Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? chat & forums.

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Thread: Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 193 (view)

Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? Posted: 3/12/2009 9:02:56 PM
I hope it's equally disturbing to you when you consider that many of those single mothers and children were abandoned by the fathers who probably don't pay support.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 20 (view)

Happy single parent? Posted: 3/12/2009 8:59:47 PM
Consider this: You may actually be secretly envied! Many years ago when I was married (& hating it) I was friends with a single mom and I wanted her life! Plus, a few months ago an acquaintance of mine told me (after a few drinks) I'm her inspiration because she wants to leave her husband!

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 17 (view)

Mum of 2 kids 24/7 - no family near and ex choosen to forget them. Will I find love? Posted: 3/12/2009 8:52:02 PM
It sounds like you're possibly using your kids as your excuse not to date. Your kids are old enough to be left alone together. Also, have you considered that your kids are overscheduled?

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 23 (view)

Wonderful child care provider but........boundaries? Posted: 3/6/2009 9:04:46 PM
I would probably leave it. If you say something it might cause some awkwardness and resentment. I don't think it's a big enough deal to risk that. She may be trying to show you how much she cares about your son. If it helps at all, one of my daycare providers says "I love you, I love you baby" to my daughter all the time. I thought it was weird at first, but now it just rolls over me.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 39 (view)

Should Single Parents be allowed to have invitro? Posted: 3/6/2009 8:41:36 PM
I was initially turned off by this story as well, but I have thought about it a bit and listened to a CBC piece on it. There are so many issues and angles, there is no pat answer. To answer the title question, yes, single parents should be "allowed" to have in vitro. Just as married parents are "allowed" to have in vitro, and black people and white people and gay people, etc. Nadia was apparently implanted with 6 embryos, and 2 of them split. Fertility clinics routinely implant multiple embryos because usually some die, and the more that "take", the better the clinic's stats. We need to ask ourselves what we are afraid of here. If we're afraid of the children becoming a burden on the "system", we must also not ignore the other ways we shirk personal responsibility and become burdens on the system. For example, if you're obese, YOU'RE A BURDEN ON THE SYSTEM. If you're a smoker, YOU'RE (likely or likely going to be) A BURDEN ON THE SYSTEM. If you choose to engage in risky behaviour, and have an accident, or get HIV, then you're a burden on the system. Let's not be HYPOCRITES people. You're all probably a burden in some ways. And if you're not now, you will be when you're old. And I agree with the guy above me about religious people clouding their children's minds. Indoctrination - that is the ultimate irresponsibility.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 49 (view)

What does one do? Posted: 2/28/2009 8:54:40 PM
You tell her. Please tell her. Why would you not tell her? So she can continue to be deceived and lied to and have her health put at risk? Staying in a lie of a marriage is not better than being a single mother living an authentic life, with the opportunity of meeting someone HONEST. She MAY already know, and be choosing to partake in the lie. If you approach her sensitively, it has the potential to bring you two closer. If the tables were turned, wouldn't YOU want to be told?

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 546 (view)

What is wrong with men? Posted: 2/28/2009 8:35:38 PM
I sympathize. This has been happening to me ever since I was about 12. Now I'm 37, and I routinely get messaged from men in their 50s. It's because the most important thing to (most) men is women's youth and beauty. It's flattering and disgusting at the same time.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 66 (view)

Another question to single parents (being brutal here) Posted: 1/29/2009 9:38:06 PM
Maybe people with similar issues meet each other on here and find that they really connect! Single parents with "issues" likely relate better to other single parents with "issues", than to single-never married-no kids people.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 41 (view)

Found out my partner is secretly bisexual!! Devastated!! Posted: 1/22/2009 8:45:55 PM
Um, I'd get out. Now. He has likely already HAD homosexual encounters. You're putting yourself at risk of STDs and HIV. I feel for you. But this person is living a lie, and using you.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 26 (view)

