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yellowcotton

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 25 (view)

Think I'm safe? Need a comp genius Posted: 2/13/2009 12:48:25 AM
try http://www.dattebayo.com/. Wish they still had Naruto!

yellowcotton

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 19 (view)

Searching for a new laptop...need suggestions from all Posted: 2/13/2009 12:27:28 AM
Hey, watch the cracks about housewives with tin ears. I have had Macs for the last 20 odd years and having listened to a friend cursing their new Vista driven pc, my only advice is, "Go with a Mac". Get in with the new macbook, then sell it in 11 months and buy a new one. Best way to avoid the plastic art after 3 year problem. They are pretty, people friendly,(learning curve is enough-had it with cells phones that come with a 157 page manual) and incredibly versatile. Quicktime beats DIVX any day. If you are into creating as apposed to mass sites, go with a mac. As for customer service, a couple of years ago, they had a problem with their motherboard. When I lost the first, they covered it and I had it back in 10 days. When the second one went, they sent me a new computer-not a new G3, but a new G4! God bless their little Mac eyes.

yellowcotton

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 15 (view)

there must be a moment of truth, when reasons fall away Posted: 12/7/2008 4:49:21 AM
Unless you are trained to respond, it is quite natural to be startled by an untoward event. It doesn't mean you are a coward.

yellowcotton

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

there must be a moment of truth, when reasons fall away Posted: 12/3/2008 12:39:54 AM
Being 58, I was raised with a lot of ideas around me, that were obviously just based in fear of the unknown other. I don’t believe in programming. We all have brains to chose our own actions, in the final hour. I am sure there are intensive brainwashing methods. Maybe these guys were a product of them. But there are too many incidents of genocide, where people have just been caught up in a frenzy of killing. Drugs, maybe, but they seemed to be too efficient. Maybe there are drugs out there, which distance one from feeling anything, yet allow someone to follow a trained plan efficiently. A possibility. But, peer pressure doesn’t cut it for me, nor does ‘being taught from childhood’. We can be taught that only we know ‘the way , the truth and the light’, but that isn’t enough to make someone hurt someone else, because they do not. It is the act of cold blooded murder on unknown ordinary people, which has a life of it’s own. When faced with a room of old men, children eating their dinner, families on their way home from work or school, how can they pull the trigger? What stops them from seeing just people like themselves? What stops them just putting their arms away and walking away? Hatred can be taught. Experience can teach us anger. But cold blooded violence is the monster. I still don’t understand. There must be more to it. A feeling of empowerment? But at what cost. Surely the rush can’t be worth it. How can someone be that callous! Are these people F..d up.? Or are they ‘normal’ people, who have accepted, and get off on the monster?

yellowcotton

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

there must be a moment of truth, when reasons fall away Posted: 12/2/2008 1:21:27 AM
There is only one question to be asked. It was the question I asked a friend the Sunday morning after Mumbai, “When facing a group of defenseless, unknown people, with a gun or a bomb in your hand, there must be a moment of truth, when reasons fall away, and one is just faced with the act itself. How, Why can anyone just start killing? That to me is the question. That is the moment of decision, the moment evil happens, the moment I just can’t understand. People are baffled by evil. George Lucas tried to understand it, describe it, and failed. I understand Christine Amanpour has done a documentary on genocide, probably to try and make personal sense of it, to name just two. In my own personal life, I have seen incredible cruelty. An old lady victimized by a new landlord, trying to get her out of a rent controlled flat. An unscrupulous man, who told a dying woman, who just wanted to go home, that she would do as he said, or she would never see her husband again, all to preserve their home for himself. A thirteen year old boy trying to pull a cat apart on my front yard. These are all moments of decision. What happens to our brain and our sensibility, during our moments of cruelty, of evil?

