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 Author Thread: Be patient or move on?
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Be patient or move on?
Posted: 6/7/2012 4:30:05 PM
Be patient or move on?
....Move it.

we've hung out only twice. .... on the second hang out I tell him I like him
...Yawnsville. Get lost.

"I like him", doesn't scream, "I'm so attracted to him". You may as well be out shopping for a new entry way throw rug.

and would like to see how things progress.
....Its not going to get any better.

Also said his weekends are booked pretty much for the entire month


Yes, "Weekends" are reserved time, for the women will put out, for the women who do want to see him naked.

Oddly enough he checks into his online profile every day. .
....Thats not even close to odd.

Myself, right now I have a lot on my plate too but I've also indicated to him that I am open to perhaps just dinner or something easy during weeknights.
....Only if you buy your own dinner. No fukken way should he be spending any money on you , until you two can become physically intimate, and know what each other look like naked, on a regular basis.

My gut tells me this is simply an easy let-down and I should just move on.
.....Listen to your gut.
Notice your gut is not telling you to get him naked. Now get lost.

I mean really, weekends booked for an entire month? ... LOL ..
....Yes. Freaking deal with it. Get lost.

At best, perhaps his interest in me is just lukewarm
....Perhaps he walks his dogs at 9pm. We're not writing to him. YOU wrote this. YOU have no great desire to see him naked. You "Hung out" twice. Nothing happened. A third time isn't going to change anything. .....Get lost.

Most guys I have met who have a concrete interest would make the time to meet up again no matter how busy ,
.....Sure if they got the feeling you wanted to give him oral delights and rub your hands all over his body. But certainly not if you are looking at him as if you were shopping for a new throw rug.

even if its just a quick, simple weeknight dinner or something ....
......No. Only if you buy your own.

Perhaps I have fallen into the "making myself too available" theme here
.....No. You've fallen into the 7 yo little girl theme. Boys are icky!......Now, get lost.

and should take a step back & be patient?
....No, you should just get lost.

Or should I just take this as an easy let-down and move on?
..... You should drop your butt off a chair , get up , and get lost.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 8 (view)
 
where does sexy stop and sleezy begin?
Posted: 6/6/2012 8:50:51 PM

where does sexy stop and sleezy begin?


Honestly if the woman is at all attractive, and over lapping sexy and sleezy or just being sleezy, I'm still going to get hard wood , and drive it in her knot hole.


just wondering i am 46 have been married since 19 so im really confused about the whole dating "rules"


Its really simple, if you don't feel any sexual chemistry with him by at most the 3rd consecutive meeting with him, you tell him , "Good bye".

First meeting with a guy is should never be more than one hour . Thats more than enough time to tell if you can handle ever being naked with him.

If you see a guy on these "Locating sites" [aka: Dating sites], and YOU think he is attractive, then YOU send him an email and tell him you want to meet him someplace. If he tries to keep you online more than 2 days, 5 at the absolute most, you drop him and move on. Don't give him your number until you have met him in person first.
You don't want some doofus walking around with your number, maybe sharing it with other guys.


hoping to get some opinions on what is considered attractive/sexy for a woman my age.


That answer is going to be almost as varied as the number of males you ask, and the males of all ages.
The 19 yo male, he may take one look at you and cream his pants. So it depends on who you ask.


i really hate to see a woman in her 40s and 50s trying to look 25


Sure that can look sad if she hasn't got the body anymore to pull off the look. But if she has kept her self in shape, I'm not going vomit. I'll get a wood and celebrate one way or the other ;).


my moving my classification to a few extra pounds


Good idea. "Extra pounds" would be a better than "Average".


as the gentleman above suggested.


If men are being "Gentlemen" , you can bet the sunrise he is tellling you a lie.
"Gentleman" is a social polically correct costume. You won't get the truth from a guy who presents himself in this costume , any more than a man will get the truth from a woman pretending in her lady costume.


.i wear a size six.


This means nothing to men. When you talk to men you have to talk in terms we understand. So you would say , "I'm 34 , 30 , 38". Or another term, "Take off your clothes , NOW!"

 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Why does my ex want to be friends?
Posted: 6/6/2012 4:20:35 PM
He is not your ex. He never was you boyfriend. Three and half months is no boyfriend. He is just some guy you dated and there was no chemistry. Don't attach yourself to him in that way.

Sure you don't mind him hanging around and giving you attention and baby sitting your kids. You've got yourself a grade "A" type wussy male.
This is the same as a man finding a nymphomaniac who comes over for a visit and sex, often.
Really difficult to tell them, "Stay away".

After only 3 and half months, this is really premature to come to you for advice about another chick he wants to see naked. Tell him, if you can, "Get lost".
He is wasting your time.
Do not add him to your collection of Friendzoned boys. [Although thats like telling a guy, "Don't add the nymphomaniac to your harem". ]

Your "Friends", be they women or Sallyboys in your friendzone, are right. You need to tell him to get lost. He is no "Ex". He is just some Skippy you dated for 3 months. If you didn't have sex, then he was just some wussy you hung out with.

By telling him he is an ex boyfriend, or telling others , he is an ex boyfriend, you over inflate the closeness of this dating situation. There is no chemistry, there are no deep feelings. Do not fool yourself about the guy.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 4 (view)
 
What do you think?
Posted: 6/6/2012 3:30:39 PM
The solution is simple, throw away those pictures. Get friend to photograph you outside, in better lighting. And wear stuff you normally wear in the summer.

Since your concern is describing your figure, wear clothes the show it off.
The pictures you have now basically suck. They are not good.

The concept of getting a good friend to photograph you is evident, you behave more naturally around your friends, so your friend knows what to capture from you, and you're more relaxed.

