinion like its fact, and take advantage of that to sway people's opinions.

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Military Parade in Toronto September 17th Posted: 9/18/2006 10:55:26 AM
I agree that our forces don't get the support they deserve, even our government has not always afforded the veterans the respect they veterans showed in fighting for our country.

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 29 (view)

The Fearful Of Quality Men, But Run Too Loosers Posted: 8/31/2006 1:10:10 PM
I'm going through this myself. The woman I had a relationship for more than the past year is broken like this. She knows it. I know it, but we can't talk about it or work on it, because then its me "pressuring" her. Hey I admit I'm not perfect. I have some of the same "damage" and have spent a lot of time working on it. Both with professional guidance and on my own. We both knew this going in, but the perception point means that no matter what you say or do, all she hears is the filtered perception that you don't want her or that you won't commit. I spent almost a year and a half with her. 5-7 days a week. Doing things with her, her family, her son who she shares custody of. Often she'd not attend my family things and then complain about how she didn't feel like she fit in. She never tried to talk to my family. When I'd try to talk to her about OUR relationship, she'd say that I wanted her to be something she wasn't, that I didn't accept her and she couldn't live with me if I didn't want to get married and have kids. I'd been telling her since we started dating that I did want those things, but that they had to come in the right time and once we had gotten past the communication and initmacy issues we both knew we had. Or at least had them at a manageable level. Why would I do this? Because I knew her for years, we were good friends who loved each other as friends and who felt more than that for each other. Because we thought at the beginning that we could do this and I think she is a wonderful woman who any man would be lucky to share his life with. The problem is she won't let herself be loved. She knew this and she's past the really obvious problems. Now she's really sneaky and subtle with it so she can hide it from herself. For example she smoked. And just before we got together she was quitting and making great progress. It can be really hard to do. As her friend I was thrilled and when we started dating and getting romantically involved it was good, because I can't stand smoking and would never have kids with someone who smoked. Adults can choose, children can't. But while she never smoked in front of me, once we started getting serious, she quit trying to stop. She just did it at work, or when out with her friends. She blamed a stressful event for her giving up on the quitting, I didn't ask, she volunteered Then she started smoking MORE when she did it. So much so that even though I didn't see her smoking I knew she was. Not even by her breath or her clothes but by the way the smell came out her pores. Then she started doing it when I was present, we'd be out for a night of fun with friends and she'd start sneaking out for a drag, and then a whole one, and then blatantly bumming one off someone and going to smoke it... All knowing that this was something that mattered a great deal to me. When I finally asked about it, in a non-confrontational way she said she was stressed and it helped her relax, and that when around her friends who smoked she craved it. Yet she still said she hated it and wanted to quit. We'd go away for a week on our own and she'd go the whole time without a smoke or even the usual smoker withdrawal symptoms. But as soon as we were home she'd "go out with her friends" or to visit her mom and come back reeking. Finally when we broke up she "admitted" that part of her wanted to keep smoking while she still hated it and she hated herself for smoking. She was victimizing herself with an addiction, an addiction that she knew would eventually prevent our relationship from progressing so she could absolve herself of the responsibility for sabotaging the relationship. Afterall, its such a tough addiction to break, who could blame her? It was me being unreasonable and the all comsuming addiction that was to blame. Her "friends" who never once backed her efforts to quit, and who often berated her (and me) for letting me "pressure" her into wanting to quit, to change for me... It was never "for me" she said she wanted it and started before we were even dating. The really hard part is I still love her very much, and I doubt she realizes what she's done. Sorry that turned into a bit of a rant, but I still care a lot and am struggling with this.

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 74 (view)

Why do older men have dirty minds? Posted: 7/24/2006 10:19:18 AM
Heh heh!! I'm not really older, but I am heading in that direction... I know to some women I'm already "too old". I also know that as someone else said, its not so much that we're dirtier as we get older, but that we know what we can get away with and what women really enjoy and are a lot more confident and so a lot more willing to "risk" it. So we talk the talk a lot more, not because we can't walk the walk, but because we know we CAN and have and that at least half the fun is in the talk. Any guy can do the "ole in out" but an older guy can make it FUN!

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 115 (view)

Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married? Posted: 7/24/2006 9:35:31 AM
"One question for you: Then why do I have so many female friends on online dating sites telling me a different story. Seems of the 8 of us... all met men that were looking for long term and yet all they wanted was "SEX". " My view is this: Yes they are, with the right woman. BUT being opportunistic and possibly (probably?) lonely they'll settle for sex with whatever woman they can find in the meantime. There are larger variations in behaviour and desires on a individual basis within a sex than there are between sexes. In other words, not all men or women want the same thing. Every person is and individual when it comes to what they want and its your job to find out what that is if you wish to have something more long term than a date with them. There are players who will say anything (lie) to get what they want without letting you know verbally what that is. They will cause you problems. There are genuine, honest people who don't know or aren't really sure what they want. They lie to themselves (and others )when they're afraid of hurt feelings. They will also cause problems. There are open, honest, upfront people who what you see is what you get and if thats what you want then thats what you need to be.

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 28 (view)

short hair, long hair...no hair Posted: 7/17/2006 6:31:27 AM
Not a woman, but from a guy's perspective, most guys find medium to long hair more attractive and feminine than short hair. Lets make some definitions here since its all relative. For women: Medium is below the ear about the jawline to shoulder length. Long is longer than shoulder length. Short is anything shorter than below the ear/jawline. For men: short is completely shaved to about 2-3" long, medium is 3"-6", long is anything longer than that. I have naturally curly hair that left to its own devices and grown out would make a big ol' fro. I have at times shaved my head and at other times had it pushing 6" in length. When its short (1" or under) its the most maintenance free, since it doesn't even need brushing. Wash and wear, the problem is thats a pretty austere/severe look on anyone. By dyeing it I can relax some of the curl and have hair that I can grow and style. The result is more fun and more variable, but also more work. My solution since my hair grows fast is seasonal variation. I let it grow when its cold out and cut it short when its hot. That combined with dyeing means I have a variable hair style. More fun that being the same old same old all the time... As a final thought, hair is like clothes, no matter the style, you're still just you underneath it all.

Curious_rapture

Joined: 7/13/2006

Msg: 52 (view)

Dear Ladies: I beg to raise the smoking issue? Posted: 7/13/2006 12:07:04 PM
I'm not a woman, but I have this issue with women I date. Apart from all the comments about smoking and the smell/taste. Yes it permeates everything, even your body odours and tastes are different when smoking. There's something more. If its a crutch for you then that's a fatal dependence. To me its no different than an alcoholic or a drug addict. Sure its legal, but its a failing that affects a lot more than how you smell taste. Why would anyone knowingly go into a relationship with someone addicted to a substance that is killing them AND anyone who inadvertently gets a whiff of smoke going by? Why would anyone sign up to getting emotionally attached to someone who is likely to get some horrific form of cancer and die years before they do? Then lets talk about families, about having kids, about the example it sets for them and the effect it has on their health growing up. As for the militant smokers who think their rights are being infringed I have one thing to say. When its OK for me to piss in your drink on the restaurant table (before you drink it), thats when I'll be OK with you smoking in my air at the restaurant.

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