online dating service
REGISTER | MAIL/PROFILE | HELP | NOW ONLINE | SEARCH | RATING | FORUMS | SUCCESS STORIES

 

     
Posted In Forum:
Home   login   MyForums  
Show ALL Forums  
 
 Author Thread: pee
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 10 (view)
 
pee
Posted: 11/22/2009 6:43:17 PM
I think I'd stop dating guys I meet at work.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Sex is sex and we no longer need to give or receive affection? What has happened to our age group?
Posted: 11/22/2009 5:10:43 PM
Perhaps that needs to be changed to *all normal human beings* need touch. Primates most certainly do, and there is a fairly sturdy block of work showing so. Baby monkeys will choose affection over food. Infants in Romanian orphanages died because of lack of touch. Aspergers is part of the autism spectrum, and I doubt that anyone wants to claim that as a model for normal. Certainly none of my friends who have autistic or Aspergers kids do.

Beyond that, I'm certain, as with everything else that is human, there is likely a broad range of need to give and need to receive touch, affection. I think it's good and well that we seek mates that match us, and who won't be using words like "needy" to describe a desire for touch and affection that simply exceeds theirs. . . .

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Finances and expenses - responsibility and commitment
Posted: 11/22/2009 11:46:01 AM
Thinking that message #28 was seeing that 90K + 50K = 140K ~~ so depending on what the two wish to, and/or are able to do with that. . . .

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Finances and expenses - responsibility and commitment
Posted: 11/21/2009 4:58:39 PM
I don't see a lot of problem here if the grown-ups are really honest and fair and wish to pull their own wagons. The scenario that appeals to me (as I would likely be the LI person), is that the LI rents their house to their child and classmates. Since their moving in with the HI is not likely to cause much of a financial drain (mortgage, taxes, insurance, heat, water are unlikely to be affected at all). LI and HI continue support of their own children and parents at whatever level it was previously. LI does contribute the cost of their own food. This is minimum skin off of HI's nose, maximum flexibility for LI, who's having to do all the actual physical and emotional work of moving, and changing their life.

This doesn't always happen, alas. I know of one joined family where the woman sold her house and moved her three daughters to a different state, took a job that paid less, and moved in with her (HI) hubby. He also had three daughters. In order not to upset *his* daughters, they each kept their own bedroom (although they were away at college) whereas the newcomer daughters were housed, together, in the rec room. . . . Needless to say, there was serious conflict, and the new marriage very nearly didn't make it.

I *have* been the HI person a time or two, and let my partner paddle their own canoe pretty much, though in one case, I'd feed his family the last week of the month when he ran out of $. That was *not* a live in situation though.

With love, a great many things are possible. With money, not that much.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 126 (view)
 
aging moustache
Posted: 11/21/2009 8:11:20 AM
I love moustaches...I think with goatees they show a man who has kept up on fashion sense.

LOL! I have to agree, though the *only* man I've ever loved who had a mustache & goatee ('cept my baby bro), has his *because* his step-dad had one, and he so loved the man, he adopted it, too. Given that he's in his sixties, his actually comes from the Colonel Sanders/KFC fashion period. . . .

Personally, I'm not fond of goatees, but love either a mustache or a full beard. At the same time, I figure if a guy loves, likes or is simply comfortable with whatever he's chosen, than all else being equal, I can go with that. Won't keep from agitating every now and again for more hair, though, lol!

Truth in advertising disclaimer: I *like* all male hair ~~ even backs and bums, so don't judge by *me*. . . .

But Jebus fellas, do NOT color it!!

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 78 (view)
 
The person you are interested in is already retired ... you are not.
Posted: 11/21/2009 7:27:48 AM
Perhaps it's like everything else between two people: depends on the people, lol! If either is rigid, and requires full time care, likely not to work. If both are able to entertain themselves, enjoy each other's company and have interests and goals which mesh, then likely it would work, eh?

