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Thread: What do men really want in a lass?

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 74 (view)

What do men really want in a lass? Posted: 5/13/2013 11:35:41 AM
well if they have a horse and a stetson, I would imagine they d like an 'o please Bob', and then they d feel like a proper cowboy..... Well I dont know I m a woman!!!!!!

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 31 (view)

If you are really remorseful for murder, do you deserve some compassion? Posted: 5/13/2013 8:48:50 AM
Two things, firstly assuming that was a non humorous remark BB, then thanks for saying what you did. Secondly, keyface, I have qualified my remarks by saying that I do not feel you could expect people close to the person killed to feel that way, and I have no way of knowing how I would feel if I d ever been in that position. Although saying that there are people who do seem to still have the ability to not be angry or seek revenge, when they have lost close family power, and thats show an incredible strength of spirit.. Hazell, having read the reports today, does seem a very lost soul, and a man who was unpleasant, selfish, and very wicked in what he did. I say 'lost soul' in this context, because part of what I wonder about in cases like this too, is how much of it is nature and how much nurture. What was he like as a child, as a two year old was he wicked person, or did environment and circumstance lead to the sad and evil man he s become now???? We all start lives as babies that are innocent and need protection, what leads to them then becoming men like Hazell or Philpott, and could they have been different??

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 23 (view)

It's Saturday - what are you up to? Posted: 5/11/2013 1:28:41 PM
BB is like a glow worm with his love for all of us.... Very useful in a power cut too, perhaps you should include it on your profile, its a USP, one of many I m sure....

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 9 (view)

Questioning the mentality of some on here Posted: 5/11/2013 6:37:01 AM
I hear counselling can be really good BB!! Otherwise try stand up, its so funny what you say...

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 3 (view)

Is there more than the birds and the bees that school sex ed should of told us about? Posted: 5/11/2013 4:22:49 AM
I m with Notts fella, 'fancy', but wont be tempted to get a bat for any oral activity it can perform. Perhaps the creative bods at Anne Summers will feel they have a new toy they could invent though, well we ve had rabbits of the rampant variety, now we could have a bat variation. Wondering what names or slogans we could come up with for that one.... Actually I m just wondering too, whether theres a kitchen application here too, keep yours eye open, Lakeland plastics may see some potential in its tongues mopping potential!!!!! I am obviously not suggesting the harming of any bats in the making of this product though...

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 20 (view)

If you are really remorseful for murder, do you deserve some compassion? Posted: 5/11/2013 4:14:16 AM
Its been interesting reading other posts, and I do see what a lot of you are saying, and perhaps at times I can appear too lenient, and I do look at my thinking. I was not in anyway justifying what he d done, and I think a lot of you are right in what you have said about his letter, I still would show him more compassion than others would, maybe because I hope that even if his remorse at the moment is centred more around him, in time he may realise more the full implication of what he s done, and understand his crime and its impact on others too. I do wonder why I see it like that, cos it puts me out of steps with many I know. I m certainly no Lord Longford, and I do not think certain criminals should be released because I would never want them to be able to be a risk to other children. However, Hams comment regarding religion, probably is where in part my views come from I grew up with the redemptive possibility of religion and the transformative impact that offered. I dont buy into all the religious stuff particularly now, but that overriding view of compassion and kindness as stayed with me, and left me I think with the view that if people are truly sorry then even if you dont totally forgive them, you do see them as people beyond the crime they have committed. I dont think you can do that if you are the person affected, although some people do. I know from the comments on here that many can feel no compassion, for me, whilst I hope not being totally naive or ever excusing people s wrong doing, its just has hard for me not to show some. I just think that that most people are not one dimensional, they are made up of many aspects, and I want to see if there is any good in them that can be brought out and focused on. I do realise there are people though, where that does not seem to be the case (Mick Philpott would even try my compassion!!!) It was a question too that whilst motivated by his letter, was trying to consider all cases where people have expressed remorse.

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 6 (view)

