A little confused over this... chat & forums.

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BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 12 (view)

A little confused over this... Posted: 11/21/2009 5:07:09 AM
don't sdwell on it...too often we think other people rude or poor behaviour must be something to do with us. it isn't you didn't do anything wrong...some people are just rude. i also think that some people join a site like this because it's free and tey are bored and that they can create a fantasy self thats always warm and charming and funny and never has a bad day..i think people sell themselves as something that want to be but actually forget that they are talking to real people and when something like an actual meet rears up as in your case...they scare themselves off. it's nothing to do with you..you just have to keep looking for the people who are seriously looking

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 36 (view)

I'm SO confused! Posted: 11/21/2009 5:01:27 AM
if the colest guy you ever met beats you harrasses you stalks you abuses you and hurts you then there is only one thing for it honey you need to be on your own you sound like this chap has battered your self esteem so low and made you think you can only have him that that exactly what you think you should do. he made you miserable...he will make you miserable again...you will never trust him again let it go

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

Was she the one? Posted: 11/21/2009 4:57:28 AM
i think you need to sort your self out, spend some time on your own , work out who you are after 20 years of marriage before you even think about goignout with anyone new. don't uproot someone else's life before you are sure you can cope with a relationship...all relationshios go through ups and downs...you havn't learnt from your marriage yet and you need to do that and work out how you will cope with ups and downs in the future ...if i were you i would arrange to have some CBT counselling.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 72 (view)

met my soul mate, but he doesn't want me Posted: 11/21/2009 4:51:07 AM
all you have said here is that you have been talking to someone for 8 months.........so have you actually met this person in the flesh? have you been out? gone on dates? had a laugh? made love? etc etc......................you say it has ended because YOU are hurt beyond repair...what does that actually mean? does it mean that you have been hurt BEFORE this chap and have you gone down the needy route with someone who writes well? i'm a bit confused by your questions here but you donlt seem to be hearing that this man feels differently and if you have been arrogant and demanding about what you want from him or your level of expectation from him ...then i kind of get his point.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 41 (view)

I think I've scared him big time, how to resolve this? Posted: 11/20/2009 4:08:35 AM
whu don't you just ask him out........what's the worst that could happen...he could say no...fair enough. but you donlt know him so it's no great loss..but at least you will know.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 54 (view)

Should high heels be banned in the work place? Posted: 10/30/2009 10:06:14 PM
haha great thread well i wouldn't dream of wearing any kind of heel at work..i pretty much run laps of a very large building for 12 hours a day and we frequently have to do hard hats and high vis..i also get 3 mins to investigate a fire alarm so i'm a flatty st work girl. however my old job was very office based very sedentry and the biggest risk to my health and saftey was walking to the water cooler. yet in that job we had a ban on heel, open toes, and had to have shoes with ankle straps...which was just plain silly. no i don't think heels are demeaning she bought them didn't she?

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 64 (view)

Turn off or turn on jobs Posted: 10/27/2009 6:04:38 PM
i like people who do vocational stuff or creative stuff just because i think they will be on the same sort of wave length and because they have pursued a goal generally. i can;t imagine any one wanting to be a traffic warden or a tax insoector when they were kids

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

japanese reality show terrorist attack Posted: 10/26/2009 3:21:49 PM
ok so i'm watching have i got news for you and they have just done a bit about a japenese reality show which is a bit like a really bad extreme version of beadles about (if beadle took a lot of class a's) basically the 'contestant' who doesn;t knwo he is in a TV show was sitting in what he thought was a normal meeting at work everyone else in the meeting has blood packs on queue everyone suddenly exploding with bullet wounds being picked off sniper style and the 'contestant rocking on the floor in the featal position. apparently they are recreating actual terrorist attacks seriously does any one else think this is just plain wrong> do you think TV has finally reached 'running man' proportions. do you think this unwitting contestant may be scarred for life

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 130 (view)

A Very Ugly Situation - What Would YOU Do? Posted: 10/25/2009 9:53:05 AM
yes thats pretty tragic what a git this guy is. however i don't thinkyou can fire him as his actions are not strictly work related. i would go down the route of having a pretty strong chat to make it known that he was overheard and that his coomments are not acceptable at work

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 76 (view)