The best situation of my life has been after I retired, but he had not. He was an actor, and absolutely *loved* what he did and had no intention of evah retiring. I need a good bit of alone time, so I got it, and was ready, willing and able to companion him when he arrived home. I'm also relatively flexible, so the ever changing schedule and krezzy work hours never flummoxed me. While a play was on, we often had dinner at one or two in the morning, talked till dawn, slept till noon, and had breakfast at three, lol! I'd pack him a lunch, and he'd leave for work at five or six. Between plays, schedule was more "normal," and during rehearsals, it could be either way, depending on how close to opening they were. Still, it worked very well -- *for us.*

So I think with love, and compatible personalities, sure, it can be a deal. A very good one indeed.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 177 (view)
 
“Every blade of grass has its angel that bends over it and whispers, 'Grow, grow.'”
Posted: 11/20/2009 5:05:22 PM
Hi, Manny! I think the ones we memorize have a huge effect on us: we let them change our brains or hearts or sumpin, lol!
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 175 (view)
 
“Every blade of grass has its angel that bends over it and whispers, 'Grow, grow.'”
Posted: 11/20/2009 12:50:05 PM
Eliot ~~ The Waste Land

When Lil's husband got demobbed, I said—
I didn't mince my words, I said to her myself, 140
HURRY UP PLEASE IT'S TIME
Now Albert's coming back, make yourself a bit smart.
He'll want to know what you done with that money he gave you
To get yourself some teeth. He did, I was there.
You have them all out, Lil, and get a nice set, 145
He said, I swear, I can't bear to look at you.
And no more can't I, I said, and think of poor Albert,
He's been in the army four years, he wants a good time,
And if you don't give it him, there's others will, I said.
Oh is there, she said. Something o' that, I said. 150
Then I'll know who to thank, she said, and give me a straight look.
HURRY UP PLEASE IT'S TIME
If you don't like it you can get on with it, I said.
Others can pick and choose if you can't.
But if Albert makes off, it won't be for lack of telling. 155
You ought to be ashamed, I said, to look so antique.
(And her only thirty-one.)
I can't help it, she said, pulling a long face,
It's them pills I took, to bring it off, she said.
(She's had five already, and nearly died of young George.) 160
The chemist said it would be alright, but I've never been the same.
You are a proper fool, I said.
Well, if Albert won't leave you alone, there it is, I said,
What you get married for if you don't want children?
HURRY UP PLEASE IT'S TIME 165
Well, that Sunday Albert was home, they had a hot gammon,
And they asked me in to dinner, to get the beauty of it hot—
HURRY UP PLEASE IT'S TIME
HURRY UP PLEASE IT'S TIME
Goonight Bill. Goonight Lou. Goonight May. Goonight. 170
Ta ta. Goonight. Goonight.
Good night, ladies, good night, sweet ladies, good night, good night.



.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 65 (view)
 
People, why against the rocking chair on the porch?
Posted: 11/20/2009 11:49:09 AM
I might sit there for an hour or two and end up doing chores in the dark

Indeed, lol!

Here's one I wrote a couple of years ago. . . .


Water gathering

most days I wait
through blue and sun
till dusk

or even later
and the rose has faded
to lavender, to gray

some days, the sleet
has started
and the leaves underfoot
are slick with ice

somehow I'm never sorry
and never learn

one night I waited
till the stars were out
dropped the bucket into
sound, only felt the weight
of it filling

and the night full of stars
and the river full of stars
and the bucket full of stars

come morning, the coffee
is also full of stars

jjl
7 January 2007
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 56 (view)
 
People, why against the rocking chair on the porch?
Posted: 11/20/2009 7:02:36 AM
Mo, you kin call me Wooby. Or Woobs if you want. I wasn't insulted, and I didn't feel put down. I'm afraid that's your interpretation.

Your fears are your fears. Your exaggeration to make a point, is yours. Own it, eh?

If I have offended you, I apologize.

Live long and prosper!
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 50 (view)
 
People, why against the rocking chair on the porch?
Posted: 11/20/2009 5:45:38 AM
who the hell wants to sit around waiting to die? well, obviously, lots of folks do.

Only those who seriously lack imagination could come to a conclusion like that. Definitely a twitchy opinion, lol! I have a seriously hyperactive son (hyperactive since before birth). He's very bright, but it's pretty much wasted since he's unable to sit still. He was born a few years before it was diagnosable. He's lived with it; and as an adult, refuses treatment. I doubt he has a clue as to the degree it's destroyed his life.

Mindless movement is *not* a path to more life; keeping still is at least one path to that.

Things one can do if not racing around the block to "prove" they aren't as old as they are: read, write, create (sculpt, paint), build things, great and small, comfort friends, make friends laugh, make love, learn to love, cook, make phone calls and do other political work.