If you are really remorseful for murder, do you deserve some compassion? Posted: 5/10/2013 1:20:57 PM
He may well be manipulating, and he has been accused of murder and not manslaughter, and his letter would seem to suggest that he is trying to say that he is guilty of the latter not the former, and if he is manipulating then it could be for a lesser sentence, so I am conscious of all those things when thinking about this. In this case, the more evidence, and the more we learn about him, will hopefully help to create a picture of whether his remorse has any element of truth to it, and of that I m not absolutely sure at the moment. My point, whilst using his case, was more about other situations like this where remorse is shown, and whether that would affect our thinking. Whilst I understand and agree with you BB that Tia should have our compassion and her preeminence here, is in having justice for her life that was wrongly taken. However, because we dont have the death penalty, (and I do not want it either), we now have another life that we have to grapple how to deal with. So part of the complexity for me with this, is that if I think all people make mistakes, if some then make massive mistakes, that are undoubtedly very wrong and wicked, but end up wishing they hadn t ( whatever may motivate that thinking, and surely our prison systems is about encouraging the reformation of prisoners), that the fact that regret and sorrow is expressed by an accused person, which particularly if it continues with a conviction, does deserve some real consideration for compassion on our part. I said this once before in another thread, that for me to not show compassion if you think it may be deserved, for me diminishes my own humanity, and my understanding of other peoples humanity too. I dont think either that it takes away from the great sadness or loss I can feel that a young life was wrongly taken, and I m not advocating that he should not be imprisoned, but that we should look at the human person too that has commited the crime. As outsiders to a crime, and not the family or loved ones of the person who has been killed, I feel that is fair response.

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 1 (view)

If you are really remorseful for murder, do you deserve some compassion? Posted: 5/10/2013 11:09:33 AM
Stuart Hazell, who is accused of murdering Tia Smart, has written a letter to his Dad from Prison. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2322533/Tia-Sharp-murder-suspect-wrote-father-prison-claim-death-accident.html Obviously prison is not at all easy for him, and it is right if found guilty he should be punished. However, having read the letter, and obviously not knowing all the case yet, my question is, whilst still deserving punishment , if his expressed remorse is genuine in any way, could people find it in there heart to show some compassion towards him? Are some crimes though, too heinous for people to be forgiven, even if they express remorse? Sometimes in other cases of murder, papers will report of how the convicted person showed no remorse or sorrow for what they d done, which seems to imply to me that it makes their crime even more callous and then more wicked. So has Hazell has expressed feeling this, I wonder if it would make people view him a bit more differently. I suspect many will just say its crocodile tears, and all an act as he is scared and frightened now he knows what he must face in prison. My initial response, is to try to find out how genuine his contrition is likely to be, but if I did feel that it was, then I do think I would feel a measure of compassion for him. I do not see either that showing some compassion like that, downplays the tragedy that a young girl so unnecessarily lost her life, or that he should be fairly punished, but I would like to think that genuine remorse can be met with some measure of understanding towards his humanity, even if real forgiveness is not possible, and to be fair I dont think he would expect that.

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 6 (view)

Tone of voice Posted: 5/9/2013 3:48:40 AM
Yeah, I ve been put off by someone s voice and the way they express themselves. Its one of those things that, if you got to know someone through a social club or work, might get overlooked, but in a random meeting in the real world, or a chat on here, I think it is enough to be a deal breaker. Teeth would do it for me too, Popsicle, I do wish men would properly smile, as its not perfect teeth that I m looking for but clean teeth, which admittedly you cant always see on a pic, but you have a better idea. Dirty fingernails would deffo put me off too, although most men I think are ok with that one!!!! Its a shame though, because all of those hygiene cleanliness things, are things that can really be remedied, but how do you say to someone here s some floss and mouthwash, or would you like a nailbrush... Sexy voices are wonderful though, and really are very attractive.

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 13 (view)

Does anyone actually want a giant cock? Posted: 5/8/2013 9:50:07 AM
Well having now found out what the thread is really about it, and a penis was, I have to confess a much more interesting proposition!!! Why would you put a chicken on a plinth??? Odd choice indeed, although not sure what I d have in its place, but sure there are much more inspired choices than that one.. MT is not one BB, sorry but just no!!!!

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 17 (view)

My first POF date - a Steep Learning Curve Posted: 5/6/2013 3:38:46 PM
I filled out the half hour or so questionnaire for e-harmony, only to be told I couldn t join cos I was married (separated actually), but goodness knows why they couldnt have told me that before I took ages answering all their questions!!! E-harmony too, sends you matches, you dont get a chance to look not sure how I d feel about that.. Don t let it put you off Piper, I have always met nice men on dates, and generally had a nice evening, even if the all important lust factor wasn t really there. Reckon you just got unlucky, which I suppose is bound to happen on a site of this size. Hopefully your next date will be better..

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 34 (view)

Quirky Things You Find Attractive? Posted: 5/5/2013 1:01:18 PM
Hairy arms, legs, and chests are all good. Like tattoos, but not on the neck, pierced nipples look good too.. I like men with freckles on their arms and backs, and as someone else said certain shades of red hair are quite nice as well. I quite like a small gap between the front teeth too, well as with all things sometimes it works and sometimes it doesnt... Deep voices too, some men have voices that really draw you in, and are just so sexy....