Is Dating over 30 tougher than it was when you were in your 20's? Posted: 10/25/2009 6:47:24 AM
yes i think you are right. it seemed to me that as soon as i turned 30 new peoples expectations of me changed suddenly i'm supposed to have it all figured out lol. i have friends from school who have been married for 10 years and have chidren in school mortgages the works. my career and lifestyle choices in my teens and twenties were different...i went to uni, moved around for work, tried different places and things had some serious and long term relationships and some flings, worked hard and partied hard. looking at dating people now i'm shocked by how miserable everyone got...most the guys my age here seem to be divorced or seperated with kids and have a lot of negatove views of women going on or else they are guys who still want to be out clubbing every night taking drugs and getting smashed..not realising that they are getting to the be old enough to be the fathers of the women they are trying to chat up. i'd love to find someone like me who has a young and positive outlook and is just ready for the next phase

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 7 (view)

face to face date VS. messaging? Posted: 10/25/2009 6:27:42 AM
personally i hate endless messaging...a site like this should be an introduction service only not the basis of an entire fabricated relationship with someone, if you like the look of someone and correspond enough to find then interesting then you should go fr a coffee at least. i think the problem for some people is that they are expecting to find 'the one' online ...never going to happen if you donlt get off your arse and meet up sorry...someone who wants to send endless messages for months or even years is wasting your time. i reckon a couple of weeks is a maximum unless there are extenuating circumstances i was chatting to a guy once who turned out to be in the next street to me and spent ages dawldling over a meet when we finally did it turned out he had a0 lied about his age and b) lied about his wife! nuff said

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 34 (view)

sick trio jailed Posted: 10/25/2009 5:52:39 AM
i remember reading somewhere that one in about twenty of us has psychopathic tendencies/capacities which lay dorment until you met someone else in the same mindset and then you get pairings like hindley and brady/the wests/the bolger killers etc etc so yes absolutly there is something in these women already and i think it was just a bad mix if sick people pushing their own sick boundaries/fantasies because they felt empowered in a group. from what i have read there is always someone in a group like that who is the diminant person...actually i think any group situation has that...it's just what makes this particular group dynamic tick is sick.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 56 (view)

Woman's nails Posted: 10/25/2009 5:42:04 AM
hiya lillian, i like having nice nails i managed to give up biting them about 10 years ago...(for anyone who wants to stop biting them wear false ones for a while..as you can't bite them it gets you out of the habit, your nails won't be in great condition afterwards for a while but once you have broken the biting habit it's easy to grow them out) however, i don't tend to paint just a good clean and polish with one of those buffer things to make them shiny, when i am not working or for something special i like french manicure but thas about it. as for blokes liking them, my sister grew hers ridiculaously long and had a web page devoted to photo's of them apparently it's quite a fetish thing and she had guys sending her packs of nail varnish and stuff. as for men noticing the little things i think that less important than how doing the little things makes you feel.....i know that when i make an effort with myself, roots done, eyebrows in order, defuzzed, nails done etc etc i feel good and when i feel good about my appearance i feel sexier...so i think guys must pick up on that and notice you feel good about your self

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 116 (view)

So, what's 'wrong' with The Daily Mail and those who read it? Posted: 10/25/2009 5:17:43 AM
i think it's probably because if you beleive the tone of everything you read in it you would never leave the house again but the other rahs are no better ..i refise to have the sun in my house or the mirror...i read private eye now and again because they sey things staright and ask the right questions other wise i watch the news or go to the bbc website

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 24 (view)