I once lived next to a creek, with a giant pot of Russian Sage on my deck. There were seven hummingbirds that visited that pot of sage on a daily basis. Because I was able to sit very still, I came to know them very well -- the peaceful, the antsy, the funny, the irritable, the fun ones, the joyous ones, who was pissy, who a peacemaker. I got so I could identify the sound of their flight behind my head. When I told my guy about it, he was angry: howcum *I* could find out stuff like that, when *he* couldn't? So perhaps that need to keep things in motion is simply a sense of insecurity about not being *able* to be still with one's own soul. . . . .

Perhaps one day we can learn to be pleased with ourselves without having to put others down in the process?

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 39 (view)
 
People, why against the rocking chair on the porch?
Posted: 11/19/2009 11:21:20 PM
Breath ~~ story of my life, lol!

This is from a letter I wrote this past Sunday.


Also a letter from my sister Paula (who sends a group of us her letter to her missionary. Her youngest is now in the Missionary Training Center, scheduled to head out for Canada in a bit. When he gets back, no more weekly family letters, and I'll miss them. Though, Lord knows, reading what she and Scott do week in and week out, truly humbles me. I *never* had that kind of energy. And in fact, reading them, I often wonder *how* I got through my life at all, lol! She *easily* has ten times the "pep" that I was blessed with. I'm sure that is what my mother saw that led to my Basal Metabolism test at age 10 or so. And the brewers yeast, lol! Nasty stuff, that. Funny, I never realized till I was in my fifties how different the rest of the world was from me. And stopped beating myself up about "laziness" versus their "peppiness." That peppiness was NOT the equivalent of virtue. If this country has any vice, that's it: movement equals THE GOOD. Lack of it equals SLOTH and Sloth is a crime; unharnessed movement for no reason except to burn off energy, a virtue, lol! Being cold is a negative; sweating, a positive. Actually, I guess that goes back way before our founding, since lack of energy/pep is one of the seven deadly sins. . . . a character defect, if you will. Am mindful of "Teach us to sit still. . . ." *My* life has been about learning how to "fake" having energy. . . . Another word for peppy ~~ to me ~~ is twitchy.


I've worked next to the twitchy, and watch them get praise, while I was criticized for looking like I was doing nothing. In that case, luckily, we kept numbers, and my boss knew I was doing twice what the twitchy one was doing. . . . I have learned, too, to plan, and think, and do it well the first time because I don't have the energy to REdo, lol!

I'm through fighting it. If being able to run up and down mountains actually makes one more beautiful in God's eyes, so be it. I managed it at one time in my life, at great cost to myself. I'm no longer even willing to try.

If I sit very still, and make no sound, all the many animals that surround my space here will come. And it is good.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 60 (view)
 
Not such a sweet transvestite!
Posted: 11/19/2009 8:57:39 PM
My sense of the universe is this: transvestites are cross dressers; tranny's are trans-sexuals. Pre or post op. World of difference. This fella's an exhibitionist, and bi. Sounds like he's making her unhappy. Asking someone to change for you isn't going to work. She needs to kiss him good-bye, and mean it. Any other path means *mutual* insanity.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 92 (view)
 
Oh, its to soon to have sex... yah, blah, blah, blaw
Posted: 11/19/2009 8:44:51 PM
Poor Opie ~~ the world is jus' soooooooooooooo cruel, lol!

The trooth of the situation, is that for the right peeps, in the right time and place, *none* of this is a problem. It's this lovely and gorgeous dance that Ma Nature taught us in our genes. A few of us get totally out of kilter and need to practice being human before it's going to work for them. For the rest of us, we're doin' okay, thanks.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 208 (view)
 
Is dating during separation cheating?
Posted: 11/19/2009 7:46:39 PM
igor ~~ as far as I know, the word "cheating" is NOT a legal term. It is an emotional term.

Frankly, I don't give a rat's ass about the State's stake in this. (Though it may need to be considered.) At the point at which I have informed my SO (or vice versa, for that matter) that our relationship is over, it IS over. And dating ain't cheating. Nor is "intimate relations." For myself, and my own sanity, I will certainly wait till I'm well enough/healed enough to do either. But I'm never going to conflate what is legal with what is emotionally true.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 22 (view)
 
The first meeting
Posted: 11/19/2009 12:41:46 PM
Dood ~~ the first thing you do is dump this "friend." With friends like that you might just as well light yourself on fire *right now* and skip the preliminaries.