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 245 (view)

Thatcher is Dead Posted: 5/3/2013 2:54:19 PM
Well I most definitely will be giving thought to moisturising the back of my neck Nottingham F, not an area I ve considered for such attention, front of neck, decolletage, and face, but not there... Amazing how Mrs T has in a roundabout way influence beyond the political, who d have thought a thread about her, would have possibly improved my beauty regime.....

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 8 (view)

Another star arrested Posted: 5/1/2013 9:30:22 AM
The message you are replying to: 'I think that the line is getting blurred between the actual very few celebrities who have a serious problem and have targeted children.....and the celebrities who had too much to drink at parties and misbehaved with underage groupies who were dressed to the nines and caked in make-up and looking a lot older than they actually were.' 'When I heard about this today, I very much said the same thing at work. I do think there is a fine line here.' Agree Chuzz and Jackhner. I also agree it is firstly as you said Chuzz that its difficult to prove when it happened nearly fifty years ago, but also you are trying men for crimes that they may have done in their youth, and which now, older, wiser, and living in very different times would perhaps not think of as ok now either. I m not saying that people shouldn t be brought to justice necessarily, (certainly its been necessary with many war criminals) but I do think some common sense as to be put into the equation with all these allegations of sex crimes, particularly as it was a very different era. I m not saying accusations of rape should be treated lightly either, but in this instance surely it would be one persons word against the other, unless there were witnesses to it, which in the context of the times and circles moved in, might be the case here possibly. Also, I do wish we would see that whilst we have laws in place about underage sex, in many ways its an arbitrary figure, and doesnt account for the fact that many girls are very womanly by fifteen, and that often are indeed sexual active from that age or before. Men who whilst older than them, and perhaps not ideal partner choices, are in many way doing exactly what their biology is telling them to do, which his mate with young healthy fertile females, and in that respect, I can see why men are attracted to girls that age. I m not as horrified by that attraction as some, but do understand as a culture we have evolved to understand that relationships with that sort of age difference are not really healthy ones for the people involved. I wish therefore that we would not label people who ve committed these sort of offences in the same way we would men who molest children who are pre puberty, or just entering their teens... To be honest, whilst I feel a bit guilty for feeling like this, if I m absolutely honest I m starting to feel very tired of all these allegations that keep appearing, as I m not convinced that they are all perverts, and it is perhaps taking the focus off someone like Jimmy Saville who was obviously very sick and dangerous in his sexual behaviour. I do think anonymity should be given too, until they are proved guilty. If they are innocent, and value their good names, and have partners, families, and grandchildren, then it must be very stressful for them to have to deal with all the media stories, when they have not as yet been proved to be guilty. This is a really odd one for me, as I feel that I should feel more incensed about it, but perhaps its just that twelve arrests so many years down the road, especially with certain people is quite a lot to take in.

Pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 32 (view)

Dull economics? Posted: 4/29/2013 3:54:01 AM
At least if you read an economic essay in the pages of playboy BB, it is still all figures!!!!!!!! Don t blame me for your swearing either, I was nowhere near you, I ve been batting my eyelids in a delightful and optimistic way, which has meant that unfortunately anymore naive words of wisdom I have with regards to economics have fallen by the wayside, hard work this batting you know!!!!!! Be even harder if I had a cricket bat as well, although whites could be a very flattering colour if we ever have sun to get a tan....

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 29 (view)

Dull economics? Posted: 4/28/2013 4:22:35 PM
'Pandora's delightfully optimistic naivety ' Hmmm, not sure how I feel about that remark, I ll perhaps delightfully and optimistically bat my eyelids whilst I think about it, but not in too naive a way!!!!! 'I'm beginning to suspect that capitalists can't perhaps be trusted........' Jo van, think you could have a point, for at least a fair few!!!

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 12 (view)

School hours and hols... Posted: 4/28/2013 3:03:26 PM
'a group of professionals that on the whole are dedicated, hard workers' Daver this is a thread about teaching and teachers, they are seen as a group of professionals, as are many others who train for certain jobs, with or without degrees, but I was referring specifically to them, and making no assumption about other people. I also, was just addressing the fact that they often seem to be criticised by the Media and certain politicians, I have not experienced that with the teachers I work with, nor with teachers I have as friends in other schools, nor the ones I dealt with during my three childrens education. That isnt to say there aren t some like you mentioned, that are in it just for the money, and don t really care about their students, that was why I said 'on the whole'. Nor was I implying that others are not dedicated or hard workers either in other professions. I hope that clarifies what I meant

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 26 (view)

