First date- and he ogles the 22 yr old waitress all night chat & forums.

online dating service

REGISTER | MAIL/PROFILE | HELP | NOW ONLINE | SEARCH | RATING | FORUMS | SUCCESS STORIES

Posted In Forum:

Home

login

Show ALL Forums

Author

Thread: First date- and he ogles the 22 yr old waitress all night

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 136 (view)

First date- and he ogles the 22 yr old waitress all night Posted: 12/16/2007 11:53:46 AM
You must have been out with my former significant other! LOL For whatever reason he thought that young women would find HIM as attractive as he found them! And they didn't. All he did was make them nervous. And no, he wasn't like that when we first started seeing each other. Or he just didn't show his true colors for a while. Regardless, consider yourself lucky that you got to see that side of him before you had invested a lot of time with him. Actually the first time I ever noticed the SO ogling someone it was my son's GIRLFRIEND. He made her so nervous that she got to the point that she wouldn't even come to the house with my son if she knew that pervy perveson was going to be around. Obviously our relationship didn't last :)

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 16 (view)

Men are getting confusing. Posted: 3/3/2007 3:49:09 PM
Ummmm...not confusing at all. Some (not ALL) who have LTR as what they're looking for have it there because they think that's what the women on the site are looking for. In fact, I've seen some who update their profile on a regular basis to change what they're looking for. And I'm guessing this is because someone they want to e-mail has their mail filtered for anything other than LTR. LTR can mean anything -- in fact it can mean a long-term sex-only relationship. And that's exactly what some of them are looking for. Of course, there's also the "grass may be greener" syndrome involved too. Some people are always looking for their next conquest. And before I get flamed -- I said SOME, not all. I know that there are some very sincere guys on here. The ones who are just trolling for a fish are making the job much tougher for the ones who are sincerely looking for a LTR.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 6 (view)

have pcs taken the fun out of it? Posted: 2/20/2007 9:27:00 AM
Of course PCs have taken the "fun" out of it. As someone else already mentioned, would anyone in their right mind walk up to a complete stranger on the street and say, "wow, you have great t*ts" or would you ask a complete stranger to join you in web camming? PCs and the internet are great; however, they've also brought a new all-time low in communicating with people. Once in a while you find someone who is truly interested in knowing the PERSON; but that hasn't been my "usual" experience with online dating sites -- this or any other. The difference with this one and some of the others is that I didn't have to pay to be insulted. That said, a friend and I were just talking about this the other night. We all figured out that meeting someone in a bar/pub/dancing is ALL about physical attraction right from the beginning. So that's probably not the best alternative either. As far as WHY he was staring -- depends on whether you were wearing what you were wearing in some of your pictures. Why would a reasonably attractive young woman degrade herself by posting half-naked pictures on the internet? So you have cleavage and nice legs, let the person who meets you find that out for himself. A little mystery is good.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 992 (view)

A Few Extra Pounds Posted: 2/5/2007 7:23:40 PM
Not only is it dishonest, but if you're going to lie about your weight, what else are you lying about? Amen! And that's I usually tell someone I meet who is a) 10 years older than their picture or what's stated in their profile b) weighs 50 pounds more and has listed himself as "about average" or a "few extra pounds" c) has a full head of hair in his profile; but is bald in person. These are the basics. If you're lying about those, what else are you lying about or WILL you lie about later?? And, no, I'm not overweight and I'm not bugly -- I just prefer not to have a picture posted on the internet :)

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 52 (view)

Bi Polar, how do I tell him? Posted: 2/3/2007 2:22:04 PM
It's much better to be honest with him right up front. And at least you know and recognize that you have a problem. Try living with someone who I (and my friends) KNEW was bipolar; however, HE didn't know it and refused to accept that there might be a problem and therefore refused to seek any help for the problem. It was like living with two entirely different people -- a great guy when he was happy and an absolute disaster when he was in one of his paranoid, non-trusting, the world is out to get me moods. I noticed the "signs" early in the relationship; however, I chose to ignore some of them (and that was MY bad). I didn't really learn for sure what was going on until his SON told me about it. He also told me that it was the reason his parents' marriage broke up after 20 years AND the reason his relationship with his father was such a disaster. It was definitely the demise of our relationship. He got into another relationship very quickly after ours ended and, from what I hear, his new love interest is going through the same thing. Hopefully he will become the wise person you are and eventually seek help for his problem.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 15 (view)