women who lie about being raped Posted: 10/25/2009 4:25:04 AM
this is a really tough one. i think it's pretty disgusting and horrendous to do it to a bloke obviously. this happened to a guy who lived near me when i was a kid and he only avoided prison because his mates had taken photos of the love bites she had given him to take the mick out of him. he still had police questioning still had to deal with the rife gossip of a small commmunity and still went to court in the end i think and still had his name and rape in the same sentence in the press. poor guy that has to scar you for life. but no, women who lie about it should not be treated in the same way as rapists are thats just silly. telling lies however dispicable is not raping someone and shouldn't be treated as such. otherwise evertime anyone says 'ooh i could kill him', they could be banged up, well ok not quite the same but you get the drift. i think the issue for the police/legal services is whats her actual crime? telling lies in this way isn't that kind of crime, i don't think is comes under fraud, there is no phiscal gain, it's not stalking, it's possibly abuse but abuse sentences i think are shorter and anyone who's had to dead with neighbour abise etc knows it take a long time to build a case to prove it. i think wasting police time is about as strong as it gets. someone lying in this way clearly needs a lot of medical intervention if they have definatly lied but how do yo actually prove that? i think the reason cited for why most women don't even tell people they have been raped is bcause they know proving it is so difficult.....my facts are a bit shaky here but most people know that the majority of rapes are committed by rapists known to the victim in situations where the rapist saw an opputunity to take advantage, leaving most rape victims feeling that is was their fault in some way etc i read a story once about a women who worked with a bloke in a pub and when the staff sat about having a drink one night he put rohypnol in her drink his defence was that he knew she liked him but thought she was shy and that it would help! this guy was convinced he had not raped her but was helping her! i think rape has always been one of the most troublesome things to define and there are tonnes of threads on here about date rape, women unable to consent as they are too drunk, is it rape when this that and the other. i think you have to define in what way the accuser lied..if the accused was aquitted it doesn't necessarily mean the accuser was lying it may mean thats how she felt but a jury felt the situation was such that man actually believed the women had given her consent i'm not 100% but i think in some of those cases certainly that how the rape is quanitified ...did the accused know and do it anyway. slightly off topic op sorry but you don't get black and white answers to grey questions

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 27 (view)

How rude! Posted: 10/25/2009 3:58:44 AM
[All I was doing was pointing out that he was acting in the same fashion that he was moaning about] actually no, what he was 'moaning' about was sending lengthy initial mesages that don't get a response. not, notresponding to people he isn't interested in and have only expressed negative interest in him. you are missing the point lovely lady...you have no business on a dating site making any negative comment about someones profile ..if you didn't like his profile don't mesage him easy peasy. [What's happened to common courtesy? Would you just ignore someone who spoke to you in real life?] oh for wont of better analogy the real life equivelant of what you did would be like...overhearing a conversation that doesn't concern you..walking up and making a negative comment about someone else conversation........so yes in the real world if you did that to me you would be lucky to be ignored and even luckier not to get a big fat fook of and mind your own missus! you are bothering about this way too much. you mentioned POF ettiquette a couple of times so the best bit of pof ladies finishing school etiquette training i can offer you is if you don't like someone, disagree with something in their profile, don't want to create a relationship with them in any way leave them alone and get on with your life.............................this person forgot about you the second he clicked block.......why are you still bothering?

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

How rude! Posted: 10/24/2009 6:40:48 PM
oh dear i'm sorry to say it but actually i think this guy blocking you was fair enough lets look at it from his point of view..he made an (admittedly negative) remark in his profile simply stating his personal preference/experience of initial messages. he looked at your profile, decided he did not want to contact you and moved on. you then sent him a negative message, which he elected to ignore because if he wasn't interested iin talking to you from your profile then he wasn't interested in respondeing to a negative message from you. you then sent a second even more negative message ignoring the first two indicators that this chap wasn't interested in speaking to you. at this point he elected to block you confirming that he did not want to speak to you. unable to speak to him you have now decided to continue bothering about this person by opening a public debate about him. not to be harsh but i think that would count as pestering whats more interesting is why you are bothering about this person? if you find something negative or that you consider unappealing in a profile then move on to the next one, thats the whole point of having a profile, so you can choose whether you want to date someone or become friends etc. i'd say you need to forget about this. lifes is way too short to worry about who you don't want to be friends with. best

bbwactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 41 (view)

Dumped for Answering Honestly! LOL Posted: 11/9/2008 3:08:17 AM
soooo lets get this straight...you are a mature good looking woman previously married with a grown up family and openly dating and/or having 'long term' relationships......did this man think you were going to be a virgin? i'm not sure i understood all the ins and out of your post but i'm wondering why you are bothering over someone who can't communicate or who has unreasonable expectations of a woman of your age and experience......clearly this chap thought he could brush you of after the 4 months previously and then pick you up when the grass wasn't greener...you wrote him off before once bitten twice shy love.

bbwactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 167 (view)

Thanks, but your not my type. Posted: 11/5/2008 6:18:36 AM
yes this has happened to me a few times. one gentleman in particular sticks out as quite vicious...he sent me a really awful intro message that was very self deprecating (and not in humorous way) and frankly a bit depressing....i sent him a message that was polite and a gentle no thanks. he demanded to know why....me being me thought i'd give him an honest 'constructive' response and explained that his initail message had been a bit much and was a bit depresing and didn't make him come over in a positive way.........he sent a barrage of really abusive messages about how women ( me in patricular) were all bee atches who never gave anyone a chance etc etc and then he blocked me. i've also had several people who after one or two basic hello emails have become really agressive when not responded to immediatly....and i mean like 10 minutes while i'm responding to something on here not like days etc. very scary

bbwactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 16 (view)

