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jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 136 (view)

Hello all Posted: 11/28/2008 5:22:22 PM
Jim in Moorestown, NJ, not Morristown Turning the big 40 shortly, would like to find some singles to have a beer with, friends are married and/or not in the local area. I work in Philly. Drop me a note, let me know what the inbox notification looks like

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 107 (view)

Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder) Posted: 3/17/2007 6:49:03 PM
Amen, brother. My ex informed me after our divorce that her therapists thought she was bi-polar....no kidding! I now totally screen for mental health. I'd much rather be alone otherwise.

Jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 106 (view)

OMG!! Are you guys SERIOUSLY this homophobic???? Posted: 2/16/2007 3:47:08 PM
Hey Eaglesfan, if it bothers you that much, edit your mail settings and select to receive mail from females only. That will stop the homos from commenting on your big muscles

Jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

What do men really think about women getting Posted: 2/15/2007 5:58:35 PM
Only if you would look better than me with hair extensions

Jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 89 (view)

OMG!! Are you guys SERIOUSLY this homophobic???? Posted: 2/15/2007 5:56:39 PM
I think most guys are homophobic whether they admit it or not and it really shouldn't surprise you that much. And, you might consider withholding some info and filing it under the did not need to know category like - shopping with gay guys?

Jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 85 (view)

Help out a born prude! Posted: 2/12/2007 6:06:51 PM
We could have pondered this question at Mario's in Pittsburgh over a yard of beer.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 14 (view)

after a divorce life is like being in limbo.... Posted: 1/15/2007 1:13:46 PM
Yes, everything you say here is true. I think being divorced and single in the mid/late 30s is very difficult. Friends are married with kids and there is a big generation gap. You can try to get involved with something you haven't done or do something you would like to do. But ultimately, you learn more about yourself and maybe what you really want out of life. Being single is a lot better than being in a bad marriage.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 11 (view)

for better or for worse? Posted: 1/1/2007 7:40:49 PM
Clinically, depression and anxiety are interrelated. IMO, treatment for one and not the other might be part of the problem. I'm just trying to be helpful. I have seen it first hand.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

for better or for worse? Posted: 1/1/2007 6:50:03 PM
Hey sneak, there is no substitute for having your own place especially if home life isn't great. It will improve your dating life, at least potentially. Take it from me, I have a four bedroom house on an acre of land all for little 'ole me. While it's more than I need, it is home for now and it gets very comfortable. As far as loneliness goes, if you live by yourself, it will happen so don't fear it, just learn to deal with it. I'm 38 and many of my friends are married with kids or live miles away. And I do not have a girlfriend. So I adapt to the situation by working and keeping myself entertained and busy. Enjoy your new place, it is exciting to decorate, landscape and you will feel pride of ownership. Since we are neighbors, I read some of your other posts and I think you might suffer from depression. Just trying to help here. My ex had tons of issues and the tone of some of your posts just gives me that impression. Good luck.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Triumph & Rush sound similar or not? Posted: 1/1/2007 4:13:48 PM
I think you are right and there is no doubt that Emmett's versatility became a problem for Gil and Mike. And certainly, Rik was the musician with the other two more complimentary. Without Rik there was no Triumph as the other guys found out.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 79 (view)

The ART on your walls... and WHY? Posted: 1/1/2007 3:58:42 PM
I recently bought some landscape oils on Ebay which I have been very happy with. I'm not much of an 'art guy' but I do like landscape paintings.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

Triumph & Rush sound similar or not? Posted: 1/1/2007 3:51:19 PM
I agree. But that was Triumph's label for the most part. Of course, they did very well overcoming it and made a successful touring career with some good airplay as time went on. I think Rush was more prog rock than Triumph but Triumph, and Rik in particular, began to gravitate in that direction later on. Rik used to say that Gil and Mike resisted that direction saying that stuff doesn't sell records, but he also hinted that all they could play was straight rock stuff.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

How to prevent an ending ?? Posted: 1/1/2007 3:36:48 PM
Obviously it doesn't tear you up in hindsight so you handled it correctly. My ex-wife left me for someone else and she had her reasons but she was also bi-polar and had a huge mental history so I said - Have a nice day.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Triumph & Rush sound similar or not? Posted: 1/1/2007 3:28:52 PM
I live in NJ but Triumph and Rush are two of my favorites and I still listen to both regularly. I like them both for different reasons. Over the years people had sort of lumped them together thinking that Triumph was a Rush rip off when in fact I never saw the similarities beyond both being a 3-piece band from Toronto during the same time period. Thoughts?