Calling All Divorcees Posted: 1/20/2009 8:51:22 PM
And the research backs up your observations - women DO initiate divorces more often than men. I've also come across some research that says length of marriage is correlated with low IQ for women - meaning, the longer a woman is married, the lower her IQ *on average* (I don't want to hear anecdotes about oh, but my aunt has a PhD and has been married for 50 years!!! I'm talking ON AVERAGE). The smart ones get out, or don't get married in the first place. The women with options get out if they're unhappy. The women with no or fewer options are much more likely to stay in a bad marriage.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 28 (view)

he's still on POF Posted: 1/20/2009 8:45:22 PM
I would talk to him first. However, if the two of you had established that you were committed and exclusive, then I probably wouldn't trust him any longer, which doesn't work very well down the road. When you don't trust someone you're not at peace - your mental energy is going toward wondering what that person is doing, and it's not worth it.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 42 (view)

Would you consider this selfish? Posted: 1/19/2009 8:44:34 PM
It's not selfish. It's totally reasonable. And it's not "unfair" to those who could be great, it's actually being fair to them, because you are being HONEST.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

Should your ex answer your calls? Posted: 1/17/2009 10:34:40 PM
Hi everyone, thanks for your responses. I only ever call him to return his calls, organize kid access, and deal with court stuff (he has taken me to court recently trying to get out of child support, etc. (which didn't work)). I don't bug him at all, in fact, I hate talking to him. The maybe one call per day is an average - some days there may be none, some days there may be two or three (like when you have to check your calendar and get back to them or something). He called back - he's in Chilliwack for the entire weekend at a "curling bonspiel" aka drinking party. He didn't even tell me, even when he has a sick baby. I just wish he cared about his kids more. I could NEVER go away for the wknd and leave my sick baby. By the way, he has two other kids with his first wife, who left him for all the selfish reasons I now see.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Should your ex answer your calls? Posted: 1/17/2009 9:05:37 PM
Hi everyone, I have two young children by my ex, ages 1 and 3. My ex has a cell phone that's paid for by his work, but it's partly to enable him to take work-related calls any time. He has unlimited minutes and uses his cell as his personal phone. Quite often, i'd say about one out of every two or three calls I make to him he doesn't answer. Yes, he has call display. And I call him very infrequently, like maybe not even once a day on average. Remember we have two very little kids together. It makes me think of the possibility of not being able to get hold of him if there was an emergency. Both our kids have been sick this past week, and our baby is still sick. She threw up a little bit of blood yesterday (maybe one teaspoon) and I called him and he didn't really seem too concerned. He has not called me since to ask about her and he isn't answering his phone. This is what he does. What do you think of this behaviour?

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 73 (view)

3 different dads/moms? Posted: 1/16/2009 9:50:31 PM
Probably not. 3 kids by one or two mothers but probably not three. I think that indicates a pattern of lack of commitment and irresponsibility.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 21 (view)

How do you make a relationship work when the person you love won't stand up? Posted: 1/16/2009 9:43:30 PM
You probably can't make it work. This is a serious issue, and unlikely to change. I've experienced it, and now my ex lives with his parents, and he's 41. His mother does everything for him, even irons his shirts. She does all his cooking and housework, and takes care of his (4) kids whenever he wants. It's almost like, why would he ever want to leave? He has a servant basically.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 167 (view)

Does anyone else here pay attention to the backgrounds of the profile pics? Posted: 1/16/2009 9:31:16 PM
Yes!!! If the room has clothes, etc. all over it I won't respond. If it looks like a run-down rented apartment I won't respond. If there's a harley, muscle car, or any kind of tricked-out car I won't respond either!

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 33 (view)

I'm an idiot. Posted: 1/16/2009 9:24:34 PM
That's really sad. I feel for you. My advice would be to try to walk away, sever all contact, because he will continue to use you at his convenience. You need to ask yourself why you lost your virginity to someone who made it clear to you he was not interested in a commitment.

genipher

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 229 (view)

The worst breakup line ever Posted: 1/16/2009 9:18:11 PM
It's pretty general. It needs to be explained more fully by the person saying it. I think I understand it cuz I was in that situation once - for me it meant I loved the person like a brother or dear friend, but was not attracted to them physically or intellectually, and did not want to spend the rest of my life with them.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 98 (view)

