online dating service
REGISTER | MAIL/PROFILE | HELP | NOW ONLINE | SEARCH | RATING | FORUMS | SUCCESS STORIES

 

     
Posted In Forum:
Home   login   MyForums  
Show ALL Forums  
 
 Author Thread: Mentioning the ex: avoid it or be open about it?
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 107 (view)
 
Mentioning the ex: avoid it or be open about it?
Posted: 12/22/2008 2:35:46 PM
Well, shucks howdy, bodypro8, I'm much obliged for the nice words.

I simply believe there ought to be (at a minimum) a modicum of decency during courting. For a stranger... or even someone you've only gone out with a few times... to start asking personal questions... I find invasive, uncalled for, and out of line. I know we live in an age when someone you've JUST met is suddenly a "friend"... but I don't operate that way. You have to earn friendship; at best, right off the bat, you're merely an "acquaintance." However, people have cheapened "friend" to the point that someone who has only said hello to you and perhaps engaged you in a conversation or two... is now your friend. I can't live that way; I can't stand it. I'm also damn particular about whom I choose to share a drink.

Anyway... I just think there are a LOT of OTHER things open for discussion, that aren't nearly so invasive and delving, that could be discussed in the early portion of the courtship process.

Merry Christmas, sir.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 24 (view)
 
Hunters.. wildgame not dating..
Posted: 12/22/2008 12:20:47 PM

I'd love to get anyones know how on hunting predators.


Do a Google search for Bear Hunting Magazine. LOTS of good tips AND recipes in every issue.

I hunt everything I can afford, but bear hunting is my favorite. My best black bear to date squared an HONEST seven feet and had a 20 10/16" skull. Usually, I have rugs made, but that one I had a full-body mount done. I'll probably never get a better black bear. I have a two-bear black-bear hunt in Newfoundland next April and my second (and, unfortunately, probably last) brown-bear hunt in Alaska in late September.

Anyway... subscribe to the magazine if you're serious about wanting to learn. There are also a LOT of videotapes out there that you might find helpful. I must warn you, a lot of them are just excuses ("hunts") to be able to advertise a given product... but you just have to check around online and find which ones are better than others. Also, Bear Hunting Magazine does book and video reviews and that will give you a good idea of which ones to get and which ones from which you should steer clear.

Good hunting, ma'am.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 35 (view)
 
What's one thing you loved/love/miss about your ex?
Posted: 12/21/2008 9:20:06 PM
The chocolate Malt-o-Meal she would make on cold weekend mornings.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 72 (view)
 
Drug or Alcohol stuff - how long ago is ok?
Posted: 12/21/2008 9:12:35 PM

Sir, with all due respect, I am sad for you that you don't ever feel that it is within your person to bend without breaking, you don't know how sad that is to hear.


Thanks for the "Sopranos" moment. I sure miss that show.

Really, don't feel sad for me, for God's sake. Just consider me damaged goods and that's that. I do.

Now, I realize you females are all about feelings and such... but really, I'm not looking for, nor comfortable with, sympathy. If you want to feel sad, pop in "Terms of Endearment" or something.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 58 (view)
 
Why do women have sex and then complain about it?
Posted: 12/21/2008 5:41:41 PM

nothin' says lovin' like guttin'


I like that!
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 70 (view)
 
Drug or Alcohol stuff - how long ago is ok?
Posted: 12/21/2008 5:33:03 PM
First... raraavis41... enjoyed your post. Well reasoned, well written. Rare on this website.

Per this:


Now after all of that, I again ask you... to take a walk down your past and tell me that there is absolutely NOTHING in your life that you are ashamed of or might be misconstrude as weakness or lack character at first glance, with out the benefit of proper explaination. It doesn't have to do with addiction or crime. I am talking about everyday the way you conduct yourself and all the choices you have made in your life.


Ma'am, I carry more guilt for my actions than you'll ever live to know. I envy you and those like you who have not had to make some of the decisions I've made or taken the stands I've taken. I'm not whining, I'm not begging for understanding... I just don't give a s**t. This is the life I chose. Better me than someone... well, I'll just say, "not up to it."

Ashamed of things I've done? Lord yes. Guilt? Hell yes. I haven's slept well for over two decades. I think things and dream things I wouldn't wish on anyone. Am I special in that regard -- positively not. I'm not just talking about my military experiences... I'm talking about personal choices, actions, deeds... they've cost me. I've paid. I've paid and paid and paid. I'm still paying as I type this. You made a comment about human character in regard to "how quickly it can adapt effectively to changing conditions." I'll be honest... I think... no, I know... I'm weak in that regard, in "personal" situations. I just cannot allow myself to bend... because I assure you, I won't bend, I'll break. So perhaps those who can "adapt effectively to changing situations" are living in a happier place in life than I am. In fact, I'd bet on it. However, I don't include chemical abuse of any sort in said adapting.

