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 Author Thread: I honestly believe supernatural forces are keeping me alone.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 12 (view)
 
I honestly believe supernatural forces are keeping me alone.
Posted: 11/23/2009 2:30:30 AM
Here's the deal. At 6'4" you're a rather tall guy. A lot of women find that attractive, not to mention you're 'something they can't have' since you're gay. I don't know how the gay mind works, but I've had gay friends and co-workers. There is a lot of drama involved with being gay. And there is a lot of promiscuity in the gay male community. Looks are VERY important for gay men. I've heard of older gay men committing suicide because they're not so considered so attractive anymore by other gay men. It seems like the young skinny guys (18-21 years of age) are what a lot of gay men want.

Being with a woman sexually won't 'cure' you of being gay, but if you're more of a 'pitcher' than a 'catcher' that could be a good temporary arrangement.

I used to participate in Yahoo Chat years ago and talked to gay men. A lot of them have wives. A lot of them don't get all that involved in the gay scene or community.

Good luck with your search!
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 14 (view)
 
The Big Deal About Being Single.
Posted: 11/23/2009 2:09:43 AM

Justinflh:
Just a note. This is not a self-petty thread. I'm just baffled as to why other people make my personal life their business?

Misery loves company.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 91 (view)
 
How to tell a woman to start paying for part of the date
Posted: 11/23/2009 2:05:43 AM
I don't think it's just Los Angeles women who feel like the guy should pay. That attitude is prevalent here in the South too. Then again, it seems like most trends start in Los Angeles and New York City and then spread out to the rest of the country.

Yeah, for those who pay for everything on dates, I hope they're getting good sex out of the deal.

I think one way you can get around this is to project the attitude that she's not the only woman in your life. When women figure out she's the only woman in your life, you're basically toast!
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 239 (view)
 
What lessons have you learned from online dating?
Posted: 11/23/2009 1:27:02 AM

tracyannk:
I've learned how shallow and mean men are. I haven't encountered this IRL as much as I have here.

As a male I can say the same thing for women. It seems much easier to hide behind the computer monitor and a screen name than it is to be a b*tch or a**hole in real life and risk getting your a** kicked.

I also learned that everyone seems to like long walks on the beach, even if they live no where near the water...

True. I used to live on the Texas Gulf Coast and the waters there are polluted. On the other hand, I've been to some nice beaches in Brazil with clear turquoise water. My Brazilian ex-girlfriend and I even made out on such a beach!

One thing I've learned from online dating is that it's a much less effective way of meeting women than going out and running into women in my everyday life. It is definitely much less effective than looking for a potential 'mail-order bride' and going abroad to meet some of them.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 508 (view)
 
New Fish, Please Read
Posted: 11/23/2009 1:09:26 AM
If you're a guy, say everything a woman wants to hear.

If you say something a woman doesn't want to hear, she'll quickly disappear!

Examples of saying things a woman doesn't want to hear:

* I'm (currently) unemployed.
* I have health issues.
* I will NOT be financially responsible for another man's kids.

 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 66 (view)
 
A question about dominant men. Can they also be gentlemen?
Posted: 11/23/2009 1:01:29 AM
Sure. Then again, some of my ex-girlfriends freaked out when part of my bedroom repetoire involved spanking.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 65 (view)
 
Does online dating make your life easier?
Posted: 11/23/2009 12:48:54 AM

yfs2108:
Has anyone ever 'dated' someone living in a different country to them? If so how does this work? I think one of the beauties of online dating is that you could potentially meet people from a country that youve never even been too! Any tips on these long distance relationships - do they even work?

Yes, actually I have. I'm actually quite rare for an Anglophone in that I speak various languages in varying degrees. I had a girlfriend in Brazil who I went to see 8 years ago. That relationship lasted for 3 years and we'd call each other about every Sunday as well as e-mail. We got along just as well in person as we did away from each other. She was a high school Portuguese teacher and couldn't get the same job outside of a Lusophone country unless she lived somewhere like New York City, so in the end she didn't want to move. Me, I had kidney problems and didn't want to depend on my employer at the time for continued employment after moving to another country, even when I was able to work from home half the time. I had similar problems with 'international' jobs. I couldn't find jobs like that in the sticks. I had to move to big cities to find jobs like that. Even though my salary was pretty good, it was a pain having to move and start all over again.

Yes, LDRs do work if both people are willing to put forth the effort to make it work. Eventually you have to decide whether you're willing to relocate to be with that person.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 108 (view)
 
Is the number of acceptable places to approach women offline shrinking?
Posted: 11/23/2009 12:25:18 AM

womaninprogress: Yes, but only for men who can't read social cues and body language or who have rusty or non existent social skills.

You can approach most women anywhere if you know what you're doing. If you don't - they'll sense it, and you'll put them off.