Lazy eye advice. Posted: 10/31/2008 5:47:09 PM
i don't know about adult treatment but i had a lazy left eye when i was a kid and spent lots of time straightening it with a patch over my right eye take the left work harder. was the best pirate in school you should really go to the opticians and get professional advice though

bbwactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 55 (view)

dating a vegan/vegetarian? Posted: 10/22/2008 4:52:31 AM
go for asian food...indian restaurants in especial....or muslim if you can find them...since a lot of them cater for people who don't eat meat but have meat dishes on the menu for those that do..i also find most are willing to accomodate. in fact now that i've typed that i think most food outlets are catered to both, so you should just treat it like any other date.

bbwactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 38 (view)

Living with your ex... Posted: 10/19/2008 7:34:05 AM
funnily enough i've been thinking about this very thing. i'm broke at the moment and have been thinking of the easiest way to sort the problem out...my ex with whom i am still mates has 2 spare rooms not all that far away from where i work and it would be dirt cheap and convenient as hell. but then i asked myself...would i date someone in that situation and decided that..honestly..no i wouldn't...so i'm staying put and will just have to be even busier in my life. and get another job to go with the ones i already have. which of course probably means i won't get to meet anyone anyway...catch 22. howvever i do have a good friend who lives with his ex wife...they both have new partners and it works really well for them...so it is possible. it's all going to depend on the person you meet really.

bbwactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 109 (view)

How did your parents meet? Posted: 10/19/2008 7:01:03 AM
my dad was from a reasonably well to do family in the village..you know had a brand new car given to him on his 17th birthday (and this was in the 1950's, he was a bit of a lad about town popular and well liked. my mum, 10 years his junior, was a scruffy kid from a scruffy family who was eventually fostered our to reletives in my dads village when her errant family could no longer provide for her. they met first when she was 9..coming out of the local shop in the snow and he was going in he knocked her over and sent her flying by accident. i think he must have been nice o her after because she had a crush on him right into her teens when she finally managed to get him talking by giving him a cigarette when she was 14 when she saw him on a bus (lord knows where his car was). they were married by the time she was 16 and i am the 7th of their 9 children...they got me by chance..my dad was only on leave from an army exercise in bassingborne for a few days and mum was using contraception....still they got me and i was given the nickname bassingborne houdini for the early part of my life.

bbwactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

why is my bestfriend(female)accusig me of other females.we are not dating. Posted: 10/9/2008 11:19:50 AM
oooooooo i feel a when harry met sally moment coming along sounds fairly simple...either your friend fancies you and is trying to follow the friends to something more. route..or she is just a bit possesive/needy and is unclear about your relationship if you are into her ten have a chat and then...go forth and multiply if you are not then go on a date, tell her about it and see what she says

bbwactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 300 (view)

Do you believe you can meet someone online? Posted: 10/9/2008 11:12:45 AM
agree totally with applegeek, online dating is simply a way to introduce you to people whom you otherwise might not meet. if you want to spend years emailing and 'getting to know' then you'll probably fall off your cloud at some point because no one can be exactly what you might imagine them to be. it's a romantic idea but entirely impracticle. if you think, can i meet up with someone having met them online, get to know them, date and go out with them...then yes it's entirely possible and actually pretty common these days. for my two penneth i think the hold up for most people is that they don't actually seem to want to 'meet' people.

bbwactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 71 (view)

Why do people judge by looks ? Posted: 10/8/2008 2:52:25 PM
ok there seem to be two things to talk about. firstly you are assuming that people are not responding to you because of what you look like based on your profile picture. That may well be true for some people but there could be a number of reasons, now these women who don't even send you a no thanks are very rude it doesn't mean they are rejecting you on the basis of what you look like. secondly yes people are visual, i read something once that said basically what attracts us is animal instinct depending on what a person is looking for, people tend to chase good genes in a 'best genes for my children' style. it its very much a part of our decision to talk to someone. then everything else comes into it too. stop worrying about what other people you don't know and will never meet think....that way madnes s lies best

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 253 (view)

