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 Author Thread: smell me
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 32 (view)
 
smell me
Posted: 11/2/2009 10:28:40 AM

lmao about the dutch oven comment Well I tried it out, and as I expected I didn't really notice anything out of the ordinary

Well, if the "dutch oven" scent didn't seem out of the ordinary, perhaps we have pinpointed the problem right there!
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Know how to have fun?
Posted: 8/24/2009 3:11:57 PM

catching minnows and frogs with the kids and grandkids. Eating.

The minnows and frogs, the kids and grandkids, or both?
OT: Making smart-ass posts.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Grrrrrr squirrels
Posted: 8/18/2009 10:59:01 AM
I had the same thing happen when I started talking to a woman from here and she mentioned that she had dry hands and used hand lotion quite often. I giggled and said "It rubs the lotion on its skin. It does this whenever it is told", over and over again. After I yelled "It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again!", she said she had another call and would call me back. She never did. Bïtch.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 14 (view)
 
I sneeze you say Bless you.
Posted: 7/15/2009 10:51:57 AM
I usually say "Gesundheit".
I like that word because it sounds like German for "virgin".
If you don't say bless you when someone sneezes, then how will you stop the evil spirits from invading their body?
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Anyway to keep cats from biting electric cords?
Posted: 7/2/2009 5:09:56 AM
Cats hate molasses. Paint the entire cord with a thick coating of molasses with a basting brush and they will leave it alone.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Tony Hawk Ruining America?
Posted: 6/24/2009 5:10:28 AM

How does fox news even exist.

You spelled it wrong, it should be spelled "faux".
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Who would win?
Posted: 6/19/2009 10:48:42 AM
No contest - only one of those men was able to pull out a single hair from his beard and skewer three men through the heart with it. Chuck Norris.
And of course, he is the only person alive who IS allowed to talk about Fight Club.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 11 (view)
 
you think its bad a woman over 50 has a toy boy
Posted: 6/2/2009 11:06:23 AM

im being called a cougher girl

It might help if you quit smoking.

Well you're spelling is not very good to begin with.

And your use of homophones is not much better.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 33 (view)
 
reading forum posts
Posted: 5/21/2009 10:46:01 AM
I didn't have time to read the OP or the replies.
I just wanted to express my outrage at things that go on.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Bravery...
Posted: 5/20/2009 10:45:55 AM

No...he used the medical term...starts with a 'v'

Ahhh! Vajayjay!
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Big Gay Louis'
Posted: 5/12/2009 10:55:38 AM
We used to have a hotel here in Winnipeg called The Gay Cavalier Motor Hotel.
Not sure if anyone went in there expecting to meet happy gentlemen trained in arms and horsemanship though.
They have since renamed the establishment.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
A question for head Shavers.......
Posted: 5/3/2009 9:03:49 PM
Always in the shower - using either bar soap or occasionally shaving cream. I find I get a closer shave with bar soap. I only use a Gillette Sensor Excel, only twin blades. I do NOT find that more blades improves the shave. I shave almost exclusively against the grain, and shave a lot by feel - i.e. running my hand over the shaved area until I feel no hair. Think I have cut myself about twice in 8 years or so, both times I was rushing. Works for me...
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 24 (view)
 
instant messenger
Posted: 4/28/2009 5:59:16 PM
*cowboy* - I tried to send you an instant message to find out where the answer is for this question, but it is not working. Can you help?
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Mom throws daughters out of car and drives off
Posted: 4/23/2009 10:44:57 AM

She left them at Post Road and South Broadway, an area of shops and offices 3 miles from their home, then drove off, the police report said.

Three whole miles? Hell, we had to walk that far, uphill both ways in the snow with only plastic bags on our feet, to get to school every day when I was a kid.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Prophesies and Predictions
Posted: 4/8/2009 9:02:12 PM
Barney will take over the world and reveal his true nature.
I can prove it! This was discovered in ancient Latin scrolls!

1) What is Barney?
CUTE PURPLE DINOSAUR

2) Change all U's to V's (which is proper Latin anyway):
CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR

3) Extract all Roman Numerals:
C V V L D I V

4) Convert into Arabic values:
100 5 5 50 500 1 5

5) Add all the numbers:
666

It's true - Barney is The Beast!
It's in Revelations people!
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
'IRONY' It happens when you are not looking.why?
Posted: 4/8/2009 10:24:35 AM

I have been relaxed , calm...and on medication

Have you considered upping the dose a bit?
Also - are you one of those people who think that "a traffic jam when you're already late" is ironic? A pox on Alanis!
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 22 (view)
 
What Is The First Thing You Say To A Girl?
Posted: 4/1/2009 10:14:11 AM

When you approach girls, what's the first thing that typically comes out of your mouth?

My tongue and some saliva?
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Help me out guys?
Posted: 3/30/2009 10:56:23 AM
I think that you should contact your Human Resources department and report this cad for the use of this heinous phrase. If this type of thing is allowed to go on, soon people will be bombarding others with other equally hateful phrases like "See you later" or "May you live long and prosper".
Better to nip it in the bud now.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Some of the most STUPID things guy's say,,,Why?
Posted: 3/30/2009 10:25:28 AM

THE guy ponders over the wine list and then asks the drinks waitress :Do you have any leg opener wine?