Prenuptial - maintaining physique - is it reasonable? Posted: 9/7/2008 8:19:30 PM
As reasonable as a woman saying the husband would have to maintain a six figure income, and if he got demoted, laid-off, etc., she could leave and would not have to give him half of everything.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 92 (view)

Crazy Neighbour - help me! Posted: 9/7/2008 7:03:53 PM
Shieldvulf, you're right that I'm not taking the advice to cut off all contact. But asking for advice does not mean I have to take it. As for your claim that I'm seeking attention, um, isn't that what people do here - ask for advice? I find it kindof ironic that you would be in a chat room telling a poster she's attention-seeking. As for your comment about how I got pregnant (which I'm not), you lose any credibility you may have had. You work for a non-profit? HS, I hope it isn't one where you have to have compassion for anything!

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 112 (view)

Does the size of the ring matter ? Posted: 9/6/2008 10:43:41 PM
Just make sure it's AT LEAST as big as any ex's engagement ring - mine wasn't, and cost way less. I know, because I found both receipts!

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 77 (view)

Crazy Neighbour - help me! Posted: 9/6/2008 10:31:11 PM
Wow, you guys have been awesome with the empathy and suggestions. JoeyBlueEyes, Silken Fire, thank you so much for the info. He left bakery buns hanging on my doorknob yesterday, but without the cakes and cookies that used to come with them. Today he gave me 2 pairs of his daughter's old jeans for my baby. OMG, I accepted them but I didn't know what to do! I think it was probably ok to accept second-hand jeans . . . ? He also gave me this candy that's supposed to substitute for coffee cuz he thinks I drink too much coffee - he even dumped out my coffee the other day. What I can't stand is that when he talks to me he gets right in my face and I can smell his yucky breath and he often spits on me when he talks - it's so gross - I'm thinking I should get a hepatitis vaccine . . . I'm trying to talk to him less/spend less time outside when he's out there. I wish he would get a job!

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 64 (view)

Crazy Neighbour - help me! Posted: 9/4/2008 5:34:56 PM
Hi everyone, Ok, he's acting pissed off with me. I think it's because he could tell I was really weirded out yesterday with the food he gave me. Plus I'm not talking to him as much. I think my plan right now is to try to have the attention from him peter out rather than confront him on it. So I will be less friendly with him and hope he gets the hint. And I won't accept any more stuff. Of course I was friendly with him at first, I mean he is my neighbour! Ya can't fault me for that. Normal people would realize it's just me being a friendly neighbour. Other stuff he's given me: a potted rose, flowers in a vase, an Ipod adapter for my car, clothes for my baby, his old patio furniture, a couple of his old baby items, new toy water gun for my son, etc. The second-hand stuff I don't really have a problem with, but him buying new stuff for me/my kids is weird and inappropriate, and the flowers are super-weird. Plus he didn't like the first 2 places I put the rose, so I moved it twice. Can you say controlling? About his wife: I wouldn't be surprised if she's abused. She looks so unhappy. She barely looks anyone in the eye, and never goes outside, just from house to car and back. I don't feel comfortable right now involving her. The people-watching thing in my profile is that I think people are interesting - sometimes if I'm in a mall or a coffee shop, I just look around and try to maybe guess what the people around me do for a living, if they look like parents, etc. Is that weird? And I realize I'm taking a risk posting about this, because he could very well be on POF!

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 52 (view)

Crazy Neighbour - help me! Posted: 9/4/2008 10:56:55 AM
Thanks for the responses - I totally appreciate it. P.S. I live in Canada where maternity leave is one year long (we get 55% of our prior income for this one year), and my baby is 10 months old now.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 38 (view)