Yes, I hunt. I make no apologies for it... nor, of course, did you ask for any. I don't see a correlation between that behavior and using alcohol or drugs. If you find hunting to be a "flawed behavior"... well, that's okay, I'm used to it, as is every other hunter. People talk about "sport hunting" and "trophy hunting" and "hunting for food" and they don't know a damn thing about what they're talking. They really don't. This also goes for someone who has hunted versus someone who is "a hunter." We're talking about the difference between a way of life... a way of TEACHING life (and death)... versus someone who just doesn't "get it" and never will.

As for anyone who once resorted to drugs and such and has since recovered... well, bravo for them. Still, it only tells me they broke once... and if you break once, you can break again, and I'm not looking to spend my time in a relationship with someone having a history of breaking. I want no part of such people.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 54 (view)
 
Why do women have sex and then complain about it?
Posted: 12/21/2008 4:56:08 PM

There have been forum topics on how women wont give in to sex until the man proves his love, and they get blasted for holding out by men. Now, if a woman gives herself to quickly, which could be from date 1 to the wedding night, she is labeled a slut. Men have us very confused, should we hold out and be dropped because we arn't giving or risk being called a slut because we had sex to soon by the men who want us but dont want us?


Valid points, all.

Here's a thought. On the first face-to-face date, nail down when swapping bodily fluids would be acceptable to both of you. Do it at a coffee joint or someplace public. No one leaves until this is settled. For example, he says "now," you say "four dates/weeks/months"... he says "two dates/weeks/months"... et cetera. Use whatever timelines you want, just get it out of the way. Make sure whatever you both decide upon is acceptable in his eyes as you not being a slut and make sure to your way of thinking you're not going too fast/slow. Just get it out of the way up front... then have another cup of coffee -- or, just screw whomever you wish on your own timetable and keep the information off the Internet.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 47 (view)
 
Arguments - How should you deal with them?
Posted: 12/21/2008 1:43:30 PM
Arguments? How to deal with them?

Well... never bring a knife to a gunfight.

If I wanted to argue with a woman, I'd still be married.

I don't... to disagree with some of you folks... think "arguing" is some kind of "normal manifestation" of being married / in a relationship. I've got a bad temper; I have a hard time backing down. If I'm in a relationship with a woman who is the same way... well, I was, actually, and it ended in divorce. I CAN "reason" -- I'd actually LIKE to "reason"... to discuss. I'd GREATLY prefer that. However, that requires a woman who is calmer in... "situations"... than I am. If she's more inclined to "talk"... I can bloody-well guarantee I'm going to be a LOT more likely to go that route, discussing, than screaming and arguing and... well, I'm just not going to go through that again. If, indeed, being in a relationship with a woman means I have to put up with a screaming b**ch... I'll happily die alone.

Oh... one thing spot-on to the opening question... a guy told me about a decade ago, something he learned in some kind of counseling situation for couples, that it's impossible to argue with someone if you're holding their hand. That is, the first thing you should do if you feel an actual, honest-to-goodness "argument" coming on... is take the other person's hand. Something about the physical contact, the one-to-one-"ness" of it... well, it makes it more likely you'll talk it out, rather than scream it out. I haven't been in a situation to test this but, frankly, I think there just might be something to it. Hooah.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Why do women have sex and then complain about it?
Posted: 12/21/2008 1:18:50 PM
And how does a man "prove his love"? Inquiring minds want to know.


1. Cancels a hunting trip he's planned for over two years to take you on some namby-pamby cruise.

2. Sells one of his own rifles to get the bucks to buy you one for Christmas.

3. Guts and skins YOUR deer so YOU can sit in the Durango getting warm.

I can go on, but you get the idea.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 63 (view)
 
Drug or Alcohol stuff - how long ago is ok?
Posted: 12/21/2008 12:36:38 PM

You never really know why someone goes down a particular road, until you ask THEM.

We all make mistakes, some intentional, some just bad judgement, but how many of us really have a Lily White past?


Okay... let's look at it your way, lady.

Going with what you wrote here... perhaps you could explain exactly what constitutes an ACCEPTABLE reason to become an alcoholic and/or a drug abuser? My "base" problem isn't the drugs or alcohol directly, it's the weakness in character, the lack of backbone, that couldn't stand up to strife. Ma'am, we ALL get strife. Everybody gets a little suffering dished out... and at times, we all get a few extra helpings. So what? It's some "excuse" to drink or smoke weed or pop pills? "I had ________ happen to me, and couldn't cut it, so I turned to _______." You're saying there are circumstances that are SO brutal that becoming addicted to some mood-altering substance is "okay?"

At what point in a person's life is it acceptable and understandable to just go out and become a spineless, addicted "I can't take it anymore" wimp? I mean, the REST of us have to deal with reality, so why do these other people get a free ride and get to "escape" reality? Perhaps you could elaborate on your point.

Oh... to the OP... I hope this is non-confrontational and on-topic enough for you.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 24 (view)
 
Roomate Left Today
Posted: 12/21/2008 12:24:14 PM

Sick of that cowboy up chit, it may work with bullets but it's not so productive in a relationship with a woman.


HE

DOES

NOT

HAVE

A

RELATIONSHIP.