You are more than "Few extra pounds" . I can not determine the exact shape of you body from the given photos.
Hour glass, pear , ball? Don't know. So make sure the new photos are clear and well lit.

Don't get into the habit of having "Conversations" online . Tell them , "Lets meet at__for about 30 minutes to one hour and have a conversation".
If they try to snake out of that, delete them and move on. You should be able to meet with the guy within the same day of internet contact, within a hour or two.

The first meeting is only an interview, its not a date, so relax. Keep it casual. At least 25 percent of personal attraction is " Good Attitude".


some men won't bother to talk online for awhile only means they aren't for you.


This is just not true. I come from a generation , when I was your age, where we just met up some place and talked.
If Skippy wants to stay online and ask you a lot of question, and personal question, you are wasting time with him. To know someone , to know if there is any chemistry at all...you have to meet in person and have a conversation in person.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Looking for a relationship VS No Commitment
Posted: 6/5/2012 3:03:01 PM
I've noticed that a majority of the men in my area profiles read "Looking for a relationship" but in after chatting with them for a bit they seem to be more after a "Casual Dating/No Commitment".


Relationships typically begin with "Dating" [you don't need to say "Casual"]. An interest grows or it does not.

If upon talking to the man who said he wanted a relationship, changes his mind to "No commitment", this is usually because he doesn't want a relationship with you, ever, but he will have sex with you.

Why write one thing when you want another?
....Because a man doesn't know know he may meet a woman such has yourself. A woman he would gladly have sex with , but not commit .

And they say women are complicated lol.
...Men are extremely simple. Women [as yourself] try to make us more complicated because of your own gender psychology.


after chatting with them what they are looking for is more of a sexual encounter
.... okay, so sometimes a man just has to use whatever bait he believes may work to get some chick naked and laid.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Has this ever happened?
Posted: 6/5/2012 2:41:40 PM
you were not initially attracted to her but later on with time, perhaps something about her personality came through and won you over, so to speak.


"Attraction" doesn't go in reverse. "Attraction" is there, or it isn't. And when "Attraction" is not there, then "Attraction" never will be.

If this does happen to a man, the reason is because for some reason he can no longer attract the women he normally would be attracted to sexually, so he falls back on what may still be available to him. Basically this is a case of "Settling" for much less due to circumstances where he can no long compete for a mate.


Personally, methinks that men have a better chance of winning a woman over
....Same situation. The woman has determined she no longer has a chance of attracting the type of man she wants so she "Settles" for whomever is still available to her.
A good example of this would be she [when young] refusing certain bland guys for the more exciting charismatic guy. For what ever reason, those relationships don't work or she can no longer attract the charismatic male so now she makes the bland guy think he won over the girl. Of course now the girl has a few hundred thousand miles on her vagina and maybe some kids.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Gender Roles #2
Posted: 6/4/2012 11:10:20 PM
If my guy wants to do
If he doesn't mind that I do
he could certainly work with
If my guy wanted to take , do ,do
And I would hope that he would be
I've been single a long time. I've done everything myself,
and am very independent..
Being in a relationship would not change anything..
It would just be nice gestures if he were to want to
Life has changed.
.....oh goody goody. Barf.

I see no gender rules in my future,
....Just one. Don't have him hold your purse for you in public nor in private and he won't make you walk behind him.

I am Woman, after all.
.... thats retarded. You are A woman. You are human. So relax. Do you want to promote gender unity , as close at it possibly a can get , or do you want to promote the battle between the genders.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Opinions pleaseeeee
Posted: 6/4/2012 9:09:53 AM

I almost always have to text or contact him first!..Is this some sort of game
.....No its not a game. He probably didn't grow up with a dad to teach him anything. His mom probably raised him herself. Thereby firmly implanting a vagina in him. So he is lost when it comes to dating a woman. He probably thinks the woman is suppose to call all the shots.

Next time you see him, tell him to man the hell up. His mom made a little girl out of him. Unfortunately this has happened to a great many males in your generation. [He went shopping for 3 hours, ...that would drive most men to the brink of suicide]. He activated his inner vagina.
You've got your self a girlyman.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Creative Messages
Posted: 6/4/2012 3:23:04 AM

Do guys care about what kind of messages you receive from women?


I'm serious, the only message you need to tell a guy is: "Hi I want to meet you. Meet me in 2 hours at ...for about 30 minutes."

Thats it.
That is all you need to say to him. Why?

Because you're on a "Locating site" [aka: Dating Site]. You've filled out "Profiles". The basics are there. Everybody knows you want to meet up with a chick or a guy. If you're shy, get over it , or get off the site.

All he wants to know is 2 things:
1. Is he attracted to you
2. Do you look attractive [aka: hot, worth seeing naked].

That is all basically. Now you meet in person and see if there is any chemistry.


Do you want them to be creative or "Hey. How's it going?" works just as well for you?


No. ....Don't even have to say "Hey hows it going".... you're not long lost friends.
No... You don't need to be creative in your writing......
All you need to tell them, ""Hi I want to meet you. Meet me in 2 hours at ...for about 30 minutes."

Think "Prehistoric", "Basics", "Keep it simple".

Your profile has all the necessary data to make decision to meet you. Putting off meeting until later is only procrastination and wasting everyones time. Go away.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 10 (view)
 
How do I achieve the 1st date?
Posted: 6/3/2012 12:13:36 PM
Talk for a week or two, schedule our 1st meeting.


Thats the problem. Don't talk for week or two. Complete waste of time. Allow them a maximum of 5 days. If no meeting happens, dump them.

Within the first hour of contact [from finding them on the site] arrange a meeting in public.
Make sure you both understand the first meeting is only for 30 minutes , to one hour maximum. Think of it as "Speed meeting". This is all you have to do , to see
if there is any chemistry between you, making this worth further time spent.
No you don't need to swap phone numbers until after you have met.