Well, I'd sure hate to make online dating my only option. In my area most of the women on this site are single or divorced with kids. I don't have kids myself and don't really want a 'package deal'. So recently I've been getting offline and going out on Friday night or Saturday again. Saturday evening I was sitting and perusing books near the travel section. Two women were looking for a travel book on Brazil. I asked them if they had ever been to Brazil. It turns out one of them was from Manaus, which is a northern Brazilian city and a gateway to the Amazon rain forest. The conversation started out in English and then I started speaking Portuguese and we continued the conversation in that language. I told her I'd been to northeastern Brazil where I used to have a girlfriend. She kept asking me if I wanted to marry a Brazilian woman. I told her it really depends on the woman. We then agreed that a lot of women there are looking for guys with money and then after 5 years (or however long it takes to get a green card here) she splits. She was 36, a nursing student, and married.

Yeah, like womaninprogress said, it's really about being able to approach anybody anywhere and finding a reason to strike up a conversation. Earlier this year I was at Wal-Mart and struck up a conversation with a young woman looking at cards for Father's Day. It turns out she was a new college cheerleader.


Undiscoveredgent: I suspect that this is what is pushing online dating. Women determine the terms of men-women public interaction, and for some reason they are increasingly expanding the list of places where approaching them is a no-no. It has gotten to the point in the city where I am that outside of class, work, online and through friends there is very little chance of meeting women these days.

I think what you're talking about, OP, is the 'b*tch shield' women put up in places like nightclubs and bars where they expect men to approach them. If you were a hot-looking woman and over 20 guys approached you, wouldn't you do the same? Well, in situations like class, work, and through friends, women are usually have their 'b*tch shields' lowered in those places.


myrgth: I disagree. What is pushing on line dating is that as we get older our social circles shrink as does our time to get out there. Many work odd hours and some are just socially inept.

I agree. In college I met a lot of women on campus and dated some of them. Once I left college my social circle shrank considerably.

Every time you leave your house there is an opportunity to interact and socialize with the opposite sex. If you chose not to then that's your choice.

That is so true! Always put your best foot forward because you never know when you're going to run into a new person you find attractive.

I talk to people every time I'm out. Male, female, children. I get approached and asked out way more in real life than I do on line.

Yeah, it's about developing and using social skills.

Don't let others dictate where and when you should or shouldn't approach women. Approach them everywhere you encounter them. The ones that find it unacceptable just aren't interested in you. Don't take it personally, just continue on until you find someone that is. You don't have to be on the prowl to meet women. Just be friendly to all the people you encounter day to day. The more you do this the more attractive you become.

Well, even baseball players don't have a consistent batting average of over 50%. Sometimes you will strike out. Even Ross Jeffries (a seduction guru) has admitted even he strikes out once in a while. You have to go out with a good frame of mind because women do pick up on that. Being 'on the prowl' to meet women is a HORRIBLE idea. I agree with the Zen axiom: "When you seek it, you cannot find it." For me the best way is to use a Zen approach and not be so attached to the outcome. It's much better to apply that to social interactions than to samurai sword-fighting in feudal Japan where it was often a matter of life or death. You want to know a great to meet women? Go on Meetup (it's a dotcom), find activities you'd enjoy in your local area, and go to the meetings. Where I live Meetup has less than 10 interest groups and most of them I'm not interested in at all, but if you live in a more populated area you will have a lot more options. From what I heard from a PUA (pickup artist) guru, at such places women outnumber men and he even gave a tip that a guy should look his best (in other words, not dress like a slob) and put his best foot forward in those kinds of situations.

If you have the money, going on a Single Gentlemen's romance tour to a foreign city would be a good idea too. Don't go with the expectation of finding a girlfriend or wife. Don't be attached to the outcome! Still, you will meet a lot of women (interpreters are available), get their contact info, and date them. Then when you get back you can write to them. From my experience, a lot of women I've met in Latin America were looking for green cards, so you have to be careful. Then again, like the Brazilian woman was telling me at the bookstore a few days ago, you have to take risks when you're going for what you want. That applies to women just as it does to career decisions.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 57 (view)
 
Is it worthwhile to date here?
Posted: 11/22/2009 11:43:00 PM
Well, for me online dating is only one option. However, in my local area most of the women on POF are single or divorced mothers who don't have a lot of time to go out casually. I don't have children myself, nor do I really want a 'package deal', so now I make an effort to go out on a Friday night or Saturday and meet new people.

In the past when I didn't have success in meeting people online or offline, I'd write to women in Latin America (I love women with natural tans!) and I've visited some of them, including one in Brazil, which was the only country in Latin America I had to get a tourist visa for. On one connecting flight to Miami, I met a Mexican and he too had to get a tourist visa just to go to Brazil. His itinerary sounded very exciting and including skiing in Chile. It was in June and it was winter in Chile.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Man asks woman to go to his home after dinner on first date
Posted: 11/22/2009 11:21:36 PM
I don't know. I'm not him. If he asked to see you again within a reasonable amount of time (and 'next weekend' is reasonable), then he enjoys your company and wants to spend more time with you.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 696 (view)
 
Very long hair on a woman is very femine and sexy, but few women have long hair
Posted: 11/22/2009 11:05:14 PM
You will usually find all the women with really long hair in more conservative Christian denominations.