Take a look at your list of interests: if you saw a lady who was interested in kittens, crocheting, bingo, and yard saling, how interested would *you* be? Try and find a couple of things in your soul/personality that might appeal to a bit broader range of the human race.

Then smile, meet for coffee, and take it from there.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 109 (view)
 
Do large women like large men?
Posted: 11/19/2009 12:23:52 PM
Tuff ~~ I was exaggerating a bit, I'll admit. Humans, being, contain a universe of attitudes, thank Godde. For everyone who's fought the battle against weight gain, kudos. If all my fasts (water only) could be gathered together in one unbroken times span, I've spent several years of my life without eating at all. Pity is that this was at the advice of someone I loved and respected at lot (an Aunt).

True self love eventually comes not from looking in a mirror, but into one's soul. Nothing less will do. And when you finally come to love yourself, whatever the package looks like, only then are you able to love others.

Cheers!!
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 206 (view)
 
Is dating during separation cheating?
Posted: 11/19/2009 12:15:17 PM
Once one of the partnership has left, the relationship is *over.* You can't cheat on something that doesn't exist. Legally, indeed, there may be consequences, but emotionally the leavee needs to grow up, shake themselves out, and get on with their lives. It is, after all, the only one they have, and whining about being cheated on by someone who has declared in no uncertain terms that they don't love you, don't care about your feelings, and don't ever intend to spend time with you again is simply sad, sad, sad.

Carry on.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 107 (view)
 
Do large women like large men?
Posted: 11/19/2009 12:03:06 PM
I believe, rather, that it's thin, buff types who hate themselves: they work so hard to look good on the outside because they fear that what's on the inside will not draw nor hold anyone. My own experience with them is that they're right.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 403 (view)
 
One third of older women date younger men
Posted: 11/19/2009 11:22:18 AM
and the younger guy didn't even follow the custom of walking on the outside (street-side) of the woman.

And gosh, this is so important! With ladies elaborate silk skirts so much more difficult to clean than men's trousers. Carriage drivers are just SO inconsiderate.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Commitment, a unique or generalized pledge?
Posted: 11/19/2009 10:07:14 AM
"I'll stay with you until I no longer desire to. . . ." is hardly a pledge at all. "Till death do us part" is more than most of us are able, and perhaps more than is sane, depending on how awake and aware we are when making that pledge. If one has missed a major clue in the putting together of the match, it may even be a life-threatening one. Been there, have the scars.

The one I've settled on goes like this: I'll work hard, harder than you can imagine, to keep us together. I hope you will, and believe that you will, also.

If that's not good enough: so be it.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 82 (view)
 
Second (or Third or. . . ) Time Around
Posted: 11/18/2009 10:25:06 PM
RR ~ gotcha. That losing your mate/best friend dealie is a *tough* one. But I also think when you've *finally* got it right, you don't lose that "feel" of how it feels. . . . And won't settle for less, either. HugZ

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 56 (view)
 
How much do we tolerated before calling it quits ????
Posted: 11/18/2009 10:18:56 PM
Okay. On a strictly need to know basis: *which* is the "younger sex'? Men? Women? Help me out peeps, my head's about to explode, lol!

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 78 (view)
 
Who are Asians?.
Posted: 11/17/2009 2:13:07 AM
My second ex, after coming home from a road trip, asked me: Who the hell are "Asians."? I said: Chinese, Koreans, Japanese, Vietnamese, and sometimes Filipinos. He is Chinese. The answer made no sense to him. "But these countries and these people are not alike at all!" I said, I know, but they kinda look a bit alike. . . . And why did he want to know anyways? Because when the guys go out to a bar after work, these girls come up to me all the time and say: "I've always wanted an Asian baby. . . ."

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 403 (view)
 
Liberal vs conserative
Posted: 11/17/2009 12:02:38 AM
Gladstone's definition:
Liberalism is trust of the people tempered by prudence. Conservatism is distrust of the people tempered by fear.

Ambrose Bierce:
A Conservative is one who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal, who wishes to replace them with others.

