Why do I usually attract men that I'm not attracted to? Annoying! chat & forums.

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1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Why do I usually attract men that I'm not attracted to? Annoying! Posted: 8/27/2009 8:48:31 PM
This annoys me so much! I usually get hit on by guys that I'm either not really attracted to, or just not my type. Not that I'm really looking for a boyfriend or anything but it would be nice to find a guy that approaches me that I like for once. I'm not superficial at all. I could care less about getting the hottest guy. It would just be nice to attract a man that I find attractive,appealing and we both vibe. It's flattering to get hit on but it makes me feel like I'm going to be single forever. I normally attract geeky men, nothing wrong with these type of men but they're just not my type. What do I have to do to get attention from a guy I like? Why do I seem to attract men that I personally feel that are not on my level? I think I'm an attractive girl so what is it?

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

How do you stop missing your ex because it's so hard... Posted: 6/5/2009 9:24:02 AM
He was my best friend and we did everything together. It's been a month since we broke up but I have to move on because he has. I'm really feeling depressed and lonely without him and that's what makes it so hard. I miss the way we hung out all the time.. I miss the late night phonecalls I miss the deep conversations that only we had.. I miss kissing and being held... Now I just don't have anybody. I have friends but it's not the same. I'm feeling depressed about him not being in my life anymore. How do you move on because it's hard.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Dealing with the loneliness and anxiety of a breakup... Posted: 4/3/2009 8:40:53 PM
I've come to terms that my ex of 2 years doesn't want me anymore.My ex broke up with me and said he wanted to be friends but I told him I couldn't do that because it hurts too much. I've stopped contact after a couple of days. I believe he found someone else because I happened to see him having a conversation with some chick on his myspace page in his comments. I can see the comments they address to each other.. hey babe,hey boo all through the comments and that hurted like hell! So I deleted his number and everything that reminds me of him. It's left me alone and a little depressed. Sad to say it, but I didn't have much of a life without my ex. He was my best friend & the only person I felt truly understood me. Yeah I have work & I have school.. seems like a pretty boring life ahead of me. I'm sitting here on the computer doing a project but yet has my ex in my head so much that I can't even concentrate on what I'm supposed to be doing. I've never really dated much and I'm only 22. I've had only 2 serious relationships.. One when I was in high school and one recently with this guy. I feel like I won't find anyone else and that scares me. I feel like I'll be a bitter lonely old lady with nothing. I have friends but most of them are busy with their own lives. I may hang with them maybe twice a month when all of our schedules are free. So now I'm trying to get over the anxiety and this lonely feeling that has come over me. I feel butterflies in my stomach and I'm hurt... How did you deal with someone leaving you??

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 51 (view)

How do you get over someone who doesn't want you?? Posted: 4/3/2009 8:01:58 AM
I've actually started no contact 4 days ago. It's easy because he hasn't called me anyway... Him just feel hurt but I guess I will be fine in time...

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 14 (view)

How do you get over someone who doesn't want you?? Posted: 3/28/2009 1:59:28 PM
Moving on is the hard part.. It's so hard to let go.. I've tried to erase his number and various things only to find myself chickening out and stopping myself from doing it.. This sucks..

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 10 (view)

How do you get over someone who doesn't want you?? Posted: 3/28/2009 1:54:17 PM
His excuse was that he was too busy with his life at the moment to continue a relationship and he felt we drifted apart as well. For some reason, I don't believe that but whatever.. This going to be hard to just let go of a 2 year relationship. I don't even remember how my life was like without him, this is seriously going to be hard for me..

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 6 (view)

How do you get over someone who doesn't want you?? Posted: 3/28/2009 1:41:26 PM
I'm annoyed in a sense because he came at me so strongly telling me he liked me etc etc . Now that I got interested, he decided he wants to be friends & he's distant. I'm really P'Oed by that because it's hard letting go... This was the first guy I liked in a REALLY long time.. Seemed like he was just after something..

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

How do you get over someone who doesn't want you?? Posted: 3/28/2009 1:32:28 PM
I was seeing this guy for awhile only to find out he wasn't into me as much I was into him. However he did say he enjoys our conversations and that he would like us to remain friends. I wouldn't mind continuing a friendship. However, I'm upset because at first he was into me. I don't know what changed, he called all the time. Wanting to get to know me more, wanting to hang out a lot etc etc. He was funny,charming and I was really falling for him.Then all of a sudden he changed. He got cold and distant.I call him and we always talk, he doesn't seem like he's avoiding me, he calls but it's not as frequent as before. To be honest, I'm trying this friendship thing out in hopes of him coming around and changing his mind but I just doubt it. Should I just end things with him altogether?