Crazy Neighbour - help me! Posted: 9/3/2008 10:47:49 PM
Hi Everyone, Thank you for all the great advice. I read every single post carefully. I should have stopped accepting things from him after the first couple of times. I have trouble being direct because I don't want to "hurt anyone's feelings". And I wanted my neighbours to like me. I didn't want him to feel insulted. But now I realize his behaviour is bizarre and scary. Now I'm even more worried about insulting him. But I know I need to do something about this. Some great suggestions were given that I'm definitely thinking about. Another red flag about him is that he has 3 kids from his first marriage that he doesn't see at all. Any more advice would be appreciated . . . P.S. I'm on maternity leave from my teaching position so I'm home a lot during the day.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Crazy Neighbour - help me! Posted: 9/3/2008 6:45:49 PM
I moved about 6 weeks ago and one of my new neighbours is waaaaaayyyy too nice - I mean, pathologically nice. Since I've moved here, he's given me food I think every day (except the first 2 days): bakery items, stuff from restaurants, stuff he makes - tonight he gave me a seafood dish he got a friend of his who's a chef to make - he said he bought the ingredients for it (i didn't eat it cuz i don't know this person and I'm feeling really weirded out by this); he has also burned several cds for me, given my kids stuff, and talks to me pretty much the entire time I'm outside. He gets in my personal space. He jokes/teases me but I've noticed lately it has a sinister aspect to it - he's beginning to insult me. (So I guess he's not that nice!) He's married (2nd marriage) with kids. His wife is hardly ever home - she works full-time and he stays home with the kids. She seems depressed. I've never spoken with her. Help me - I want him to leave me alone! But he's my neighbour who I will see practically every day (we live in a townhouse complex). HELP!

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 23 (view)

why do women put up with immature men? Posted: 8/21/2008 10:59:54 PM
Women put up with this type of behaviour because: - they're afraid of being single - they think the guy will change or that they will be able to change him - the alternatives (i.e. other men) aren't appealing - they think most men are like what you've described - they lack self-confidence and self-respect

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 107 (view)

Is being an intellectual no longer attractive ? Posted: 8/21/2008 10:51:33 PM
Intelligence in a guy is the #1 thing I look for. But there are many ways to be intelligent. Someone mentioned she values intuitiveness, and I have to agree that an intuitive guy is very impressive. People who are full of facts are interesting for a while, but it can get annoying. Men who are curious and able to think critically are scrumptious to me!

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 14 (view)

Undue Hardship Posted: 8/21/2008 7:36:35 PM
Thanks everyone for your comments. Please keep them coming! Pantherrr, FMEP actually does charge interest. FMEP can also charge an administration fee if the payor is in arrears which is paid to the provincial gov't. I know, because my ex had to pay both. The admin. fee was $400! For those interested, it's my ex who is trying to claim undue hardship, even though he makes over $80 000/yr., and lives for free with his parents. He doesn't even pay for food and his mother irons his shirts!

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Undue Hardship Posted: 8/16/2008 2:10:15 PM
Does anyone know how easy (or not) it is for someone to claim "Undue Hardship" in order to get their child support payments lowered? I've done lots of web research on it and it sounds difficult to do (in theory). Anyone have any experience with this or knowledge about this?

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 96 (view)

i can't move on, please help Posted: 8/3/2008 10:33:36 PM
I've been there. I so feel for you. Things I do: - think about the universe. Sounds flaky, but think about how huge and vast it is, and how little we know about it, and that we are only a speck - maybe not even that. I think about how insignificant I really am in the context of the entire universe, and it makes me realize how insignificant my problems are (relatively speaking). - think about how much importance you are assigning to this person. Does he really have so much control over you that it would drive you to commit suicide? NO. He is just another insignificant speck.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 4 (view)

What happens when you can no longer have children? Posted: 8/3/2008 10:18:36 PM
There are lots of men out there who have had their kids and don't want any more. And some of them have likely had vasectomies. Maybe you should try to meet a few of them . . . ? Also, on the flipside, this was definitely an issue for me a few years ago when I wanted more kids. I made sure to date only people who were open to that and able to "deliver"! I tried not to waste time with the others. You should be upfront with people about that you don't want and can't have any more kids, so as to make the best use of your time and theirs.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 5 (view)

