Blue Cafe~+~ Long Beach ~+~ March 10 2007 chat & forums.

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Thread: Blue Cafe~+~ Long Beach ~+~ March 10 2007

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 113 (view)

Blue Cafe~+~ Long Beach ~+~ March 10 2007 Posted: 3/11/2007 4:45:12 PM
Sorry i didn't get out there :( My ride decided not to attend at the last minute and I didnt want to be my own designated driver LOL. Hope everyone had a great time and I will try to make the next one! /hugs Maria

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 97 (view)

Blue Cafe~+~ Long Beach ~+~ March 10 2007 Posted: 3/10/2007 3:21:06 PM
ok.... looks like I might come out afterall . Maybe I will see ya'all there :) Would be nice to meet some friendly people and happy faces! Besides, live music calls to me! Maria

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 27 (view)

Financial Responsibility- love don't pay the rent Posted: 11/4/2006 12:44:55 PM
I feel sorry for anyone planning on dating Smjle. Brrrrrrrrrrrr. no warm fuzzy feelings there.

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 166 (view)

how do you get revenge on someone you loved Posted: 11/4/2006 7:26:48 AM
revenge = childish and a waste of time. It is never the appropriate response to anything. get it out of your system and move on. An idea: write it all down as if you were perhaps writing him a letter, let it all out... no holding back and then once you're exhausted from that excersize, burn it. Now focus on good things and don't allow it to creep back in. :) I wish you well.

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 42 (view)

Guys...How do we girls know if a guy is into us?!! Posted: 11/4/2006 7:21:06 AM
I think that it would be obvious if there is a definate interest. I think the problem is when we doubt their interest, we make up excuses as to why we aren't feeling their interest. We are interested in them but perhaps it is not really reciprocated. I say if it's not obvious then it's not there and rather than let you go they are playing some sort of game (I don't enjoy mind games, Im too open and honest for that) I would much rather be told there is no interest (amazingly enough we can live through that statement lol) than be reeled in on occasion when it suits him. Life is too short and there is someone out there that will be obviously interested in you!

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 127 (view)

Can a relationship survive politics? Posted: 11/3/2006 9:02:57 PM
I actually couldn't imagine politics being the downfall of a relationship unless it is a major portion of who you are as a person (and that would be bad in my opinion) politics is a personal thing and there is no reason why 2 people with opposing views can't be compatible... in fact it should be a good topic of conversation to keep you both on your toes LOL. If politics were that important then it would have been an issue from the get go and a relationship would have never blossomed so the point is kind of moot. Same thing with religion.... politics and religion are the most volatile of topics in human history.

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 45 (view)

Is marriage the leading cause of divorce? Posted: 11/3/2006 8:46:33 PM
Do we have to point out the obvious to make ourselves feel more intellectual? Just have fun with the subject matter. LOL soooooooooo serious we are.

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 53 (view)

The pain of your ex seeing someone else Posted: 11/3/2006 8:43:37 PM
Ignore the snide remarks. There is a definate greaving process that takes place and the reason I know is because I am going through the same thing. I have moved on and there is no yearning to go back (other than the longing for happiness that once was but it has nothing to do with being with that person again) It's called greaving and part of that is the frustration of the fact that the other person is no longer greaving (as far as you know) and with someone else. This too shall pass and a good rule to live by is 'Don't spend your time dwelling in the past, look forward to your future and the good things that it will bring'.. it is the next step to your greaving process to let it go. Not easy I know, but necessary. Life is too short. A big hug from me and it will pass as soon as you allow it to.

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 23 (view)

Financial Responsibility- love don't pay the rent Posted: 11/3/2006 8:31:17 PM
Love doesn't pay the rent, but it's still love. The amount of money someone has has no relation to how responsible they are with money. Someone could be very responsible with their finances and still not be ahead of the game. And there is nothing wrong with occasionally throwing caution to the wind (that's how adventures are made sometimes!) Money has never been a consideration on who I date but if a person shows responsibility in their finances, then chances are they are going to treat their relationships with the same responsible behavior. If someone spends without concern to their income, then they will probably not take other aspects of their life with any seriousness either. so..... what am I saying? LOL well I would be horrified to find out someone ran a credit check on me to see if I was worthy of their attention nor would I do that someone but I would pay close attention to how responsible they are to other aspects of their life as well as finances while we were dating because that is an indication of their of their character and how they approach life.

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 197 (view)

Does ignoring a guy really get his attention? Posted: 11/3/2006 7:30:38 PM
It's a mind game..... I would like to think that most people don't like to play mind games in relationships but I keep getting proven wrong. I don't like games, I like people to just be who they are and do what they want and say what they feel etc etc. What I found amazing is that a guy in his 40's just recently said to me.... "don't you enjoy the chase?" I would think that by the time you reach a certain age it would become evident that games are just a waste of time. Needless to say, we didn't go out again. I would rather have fun than play mind games.

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 51 (view)

To the women. Would you write to a guy here first.Or you believe the guy has to write first? Posted: 11/3/2006 7:22:39 PM
If I waited for the guys to make the first move I would probably be sitting on my butt at home most of the time. Some do, but there is nothing wrong with approaching them too. Works both ways. Some guys like it.... others will run for their lives!!!! HAHAHAHA I say, just be who you are, and if that means bold... then be bold and eventually the right guy will eat it up :) soooo I guess Im saying.... sure, why not?!

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 42 (view)

Is marriage the leading cause of divorce? Posted: 11/3/2006 7:18:21 PM
Good Post! So True! There is nothing worse than a binding contract that says you must be in a relationship till the day you die no matter what. Who came up with that idea? If you are a rebel in any sense of the word, then that piece of paper will drive you farther away from your partner instead of cementing the relationship. What's that saying about the butterfly......... Take it to heart. (yes, I've been married)

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 29 (view)

need some help with this one!! Posted: 11/3/2006 7:15:35 PM
In relationships you either trust your partner or you don't. If there is lying going on (no matter what the reason) then it's not meant to be. People who care about each other don't blatantly lie to each other about silly things like that. If there is nothing going on, then fess up about it from the start. If your partner can't handle it and lying about it is easier than telling the truth, then there is no trust in your partner's ability to handle it (meaning, he is not trusting you as well)..... not compatible on social situations is a deal breaker in my book... it's just going to make it's way into other social situations. This will fester and will eventually kill you both in the relationship so why move forward. Either trust him or get out. Distrust and Jealousy are horrible attributes to a relationship. That's my opinion.

musicalswede

Joined: 9/8/2006

Msg: 17 (view)

why do men in there mid 40's fall in love after only a few dates? Posted: 11/3/2006 6:57:09 PM
I'm thinking you are attracting or are attracted to a certain "type" of man and therefore can expect the same type of reaction from most of them. I might be taking a leap here, but perhaps you were finding that the rate of "men who fall in love too fast" was a large percentage for you even in your 30's and their 30's... Maybe you enjoy being in "control" over the relationship and therefore seek out the weaker men? It's much easier if they fall first then if it were the other way around. Just ideas to think about. I would like to know where the guys are that are in their mid 40's that dont run in the other direction when they feel something! lol. maybe we need to trade types you and me

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