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 12 (view)

Boyfriend seems too tired or busy for me anymore... Posted: 3/19/2009 4:22:55 PM
Don't get me wrong.. I'm not selfish at all.. I'm supportive and I understand what he's going through. However I'm just worried that this distance and pushing me off may effect our relationship.. That's what I'm so worried about. I do really love him and I'm sorry that he's going through those things, I just wish he would confide in me more & talk to me more about what's going on with his problems so I can be his shoulder to lean on. I've given him space, I just don't want him to take it as if I don't care. I want him to come to me with his problems, not shut me out of his life, which seems like what he is doing.. This is what's confusing me..

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Boyfriend seems too tired or busy for me anymore... Posted: 3/19/2009 12:04:34 AM
I've been dating this guy for the last 7 months. Everything has been going great except for this distance for the past couple of weeks. My boyfriend is a manager at a restaurant and he says they've changed his schedule and they've given him hectic hours. He also claims he's stressed out over his personal life & the new work schedule. He found out his parents are divorcing etc etc. Plus he just has a big weight over his shoulder with other issues. Now it seems like he's always at work and we hardly have time for each other anymore. I call most of the time, he says he's at work and he'll tell me that he will call back once he gets off. He usually keeps his word and he calls me,which is usually really late at night when he gets off. When he does call, we hardly stay on long to talk without him falling to sleep or saying he's tired and apologizes. His distance really has me paranoid because I'm wondering if he's losing interest or perhaps cheating on me. When I call, I mostly hear his co-workers in the background so I do know he's at his job most of the time. He's also stopped calling as much and he mainly calls me now just because I called him at work and he ends up returning my phonecall when he gets off. Without me initiating a call,days can pass without even hearing from him.. I can't even remember the last time we hung out. When he does have off days, he rather spend it staying at home sleeping, or spending time with friends or family because he doesn't have many off days to begin with.. I asked him if he was still invested in this relationship and he says he is but I don't know, I'm confused about how he really feels. He's just pushed me out of his life it seems. It also seems like him calling me is mainly a chore to him, because I always have to call and check up on him and he ends up telling me he's busy or he's at work and he'll call me back.His birthday is next week and I called today while he was at work & asked if he wanted to go out to dinner and he agreed. He told me he'd check his schedule for next week and he'll call me. I'm also ticked that I seem like I'm the man in the relationship.. always calling him and making the effort to do things.. I'm confused.. Is he over me or something? Or maybe perhaps he really is busy and it's effecting him?

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 41 (view)

Would it be cheating if your partner was having webcam sex with other people? Posted: 10/23/2007 8:57:00 PM
This situation is difficult because I'm talking with her now. Her boyfriend feels he's done nothing wrong because it wasn't a physical act. He personally feels as if he never cheated on her. He went on to say how much he loves her and that the girls meant nothing to him and that he was just having harmless fun, he really feels like it's nothing wrong as long as he doesn't act on meeting these women.He actually used the porno excuse! He said him camming with women is just like him looking at porn! I can understand her side because she actually believes that her boyfriend loves her but she's torn. At the same time she feels like now she may have made something out of nothing, but it still bothers her that he would cam with other women. What's funny is that the only reason he got caught is because he left the website open while his girlfriend visited and she found the site there so he confessed. Here's a question, what's the difference from married people being on cam masturbating with other people than looking at porn in a sense? It's almost like the same thing, a lot of people in relationships don't have problems letting their so look at another naked man or woman on a porno but it's a problem if they see a naked woman or man on cam. Just curious..

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Would it be cheating if your partner was having webcam sex with other people? Posted: 10/23/2007 2:19:20 PM
My friend is in a funny situation and I'm curious about the responses here on this. My friend found out that her boyfriend likes to join chatrooms and have webcam sex with annoymous females where he'll jack off on one cam and the female will be naked on her cam. Since the act is not really physical, would you count that as cheating? Personally I wouldn't be really bothered until something like that gets physical, to the point where he's actually meeting women from online for sex. I mean in a sense, it's sorta like him looking at porn, only it's a live female on cam. Anyway she's upset but do you think webcam sex is really a big deal when you're in a relationship?

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 45 (view)

Is anal sex safe without a condom? Posted: 10/10/2007 12:16:12 PM
Also is it true that even with a condom you can still contract an STD with anal sex because the condoms are more likely to rip and tear during anal sex??