What he DOES HAVE is some wench who dropped him like a hot potato. I told him to suck it up and drive on. What do YOU want him to do... ball up on the floor and cry and whimper like a little girl?
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 101 (view)
 
Mentioning the ex: avoid it or be open about it?
Posted: 12/21/2008 2:29:30 AM
I take as much meaning from what a person DOESN'T say as from what they DO say. I, personally, am curious about a person's ex, or at least their role in what went well and what didn't. If they refuse to say boo about it, I wonder what is being covered up. Not to say I harp on this, but I do want to know the backstory and what I get, even fragmentarily, better hang together, or I worry.


Well, gee... maybe it's none of your ________ business. How's THAT?! If I wanted to hear about some woman's "ex" I'd bloody well ask about him. I don't, however, "want" to hear about him. Likewise, what happened in MY marriage or any other previous relationship is between me and that person. Get it in your head, you're JUST A DATE! You're not "entitled" to jack squat. I don't work for you, I don't owe you anything, and MY PERSONAL LIFE WITH SOMEONE ELSE IS "MY PERSONAL LIFE WITH SOMEONE ELSE." Private things are "private" for a reason; I realize we're living in a Godless society which lacks all sense of decency and morality... but, color me old-fashioned, what happened in my personal life before our first or 20th date or whatever is NONE OF YOUR __________ BUSINESS unless "I" choose to do so at a TIME of MY choosing. Got it?

Also... get over the _______ JFK-conspiracy "Well, he won't talk about _____, so 'something must have happened.'" Until you EARN "personal," you don't get to HEAR "personal."

God, I HATE nosey women! First chat, E-mail, phone call, meeting, whatever... EVERY time... "Sooooooooo, why did you divorce?" First, I think it's a STUPID question, since it ought to be clear you get divorced when the marriage isn't working out. Second... and once again, though I'm being redundant... IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS AND IT SURE AS HELL ISN'T "OPENING" CONVERSATION MATERIAL. It's not a matter of being "sensitive" about it, it's a matter of it being private and not open for discussion and CERTAINLY not in the early stages of getting to know someone!

You want to get into the personal aspect of a man's life? EARN it!
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Roomate Left Today
Posted: 12/21/2008 2:12:46 AM

So my question is: What do I do now, seeing as she is gone and Christmas is next week?


Well, I'll tell you what works for me in such cases.

Purge your life of her. Burn pictures... I prefer shredding, but burning works... delete E-mails, remove her from your online address book, the works. Purge, delete, erase, destroy, cleanse. Then... close the book, walk away, or whatever you want to call it. Just put a bullet in it and walk.

Or... piddle around lamenting, wasting away, being depressed, thinking lots of "what ifs" and so on. Your call.

If she wanted to stay, she'd have stayed. She chose to un-a** you and your life.

As for Christmas... what to do? Personally, I sing "Happy Birthday" to Jesus and then it's just another day to me. I don't know why you need advice about Christmas. Be depressed... be happy. Whatever. It's "a day." Cowboy the f**k up and move on.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 55 (view)
 
Drug or Alcohol stuff?
Posted: 12/20/2008 8:21:46 PM
I would find someone who was unforgiving, rigid, harsh and self-righteous to have larger personality flaws than someone with an old drug use conviction on their record. JMO.


You know, initially, I was inclined to rip you a new rectum, ma'am... regarding your "larger personality flaws" jab... but, you know what? I think you're right. I read your comment, again and again and again, and pondered on it a might... and I think I'd be less than honest if I disagreed with you. I would say, however, those "larger personality flaws" have kept me alive in a profession that doesn't forgive complacency, softness, and perhaps a number of things you probably WOULD find attractive. I can say with complete honesty that I'm alive today, having lived through... well, "a few things"... probably directly due to those parts of my personality you, and others like you, would (and obviously do) find unappealing.

If I've paid "a price" as it were, by having "[large] personality flaws," to keep people I deeply care about safe... personally, I'll consider it a fair trade. I would never have it any other way.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 52 (view)
 
Drug or Alcohol stuff?
Posted: 12/20/2008 5:38:15 PM

Yeah, the father who ousted his son was pretty scary reading... I think in the long run his dog will be his only companion.... loved the dog bone cake.


Stepfather, stepson. Get it straight. I didn't raise him; when I came on the scene, he was 18... with all his little pathetic character traits embedded. Had I raised him from a small child, he'd have turned out different. I never used drugs and I don't tolerate anyone who does.

As for the cake... yes, she gets one every birthday from the local pet bakery; except for this past year when I was on my second deployment to Iraq.

My dog has proven to be a FAR better companion than most women... for that matter, "people" in general"... I know.

