Long Story, Not Looking for Sympathy, Just Advice chat & forums.

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Thread: Long Story, Not Looking for Sympathy, Just Advice

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 29 (view)

Long Story, Not Looking for Sympathy, Just Advice Posted: 7/19/2007 10:49:55 AM
Your wife sounds like a man I was dating. He was completely hung up on his ex, even tho she had moved out for the 8th time. She got him into trouble and also said he beat her when it was she who beat him. I tried to show him that there are still nice women out here, who would treat him the way he should be treated, but no matter what I did or said, it didn't make any difference. We talk every night on net for hours, but after spending a beautiful weekend together, he decides he doesn't want to hurt me until he decides whether or not if given the opportunity, he would go back with her again. Needless to say, I was very hurt. My advice to you is to go and never look back. This woman has no intention of staying with you, she is only playing games. She comes and goes because you allow her too. I know it will be hard for you. Don't let her drag you down, you deserve better. Good luck,,,

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 21 (view)

I'm confused Posted: 7/19/2007 5:50:29 AM
He has been living with his daughter. She finally told the court she had moved out, so he is getting the paperwork now so he can move back in. I plan on letting him go, he seems to thrive on drama. She has come and gone 8 times. She did this because he allows her to do it. Don't worry, I plan on moving on. He talks to me very night on the net until midnight or later. Not sure why. But I don't plan on waiting around for him. And when it blows up in his face again down the road, I will just say "I told you so".

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 15 (view)

I'm confused Posted: 7/17/2007 5:19:46 AM
Thanks for the advice, you are absolutly right. We can't be taken advantage of unless we allow ourselves to be. Funny, thats the same advice I gave to him about him always taking his ex g/f back. I guess i should follow my own advice eh?

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 12 (view)

I'm confused Posted: 7/17/2007 4:37:32 AM
Thanks for the advise, the body rub sounds wonderful. Why is it that good people always finish last, when it comes to relationships?

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

I'm confused Posted: 7/16/2007 6:25:42 PM
This morning the whole situation hit home and I sat down and had a good cry. Buy I don't intend to keep the door open for him, as I feel used and told him so last night. He insisted he wasn't using me, but somehow I just don't believe him. Anyway I've taken off for a couple of days to clear my head, so I can think straight again. Already I feel much better.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

I'm confused Posted: 7/16/2007 11:45:22 AM
I have been seeing this guy who has just come out of a bad relationship. She has come and gone from his life 8 times. The trouble is he still might take her back. She charged him with assault, but it was her who assaulted him. He can't even get into his own house, cause she won't tell the courts that she is not living there any more. We had a nice time together, but now he wants to be alone to think things out, after we got involved. I told him he is setting himself up for future heartbreak and he agrees with me, but still can't seem to let go. He wants me to leave the door open for him, just in case. I agreed I would keep talking to him on the net. Everyone has told him to let her go.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 7 (view)

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY Posted: 5/13/2007 4:05:31 AM
Just want to wish all mothers Happy Mothers Day!

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 20 (view)

teeth? Posted: 5/12/2007 8:23:08 PM
A gap in your teeth doesn't bother me. It's rotten teeth and bad breath that I don't like.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Funny pet stories Posted: 5/12/2007 1:50:38 PM
Most of us have pets that we treat like members of our families. My siamese cat loves to crawl into my basket of clean laundry right out of the dryer and bury herself in it. It's too cute for words. I'd like to hear some of your stories about your pets.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 58 (view)

Caucasian Women + Indian Guys Posted: 4/11/2007 7:09:03 PM
No one here has mentioned Native Americans. I am very much into their culture and beliefs. They are a very spiritual people. I dated a man from the Mohawk tribe and found him to be a very kind and considerate man. Even though it didn't work as far as us being a couple, we are still friends.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 64 (view)

when your signifigant other wants to spend an occasional weekend away on their own Posted: 4/11/2007 6:36:47 PM
ROFLMAO I think you are way off base here reverend. It is a matter of trust on both parties.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 33 (view)