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 89 (view)

Is it wrong to want a Friend with Benefits? Posted: 9/10/2007 6:39:12 PM
I did it once when I was younger and never again. There was a guy I used to see gradually and we both agreed that it was strictly a bootycall. To make the long story short I started catching feelings not even realizing that I was catching feelings. I thought I could handle no strings attached sex and I was wrong. He eventually found somebody he wanted to pursue more and he left me in the dust. What hurted was that he didn't see me as relationship material but as soon as the girl of his dreams came, he dumped me like yesterday's news.Never again!!! That hurted like hell! I came to the realization that he didn't respect me and all he saw me was a piece of meat he can just use from time to time. Never again will I degrade myself to that. Why should I let a man just use me for his pleasure?? No.. I'm worth more than that, I realisze that now. Never again will I do it, Sex is too emotional and most time we females are the ones that catch feelings. Not knocking people who do friends with benefits but most of the time it doesn't work.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 34 (view)

Sexual Addiction - Are you an addict? What's your definition? Posted: 5/20/2007 10:44:12 PM
A sex addict is someone who uses sex to escape from life or a way of coping. They use it as a depressant & rely on it to make themselves happy. They will almost do anything or use anyone to get sex, no matter who gets hurt or how it messes up their lives. Some would risk doing risky behavior which may involve having sex with numerous partners even unprotected. Other risky behavior may be frequent use of prostitutes or even becoming one. Treating their partners as objects rather than human beings. People who have this has serious issues, they use sex as a way of escaping something. It's unhealthy & damaging to their lives.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 32 (view)

Meeting this guy off the net but I'm seriously scared!! Posted: 5/5/2007 10:46:12 AM
This is the thing with the photos. It's like every picture I take, I THINK it doesn't look like me. I always come off looking different in pictures no matter what. I just feel that way and maybe it's me. In some of the pictures, I look like some dolled up superstar because I got the pictures taken at a mall that does that. I don't think I look as cute or beautiful as in the pictures and I'm worried he'll be disappointed when we first meet. With plain photos, I think I look too ugly. So I always show people the dolled up glamorous pictures, I always get more responses from those pictures than the plain photos. Pictures don't give a true accurate presentation of me and that perplexes me. If someone sends me a comment on my pic saying you look great! Are they really saying that about me or the pic? I know this sounds crazy! Well we're going to meet next week. The mall we're going to has a movie theater inside the mall, so afterwards we'll probably go to the food court to eat & talk. I'm not into dating or meeting people off the net so that's why I'm worried. I'm very self conscious and I'm worried the guy may not like me. I know that if he doesn't then I'll have to move on but I already have low self esteem as it is, so if he decides to disappear after we meet, I'll feel pretty low & depressed. I'll also be sad because this is the first guy I've connected with in a long time. I just have too many insecurities I need to work on!

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

Meeting this guy off the net but I'm seriously scared!! Posted: 5/4/2007 10:09:34 PM
LOL, I'm just really scared that he won't like me but I'll try.I need to learn how to be not so much of a chicken..

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Meeting this guy off the net but I'm seriously scared!! Posted: 5/4/2007 9:48:04 PM
I've never really done the whole internet dating or meeting anyone off of the net. But with this particular guy I think I'll give it a go. I've been talking with this guy on myspace for a month on the phone. He's really cool and he's the same age as me and he lives in my area. He asked me if I wanted to meet him at a local mall sometime to catch Spiderman 3 which is a movie both of us wanted to see. I've bailed on him three times and I feel like I can't bail out this time, I really want to meet him but I'm scared. I don't want to run him away because he is really cool. He's the only person I've connected with in awhile, we have long conversations and he makes me laugh. I really like him. However I'm worried things might change when we meet. He might not like the way I look since I think I look way different in pictures. Or I'm scared he might turn out to be someone completely different. I also hate meeting someone off the net, I hate first impressions and it makes me paranoid as to what he's thinking about me. I've never done this with a guy but he really seems cool. Should I give it a try??

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 354 (view)

Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....??????????? Posted: 5/2/2007 11:02:10 PM
I just thought about something. To have a friends with benefits with someone, that means it's ok for both of you to sleep around with other people. Meaning the more spread of stds even with a condom as some stds are not preventable from condoms yuck! You never know where your partner has been or who they were with yesterday, which makes FWB kinda scary.I mean at least with a relationship,there's more of a chance of the partner being faithful and not messing around, though it doesn't stop people. They could be messing with you one day and then messing with numerous other people the next day or even messing with more people within the same day. All I can say is if you going to have a FWB,choose your partners wisely & find out if they have other people on the side!