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 389 (view)

18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man? Posted: 7/5/2008 1:01:52 AM
Since when does whom we love, have anything to do with common sense? Common sense just comes into it later, when you use it in the relationship, to smooth the day to day. Be happy, Solar panel. If you find someone you care for, who cares what age they are, if they have 6 heads or what the neighbours think? And, as you said, everything in life has a countdown clock. Better to live and enjoy and worry about the end , when it comes.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 22 (view)

Domestic violence and the legal system...How has it treated you? Posted: 6/29/2008 9:47:14 PM
When it comes to abuse, either physical or psychological, I think your best bet, is to get yourself a nice, big dog. The courts and the police are hardly pro-abuse. They just can’t be there 24/7, and they know it.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 40 (view)

Sexual Innuendos and Hands On - When is it too much? Posted: 6/29/2008 9:30:51 PM
I always feel rather sorry for the poor things. They obviously have all the sophistication of a grade 6er. I change the topic, give 'em a hint it is rather boring, and if they do it again, start looking for an exit.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 275 (view)

Canada ban on Perfumes Posted: 4/6/2008 4:39:14 AM
There is a simple invention that counters dirty bodies. It is called soap and water. And the problem is not scent, but artificial scent. Anyone, staying in my home, is given a bar of unscented goat's milk soap, and they do not smell. In fact, they end up with soft skin. My hair is washed in a shampoo of camomile flowers and bark, which I have been using for 30 years, and at almost sixty, it is soft and shinny. And I use gardenia oil, as a scent. I love the smell of gardenias. REAL GARDENIAS. It has never caused a reaction in anyone I know. Before a friend insisted that I transplant my rose tree from my studio, where it had been living happily for 3 years, to my garden, the whole lower floor of my home smelt faintly of roses. And did you know that after some study(no, I cannot footnote it, because I can't remember who it was), the most arousing smells to a man are cinnamon and natural female? Why fill our world with fake smelling, chemical toxins, when we have the real thing? Answer:Money! They are cheaper and some big businesses love to sell ideas, not product, when people don't take the time to think it through. The adds you see on TV, are not of enclosed laboratories, but of wide open fields, filled with real flowers. If we all are so addicted to artificial scents, why don't they advertise their products, by using pictures of the labs where they are created? Call a spade a spade, and then sell it. We have to think, to protect ourselves and our neighbours.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 259 (view)

Canada ban on Perfumes Posted: 2/12/2008 5:45:48 PM
I am not bothered by 'perfumes', but by artificial scent, which is a relatively new product. It is in most soap, detergents, air 'purifiers'(there's a joke),lotions etc etc. This is not only about me or others like me. These things are poisons, period, just as tobacco is. The only difference is, it is just becoming known. And you do have a point. If I reacted as instantly and as badly to cigarettes, I would not smoke, and I would not be endangering my health. But at least I am doing it , with my eyes wide open, by choice. Many are unaware of the long term health risks of these products. They are accepted as part of our everyday existence, just as paint solvents, carbon monoxide and herbicides were. That does not mean that we should remain ignorant of their dangers or endanger others unnecessarily. After all, how important is it, that our laundry smell like fake lavender, our hair smell like (not) fresh herbs and we smell like goodness knows what, with a fancy name, that chokes up some of our neighbours. How attractive is that? Personally, I rather like a man who smells like a man.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 252 (view)

Canada ban on Perfumes Posted: 2/11/2008 2:38:29 AM
I guess the difference in our attitudes is that I never inflict my second hand smoke on others in public or in their private spaces. I do not feel I have that right.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 249 (view)

Canada ban on Perfumes Posted: 2/10/2008 7:18:40 PM
I can't go to indoor concerts, movies. I gave up my subscription to our local ballet company. Dining out is very iffy. Even private parties can be trying. I have to get up at 4 am to get into a space, before the place becomes intolerable to work in. So much I enjoy is now out of my reach. Thank you 'One blend' for your clear and informative post. I cannot even speak about this issue, without getting angry. I have lost so much of what I enjoy, and I want it back, but I would also like people to understand what they are doing to themselves.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 232 (view)