Dull economics? Posted: 4/28/2013 2:45:52 PM
Daver, I have to confess I have not given much thought to your ass, but I m sure indeed it is a very smart and sassy one at times I was generalising about goods that are made to be replaced quickly, and I appreciate your point, although saying that I m sure at one times goods were made to last ten, fifteen years, with easy access to cheap parts, that made them worth fixing.. 'Your ideal of communism s never going to happen - each according to his needs? Whole new thread entirely' Thats the point its an ideal, that you strive for, but may not absolutely achieve, but if you believe in the principles of it, then aiming for it means then even if you miss the mark, you ll hopefully get the best you can. I m in favour of socialism not communism too. Always strikes me as strange as well, that the can do, optimism, and striving to achieve, features of capitalism, seem so defeated by the notions of sharing and caring, rather than the fittest surving. Go round the world, look at lots of different cultures, and you will find that many do care for the community as a whole, and realise that there well being lies in looking after the whole, not just their own individual/immediate families needs. Old Bill: I would like to say I didnt regurgitate any real economic facts, as I think may well be in evidence Not that what I said makes any less sense than if I had quoted lots of statistics and records etc. I argued for how I see it has one human being, responding to others that I share my world with...

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 24 (view)

Dull economics? Posted: 4/28/2013 2:14:12 PM
' I'm not against either money or property ownership. Money is a useful tool, in theory it allows the carpenter to make wooden things, the baker to bake bakery things and the doctor to apply bandages to cut fingers and burnt hands. It is more economical of time and effort for people to specialise in a trade rather than do it all for themselves. What better way then to have an exchange system for the value of an item rather than cart around a chair to the bakers for a loaf of crusty white. But we seem to have taken the concept too far and made up jobs. Then these people doing these made up jobs i.e. share dealers, have somehow become more powerful (by skimming of the top all the time) and ended up much more important than the carpenters and doctors and bakers (etc) The solution? No idea. Well I do, but it's unacceptable to most people, because it's called sharing. And humans have this unbreakable need to hoard as much for themselves and fvck their neighbour. Greed. We will continue to have all these problems and more until we kick the greed habit. Communism has been given a bad name by some greedt meglomaniacs. But then so has most religions been defiled by erm men. There is nothing wrong with communism. For anyone to automatically cite soviet USSR, china etc etc, they are either capitalists carefully trying to discredit the alternative, or lacking in real powers of critical analysis. Stalin and his like are from the same pot as any other leader who has lined his own pocket. I'm pre-empting the usual chorus here, in saying so, but you can't diss communism with examples of something which never was communism. In both russia's and china's case, so called communism only came about after bloody revolution, imposed on the masses by those victorious. True communism is about co-operation and sharing, somethings that as I've said, are sadly lacking in 99% of humans.' Good points, and flags up the confusion people make over true communist ideals, and I would add to that saying that socialism is not the same as communism, the latter I would say is a more extreme form of the former.

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 8 (view)

School hours and hols... Posted: 4/28/2013 12:33:56 PM
Mely, what I ll add in defence of teachers, ( seeing how it is for the ones at my school, in my role of Cover Supervisor) is that in a four week break, they would use a fair percentage of that time in school prep for the coming year, so they would be unlikely to have the whole four weeks off. Also it is an incredible stressful job, where often in each lesson you are thwarted by at least four or five (if not more) students whose main desire is to disrupt the lesson as much as possible. I can t think of many jobs where on an hour by hour basis, its rare that you are not up against people intent on wanting an entirely different set of objectives to you. However, I do see that there is also a possible argument that kids can get bored on such a long summer break, and that perhaps some may feel that six weeks is too long to be away from the discipline of learning and school work. As for a longer day, I m not sure students could maintain attention for at least another lesson, by the last period of the day they have generally had enough. In terms of students attitude to their learning, unless we can somehow shift how they see the worth of their education, and shift it away from targets and league tables, and really figure out how to enthuse them with a joy of learning, then I just feel too that adding an extra hour or so onto the school day, will be met pretty much met in the same way as the rest of the school day at the moment is by a lot of children, and I can t see it will do much to increase standards. Michael Gove should be a truly innovative Education Secretary, and actually listen to the people doing the job on a daily basis, rather than seemingly to be criticising whenever possible, a group of professionals that on the whole are dedicated, hard workers who I believe really care about the education of their students. I will just add too, that childhood should be a balance of being educated, but also being allowed to enjoy family time, play time, and learning through everyday experiences beyond the classroom. Any changes that people plan should keep that uppermost in their mind too, and how much pressure we should be placing on children as well IMO....