When someone's kids rule them Posted: 8/1/2008 10:32:22 PM
I've been in a similar situation but probably not as bad as your friends' . . . I moved in with someone who had 2 kids half-time (from a previous marriage). I was floored at how badly behaved they were. Mostly it was because neither of their parents ever said no to them or made them do anything. I refused to take on all the work of these children, who couldn't even hang their jackets on a hook, and it was a major issue in the relationship. I thought it was unfair to me to be expected to do everything for these children, and I tried and tried to get support from their dad, but when I got any support it was weak and insincere. I will be VERY cautious about even dating people with kids now - I mean I know what to look for now in their parenting and what to avoid. I think the problem of kids ruling the parents is unfortunately not uncommon. We need to ask ourselves why we are so scared to discipline our kids.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

Adopted While Single Posted: 8/1/2008 10:15:36 PM
Congratulations on your adoption! And I think it's sweet how you describe how much your son means to you. I'm wondering though - do you really know what people are thinking/assuming? Have you actually talked to these men?

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 13 (view)

Is this abnormal or within the range of normal? Posted: 6/30/2008 10:20:43 AM
Some more info on the guy: he can't read people at all. He misses all social cues and nuances. He has no interest whatsoever in other peoples' relationships. He has lots of aquaintances and drinking buddies, but no close friends, and he doesn't care, because he doesn't need to have close relationships. He doesn't really care about anyone or anything, nothing affects him. He's got a pretty dead soul. It's like he's missing half of what makes people human. It's so weird. I thought it was possibly autism or aspergers but I'm leaning more toward sociopathy.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 20 (view)

Should your ex take your kids if you're sick? Posted: 6/30/2008 10:02:31 AM
EdwardPartSix - You and my ex think alike! I think he does consider it me trying to control him when I asked him to take the kids. He thinks everything is about him, and can't separate his own ego from the best interests of the kids. Thing is, it's not about him. He needs to get over himself, just like it sounds like you do as well!

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Is this abnormal or within the range of normal? Posted: 6/29/2008 10:32:22 PM
I know a guy very well who doesn't seem to have the normal range of emotions/personality traits. He doesn't feel empathy or compassion, doesn't form attachments to people, never feels guilt, and has no insight into himself. His life is pretty messed up and he doesn't even seem bothered by it. He's 41 with 4 kids by 2 different women, is in major debt, and lives with his parents, but always seems to have a sunny disposition. He's also quite intelligent (but not emotionally intelligent), charming, good-looking, and appears to people who don't know him to be well-adjusted. Would you say this is in the range of normal guy behaviour/personality, or is this abnormal? I'm thinking he has many sociopathic traits.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 18 (view)

So is my friend cheating? Posted: 6/29/2008 10:14:01 PM
Statestreet, thank you for having some sense of morality. Yes, your friend is cheating. I hope the girlfriend finds out about it and dumps his ay ess ess. It just saddens me so much that this kind of stuff happens with such frequency. If I was Girl A, I would love you forever for telling me my so-called boyfriend did this.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 34 (view)

I NEED A WOMAN'S ADVICE!!! HELP ME!!! Posted: 6/29/2008 9:50:48 PM
Uh, yeah, I just don't understand how people can have these kinds of relationships. How can you be so focussed just on the sex? What about her mind, personality, etc? Really, I just don't get it. It would feel way too detached and shallow for me.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 37 (view)

31 and divorced male... How do I get past this. Posted: 6/29/2008 9:31:47 PM
Being 31 and divorced with a child probably isn't the problem. The red flag for me is when you say your ex prevents you from seeing the child. It looks like an excuse not to be involved with your child, and it makes you look like you probably blame your ex for everything else too, and that you have no insight into yourself. I'm not even sure an ex can prevent the other parent from seeing the child. As for telling people your status, you need to be upfront. Not being so makes a person look evasive and untrustworthy. It would also make you look like you're ashamed of it, and hopefully you're not ashamed of having a child.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 38 (view)

visitation and dealing with it Posted: 6/28/2008 9:53:38 PM
I would be hesitant to let a 2 yr-old stay overnight with the father. Just last night I was doing some research on the net about this and the recommendation was no overnights until age 3 - 4.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 1 (view)