Guys,When do you stop a date? Posted: 2/3/2007 2:08:09 PM
First meetings should be somewhere for a quick drink or coffee. My experience has been that two people usually know whether there's any "spark" after about 10-15 minutes. Why put yourself through the ordeal of a long, drawn-out dinner date when you KNOW that there's a great chance that you're never going to see this person again? That said, there have been at least 2 occasions where I knew as soon as I laid eyes on the person that we were not a match. In those cases, I even paid for my own coffee. Coffee's cheap! Ladies! Don't scam these guys for free meals if you know there's nothing there. You make the rest of us looks bad :)

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 110 (view)

Males disapproving of women having male friends Posted: 2/2/2007 12:01:18 PM
but it's not really friendship You can only speak for YOURSELF in that respect. For me? I have lots of male friends and that's all they are -- friends. Some of them I've been friends with for YEARS. We've seen each other through good times and bad times and we've been there for each other. We've seen each other through relationships, break-ups, births, deaths, children's marriages -- the same things I've been through with my female friends. In fact, some of my best friends are male -- gay AND straight. As you get older, your opinion on "male friends" may change somewhat. Sometimes it's great to just have a male friend with whom you can go out to dinner or dancing or a concert or spend a day hanging out at the beach with and not have to worry about the pressure of "dating" them or constantly trying to impress them. These are the guys who have seen you at your worst and still like you -- just because you're YOU. No hidden agendas. One thing that I've found as I've gotten older is that I do appreciate a man's perspective on things. There are some crappy men out there -- there are also some crappy women out there. But there are also some GREAT men out there. You just have to take the time to get to know them as something other than a "potential love interest". And some of the people I've dated have turned out to be nothing more than friends. We realized early on that, although we enjoyed each other's company, there was no future in "us". And no, they're not friends with benefits -- that only complicates things beyond belief (and that thread's been done to death here too LOL). I would take 1 true friend over 10 potential love interests any day. Obviously the best of both worlds would be to be married to your best friend; but that doesn't always happen. Anyone who would expect me to give up ANY of my friends (male or female) would be asking something that I'm not willing to do. Love interests may come and go; but real friends stay around forever (and help you hide the bodies )

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 57 (view)

Am I being played???? Posted: 2/2/2007 11:48:32 AM
The old saying, "If it sounds too good to be true" applies in relationships as well as other things in life. Move on. If he's really interested, he'll be interested and will contact you. If not, he'll be gone and it will be HIS loss and not yours. You'll be fine. This will definitely not be the last time that your heart is broken in this lifetime and you WILL survive. I promise you that. Eventually you'll meet someone who is right for you and this guy will become nothing more than a memory (hopefully a pleasant one).

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 331 (view)

Girlfriend Wants Plenty of Fish Password! Posted: 2/1/2007 3:54:38 PM
Kelli do you know how to change passwords??? on our pof account??? if you do find me kellita... on pof and message me as to how. Login to Plentyoffish.com and click on ‘Edit Profile’ at the top of the screen. Next, click on ‘Edit More Registration Detail HERE’ and you’ll be able to change your username and password. Click HERE to change your username or password. It's in the Help section at the top of the page

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 28 (view)

Here's what's really going on here! Posted: 2/1/2007 3:50:23 PM
^^^^What she said! Baggage has nothing to do with divorce or children.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 25 (view)

when was this site started?? Guy I see may be cheating... Posted: 1/31/2007 7:15:09 AM
But...wait. You've been seeing him for "almost 3 years" and you joined this site on 2/26/2006? Am I missing something? Did you start "checking" on him a year ago and are just now asking this question? Or were you on the site looking around yourself? I'm confused.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 91 (view)

What do you do when someone better comes along? Posted: 1/28/2007 5:53:37 PM
The grass is greener scenario..The price you pay for juggling more than one woman. I fail to understand why , when you've met someone that you click with and want to get to know, that a man or woman still keeps seeking that greener grass...Perhaps this is why so many people are miserable, alone and always breaking up and hurting one another..Despite popular opinion, it's not about hurting people and when you can't even committ to talking to a woman that had your interest and peeked your curiosity, then it's not saying alot about your ability to remain faithful if you meet the greener grass lady .. AMEN! I think this is called "failure to commit". There's probably ALWAYS going to be the possibility of someone else coming along. OR, this is just a person who isn't really interested in anything more than online relationships in the first place.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 2 (view)