Sorry my degree of "backbone" and "resolve" doesn't cut it in your world of "give in" and "overlook." Well, actually... no, I'm not sorry. Hooah.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 1340 (view)
 
Do You Men Read Our Whole Profiles?
Posted: 12/20/2008 5:30:08 PM
I don't read the whole profile unless I'm able to get past the opening tidbits without having to reject her for unacceptability. "Not religious" -- reject. "Drugs=yes" -- reject. "Smoking=yes" -- reject. "Fat tub of lard=yes" -- reject. If she gets past those things, then I check height... if she's a pygmy -- reject. If she gets past that, I check the rest of her profile; if she's some kind of "Barbie" princess who doesn't hunt or like guns... reject. Before I contact someone, though, I've generally read the whole damn thing, yes.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 47 (view)
 
Drug or Alcohol stuff?
Posted: 12/20/2008 11:25:48 AM
I wouldn't use the word "vague" either - and decorum and forum rules preclude my commenting further - except to say that given the choice I'd be more inclined to date someone with a 20 year old drug conviction than someone who would back themselves into the corner of stubbornly ignoring their own grandchild because the grandchild's parent once disobeyed them.


So, basically, you're just a _______ (fill in your own insult of choice) who'd cave in on your own core values. Yeahhhhhhhhhhh, now THERE'S an example to set. Oh, and get it straight, retard... I didn't ignore my granddaughter. You read what you wanted to read, and made up and ASSumed the rest.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 123 (view)
 
Dating a Widow
Posted: 12/20/2008 1:25:53 AM
Well, I'd prefer dating a widow over someone with an ex-husband. Dead is dead; I like that kind of finality. I've had my fill of ex-husbands who don't "get it" that they had their time up to bat and blew it. They linger around in their former wives lives... literally. They show up, call, exist, breathe... personally, I'd rather they be dead ex-husbands.

Now, of course, there's the whole "ready to move on" issue that a woman has to deal with in either case (death or divorce) but, again, if she's ready to live the rest of her live... yeah, I'd rather the previous guy was dead.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 132 (view)
 
Should you give up your male friends??
Posted: 12/19/2008 6:37:56 PM
Opening Poster:

Let me get this straight; you were banging some of these guys and you're still WANTING to hang out with them? And your current boyfriend disapproves???

I agree with the others who have said the problem is his. His problem is the same as what I'd have with you... and I'd dump your silly a** to the curb, just as he should. Since he apparently won't, though, help the guy out and break up with him -- you'd be doing him a favor. Oh... and DON'T hang out with him afterward. Spare him that little bit of bulls**t "drama."
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Drug or Alcohol stuff - how long ago is ok?
Posted: 12/19/2008 6:31:02 PM
Opening Poster:

I'll never have anything to do with a woman who EVER used drugs for recreational purposes. "EVER." Same thing goes for alcoholics.

I called a drug raid on my own house when I found "drug paraphernalia" in his bedroom. I had let him stay with me because he was down on his luck and needed a place. This, after my divorce from his mother. I told him up front... "no drugs."

He did drugs.

The police came and I gave them the materials. I told him I was serious. The cops were willing to go by what I wanted; him out in 24 hours, or him arrested. His call. I told him any of his belongings left in MY house after 24 hours would be mine, so he'd better haul a** and call some friends and get moved out most rikky-tik. He did.

It cost me seeing my granddaughter... and I knew it would... but I won't be blackmailed, backed into a corner, nor taken advantage of. I've never been accused of being "vague." I told him "no drugs." He decided to test my resolve. Bad move.

I hate drug users, even those who "just" smoked "a" joint "just one time." To Hell with them and any who side with them... and as I said, the same goes for alcoholics.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 264 (view)
 
Does the size of the ring matter ?
Posted: 12/19/2008 6:09:08 PM
Opening Poster:

When I got married, a gazillion years ago, the "rule" was... as I studied on it, frankly... spend "at least" 10% of your GROSS (not net) income on the ring (set).

I actually said these words to a number of jewelry-store clerks:

"I'm sorry, I'd like to see something more expensive, please."

I loved the look on their faces when I said that.

I'm just glad I got married when I was a GS-07 instead of the GS-12 I am now.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 33 (view)
 
I'm Scared to Start a New Relationship!!
Posted: 12/19/2008 6:03:05 PM
Opening Poster:

"Living well is the best revenge."

1. Lose weight.
2. Buy a new Mustang.
3. Pick and choose at your leisure.

That'll be $185, please. See 'billing' on your way out.

You're welcome.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 79 (view)
 
I called my girlfriend a PIG by mistake... What do I do now?
Posted: 12/19/2008 6:00:25 PM
I realize I'm over-the-top harsh... like I actually care... but I just loved the "char" comment.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 68 (view)
 
I called my girlfriend a PIG by mistake... What do I do now?
Posted: 12/19/2008 5:27:50 PM

Sniper wow that is really harsh, are you speaking from experience????


Oh please. I should rub his belly and give him a doggy treat? Look, he f**ked up royally. If he only wanted happy-happy joy-joy replies, he shouldn't have posted his stupidity on the Internet. He called his date a pig... and "I" was harsh?
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 63 (view)
 
I called my girlfriend a PIG by mistake... What do I do now?
Posted: 12/19/2008 5:12:33 PM
Opening Poster:

You are NEVER going to recover from this INCREDIBLY STUPID MISTAKE. You are toast. Incredible toast.