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 105 (view)

Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute? Posted: 4/19/2007 12:49:54 PM
Condoms are not 100% safe and that's what people need to realize. People think that if they wear condoms and decide to have one night stands and sex with strange people daily, that they'll be ok. Sure condoms may HELP in preventing stds and pregnancies but it's not guaranteed that you'll be safe from stds!Staying with one partner may help your chances & that's if the other partner is not messing around. Messing with a prostitute is risky in the std department because they've had so many people use them and they're chances of having or at least catching something is VERY HIGH! I'm sorry but no matter how down I am on my luck, I would not resort to prostituting for money, I'd rather be homeless on the street.If I need to make money, I will work hard to find other ways, I would never sink that low. I can't see how anyone can just let other human beings use them for money. Having strange men use your body like a toy you just bought out of the toy store. I'd also be disgusted at the men who frequents hookers. They would use another human being for their own sake in pleasure. The stuff some of these men do to prostitutes are sad, they forget that these people are human beings too. But whatever floats your boat I guess. I'd always be worried about the STD factor because you never know when something might turn up later.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

why dont i ever get messages Posted: 4/8/2007 10:14:15 AM
You'd actually be surprised at a difference what a picture can do. I normally like to use a webcam and take different shot of me and see which one gets the most responses. If that pic is the one that does, that's the keeper. Most people won't even reply to someone with a bad pic.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 89 (view)

Anyone else feel like giving up on Ross because of being unsuccessful? Posted: 4/5/2007 11:24:52 PM
I give up on trying to FIND someone. I think that's where we all mess up, we're constantly trying to find someone to make us happy when in reality, we have to learn to make ourselves happy. Who says that we need boyfriends and girlfriends. I think romance and love are supposed to come out of the blue and unexpected. You never know when that right person comes, as for some people that person may never come. When you look for love, you're almost looking for trouble half the time because they don't work. Love is really not something you go on the internet and click at profiles for. It just comes naturally and unexpected. Why not go out somewhere to find potential dates? You never know.. you might find your soul mate at the China Buffet or something LOL. Why not join clubs or get involved in your community?Doing things you like and meeting new people in the process? Anywhere where you might find your potential mate. You know I've actually have had more success this way than any website could offer me. It's seems like I meet more genuine real people offline than online!

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 26 (view)

Would you date a bi man?? Posted: 4/5/2007 11:18:26 PM
Nope sorry, I don't think I could be with a guy that likes the same things as I do. It would be weird going on dates and watching movies together, I make a comment on a good looking guy and he agrees with me. Plus many of us have probably dated Bi men and not even known it. This DL thing is very real and alot of men are in denial with their sexuality. Makes me scared really because these men cheat on their unsuspected girlfriends and wives with other men while the women are completely clueless about what's going on. These men are undetectable, they look and act just like the next straight male so you'd never know..

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 10 (view)

Profile pet peeves Posted: 4/4/2007 9:43:30 PM
1.)People who are EXTREMELY picky & have a long list of SUPERFICIAL,SHALLOW demands about what they want in a partner on their profile. They want someone with muscles,they want someone super sexy & this and that! That's very annoying to me. Shows me that your very picky and shallow. 2.)People that only have one sentence on their profile. 3.) People showing pics of celebrities or cartoon characters as their main pictures! With no face pics at all. That annoys me, I already know what the celebrities look like, I wanna see you! 4.)People that take a bunch of group pics and put them up, how are we supposed to know which one is you? 5.) People stating that their sexy & on their profile! It makes you seem like you got a big ego. It's good that your confident in yourself, but let people decide if you're sexy or not.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 79 (view)

Friends with benfits possible with out emotion... Posted: 4/3/2007 5:43:00 PM
It's risky! I think some couples can and some can't. Sex is a very intimate act and I think the main reason people tend to fall for their cut buddies is because they forget that it's just sex.I mean you are sharing yourself with that person and sometimes even kissing one another. That can confuse you & your buddy into wanting more from one another. Thus possibly you developing feelings for that person. I'm not into one night stands or cut buddies, I think sex should be really shared between someone you have romantic feelings for. It's easy to get confused, especially if you see that person almost everyday and you & your cut buddy are having one night stands, especially laying in bed.. cuddling next to one another. Someone is bound to start having feelings! I believe when you have sex with someone,you share a bond with that partner, a connection. You begin to get attached to that person. There are some people that can do it and some cannot.. It just depends on how good you are at detaching feelings out of the equation.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1393 (view)

Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all? Posted: 4/3/2007 11:21:16 AM
I always have to see a pic to guarantee and know who I am talking to. I always ask for more than one pic to make sure it's the person I'm talking to. I also talk on the phone with them for some months first to kinda feel how they are as a person. If I feel comfortable with them after months pass, I'll set up a date. I mean meeting someone without a pic is pretty risky, you never know who you're meeting, for all you know it could be a serial killer or a rapist.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 85 (view)