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 12 (view)

Rik Emmett, under-rated, under apreciated guitarist? Posted: 1/1/2007 3:26:00 PM
Rik is certainly one of the most talented guitarists of our generation. Problem is, Triumph was not a huge commercial success (at least not in the US) so I think his popularity was never able to peak. However, I think he did received a lot of recognition by peers and industry insiders. I guess he could be considered a guitarist's guitarist. I know he recently won a Juno in Canada for best guitarist and I used to read his column in Guitar Player Magazine in the 80s, so it's not like he is an unknown.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 23 (view)

Does a guy's voice matter? Posted: 1/1/2007 2:52:45 PM
I've been told by women that I have a great voice and that I speak very well. But they're just saying that because it's true.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

Advice for dealing with stalkers Posted: 1/1/2007 2:48:39 PM
Consult with an attorney and send him some certified mail as a warning to stop or else. Chances are, he will stop.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 87 (view)

Why do women want extra meat on a guy? Posted: 1/1/2007 7:39:16 AM
Dude, we need to swap our contacts. I'm 6'1, about 250, stocky but not grossly overweight and am strong as hell and no takers. In my experience, virtually all average to thin women want average to thin guys with only a rare exception.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

Online Ettiquette.. ?? Posted: 1/1/2007 7:31:42 AM
On-Line ettiquette is simply using common sense. People are so afraid of telling others that they are not interested that they blow the person off, whether on e-mail, phone or in person, and that makes the situation much worse for the other person. The bottom line, with on-line dating there are no commitments, just send an e-mail saying you don't think it would work. You can't be doing the on-line thing with thin skin, we've all experienced crazy stuff.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 19 (view)

Arrogance vs Simple and Keep it Real Types Posted: 12/17/2006 5:55:43 AM
This is a fact - women love some type of drama despite the fact that they say they don't want it, it is actually a need they have. Therefore, maybe the arrogant man doesn't work but a confident guy with lots of money will have his pick of women even if he is average looking. I guess you could debate arrogance vs confidence, sometimes I think it is a fine line.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

Question about your profession... Posted: 12/17/2006 4:46:30 AM
Women that say "I have one" or "It's a job" or nothing at all are insecure about what they do for a living. I think 90% of men don't really care unless it is really an odd profession or maybe they are strippers.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 50 (view)

How long should people search on a dating site Posted: 12/16/2006 5:03:26 PM
It is definitely not you. I've been on here a short time but was on Match for a long time with no success. A couple points. One, this should not be your primary source of dating though I realize for a lot of people it is. Two, I have a theory about saturating yourself with on-line dating. You are exposing yourself to a limited number of people, that is, new people can sign up but for the most part those people are not local to you, do not meet your criteria etc. The longer you stay on a particular site, the more 'exposed' you are, people see your profile, at first it is new and maybe you get responses, then it get old and seen by the same people over and over. So, the longer you stay on, the lower your probability of meeting someone special. That's my theory. Some people change their pics, profile and go off and on sites to try to freshen things up. But you are not alone there.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 12 (view)

Words Posted: 12/16/2006 4:53:45 PM
Nobody loves anybody in three weeks, his drinking could be a major problem. Suggest you be very careful.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 24 (view)

How about a rich man? Posted: 12/16/2006 10:58:27 AM
Not trying to bum you out, dude, but it is my belief that women will not admit that money is important because they don't want to be 'shallow'. But actions speak louder than words, money does matter to most women in terms of opening that door.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 22 (view)

How about a rich man? Posted: 12/16/2006 10:18:00 AM
Most people are very immature when it comes to money. I think it exposes political correctness, character and personality flaws. Anyone that tells you that they don't care about money - at all - is probably a liar. If you join the Peace Corps or the Red Cross then you probably genuinely don't care about money or material things and are more of a humanitarian. If so, my hat is off to you and I think it's great. But most men and women want money and spend a great deal of time trying to be financially successful. Some do not but that's about lack of intelligence or drive, not lack of desire to have it. Ask any poor guy if he'd like to make more money. Ask any girl. There is nothing wrong with that; it is afterall the American Dream. There is also nothing wrong with dating someone that has money or even super rich - the gold diggers are easy to spot and won't get very far. People say money isn't important when it is. It doesn't buy you eternal happiness or longevity in a relationship but it is still important to lots of women. Why do many couples seek therapy and/or get divorced? You guess it, money.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

my exs gf Posted: 12/16/2006 9:45:01 AM
I would do nothing and ignore it. Eventually it will stop. If you do something it shows you are jealous and that's what she wants.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 73 (view)

Boyfriend Wont Help Out Around The House Posted: 12/16/2006 7:28:49 AM
If this is really a big issue for you, then you might not be compatible with your boyfriend and you shouldn't get married to him because it will always be an issue. Not all guys are slobs. I'm not a neat freak but I do clean up daily. Most women that see my house are impressed with it. So, people are just different. However, if you are obsessive about cleaning and expectations you might have issues.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

Have a nice day!!! Posted: 12/16/2006 7:13:46 AM
I don't know, if I said that to you, I would really mean it

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 36 (view)

Have you had a man from POF make a date and cancel prior Posted: 12/16/2006 6:38:36 AM
It goes both ways, most women would rather say nothing and just move on instead of saying I am not interested.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 56 (view)

Why no follow thru??? Posted: 12/16/2006 6:18:01 AM
No expectations. If I stay connected with someone beyond 2-3 e-mails, it is rare. I think sometimes it is my fault but most of the time it is not. I have personality, though, and am polished and can talk about anything. I find lots of people on-line have no personality and don't know what to say which I find very amazing.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 34 (view)