G. K. Chesterton:
The whole modern world has divided itself into Conservatives and Progressives. The business of Progressives is to go on making mistakes. The business of the Conservatives is to prevent the mistakes from being corrected.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 398 (view)
 
Liberal vs conserative
Posted: 11/16/2009 10:33:34 PM

Wal-Mart Workers Pay Higher Premiums, On Average, Than Workers at Costco and Other Companies


According to the Center for a Changing Workforce, in 2003, Wal-Mart employees paid 41% of insurance premium costs. At the time of the report, Costco employees paid about 10% of premium costs. Nationally, workers today pay an average of 16% of premiums for single coverage and 26% of premiums for family coverage. [Employer Health Benefits 2005 Annual Survey, The Kaiser Family Foundation and Health Research and Educational Trust; Wal-Mart and Healthcare: Condition Critical, Center for a Changing Workforce, 10/26/05]


http://walmartwatch.com/pages/healthcare#studies

Wal-Mart = Conservative ownership
Costco = Liberal ownership

Byproduct = lots of Wal-Mart employees end up on state aid (check link above) which we, as taxpayers, pay for. Costco workers don't, so we don't.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 397 (view)
 
Liberal vs conserative
Posted: 11/16/2009 10:06:06 PM
I'll take heartless over shiftless, any day of the week.

I don't *know* any shif'less people. Or for that matter, any heartless ones. I *do* know some pretty self satisfied (generally very lucky) peeps. None of them are liberals.

Jus' me.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 55 (view)
 
How do you older women feel about a younger guy in a relationship
Posted: 11/16/2009 9:58:45 PM
I went back to grad school in my thirties ~~ nearly everyone I knew was 10 to 12 years younger than me. We were into the same music, books, comics, culture. We dated. It never seemed odd to me or to them. Still friends with many of them. When I met my second husband, he just seemed maybe five years younger than most of the men I'd dated. And he *was* lol! There wasn't going to be much "commonality" because his native language was different than mine, and his culture was different than mine. Both of which to be a *much* bigger problem than the 16 year age difference. Neither my 15 year old old son, nor my 17 year old were worried about his age. Nor were my friends, nor his friends. The main thing about him was that he was very bright, and very interesting. Still true.

In meat life, that ten year difference tends to hold vis a vis who's attracted to me. On line, because age is out and at the top of the profile, it's been much closer. Guys who "are interested in older women" have turned out, for the most part, to have bored me to death before the 4th email. The one I did meet, pretty much bored me to death over lunch. Now I just give 'em a verbal kiss and send 'em on their way. Interestingly, they are the one group who accepts rejection nicely. Usually with a thank you back, and "good luck" to you, too.

Dating someone of what ever age does NOT a cougar make. *HUNTING* does.

Live long and prosper!
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 72 (view)
 
Second (or Third or. . . ) Time Around
Posted: 11/16/2009 5:04:39 PM
Learning from successes? Well, I suppose it's doable. . . . But I think (have observed) that we are even *more* wrong in what we learn from success. . . . Example: I had my first child ~~ who was quiet, patient, immanently teachable and very amenable to reason. From that I "learned" that my beliefs and meths of child rearing were *right on*! Two and a half years later, same mom, same beliefs and methods, different kid: EPIC FAIL. I learned *infinitely* more from raising a kid with whom none of the standard stuff worked -- had to stretch myself into an entirely new pretzel of motherhood, lol! I've often said that if I'd only had the first one, I would have been absolutely insufferable! Number 2 made me enormously humble. . . .

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 240 (view)
 
Long vs short hair
Posted: 11/14/2009 10:48:00 PM
Hair


She asks me why...I'm just a hairy guy
I'm hairy noon and night; Hair that's a fright.
I'm hairy high and low,
Don't ask me why; don't know!
It's not for lack of bread
Like the Grateful Dead; darling

Gimme a head with hair, long beautiful hair
Shining, gleaming, steaming, flaxen, waxen
Give me down to there, hair!
Shoulder length, longer (hair!)
Here baby, there mama, Everywhere daddy daddy

CHORUS:
Hair! (hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair)
Flow it, Show it;
Long as God can grow it, My Hair!

