Gving up on this whole idea.. chat & forums.

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kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 22 (view)

Gving up on this whole idea.. Posted: 10/11/2009 7:31:03 PM
Yea, we all hit those rough spots and some are longer than others. Take a break if you need to but not too long, gotta get back to phishing

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 17 (view)

Is a cancelled date legit?? Posted: 10/11/2009 7:28:37 PM
Time to move on ... he's not being considerate of your time

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 25 (view)

Advice Posted: 10/6/2009 8:17:15 PM
Yea, its okay since he's trying to get a female perspective on how to improve your relationship.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 73 (view)

Girls making the first move??? Posted: 10/6/2009 8:11:35 PM
I think its great. Just say hi and go from there.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 48 (view)

Dating in the workplace? Posted: 8/17/2009 7:25:58 PM
Not a good idea to date people you work with especially at such a small place of work.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 62 (view)

Should I go out with a guy 16 years younger? Posted: 8/14/2009 4:41:08 PM
Sure why not. You are both of an age that its not a big deal.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

question about girls contacting guys. Posted: 8/14/2009 4:38:51 PM
I think its great when a woman initiates first contact. I wouldn't rub this in her face ... what for we are together that's what counts.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 21 (view)

What do you miss Posted: 8/14/2009 4:36:04 PM
Someone to cuddle with

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

How to get comfortable with a guy.... Posted: 8/9/2009 8:13:44 PM
Meet in a public place and continue to meet in a public place until you are comfortable with him.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

thought things were going well... Posted: 8/9/2009 8:10:15 PM
Be a little more patient and try calling him again.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 466 (view)

How important is chivalry in an relationship to you? Posted: 8/9/2009 8:08:21 PM
I would like to think chivalry is still still strong in my relationships.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

opinions needed please Posted: 12/3/2008 9:49:11 PM
Relax and be patient ... you two will meet up

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

am i just imagining it? Posted: 12/2/2008 5:37:59 PM
How much time at work do you two spend interacting ... if its among other people ... also how much time do you two spend alone interacting at work. Maybe you two just see each other too much at work for being so early in a relationship.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 19 (view)

is he really into me? Posted: 11/29/2008 11:10:53 AM
Find a good therapist to help you not to sabotage your relationships and help you to better cope and feel better about your behavior and relationships.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

Some help please! Posted: 11/27/2008 10:32:37 PM
Thanks on the feedback about the opening sentences. I do want to come across as serious but not weed out unnecessarily.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 15 (view)

What do guys want to know when reading a profile? Posted: 11/27/2008 5:39:42 PM
Putting down average is fine. You have a full length pic so most guys can decide on their preference. You may want to have another full length pic that is a bit more flattering. Still too many interests ... its over whelming You may want to consolidate your movie interests ... you mention it several times Add just a bit more upbeat things about the person you are looking for

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

Am I really THAT bad!!!!! Posted: 11/27/2008 5:34:09 PM
Get rid of the pic that has your friend cut out of it. Add a pic that is a full length body shot. Put your first statement at the end of your profile. Winks, I think is for match not pof Get rid of the well what do you want to know. Sounds very self absorbed. Your not trying to sell yourself with this wording. Get rid of the wording your share of useless men it sounds very negative. Add a little more of what your interests are and more about the positive qualities you are looking for in someone.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

I would love a guys opinion Posted: 11/27/2008 4:38:02 PM
Yes, add a full length pic of yourself. The rest of the pics look good. Generally speaking run spell check and include capitals and apostrophes for contractions. Your first date description is too long. Make it simple and positive. No need to be negative. Definitely not a movie for a first date ... you want something so that you two can talk and get to know each other.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 9 (view)

What do guys want to know when reading a profile? Posted: 11/27/2008 4:32:43 PM
Your pics look good ... one question are you wearing sunglasses on top of your head in each of them? The Hang Out status would turn me off from e-mailing ... it sounds like you just want friends. Put the pics comment at the end. No need to start off negative. Get rid of the bullet points comment. Get rid of the headings "About Me" "About You." Get rid of the typical female comment. Just use one PS not two.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

Some help please! Posted: 11/27/2008 8:47:01 AM
Thanks! I didn't know the pics were not showing up.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