There is NO cute thing, expensive gift, or deed, on your behalf, that will EVER get it out of her head that you called her a pig. You might try leaving a note and then killing yourself... but other than that, no, you're complete toast.

Even IF she was a moron and somehow forgave you... and she'd have to be a moron, because you don't deserve mercy... and you actually got together... for the rest of your life, at your worst moments, she'd remind you that you called her a pig. You could have called her a b**ch, whore, slut, child molester, or a bunch of other things, and stood a better chance of her getting over it than calling her a pig.

Toast. Definitely toast.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 64 (view)
 
Do you suffer from feeling out of their league?
Posted: 12/19/2008 5:06:06 PM
You guys who think you only attract the uglier girls because you are ugly are far from the truth. The prettier girls rarely do first contact. For every decent girl that msgs me i have 15 others that i feel insulted for thinking they had a prayer.


Well, on the Internet, there's nothing stopping anyone, woman or man, from contacting someone. Given that I only seem to get contacts from plump, corn-fed, plain, short, older women (and my God, I'm 51)... no, I think it's pretty much a given the GOOD-looking women aren't interested.

As for in person... I don't approach women. They all have it in their heads we only approach them to get laid and I just don't have the energy or inclination to spend my time convincing them I'm just interested in learning something about them... so f**k it, I don't bother. It's Internet or nothing as far as I'm concerned. The real-life crap is too much bull**t for me to put up with.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 62 (view)
 
What are Some Examples of True Love?
Posted: 12/18/2008 12:01:50 AM

What are Some Examples of True Love?


She buys me a rifle or a 10-day elk-hunting trip for my birthday. I'm sure I'd propose on the spot.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Do you suffer from feeling out of their league?
Posted: 12/17/2008 1:37:09 PM

Do you suffer from feeling out of their league? When you meet someone and are attracted to the person - have you ever felt simply "not good enough?"


No, I don't suffer at all. I just accept it. I'm a guy with Ferrari tastes trapped in a Rambler body. I know it, I accept it. I think a person can assess their own attractiveness by who they "draw" -- and in my case, well, I'm sure not drawing anyone pretty. Any woman who IS pretty IS automatically "out of my league." Just how it is. The best I can hope for, then, is a pretty one with brain damage who can get past my ugliness... but suffering? Hell no.

As to rich? So what. Education? I can converse with anyone on any level about anything. Languages? I don't give a damn what others they know as long as they use one I can understand when around me.


Would you then say that you are out of that person's league?


Other than stunning looks, on the woman's part, I would never say I'm out of anyone's "league."

I'm definitely not "suffering" about any of it, though.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 340 (view)
 
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 12/11/2008 12:52:24 PM
Per the subject question... I don't give a s**t if I swap bodily fluids with a woman ever again or not.

To those who cling to the "but that's how you express love" bulls**t... if that's the best you can do, it's pretty lame. Personally speaking, if that's all you bring to the table (with regard to a relationship), you're wasting my time... and yours.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 4 (view)
 
When our military men go away......
Posted: 12/11/2008 12:37:10 PM
Well, first, let me state up front, I'm quite biased. I've been in the Army Reserve nearly 27 years and just finished my second deployment to Iraq.

A lot of women cheat when their guy is deployed... and a lot don't. A lot of men cheat... and a lot don't. "Deployment" isn't the root of the problem (cheating), it's just an excuse for someone of weak characteer to use.

My personal take on the matter is this: If you're not inclined to cheat in the first place, deployments won't matter. If all "marriage" is to someone is a "free" (?) piece of a**, then that's going to be the nature of the relationship. Personally... I don't believe "a healthy sex life" is "required" for a marriage to work; I think there are a whole LOT of OTHER things that are "REQUIRED" for a marriage to work. If THOSE aren't there to begin with... then cheating becomes "no big deal."

It's hard to find a partner who is a "complete package." Most people, out of loneliness or "needing" (?) sex... will compromise personal values and core beliefs. I won't. Ever. At all. I also wouldn't cheat on my wife, if I had one, no matter how many times I was deployed.

Again, cheating, while deployed or otherwise, is just a manifestation of the problems already present in a relationship.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Seeing someone in public, how would you react?
Posted: 12/6/2008 2:21:04 PM
While in Baghdad this past year on my second deployment, I saw a woman from another singles site I'm on... working in the palace where I did. I said absolutely nothing to her. I'm not sure what I'd have said even if I wanted to say something: "Hello, I've seen your picture on one of the singles websites I'm on." Big deal. Just recognizing someone from the Internet doesn't give you the right to just throw yourself into their personal "space." I don't really care how others handle it, but that's my position. I sure as Hell wouldn't want some woman intruding on me for such a weak reason.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 619 (view)
 
Dinner Date - Who Pays?
Posted: 8/25/2008 12:29:34 PM

What do you folks think?


"If you can't afford the price of the drinks, don't belly up to the bar." ~ Cowboy Proverb

Mister, if you couldn't hack the costs, you should have kept your mouth shut.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 490 (view)
 
Do men like it when women contact them first?
Posted: 8/18/2008 10:41:15 AM

Do men like it when women contact them first?