Let it fly in the breeze and get caught in the trees
Give a home to the fleas in my hair
A home for fleas, a hive for bees
A nest for birds, there ain't no words
For the beauty, the splendor, the wonder of my

CHORUS

I want it long, straight, curly, fuzzy
Snaggy, shaggy, ratty, matty
Oily, greasy, fleecy, shining
Gleaming, steaming, flaxen, waxen
Knotted, polka-dotted; Twisted, beaded, braided
Powdered, flowered, and confettied
Bangled, tangled, spangled and spaghettied!

O-oh, Say can you see; my eyes if you can,
Then my hair's too short!
Down to here, down to there,
Down to where, down to there;
It stops by itself!
doo doo doo doo doot-doot doo doo doot

They'll be ga-ga at the go-go
when they see me in my toga
My toga made of blond, brilliantined, Biblical hair
My hair like Jesus wore it
Hallelujah I adore it
Hallelujah Mary loved her son
Why don't my Mother love me?
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Having a younger child
Posted: 11/14/2009 9:31:38 PM
I really really really think it depends, lol! I was seeing someone for a bit a couple of years ago, my age, but with a couple of teens. It was a bothersome/worrisome fact for me, and I kept trying to get around it. On the other hand, I've been involved with men where their children, even younger, had zero effect. And some that even enhanced the deal. . . (bright, funny, interesting. . . .)

I can see where *sometimes* it would make a big difference: my brother, handsome devil, was widowed with five boys, the youngest was five. Met/married a woman, gorgeous blonde, with one boy and four girls, the youngest was five. I don't think *either* of them ever expected to find another mate.

This is a very big pond, and all we (well most of us) are looking for is one. I'd say pretty good odds.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 109 (view)
 
Letting the walls down
Posted: 11/13/2009 11:03:05 PM
Classy ~~ read up on sociopaths. He sounds more and more like one.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 170 (view)
 
Did you think life would be like this at 50?
Posted: 11/13/2009 7:35:50 PM
The two women I "worshiped" in my ancestry were a great aunt who pulled a handcart across the plains, and a great grandmother who caught pneumonia chopping wood in the orchard in January at the age of 92, having out lived three husbands. I kinda jus' *knew* I'd gotten special genes, lol! I planned to live long, and have a fascinatin' life. . . .

I was 30 before the "don't trust anyone over 30" became the vogue saying of the day, so I didn't worry. When I turned 40, I was living in China, teaching at a University.

At fifty, I was happily married to a gorgeous fella I was madly in love with. At fifty-one, I was alone, and getting ready to file for divorce. . . . At fifty-four, I was living with a college sweetheart. At fifty-five, I was bizzy nailing my own house together.

At 64, I fell in love with an actor, and moved to NYC to be with him. At 66, I was "widowed" and came home to the wilds of West Virginia.

Told you that to tell you this: there is no way I, or any of the rest of us, could possibly have imagined what life would be like in the future. (Thank Godde!) It has simply been more wonderful, heartbreaking, and just plain interesting than I could have even begun to imagine at 10, 20, 30, or 40. . . . or 50. . . . .

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 83 (view)
 
I'm a 58 year old guy with young kids (Where is the POF/AARP/K-8 Forum?) Where do I fish?
Posted: 11/13/2009 4:05:08 PM
Well, lol!, I *did* walk into that when I was fifty-four. He had three kids, 12, 9, and 2. And half/week custody. Every week. He was also 11 years younger, and an old love. We lasted two months ~~ *turned out he was an alcoholic.* It was enormously harder to leave the kids than it was to leave their father.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1768 (view)
 
The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/13/2009 2:56:38 PM
When You Are Old

by William Butler Yeats


When you are old and grey and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;

How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;

And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 43 (view)
 
Possible for a man to love two women at once?
Posted: 11/13/2009 1:18:27 PM
Nota bene: there isn't any evidence that the OPie snooped (OR not). I've been in situations where I've simply *had* to "discover" what was put in my way. . . . And at least the *possibility* exists, until we hear otherwise, that the offending letters were dropped in her pathway.

I'm not sure of the reasons the "guilty" wish to be discovered, but I know of a case where a married guy in an affair used his daughter's computer to correspond with his paramour, and left the account open, and one of the letters on the screen by accident. . . . So much is possible here, to say the least, lol!