Canada ban on Perfumes Posted: 11/26/2007 3:20:41 AM
I am a little confused, whisperer. Somehow the point was missed. Those who react immediately to artificial scents, may be the lucky ones, as they avoid them in their living/home environnement. The problem with some artificial scents, is not so much that they are an allergen, but that they are a poison, and poison affects everyone! And it's effect is not always instantaneous. Should we allow our children to suck on lead painted toys, if they do not immediately show signs of severe lead poisoning? Ongoing reasearch is proving a link between artificial scents and cancer. Artificial scents are not the only 'perfume'. They are a recent, cheap alternative to perfume. But, as they are proving to be both toxic, and the most widely used, banning 'perfumes' seems to be the best solution, until they, and their lavender/mango/springtime fresh cousins in various cleansing and personal products are taken off the market entirely. And I do think that NatC is owed an apology. Telling someone that their condition is,"all in one's head" is pretty rude.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 230 (view)

Canada ban on Perfumes Posted: 11/25/2007 10:10:23 PM
What can an allergist do against a poison? If you are going to be terribly rude, you should at least think first, or it will only reflect back on you. Reading the posts in this forum has been a rather sobering experience; one that makes me glad that there is one 'governing' body whoes job it is to inform itself, with the intent to protect the rights of it's citizens, all of it's citizens. Most people are totaly unaware of what they are doing to themselves. They fall for the hype, without thinking. NatCe is quite correct. The problem is not natural scents, as much as artificial scents. They are everywhere and studies have been done that link them with cancer. I wish I could quote them or give you their urls, but if you wish to inform yourself, a google search should prove quite enlightening. Artificial scents are not a problem of the few, but of the many.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

Molded in-ear headphones. I know they are a bad idea but.... Posted: 11/22/2007 2:51:43 AM
Had to thank you again for the information on Headphone.com. I spent 2 days checking out every available local store, Sennheiser Canada and online sites to acquire the Sennheiser full ear clip-ons. They are not being distributed in Canada and, I discovered, most US audio sites no longer ship here. Even Amazon let me down. Then I read your response on POF and phoned Headphone, and bang-Koss’ are on their way. They will be a few days getting here, because it is Turkey time in your country,(we celebrate Thanksgiving in October) but they are on their way. Have bookmarked them and head-fi.org for future contact. What a hassle. Now I can get back to other things. Be well, jane

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

Molded in-ear headphones. I know they are a bad idea but.... Posted: 11/15/2007 4:33:40 PM
I am using them in an empty gym; just me, myself and I. At this point, just interested in the general type, canalphones, as you pointed out. I hate the idea of sticking anything in my ears, but they are convenient. Tested them out this morning, and they weren't bad(sound quality aside) They did not fall out,as the ear bud type did. I will keep your suggestion of the Etymotic ER-4p's and if I can stand the mechanics of these for the next 2 weeks, will start thinking of saving for a higher quality sound. Other than the obvious fear of forgetting to turn my nano on, to check the sound volume is off, before I pop in the earphones, have you ever taken them out and found that the foam caps did not come along as well?

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

Molded in-ear headphones. I know they are a bad idea but.... Posted: 11/15/2007 3:55:04 AM
Ouch on the money, but I will look into your suggestions. I just purchased koss' Spark plug. The loose memory foam caps give me the creeps,but I can tuck their wires and my nano into a headband, which also serves to keep the ear pieces in place. Testing them this morning. Thanks for the info. jane

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Molded in-ear headphones. I know they are a bad idea but.... Posted: 11/15/2007 12:53:48 AM
Oh when will someone invent a wireless small headphone, with decent sound, that doesn't fall out, doesn't endanger your hearing and hopefully, won’t fry your brain? Ok, asking too much. I am in a position, where I have to use small headphones, which do not drop out, when I bounce up and down. Can’t use speakers. Recently purchased the in-ear type with a mold-to-your-inner-ear foam cap. The cap is not attached. The whole concept seemed mad to me. But what is one to do? They solve the problem. Before I stick these things in my ears(in about 2 hours) has anyone had any bad experiences using these gizmos?