HIV+ Posted: 4/3/2007 11:12:01 AM
It's too risky to even be involved with an HIV+ person. I mean you can still care for that person but sex plays a role in a relationship no matter what anyone says. There's going to be a time when you have needs for sex and you can't really rely on your HIV+ partner for it, even having protected sex with this person is still a risk, because condoms are not always 100% effective on keeping you safe. That's playing Russian Roulette with my life. I can't go through life wondering each day if I caught HIV from my partner.. It's too much.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Why do people post blurry or small pics of themselves??? Posted: 4/3/2007 11:06:18 AM
I was just looking around profiles on different sites or what not and I was just curious as do why people post small pics or blurry pics that you can't even hardly see what they look like? I mean what's the purpose of even putting a picture of you up if I can't see what you look like? For instance, what brought me to this subject is one guys profile I was looking at earlier.All of his pictures weren't clear. All of them were distorted and blurry, I couldn't even really make out what he looked like. I'm just curious on what people think on this..

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 79 (view)

Why do guys say they are good looking in their profiles? Posted: 3/29/2007 9:06:03 PM
I think some do it for attention and some do it to stroke their egos because they may be insecure with themselves deep inside, so they have to convince the world that they are these super hot guys when they may not feel like it.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 147 (view)

People who state I'm attractive in their profile. Posted: 3/28/2007 7:34:15 PM
It's not really a big deal, but it kinda shows that they have a big ego about themselves & that kind of turns me off. It's like you're saying yeah "I'm the sh!t!" or something.Maybe you are the sexiest person in the world, but I don't have to hear it from your mouth to make it true. Not everyone will think you're hot too. I agree, it's like they're trying to convince you that they're attractive, let me be the judge..

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 77 (view)

HIV+ Posted: 3/28/2007 7:08:30 PM
I'm sorry, I'd still be friends with the person but I have to look out for my saftey. No doubt I'll still care and love for the person but it's too much. I think sex is a very important part of keeping a relationship together. Without that it's nothing much. I wouldn't risk having sex whether it's unsafe or not, it's too risky to be playing with my life. I wouldn't desert them, but the relationship would have to end.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 22 (view)

Ever have a crush on a cartoon? Posted: 3/27/2007 1:02:30 PM
I don't know how many people use to watch MTV's Daria! But I had a major crush on Trent LOL!

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

How many of you actually get tested for STD's? If not why? Posted: 3/26/2007 11:55:49 AM
I'm very careful about who I choose to be in a relationship with & these days and ages, you really have to be careful. I was just talking with a guy & he said that back when he was younger, he was very promiscuous and he slept with alot of women and had alot of one night stands.He said he used condoms with every woman he's been with but what people fail to realize is that condoms are not 100% safe. I'm not trying to scare people out there but it's still good to get tested to be on the safe side, especially if you change partners every week! People like to think that condoms will protect them in every circumstance when there's still a slight chance of catching something. The scary thing is you have to take a risk with your new partner, but you never know where your partner has been & what they've been doing. Where I am, HIV/AIDS is spreading around the city I live in. Alot of people are so ignorant to get tested and to practice safe sex. I am only 21 and I noticed alot the women I graduated high school with are pregnant now. Meaning there are so many people out there practicing unsafe sex. I'm not trying to sound like a prude but I'm just concerned. Alot of people still think that their invincible and that they can't catch anything but it's very possible that you can. I think I'm going to get tested soon. Do you get tested? Do you ask your partner who you've been with to get tested? I mean why should everyone put their life in jeopardy over someone else? Having safe or even unsafe sex with a person who doesn't even know they're HIV positive person is like playing russian roulette with your life.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 77 (view)

Are men wired to cheat? Posted: 3/23/2007 5:33:25 PM
I'm starting to wonder if it's even possible for people to stay in a 100% committed relationship all of the time? There may be instances where couples have done it but I find them rare. It seems like alot more people are having affairs and having sex with other people, or maybe it just seems like it. If you think about it, as human beings we were put on this earth to procreate with other people. In a sense, I don't think we were really meant to be tied down to one person.Even for people that don't have affairs,I'm pretty sure you've at least lusted for another person other than your partner. We may fall in love & you may love that one person but also you will have the desire to have sex with others, spreading as much of your seed as possible I guess. I'm not condoning infidelity or anything.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 22 (view)

Would you date someone knowing they had at some point in there life been a prostitute? Posted: 3/23/2007 5:22:14 PM
Maybe it's me but sex is a sacred thing for me. I don't judge other people and what they've done. I'd rather not know about it. It would bother me to know that they've been through hundreds,possibly thousands of people doing god knows what for money. Plus I believe the saying that goes.. whoever they slept with is whoever you slept with when you sleep with them. That disturbs me a little. Sex is an intimate thing and I really believe you become apart of that person you sleep with in some way or another. If I'm in a relationship with someone, I rather that they keep they're past sexual encounters a secret.As long as they don't have any STD's & they're fine physically and mentally,then they can be in a stabled relationship with me that's all that matters. Some things should just be left in the closet personally. As long as it's not threatening my health, I don't need to know about it.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 257 (view)