30 and never married? Posted: 8/4/2008 1:32:36 PM
i don't beleive in it...simple as that i'm 30 and have never married, been asked once. talked about it/thought about it with another. i've had a few long term (about 4 years was the longest) relationships and a few short term ones..i took both offers seriously and thought about whether i wanted to get married....and in the end...it just doesn't make sense to me...i'm not of a faith that practices marriage, i'm not any ones parent, i don't need any excuses to dress up and throw a party..i do that anyway. and when i am in longterm relationships i am committed monogamous and practice mutuality, equality and respect because that's the right way to treat people..not because a legally binding contract says i have to or becuasd ei think a marriage licence will protects me from things going wrong.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 13 (view)

what else do you do on the web? Posted: 8/3/2008 1:32:20 PM
pof'ing, and another dating site i'm on for us big gals, shopping....ebay, amazon, argos, wilkinsons, and i do my groceries online too as i don't drive. train tickets, gig tickets, information...bus and timetables, study, job searches, audition notices, castings and agents, i read online theatre industry newspapers, reviews, and listings. local 'what's on' information and cinema listings, film reviews. conversion tables, recipes. medical info, pet care, volunteering groups etc. socialising........ facebook, friends reunited, and MSN i have lots of friends scattered around the country and a few abroad so facebook has been great for chatting and keeping up with them. i also have family serving overseas so i use the military contact websites too. entertainment.....i like looking for random stuff on Utube...i also like watching bits of comedy/standup on there..(just type in any comedian you like) . BBC i player has been a god send as i can't get cable or freeview here and the landlords are twitchy about me having a sky dish. .....and yes porn, there's always room for porn........... other than that i am a bit of a geek and i like sticking a random idea into google or a random 'top of my head want to know more about' subject in wikipedia and finding out more about something....of course you end up bouncing around lots of subjects for there.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 46 (view)

Barry George hung? Posted: 8/3/2008 7:45:58 AM
charles bronson...???????????? WTF??? capital punishment for bad actors...that's a bit strong isn't it? maybe i should switch careers and become a mass murderer instead seems safer.. i think you mean charles manson sweetie and charles manson didn't murder anyone he was convicted of murder but he was co conspiritor in the tate labianca murders, as far as i remember. i think even if capital unpunished were reintroduced into our legal system barry deorge woukd still be alive anywasy...we would end up like americans...all there death row blokeys seem to die of auld age languishing in prison waiting for one appeal or another

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 22 (view)

Housing Circumstances Posted: 7/25/2008 4:03:05 AM
[geek you are so wrong on this. there are 2 readily available choices in rented accommodation. cr@p and barely affordable or good and totally unaffordable.] nope you are wrong here....i privately rent a 2 stories in a beautiful 4 story Victorian house...my apartment is huge, in a great location with good neighbours and i can rent it for as long as i like provided i keep up with the rent..as the business that owns the chain of mews it's on have nothing else to do with the space but let it out. in addition my home is far bigger than anyone else i knows..to the extent that i have rooms i just don't go into. it is clean and well looked after..if something breaks or leaks i phone and the next day someone else comes and fixes it. if i get bored change, job or need to move it will take 1 month i won't have to wait forever trying to sell in a non existent housing market. i get all this for the bargain prices of £395 a month and i don't know anyone who has a mortgage as low as that. yes there are things that i would improve if i owned the place and had the money...but if i owned the place i wouldn't have the money. i don't care if someone owns their own home or not

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 235 (view)

Falsified Profiles Posted: 7/24/2008 5:14:36 PM
it's not reallt an issue is is? if you thikn a profile is false....don't respond to it...simple as that.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

Whats your most embarrasing moment? Posted: 7/24/2008 3:56:46 PM
mines a corker. a few years ago i rented a house from quite a snooty letting agents, wasn't too bad though as my friends dad worked there showing people around the house...for anyone who doesn;t know you usually have to have house inspections every 6 months or so to make sure you are not recking the place and when you move out they do another inspection to decide whether they will keep part of your bond against any damages. well the owner of the house decided to sell up so i found myself a new place and spent ages cleaning and sorting out the house to make sure i could put the bond on the next one. i did the works..hired a carpet cleaner...repainted the bathroom, took the cooker apart to clean it i even threw out all the old crap years worth of previous tenants had left in the house, you name it. ho ho thought i..i will surely get all of my bond back now. MEi moved out and a few days later had a message on my answer phone....'it's mark from the agents, clive (my mates dad) has done your final inspection but he found a personal item which has been taken to the office for you to collect...it's erm....a pink item...erm could you call us?' hmmmm thought i , what can it be...pink bag ..check...pink scarf ...check...nope no pink item i could think of...so i called......... 'ME: ' hi mark i'm told i left something in the house...i'm not going to bother coming to fetch it if it's something small you can throw it away what is it??'' MARK: ' erm it's a personal item'' ME: 'yes yes what??' MARK ' it's erm pink and errrr'' ME: (impatient) 'well what?' MARK:...'it's a VIBRATOR!!!!!' silence............. it gets worse ME: (mortified) 'well it's not mine!!!!!!! i mean i have one but i can assure you mine is with me' MARK:...''you want to collect it?'' ME: ' not a chance' i cringe every time i see my friends dad now

