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whatlure2use?

Joined: 2/7/2007

Msg: 1219 (view)

Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met? Posted: 4/5/2007 10:37:01 AM
BEERSHARK, I agree with every thing you have said. Perfectly There are two parts to the equation: The feeling of love and the logical part, the part that takes the time to see if you are on ENOUGH of the same pages in life to have a commitment. Yes, jumping into a commitment would be foolish just because you have the love feeling. Even if you met at work, party, gas station or on the computer. I think it comes in two ways: For some people the way it works is that they have met someone and as time has gone on they have found that they have many things in common and aim for the same goals and get along well ...etc... so eventually they find that they have fallen in love with that person. Logic and then love........thats cool. Others have fallen in love quickly and need to keep a slow pace to see if the logic part will cause them to make a commitment. THEN WE HAVE THOSE THAT GO HEAD ON FULL SPEED ELOPE TO VEGAS AND MARRY A PERSON JUST BECAUSE OF THE OVERWHELMING FEELING OF LOVE. THEN WE HAVEE THOSE THAT LET A GREAT PERSON WHO WOULD HAVE BEEN A PERFECT LIFE LONG PARTNER GET AWAY JUST BECAUSE IT THE BREATH TAKING KIND OF LOVE WASNT THERE........ Either way, Different strokes for different folks......... What ever works for you and brings you a smile and happiness more power to ya!

whatlure2use?

Joined: 2/7/2007

Msg: 59 (view)

Blue Cafe~+~ Long Beach ~+~ March 10 2007 Posted: 3/6/2007 12:35:19 AM
Sounds like fun. I have a wedding to attend at 4:00 then the reception following. I assume we will have to be out of there by 10:00. The wedding and reception will be in Reseda. I am not sure if that is just to late to come. I am not familiar with either area. I would like very much to come. I had a good time at the Sage Brush Cantina. If I do come I will be bringing a girl friend and meeting up with my buddy Marc who is suppose to be there. Shelly

whatlure2use?

Joined: 2/7/2007

Msg: 1210 (view)

Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met? Posted: 2/21/2007 10:38:45 PM
I know that it seems so easy to jump in the car and head out to meet someone and at another time it would have been. We met on the computer emailed once or twice, exchanged numbers and have never really done the computer thing again. We hit it off from the first phone call. We both had things going on at the time that kept us with very little free time and the free time didn't come at the same time. Three months of talking on the phone we became so close... We had set up some time to finally meet. Just before the planned meet we talked about how we felt for each other and how crazy that was... and then the subject of if it was this great after we meet then what? We already knew our schedules clashed. We would have little to no time to see each other. Then we talked about who would move and niether of us could move for numerous reasons. So we found ourselves afraid to meet at that time. More so, I was afraid to meet. I told him that I would only be his friend and that we would have to talk less often. I had tried a long distance relationship before. It is expensive and the time it takes from the things I have to do such as work,family and kids .... made things hard. I didnt want to say I have a man but still feel loneyly. It was the facts of our lifes that changed things for us. I have learned from the past and I know what I can and can't do. We were being honest with each other. Well, needless to say we still talked alot. But I just kept in mind that it was something that wasn't going to happen, not now. So I wanted to appreciate the friendship that had developed out of this fanasy phone relationship we seemed to have found ourselves in. Like I said time went by and we shared events and holidays, maybe on the phone but he and I still kept each other involved in things. If we were to have less responsiblities and commitments one of us would have moved in a heart beat. In fact we have set up a weekend for me to go and see him. It is a meet long over due but it will be done as friends. It will take place in March, third weekend. I am nervous and he is too. He dates others and so do I and we talk about them and give advice to each other. A BIG PART OF ALL OF THIS IS I AM SHY AND VERY INSECURE WITH MY APPEARENCE. So part of that time I was so afraid he would be dissappointed. I was afraid. Self projecting. Not much has changed except I am meeting him as a friend and not as a possible lover/partner.....So I am much more at ease with friends then a date.......If he is my true friend (which I believe he is) then he wont care what I look like. right?

whatlure2use?