Frustrated... feedback please Posted: 11/27/2008 7:02:40 AM
Pictures: Remove the one that is dark with the ocean background. Remove the one with the dolphin. The rest are okay to good. You have way too many interests ... shorten them down. The wording "I would rather we ..." is a bit awkward ... try I prefer we I get the patience of developing a relationship, however the wording "as long as a vetting process as I need" is very one sided. It shows a very high level of being picky and that it only you being picky in the relationship. Its just a turn off. The next sentence just reinforces this idea. Ditch the sentence in the world of Disney. We guys talk and this is a red flag to us of someone who has fairy tale expectations of relationships ... word on the street is to run the other way fast.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

Please, what am I doing wrong? Posted: 11/26/2008 10:25:36 PM
Pics look good. Add one with a full length body shot. misspelling on fairy tales The tone about the person you want to meet is very serious about the drinking part ... consolidate the comments. Serves as a flag about personal drinking issues or past relationships. misspelled positive overall looks good

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

need input Posted: 11/26/2008 10:20:10 PM
Update your pics with something more flattering ... smile! Ditch the present pic posted You need to do more of a sell job on your profile ... what do you like to do in your spare time, what do you like to do for fun. Add more about the person you are looking for.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

New member in need of a review. Posted: 11/26/2008 10:17:29 PM
Welcome ... now here's the feedback Get rid of the pic that is dark ... its not flattering, can't see you , your not smiling. Add a full length body pic. When guys see too many headshots they worry that there is a "reason" why there are no body shots. The listing thing can work, but you may want to consider paragraph format. Get rid of the turnoffs list in the guy and make it a list about what type of guy you are attracted to ... the current list just screams your feed up with guys in general Your list. 1. about honesty comes across like a **** who hides behind the word "honesty" 5. reinforces the idea of no full length pics, but serves as a contridiction ... if your are so comfortable where is the pic? 8. Just leaves me laughing ... guess the guy needs to approach with an open wallet for that "once in awhile" 9. "understood that great" add an s to the end of that 11. reinforces my comment about number 1 12. Just confirms number 1 and number 11 ... in which case only doormats apply here or men who want drama and arguing with a nuerotic, insecure person.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

Any Suggestions or Construction Criticism? Posted: 11/26/2008 10:06:25 PM
Try smiling with your pearly whites showing in your next pic. Other than that the pics look great. I'm not sure what skinny dipping "not familiar" means. "while I sometimes I dress" need to clean this up grammaticlly I see how your trying to walk a fine line of being fun and party like but not prudish. Overall it comes across as more prudish. The following hollers prudish and puts you over the edge " However, while I sometimes I dress skimpy, I am not going to post provocative and slutty photos and there is a difference. I realize what is appropriate for me at age 19 and with my figure and youthful appearance my not be appropriate when I'm 25." The following would only be posted if you are looking for a husband so ax it. "My parents have been together since I was just a twinkle in their eye and both are college graduates. My father, whom I simply adore, is a scientist and has taught me to look for the real reason and not just clichés." The following seems to contridict itself ... what is a future with especially combined with the paragraph about your parents being together? "I'm not ready to get married. However, anything is possible so I’m only interested in dating a guy if I see him as someone I could want a future with." This seems awkward to say "If you are still with me"

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Some help please! Posted: 11/26/2008 9:54:04 PM
Please let me know what I need to change in what I've written. Also let me know what pictures I should keep and which ones I should delete. I know the first line is a little direct but I keep meeting the wrong people so I was hoping that it would help out. Thanks ahead of time for your all of your help!

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

Go ahead, take a look! Posted: 11/25/2008 10:31:30 PM
You don't need your height since it is displayed. no hair color since the pictures speak for themselves. No need to mention that you won't screw a guy over or play games ... it actually makes me worried that that is what you do You mention rehabbing songbirds twice. You mention Rome twice ... consolidate Get rid of your new job comment it doesn't really add anything ... its filler Ditch the comment on leg wrestling ... it sparks up images of an oversized leg. Get rid of some of the movies its overkill the number you have down. pics look good except for the one of you in denim shirt lying on your side ... add a full lengthy body pic ... too many face shots and no body shots get guys worried your hiding weight issues. MSN chat comment for first meet ... for me personally would be a turn off ... I do not IM