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 21 (view)

Dull economics? Posted: 4/28/2013 12:18:31 PM
I m absolutely no economist,( which will soon become very evident) but for me the some of the key things are: 1. We have a capitalist system which is happy to accept that the top 10% of wealthiest families are 850 times wealthier than the bottom!! 2. We also in our free market economy, have become far more consumeristic than we need to be, how many appliances are now made not to last, so we will have to buy newer, or bigger, or better in a year or so times. That just seems crazy to me. 3. Capitalism, as far as I m aware argues that all men have the right to better themselves and to become their own boss, and rich too should they choose to work hard etc, and have money to invest in the first place. However, even if this was the case, and a totally unlevel playing field comes to mind in terms of this notion of equal opportunities, there are only so many consumerist doors that can be opened, and if you gatecrash one, then another person already through it is then likely to be evicted... that metaphor makes sense to me, hope it does to others??? 4. Capitalism seems to have to have cycles of boom and decline, hmmm, and who is it often suffers most at times like this?? I dont understand the maths or the pragmatics of all this, and whilst I m not going totally down the road with Marx, I do feel that socialism puts in place questions that need to be asked, and solutions which whilst not perfect either, do offer a more egalitarian alternative. Personally, I d take a leaf out of Buddhism on this one, and look to see if there is some middle way, surely point one is just not right, as one human being to another, and neither does 2 make sense in terms of world resources, and using goods in a sustainable way. But we do not have to abandon free enterprise, and initiative all together, as this at times has created innovative goods and advancements, that have made our world a much better place. I m sure Daver and BB will find this post unsubstantiated by economic fact and figures ( it is), but to me sometimes seeing the world just as a person unconstrained by the social edifices we have constructed, just makes you go hmmmm WTF are we doing?????

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 1 (view)

School hours and hols... Posted: 4/28/2013 9:27:45 AM
Michael Goves suggestion regarding shorter school holidays in the Summer (4 weeks), and a longer school day (8.30 - 4.30), in the hope it will raise standards, and help out parents who work... Good or Bad idea???

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 61 (view)

PERSONAL HYGIENE!! Posted: 4/28/2013 9:24:21 AM
Its definitely important to me, and I have met men who I haven t even fancied kissing, because their teeth just aren t clean enough. Men should look clean, smell nice, and have clean clothes, and their fingernails should be short and clean as well, that would put me off a bloke if they weren t! I m a stickler for kitchen hygiene too, and hand washing etc, and probably would find someway of bringing up cleanliness etc into the conversation with a prospective man. Clean loos are good too, men get brownie points if I go to their house and they have a well cared for loo, and they know to put the loo seat down before they flush as well!!! That does sound a bit offputting with the continental markets, mind you having worked in Cafes a couple of times, thats enough to put you off eating out, things that people can do behind the scenes!!!! I never understand why, people handle money, and then go back to serving food either. It would be good if people in our food shops wore gloves more often, and if I ever think that flies have access to food, then thats another no go for me as well. I m quite fussy about where I eat food too!!

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 32 (view)

true love/relationships Posted: 4/23/2013 12:37:13 PM
I valued reading what Flea said too Rose, it helps to hear how other people deal with similar feelings.. Rose at times in the past I wondered if I should have been on here, but I do think being on here, or being out there in the real world dating, is part of what helps you to move on. I know some people say you need to deal with issues etc from ex s before trying to find someone new, and I do think there is a time, when its too raw, and too sad, for it to be good for dating to be on the agenda. However, there is a time, when you re in a place, when some of that hurt and disappointment, or lack of confidence, or whatever feelings you have about the end of a relationship, can I feel, be helped very positively by some new people coming into your life, and showing that other people can offer new relationship dynamics for you to enjoy, and move forward with. The risk side is disappointment from one failure, can be compounded by other ones that dont work out, although I ve found in my experience, that its going to take an awful lot for anything to be as upsetting as the end of my marriage, and subsequent relationships that have not worked, have been disappointing, but makes you realise what can and cant work for you, and gives you a better idea of what you may want and need. Its not for me to say Rose how you deal with it, and my responses may be different to yours, but I m almost six years down the road as you are, and I can see a definite shift in how I see myself, and my relationship with my ex. I think part of that change has been down to meeting and talking to other men, and seeing not only how they see relationships, but also me. So for me I think being on here over the last couple of years has been, overall, a help in the 'healing' process.

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 21 (view)

Zipper Or Button ? Posted: 4/22/2013 5:10:16 PM
I think in terms of Rainbow, the zipper was very important, at those moments when you wanted to shut the great round headed one, with the annoying laugh up, fiddling with several buttons would not have had the same impact as pulling the zip across quickly in one neat movement. So which you prefer is obviously all in the context!!!! Would it be possible to make jeans with both, so for everyday wear you zip, and for those special intimate moments you button???? Probably they re already on the market, might make the jeans a bit bulgy too, although could be a bonus in that area