Other than that, there is nothing broken.
The longer you put off meeting in person, then the longer there is no actual sensual contact, therefore making "Not ever meeting you" all that easier, because there is no neurological link to you formed from sensual contact [ie: you sitting across from them and talking]. So, no contact, then you just become another person on the internet, so forgetable.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 6 (view)
 
So a guy I met recently and he asked me to...
Posted: 6/3/2012 2:27:49 AM
Go with him to a game with his friends... Is this a date?


No.

A good way to tell if you're on a date: You feel comfortable enough with each other to be sexual with each other.

Or does he just want a new friend?
....Couldn't tell you what he wants. You will have to ask him.


but some of my guy friends were fearing friendzone
....Your prisoners in your friendzone were fearing friendzone? Thats too funny.
These are the guys who wanted to get you naked.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Gender Roles
Posted: 6/2/2012 10:49:48 PM

Hello Gentleman
... Don't say that if you're looking for a honest answer from a man. This isn't dress-up.

The only thing that is important about that question :
1. What role does your man accept and expect from you.
2. What role will you do.

Neckromancer, so you've consider transvestites, and transgenders? Maybe you should rethink that.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Is it ever to early to exchange phone numbers?
Posted: 6/2/2012 10:29:48 PM
I don't mind chatting for a bit on the computer but,
....What does that accomplish? Answer: Nothing.

I would rather chat on the phone.
....So would I, with someone I'VE MET.
When was the last time you called a number scratched onto a wall? Essentially that is what you're doing.

You are given the profile. All his necessary stats are there, to get started. So go meet him for about 30 minutes in public.

I think that guys think I'm a little pushy or may even be a little crazy because I say lets exchange numbers and chat on the phone.
....No , they would think you're just another time waster.

Many are very hesitant and it makes me think they have something to hide but,
....Why the fuk can't you just go meet them in person for 2o minutes?! He lives a few miles away, he can be at the cafe within the hour. Bring a friend and go meet him.

I'm not a guy and don't know how they think.
.....Well now you do. Get off your butt and go meet him.

What do you think?
.....I know you are just looking for other scared/shy people to agree with you.

Is it ever too early to exchange phone numbers?
....Yes. Before you've met in person,
its too freaking early. People don't know who the fuk they are talking to on the phone if they've never met you. So you Skype, whats that going to show you? oooo a moving picture and a voice. Skyping with someone you've never met is also another time waster. So bonehead can prolong that into never actually meeting you.

Stop wasting time. Just go go meet them and talk across a table and see how they are.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Isn't it better to be friends first?
Posted: 6/2/2012 4:08:37 PM
Isn't it better to be friends first?
....No.

Time and time again women have shown this to not work, by saying, "If we have sex, that will ruin the friendship".

This is because she is already getting attention and validation from a man, so knows she doesn't need to compromise her self on a more intimate level. She doesn't need to give him physical nor intimate attention. So there is no incentive for her to alter her behavior for his company.

If your friends first you know each other and are more comfortable around each other.
....Nope, doesn't work that way.
First determine "Attraction", then [maybe] become "Friends".

I mean I don't mind meeting new guys but I just assume they looking for one thing.
....Sure, sometimes we are only out to get laid. So keeping him around because he is looking for one thing is stupid. And sometimes dangerous.
Also, whether the encounter with the woman is short term or long term, this always begins with sexual attraction. If there is no sexual attraction, there is no point in approaching the woman. So his approaching the woman in the first place, would be highly unlikely.

So I guess my question is it easier for guys to date their girl "friends",
....."Easier"? No. We'll screw any chick we're attracted to sexually. However, this type of situation is shear hell for the chick, to give up herself physically, for him, when she already had him eating out of her hand.

Guys don't hang around women he is not in the least bit attracted to sexually. He wants to do you. Do him, or tell him to get lost.

If a woman says she'd like to be just friends,...that would be where I stop being polite. Now in the female equivalent, she is setting the guy up to be used.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Is physical attraction necessary right away?
Posted: 6/2/2012 2:47:30 AM

Is physical attraction necessary right away?
....Yes it is.
Extremely important.


To be honest, after the first date was over, I did not feel any attraction towards him.
....First meeting. If no attraction, then you walk away.


We kept talking after that, and I started to really like him and this lack of attraction become irrelevant.
....

Sure because that is what little girls do. They find a guy, they don't want to see him naked, but she knows he will give her attention and validate her existence. So she "Friendzones" him.


He told me that he finds me very attractive and so on.
....Sure, he wants to see you naked. Thats why wanted to meet you.


We did have lots of things in common. Suddenly, after third date he told me that he was attracted to me, but not romantically attracted.
....That means he just wants to have sex with you, but doesn't want any strings attached.


How can I guy go from hot to cold? From saying to my that I am beautiful, smart and what not only to not feeling romantically attracted to me?
....What the hell do you care. You're friendzoning him anyway.


Does that mean he was not attracted to me?
....No. It means his initial reason for asking you out held a hope that he may get infatuation fever, but he didn't. So he will settle with you just getting naked and riding him for fun.
But as far as you are concerned, you just want to put him in a white dress and call him Sally. So just walk away.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 9 (view)
 
should I keep writing
Posted: 6/1/2012 2:53:46 AM

should I keep writing


No. You contacted a guy, from his profile, because you read the profile and liked the profile display, so now you invite him to meet you in public. Give him a time and place , and meet for about 30 minutes.
Think of it as an introduction, an interview, a speeddating tactic. Ding, at 30 minutes, continue , or go away.


I contacted this guys who I thought was attractive, I told him I like his profile.
...."I like your profile" doesn't scream, "I want to meet you".