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 13 (view)

ok...I'm open for evaluation!!!!!! Posted: 11/25/2008 5:16:51 PM
You need to describe yourself and specific interests as well as the person you are looking for. The following statements sound a bit negative and are a turn off. Maybe you can blend them into a nice paragraph about the person you are looking for. I do not like someone who is too serious and controlling. If you do not have the time to get to know me, then how am I going to know who you are? Spelling error on be love ... should read "be loved" Your pics are good except not sure if you are a blonde or brunnette.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 19 (view)

Women and Fetishes? Posted: 11/24/2008 8:45:46 AM
Fetish is a very broad term ... from what I've read and heard from women ... yes. I think generally speaking women's as a percentage tend to be different from men's fetishes. But lets look at the definition ... fetish - any object or nongenital part of the body that causes a habitual erotic response or fixation. This means if you are turned on by tall men ... this would be a fetish. If you are turned on by brunettes this would be a fetish. If you turned on by the type of car the guy drives this would be a fetish. If you are turned on by a guy in uniform this would be a fetish.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 491 (view)

for the ladies....can you TRULY say money ain't a factor? Posted: 11/24/2008 7:16:32 AM
Yes, it matters ... their is a minimum amount of money a man must earn ... this number differs from woman to woman. Such that it is a reason why less men are marrying ... ... interesting fact ... 30 years ago 91 percent of men would eventually get married compared to 91 percent women (about even). Now 87% of men eventually get married while 91% women still get married. For both men and women the major portion of people who don't married are gay. However with men the decrease in percentage represents men who do not have a college degree and/or have lower incomes than other men.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 12 (view)

Can't tell what guys are thinking when they do this.... Posted: 11/24/2008 7:01:59 AM
What is the context? Work, school, group of mutual friends?

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

Do men change their minds? Posted: 11/23/2008 3:21:28 PM
Its about supply and demand ... if a guy hasn't gone on a date for a while then maybe. Or just plain old getting drunk and something happens.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 19 (view)

It's not you... It's me Posted: 11/23/2008 8:53:52 AM
I need to know, because I just heard this line yesterday. While I don't want to share my inner most personal business, I'm hurting. And I simply want answers. Yes, you are looking for answers ... we can make suggestions but the only true answer is from the guy you were going out with. Since you won't really know what he was thinking the only true answer is that it didn't work out for you two and its time to move on. From my perspective over time guys say these things because they have learned what to say from girls saying it to them/us/me. What ever the reason for the break up guys/girls just try to make the situation less awkward so that the other person is not so bummed out and wondering about "answers" afterwards. As a guy who has played the role of pursuer it comes with the territory of rejection ... in these situations its best to just move on to the next person or this can become an obsession that just keeps you bummed out while you miss the opportunity to date a really great guy.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

Do guys really like the chase? Posted: 11/23/2008 8:43:55 AM
I think during the first month its probably best to let the guy chase you a bit ... for 2 reasons. Some guys like the chase. And moving too fast with phone calls in the beginning freaks out guys (like me) that you maybe too emotionally needy. Getting bored depends. I think about it this way ... the guy who is going to be a boyfriend isn't going to get bored ... at least for a while. But the other guys get bored because they don't won't a relationship or there just isn't a spark for a serious relationship. As for the thrill of the chase ... I guess there are men who really enjoy it. Personally I use to chase women big time when I was 21 or younger. I realized that this group of women usually just toyed with men/boys at that age. Then when I turned around 28 I realized something else that it became easier to date women because they started being more direct (not entirely just more) such that it became much easier to date. Now at 37 I can say each year its has been getting easier since women are becoming more and more direct. Personally if a woman plays really hard to get then forget I'm out ... I prefer just a little chase. If it goes on for too long (i.e. past the 2nd or 3rd date) then I'm out ... I'm like we like each other what's the deal with the chase especially when its much easier with other women. The women who believe I would stay at this point for the chase just are wrong ... I simply move on and don't stay around.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

Was I just a last minute convenience to him or am I overanalyzing the situation? Posted: 11/23/2008 8:29:03 AM
Just take this as a learning experience of holding back from falling for a guys so soon and how to better communicate your dating needs. It would seem that the higher likelyhood is that you had a guy looking for a causal relationship. But unsure, since you two were not having sex yet. I would guess if you two weren't having sex right away he would end the relationship. Although he did get something in the bedroom and have you sleep over which to him might be at least a warm body. Then again, he may have been holding back while he decided which if he wanted a serious relationship with you or not ... we wont' know for sure. Yes, you really needed to talk to him about his behavior rather than doing the whole not calling him deal. Given you two were still in the probationary period you didn't need to have the serious relationship discussion. Just call him on making plans at the last minute. Him not calling when he said he would is inconsiderate. Not sure if it was worthy of being angry over ... since you weren't returning his calls the entire weekend as well which is also inconsiderate.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