If they're tall, slender, non-smoking, Republican, anti-abortion, and like guns and hunting... yes.

Otherwise, no.

Interestingly, though I'm pretty specific in my profile, I keep hearing from short, fat, cigarette-smoking Democrats who hate guns and hunting and think nothing of killing unborn children. I just figure they're products of a failed school system and, therefore, can't read and/or follow instructions.
 sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 132 (view)
 
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 8/5/2008 12:24:22 PM

Do hearts harden with age?


From age? No.

From having your guts stomped out repeatedly, endless rejections, countless heartbreaks, and so on? Yes.
 sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 105 (view)
 
whats your biggest fear
Posted: 7/31/2008 1:15:46 PM

What's your biggest fear?


I have three, and that's all.

In no particular order of importance, because they're all equal in that regard:

1. Being eaten alive.
2. Burning to death.
3. Drowning/suffocating.

(Yes, I know, #1 and #3 can be combined by a shark attack... which is why I haven't gone into the ocean since seeing "Jaws" in the theater a gazillion years ago.)
 sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 191 (view)
 
Do men like it when women contact them first?
Posted: 7/21/2008 12:05:17 PM

Do men like it when women contact them first?


Only if they've really read my profile. I'm pretty burned out on random number-generated contacts just for the Hell of it.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 131 (view)
 
Tall=Intimidating?
Posted: 12/23/2007 9:14:11 AM
The other "tall" thread in the Over 45 area wasn't enough? Hellfire, let's just start a "tall" thread in ALL the gol-flippin' forums here!

Opening question(s):

1. No, I don't find tall women intimidating. I do find short women annoying, though.

2. I'm ONLY attracted to girls above average height... preferably, at least 5'8" tall.

Okay... on to the NEXT "tall" thread... wherever it may be.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Must Love Dogs...?
Posted: 11/5/2007 9:37:17 PM
****SNIPER
Is that all there is to it? Dogs? Guess that makes it easy......We all can assume your
opinion. Thanx for that


1. Assumption is the mother of all f**k ups.
2. All there is to what?
3. I thought this was going to be a thread about dogs; I like dogs, I love mine, and I enjoy reading how others feel about theirs. Tells me a lot about a person's heart, how he or she talks about his or her pet(s).
4. Ellipsis points are only three dots, except at the end of a sentence, then they're four.
5. Aside from your spelling, you're welcome.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 91 (view)
 
Do men look at ring fingers?
Posted: 11/5/2007 10:36:22 AM
I've never asked a woman if she's married and I never will. If she's got a ring on her finger, that's that. I thought I was pretty clear on that point, where I'm concerned, but maybe not.

Women are crafty, scheming, all-aware creatures. IF she's interested in me and IF she's not married, she'll work it into the conversation. If, as you say, we're standing there B.S.-ing about chit-chat crap... and I hate "chit-chat crap"... and I ask (I suppose I might actually ask this... "maybe")... "So, what have you been up to in the past _____ years?"... and, in her telling me, she hasn't worked in some way to tell me she never got married because she's been too busy with her career, or she was married but she's divorced now, or SOMETHING, then it's one of two things as far as I'm concerned.

1. She's off the market where I'm concerned.
2. She's actually single, but too stupid to figure out a way to tell me -- directly or otherwise -- and I have no interest in, nor patience for, stupid women.

Either way, I'll take no "courting" interest in her.

Lastly, if I made it home alive, I wouldn't be at any parties... I'd be home drinking alone, dealing with my own private Hell.

And you want to know how "real life" welcome homes go? They're not all getting off the plane with the girl of your dreams waiting on the runway for you, jumping up and down like a maniac because she's happy as Hell to see you, no bra, mini skirt, high-heel five-inch stillettos with fishnet hose with the line that runs up the back... "the great 'welcome home f**k fantasy' to quote Joker in 'Full Metal Jacket'"... no, sometimes you fly into a deserted Topeka airport at midnight on Valentine's day, bus to FT Riley, go through out-processing Hell for a week or so, then BUS EIGHT HOURS HOME... or, rather, back to your unit, which is FOUR HOURS FROM YOUR HOME... and there's no one there you'd LIKE to have there to welcome you... just people "welcoming the troops home" (which, yes, IS nice, and appreciated)... but NO ONE SPECIAL... and after a few days of being stuck at your unit watching other boyfriends/girlfriends and husbands/wives kissing on each other, because you're stuck at the GOL-FLIPPIN' UNIT TO "DECOMPRESS" THANKS TO SOME 82D AIRBORNE GUYS WHACKING THEIR WIVES WHEN THEY CAME BACK FROM AFGHANISTAN, SO THE ARMY DOESN'T WANT "THAT" TO HAPPEN AGAIN... SO, "MANDATORY" STAY-AT-THE-UNIT, THREE-DAY DECOMPRESSION "TRAINING"... and THEN they let you go... alone... to drive four hours home, to see your Mom and Stepdad and your Lab who had NO idea where in the Hell you've been in the past year. Then, after staying with the folks for a week, you go home... "home" home... and stay inside, only walking your Lab at night... to avoid as many civilians as possible who don't know what the f**k you've been through... and, a month later... you enter a Super Wal-Mart and go into "culture shock" at all these people who don't know there's a war on terror going on.