Happy fishing!
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 213 (view)
 
Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish
Posted: 11/22/2009 10:56:30 PM

kissmekindsir: What am I saying? There are those, espeacially males now that would NEVER marry upon American soil as they fear Divorce court and Child support for a good reasons! So one may be more ethical Co-habiting that walking to the altar!

This is SO true! Then again, cohabitation may not be such a great option either, especially if the woman has kids. In some states women have rights to a man's property if she's lived there long enough. And even if the guy can be proven not to be the biological father of her kids, she can still get child support from him, especially if the kids look to him as a 'father figure'.

The North American legal system (in both Canada and the USA) favor women in most cases. In many cases quite unfairly. As someone else put it. The wife can f*** Pedro the pool boy and still get a windfall from divorcing her husband.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 210 (view)
 
Boyfriend whoring on Plenty of Fish
Posted: 11/22/2009 10:30:09 AM
So, belle-6, why is he your boyfriend instead of a nice guy?

It never ceases to amaze me. Women go out with jerks and then use their male friends (without benefits) for free psychiatry. Chances are one of your male friends would make a better partner since he's so willing to put up with your BS. Heck, he may even pay your way on a date!
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 29 (view)
 
Text talk in the over 30s
Posted: 11/22/2009 10:13:21 AM
StaffsMarie, I think getting a message like "luv ure profile, gr8t 2 meet up?" would be a great excuse to use the block feature.

As for texting itself, it's fine as long as it's not the primary mode of communication.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 31 (view)
 
DNA Based Dating
Posted: 11/22/2009 10:09:10 AM
I think Adolf Hitler would've loved this idea. The Master Race! Tall men and blonde women for all! Athletic too!
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 191 (view)
 
bend over.
Posted: 11/22/2009 9:56:29 AM
As for me, I love anal sex. Whenever I get to do that to a woman, it's great. No, I don't think about doing it to a guy or dominating a woman. In fact, if it's painful for her or she's not that into it, then I have no problem stopping and doing something else.

Men have a prostate. I've heard of gay guys being able to have orgasms from just being the "catcher" during anal sex with no penile stimulation at all. That would be interesting to experience, but not from another guy. I don't find men attractive and too many gay men are way too promiscuous, so many of them have STDs.

If a man wants to reverse the roles and take it up the butt from his woman, I don't see a problem with that as long as he's a man in other areas of life. And talking about taking it up the butt probably isn't the best thing to talk about while dining with other people.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 99 (view)
 
I am breaking up with BF Today! Had ENOUGH
Posted: 11/22/2009 9:39:06 AM
It doesn't sound like he enjoys being with you. If he did, he'd be showing you that he did.

On the other hand, how would you feel with a guy who called you all the time? Especially if you weren't particularly attracted to him. Or if he called you so much that you eventually got bored and started to lose your attraction for him.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Communicating every day
Posted: 11/22/2009 9:30:46 AM

Landra2: There's a difference between a new relationship and dating
a new relationship, where we had been dating for some time and had become committed- every day, just to say hello. But NO 3-4-5-10 hour phone conversations like I've seen people here wax poetic about. And no texting
dating- a couple of times a week, maybe 3 times at most

Yeah, 3-hour phone conversations are a bit much.
I'm not a text-a-holic either. It's a good quick way to tell somebody something, but not as the primary means of communication.
Talking everyday on the phone gets boring quick.
I used to work in call centers, so the last thing I want to do is spend a lot of time on the phone.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 76 (view)
 
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/21/2009 7:45:13 PM
I was at a bookstore earlier this evening. Two women were looking for travel books on Brazil. I asked one of them if she had even been to Brazil. It turns out she was from Manaus, in the Amazonian region in the North. I told her I'd been to Northeast Brazil. After that we spoke in Portuguese and I told her about my Brazilian ex-girlfriend. She asked me if I wanted to marry a Brazilian woman. I told her that it depends of the woman. She said a lot of Brazilian women want to marry a North American (could easily apply to Australians and Western Europeans as well) and leave Brazil. She said a lot of them want money and I said a lot of them want citizenship. She said a lot of women split after getting their green card. Still, she said you have to take risks when you're going for something you want, and I totally agree with that. She was 36, married, and was going to school for nursing. Still, it was a good chat. I'm sure it's not every day she meets someone out here in East Texas who speaks Portuguese.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 179 (view)
 
Why Do Men Think All Women Like Their 12 Inchers?????
Posted: 11/17/2009 6:09:16 PM
Here's something humorous for ya...

Q: Who's the most popular guy at a nudist camp?
A: The one who can fit 12 donuts on his erect schlong.

Q: Who's the most popular gal at a nudist camp?
A: The one who can go all the way down to the last donut.

 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 303 (view)
 
The Game and its effectiveness
Posted: 11/17/2009 7:51:03 AM

WomanInProgress: -Placing so much importance on being a date/having a date. When you do this, you think others have something you don't. You unfairly compare yourself to others. You have entitlement issues and feel you are owed someone. You become bitter that it's not happening when you want it to. You think there's a set of steps that should be followed to get what you want and assume you weren't briefed. You start seeing forever in everyone who pays attention to you, and get disappointed when the majority of them don't pan out. You think life without a mate is somehow less of a life, and spend all your time without a date waiting for when it happens so you can finally start living...