What have you learned from having your heart broken? Posted: 3/19/2007 6:35:41 PM
I've learned alot! 1.) I can't rely on another person for my happiness, it must come from within. 2.) I have to love myself first before I can love anybody else. 3.) If a relationship doesn't work, it's meant to end and the person was only supposed to be with me for a season to teach me a lesson in my journey in life. 4.) Life goes on, so instead of crying,just gently get up and try again. 5.) Just because someone says they love you, doesn't necessarily mean they meant it at all! 6.)If someone can't even respect themselves, how can I expect them to respect me?? 7.)Never stay in a bad relationship just because you're afraid of being alone. Being alone is the best thing for you! 8.)NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY IT'S COVER!

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Would you use a prostitute/escort? What do u think of people who use them? Posted: 3/16/2007 11:31:04 AM
I was just curious because I found out that one of my friends have used them occasionally. He said he did it because he was horny and he couldn't find a female that would have sex with him, LOL. How common is it for people to use these? I would never be as desperate to have sex with someone for money. It goes against my morals and it's degrading really. Not to mention STD's & some condoms can't even protect against.Ironically my ex cheated on me with them too so it makes me wonder how common is it for people to participate in this type of behavior? Would you use one?

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 28 (view)

multiple sex partners when u have a friend w/benefits or bootycall Posted: 3/12/2007 1:24:17 PM
That's why I don't like friends with benefits really.. Because you're probably not the only person he's messing with. It would sorta bother me and disgust me that last night, he might have been somewhere messing around with some other female and comes to me the next day. Yuck!

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 52 (view)

how much is too much sex partners? Posted: 3/12/2007 11:13:32 AM
It's none of my business about who my partner has been with in the past but I would like to know if they have any stds & have gotten checked anytime soon!

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 105 (view)

First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person. Posted: 3/12/2007 11:05:52 AM
See this is why I'm worried about meeting people on the internet. With cyberspace, you can actually make yourself out to be who whoever you want people to see you as. With pictures, it's hard because alot of people don't look like their pictures for one thing unless taken with a really good camera. Then people can do a whole bunch of things to make themselves look better in pictures. I've taken webcam pics & with programs like Adobe Photoshop, you can touch up the lighting and you can actually make yourself turn out to look like some supermodel.I'm vary wary of people who post glamorous shots like that because mostly, they won't look as good in person. Even if you see someone on a live webcam, it can still hide flaws, specifically if you have the cam placed at a nice angle. I'm very self conscious so I don't like to meet people off the internet. I always think I look better in my pics or in person and I don't want to throw people off. I'm worried that the person might not find me as attractive as they did on the webcam. I met one guy who I found very attractive on myspace. In his picture he portrayed himself to be this very macho muscular guy with light brown eyes. I was so mesmerized by his eyes, that I asked him, are those your real eyes and he replied with a yeah! So we met in person and how about he was more on the chubby side & I later found out that those were not his real eyes but he was wearing colored contacts instead. He was still cute and I actually began to like him, but I later found out he had even more skeletons in his closet that really began to freak me out so I left him alone. As I began to know him more, I began to see his true side. That's why I don't like meeting people on the internet, you can hide so much stuff about yourself and there are really crazy people out there so you gotta be careful. I rather just talk to someone I see at the mall or at the club or something. That way, you can see each other for who they really are and there are no disappointments. You really can't hide much when actually meeting someone face to face.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 32 (view)

How can you get over someone Posted: 1/25/2007 1:56:22 PM
I'm in the same boat but you have to cut off all contact with him. Meaning don't check up on him on internet sites or anything.It'll only prolong the healing process. Keeping yourself occupied with other things and hanging out with friends helps alot. It helps keep your mind off of him and it gives you time to heal and move on.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 42 (view)

Boyfriend has been on sex sites & I think he's seeing prositutes... Posted: 1/14/2007 12:08:18 PM
Thanks for the responses. He keeps sending me taunting texes about all I was to him was a h*e and that he never cared about me. Which really upsets me but I will be fine in time I suppose. Oddly I still miss the jerk, I miss the person he portrayed himself to be. I'm very alone and confused right now. I went to the club with friends last night so that took my mind off of things for awhile.Focusing on me is soo hard but I just hope things will get better, it hurts when you've been betrayed and you feel so hurt...