people who work in retail Posted: 4/10/2007 6:06:41 AM
One time a customer approached me and told me he had been watching me work around on the floor, and started flirting with me. I didn't mind the flirting, but he kept touching my arm all the time he was talking, plus he reeked of alcohol. I told him I had a boyfriend already. Another employee saw what was happening and came over to help. He told her to go away. I finally had to walk away from him, but if he had kept it up, I would have had to call security. Customers seem to think they can change store rules to suit themselves. They also think we keep every price of every item in the store in our heads. We have "price checkers" in several areas of the store for customers to check their own prices, but they don't look for them. Also when we are helping other customers, some one else comes along and butts in and expects you to help them right away. If we tell them to hang on for a sec, we are busy, we will get to them in a sec, some walk away in a huff. BE PATIENT people, we will help you. For many years customer washrooms were downstairs. Due to renovations in the store over a YEAR ago, the washrooms are now on the main floor, with signs directing you to them. Signs were posted on the door to the downstairs telling customers where the new washrooms are, and yet to this date some still come downstairs. We feel like yelling at them, "can't you read signs??????????"

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 58 (view)

when your signifigant other wants to spend an occasional weekend away on their own Posted: 4/10/2007 5:30:39 AM
Glad you picked up on that point like2hike, a lot of others didn't. They live an hour apart, she works, and he is home all day, as he is on a disability pension. The weekends are the only time they have together. As the casual observer (I don't interfere) it would seem to me that he could do whatever he wanted through the week. But that is just my opinion. It's true that he does keep in touch with her while he is away. He is an ex truck driver and used to long periods on the road away from home, and now can no longer do that. Personally, if I was in that situation, I wouldn't like it, but that is just my opinion.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

when your "signifigant other" wants to spend an occasional weekend away on their own Posted: 4/7/2007 3:36:38 PM
A friend of mine has been seeing someone for several months and they seem serious about each other. Occasionally he will spend a weekend away from her pursuing his own interests. They do not live together and because of work etc only see each other on weekends. He says that she is free to do the same thing. He claims to love her and wants a future with her. What do you think of this situation? She believes that he doing what he says, he even calls her from where he is. She has call display, so she knows he is not lying to her.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 28 (view)

Widows/Widowers - When is it too soon and...... Posted: 4/5/2007 6:44:54 AM
There is no time limit to the grieving process. My husband passed away Sept./2001 from cancer. I have been involved with some nice men since then but as soon as things got too serious I backed off, guess I was afraid of having to lose them to death again. Now I am involved with someone again, and feel like I am ready to take it to the next level, and we are making plans for the future. My advice for people in my situation is to take things slowly, and if it is right you will know it. We need time to get over what happened, and only you will know when it is right. Now I am ready to move on.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 44 (view)

What made you decide to end it? Posted: 4/5/2007 6:01:10 AM
Let me see, cheating, drugs and alcohol abuse come to mind. I was also involved with someone who molested my then 4 year old daughter. Needless to say I got out of there quick. How about a control freak who used the Bible to his own advantage.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 273 (view)

controlling men!!! Posted: 3/30/2007 5:44:49 AM
People who like to control others have very low self esteem, and that is their way of making themselves feel good. I was involved with one once, got out of it as quick as i could. No one has the right to control another. It would take too long to list all the stuff he tried to make me do. Best thing I ever did was leave!

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 23 (view)

Why put multiple pictures of their pets in their profile Posted: 3/30/2007 5:27:17 AM
I see nothing wrong with posting pictures of pets. I too am an animal lover, and would prefer someone who also enjoys animals.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 33 (view)

Funny Names For Kids Posted: 3/28/2007 5:49:20 PM
When I was younger I had a friend who had a twin brother and sister named Jack and Jill.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 67 (view)

how do you know if someone may be Bi-polar? Posted: 3/28/2007 5:36:59 PM
My son has bi polar, and with the help of his medication and a loving wife is doing very well. He is a college graduate and holds down a full time job in a hospital. He has 2 young children and is a very good father to them. At one point he did go off his meds and it didn't work. Now he has found the right one and is doing very well. He was not diagnosed until he was an adult, so now his behavior as a child makes sense. People with this disorder can do very well with the right medication, and the help of a loving family.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 12 (view)

HELP Posted: 3/26/2007 3:29:24 PM
Sounds to me like he is moving on, I suggest you do the same. Anyone who puts an add in the personals isn't looking for friends, he is looking for a new girlfriend. I know it will be hard for you, but i suggest you start looking for someone who really deserves you. You sound like a nice person and you don't deserve to be treated like this. Good luck to you.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 26 (view)

twin baby names Posted: 3/22/2007 7:32:14 PM
When I was young, a friend of mine had twin brother and sister, their names were Jack and Jill (I'm not joking) Good luck and congratulations!