It's really true. America isn't at war. The military is. America is at the mall.

And I leave to go back for another year this coming Saturday. Yeehaw.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 15 (view)
 
do u have success or attract the type of people u want
Posted: 11/5/2007 8:26:51 AM
Per the subject question... no. I'm a guy with Ferrari tastes stuck inside a Rambler body.

In short, no, I am not attracting Ferraris.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 89 (view)
 
Do men look at ring fingers?
Posted: 11/5/2007 8:20:55 AM
I wear my family's signet ring on my left ring finger, which is the traditional hand. I wonder if anyone's confused it with a wedding ring? I can't see how that would be easy, considering the type of ring it is.


You can't? Really. Let me help. This is just ONE scenario of a gazillion possible scenarios.

Your boyfriend was involved in a major battle to destroy one of the strongholds used by insurgents in Iraq. He and his best friend were involved in a major firefight. His friend got wasted; as he was dying in your boyfriend's arms, tears streaming down both of their faces, the dying soldier uses his last bit of strength to pull the ring off his finger, telling your boyfriend how (fill in your favorite story involving the dying guy's uncle, father, grandfather, a special college professor, whatever) ... and dies before he can finish taking off the ring. Your boyfriend, understanding how SPECIAL this ring is, and how his friend really wanted him to have it... finished taking it off his dead friend's finger.

Speed forward.

You're DAMN special to your boyfriend. You're the greatest thing to come along since whatever sliced bread replaced. You put sparkle in his eyes and song in his heart... even when you're not around. Bla bla bla. He wants to marry you... but, he doesn't want to buy you some "bland" gold ring with a diamond or two or sixty in it, he wants you to have a ring that MEANS something to him! So... he explains the story of his dying friend's last wish, and you're not the wimpy-a** squeamish type of dame who finds such things (a dead man's ring on your finger) revolting... you are one of the few open-minded, "enlightened" women on the planet who sees how sweet (yes, I said "sweet") of a moment this is for your boyfriend and... you accept. So now, you're at the mall, shopping for whatever you women buy at malls, and you catch some guy's eye and he takes an interest in you. However, as stated in a previous post a little above this one, he does "the scan" and sees your "dead guy's ring" on your ring finger and... that's that. You must be married. History. "Next!" Write-off. "'X' marks the square." You are no longer the blip on his radar screen you were just a second before... all because you're wearing your family's signet ring on your ring finger, even though you're as single as "single" gets.

It's a simple "yes" or "no" thing. There's no gray. "Ring on ring finger" = married/committed/taken/occupied/doesn't-want-guys-hitting-on-her-because-she's-sick-of-being-hit-on/... et cetera.

I don't care what the ring is. If it means something to you, I'm as happy as a pig in slop about it. Your family's signet ring. Marvy. However, I don't know "family signet rings" from jack squat and I'm NOT going to ask you "Hey, is that some kind of funky wedding ring with a war story behind it?" I'm just going to erase you from short-term memory and never look at you again. Period.

Look, women, if you want to be "considered available," don't wear a damn ring on your ring finger.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 77 (view)
 
Do men look at ring fingers?
Posted: 11/4/2007 4:56:55 PM
Per the opening question... yes. It's the second thing I look at, after I've sized her up as being reasonably attractive. If there's a ring on her finger, that's it. I don't care if it's not a wedding or engagement ring... if there's "A" ring on her "ring finger," I won't have anything to do with her, socially speaking.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Must Love Dogs...?
Posted: 11/2/2007 3:36:11 PM

I thought this was "another" dog thread. So glad it's not.


I was hoping it was. So sorry it's not.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Hunting and dating on POF
Posted: 10/27/2007 8:13:13 AM
I did a search to see if this had been asked before and I didn't find anything.

So here is my question. This is to guys who do now or did in the past, post pictures of themselves with deer, quail, bears, etc that they had killed (not asking about fishing). I really am curious and please ladies, I am not asking this question so you can post about how gross or attractive you think it is, etc.

Men, if you have or do post pictures of yourself with your "latest kill", do you get responses from women? Are they positive or negative?

The reason I am asking is because I think those pictures are cool to other men and not as inviting to most women, even if they don't mind hunting. But, we all have our opinions and since I am not a guy with pictures like that on a dating site, I really have no idea if I am correct or way off base.

Like I said, not asking ladies weather they like seeing these pictures, I am asking the guys what their experience has been on this dating site, to these pictures if they had them posted now or in the past.

Thanks for your feedback guys.


Just found this when doing a search for "hunting" hoping to find some women who hunt.

First off... thanks for asking.