I want to know!!!! Posted: 11/23/2008 8:18:50 AM
Just the guys you've gone out so far with. Not all guys are like this.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 107 (view)

Would you date someone who has had an orgy with 3+ men? Posted: 11/20/2008 10:15:56 AM
No it should not prevent you from pursuing more of a relationship with this woman ... it does prompt more questions. Why is she telling you this? She doesn't have to. Is she hoping that you may be interested in the same activity and wants to do it again. As others have said is she testing you and has other "mistakes" that she's feeling out that you can handle. Is this her way of sabotaging relationships? Is she into full discloser about past "mistakes" and expects the same from you ... and if you don't she'll be angry when your stuff comes out later? ... all you can do is ask her why she felt it important to disclose this information so early in the relationship ... and take her at her word until proven otherwise. Overall, as others have said ... its her past big deal. What is important is the potential relationship you two could have.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

Dating for 6 Months Yet Does Not Call Me All Week Posted: 11/19/2008 8:54:45 PM
have you asked him if this is typical behavior prior to his messy break up ... maybe this is how he dates/interacts. Either way you deserve more communication during the week. How long has it been since his break up ... how long were they together ... did he propose ... did they live together.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 326 (view)

Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here? Posted: 11/19/2008 8:41:04 PM
[]You guys who are claiming you've only received a few messages in a year must be joking or have a really bad profile. (which you can always correct)[ /] Not joking not a bad profile ... 5'5", I've had a total of 30 people (men, gay men, and women) give me feedback on my profile and have changed my profile 12 times, the profile I post when I'm looking is very well written, the pics I post have been approved by several people (men, gay men, women) that they look like me and are flattering. Some of us just have to work at it a bit harder. I've noticed that the last few gentlemen that have mentioned that they do get messages from women that are not initiated are 6 feet tall or taller ...

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 36 (view)

Do you ask others out in person as much as you do here? Posted: 11/19/2008 7:59:56 PM
Yes, on-line dating has minimized the amount of woman I ask out in the real world. Especially when I do have dates from off-line which means I'm not out trolling the bars.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 102 (view)

How long should one wait at a meeting place? Posted: 11/19/2008 10:45:18 AM
interesting ... I'll wait 15 minutes then call ... if they don't pick up I'll leave a message ... and wait 5 more minutes then I'll leave unless I'm enjoying where I'm at for what ever reason.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 57 (view)

recycling the eligibles pool Posted: 11/19/2008 10:36:02 AM
Yes, I have a number of times ... in some cases we've dated for a couple of months.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 171 (view)

0 roses... Would you email them? Posted: 11/19/2008 10:33:15 AM
I wasn't aware there were people who paid attention to how many roses a person has sent and use it as a criteria to weed people out.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 354 (view)

Should women show cleavage on first date Posted: 11/18/2008 10:58:27 PM
yes ... works for me :)

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 312 (view)

Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here? Posted: 11/18/2008 10:48:49 PM
I have been getting one message (when I have a pic and profile) per year for the last 3 years before that maybe one message every 2 years. I'm not talking about people replying to me rather the people who initiate contact.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 33 (view)

Does self-depreciating humor have a place in a dating situation? Posted: 11/18/2008 7:22:54 PM
no ... it demonstrates insecurity.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 25 (view)

Picky Posted: 11/18/2008 7:04:32 PM
it depends what someone is being picky about if it is about shallowness then maybe too picky applies

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 39 (view)

How many Friends with Benefits can you have going at one time? Posted: 11/18/2008 6:32:51 PM
I only have one ... but I have been known to juggle 4 at a time in my younger days.

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 94 (view)

the positive weight thing thread Posted: 11/18/2008 5:37:06 PM
Yes ... everybodys preference is not the same

kewlpeeps

Joined: 10/27/2006

Msg: 19 (view)

Does anyone get Burned out~~~~~ Posted: 11/18/2008 5:26:49 PM
Yea, I find I just have to take a break from it just to add another layer of thick skin

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