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 35 (view)

Boyfriend has been on sex sites & I think he's seeing prositutes... Posted: 1/8/2007 8:44:01 AM
I'll say it before like I said in another post! IT'S NOT ABOUT THE MONEY!!! It came out wrong. It would bother me that this jerk can screw and mess up so many people's lives and yet he gets to be a famous singer when he doesn't deserve it.I could care less about his money... I can actually see him messing up and not making it at all. He had so much confidence in his music career that he would drop out of college and quit his job which was extremely stupid on his part. So now he's living with a relative working on an album that might not even hit shelves.He's been a vocal arranger here in Atlanta Georgia for awhile and he's worked with alot of famous singers and producers so there is a possibility of him making it since it seems he has connections or what not. I could care less about being with him, I just feel that if you are a good person, GOOD things should come to you. It just doesn't seem fair that me, who tries to do good always get the short end of the stick and the bad people always win! He seems like a sex addict because in our relationship, now to think about it all he ever wanted to really do was have sex.If he makes it big, he'll probably end up doing the same thing with prostitutes and he'll probably get locked up. The one thing with fame is that your privacy is really gone because the press gets dirt and information on you 24/7.The past will catch up with him eventually I believe anyway... Right now, I'm very bitter and hurt and I just want him to suffer like he made me suffer.... I also think that text threat was to scare me, what a jerk! Right now I'm just going to focus on me and just learn to live life and love myself. It's really cold and lonely right now because things don't really look all that great right now and things look so good for him.

1Uniqueperson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

I broke up with my jerk of an ex, don't know where to go from here? Posted: 1/7/2007 11:58:11 AM
I don't get it, I know my ex was scum and that he cheated on me with prositutes and numerous women, and I am glad that we're through.However as crazy as it sounds I think I was more obsessed with the fact of having someone than liking my ex. I mean I know he was a bad guy but I fell for the charm, making me think that he understood me when nobody else did. He wormed his way into my life and made me feel like he was the only one I could trust. I seemed to ignore the warning signs of his infidelity and I lost my self-esteem in the sense that I would take crap from him just to hold onto him which wasn't healthy for me. I guess you can say I lost my sense of self getting involved with this guy. I always tried to block out the abuse, but rather accept him when he was kind gentle,funny and loving.I always ignored it when he didn't answer his phones, or treat me like crap. Then one day I had enough and it was over like that with no contact. I understand that it's for the better but now I'm left lonely. I got so attached to him because in a way he was like my counselor, I could relate to him like no one else. He's probably good at manipulating women. Don't get me wrong, I don't want him back, I just miss relating and talking to someone, even if my EX was a fake,a liar and a cheat.I know I sound really pathetic right now. Before I met him, I was seriously depressed because of my lack of friends and everything was boring. This was the beginning of last year when I met him.When I met him I began to be happy, until he turned into the jerk. Now that we've broken up, I find myself at the very same spot where I was before I met him last year, Depressed,alone and confused. Probably much worse now after all that went down with my ex. The fact that he would sleep with prostitutes and numerous women he doesn't know sickens me to death. I get sick thinking about him and at the same time, I keep flashing back to the good times and then to the bad times. It makes me bitter to know that there are such disgusting people out there that would not give a da*n about someone's feeling. It was all about him... Since that horrible chapter of my life is over.. I have to move on. I need to do some serious soul searching before I jump into another relationship. Everything is so depressing and boring now, almost like I give up on life in a way.I shouldn't need somebody in my life to make my life complete. I don't understand how to be happy by myself? I think this is my main problem and which ultimately made me stay in an abusive relationship for so long...

1Uniqueperson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 27 (view)

Boyfriend has been on sex sites & I think he's seeing prositutes... Posted: 1/5/2007 1:39:06 PM
Thank you guys! Reading these comments really are helping me alot and to get my head on straight. He sent me a text threatening me earlier! Saying that he can have me locked up for going through his e-mail.Which is true and I'm a little worried. He told me that he could file a lawsuit against me. I think he's just all talk and he probably wouldn't go through with it. I tried to call and text him back but the jerk won't reply. I'm not going to worry about it! The guy has issues, he seems like all that he's concerned about is sex and he probably has something. I will get checked for stds though. What worries me now, is that one time he was sick and he said he was feeling very weak and he was coughing up this clear liquid substance. I thought it was weird at the time but is that a sign of some kind of std?? This is what I'm worried about the most. Everytime we had sex we've used condoms. It seems like he gets sex from a different person everyday and everynight. I can't believe I even slept with this creep. I feel rather dirty.. I only had sex with him in the beginning when he put on the act that he was such a nice guy. Which was too soon!! I'm also a little worried about his text threat. What I did was illegal and I wasn't thinking rationally and now this creep could have me locked up for snooping around.. Should I worry about this and what can happen in this situation?