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

what was the last nice selfless thing you did for someone else Posted: 7/16/2008 11:20:27 AM
erm....just that really....what was the last nice selfless thing you did for someone else? i'm not talking take a bullet for someone..(unless you actually have in which case..well done you) donated any kidneys recently? made someone a brew and not made yourself one? mowed a neighbours lawn?....anything?

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 4 (view)

Expensive cross breeds. Posted: 7/10/2008 2:04:24 PM
my sister has just bought an inuit puppy for several hundred pounds her other dog is a mongrel she got from a rescue centre and is quite unique as it looks like a fox... an iniut on the other hand was originally a crossed breed between German shepherds and husky type dogs so what you end up with is a beautiful dog that looks a little bit like a Canadian wolf but is wonderful in temperament and very intelligent and easy to train...inuits have been bred pure for many generations now and so i think they are classed as a pedigree. they were specifically bred in terms of compatible breeds for size and health etc...some of the other 'fashionable' crossbreeds have been bred simply as an accessories to the consumer lifestyle without thinking of the animals gene pool..i know someone who works in a rescue centre and she says that there is an increasing number of these dogs being dumped when their fashionista owners get bored and realise they actually don;t want to look after a dog. on the other hand my mum recently aquired a pure bred chocolate labrador for free, normally these cost in excess of about £350 but there was a very slight chance the litter could have been mixed so the breeders gave them away quick just incase. i'm three floors up so i can't have a dog unfortunately but i'd love one and when i can i'll be happy with a rescue mutt.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 34 (view)

Wot would u do if an animal was in your bra? Posted: 7/10/2008 10:34:22 AM
chance would be a fine thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 19 (view)

lonely in public?? Posted: 7/9/2008 1:30:34 PM
nope i take a sister or friend with me and go talent spotting

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

Crazy First Date! Posted: 7/9/2008 1:26:33 PM
hmmmm i had one of these guy turned up with a weird well rehearsed speech.he told me where he was going to live what he was going to do and what his children were going to be called and then said...so can we just get on with it them erm no

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 80 (view)

Why is it that most of the wemon i attract are large? Posted: 7/8/2008 1:57:55 PM
i don't think it's you mate i hink it's statistics...in your country as in mine there are more fat people than thin people so statistically you are more likely to be approached by women who are fat because there are more fat women than thin one clear as mud

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 20 (view)

Police dogs wearing boots? Posted: 7/6/2008 1:27:22 PM
mmmmmmm well hows about respecting animal rights instead there PC brigade going mad again...........i listened with amusement to a very mixed race/culture group of friends the other day bemoaning the fact that their kids were not allowed to sing 'ba ba black sheep' the other day...half the stuff they make up is ridiculous and frankly if the police are raiding your home the last thing on your mind should not be ...'has that dog got boots on'

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Giving to the homeless...do you? Posted: 7/6/2008 1:21:40 PM
ok before we start i'm not really much of a worthy sort and i'm probably guilty of doing things for people so that it's me who feels better on occasion...not always but sometimes...anyway the other day i was in a takeaway (no really) and a a homeless chap came in to beg food the bloke behind the counter was very very rude to him so i bought the bloke some food we had a natter about how rude some people are and went our seperate ways. in the past i've seen a bloke bedding down in a doorway on a cold night and given him the spare room for a night, after a family party we took all the left over stuff to the local haunts. i'll buy the big issue and more often than not will hand over change...anyways on to the point of the thread...i had a big party a couple of months ago and was left with gallons of booze, lots of which i don't like or won't drink (and don't know anyone who will) that is just taking up space. after meeting the bloke in the takeaway the other night who had the ripe old smell of tenants super or whatever on him i suddenly thought...i'll give it to the local homeless i mentioned this idea to my friend who went nuts. seems there is a massive school of thought that says give them money and they'll drink it or buy drugs....and i reckon that's their business not mine..if i was sleeping on the streets i'd want something to perk me up..and yes i know the argument about they'll never get out of it but i reckon sober or not their chances are slim to anorexic...sooo .......... do you give to the homeless would you take the booze out to them if you are against giving to them how come? like i say I'm not trying to be worthy and i'm not too much of a leftie it just makes sense to me