Should your ex take your kids if you're sick? Posted: 6/28/2008 9:19:36 PM
Do you think your ex should take your kids if you're too sick to take care of them? I have 3 kids (13, 2, and 8 months). I have joint custody and guardianship with my ex but the childrens' primary residence is with me. On Thurs. morning I was so sick with something (flu?) that I was completely wiped out and could not get out of bed. There was no way I could take care of a 2 yr-old and a baby. I phoned my ex and begged him to take them. He took our 2 yr-old to daycare (which we have 2 days/wk only for the 2 yr-old) but he refused to take care of our baby. He used work as an excuse but he has a really cushy job with lots of freedom, flexibility, and downtime. There is no problem for him to take time off work with no notice but he wouldn't. I had to get my 13 yr-old to take care of the baby. This was the ONLY time I have ever asked him to take our kids because I was sick. I know he could not care less about me, but not taking his baby when I couldn't take care of her puts her in a risky situation. He has joint custody and guardianship - would that not make him equally responsible for our kids? If the tables were turned and he was sick, I would not have hesitated to take my kids. What do you think?

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 52 (view)

I've been deeply wounded. . . Posted: 6/28/2008 6:42:13 PM
He's probably a sociopath - they do stuff like this, and they don't feel bad about it because they don't have a conscience. Best to stay away.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 68 (view)

Too many children? Posted: 6/28/2008 4:51:48 PM
To be honest, I'd be concerned too. But I'd want to get more info. Think about this: There are many 25 year-olds with no children who probably aren't as pretty or intelligent as the one you're talking about. Who would you rather be with? The kids'll be gone after 10 - 15 years (just guessing), but there would still likely be DECADES of time left for you to be with this person without her kids. (Thinking long-term here obviously!)

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 36 (view)

Bad Parenting Behavior Posted: 6/25/2008 10:21:12 PM
Try being a teacher. I've had chairs thrown at me when I was 9 months pregnant. I would say that parents these days are not doing a good enough job of raising polite, respectful children. And surprise, surprise, the worst-behaved kids have the worst-behaved parents.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 17 (view)

Beautiful People Only can apply...WTF.... Posted: 6/25/2008 10:07:56 PM
Thanks Xavery. Being controversial is important I think for the free flow of ideas. I'm not bound by political correctness because I think it's stifling. Personally, I don't really care that this beautiful people site exists - my response to it is just mild curiosity. Plus, beauty isn't really all that subjective. What I think is beautiful you probably also would think is beautiful, as would most people. It's hardwired into us. What is more subjective is style - e.g. some people might think bikers are hot; others would go more for the nerdy type. But if you stripped them naked and stripped off all their tattoos, peircings, etc. we'd all probably agree on their degree of base physical attractiveness.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 49 (view)

Cave man days, bring'em back Posted: 6/25/2008 9:58:01 PM
I voted to NOT delete this thread because I think it's evidence of this person's attitude toward women. lethrnek, some women might be the way you have described but I would venture to say that most aren't. I think you might be confusing the need to feel protected (many women have this need) with wanting to be controlled (I'd say next to none would have this need).

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 14 (view)

Chores/Housework Posted: 6/25/2008 9:50:59 PM
I think you're being taken advantage of and/or letting yourself be taken advantage of. You're busier than him AND doing way more housework than him? That's not right. (Unfortunately, however, it's more common than not that women do more housework and childcare than men when both partners are working full-time.) I think you need to outline to him clearly how much more you're doing than him, ask him how he can contribute more, and hold him accountable. If he doesn't do it, my advice is to perhaps go to counselling. If this issue doesn't resolve I'd leave.

pip35

Joined: 11/4/2006

Msg: 12 (view)

Beautiful People Only can apply...WTF.... Posted: 6/25/2008 9:24:59 PM
I have no problem with it. Why would anyone have a problem with it? There are internet sites for overweight people, and people of different ethnicities, etc. Would you have a problem if the site was for ugly people? Doubt it. There's a flaw though - women's currency is their youth and attractiveness; men's is their status and money. So the site really should be beautiful women and rich men. Deny it all you want, but that's generally the way the world works.

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