Your last sentence says it all. Kick your freind's ass to the side of the road.

Really? Why?

Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al:


We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

Here is a model separation agreement:

Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.

We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them).

We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street. You can have your beloved homeless, homeboys, hippies and illegal aliens. We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.

You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security.

We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N.. but we will no longer be paying the bill.

We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find.

You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any practicing doctors. We'll continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not a right. We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World.

We'll practice trickle down economics and you can give trickle up poverty your best shot. Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our flag.

Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you ANWAR which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.


Sincerely,

John J. Wall
Law Student and an American

P.S. Also, please take Barbara Streisand & Jane Fonda with you.

I mean how many people have gone out on a date from an online site, and it not be what you expected, yet you meet someone in the grocery store and think "I would have never picked him out on a web site."

When you find the number...pass it on, I got about a 1,000,000 to rat out.

6. There is a saying which I find myself quoting, "If you wish in one hand and $hit in the other, when hand will fill up first?"

Not everyone is photogenic and various reasons cause pics not to look so much like the real person. That is why I enjoy POF get togethers, you can meet them and gauge for yourself if there's an attraction!!

Sounds bloody cold........but, that's how it is done!!!

^^^Yeah, isn't that WEIRD?!?!

O.P. On LADIES Profiles... Walk on the beach.. No water in sight for miles and miles were they live.
Love the outdoors... Pictures on there profile have revealing outfits outside. Like in bathing suits, shorts, nice top.
They live right now, were it's middle of Jan and there not going outside in that. Why, (here the tricky part,) no photos of coats or outside in winter. NOT, ALL SOME.

Last: He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced.

He went to the KITCHEN to talk.

Now before we get all bent out of shape, the O.P. is asking "What is the most common phrase you see in a profile?" I don't read the MENS...So going by what you Ladies say.
There is great, not so great and some that just down right scare me.
So take whats posted with a grain of salt, unless YOU know the other poster. Alot don't. Still L.M.A.O.!! Alot get right to the point. Thumbs up to alot, still laughing at ALOT.

Yanno Loreli... I've never seen such a fantastic group of people in a single forum...

p.s. Thanks Lori.......I luv's ya right back!!

The husband had just finished reading a new book entitled, 'You Can Be the Man of Your House.'

He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced, 'From now on, you need to know that I am the man of this house and my word is law.

You will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, you will serve me a sumptuous dessert.

After dinner, you are going to go upstairs with me and we will have the kind of sex that I want.

Afterwards, you are going to draw me a bath so I can relax. You will wash my back and towel me dry and bring me my robe.

Then, you will massage my feet and hands.

Then tomorrow, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?


The wife replied, 'The f**kin' funeral director would be my first guess!!'

^^^^^ Pfftttttttttttt!!

I had a great time Tee!!! Thanks for having the "Shindig" and I really enjoyed it!!

~Sneaks

Got to be honest, folks-- the variety of new and fresh topics to discuss in this forum are getting mighty slim.

Girl, you are too much !!!!

This is in reply to "Nice Guy" I checked out your profile it say's your 26 on there and on your message here you said your 36 so which is it?

Ok, lets hear it from the women. What is your idea of a good man? What makes him one you would want? How much do looks have to do with it? Be honest. How much does Financial security matter to you? I am not talking about golddiggers, but his ability to support himself in a comfortable manner? ANd what would you say is comfortable? Would he have to have at least a house, and not a trailor. IF he doesnt have what you expect him to have given his age, does it matter why?What kind of guy could impact you enough to change your minds about certain criteria? What do you consider the prioritys in the quality of man you woudl want? Just curious.

Are my eyes deceiving me?…
Lost your mind hun?
Lord help you please!
Just look at what you’ve done!!

Not a place for such a fine lady
On the auctioning block.
Think you need to lie on the couch
And have a nice long talk with your doc!

A nice guy I thought you were…
Rethinking my opinion
After what you’ve done to her.


Shame, shame on you!
Too much time on your hands?
Nothing better to do?
Bored ole sneaky man.

Shocked! At what you did.
We all know what you’re up to
Confiscating all the bids.
Also,
I’m turning you in to DFACS
For the sake of your kids.

My words to you
Is just a waste of time.
You shameful man
Begging for pennies, nickels and dimes.

I’m not in the threads much
My posts are rare and few
But when something needs to be said
Saying it is exactly what I do.

Women, we stick together.
Messing with the lady’s friend?
My, my, thought you knew better.
Regrets? Oh, don’t you pretend!

You should beg forgiveness
You sneaky and mean ole one.
You’ve done it now
And it can’t be undone.


What will you do next?
OMG, I can only imagine…
More horrid and shameful actions
From a guy who is tetched!

Just don’t whine
And carry a torch.
If you can’t handle the heat
Then keep your butt on the porch!

Un-wad your panties,
Mr. Sneaky ole man.
My post is in response to
The last sentence from msg # 4,
Read it and you’ll understand.

OP it is as it is, accept it.

Maybe you should be asking yourself why you have wanted to marry three different ladies in a short space of time?

CHOCOLATE CAKE/CHOCOLATE ICING- Sexy, always ready to give and receive. Very creative, adventurous, ambitious and passionate. You have a cold exterior but are warm on the inside. Not afraid to take chances. Will not settle for anything average in life. Love to laugh.

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