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 150 (view)

Domestic Violence-Were you a Victim Posted: 10/19/2007 4:23:09 PM
Attah girl. The last day 'someone I knew' and I were together, he grabbed me by the throat and lifted me off the ground. He was a good guy, but he lost it for a moment. He was 6'5" and I am 5'3". I have never felt so helpless. Just as soon as he dropped me and I could breath again, I stood up and punched him square in the mouth. I had never hit anyone before, but it was a great punch and I knocked out one of his front teeth and broke the other. I will never punch anyone again. I didn't like it, but if someone -ANYONE- bullies you, even for a moment- give 'em what hoh back and then give up the relationship and go have a nice icecream and cry.-it helps. No one-No one has the right to hurt or be mean to someone else., and when people forget this rule, and we all have, it is horribly sad for everyone involved, after all, most abusers are just too afraid to be vulnerable and have a normal relationship, and while you can walk away from them, they can't walk away from themselves. The only power they have, is the power we give them.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

What is your personal fitness routine/workout regimen? Posted: 9/24/2007 10:40:34 PM
I am far from being as fit as I could wish, but one can be fit and still have a few extra pounds. If it is body fat you are worried about, stay away from sugar, salt, packaged food and eat the old fashioned way=fresh veggys, fruit, fish, grains. Use common sense. If you want breaded pork, fry it in olive oil and then season it with fresh lemon juice. It is all a matter of balance. Enjoy the food you eat and listen to your body. It knows what it needs. At 58 I am 118, which is fine with me. I suppose I could be 4 pounds lighter, but then, I would have to give up the evil chocolate chip cookie dough forever. Nah!

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 56 (view)

I m thinking about getting a dog Posted: 7/27/2007 2:31:52 PM
Dogs are great. Have rarely lived without one. If you live in a city, you have lots of options for help on the days you work long hours. There is doggy daycare-teenager/student near you who will pop in and walk them, /friends who like to jog and exercise outside. This is the first time I have ever lived alone and I thought I would have to give up having a dog, but with a little ingenuity, (and a few bumps along the way) one can work it out. But be prepared. They are expensive, time consumming and they always need to go out again, just when you have settled down for the night. But in return for a little patience, they are your friend for life and accept you as is. What more can you ask for.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 228 (view)

Why do men ruin relationships with video games? Posted: 5/26/2007 7:30:27 PM
Mnay years ago, I turned on my son's evil machine, just to fill in the time, until the clothes in the drier were ready. I think it was Final Fantasy 2. When the kids came home from school, I ordered pizza, and kept on playing to 10pm. I was at it again by eight the next morning. While grabbing some food for lunch, and I could hear it calling to me from the basement, the whole time I was in the klitchen. At five pm, there was a rebellion from the small fry. They wanted food, and not just cold cereal again. I realised something had to be done, so with incredible will power, I turned it off, and never went near another nintendo or X-box again. I am now 58 and a young friend just announced he had purchased a new Nintendo with wirless remote play, so the question is,"Can I trust myself near it?". I can think of many good reasons to sever relations with a guy, and have, but video gaming isn't on my list.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 54 (view)

Why is it so hard to get men to talk about their work? Posted: 4/22/2007 3:29:48 PM
[Okay work talk maybe boring , but it talks about you as a individual . Goals what you plan on doing . ] Yep. How can you even begin to understand someone, unless you understand why they are doing what they are doing? As for salary, it is just impolite to ask financial questions. Not what I had in mind at all. In a perfct world, we would all make the same salary, as long as we took pride in, and did our work, no matter what it was. That would sure ruffle some feathers. As for goldiggers, if she tells you are wonderful, on the first date, after checking out what kind of credit cards you have-it is kind of a hint. LOL But how are you going to hide that fancy car and $500 sunglasses.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 32 (view)

Why is it so hard to get men to talk about their work? Posted: 4/20/2007 2:05:13 PM
Well I did ask! Got a lot of chuckles, even if it has made me a little paranoid now, about saying those obviously dreaded words, "And what do you do?." By the way, my eyes don't fog over, that is just the smoke from my brain, trying to understand, but I have found it is well worth it in the end. I wish I could have been a fly on the ceiling, when ibechuck told the poor, unsuspecting girl he, " played with things that went boom."