This is so true. I used to feel like this all the time when I wasn't in a relationship. People who look to other people to make them happy are miserable, and I was one of them. Basically, if you're an unhappy person to begin with, no one else can make you happy. In fact, if a miserable person gets a partner, they will eventually lose him or her because the other will get tired of being with a downer.

In the Wicca religion there is something called the Charge of the Goddess (and many versions of it). Here's part of it....

"... know that the seeking and yearning will avail you not, unless you know the Mystery: for if that which you seek, you find not within yourself, you will never find it without."
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 26 (view)
 
North American dating a japanese woman. What do I need to know??
Posted: 11/16/2009 7:59:06 PM
Oh yeah. "I want half, Eddie! Half!"

Yeah, most likely it's much better for a man to live abroad in a country where he wants to find a girlfriend or wife than it is to bring one here.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 109 (view)
 
Russian women with US citizenship
Posted: 11/16/2009 7:52:29 PM

Trueblooo: The irony of women on a frickin' DATING site complaining about "mail order brides."
It's too much, really.

Well, the women here are used to being the ones choosing (while the men chase and jump through all kinds of hoops, etc.). They'd rather see a man's money wind up in his American ex-wife's bank account than see him being happy.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 83 (view)
 
Prove Me Wrong, PLEASE
Posted: 11/16/2009 6:15:39 PM

"Woman give sex for love, men give love for sex."

I thought it was: "Women give sex for money; men give money for sex."
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 107 (view)
 
Russian women with US citizenship
Posted: 11/16/2009 5:43:35 PM

bradentonpooh:Russian educational system is very strong. That is why I didn't have any problem to get my Doctorate at 28. It is more your start versus your IQ.

Traditional values that were developed in you since childhood are not going to vanish only because you get naturalized. E.g. if a woman was raised on healthy home cooked meals she will continue to do so in her adult life (despite of a blue passport) and not switch to a junk food.

Relationship however are more build on your personality, system of values, chemistry versus IQ and education.

I can say here are quite a few men in this country who crave a woman with a traditional up-bringing who has her immigration papers, SSN, education, and pays her bills.

I would agree that the Russian educational system is very strong. Healthy eating is also a good thing. These are the qualities I'd love to see my future children have, to be well-educated and healthy. I feel like I'd have a much better chance of that happening with a Russian wife than with an American one. I studied Russian for 2 years in college. From time to time I watch Russian movies and think they're really good, in spite of the lack of violence and explosions in most of them. This week I'm re-watching "Ирония патом" (called "Enjoy Your Bath" in English).

On the other hand, countries which used to be under Russian rule during the Soviet era did not care for it and most of their citizens didn't care to learn Russian.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 845 (view)
 
Do women cook anymore??
Posted: 11/16/2009 4:16:12 PM
It's a shame when a woman doesn't know how to cook. It's not rocket science. I've known how to cook for a long time. Only recently have I begun to expand my repetoire and learn how to cook different things. In my opinion the best way to cook is to cook big portions and freeze what you don't eat for later. Then all you have to do is thaw it out (to me the fastest way to do that is to let it sit in its plastic container in hot water for an hour), nuke it, and eat it. Job done.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 277 (view)
 
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 11/16/2009 4:02:15 PM
Tom Leykis advises men to dump a woman if she hasn't had sex with him after the third date.
tinyurl[dot]com[slash]yd9avwc

I think some men and women want to know if the other person is into them romantically and sexually. In college I dated a lot and could feel the sexual tension in the air because of a girl waiting for me to make the first move. Sometimes I did and sometimes I didn't. Nevertheless, if you really dig someone, then make passes at them and see how they respond, and their response will tell you what you need to know.

Seriously, I think women ought to take more of an initiative in making the first passes because a lot of guys simply won't do it. Then again, women look at such men as wusses and wouldn't want to date them anyway.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 298 (view)
 
The Game and its effectiveness
Posted: 11/16/2009 3:48:13 PM
I believe that men resort to the "game" (learning seduction techniques, etc.) because in this country dating heavily favors women. The women sit back and let guys approach them and not the other way around in most cases. Many attractive (and even semi-attractive) women are used to men approaching them all the time, and so they (women) test them (men) and basically bust their (men's) chops to see if he "qualifies" to be a part of her life. These women are like housewives at home all day turning down offer after offer from different telemarketers and such. The telemarketers who have a thick skin and know how to make a sale under pressure do the best.