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Possible for a man to love two women at once?
Posted: 11/13/2009 8:10:10 AM
People, please paint with a smaller brush, lol! There are at *least* two sides in a separation. The one who leaves (for whatever reason) and the one who gets left against their will. The first is emotionally free likely months or years before the "fact" of leaving; the second is not, and will likely take months or years to heal. Been both places.

Our OPie has picked the wrong half. AND she's the transitional relationship. However, it has been a couple of months since the last letter: he *may* be healing. While *my* first impulse would be to put my boots on and get truckin' there may be a reason for her to take the time to talk to him before making a decision.

On the other hand, that fact that she's here, hoping for some good news, is a likely indication that she doesn't have it in her to confront him. That she's a hopin' for Glinda to show up with a solution. I truly wish her luck with this, because she seriously needs it.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 2096 (view)
 
Brizo's poems
Posted: 11/13/2009 6:57:29 AM
Ah! So nicely done, Mz Briz!! HugZ!!!
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 76 (view)
 
Living expenses and pride..
Posted: 11/12/2009 6:40:30 PM
Nope. Not pride. *False Pride*. . . . Real pride is know who you are, what your worth is, and expecting that worth to be respected. If it isn't, pride will make you do something about it. False Pride will "suck it up" ~~ and then complain.

I realize that the employment situation is pretty grim, and if one had to, one could work out an exchange and deficit (IOU) situation. With the right guy. But saying nothing rather implies that you're going to let it go, when in fact that isn't the case, is it?

Do yourself and him the favor of talking to him about how you feel rather than expecting him to mind read.

Good luck.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 122 (view)
 
The most important virtue over 60...for women and men.
Posted: 11/11/2009 7:43:46 PM
Don't know if it's a virtue or not, but the single most useful trait for me since I turned 60, is the ability to laugh. At myself first of all. At others, not so much. *With* others, always. Also much treasured in a mate. I 'spect it's going to be even more important next year. . . .

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 29 (view)
 
I'm a 58 year old guy with young kids (Where is the POF/AARP/K-8 Forum?) Where do I fish?
Posted: 11/11/2009 7:33:23 PM
Alternating *weeks* not weekends. Sounds like they have joint custody. Just a guess.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 9 (view)
 
I'm a 58 year old guy with young kids (Where is the POF/AARP/K-8 Forum?) Where do I fish?
Posted: 11/11/2009 5:19:40 PM
OPie, it'll help if you recognize that about 90% of the women here consider you *married* ~~ so your refusal of the *married* on your list looks really hypocritical, lol!

If you are actively soliciting among the young, it looks like: hell I hit the jackpot once, maybe I can do it again. . .

The way your profile reads is that you get lonely every other week, and are looking for an every other week relationship. Might want to be clearer about that.

I'd just keep truckin' -- it's likely that somewhere, somehow, you're going to appeal to someone. Give it some time.

And, Jebus, get divorced!!
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 49 (view)
 
Confront or Ignore
Posted: 11/11/2009 5:00:54 PM
http://www.ip2location.com/demo.aspx Got me about 180 miles and two states off. My own website tracker gets me from: Boston, Atlanta, Chicago, and sometimes San Francisco.

On the other hand, having dealt with a sociopath from here, I think I would pay attention to the things that don't mesh. . . . They lie so much they can't keep track of which lies they've told to which patsy.

Confrontation won't do any good: they'll just get pissed at you for "snooping," lol!

Good luck!

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 144 (view)
 
separated but still living together... to believe or not
Posted: 11/10/2009 7:55:48 PM
Life is about living and enjoying your ride, not about taking risks.

Must be that different strokes for different folks thang, yanno? I would have said that the *only* thing life was about is taking risks. . . . A baby who never takes a risk doesn't even learn how to walk. . . .

Jus' me. . . .

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 19 (view)
 
(M)anorexia? Who'd have thunk?
Posted: 11/10/2009 12:31:50 PM
I remember, early nineties, Naomi Wolf describing male anorexia.

Eating disorders include extreme attitudes, emotions and behaviors surrounding both food and weight issues. They include anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, and binge eating disorder. All are serious emotional and physical problems that can have devastating effects and life-threatening consequences. Eating disorders affect both men and women. While eating disorders are less common in men, approximately 10% of those suffering from eating disorders are male (Wolf, 1991). Studies also demonstrate that cultural and media pressures on men for the "ideal body" are the rise. This increased focus on body shape, size and physical appearance will likely contribute to increased numbers of eating disorder in males. Research indicates that eating disorders in males are clinically similar to eating disorders in females (Schneider & Argas, 1987).