He writes back and said thank you - we had small talk and then I wrote asking a particular question and he responded with great interest - back and forth - small talk -
.....Don't do that anymore. You can do this face to face across a table.


but he has not initiated anything on his own. So - should I just let it go - -
....He is as naive about this crap as you are. Stop messing around. You find a guy you are attracted to, invite him to a meeting for 30 minutes in public.
Have your small talk there, and see where it goes.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Have you ever genuinely just wanted to be friends?
Posted: 5/31/2012 3:52:50 PM
Have you ever genuinely just wanted to be friends?
.....Sure, when I was seven.

so was just wondering if you guys ever GENUINELY just want friendship
...No. We have other males for GENUINELY wanted friendship. As for women, we mostly GENUINELY just want to get you naked sometimes. The other times you get us naked.

or is it's more a case of liking a girl and accepting she doesn't feel the same
....Sure but that duo won't be hanging out together. No point in doing that. Nothing is going to happen. The male with a low self esteem issue may try to play bestest girlfriends with her.

but just hanging around anyway on the off chance she changes her mind at some stage?
....No, if she wants to get railed or go penis diving she knows where the man lives and she can reach him when she is ready.

Oh and if you are genuinely friends with a girl do you think there's a chance she likes you?
...."Think there is a chance she likes you"? ...Are you in 3rd grade?
A straight guy hanging out with a woman pretending to be bestest girlfriends would harbor thoughts of doing some very nasty things to him. So he hopes there is a chance she will get hot for him. ...But its not going to happen. He has been "Friendzoned" and her remark to him would be, "I we have sex that will ruin our friendship".....which of course is a lie, ....she means to say, "If we have sex, then I can't get your attention and validation for free anymore".

It's such a silly old question but I really would like some fresh opinions anyway please!
....No, its a stupid question.
Women with "Straight Male friends", can do your own test; Go up to each one, place your wet lips up to his ear and tell him you want to have sex with him , while massaging his penis through his pants.
If you do this on married guys , they will just cry in front of you.

When any straight guy says his best friends are women, its because he never walked away when they told him, "I just want to be friends". Basically they never want to see him naked. She is just not attracted to him, so she makes him her honorary girlfriend with a penis.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 3 (view)
 
What should we women never say to a man
Posted: 5/31/2012 5:07:11 AM
What should we women never say to a man


You can say what ever you want to say.

Just know when to shut up , and know when to say nothing at all.

Don't ask for a "Gentleman" to answer your questions if you seek an honest answer. Ask a "Cave Man" [basically the heart of men].
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Is he scared?
Posted: 5/30/2012 10:14:29 PM

Is he scared?
....No , but you should be.


he has been through 2 marriages,
....Warning signal. Do not enter.


both where ex was cheating,
...People don't cheat without a reason. Warning signal. Do not enter.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Im a little confused about this guy im suppose to be friends with
Posted: 5/30/2012 10:05:42 PM

So i made this guy friend about two years ago
...Awww geez another stupid woman. The guy wanted to get you naked 2 years ago, but you decided to make him your Sally and friendzone him. That was 2 freaking years ago. You just wanted more validation , more attention, you just couldn't walk away from him , like you should have.

Get lost. Leave him to his women, the women who do actually want to see him intimately.

Your boyfriend was right for leaving. Just go away and find another guy.

You're confused because friendzoned Skippy when he was hot for you, but now Skippy has moved on.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 8 (view)
 
My ex says she loves what I am not me.
Posted: 5/29/2012 5:49:03 AM
My ex says she loves what I am not me.


Means she is turned on by the "Uniform" and what it stands for, but not you, as a person.

Women are attracted to 3 primary things about the male;
1. His income; Money
2. His Power; this can be Armed service, Fire, Police, Business power, Leader, Confidence.
3. His Fame; Who knows him, how he treats people around him , popularity.

Apparently you got your ex's attention due to your uniform. She got hot on that.


I'm a by the book military type I don't know how to be any other way than direct.


I hear you. When you're dealing with women you have to learn how to read "Indirect", or just tell her to shape up and say EXACTLY what is on her mind. In fact, I highly suggest you let your women know they NEED to speak EXACTLY whats on their mind. No more hinting nonsense.

Take some time off and stop looking for girlfriends and just date some different girls for awhile.


If a woman walked right up to you gave you a passionate kiss on the lips and said "I love you with all my heart!"
....Simple. If she and I have not been together more then 2 years, she is either infatuated or full of nonsense. Either way, take her to bed and fuk her brains out.


How am I supposed to think that is friendship or we have sex and be together all the time.
....
1. Forget about the "Together for all time nonsense". Don't get ahead of yourselves. .
2. If she won't let you take her to bed, kick her butt to the curb. She is wasting your time.
3. Just enjoy the sex. Don't worry about later.


I get told I'm invaluable and "I don't know what I'd do without you." Then change up and back to friend mode.
......Is she having sex with you? If yes, then don't worry about this. IF no, then screw that she thinks you're invaluable, dump her butt. If you don't dump her, she is going to place you in her friendzone with a penis tug, and thats all.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Letting him know w/o coming too strong?
Posted: 5/29/2012 5:32:44 AM

In other words, how does a girl make a move on a guy without coming off as desperate or pushing herself onto him?
.....Don't worry about that. I'm serious.
Women , if she is hot enough, can get away with looking desperate, its men who can not pull off the "Desperate" look.
The guy who says women should not be desperate looking, should be lynched. He is filling your head with a bunch of malarkey.

As I read it, there is no point in going out with him for a "Meeting" 3.
There has been no sexual interacton beyond a kiss and hug, so to me, these are just "Meetings", and 2 of them have been complete duds. Strike 2 , he is out, dump him.