Attractive (and even not so attractive) women are used to being approached by men all the time. That's why many of them put up their "b^tch shield" when guys approach them. Guys eventually get tired of it and some of them turn to the seduction community so they can learn different techniques and ways of approaching women.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 163 (view)
 
Why Do Men Think All Women Like Their 12 Inchers?????
Posted: 11/16/2009 3:35:59 PM
@ Margo64

But you never truly know if it's a Peter North model until you actually pull the trigger!
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 96 (view)
 
My first Russian mail order bride!
Posted: 11/16/2009 3:28:23 PM
Well, I've gotten quite a few fake Russian "girls" write me and their English looked like it went through an online translation site.

This is what I get when I type "I am 37 years old" in Yahoo Babelfish: "Я 37 лет старых."
That is a literal translation; still, it is incorrect Russian. In proper Russian you'd say "У меня 37 лет" ("To me (there is) 37 years"). In Russian "years old" is "года" from 0-4 and "лет" from 5-9. It works exactly the same way from 10 on up: 10-14 is "года" and 15-19 is "лет".
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 94 (view)
 
My first Russian mail order bride!
Posted: 11/15/2009 8:31:02 PM

tuffluv1984: Why are there no mail order grooms?

Women aren't this F'in STUPID! Another fool parts with his money.

Dying of laughter here...

I would disagree with the "women aren't this F'in STUPID" comment. Many American women have been scammed by foreign guys, most of them from Nigeria, and I'm not talking about the 419 scam where they claim you'll get millions if you only give them your banking info. These guys give these women false hope and milk them of their money. It's been a topic on daytime talk shows, not that I watch them that much except when I did dialysis for 4 years, though I did catch one Dr. Phil episode on this very topic.

Yeah, you do have to be careful. The best experience I had was with a Brazilian woman. We wrote and called each other for 3 years before I went down there. It would've been about a year sooner if I hadn't owed the IRS about $1,300 because of not enough money being withheld from my paycheck, but I'm no fool with money so I was able to pay that without having to borrow.

20 years ago I went to Mexico after having written a girl for less than a year. I ran out of money. My parents delayed sending me money on what our Mexican-American neighbor told them. If they had sent it right away, the girl's family (mother mostly; the dad was out of the picture) would've thought I was rich and would've had me marry her. When I got the money the girl and her friend meticulously took most of the money and left me only enough to get back on. I'm sure I wasn't the first guy they scammed like that. Overall, the Mexican people were very nice. It was just the people I stayed with when I was down there. Then when I got back to the States I talked to a Mexican friend's mom about it. She only speaks Spanish and told me not to stay with a girl's family should I go to Mexico again.

Looking back I'm glad that happened because I now know what to watch for. For example, if the girl's father is absent from her life, then most likely she's going to have daddy issues. Also, the correspondence should last at least a year before meeting. If she's impatient, it'll show and she'll probably stop writing. That's why it's a good idea to spread your net as far as possible. Give yourself the best chance to find the woman you're looking for. Another thing I learned was what she does for a living is VERY important in choosing a woman. The 2 girls in Mexico and Panama didn't even have a job. Neither had their dad in their lives. My Brazilian ex-girlfriend was a high school Portuguese teacher and it wasn't very likely she could get a job like that outside of Brazil. At first she thought that's what she'd do here. I told her she would probably have to train for another kind of job and ever since then she didn't want to leave Brazil. She didn't want to clean houses as many Brazilian women here do to make extra money. I knew one like that in Dallas. But you know, at least I was honest with her.

As for local women, I don't think so! The kind of local women I'd like are either too taken or too young (under 25). Most available local women have kids. I'm not interested in playing daddy or taking financial responsibility for some other guy's kids. And then there are the religious fanatics who only want a Christian guy, never mind that bigger churches have singles groups. Perhaps they're not finding the Christian guy who can fulfill her other requirements as well.... Plus, I don't think I'd have too much in common with local women. I'm not originally from rural East Texas and so I never became a redneck or country boy. One thing I've noticed about a lot of East Texas women is they have a cigarette in one hand and a baby in the other. Neither appeal to me. Dallas women aren't too friendly unless you're at least 5'10" and make at least $50,000 a year. However, I did meet some nice foreign women when I lived in Dallas. At times I wish I hadn't had the Brazilian girlfriend because there were some girls I would've gone out with otherwise. Then again, if I hadn't had the Brazilian girlfriend then I wouldn't have gone to Brazil, at least not on my own.

One thing that helps me is I'm good at picking up foreign languages. That's helped me professionally as well as with foreign women. I speak Spanish and Portuguese at an advanced level. I studied Russian for 2 years in college. To this day I keep up with my Russian and try to get better at it. The Cyrillic alphabet is simple compared to Russian grammar, I assure you!
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 23 (view)
 
North American dating a japanese woman. What do I need to know??
Posted: 11/15/2009 4:30:38 PM

driven2think: Thanks for all your responses! I have met a nice japanese lady & I'm just trying to be cautious about not being too forward or offending her in any way.

Understood. Go to Amazon and look up Culture Shock Japan. That'll give you a good list of books to choose from.

Here's a quote from the NoMarriage site.

One year with my Japanese girlfriend

So far...
-No fights.
-Great sex every night.
-She cooks a delicious meal every night (unless I take her out).
-No guilt trips for going out with the guys.
-Thin and absolutely beautiful.