Studies also demonstrate that certain athletic activities appear to put males at risk for developing eating disorders. Body builders, wrestlers, dancers, swimmers, runners, rowers, gymnasts and jockeys are prone to eating disorder due to the weigh restrictions necessitated by their sports (Andersen, Bartlett, Morgan & Rowena, 1995).

http://www.edreferral.com/males_eating_disorders.htm

I have a brother who got seriously ragged on by his buds in the 60's for his "belly" ~~ he fixed that: he now looks like a concentration camp survivor. And is "happy" about it.

I agree that it's sad, but like so many things, I don't think one gender *owns* it. Nor ever has.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 7 (view)
 
'The Prize Winner...'
Posted: 11/9/2009 11:13:07 PM
Wow. This almost be my sister, who has eleven kids, her degree in Child Psychology, and runs about four antique businesses. She started with yardsaling, and just kept moving up the ladder. She still yardsales, lol!

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Next Election and Obama
Posted: 11/9/2009 5:00:36 PM
Double ~~ I have to refresh after an edit to have it show up.

As for the gubmint mismanaging every thing, lol! SS is managed at 1% of the funds it manages. The alternative proposal put forth by the last administration, was going to have private investment funds do the same -- at a cost of 3 to 6%. . . . (and no damn guarantee that you wouldn't lose your shirt, say like, erm, last year?).

Rush's boy's need to hit the google circuit, as I see it: the information's out there.

Can't say the Homeland was run all that well ~~ but, well, that was a Republican dream, so. I remember advising my ex to invest in Lowe's after that terrific advice about plastic sheeting and duct tape. He didn't, but I was right: home remodeling stocks went up ::grin::

While the Republicans are rejoicing in the VA/NJ votes, those two states are running pretty much as they have for many many elections: opposite the President's party in the next off year election. More important, I think, is the fact that the Sarah Palin/Glenn Beck major effort in upstate NY-23, lost the Republican Party a seat it's virtually *owned* for 120 years, lol!

Fact is payrolls began to expand almost immediately on Obama's swearing in; but it's going to, fer shur, take a while for job creation to show up at the main street level.

All of that said, it's simply too early to be taking bets. . . . But if I *had* to, I'd bet on Obama. He's one amazing critter!

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Just wondering about this.....
Posted: 11/9/2009 11:32:54 AM
I think this, like much else having to do with drop down boxes may well need additional explanation. Some might well feel that they're answering: do you have kids at home? The ones who drink their daily glass of red wine for heart health may or may put down they drink more than three times a week. I think most 420 friendly folks aren't going to put down they do drugs. Nor are daily aspirin takers. . . Certainly the religion box couldn't begin to cover my spiritual orientation, lol!

So we can be thankful that the "body" of the profile to explain further. Take advantage of that, peeps: Markus has been generous there.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 72 (view)
 
Fort Hood shooting - What are the questions? What are the answers?
Posted: 11/7/2009 6:22:38 PM
New Century Foundation
From SourceWatch


The New Century Foundation, founded November 1990 and based in Oakton, Virginia, is a "self-styled think tank that publishes a monthly journal and a Web site called American Renaissance. Also hosts biannual conferences. The Foundation promotes pseudoscientific and questionably researched and argued studies to validate the superiority of whites."[1]

The Foundation is headed by Samuel Jared Taylor, "author of Paved With Good Intentions: The Failure of Race Relations in Contemporary America, a 1991 book that documented fundamental problems with U.S. policies on civil rights, crime and welfare. ... But Mr. Taylor was criticized as an advocate of 'the new white racism' by conservative author Dinesh D'Souza, whose 1995 book The End of Racism reported many of the same racial problems Mr. Taylor had examined in his earlier book."[2]
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 71 (view)
 
Fort Hood shooting - What are the questions? What are the answers?
Posted: 11/7/2009 6:08:13 PM
the exact LAST thing he should have done was join the United States Army. With Afghanistan and Iraq being the major two theatres of armed conflict for the US, his chances of being sent to either one would have been a sure bet one would think.

Today. He joined twenty years ago -- which would make it 1989.

 
Show ALL Forums