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 22 (view)

true love/relationships Posted: 4/22/2013 5:02:33 PM
I think sparkly is right you do make comparisons until you are over your ex... Rose I have made comparisons, initially they were in terms of wishing I could find someone like my ex, now I have learnt to see him differently, and realised that I could find a man with lots of his good qualities, but also some that he didn t have, and which is probably why our relationship failed. I do struggle with men though, who, despite my ex not being right for me, do not even measure up to him even now... If that makes sense, he did set the benchmark quite high for other acts to follow. I was in love with him when we split up, was with him for 20 odd years, had five children with him, and shared the happiest and saddest moments of my life with him, and admired lots of things about him. No one can measure up to a lot of those things, but I know they were part of my past, but are also why now, despite not being in love with him anymore, he will always be very special to me, and I can only say that for me he will always be 'family', he tags along in my mind as part of the package with my kids in my affection, they care about him and love him immensely, and as he s massively significant to them, he will always have significance to me. I can go weeks without seeing him, we don t share much about our lives, but deep down, those ties wont totally be severed. However, despite all that, I think having a positive view of your ex, does not mean you re not ready to move forward, as having had a few relationships, I have realised things I didn t have with him, and which really matter to me, and its exciting thinking how much I can enjoy, and learn and indeed grow from meeting new men, and hopefully one significant other at some point too.... To go back to the OP, yes I do think it can happen on here, know several people who have found relationships on the site (although through the forums), although I think its a bit like searching for the proverbial needle in haystack at times, and reading a lot of messages from frogs, until your Prince could arrive!!!!

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 3 (view)

Zipper Or Button ? Posted: 4/21/2013 11:20:54 AM
Agree with Alice, some women find them sexy, although take your point about speedy access at times, but some other things are best done in a lingering way, with maybe a bit of seductive eye contact... Also you cannot catch anything in button fly, zippers were not always the best thing when your Dad knocked but came straight in when you had a boyfriend with you !!!!!!

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 15 (view)

Almost Christmas - when do you start cookng your sprouts/ Posted: 4/21/2013 10:52:02 AM
I bet Rhett and Scarlett ate them on a date????!!

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 8 (view)

Computer/Bikes for africa ? Posted: 4/21/2013 10:43:26 AM
Maxwell, the buck may originally stop, or even start with the powers that be, but always behind that are the innocent human people who are affected. Aid like this, should not be needed, but it is, and the corruption is not the fault of those most affected. If we wait for power and corruption not to happen, these people will have missed out on more of lives opportunities, or worse not even have a life to be concerned about it... Edit: Absolutely its about empowering, and education without a doubt is, and will enable these kids to hopefully have the tools to change their corrupt Governments. I do think too that charitable agencies, take on board your arguments, and what to encourage these people to be independent, hence the phrase, give a man a fish and you ll feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and you ll feed him for a lifetime.. My contention is that lives are being lived now, and for regimes to change, and power to be overthrown it can take time, I think change and help needs to happen now. My understanding of this scheme was that it was old and recycled computers, and ones that may not be wanted or needed here. I think too its unlikely the scheme will be providing plush computer suites, but will be giving access on maybe a handful of second hand ones, which may well be more appreciated than they are in by some kids in some schools in the UK, where they are inclined to not use the computers very efficiently...

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 3 (view)

Almost Christmas - when do you start cookng your sprouts/ Posted: 4/20/2013 2:57:31 PM
Sprouts are nice, although they do need to be cooked really well for me. I cook them with swede and carrots and mash them all up, with butter and black pepper, and I really like that. I m no chef though, so probably doing lots of things wrong, but to me it tastes lovely... I d eat them pretty much all year round, probably not over the summer months when we have one, as its more salads then..

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 27 (view)

Where's the forum? Posted: 4/18/2013 11:52:46 AM
Found it - but such ' a funny thing happened on the way..' here!!

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 58 (view)

A horrible kisser Posted: 4/17/2013 3:52:15 AM
Sometimes I have thought it would be a good idea to guide some men towards certain film scenes, and then suggest they look at how the actors kiss, and compare their technique, because whilst I know lots of things on our screens are far from true life, I m not sure you can real fake a kiss?? The pace of it, the way people use their lips, the way it can start off very slow and subtle, and become more passionate as it progresses.... It should in my opinion, not been a fast paced lunge, with a tongue shoved down your throat at the first connection you make, and really feeling someones lips with yours is important too, and thats where being a bit sensitive and taking time ( even if its hard because you re nervous) makes a difference as well... I really do think some people need to think about the sensuality behind a kiss, as well as the romance, and the whhhhommmpppff of the sex bit too, its an expression of all those things, and thats why it shouldn t be rushed... well IMO anyhow...