Think I've finally found myself a keeper. One thing's for sure; I'll never go date an American girl again.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 21 (view)
 
North American dating a japanese woman. What do I need to know??
Posted: 11/15/2009 3:47:27 PM

tuffluv1984: I hope you find the nice foreign lady sucking up to you for a green card. Get a pre-nup. Just calling it as I see it.

Yeah, I've had experiences with some Latinas looking for a green card. In those cases I should've taken more time (at least a year) to get to know them before going to Latin America and meeting them. On the other hand, My Brazilian ex-girlfriend and I broke up because she didn't want to leave Brazil. Imagine that. Many Americans think all foreigners are knocking the doors down just to come here and become a citizen.

Yeah, at least one year of correspondence before meeting should be good enough to weed out most of the green card hunters.

And getting a pre-nup is a good idea anyway, especially in a country where laws favor women over men. tinyurl[dot]com[slash]yhlev2m
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 20 (view)
 
North American dating a japanese woman. What do I need to know??
Posted: 11/15/2009 3:37:26 PM

cooldude: I hope you find the nice foreign lady sucking up to you for a green card. Get a pre-nup. Just calling it as I see it.

^^^
We are not talking third world country here. More then likely they have enough of their own money.

This is true. Japan is one of the most expensive countries in the world to live in, so there'd be no problem for a Japanese girl to come here and be self-sufficient for a while.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 63 (view)
 
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/15/2009 3:31:30 PM

Climbing-well123: Then again its hard to find the right women. As too many have too high expectations and want u to be a slave. Or expect you to support 7 kids and be happy and supply everything.

This is SO true, especially here in the States. In their early adult years they went for the Jerk, had kids with him, and now they want a Nice Guy who makes good money to marry so he can support her and the kids she had with the Jerk.

Take a look at the NoMarriage site. The TenetsOfLeykis site has good advice for men too.
Both are dotcoms.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 59 (view)
 
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/15/2009 10:25:55 AM

tstevens7: Coming from a previous marriage, then a 2 yr long term relationship, I am still looking for the "one". For me it sucks, most women are taken and there are not many prospects as dating tends to be skewed in favor of women. Add to that I'm currently living in a small town. I get the odd date but for a 39 yr old male like myself, it's depressing to say the least.

I live in a small town too. Most of the hot decent women are either taken or too young. The ones who are available, most of them have kids. Then some are religious fanatics.

Yes, you're right. Dating in America favors women. So if you have decent money, here's an option for you.

1) Get a passport.
2) Find a 'mail-order bride' site which offers Single gentlemen's romance tours to Latin America, Eastern Europe, or Asia. If you're like me and like Latin women, then 2 good companies are TLCWorldwide and ILoveLatins and both are based in Houston.
3) Learn some of the local language before you go. There will be interpreters, but speaking a bit of the local language will give you a good advantage. I myself wouldn't need an interpreter for communicating, but they usually know the city and will show you good places you can take the women to, so I'd use their services and leave a good tip. Don't go with the expectation of getting laid or even marrying a certain woman. However, speaking from personal experiences, you might want to bring condoms just in case.

Yes, the IMBRA law is a pain, but you can get around it by going to another country and meeting a woman there instead of buying addresses and writing before traveling to meet the women. If you find a woman you want to get a fiancee visa for and marry here, going through Catholic Charities is much cheaper than going through an immigration attorney.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 16 (view)
 
North American dating a japanese woman. What do I need to know??
Posted: 11/15/2009 10:12:08 AM
"Anata wa Gakusei desu ne?" means "You're a student, aren't you?"

Well, what American women say they want is totally different than what they settle for. Then again, American usually look at only superficial qualities (physical attractiveness, height, personality) which attract them while totally overlooking nice, not so attractive guys who would be so much better to and for them. Instead, they fall for the jerks and have kids with them. Then he leaves her high and dry and she starts looking for a nice guy who makes good money so he can support her and the kids she had by the jerk. Call it non-PC. I'm just calling it as I see it.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 28 (view)
 
Gotta get out of the friends zone...
Posted: 11/13/2009 3:30:04 PM

Coma White: Definitely do not ask her on a date unless you want to throw this opportunity out the window. It might be too late, but the best thing you can do is take a break, reintroduce yourself and somehow show that you've raised your value. I don't mean how much money you have in the bank, I mean be confident and tease her with the attitude that she wants you. Anything physical should escalate very slowly. This is a mistake I've made a few times. You know, putting your arm around a girl or something like that and keeping it there too long. Do that playfully, and then let her go. Eventually you might see her flirting back with you. I've heard of best friends falling in love etc.

What Coma White described is called the Push Pull Method. Seduction gurus like Ross Jeffries teach this all the time. When she's getting hot, pull back and de-escalate. Then push in and go a little bit further until she's hot again. And so on until you have sex, have an orgasm, and fall asleep.