I post pictures of my life. I hunt and I shoot. That's pretty much it. I have no interest in "ball" sports of ANY kind. So... I have pictures of myself with some of my kills from my hunts. I post them to filter out women who would not hunt with me and to attract women who would, pure and simple. It seems to work quite nicely, to be honest.

Thus far, I largely get messages from women who can't spell, compose clear sentences, and are too lazy to use the shift keys on their keyboards. They lock the caps down, then "scream" at me about how mean and horrible I am... et cetera and so forth. It varies, but I get about two a month from this site, and pretty much the same frequency from other singles sites I'm on.

On "rare" occasion, I get a message from someone who DOES hunt... but she smokes, isn't attractive, is overweight, too old for me, or something like that. It's not that I just want a woman who hunts, I want a total-package woman who hunts. Otherwise, I'll stay single, by choice. Better that than be with someone who b**ches about my hunting, or "allows" me to hunt (I BEG your pardon, "ALLOWS" me???) while she stays home. I'm already alone; I see no logic in getting into a RELATIONSHIP so I can STILL be alone.

What I don't do is post pictures of me with my souped-up 2005 Mustang. I love my Mustang, but it's not "my life." I'm not interested in finding a woman who wants to ride around in my car; I AM interested in finding a woman who wants to go shooting and hunting with me. So again, I post pictures of "my life." I hunt, I do cowboy action shooting, I do ALL types of shooting with ALL types of firearms, and I want a woman who will "share" (I mean "SHARE") my interests, not just "support" them. If I wanted "support," I'd hang out at AA meetings.

So yes, I get quite a lot of negative (read, "hateful," threatening, insulting) feedback... but that's okay. My "filters" are working. I'm clear in my profile what I want in a woman and I'm clear in my pictures what I look like (not all that handsome, but I'm realistic about it) and what I do. Any woman getting involved with me will know EXACTLY what she's getting into. I don't lie, put on "airs," or play games. I'm a "hit it an' git it" kind of guy. I'm about as honest and up front as you're ever going to find in a man.

That's that.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 84 (view)
 
Why do you think men don't cry?
Posted: 10/26/2007 8:07:31 PM
I don't have a problem crying... I just won't ever cry again over a woman who leaves me. I will, however, gently and lovingly wire six pounds of C4 to her car's ignition.

After you've had enough women stomp your guts out and rip your heart to shreds, it's really hard to cry over, for, or because of, any more of them.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Things that touch your heart.
Posted: 10/25/2007 6:58:29 PM
Puppies. Kittens. Babies. Babies giggling. Babies crying... with healthy lungs... and not from starvation, injuries, or disease, but merely because they're tired or they need their diapers changed. Cool, crisp, Autumn days. Mountains. Supreme acts of selfless bravery... the doe who, conflicted between escaping the hunters who were after her, stopped long enough to make sure her fawn was still on her heels. (No, I didn't shoot her; "no women with kids" is a hunting rule of mine.) Faced with possibly losing her own life, she was fleeing... but stopped to make sure her child was still with her. I love mothers that way, both human and animal. Soldiers I've seen who were scared to death of __________ and did __________ anyway... though you could read the raw fear on their faces and see their hands tremble (no exaggeration). A young person of any age helping an old person of any age because the latter's body just doesn't work like it used to. People who publicly admit their wrongs and apologize with absolute sincerity, knowing full well they will face incredible humiliation after doing so. Veterans helping veterans. People who nurse sick animals back to health. People who adopt homeless animals. People who give of themselves anonymously, for no other reason than "to give."
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 221 (view)
 
Must not do drugs....?
Posted: 10/21/2007 7:58:09 AM

... what about people who smoke cannabis? do you consider cannabis a drug?

And if you use this contact restriction, why do you use it?


To answer these questions:

I don't want to be around anyone using drugs as a crutch to get through life. I use the restriction because anyone using drugs (to include smoking pot) has a behavior I loathe... to include someone who just "experimented with it in high school." I want nothing to do with such people.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 19 (view)
 
What are those UNIQUE qualities you may offer to a partner?
Posted: 10/16/2007 8:47:49 PM

What are those unique qualities do you posess? And you feel your partner will click on them? Statements honesty, no games, nice guy/girl, I pay my bills are not way too unique. Anything that you feel they really need be fascinated with?


What's it to you, anyway? You're just here for the forums.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 10 (view)
 
my boyfriend joining the army What i do?
Posted: 9/9/2007 5:11:16 PM
jen1983:

The fact you even posted this makes it clear you should dump him immediately. I read through all of your post, then read it again just because I couldn't believe you actually wrote what you did and had to make sure I'd read things correctly. I had. So, if you have ANY feelings for this guy, dump him NOW. Do NOT "try to make things work" because I guarantee they won't. You've revealed your "true self" with your opening post and you should kick this guy to the curb. You'll be doing him a huge favor.
 Sniper308
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 112 (view)
 
is it wrong to end relationship over abortion?
Posted: 9/4/2007 9:33:34 PM
To the OP:

I don't even START relationships with women who had abortions. I don't even date them. I want nothing to do with any woman who has ever had one.

You can take from this what I think of your decision.
 
Show ALL Forums