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 16 (view)

Lying about your age. Posted: 4/14/2013 12:02:04 PM
It certainly makes you inconsistent Valentino, although perhaps you didn t realise how like judge, jury and excecutioner women can be at times. I dont know you, and you ve done me no wrong, so I ll assume your lie, was perhaps a bit of exaggeration on your part, silly though, cos women are very good at spotting where things don t add up, ( we are part blood hound too didn t you know) and unfortunately you stumbled on topics that are just not popular on this forum, and to be fair, we get them a lot, and often from people who pop up on here for that, and then disappear just as quickly.. Hopefully you ll have some joy on this site, and remember there are many shades of grey in women as well as a mans bedroom activities... (not read it, but isn t that the gist???)

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 8 (view)

Being Proud Posted: 4/14/2013 10:26:59 AM
I try to feel proud of things that I have done, because if I m truly honest its much easier for me to see things that I dont feel proud of in my life, so my default position is much more likely to be I should have done it this way instead, or dont that or whatever, rather than I have. That all said, and because I know that in part confidence and being proud of yourself are linked, and the former really is an enabler in helping you to do things, I do have stuff that I think yeah you did well girl, and then try to ignore the voice that is just about to demean it a bit. Humility is the counterbalance to pride though, as is asking yourself how much effort something cost you, as really if its a talent or something that you ve done with no real sweat, or motivation, or because you love it then is pride the appropriate thing to feel? So I suppose its good to feel pride, when you ve done something you fear, or when you ve put yourself in danger to help someone, or you ve worked really hard and overcome self doubt in yourself.. I think kids need to hear that parents are proud of them too, but again that links to the self confidence thing, as well as feeling you securely belong, but I can remember a certain age when having your parents be proud of you too much, was more of a problem than a good thing, I mean its just not cool when you re a teenager!!!!!

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 38 (view)

If you could choose what type of society to live in..... Posted: 4/14/2013 4:18:40 AM
I ve seen the Cravendale ad Mely, the cats are waiting they re just waiting........

Pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 121 (view)

All I want is good conversation... Posted: 4/14/2013 3:24:03 AM
Its ok Rose, I have a few ideas for threads, if we get stuck, I thought we could do profile reviews, or why people dont reply to my messages.... Innovative or what, don t know how I thought them up!!!!!!! Someone commented on the proper comments thread for site changes etc (I should really remembers its name), that he d put the thread link, at the top of his profile, so if we re not getting new blood to the Forums that could be an idea, failing that, its a quest for some vampires..... I vote Aiden Turner

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 114 (view)

All I want is good conversation... Posted: 4/13/2013 12:56:37 PM
Does that mean if you get a spinster degree, then you then go onto to do a Mistresses degree next.... One sounds so fuddy duddy, the othe too racey, now I wonder why is male terminology so much better??? ...

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 108 (view)

All I want is good conversation... Posted: 4/13/2013 11:56:01 AM
what about if any of the girls have socialist beliefs, what number would that be 4?? Did you see what I did there BB!! You do like Maggie as well dont you .....

Pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 100 (view)

All I want is good conversation... Posted: 4/13/2013 6:43:30 AM
It ll just be the select few TT, the ones who ve navigated the cyber highway, and managed to find there way back to the Shrangri la of the forums, having been left lost and floundering on just the date site, no light relief, from the 'hi huns', and the no replies, and the strange obscure picture choices.... I reckon we ll all be back here by the end of the day... you can get in here via the events pages, cos you get on an events threads, which brings you onto the Forums as well. But TT and BB, you are obviously special men, in amongst all these women who have got back on here so easily. Don t let that comment go to your heads though, you are just men after all, so don t get too excited

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 5 (view)

please review my profile! where am i going wrong :) Posted: 4/13/2013 5:17:10 AM
Thats made me smile BB, I wish I could write funny stuff, I can manage funny one liners and thats it... Now you ll say you were being really serious!!!! Make the most of the profile reviews, if the site stays this quiet it could be the last one we have, noone will ever find us... BB, my profile would be ripped apart I m sure, but its honest, and is there to attract the right man, not just any man, although I don think that many men get past the first few lines... You wouldn t seriously post yours would you ?? Your profile that is..

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 92 (view)

All I want is good conversation... Posted: 4/13/2013 4:42:34 AM
At least talking to yourself Polly you can always be right!!! Very odd decision on there part though, lots of people dip into the Forums, even if they don t contribute, and I think it sets POF apart from other free sites... Powers that be and all that, pffft what do they know??

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 18 (view)

Forum Link Posted: 4/13/2013 4:11:26 AM
well the uk forum has had four comments made since about 7.00 this morning, and it doesn t seem like people are viewing threads, although I ve only just looked at those numbers. I m just thinking everyone has got more exciting things on this Saturday than to be watching the forums!!!! Well I m hoping thats the case..