1Uniqueperson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 21 (view)

Boyfriend has been on sex sites & I think he's seeing prositutes... Posted: 1/5/2007 11:17:17 AM
I could really care less about his money. It came out the wrong way. I mean it will bother me that this guy will make it successfully when he doesn't even deserve it. I don't want him back but I'm really just bitter and hurt right now and that I didn't leave sooner.There were times where I would stop calling and he'd call me throwing that stupid sweet talk and he'd be nice all over again which I fell for. What I find stupid is that I miss talking to him on the conversation level. There were times where we had good talks or what not and I miss that and I can't find that with anybody else. Other than that I really don't miss him at all. I'm finding it gets easier everyday! I would like to find someone the total opposite of him. Right now I'm just going to work on me. Excercising and just focusing on me. If he do make it big, so what more power to him, he'll probably get his karma when that happens anyway. Fame doesn't bring happiness and the guy must be pretty miserable and alone if he has to meet different women everyday and prostitutes.

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

Boyfriend has been on sex sites & I think he's seeing prositutes... Posted: 1/4/2007 7:16:59 PM
I understand what I did was wrong but I got alot of proof. He's been actually talking to a whole bunch of females like I had thought. I understand what I did was extreme but he was driving me crazy. I lost my self respect and my self esteem getting involved with him, I feel pretty stupid and pathetic going through his stuff but at least now I have proof that my suspicions were true. Now I am alone and I'm hurt and bitter. We have had sex before and we've always used protection. But now I'm worried about Std's because I've seen him talk to a whole bunch of women on sex sites trying to get sex. From the looks of it he is very promiscuos and that scares me alot. What are the chances of me still catching an STD with a condom being used? Right now I'm very confused but I guess I will get over this in time...

1UniquePerson

Joined: 1/1/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Boyfriend has been on sex sites & I think he's seeing prositutes... Posted: 1/4/2007 5:52:11 PM
I'm so hurt and confused right now. When I first met my boyfriend, I thought he was such a nice guy. He'd call me everyday to ask how I was & we'd talk about everything. He really seemed to be a good guy. The last two months he just changed completely.We stopped hanging out and the only time he wanted to hang out is if he wanted sex.I caught onto that quickly and if I wanted to go to the movies or somewhere that didn't involve us being in one another's home, he'd find a way to get out of it. Then alot of the time, when I called him he wouldn't answer his phone like he used to. But if I called him on a number that he didn't recognise, he'd answer it! This should have been my sign to let this go but I couldn't let go because there were still times when he'd be sweet and he'd apologise and I'd fall for it everytime. Then he started only calling at night and the messages would be brief. He'd call me at all times of the night and he'd be out riding in his car. I'd ask him what are you doing out so late and he would never answer me. He'd always get off of the phone with me.Then he started saying things to ruin my self-esteem. Saying that I only think of myself and that I'm not as attractive as I used to be.He can be so cruel sometimes, telling me what I need to do with myself to look more appeasing to him. It made me sick. Then he'd call later apologising saying he was a jerk but he'd go do the same thing later on. So I started to get smart. I took drastic measures and I found out his myspace and yahoo password.I found a whole lot of devastating things. He has not told me anything about him getting a record deal and working on an album. He didn't even share this news with me and I'm supposed to be his girlfriend. My boyfriend works in the music industry as a vocal arranger and right now he's trying to make it as a singer. He keeps his personal life a secret which I hate entirely. He's met alot of famous people and he may make it big but the jerk doesn't deserve it. He's very talented but his personality stinks and everyone thinks he's just such a funny good guy like I was fooled to believe. He's been on numerous sex sites meeting up with all kinds of women and to make it bad, it seems like he talks and meets someone new everyday!!! In some of the messages he even brag about how good the sex was and all of the kinky stuff they do. I even thinks he's been with prositutes. There's one message from a lady and her screenname is ladybancock84. In the message it said " Sorry to have contacted you on your yahoo address but you left something here and you can return here to retrieve it, thank you." He's such a lousy creep and I'm so hurt and in shock right now. It makes sense why he hardly answered his phone and why he's been out all night cruising around. He's been with lots of women and probably even trying to talk to prositutes out in the street. So I confronted him about it yesterday and all he could do was hang up in my face.I tried to call him back and text him to finish this and he won't even respond and answer me back which really hurts me and makes me even more angrier!I'm so disgusted and hurt, what makes it so bad was he was the one who came to me and sweet talked me at first in the beginning. I was really cool in being friends with him but he had to change on me. This is going to be sooo hard for me, I hardly have any friends as it is and when he was the sweet guy, I had found someone that was there for me but all of that changed. So here I am lonely hurt and confused over this punk. It will kill me if he makes it big as a singer and here I am left with nothing...

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