With kissing, go for light kissing at first. Don't even think about putting your tongue in her mouth until a later escalation. In my experience when I put my hands on a girlfriend's a$$, they pull my hands away. After a few times of doing this, they get really turned on by having your hands on her butt and the passion escalates. I'm not going to go any further with this or my post will look like a Letters to Penthouse submission. But you get the point. A man's libido takes off like a rocket whereas a woman's zig-zags and feels more like a roller coaster ride.

For the moment being, forget about any romance with this one girl. I've seen this technique being used. Approach different women and give them your phone number after having a light conversation. Get theirs too if you can. For every 100 women you give your number to, 3 may call. There's your chance to get some experience, whether with sex or with being in a relationship. Or ideally both!!!

Here's a link with more info: www.tenetsofleykis.com

Think of it as "The Rules" for guys (without the cheesy BS "advice").
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 127 (view)
 
Have you ever fantasized about having sex with a transexual.
Posted: 11/13/2009 3:08:34 PM

aaamm: I would think the anus would be more controlled as there aren't muscles they can put in when they create a vagina that would flex/contract etc. the same as a vagina. They also have to use lubrication as they don't produce it. A vagina is nothing like an azz. A vagina naturally lubricates and contracts in all the right places. It is a shame some men don't appreciate what nature intended the penis to be inserted into.

The anal sphincter is NOT a muscle???

Then again, you have a point. A vagina will grip more of the guy's schlong than the anal sphincter will. Vaginas are great, but unless a man has had a vasectomy or the woman is on the pill or had an operation herself, then she can get pregnant with unprotected vaginal sex. The guy doesn't even need to shoot his wad. Pre-cum fluid by itself can do the trick. Of course I wouldn't recommend anal as something to do every day, but there are times when it's a good substitute (periods and pregnancy come to mind) and if she's clean and both are STD-free, then they can wild with anal sex without a condom and he can unload in her with minimum chances of getting her pregnant.

Of course, if you both want a baby, then have unprotected vaginal sex by all means!
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 25 (view)
 
How many of you speak Irish Gaelic?
Posted: 11/13/2009 2:44:20 PM
True. Same here in America (in the USA; I know that a lot of Spaniards when they say "America" they're referring to Latin America). English is the main language here and so people who come here should at least make an attempt to learn and speak it. With that said, their children will go to public schools and learn English and be socialized as Americans for the most part.

Well, the Galicians and Catalonians feel like their languages are languages unto themselves, not merely a dialect of Castilian Spanish.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 4 (view)
 
North American dating a japanese woman. What do I need to know??
Posted: 11/13/2009 12:42:06 PM

driven2think: Hi there, I was wondering if anyone out there has any advice for me if I was to date a Japanese woman. Things such as cultural dating differences so as not to offend her with any faux pas!

I only want to hear from people who really know & not people who just think this or think that.

Do any of you have any experience with dating japanese women you'd like to share?
Thanks!

In college I dated a Japanese girl named Mariko who was from near Tokyo. She was a really cool girl and even suggested watching porn together. Then again, she was a young girl in college far from home who felt like experimenting. Actually, a lot of college girls are like that!

Learn some of her language and about her culture. Most people in Japan are mixed Shintoists and Buddhists. Japanese people who have never spent much (if any) time abroad don't speak a lot of English to begin with. Some do study Esperanto and that'd be an easy language for you to learn as well. For a while an Esperanto-speaking Japanese girl and I were writing each other in Esperanto through air-mail.

Japan is an ultra-modern country and at the same time they hold on to ancient traditions. Learn something about Zen. Watch Steven Seagal movies, especially "Into the Sun". He lived and studied Aikido in Japan for several years.

If you begin writing to Japanese girls, be a good and prompt pen-pal. Many American women go for guys who are a "challenge" and can't "tame". The same is not true for many Japanese women. Yes, there are cultural differences and Japanese people tend to be more conservative than Americans. Don't bring up the subject of sex until you're in an established relationship. The cost of living in Japan is much higher than what it is anywhere here. Eventually, you'll have to travel to Japan and meet her and her family and they must approve of you, especially with you being a gaijin (foreigner).

Anything you'd learn about how to seduce American women from people like David DeAngelo (the "Double Your Dating" guy), you can mostly throw that out of the window with Japanese women. Remember, our cultures are vastly different. Basically, be on your best behavior with Japanese women and you should do fine.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 145 (view)
 
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 11/13/2009 12:07:35 PM

matariki_sweet: Why do people do it? My two are same father oldest is 11 yrs old and my 6 month old.

I know of one woman where I used to live, on kid number 7 father number 7 does not know who the fathers of the kids are either. But it seems this happens a lot, multiple children in a family where each has a different father, how do you explain to the kids?

Why would someone knowing the person has this many kids with different fathers go ahead and even have sex with the person knowing this? Aren't especisally the men afraid of being on the hook for a child they may not want? Like Duh, if you can't tell what they are like with 7 kids all different men, then there is something wrong.

I feel its not fair to the kids at all. If my mother or father for that matter had kids all over the place, I think I would lose respect for them.