When a guy is sexually interested in a woman, he is lets her know without any doubt.
You can go out with him a 3rd time, but I think it will be a waste of time.
Normally if you don't get any sexual interest from the person, man or woman, by the 3rd consecutive meeting, you dump them and move on.


how does a girl let a guy know that she wants to kiss him without coming on too strong?
....Don't worry about "Coming on too strong". If that makes him squeel like a little girl, get your things and walk away.
This is what you do; place your hand between his legs on his thigh, and lean in for a kiss. ...Or just unzip him and give him a juicy lip hug.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Am I overreacting?
Posted: 5/27/2012 2:01:00 PM
Jokes are not good for introductions.

Nobody knows the other person, so nobody knows what the other person would think is funny.
Interpretation of the joke can become confusing.

Contact Skippy and tell him you'll meet him for a half hour someplace, or just delete and move on.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Is a kiss really just a kiss?
Posted: 5/27/2012 3:49:41 AM

Is a kiss really just a kiss?


No.


Do you care at all about: Her style of kissing, breath, taste, etc?


Style: I'm not going to have a tizzy because she has her own style.
Breath: That can be fixed.
Taste: That could be an important issue.
Etc:....That could be an important issue, too.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 20 (view)
 
love to meet again vs. good night, my friend
Posted: 5/26/2012 2:31:58 PM
You're in the friendzone. Go find some other women. This time look between age 25 and 37.

Those tight long hugs better develop into foreplay within 3 consecutive meetings. If not, then dump her.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 19 (view)
 
is it possible for a man to go multi times?
Posted: 5/26/2012 2:22:12 PM
Yes , some men can do that.


I mean at this point, its work not fun.


Yes, I feel the same way if she wants foreplay, but it takes more than 10 minutes.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Is immediate physical attraction a necessity?
Posted: 5/25/2012 9:31:28 PM

I have recently had some wonderful communications and skype visits with a very nice man whom I would really like to know better but I felt I had to be honest with him about not feeling that physical "spark"


Yes, thats pretty stupid.

If you have not met in person, there isn't going to be any knowledge of chemistry , there or not. Don't waste the mans time yapping to him via email and skype. Meet him in person, then make a decision.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 7 (view)
 
View on relationships
Posted: 5/25/2012 9:19:20 PM
We dated for 8 months. I started thinking about breaking up with him around our 6 month mark.


Then you should have left him at the 6 month mark.

and only developed feeling for him as a good friend.


When women do that, women become selfish and suck up the attention from her new found girlfriend with a penis, meanwhile the guy loses out on his regular supply of poon.

Me: "Because we liked each other and I don't do well with long distance relationships."


No. You like him as a girlfriend. He held out hope for poon on a regular basis.

Me: "It was more convenient to break up that way. Plus I can enjoy his company for another 2 months."


You just wanted to suck up as much attention as possible..

Me: "Ummm but we had fun together for those extra 2 months and he agreed to it as well."


No. You had fun for 2 months playing best buddies. Complete waste of his time.

Me: "But we had fun..."
....No, you had fun. Meanwhile for two months you castrated him and moved him into your friendzone.
At 6 months you should have gotten your tail out of there.

Him: "Well that's not a relationship. That's a **** buddy!
.....Thats okay. As long as he was getting his regular hit of poon.

I told him I wasn't comfortable enough to and that my father is full of wisdom.
....Then you really should have never stayed with him, if you can't talk things out with your guy.

He told me that after 8 months, my ex deserves to hear about them and that I shouldn't be running to daddy. I told him that is something that should be earned not deserved.


After 6 months, really. And he is right.
If your guy hasn't earned this by 6 months , then you don't belong with him. You could have left him at 6 months, and should have.


^FWB are typically some what exclusive.. You both agree not sleep with other people for fairly clear cut reasons. You both hang out and enjoy each others company.


No you don't agree not to sleep with others. Friends "with Benefits", is a person you go to for sex when you're not involved. But if you do get involved with someone, you go back to being regular friends.
But you never make a promise to your FwB not to sleep with another.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 5 (view)
 
You're a camper, she's NOT! Gift ideas?
Posted: 5/25/2012 1:58:29 AM
A book on outdoor survival skills.
He will probably like it too.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 17 (view)
 
He wanted me to touch his face..?
Posted: 5/24/2012 1:47:31 PM

This was one of those dates where I did not feel instant chemistry/sparks


Then go away. Get lost stop wasting his time.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 18 (view)
 
How long do I expect it to last?
Posted: 5/24/2012 1:44:45 PM

do men (expecting a variety of answers) intend this to last forever or is it expected to fade away?


No idea. I suppose as long as there are mentally castrated men, this degrading action to men will last. Some castrated bonehead will continually intentionally walk up to the door and hold it open for women who are more than capable of opening her own door.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 17 (view)
 
How do I figure out my ex?
Posted: 5/23/2012 3:10:10 PM
Instead of hinting to men, just tell him exactly what you want him to know.

He wants to have sex with you again.

..Do you want that?

If yes, go see him.

If no, then tell him to go away and stop wasting your time playing girlfriends with you.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 19 (view)
 
how many of you guys...
Posted: 5/22/2012 11:48:13 PM
When she lives close by, I invite them to meet me in town, within my first email. Why? Because its goddamn dating site. To find and meet someone is the purpose of the site.


message a girl for the first time and in that message ask them to come hang out THAT night?


Nothing wrong with that. In fact thats a damn good idea. No wasting time. But next time:
Just tell him, "Instead of Hangout, I'll meet you for one hour and see how it goes".


I have had that happen a few times to me lately and wondering if it is common for that to happen.


Good. It is now.