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

IV'E HAD IT OUT TWICE TODAY Posted: 7/6/2008 10:26:02 AM
well you know what they say about the British weather don't you? if you don't like it .... wait twenty minutes

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 34 (view)

Favourites oh why why why Posted: 7/6/2008 8:28:58 AM
ok so the OP is a little strange but to answer the original question. i don't spend ages on this site but i dip in and out occasionally i'll do a search or bounce through a few profiles and see who's about if i find one that's interesting, i think i may wish to read or look at again, or i'm interested in contacting but don't have bags of time there and then i'll file it away as a favourite just so i can remember who they are ...and erm thats about it really. sometimes i won't visit the site again for a while so they stay in my favourites list.no biggie.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 26 (view)

wheelchair users?????? Posted: 7/5/2008 3:13:35 AM
hiya.i don't know any female wheelchair users so i don't know if it's harder for us girls but i do have two male friends who are. one since birth and the other who fell out of a tree whilst pissed at uni and broke his back....both of them seem to pull like crazy..i'm sure it's difficult to get past some peoples narrow mindedness at time but it can be done. i've never been out with someone in a wheelchair but i did date someone with no arms once ( if we are allowed to bunch disability together here) ..cos he was a nice bloke and pretty fit.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

where would you put it???? Posted: 7/3/2008 4:15:17 PM
So was just thinking..........if you had an unlimited amount of money to improve the UK but could only put it into one area of government...where would you put it? education? policing? arts? healthcare? benefits? and of course why would you choose it. me..i dunno ..but i suppose it has to be education..teach people properly and they'll look after themselves kinda thing.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 31 (view)

trying to be safe online Posted: 6/26/2008 9:01:19 AM
yep seriously mate inviting a stranger to your house at night is super dodgy and you certainly weren't being safe enough...as everyone else has said public place and don't give out your address blah blah.....call me old fashioned or cynical (and this is in no way suggesting this is what yo were doing) but were i a bloke and a woman i'd been speaking to for a couple of days invited me straight to hers at night i would think..'she's well up for it' rather than 'she's looking for mr right' if said 'sure thing' then asked for very personal details when i was expecting a one nighter i'd react like your dodgy bloke did....sounds like he thought he was on to a one nighter and you put him on the back foot rather than him being some date raper or whatever..not suggesting that you were obviously thats your business but just a thought. however i'd also point out that even if he had given you his home /work address it would have been use to man nor beast as you have no way to know if they were actual... if he was dodgy he could just make them up and you would be none the wiser unless you were going to go on some weird mission to check him out which puts you in bunny boiler territory hence he was probably upset with you. so really public place in the day ...far less hassle in the long run........that said i do know someone on this site who sends copies of photo's and profile's to her sister before she meets anyone and does do a google/facebook on peoples names she even searched the electoral register once for someone...one or two people have told me they have looked at my facebook to to check i'm really me so that seems quite common these days. as for me well...no on mails me or replies these days so i'm safe as houses lmao...

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 20 (view)

could you live with impotence in your relationship Posted: 6/21/2008 6:21:24 PM
thanks for the comments folks..seems it's a far more common problem thank people (me)..for those of you with personal experience thank you for sharing.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