I have a female cousin just like that. She likes Hispanic guys and all of her kids are by a different sperm donor. Not too long ago some of them got taken away from her by CPS. I think all of her kids got along well with each other in spite of the circumstance.

When she was still living in Texas she starting dating a younger Hispanic guy. He told his work buddies what a great girlfriend he had. When he told them who she was, all of his work buddies was saying they'd all been with her sexually. Naturally, he got pi$$ed off and eventually left her.

My older brother has had kids by at least 3 different women as well. Two from his first wife. One from a woman he had an affair with. Two with his second wife; the youngest they gave away, but we know each other. He's 6'1" and has an engaging personality at first, then when a woman moves in with him he quits working and becomes all moody. Finally, the woman leaves him and he moves back in with Mom.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 78 (view)
 
Am I wrong?
Posted: 11/13/2009 11:56:41 AM
Well, now in Texas not paying child support is not even an option. However, they don't enforce the law like they should. On the other hand, the mother is getting tax-free money and should be held accountable for what she spends that money on.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Well you chose them
Posted: 11/13/2009 11:52:19 AM
Both men and women can show your their better side before you have a serious committed relationship with them.

Men may act like total gentlemen and once they get married they "become" total a$$holes!!!

Women may act like total ladies outside the bedroom and do all kinds of kinky things in the bedroom. She may even cook and clean. Once they get married that all flies out the window!!!

Marrying for "love" is a relatively recent thing. A woman is lucky if a guy shows her what a jerk he is before a serious relationship develops. She's not all that bright if she chooses to stay with such a guy. Chances are, she has male friends she wouldn't even consider romantically or sexually, but most likely they're much better choices for her. Unfortunately, she stays with the guy she feels attraction for. She winds up with kids and after years of being with the Jerk she goes for the Nice Guy who now makes good money (yes, that's a qualifier) so he can support her and the kids she had with the Jerk.

Yes, men make bad choices too, especially nice guys. They'll put up with whatever bull$hit she throws his way. She could even suggest golden and brown showers on him and he'd go for it! Of course, she'd never respect him as a man.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 45 (view)
 
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/13/2009 11:34:09 AM

scenicgirl1: hey seatown, there are plenty of us unmarried no kids in Ireland!! Average age of first child here is 31 and average age of marrige is 30. Lots of single baggage free youthful 30 something single girls here!

Whoo-hoo!
I've found that to be true in Brazil as well. I was 30 went I went there and my girlfriend at the time was 9 months older than me, maybe a centimeter or inch taller as well. I find that in countries where a lot of men are womanizers and drunkards, there are a lot of single women in their 30s.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 44 (view)
 
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/13/2009 11:28:14 AM
While it sucks not feeling the touch of a woman in bed at night, it's not all that bad. At least I'm not with a woman who'd be totally wrong me. Like that's supposed to cheer me up, right?

There are great things about living on my own. I can have the temperature set to whatever makes me most comfortable. I can cook whatever I want for myself and not worry about whether a girlfriend or wife will like it as well. I don't have to share space with anyone else. That's a huge plus because some women really love their footwear! Shopping and eating out (2-3 times a week for me) is much less expensive.

With that said, my ideal woman would have a good career with great pay and have no children or any desire for them.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 129 (view)
 
Why Do Men Think All Women Like Their 12 Inchers?????
Posted: 11/13/2009 11:19:02 AM
It's funny. I used to look at Hustler magazines and one of the cartoons displayed a black dude with a HUGE pecker. He had just gotten his penile enlarger pump and couldn't even get it in!!!

 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 122 (view)
 
Have you ever fantasized about having sex with a transexual.
Posted: 11/13/2009 11:14:27 AM
I've seen tranny/shemale webpages and the women look hot. Without a vagina, they're more willing to let you do 'em up the butt!

However, in reality it would be totally different. She might want you to suck her schlong and bend over so she can stimilute your prostate. I don't think that would appeal to most straight guys.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 183 (view)
 
What is sexy about FAT???
Posted: 11/13/2009 11:09:22 AM
Different strokes for different folks. I think a lot of guys go for bigger women because they think they'd have a better chance of having sex with them. Not me. I don't even like the prednisone belly I've gotten since getting a transplant. Not that I have a bad body image, but you get the point.

Other guys may go for bigger women since they think a bigger woman has less of a chance of getting another boyfriend or sex partner.

Like I said, different strokes for different folks.
 el.metaleiro
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 295 (view)
 
ok boys which do u prefer boobs or butts?
Posted: 11/13/2009 11:03:09 AM

Prepmonroe: I was just wondering cuz i am a female with small breast and a big booty lol. Most people say i have a jlo or kim kardashian butt. Even though i like my hour glass figure i do wish i had more up top. Some guys seem so in aww of my ass lol. N i was just wondering why some guys like ass so much?

You're the kind of gal I love physically!

Well, we guys love curves on women. (Curves, not folds of flesh.)
I had a Brazilian girlfriend just like that and after her another Latina girlfriend like that. Guess I love women with natural tans!
A nice a$$ on a woman basically begs men to do all kinds of things with it, basically.
 
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