I personally would not go and meet someone after only exchanging 4 or 5 messages.


Then you are wasting his time. This is a dating site. Your profile is selling you. Someone sees it, you go meet them.

Take a friend, and make sure the meeting is always in public, ...if possible, somewhere you are known by the regulars.
Not complicated. Buck up.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Why is it guys only want sex??
Posted: 5/22/2012 11:38:15 PM
Why is it guys only want sex??

We're guys. And you don't know if its "Only". If you're not sexually attracted to the guy,....get lost. Don't waste his time. Don't ask stupid questions about why guys like sex.

It seems like 99% of the men I meet from this site only want sex,
.... "Sex" is the motivator to going out with you. If your are not sexaully into him, then don't waste his time.

Has far as "Only want sex", you don't know that.

and I'd like to know why?
....If indeed he "Only" wants sex, its because you're a woman and it beats trying to catch a farm yard animal for sex.

I dont post super revealing pictures on my profile,
....You're a woman, and for some reason some guy got arroused when he came across your profile. Thats how it works, even off line. You're walking through the mall, some guy sees you, he is attracted to what he sees, he approaches and asks you out. Why? Because at some time soon, he wants to have sex with you.
I can make this more simple for you, but it would be crude.

and clearly state Im not here just for a hookup so why do I attract those kind of men?
....Means nothing.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 14 (view)
 
gung ho and backed off?
Posted: 5/22/2012 11:26:40 PM

Met a guy- talked to him for weeks before agreeing to a date -
....Then you never "Met" the guy, until you saw him in person, regardless of yapping with him for weeks.
So never meeting the guy, does not give you a good read into his personality. This is why anyone should meet within 5 days of internet contact.


He was gung ho
....Moving too fast is always a warning flag.


- gentleman, etc.
...Essentially this behavior is only hiding who he really is. So when a man pretends to be someone he really isn't [ie: the gentlemaan] , then he is hiding something.


Yes we have slept together.
...That doesn't mean anything. Its just sex. You were not forced. If you started making noises about being in a relationship because he has been inside your vagina, then that would push a man away.


We have a lot of in-depth conversations about relationships etc.
....I'm guessing after you let him in.


Guess he's just scared.
...If this went down as I think it did, then yes, you scared him by being overly possessive prematurely, and probably mentioning exclusivity after having sex.

He , and you, regardless of the sex, are not restricted to seeing only each other.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 18 (view)
 
The jerk blocked me!
Posted: 5/22/2012 11:21:15 PM

messaged me and we hit it off.
...People don't hit anything off from messaging.


Although I was a few years younger than him, we had a lot in common, and enjoyed each other.
...So far you have not said you've actually met him yet. So you are not enjoying each other. You're enjoying typing.


So he added me on facebook and we started to I.M. on there.
.....Stupid of him. He should never add you until he has met you.


After about five or six days, he asked if I wanted to hang out this weekend.
....Reasonable time enough to finally meet you.
Next time a guy offers you to hang out, and you have not met him yet, you say, "Lets meet for one hour and see where that will go".


So what my question is, what did I do wrong?


This is what you did wrong: Its been 6 days , but instead you told him that you were not comfortable with that, because I felt like we didn't know each other that well yet.

The only way to know someone is to meet them and look them in the eyes.


he had blocked me! On Plenty of Fish and Facebook!
....Good man. He didn't take any crap from you and did not allow you to waste his time.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Just curious, but how important is having a comfort level on a first meet?
Posted: 5/22/2012 6:11:46 AM
Just curious, but how important is having a comfort level on a first meet?


Makes the situation more comfortable. If you can't get comfortable with them within 20 minutes. Then you should call it a mess and go home.

I know it's great to feel comfortable around someone right off the bat, but obviously that doesn't mean that you'll be compatible.


Of course . Just as having sex a few minutes after meeting , or having sex with them for 2 years, ..doesn't mean you are compatible .

I was just wondering if being comfortable around someone right off has a bearing on whether you'd want to get to know them better or not.


No bearing.
Having discovered chemistry, mutual attractiveness, then yes, that is a good reason to get to know them better.
But if there is no sexual interest, then there is no need to waste time getting to know them .
Why?
Because generally the guy doesn't invite you, nor accepts your invitation , so he can talk politics with you.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 11 (view)
 
For the guys with confidence issues about looks
Posted: 5/22/2012 5:52:08 AM
If the guy has a face full of pimples , that will hurt his attractiveness.
If the guy has a face full of pimples , and has lots of money, power and fame. He will attract a woman and mate with her.

Its not that women are sexually attracted to prancing homoundead types, 1. He is an actor [Money, Fame], 2. He doesn't look undead and homo all the time. Thats his role in a movie.

To say a guy is shallow , or a girl is shallow, due to what they are attracted to, is only the insecure or reject whining about not getting the attention they think they should get for what they think they have on the inside.
What we determine to be shallow, about someone, is only their personal likes and dislikes. So not really shallow.

"Chauvinists have been pointing out for YEARS that women are attracted to power".

Women are attracted to power. Also ,attracted to men with great amounts of Money, and Fame. [The chauvinist is correct].
Doesn't matter if the woman also has money, power and fame, too, she is still attracted to the man who can accomplish these 3 categories, of coures along with her other criteria for mate-ablilty. But women are generally not going to get hot over the guy who can't meet her income. You won't see a female lawyer married to a guy who stocks vegetables in a store. But you will see a male lawyer married to a female vegetable stocker. Why? Because she is hot [to him].
Men are not sexually attracted to a woman's income, power or fame.

 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 13 (view)
 
When to give or ask for a phone number
Posted: 5/21/2012 6:02:33 PM

When to give or ask for a phone number


After you have met her in person, and you find there is some chemistry and mutual attraction.