When pictures in the profile look nothing like the person in person. Posted: 1/28/2007 4:14:54 PM
Oh yeah...been there, done that! And, yes, I also feel compelled to ask whether the picture is recent or not. Typically, if they get "overly offended" that I would ask such a question, it's a sure sign that the picture is NOT a recent one. I don't have a picture posted for very personal reasons -- not because I'm unattractive. And I will communicate with others who don't have a picture posted. If/when I think the time might be right (after we've gotten to know each other a little better) I'll provide a recent photo if they will. And sometimes even THAT doesn't work. When it doesn't, I'm also no longer "afraid" to mention that they look totally different than their picture AND that I see that as a form of lying and deception and we are therefore probably not a match at all. I would ALSO love to hear from people who have 10-year-old pictures posted or pictures of them when they were 50-100 pounds lighter. There must be some logical explanation of it -- although I really can't think of one!

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

The dreaded change or delete profile dilema.. Posted: 1/28/2007 3:49:28 PM
It's obvious that you already know the answer to this one so I won't tell you It's the old "there might be something better out there" thing.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 38 (view)

RED Flag or not??? Posted: 1/28/2007 3:44:50 PM
ot- did you ever stop to consider that he probably is reading this post? so when he does, he will either correct his mistake or move on to an easier target. either way, problem solved Truer words were never spoken -- except there is a third option. He may just stop checking this site and go to another one. Maybe he's exhausted all potentials on this site? I'm interested in what the term "gentleman" means sometimes. And for that matter what a "LADY" is. I often see "gentleman looking for lady" mentioned in profiles; but I'm never sure what either means -- especially after talking to some of the "gentlemen". Definitely a red flag --

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 1316 (view)

Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all? Posted: 1/28/2007 3:22:30 PM
I would rather have no pic than a pic that's 10 years old! Men (and women) -- Are you dumb enough to think that we aren't going to be able to recognize that the picture was not made recently? Or their profile says they're 60 years old; but the picture in their profile shows them in their basic training uniform from the military or a high school prom dress?? Will we not be able to recognize that their weight is double what it was when the pic was made? I read (and hear) so often from guys how disappointed they are that women post pictures that were made years before. It goes both ways. For me, it's not all about looks (although I agree that looks are important). It's more about the fact that it's a form of lying or deception and that's a huge red flag right from the beginning. My first thought is always, "If you're not honest about something as basic as your looks, what else will you lie about?" That said (and before I get blasted ) I have no picture posted for very personal reasons (no I'm not married and I'm not involved with anyone and I'm not looking for extracurricular activities and I don't have outstanding warrants). Once I've talked with someone for a while and get to know them a little better, I'm always happy to send a picture -- and it will be a tasteful and RECENT picture. I have very few people on this site show any interest at all since I don't have a pic posted and that's okay. I mainly come here for the forums anyway as I find some of them quite enlightening. I think there may be some great opportunities on here with people who have no pics posted -- but people have to be willing to take that chance. Just like anything else in life sometimes taking a chance works and sometimes it doesn't.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 28 (view)

Is it healthy for me to be here? Posted: 1/28/2007 3:03:04 PM
Here are some instances where I think it may be a problem: It's the ONLY place you find people you're interested in You find yourself running to the computer as soon as you get home in the evening You're involved with someone and find that you still can't give up the possibility that there might be something better out there so you're constantly on here You meet someone from here, go out with them, go home and immediately come here to see if there's someone else better You find yourself embellishing yourself or being untruthful about who you are and what you're looking for If you prefer to say in and sit in front of the computer instead of getting out an enjoying the "real world" If none of those are an issue for you, you're probably okay. Sometimes it's just fun to see what other people have to say about certain subjects. A friend of mine authored one of the first books about the internet. One of my favorite lines from the book was "There are no dogs on the internet". Translated, you can be anything you want to be while you're here -- whether it's the truth or not.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 10 (view)

yes why dont men say they love you Posted: 1/28/2007 2:53:58 PM
Us men do assume (rightly or wrongly) that a woman knows we love them Believe it or not, women are not mind readers any more than men are One of my favorite songs ends with the words, "He never said I Love You. Guess he thought I knew." And this wasn't about a lover, significant other, etc. It was about her father. Think about it -- how often do you tell your children (especially after they're older) that you love them? I tell people "I love you" all the time -- friends, relatives, family members. But that's just me. To me there's a big difference in saying those words and saying "I'm in love WITH you". That has a whole different level of commitment in my opinion. I am very sparing with those words with someone I'm in love WITH until I'm sure. I also believe that "I Love You" is sometimes the most OVER-USED phrase in the English language and sometimes for the wrong reasons -- especially if you're saying it simply because that's what you THINK someone wants to hear. If you truly are in love with someone, let them know and don't be hesitant to say "I Love You" after that. You never know how long they're going to be around to hear those words.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 32 (view)