could you live with impotence in your relationship Posted: 6/19/2008 2:36:16 PM
ok so a friend of mine has just split up with her partner of 4 years.....i'm doing the friend in need bit and have been having long chats fuelled by gallons of wine, shopping, pub the usual..girl stuff .....anyway my friend has confided in me that (although not the only reason) a factor in her leaving was that her ex partner is impotent, they have never had penetrative sex at all although she says they had a very good physical relationship in other ways. apparently it took 2 years of gentle prompting to get him to a doctor as she'd read about it being symptomatic or heart problems and diabetes, after tests he checked out fine and after another year told he he had been ok'd for viagra....that was a year ago and he has never mentioned it again..she said that if she brought it up he w0uld say about side effects or that he wanted to be fitter or cut down on drink etc before he tried it but has not actually done this. my friend said that in the end she stopped feeling attractive, she felt less attractive because she could not please him in traditional ways and was uncomfortable with the alternative ways he liked, her libido died although when they were intimate it was ok. my friend seems to have decided that his problems are psychosomatic and although she was a bit vague indicated that he had not had a sexual relationship with anyone for about 10 years before they met. (she is 28 he is 39) my friend said that she had always just assumed that one day with enough encourangment and patience etc they would. but that in the end it dawned on her that ..penetrative sex just isn't part of his sexuality and it is hers. she's pretty much in bits and feels really guilty and said she feels shallow. she said the worst was when they did split he suggested she have lovers but stay with him. so question time people, I'm pretty stumped on how to advise /help her..personally i think she's done the right thing as it seems she did everything she could to explore the situation with him. and ultimately was unhappy..i don't think i could be in a relationship with someone impotent (oral sex or not.) and unwilling to deal with it. i'm wondering if any other pof'ers feel the same have you had a similar experience., ladies does being able have sex effect how you feel about yourself ..and guys...ok i know it's a sensitive issue but if you did have erectile dysfunction problems why..like this guy...would you not do anything about it. how long would you stay how long would you wait or could you just accept that you would never have sex again?

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

interesting sales tactics? Posted: 3/5/2008 3:21:50 AM
[Quote them high so that if they say no, they get rejected by the girl. It's a bit mean but it gets results! That way, they can pay more for the same room than I could have sold for, my record is £160 room only when I could have done £89 bed and breakfast.] and this hotel is where exactly??? yeah i think it's standard practice to flirt with a potential buyer, sales people flirting appear confident, relaxed and genuine they distract you from the numbers by making you feel at ease or exited. it's a recognised sales thing in call centres these days. there was recently a survey that came up with the result that Scottish and north-eastern accents are perceived to be the most trustworthy (not to mention sexy) hence the call centres that are left in this country recruit heavily in those areas to improve sales potential.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

Should We Condem The UK's Celebrity Drug Culture More? Posted: 3/5/2008 3:01:29 AM
hey hams, i think it's just another nail in the coffin of British culture personally, we have a filthy unscrupulous, sensationalist media machine that chucks out 'celebrities' by the dozen and mounts some farcical love/hate relationship campaign with it's audience. how else could we possibly entertain the notion that someone like jade goody is a role model ....a woman famous for being below average intelligence and erm that's about it. (still wouldn't mind being a quid behind her now though) not only do we have human carnage like pete doherty held up as role models but we get that other waste of carbon kerry katona as celebrity mum of the year. this is a woman who spends half her time in rehab and the other half wailing like a fish wife around the streets of Warrington. we have a youth culture now with aspirations only to become a WAG...emmiline pankhurst must be spinning in her grave. still all that said...who's fault is it really? the media will only produce what it thinks will sell which it does...the media is not our parent or an authority figure it doesn't make laws or define our morals it is there purely to entertain, and yet somehow it managed to achieve all of these roles and we let it...habitual criminals like pete doherty should be treated as such. if the UN can sort out the mess of media and untie the hands of the british legal system then i am all for it.

BBWactress

Joined: 1/7/2007

Msg: 20 (view)

Being Spoiled.. Posted: 3/5/2008 2:26:29 AM
nah i'd be really uncomfortable with this scenario, it's not so much the 'spoiling' as the fact that this chap clearly can't afford to do it and therefore must be letting something else slide. if he is 'spoiling' your mate when he can't afford to, to me it means he is possibly quite insecure and feels the need to show affection in a materialistic way to buy affection. if that's true than at some point he is going to run out of funds or get himself into money trouble first then run out of funds....suddenly he is in a position where the normal rules of his relationship are affected and he can't continue...OK so i am becoming a little tangential but you see where i am going. i think it's perfectly normal to want to treat or spoil people...sometimes..if you see something you know someone is into or you fancy surprising someone...in past relationships i have always preferred mutuality one buys one day the other the next...hate all that split the bill business. if i go to the cinema with a chap i prefer..you get tickets I'll get munch. i remember going on date once with a chap who nearly fell off his chair when after finishing our first drink in the pub i said..my round what are you having...he was 36 and no woman had ever bought him a pint before. i find that really uncomfortable. if your mate likes this bloke she needs to have a chat early on...spoil by all means but don't leave yourself short

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