Thats how this has always been done. You meet, you sense each other, you exchange contact information.

Really simple. Don't make this complicated.

Avoid texting with her. Talk to her. She needs to hear your voice. This builds a sensual attachment to you .
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 19 (view)
 
are girls scared of virgins?
Posted: 5/21/2012 5:57:24 PM
If you're still a virgin by age 22, go see a hooker. Tell her you need some pointers.
Hookers are just women who do this for business.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Can someone explain fishing to me?
Posted: 5/21/2012 5:31:49 PM
"Dating" [getting the woman before another guy gets her, and then get her naked is the ultimate goal] , so then "Dating" can be considered a sport .

How skillful you are at this , is reflected on your accomplishments, basically how many women a man has seduced.

I'm not fond of the term "Fishing" applied to the process of finding a good companion. I think some woman made it up. With "Fishing" you hook one, or net a lot, and pull them in. They die. They're dead. Life is over.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Do men think it's possible to find a woman who is a complete package?
Posted: 5/21/2012 5:22:47 PM

Do men think it's possible to find a woman who is a complete package?


Yes, but its tougher for those who are impatient or of low income status.
Men in the low to middle income range, tend to do a lot of "Settling" for second or third best. And because the guy settles, albeit tries to convince himself she is the one , when not really, the result is often a divorce or break up later.
But if the guy can look at his life and be happy with his life as it is, knowing he did his best, and this is it, then he may be able to choose a mate and be happy with her.


Do men think it's possible for a woman to truly be a "lady in public" if she's a "whore in the bedroom"?


She is who she is.
But as for the costume, "Lady", women often dawn this to hide intimate details of her self. As men dawn the costume of "Gentleman". These are costumes, not real people.
So a woman in the bedroom, we would rather she be a slut, not a whore. If she is acting like a whore in the bedroom you are going to need 50 dollars you can slip into her panties.


Do men think they have to forgo or sacrifice passion in their lives
....Stop. If you're forgoing or sacrificing passion for life, you've missed the boat. Life needs passion. The infatuated type and the in love type.


in order to settle down & marry a virtuous woman who's a suitable wife & mother of his children,
..If you do this, you will find yourself sneaking away and getting wild sex from the woman across the street.


because they don't think 1 woman can encompass both?
.,...Well thats stupid. A woman is who she is, regardless if she can birth some kids and mother them. She can tie you down and whip you at night, and take great care of her children.


Do men assume that if a woman is great in bed, she's a cheater not worthy of dating?


No, that too is just stupid.
We are all capable of cheating. Cheating occurs when there is a given reason and a given opportunity - thats a package deal to keep in mind.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Can I make up my own rules?
Posted: 5/20/2012 2:28:26 PM
Online "Dating" doesn't exist.
Online is only a device to locate more of those whom you could potentially date.
"Dating" is sexual, feeling comfortable with each other enough to be sexual and intimate.
"Meeting" is not a "Date". First meeting should only be for 30 minutes to at most 1 hour. This is the initial interview.
So now with that said, you CAN meet with lots of men, and sift through those you don't want much quicker.
Trust your instincts on first impressions.

Never give him any phone number until you are certain you want him to be phoning you or texting you. Saftey reasons is why dating sites [which really should be called "Locating sites"] give you site email to contact each other.

When going to meet someone for the first time, bring a friend and/or have the meeting always in a public venue, preferabley where someone knows you.

Allow only at most 3 meetings with each individual. If there is no evidence of workable chemistry , strike 3 , they are out. Drop them and move on. Of course they can be out after the first 10 minutes of meeting on the first Meeting, but 3 is the maximum you should allow anyone with whom you do not detect any workable sexual chemistry, but may not be sure. After 3 meetings and nothing , ..gone, drop and move on.

You get it? You can meet with as many guys you want , these are interviews, not dates. And from these meetings, you choose the one /or two, you think you get along with the best. ...And begin dating them.

While "Dating" , allow at least 4 to 6 months before you talk about going steady [exclusive]. In fact, if either of you has to mention "Exclusivity" before 4 months, then you're not ready for exclusivity.
"Exclusivity" is felt and feels natural. You become exclusive. You are not told to be exclusive.

And yes, guys will have to wait their turn sometimes. This is the processs of Locating on line and making a decision. Sometimes you will find that YOU have to wait your turn while HE meets some women and decides which woman he thinks would be best for him.

This "Meeting to Dating" , is a process. Talking to only one ,spending months with only one , is a complete waste of valuable life time. If they can't handle you are INTERVIEWING more than one man, they are not for you. Drop them. They are not patient. Consider taking notes in a note book after each meeting, jotting down what you think, pros and cons. But most of all, pay attention to your instincts of first meeting. In the first 10 minutes, you should be able to determine if you will ever want to see them naked and in your bed .

Again, these are not dates in the same day, these are meetings . Thirty minutes to one hour long. There is no needy and desperate associated to this. This is a process.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 13 (view)
 
A Female perspective on White Knight's?
Posted: 5/19/2012 11:35:09 PM
What do you girls think of "White Knight's", Basically blokes who message you with compliments constantly!


Girls intuitively have identified that guy as a wussy [1].
She now knows she has full control over his balls. For her, finding the "Wussy-guy', is like you finding a woman who will have sex with you at the snap of your fingers.

She leeches attention, food, gifts, rides, favors, etc , from that guy, but she will never get sexual with him.

[1]..A wussy is a guy who kisses up to women, a guy who feels that he needs to buy a woman's affection with gifts, dinners, compliments...because he can't imagine that a woman would want to be with him just for him.
In short, a wussy is a man, usually submissive or shy, who tries to compensate for his lack of ability to attract women by being overly accommodating and generous to women.