Have you had a man from POF make a date and cancel prior Posted: 12/16/2006 6:16:03 AM
You should consider yourself lucky that he contacted you to cancel which is more polite and decent than lots of people on-line.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 292 (view)

Does ignoring a guy really get his attention? Posted: 12/16/2006 6:13:17 AM
Well, if you ignore me on-line, you'll get deleted from my in-box very quickly - which seems to happen often, unfortunately. I think with guys you can extrapolate that into 'real life' but there are always going to be a set of circumstances.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 29 (view)

What am I doing wrong? Posted: 12/11/2006 5:03:29 PM
Chances are you are doing nothing wrong. You have to remember that when you meet someone on-line, chances are, they are still talking to other people on-line - even if they say they are not. Of course, it could have been many other things too. I also think people naturally form an impression of who they want the person to be when communicating on-line and when they actually meet it might all good and nice but when some time goes by they might feel disappointed that the person doesn't live up to their impression.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

First Contact Posted: 12/11/2006 4:53:49 PM
Most women will tell you to make it obvious that you read the profile. I am amazed how many women tell me about sexual overtones in e-mails, etc. I just can't believe that guys do that but if that is what the competition is doing it just makes me look good....and I need all the help I can get! Actually, I believe there needs to be balance when first making contact. Since I get maybe one response for every 20 e-mails I send out, it makes no sense for me to write a long e-mail to each person, it just isn't worth the time. So I stick with short and nice. Believe it or not books are written about on-line dating, how to contact people etc. But I believe you need to use common sense.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 78 (view)

Guys with money. Posted: 11/27/2006 3:24:08 PM
I think people are confusion many things here. First re-read the question, it had nothing to do with 'all things being equal' between two guys etc., and it did not suggest that money leads to a satisfying relationship. Nobody is saying that money is the glue that bonds people, what I think the interesting aspect here is - do women take into account personal wealth when choosing a partner - or even a date? I also think the point of the issue here is not just the filthy rich that attact gold-diggers with the fake boobs (no offsense intended), it is more general and realistic to today's society. I have heard MANY comments from women over the years that support the men's thesis and studies to boot. I do believe generalizations are a mistake and nobody should take it personally. And I also wonder about regional trends, in the Northeast people tend to be judgmental (generalization) and competition for high paying jobs (and women) can be fierce. That tends to bring out both the best and worst in people hence the reputation. ps. Why are there so many people here from Canada?

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 65 (view)

Guys with money. Posted: 11/27/2006 12:50:44 PM
I see I started one hell of a thread, please post those academic journals!!!

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 15 (view)

Guys with money. Posted: 11/26/2006 5:25:27 PM
You expanded upon the societal thesis I hinted to above in my earlier response though you added the element of height which is directly related to wealth. While I think you are 100% right, I also think the changing role of women over the past 30 years has somewhat leveled the playing field. But I still believe women look for weath even if on a subconscious level. Now the fact that I am 6'1, make very good money and cannot get a date is just my problem

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

Guys with money. Posted: 11/26/2006 4:03:37 PM
I guess it just depends on the individual. I still think it is true that some women are attracted to guys with money - not sure if this is the gold-digging theory or not - but probably less today than in the past when women didn't work and few held high paying jobs. And, today, women are much more liberal and independent.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

mixed messages Posted: 11/26/2006 3:38:47 PM
You might not want to read this but chances are you've been blown off and his 'going out of town for business' could just be an excuse. Sometimes you have a nice date and a day or two goes by and the other person is lured away or changes his/her mind. Sounds like you fell pretty hard and he didn't and that is a tough situation. Sorry for the negative spin but it might be realistic.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Guys with money. Posted: 11/26/2006 3:32:20 PM
Curious about this. Say you are casually dating two guys - both are pleasant and nice but one does better financially than the other - would you be more attracted to the guy with the money?

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Talking about money. Posted: 11/26/2006 2:39:19 PM
That goes without saying, I purposely gave her plenty of outs as time went on, she had a good time, not something she had to 'bear'. It's just annoying more than anything.

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

Talking about money. Posted: 11/26/2006 2:15:00 PM
Agreed, there was more to the conversation that I did reveal about othe topics. I think, though, if you are not interested in someone, why spend three hours talking and acting like you are having a nice time?

jimbo1268

Joined: 8/19/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Talking about money. Posted: 11/26/2006 12:48:21 PM
I recent had a first date with someone from a different site. We arrived at the restaurant in center city Philadelphia at 5:30, had a drinks and talked until roughly 9pm which is a fairly long first date. We obviously got along pretty well. At one point we were talking about jobs etc., (she is an engineer) and I mentioned that I make good money in a non-arrogant way, just for the basis on where the conversation was going. She eventually responded that she is not 'material' which is all well and good. I sent her a follow-up e-mail a couple days later and she never responded and that was about a week ago. Trying to figure out what happened there, I guess the money thing might have had something to do with it. Although I think it's pretty shitty of someone not to respond even if only to say 'I'm not interested'? Ladies - Any thoughts?

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