single for too long?? chat & forums.

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Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 20 (view)

single for too long?? Posted: 10/1/2007 4:09:51 PM
I read the forums alot and see many different topics. Some I simply find amusement. Some I find just a distraction from being bored. This particular topic hit more close to heart than I wish to admit. I've been divorced for almost 17 years now. I've had some relationships along the way. 2 years at best. I have the ability to remain friends with anyone that I've been involved with. I think this is partly due to the fact that I have built up such a protective mechinism that I can feel to a certain extent, but I don't allow myself to get close enough to feel pain. I've spent many a night trying to figure this all out, and wonder if HE did come along, could I let the walls be broken and believe again????? As I wonder though life, making myself believe that I don't need anyone to be happy, I watch people, sometimes just walking together, or a couple driving in the car together and I wonder. Is this something I'll ever have? And will I be able to handle if it happens? Will I be able to commit to someone for the long term and will I be able/allow the self preservation that has simply just developed to be broken down. To many questions that I still can't answer myself I do hope that you all find the peace, love and happiness that we all do want, even if we can't seem to find. Perhaps someone will come along with a bowling ball upside the head for all the right reasons.

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 28 (view)

He won't leave me alone Posted: 7/24/2007 4:57:01 PM
OP, Good luck to any man that gets involved with you. I'm not saying that this man with a completely broken heart is right for stalking you, but you did give him the shaft. Seems to me that you led him on with all the stages that the "relationship" went though from the first kiss to the moving in and all that in between. Can't help but think with this post that we do, as females, deserve the game playing bashing we get.

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 18 (view)

So lost... need advice Posted: 7/24/2007 3:15:36 PM
Dahmesmn, 1. Always remember "The last perfect person died on the cross". This always helps me when I beat myself up due to any error in judgment. We are imperfect which is what makes us great. It's those that put themselves on false pedestals that judge. You should never live in judgment for an isolated error. If someone truly loves you for strengths and the occasional weakness then they will forgive and forget. Be proud of who you are and what your about. Your children will have a better chance of following the path you set and become beautiful and confident people if they are exposed to people in their Mom's life who love and support her, not degrade and humiliate her. As far as Randy54156 goes... Check out the profile.... Always look at the source of critism and then feel sorry for them. Best of peace and luck.

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 142 (view)

Do We Like To Be Waken Up For Sex In The Middle Of The Night? Posted: 7/13/2007 5:06:49 PM
If I'm absolutely attracted to the one I'm with, then it can an incredible and intensely beautiful experience. The half awake/half asleep daze makes it even more erotic. But on the same token I have had relationships that just plainly fizzled out over time and hence the sexual attraction declined then it does become annoying. It really all does come to the level of sexual connection that you have.

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 27 (view)

Have you ever been your own worst enemy? Posted: 7/4/2007 7:25:20 AM
Gosh you have my name, except add one more year to the date Regardless of how great this man may have seemed if a quick witted sense of humor scared him, then it's best to let him go. You would eventually be unhappy not being your true self!!! You should want to be with somebody that appreciates your humor and laughs with you. I often find that life in general gives me great ammunition to poke fun (perhaps a wee bit sarcastically), but I can laugh at myself just as well. Remember, you'll live longer when you laugh every day and I think a dry sense of humor is a clear sign of higher intelligence.

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 14 (view)

Does my profile sound too bitter or do I get a point across Posted: 7/3/2007 1:58:39 PM
Personally, I found the profile not only refreshing, but even though there is a bit of distance, someone I would absolutely find stimulating conversation with. You are clearly a man of intelligence, THANK GOD not the boring kind. You brought back some memories of the crucifixion in the jar of urine. Great debate we had in my fine art class. I actually changed my distance limits as seems my location has not shown me the intellectual depth that is across this nations. Fabulous Job!!!

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 619 (view)

Class action against Yahoo Personals and Match.com for fraud Posted: 7/3/2007 10:19:51 AM
This is happening to me right now with True.com. I get the stupid winks all the time since I closed my account. These folks are obnoxious. I'm not even remotely tempted to ever reactivate my account, especially since the selection was marginal at best. Personally, I think the whole wink idea is dumb. If you don't have the intelligence to spark my interest with something witty or catchy an impersonal and wimpy wink is not going to work.

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 60 (view)

13 First Date Tips for Men Posted: 6/27/2007 10:44:39 AM
sock Puppeteer, I have tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. I may very well print this out, just when I need some hysterics during the day. You are fabulous, really. Keep up the humor, think after reading these forums we need far more of it.

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 71 (view)

Married and Looking? Posted: 6/20/2007 5:02:25 AM
To the OP, If you find the next comment a "bashing" it only because it might be hitting home. The phone book has many listings for professionals that would be more than happy to help you find the answer to your relationship (or lack there of) issues. There are also a number of Attorneys that may be of service as well. My general opinion of "Married" status FISHING on this sight (to which I do believe is a "Single Dating" sight (could be wrong) is purely that they are predators. As others have sited there are sights for people in the Married situation that are far better suited for each others and don't muddy up a sight for people in search of honest and real relationship potential.

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 70 (view)

Married and Looking? Posted: 6/20/2007 4:52:10 AM
It's called Passive Resitance. Most of us woman have the guts, stamina, intelligence and tenacity to make a decision as opposed to letting other make them for us. It's also called being a strong, proud independent woman, who can not only provide the real, love and support that our children need, but also teaches our children what is acceptable and not acceptable in life. I truly hope my children do not decide to stay in a marriage that is unhealthy for them and all those around them. I also hope that they do not justify being immoral, because they have "needs" that are not being met. We should all set the example of what we want our children to be or not to be.

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 56 (view)

Married and Looking? Posted: 6/19/2007 2:49:37 PM
There is one more choice that you have neglected to mention, but I will be happy to help you and even went so far as to get the exact definition. You see this may help to keep the vows once made. Main Entry: eu·nuch Pronunciation: 'yü-n&k, -nik Function: noun Etymology: Middle English eunuk, from Latin eunuchus, from Greek eunouchos, from eunE bed + echein to have, have charge of -- more at SCHEME 1 : a castrated man placed in charge of a harem or employed as a chamberlain in a palace Ya, won't miss the "sex" part at all. Oh, and as far as "those you care about", you assume I meant the other spouse in question, when what I actually meant by those who suffer in the aftermath, shamed children, shamed parents, disapointed friends and not doubt a many, many more.

Oceandawn1965

Joined: 4/23/2007

Msg: 53 (view)

Married and Looking? Posted: 6/19/2007 2:13:30 PM
As a rookie on POF, I must admit I get totally disgusted when someone views me that has a "Married" description. It feels, to a certain extent, that I've been violated by someone that is clearly very creepy. I once sent an e-mail to someone and asked did he truly want to destroy peoples lives, people he may love and care about, not to mention gullable females who could only be looking for possibilities and affection. I'd wager a guess that the success rate of happiness in their quest is less than marginal. Personnally, I believe these people waste the oxygen for the far more deserving on this planet. People who truly care for others instead of their own self absorbed life. Harsh, the truth can hurt, but better than the pain and aftermath that others who believed in them will ultimately face.

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