I however only say something if its true.
....Thats good, but if she really is complimentable, don't do it.
Why?
Because if she really is complimentable, she gets it all the time.
Your goal is to set your self off from the rest. By not mentioning anything about her looks, except for maybe how her nose might look crooked, is how she is going to be interested in you, and not them.
When you find these types of girls, don't lavish them, be friendly, but don't linger, go away.

Forget chivalry. Thats dead. Chivalry is ancient , and demeaning to you to use it, in this century.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Interested... ? Sexual Chemistry... ?
Posted: 5/19/2012 2:28:18 PM
Signs to be aware of when you are trying to find someone to date:
started the texting game, .....Too much texting not enough talking, not enough being together
gone out twice now, two weeks apart ....Not enough interest.
we've both been so busy,....Then you're not ready to pursue anything more important than Fkbuddy or booty call. -Which of course is fine. Being that you are both so busy.
but he texts me every 2-3 days......Means nothing.
our second date was a little unusual....You haven't had a date yet. You met him two weeks ago and you're meeting again. No sex, no other type of intimate contact feeling comfortable with each other on that level, then it is not a date.
but he was such a gentleman and came and waited for AAA with me and drove me home after. ...Means nothing.


I'm having a great time getting to know him.
...You've seen each other twice. This is not "Getting to know someone".


But we haven't had that awkward first kiss yet,
...So then you're not really dating yet.


and there doesn't seem to be a lot of sexual chemistry between us.
.....Dump him and move on.


Is that -chemistry- something that could still develop?
....No.
Sexual chemistry is there, or it is not there. Move on..


I'm assuming that he is interested.
..... 2 days in 2 weeks of just company, not actually dating... No he isn't interested.


Does this seem like more of a friend thing?
....Does to me , and seems a complete waste of time.

Fine if you're looking for girlfriend with a penis, but for anything else....forget it.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Why do some men move so fast?
Posted: 5/19/2012 4:43:17 AM

I came out of a 6 week relationship prior to joining POF that moved way too fast.
....Wasn't a relationship. Anything less than 4 to 6 months, is not a relationship, even though it may be sexual.
When you have an actual "Relationship" with someone, usually that means you know each other very well.


Well, I have yet another fast mover on my hands. He seems nice and genuine but keeps saying stuff that is too soon.


He isn't nice and genuine. Saying "Stuff" too soon, before meeting, or anything else, is a huge STOP sign. Dump and run.


We haven't even met b/c of scheduling and are slated to meet next weekend.


First meeting is only a "Meeting" and should not be any longer than 30 minutes to one hour. If they can't meet with you within 2 hours of initial contact, or at the latest, 5 days, then they are wasting your time. Only takes 10 to 20 minutes at the least, to meet. That should not be a scheduling problem. If it is , then they shouldn't be meeting you, they are going to be too busy, a lot.

Always have your first meetings in public, where someone knows you - would be good, or bring a friend.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Friends with boundaries NOT benefits?
Posted: 5/19/2012 3:59:59 AM

I have been single for 2yrs and I have 3 beautiful children.
...Beautiful to you. A shout to run , is what males get from that situation, from a woman your age.


While I am looking for something serious, I am also abstaining from sex- its been 1year 4months 16days-


You don't need to abstain from sex. There are about 13 different forms of birth control for women, plus condoms you can apply to the guy you do it with.


I just need to know if it is realistic to expect a guy to wait until I am ready again.
....No.

You make him wait...and wait.....and wait, then do it , chance are you will drop him inside of a month, or he will probably walk away inside of a month after doing you.
Even greater possibility: Men don't wait, he will always go find some woman who will put out.

You don't starve a man, and expect him to treat you special.


I don't believe in casual sex
.....Maybe you should , and believe in birth control.


so should I state this on my profile to discourage men with sex on the brain from messaging me?


If you're looking for dead men, sure. Males were born with sex on the brain. At 26 weeks old we get our first erections.
We know this thing is going to be used for something really fun, someday.


How soon should I bring this up after meeting someone?
.....You're taumatized by sex, we all understand that you are, but telling a guy you're abstaining and wait until I say "Give it to me big daddy", is not going to work.
He will either comply with your wishes, in which case you will dump him due to lack of respect because he actually let you make him wait, or he will be getting some wild strange down the road, or from your sister, or friends.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 13 (view)
 
When should I give out my number?
Posted: 5/18/2012 3:19:05 PM

When should I give out my number?
.....After you have met them in person. Never before you meet them.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Why all talk?
Posted: 5/17/2012 4:58:16 PM

he hasn't even asked to meet me and we been talking for 5 months almost everyday on phone.


1. He lives far away. ...Drop him , he is a waste of your time.

2. He lives close by.. Its been 5 months, you should have cut him loose 4 months 3 weeks and 2 days ago..
When a person is in the area you live, go meet them within 5 days or less.
Don't waste time with them.

Answer: Lose him. Say bye and go away.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 8 (view)
 
why do guys message me thinking i'll put out
Posted: 5/17/2012 4:45:22 PM

Why do guys only message me thinking I will put out.


Why else would they message you?! Guys ask you out. Why? Because the intention is to get laid, not to become your bestest bestest friend.


Is it somethin on my profile.
....Yes. A picture of a female, age 22.


Is it because I have a kid.
....For some guys that would be a huge red flag and they would not bother with you.
For other guys, this means she has made a mistake before , she will do it again, so she is probably easy.


I wanna make sure its not my fault.
....You were born with a vagina. You're going to attract men.


I'm young but ready to settle down.
....Thats fine, some women just consider themselves losers and will never amount to much of anything else, so nesting is always their option if they can attract a man.


I'm not into this ypkinky shit.
....You will be, with the right the guy.
 
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