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Thread: Please help me refine my social skills

Joined: 3/8/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

Please help me refine my social skills Posted: 3/15/2007 11:06:16 PM
First of all, many thanks to the people who have responded so far. I agree, my sense of style IS rather limited to uniforms of one kind or another. Time for some pictures and new clothes. And one burning question I haven't yet asked is about attraction - I see these ads for ATTRACTING women all the time, but never good, solid, well proven methods of building a relationship. I agree with some of the earlier posts (well, all of them so far) in the sense that I DO want to have many friends, but only ONE mate. And the games aren't designed to funnel me in that direction. I admit that I have some self - defeating behaviours that I'm just gonna have to buckle down and eliminate - especially when it comes to clothes. If there are any women in the DFW area reading this, and they want to help me work on my style, I'm willing to spring for dinner in exchange for some clothing shopping time. Seriously. Oh, I may not buy anything based solely on your sugesstion, but it WILL push me out of my comfort zone and into improvement. I will also be looking for that book aether suggested. Oh and the leather bomber and fedora.....you know, I like that idea. Maybe I'll be a good sport and take an Indy picture just for grins........ Glab

Joined: 3/8/2007

Msg: 6 (view)

Please help me refine my social skills Posted: 3/14/2007 8:54:07 PM
Hey guys. Sly, kissed - thanks for your input. I sat down and pretended I was telling the woman of my dreams how I felt - not writing a treatsie on Alzheimer's. I may have gone overboard on this, but I REALLY feel a lot better about my new profile than the old. Casual people may not get a lot of it, but I think people who are in tune with deper things in life will "hear" my passions, my honesty, my Id if you will a lot clearer this time. And really, this is how I WANT to communicate with my spouse. Through beatutiful things, not the cold shell of reality every day. Thanks guys, I will also be taking some new pictures, and I would appreciate it if you would glance over my new work and give me your feedback. I realize that this is a work-in-progress, and there is ALWAYS room for improvement. Glabby

Joined: 3/8/2007

Msg: 5 (view)

Please help me refine my social skills Posted: 3/14/2007 8:19:06 PM
Thanks kissed. I admit, I think I put to much "thought" into my profile instead of "feeling". The web thing just seems so sterile sometimes, and I admit I'd rather be "emotional" in person; but hey, this is a learning process for me and I am enjoying the journey. I'll take a little time to research this and think about what you and Sly said, then write afresh. Thanks a lot!

Joined: 3/8/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

Please help me refine my social skills Posted: 3/13/2007 11:20:04 PM
Thanks a lot bro. I will do some thinking about this, and re-write my profile after I get more of an idea of what characteristics I want to put out there. Thanks for your time and advice Glabby

Joined: 3/8/2007

Msg: 1380 (view)

Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all? Posted: 3/13/2007 1:58:51 AM
Well, yes I have met women with no picture, and I won't do it again. Here's my reasons WHY. I have dated women larger than what I find attractive before, but I am really working hard on my own body, for health reasons. If you are my FRIEND, I really don't care, as I accept you for who you are. But in order for me to have a lover/long term relationship, I HAVE to be attracted to you. It might be a little shallow, I agree, but if there's no chemistry, there's no chemistry. I also want someone who is going to take care of themselves at least moderately. I don't need a supermodel, but I DO want someone who has the same or greater fitness goals than I do. And like all of the women who meet men that aren't quite what they say they are, I have experienced the same with women. So, from now on, no. I want someone I have a sexual attraction to, that I can be attracted to forever, because that's the kind of marriage I want - forever. We have different standards for those we accept as friends and those we screen as mates. That's just life.

Joined: 3/8/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Please help me refine my social skills Posted: 3/13/2007 1:30:40 AM
OK, this is an honest askance for some assistance. Since I don't know ANY of you folks yet, I felt it was pretty safe to ask for honest criticism and actually get an honest set of answers. I am a really intense person, and I just don't have it in myself to play the "bad boy" to impress women. Also, I am now working towards avoiding the "f" word - friends. I have never been succesful being a womans' "friend" first. I usually find myself stuck there. Ok, that was the nutshell version. I am asking for some guidance from the rest of the community because I want to improve my social skills. I am a good man, and I have several traits that are positive, and a few that are not so positive; I know that I am a good man, and that I love my son, take care of responsibilities, listen to people, am emotionally available, etc. I have confidence, and am in pretty good shape. I have a good job, and am improving my career. What's my problem, you think? Simple. I need to refine my "dating" skills. I would like guidance from you guys, both men and women, in how to approach, attract, and interact with women, without having to be false or play too many games. I know dating IS a game, and I just need some help from those who are succesful to please guide me into a winning skill set. I am ready to change what I do to become sucessful and happy. And a one night stand is NOT my goal. I want to get better at attracting the long-term kind of women so I can be appropriately picky in narrowing down who is a good mate. I will be happy to answer pertinent questions in regards to this topic, and please feel free to read my profile here and the one at e-harmony.com (glabrezu there too). Thank you all, and my deepest appreciation in advance.

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