Cut the BS Posted: 1/11/2007 6:49:49 PM
Because most of them only THINK they want a relationship. I know that there are people on this site (and others) who have multiple profiles. One says one thing they're looking for, another says yet another. It's pretty easy to find multiple profiles under different names -- just do a search. People seldom change their LOCATION. Just their screen names and what they're looking for. Ever wonder why? Because they find someone they THINK they're interested in, notice that they won't accept e-mail from someone looking for anything other than long-term so they make up a new profile saying they're looking for long-term LOL. And that's just the online part of it. So let's say you DO find someone and you develop a relationship. It's just like anything else in life -- it may take a little bit of work and most of us are just to lazy to invest the time. We hope the other person will do whatever it takes to keep the relationship interesting. When they don't, BOOM, we decide that the relationship is failing. Relationships take TWO people to keep it interesting and alive. And yes it does take TIME -- relationships don't happen overnight (in most cases). And it takes CARING about the relationship. So, to the OP, sounds like you've finally figured it out. Now whatcha gonna do about it?

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 19 (view)

How to play it? Posted: 1/11/2007 6:19:08 PM
You sure you aren't a friend of mine? LOL A good male friend just talked to me about something very similar the other night -- to get a "female perspective" on what was going on. I'll tell you the same thing I told him. Sounds like this person is playing YOU. She probably knows that she's "got you", is probably still interested, may even care more about you than she's willing to admit. However, she's not ready to settle down with one person. She's into the dating thing right now; but wants to be sure that you're waiting in the wings in case things don't work out with someone/something else. And, in my opinion, no one should ever just sit around waiting for someone to come to their senses -- life is too short. Don't compromise YOURSELF. I agree that drinking too much is a major turn-off (at least to me); but did she know that when she started going out with you? Or did she just see it over time? Did your drinking come as a surprise to her? Did she join you in your little drinking escapades? If you quit drinking (and/or smoking), it has to be for YOU...not because someone else wants you to do it. If you do it for HER, you'll probably come to resent her for it -- especially if the two of you get back together -- and the first time you two have a disagreement you'll get drunk and buy a pack of cigarettes LOL. Once you've got your act together, THEN contact her if you want to. This game playing thing won't work though -- for either of you. It may be time to just cut your losses and move on to another fish Good luck to you whatever you choose to do.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 3 (view)

Being a member Posted: 1/6/2007 8:41:39 AM
Absolutely meet ASAP. Research has shown that the longer you e-mail, IM and chat on the phone the more likely it is that one or more of you will be disappointed when you finally meet face-to-face. Might as well get the disappointment out of the way quickly. Wish someone would have told me THAT in the beginning!

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 7 (view)

SEX AND WOMEN OVER 40 OR 50????? Posted: 1/2/2007 6:48:42 PM
To OP -- no you don't need to search for younger women. You need to search for women who appreciate a healthy sex life. The lady who wrote you is correct in some sense (about the hormonal thing); but not entirely. There ARE often sexual problems associated with menopause; but they can be short-term. In addition, it helps if she has an understanding partner who is willing to give her a little time to adjust to the problems. A lot of the problem can be alleviated with non-medicinal methods. And I won't go into any more detail than that. I will tell you that I'm post-menopausal and I have absolutely NO problem with sex. And I'm not INTERESTED in younger men because I appreciate a man who knows what he's doing.

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 446 (view)

yes or no? Friends with benefits! Posted: 1/2/2007 6:40:54 PM
Tried it. Can you say MAJOR complications?

Joined: 12/29/2006

Msg: 21 (view)

is she scarred or leading you on??? This is for you ladies Posted: 1/2/2007 6:37:58 PM
How about just asking her?

Show ALL Forums