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

Why is it so hard to get men to talk about their work? Posted: 4/19/2007 6:37:19 PM
Reply toMsg 7 Movies are great, but I prefer the real thing. What we do is central to us. I like hearing about it, in detail. It is easy to turn the conversation, if my head begins to fog over, and I can hardly blame someone for boring me, when I initiated the topic. Thanks for your feedback.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

Why is it so hard to get men to talk about their work? Posted: 4/19/2007 6:18:16 PM
reply to Msg 3 I have to admit, something like this did occur to me. Shame really. If someone doesn't stand behind what they do or what they want to do, I definitely veer away. Deceit is such a bore.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 8 (view)

Why is it so hard to get men to talk about their work? Posted: 4/19/2007 6:14:03 PM
Reply to message 5 Maybe hard for me to understand, but never boring, and rather a challenge for you to explain. Glad you would try though. Thanks.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Why is it so hard to get men to talk about their work? Posted: 4/19/2007 6:10:13 PM
That is breaking it down, is it? LOL

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Why is it so hard to get men to talk about their work? Posted: 4/19/2007 5:08:09 PM
I am actually interested in how people spend their time. What do we all do during our days. I have found that men(since I have been speaking to men, I can only use them as an example) do not want to talk about their work. They will flirt, talk about movies, talk about their dogs, but shy away from what they realy do. Why? What am I missing?

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 47 (view)

Shootings at Virginia Tech Posted: 4/16/2007 2:30:02 PM
I am 58 and I have seen too many lonely kids growing up without a family. Our generation were horrible parents. Kids can't grow up alone. Does any one know if it was another kid. Or was it worse. I live in Montreal, and we have had too many of these scenes. Last time I looked, we were still in Canada. I just feel sick, having to see it and hear it all again. it is so sad.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 168 (view)

Canada ban on Perfumes Posted: 4/15/2007 2:22:11 AM
I have to admit, I am flabbergasted. I thought people were just not aware of the problem. Artificial scents are such a frivolity, yet to argue that it is one's right to force them on others, endangering some and making countless others uncomfortable? I am afraid I just don't understand.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 13 (view)

Building Bone density - which sports are best ? Posted: 4/14/2007 5:48:55 PM
Once a day, try lifting your heels off the ground, and then releasing, so you bang lightly on the floor. Repeat 10 times. Bones respond to stress.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 158 (view)

Canada ban on Perfumes Posted: 4/14/2007 5:38:32 PM
"All you're going to do is end up living like a controlled bunch of little robots. But you'll be "safe" and "healthy"." But it is not your safety, that is at risk, in this case, is it? I have noticed a great decrease in the consciousness of people for others. I am very pleased to have a government, that will step in, when some of it's citizens do not seem to understand respect or care for each other. The world is getting smaller, and we must live, in close range, with each other. If we do not care for each other, but only think of ourselves, well it is going to be one heck of a mess.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 147 (view)

Canada ban on Perfumes Posted: 4/13/2007 6:23:37 PM
I am no puritan, but yesterday I had to get off a bus and walk in blowing rain, because a woman across from me decided to douse herself in scent. Is that fair? Is it fair that I had to give up going to indoor concerts or the ballet, opera, theatre, even restaurants, because someone else thinks they should be free to pollute a public environment? Is it fair that I have to leave my own deck, in my own backyard and go inside, on a beautiful day, because my neighbour wants to have her laundry 'spring time fresh' and its exhaust chokes me up? Before most people even leave the house in the morning they have been hit by scented soap, shampoo, conditioner,deodorant, moisturizer, shaving cream, (mousse) and their clothes have been 'lavenderized',(Detergent) and 'spring time freshened'(dryer sheets) Call me an idiot, but if it makes me caugh, and feel sick, I kind of think it might be bad for me.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 178 (view)