Joined: 2/7/2007

Msg: 1202 (view)

Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met? Posted: 2/20/2007 9:27:01 PM
I would like to share my experience. I started talking to a man that lives almost four hours away. Not that far but far enough. In the very beginning we talked about all the what if's and how's... He nor I could move for yrs to come. Transfering was not an option. However, we enjoyed talking so much that we continued to talk daily or at least a few times a week. The feelings that you described we both stated we felt. Being mature enough to except that we could not go off of those feelings. Before I knew it we had been talking about a year and stilling living our own lifes. When my mother passed away he was constantly leaving messages and calling me to see how I was. Not one of the men I knew in person did that. Most didn't even call one time. At some point we would say I love you but not like I am in love with you but just that we had come to a place that we felt love for the friendship that had developed and never allowing the attraction to be denied but not allowing it to change the closeness we developed. He and I would share our dates with each other and would laugh at the craziness of the dating world at our age. You may ask why we didn't make the time to meet, well we were both afraid that in the event of a meet that what we shared would not be there in person or that it would be there and then what?, we are in love and can't see each other often because of distance, work and committments. I have been single long enough to know I don't want to have a long distance relationship not for long at least. We shared things and understood things that no one even cared to ask about. I have never been that close to anyone. It's been almost two yrs now. We have made a balance and love our friendship that will always be. We are going to meet but as friends and only friends. I am happy that we were open enough to know what we felt and mature enough to know the facts. I would say to you, becareful because it's true that meeting someone in person can change everything you ever felt on the phone. It could inhance it or it could be an experience you will want to forget ASAP. So meet and find out cuz you don't want to miss out on something great. Or waste your time on something that was not real. Either way take away experience from this sitiuation and use it in a possitive way with your next experience. I wish you luck.

whatlure2use?

Joined: 2/7/2007

Msg: 150 (view)

Our aging bodies Posted: 2/18/2007 9:51:31 PM
I really like what A mr Reeee had to say. I agree that for women there are somethings that age will take its toll on and only surgery will place them back where they started from. For men, thinning hair or hair loss is something that they have to face and if they are not comfortable with shaving their head then they have to live with it. Things like this is just how its going to be. I have dealt with up and down weight issues. I kept hearing others talking about a life change not dieting but somehow I kept dieting..... mistake. But then after my mother past away in April of 2006 I began to rethink about what I was putting into my body, my age and my future. I joined a gym in November, stopped drinking soda and stopped blameing the fast food places for me not being able to fight the urge to visite them four times a week. I started off slowly but have found that the gym is on my schedule each day now and I never hear mcdonalds calling my name any more. I am more aware of my bodies needs. I sleep better and others are starting to notice the change in my body. I have had a life style change for the better. I also had to be honest, I am more attracted to men that go to the gym regularly or who plays sports regularly. Yet I wasn't living the sort of life that would attract men like that. We need to be as healthy as we can be. But God knows I will need alot of forgiveness from the man that gets with me....lol As I will be forgiveing to him.

whatlure2use?

Joined: 2/7/2007

Msg: 51 (view)

is it true or bulls**t that life begins at 40? Posted: 2/18/2007 9:19:31 PM
Let me share my thoughts on life in the 40's. For me when I turned 40 I didnt go through the oh no not another birthday mood... like I did in my 30's. Somehow, for whatever reason my 40's gave me a since of peace and ease that I didnt have at any other age. It is not easy being single in my 40's, many men in California are more interested in much younger women so it limits my options. But there are so many great things in my life and where I am that I wouldnt change my age. My body my looks....lol yes....but not my age. But in the mean time, enjoy whatever age you are. Each era holds something great, dont miss out on it.

whatlure2use?

Joined: 2/7/2007

Msg: 193 (view)

Long hair on older women Posted: 2/18/2007 9:07:17 PM
I am going to be 45 in May. I have long hair. I have had almost every length of hair through out my life. I find that I am most comfortable with long hair. But I have told family and friends if the day comes that I look silly wearing it long they must tell me. It is so curly and when I am going to straighten it takes along time. But with the length I can wear it curly and clip it up and it will still have the length I am comfortable with.... I guess the key word is comfotable........if you are comfortable with it then its fine.

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