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 86 (view)

All I want is good conversation... Posted: 4/13/2013 3:28:09 AM
I m quite concerned if conversations will not be so many on here, now the link to the forums has disappeared! You can obviously get round it, but new people won t know about it, and for some reason it seems very quiet on here this morning, unless everyone has some very exciting Saturday stuff going on... I feel a bit like that Giraffe in that ad years ago, who asked 'where is everybody?' Still has someone said on the site complaints thread thing, it might limit people seeking random profile reviews, or the why is no one replying ones too, so maybe a silver lining, and I got to feel tall too for once!!!!!!!! Edit: Apparently they have done it once before, if you look on the thread where they complain or comment on stuff on here, some guy said it had. A friend on here too said its happened before too, although she said it did effect the forums, and they went really quiet...

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 14 (view)

Forum Link Posted: 4/13/2013 1:25:36 AM
Obviously we can still use it,but, if there is no link,then surely no one new to the site will see it or know about it?? Its not mentioned on the help or FAQ pages either...

Pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 7 (view)

pics of men in women's profiles, pets Posted: 4/12/2013 6:10:52 PM
I dont particularly like children on peoples pics, but the one that I always think is a really weird choice, is men holding obviously newborn babies, which I m presuming are their own cos of the age they are, and just the way its shot, so they post a pic of an obviously very significant time in their lives, which they presumably shared with the Mother of that child, and it was a truly special moment between the two of them. Odd choice in my opinion... I also think posting pics of a group and you then have to figure out which one you should be looking at is strange too, invariable its not the better looking ones!!! Why would you set yourself up for that comparison, thats another pic choice I dont get...

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 3 (view)

POF disco every monday night Posted: 4/12/2013 11:53:55 AM
reckon its Swansea, according to google, shame a disco near Porstmouth would have been good....

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 19 (view)

In need of a constructive profile review please Posted: 4/12/2013 8:46:28 AM
The other thing for me, is that I dont think you should think of yourself in terms of someone ' taking a chance' on you, (Yeah I know Abba thought it was a good idea, but hey they were a world famous pop group!!!) I think it sounds either that you are a bit desperate, or you think the person you are writing to is!!! Or that you feel that there is not much that is outstanding about you, and you will be outstanding just as you are to the right person. Some people may take chances on here, but most make choices (the profiles are designed for it to be like that), and it just goes back to that being valued and appreciated for who you are. So for me, if you use that line on messaging that would be something that would put me off, as guys have said that to me at times, ( never sure if its a reference to me or them), I can see its part of your thinking as you expressed it in your opening post, and I thought I d give you my take on it...

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 11 (view)

In need of a constructive profile review please Posted: 4/12/2013 8:08:31 AM
I m tending to agree with the girls, there is a proper forum for this, and it should really be on there. Possibly though take a bit of time reading other profiles, men and women and ask yourself what works for you, and how you can transfer that onto your own. I dont think you can look men up on a search (well only gays ones!) , but you can look at men profiles that come up on the forum pages, from all over the world, so that could give you some ideas about tweaks you could make.. Edit: To be honest, I dont think it matters in this instance whether men or women give advice, as its bringing out the best in you, and who you are, not whether you can write what women may like, thats pointless if thats not what you re like. My profile is about me trying to find a man who gets me, and who ll I ll click with and understand too, and have things in common with. If I wanted to write a profile that men would like it would be a whole lot different, tailor your profile to what would be right for you...

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 2 (view)

Is our future mapped out or do we have freewill? Posted: 4/12/2013 3:23:53 AM
I think our existence is a bit like that road we sometimes use to describe this journey called life, and on said road, there are thing on the wayside or that we meet, and thats maybe the mapped out bit, how we respond to those things and the choices we make about directions, and whether we go the scenic route, or the M27, or even off piste is the free will bit... Thats one way you could see it, but I also think that we often say things happen for a reason, cos it actually the stuff that we can t see why it happened, the negatives often, things that cause us heartache or sadness, but which we know we have to move on from, so thinking there is some bigger plan mapped out,maybe helps us to be more positive about moving forwards from the negatives. It also can help us to feel more confident about the good things too, if we think this was meant to happen, and its right. Is it true, who knows??? I just feel that humans have evolved different ways of making the unpredictability of life, and the dangers that we have had to face, to have more reason behind them, and to therefore feel that there is more control to our existence. We just want to feel more secure I suppose, because ultimately life is a strange one when you think the only certainty you have in it is one day you will die, and probably all our making sense of it is, is always implicitly or explicity bound up in that knowledge.

pandora0237

Joined: 11/21/2010

Msg: 30 (view)

You couldn't make it up Posted: 4/12/2013 3:10:27 AM
Alice what have you been doing that a whole operation has been named after you, still at £144,000, you are obviously worth it!!! Were you the one member of the public???? I d dined out on the imagined notoriety!!!!! You could be as scandalous as you like....

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