artistic/creative people and relationships Posted: 4/7/2007 10:38:03 PM
Nick said "I think that a key issue in relationships between people in creative professions (and their non-traditional work models) and people in traditional 9-5++ "physically demanding" jobs, is that many of the latter fail to see "work"/effort which is not based on traditional notions of what consistitutes (in their minds) "work" or "hard work", thus creating the potential for rifts in the relationship." Boy does this ring true. I haven't worked in a while, but when I was working on a project, at a certain stage, I ate, slept and breathed it, in my mind, wherever I was. I couldwalk by someone, respond to a question, smile, and never remember I had spoken to them. It spooked people when they realized. Others just didn't get it. Some actually got jealous and did what ever they could to 'snap me out of it'. Weird. I like artists as friends. They are comfy because they understand. But that doesn't mean they aren't practical. They have to be to survive. Just not all the time LOL. As for a relationship, opposites attract. I want someone who is grounded in this world-solid-practical-the way I am when I am not creating/dreaming, (and truly alive) But they better have a sense of humour, because I know I will drive them crazy.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Can I connect my mac to satellite using a video converter(canopus advc110) Posted: 4/6/2007 11:38:44 PM
Have both types of cable. Guess I will lose a fair bit of quality, then. Oh well. Thanks for taking the time and effort to help. I really do appreciate it.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

Can I connect my mac to satellite using a video converter(canopus advc110) Posted: 4/6/2007 4:29:46 PM
I think you have just answered my first question, which was, "yes, you can connect the satellite box to the canopus." Correct? I am no audio/video/wiz so bear with me. That is the satellite box, not the TV, right? And using which cables?

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Can I connect my mac to satellite using a video converter(canopus advc110) Posted: 4/6/2007 3:02:06 PM
My tv is down and I want to connect my mac G4 (panther) to my satellite dish via a Canopus ADVC110 video converter. I have a large collection of VCR tapes and bought this a couple of years ago to convert them to DVD, to save space, and archive an extra copy. I have only used it for this. Now I can’t find the user's manual, darn. Can’t seem to find a downloadable copy on Canopus’ site. Their forums are down. Googled 'Canopus satellite connect'. All to no avail. Tivo is of course a better(adequate memory) pvr, but this is a temporary thing. I don’t want to connect it without making sure I won’t mess up the canopus, which I still need for it’s original use. Can any one help?

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

Pierre Elliot Trudeau - a study in leadership. Posted: 2/15/2007 3:51:28 PM
Trudeau was an elitist. ‘King’ was the operative word. He didn’t believe “in the little people’, he believed people were little, so little that he didn’t trust parliamentary government. He was terrified of social chaos, as his behaviour during the FLQ crisis exhibited. He established rule by committee, not by elected members of parliament. Many leaders have charisma. Big deal. Hitler had charisma, and look at the harm he did. I am ashamed he was ever elected.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 8 (view)

Abusive Relationships Posted: 2/9/2007 4:25:55 PM
The first thing you have to do is get over the guilt that this was in any way your fault. You didn't make a bad choice. He behaved badly. You can't control how others behave, only yourself, and abusive people do not go around with "I am abusive. Choose me" on their T-shirts. It takes time to come out. You know all men are not abusive, with your brain. Take time with any man you meet. Time will tell all about someone. Let them earn your trust and you will be fine. Then you will begin to believe in them with your heart. And the old memories will go away. If not, there are a lot of groups around to help and literature. Abusers are creeps and liers and their favourite game is to shift the blame onto you. Don't believe it for a moment. Just say "toodles. Good riddance to bad rubbish" and move on. It is their trip, not yours.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 80 (view)

Anyone make a living from their art, or wish they could? Posted: 2/9/2007 2:52:48 PM
[Only two arts occupations ("producers, directors, choreographers, and related occupations," and "writers") earn the same as or more than the average earnings for the entire labour force; ] Wow, hope! With barely anything in the bank untill next Tuesday, my little studio too darn cold to work in for the last 4 days, thanks to 70km wind gusts, and trying to hold my temper as I get told repeatedly by relations to "get a proper job" or told to explain what it is I do, and why, being a real estate agent is looking better and better every minute. Of course, that will pass, just as soon as the wind stops and I can get back moving again. I do wish they would stop asking me why? Because I do not know! There is food in the cupboards and then of course there are always the dreaded sardines, but how do you define 'a living'. I sure don't see villas by the sea in my future. .