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 20 (view)

people who work in retail Posted: 3/19/2007 5:51:08 AM
Thanks everyone who wrote in here, great stuff, keep venting .........

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

people who work in retail Posted: 3/16/2007 5:55:52 AM
I work for a very large, well known retailer and come in contact with customers all day. As everyone knows, we have to keep smiling no matter what the customer says or does. Here is a place for you to vent. Tell about your customers, what they say, and what they do, to p... you off. It is unbelievable what people can say or do, to get their own way. Go ahead, vent..........

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 131 (view)

Pick Your Fish Type. Posted: 3/16/2007 5:45:36 AM
I think defining what the fish mean is a good idea. Someone in here suggested coral, even tho it's not a fish. That's me.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 14 (view)

Help Posted: 3/13/2007 4:06:32 AM
Update - Thanks to everyone who has written here and shown their concern, especially Furtherfarthest. I should have mentioned that we do not live together, we live in different cities, about 1 hour apart. We would get together most weekends. We had a lengthy conversation on the phone last night. He is still not drinking, been sober approx. 10 months, thanks to AA. He has also got a new prescription for a different pain drug and is now off the other one. This new drug is just on the market and he says it is working very well.It is also non-narcotic. The Doctor who prescribed the other drug that he took for pain for many years should be held accountable for his addiction to it. I am sure he will go through withdrawal from the other drug. I don't know what the future will hold, I just wanted to give everyone an update.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 10 (view)

Help Posted: 3/12/2007 4:34:09 AM
To Furtherfarthest, thank you for your posting. He fits the list almost 100%. I tried to contact you via email, but it wouldn't accept it. Thank you for trying to help, I will certainly take everything you said to heart.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

When you lose your spouse to death Posted: 3/11/2007 12:02:28 PM
I am a widow, who lost a great husband to cancer, on Sept.7, 2001. The day of his funeral was 9/11. We knew his death was coming, but it was still very hard to deal with it when the time came. The reason I am writing this is I would like others in the same situation to tell of their experience and how it has affected their lives since, especially when it comes to starting a new relationship. I know how difficult it was for me. I have been back in the dating scene for a while now, and even though I've met some very nice men, and some not so nice, no one seems to want commitment any more. Please tell me about what you have been through, and how you handled the situation.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 4 (view)

Help Posted: 3/11/2007 11:35:30 AM
Thanks for your reply, but I don't really think you understand the problem. He is now in a panic because he can't get his drug for pain any more.If I mentioned the name of the drug, I'm sure you would recognize it. He says he will take another one, but I know he is addicted to the one he is on. He has been on it for at least 10 years, and it is very additive. He is making things up in his head about me, which are not true. I am keeping my distance from him, because he needs to get his life straightened out, and I know there is nothing i can do to help him.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 63 (view)

players and your opinions please Posted: 3/11/2007 8:37:45 AM
You don't have a picture, does that mean you are one too.???????

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 109 (view)

It's Over When Posted: 3/11/2007 8:19:24 AM
This is great advice, thanks for posting it.

freespirit468

Joined: 3/7/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Help Posted: 3/11/2007 6:34:26 AM
Recently I started going out with a man that I dated several years ago. He was an alcoholic , but I didn't realize it until it was too late. So I walked away from him. Emotionally we had a real connection. Over time he tried to get me back, but I refused. This past Christmas he told me he had started AA, and had been sober for several months at that time. He wanted me back again, so I decided to give it one more try. Everything was great for the first little while, then almost overnight things changed. Back in the early 90's he was in a very bad work related accident, and has been taking a very powerful pain relieving drug ever since for chronic pain. Now the problem begins. Several months ago his Doctor told him he was retiring and he would have to find a new Doctor. Well so far he hasn't been able to find one, and as soon as he mentions the name of the drug, they all say they can't help him. Now he has until the end of this month, and no more drug. Now he is picking fights with me, saying horrible nasty things to me that are not true, and finding ways to stay away from me. He makes me feel guilty, and I have to live on eggshells in case I say something to set him off. I'm tired of this, and I know i don't deserve it. But we both have strong feelings for each other, and had talked getting together on a more permanent basis. While all these problems exist, it will never happen. I don't want to live on an emotional roller coaster, this is not my idea of living. All of this has made me feel really bad, and I hurt inside real bad some days. I would like your thoughts.

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