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 42 (view)

people who own dogs and kiss them Posted: 2/7/2007 2:51:59 PM
Not all dogs 'slobber'. And speaking of childhood memories, the grossest slobberer in my history, was a disreputable uncle. Now him I wouldn't even let near me for a peck on the head! And as for clean, in any objective contest, she would come out ahead of 90% of the people I have known. How many people's feet smell like Fritos, that you know? Any one, who has had a happy, friendly dog, learns that at certain times, it is wise to keep one's mouth firmly shut, and head tipped down, to avoid any unnecessary intimacies. Rather the same technique I have used at parties(G)

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 487 (view)

Why men wont date independant women Posted: 1/27/2007 2:37:05 PM
What struck me, while reading through many of the previous posts, is the fuzzy way independence is being used, without actually agreeing on a description of what is meant by independence. Some seem to think it is financial indpendence. Some seem to think it is not needing anyone else to 'make them happy'. Some seem to think it is mowing the lawn.(G) I have been finacially dependent, emotionally dependent, and gosh, any one who wanted to mow my lawn was happily received(G), but I have never questioned my independence, as a person, nor haev I questioned it while in a relationship with someone, whom I cared about, and who cared about me. I am putting this rather badly. Isn't dependency only an issue, when dealing with someone who is untrustworthy? And if one cannot trust someone, why be in a personal relationship with them? Marriage/love makes us immediately dependent and vulnerable.

Butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 22 (view)

Dinner party for 8 and I need some ideas!!!!! Posted: 1/26/2007 3:44:07 PM
It is cold where I am, soI am thinking indoor cooking, harty but light and make ahead, no stress: Salmon mousse(MA) with wine to start stuffed roast pork (MA) carrot and sweet potatoe casserole sweetened with maple syrup or a touch of honey(MA and warm at last minute) Large salad vinegrette frozen lime pie(MA)= tart and light sit down or buffet That was fun-now where did I put those fish sticks?

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 36 (view)

Old love Posted: 1/25/2007 6:07:23 AM
I agree. Some men are terrified of being ignored. Some are willing to go very far to get you to pay ANY kind of attention to them. If it is a mild case, it is upseting. If it is a severe case, it can get very dangerous. I have had both in my life. Don't give this guy a second of your attention. That is what he wants. Change your number. And until you know which cartegory, this guy falls into, watch your back. Goodluck, take care, j

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 33 (view)

Faith has left the building! Posted: 1/24/2007 8:11:06 PM
We may be forced to walk on cement, instead of the earth, scramble for a new computer every 2 years and yes, I do lust after the latest little tech gadgets, but these modern phenomena do not dictate my, nor, I think, others' attitudes to their very beings. One just has to watch kids, who were born into this world, to realise that their most important possession is their cell. They are constantly in touch and reaching out to each other. As for losing faith in relationships, or more accurately, in people, not a chance. I may have been cowardly, at times, but that is what it was, pure and simple. I hardly think it is fair to blame the world we live in.

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 21 (view)

Why Don't guys understand Just Friends Posted: 1/23/2007 4:54:51 PM
I hope, not being a guy, I can offer an opinion here. I recently asked someone the same question, but I think I already knew the answer. I wasn't being honest with myself, nor with the two men I had recently dated. I was protecting myself. And I was protecting them, when I realised, I wasn't attracted to them. But it was dishonest. You can't ask a guy to be a friend, who is attracted to you. It isn't fair to them. And I can't pretend I am only looking for a friend, when I am really looking for a friend and a lover. Take care,

butbutbutterfly

Joined: 9/1/2006

Msg: 471 (view)

Pitbulls Banned!!! Posted: 1/22/2007 9:15:12 AM
If all dogs should be banned from cities, because some individuals are violent, I guess that means that all people should be banned from cities as well, because every city contains some violent, aggressive individuals. Who comes next? An ant bit me, while I was sitting on my deck. Let's outlaw ants!

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