I am guessing there was no lemon gin on the menu?
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 44 (view)
 
Helpful hints....whats yours?
Posted: 3/27/2009 11:49:07 AM

Be weary of woman who cooks carrots and peas in same pot

Confucius say: Jokes involving homophones work better when spoken than when written.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
Why Decimal? / Denary?
Posted: 3/20/2009 10:23:21 AM

All hail base-11

All your base are belong to us.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
What happened to sidewalks? Share the road?
Posted: 3/18/2009 8:47:48 PM

So far in 2009, in my town, there has been 150+ people hit by cars because they were walking in the road. You think people would learn...

If not, you will just have to wait a few generations for natural selection to start kicking in.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 122 (view)
 
Not criminally responsible?
Posted: 3/17/2009 6:14:56 PM

This is a place for opinions. That was mine. I have mine, you have yours - and I'm not bashing you for your cowardly inclinations, am I?

It is indeed a place for opinions, and I expressed my opinion of yours.
However, though I was challenging your idea, you chose to bash me for doing so by resorting to an ad hominem attack - suggesting I was a coward and permanently single.
If you had bothered to investigate a bit, you might have noticed that I am in fact not single, nor have I been recently. Strangely enough, I managed to find a wonderful lady who does not subscribe to the Rambo school of conflict resolution.
Every time a situation arises like this, there is always an element (who of course were safely at home at the time) who go on about how they would have taken down the knife wielding lunatic if they had been in that situation. Yeah, right.
Mind you, perhaps that might be a good idea. Let the natural selection process take care of things.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 115 (view)
 
Not criminally responsible?
Posted: 3/16/2009 6:32:43 PM

What I'd REALLY like to see is for everyone on that bus who did nothing to do a year or so in prison.

Exactly! What we should be doing is giving everyone a large hunting knife as they enter the bus. That would even the odds a bit. They could also give out some PCP to approximate the mental state of the attacker so it would be a more even fight. Then, anyone who has no blood on their knife after the attack could be sent to prison forever!
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 85 (view)
 
Not criminally responsible?
Posted: 3/13/2009 10:31:38 AM
I think that the quote below is a good explanation of what NCR means (from http://www.mhcva.on.ca/MHP/mhpfor4.htm)
Although black and white thinking can be easier on the brain, very little in the world is black and white. It is possible that Li may re-offend in the future. It is also possible that you may develop schizophrenia and cause someone harm. Should we lock you up preemptively?

It has long been a principle of Canadian law that in order for a person to be guilty of an offence they must have had the intent to commit the offence. The law has to have some latitude for true accidents. Part of having the intent is the ability to have the intent.

The law approaches this from the perspective that the individual has to be capable of appreciating the nature of the act or of knowing that it is wrong. The law allows for a person to be found Not Criminally Responsible due to Mental Disorder of an offence if they are suffering from a mental disorder of a nature that makes them incapable of appreciating the nature of the act or knowing that what they did was wrong.

In Canada, Section 16 of the Criminal Code used to be written that a person was found 'Not Guilty By Reason of Insanity'. This section, however, was recently re-written to embody the concept of 'Not Criminally Responsible'. The previous version of the law made it possible that a person was not necessarily the perpetrator of the offence i.e Not Guilty. However, with the change, it must first be demonstrated that the person is the perpetrator of the act but not responsible under the law because of mental disorder i.e. Not Criminally Responsible.

A person who has been found Not Criminally Responsible will not be absolutely discharged until they are deemed no longer a risk to public safety. Fortunately, many persons suffering psychotic disorders can be successfully rehabilitated with medications and/or psychosocial rehabilitation or other therapeutic interventions and successfully returned to their community without posing further hazards.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Watches and superstition
Posted: 3/6/2009 10:18:59 AM
Boy, that would be a cool option to get on a watch - I am sure Timex is working on it.
Who needs sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads?
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Older man, younger woman, and loud sex
Posted: 3/3/2009 10:20:32 AM

man much older suddenly feel strange having sex with someone so much younger if the voice screaming in their ear sounded almost “barley legal”?

Well, if you sounded like you were old enough to drink beer, then that would be fine.
I think it depends on what is being vocalized as well.
I agree that words and phrases like "da da" and "goo goo ga ga" should be avoided.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 47 (view)
 
Micro Cameras in Our TV/Computer,Cable Box, Dash of Our New Cars Ect.
Posted: 2/19/2009 10:45:03 AM

a popular video circulating on You Tube shows the discovery of a spy camera and a microphone hidden inside a digital TV converter box. Such devices are part of a government and industry surveillance program that is undoubtedly connected to the forced digital TV switchover being rolled out in the UK and US.

Undoubtedly? Since I have started saving energy by popping all my popcorn using my cell phone, I use YouTube for all my information needs.

The camera and microphone were hidden inside a MAGNAVOX TB110MW9 Digital to Analog Converter box. We are not suggesting that every digital cable box has a spy camera and microphone inside, so ripping open your cable box is not a good way to prove this one way or another -

Of course it wouldn't be, because then it could more easily be disproved. Santa Claus comes down chimneys too, but don't bother looking for evidence, because he might not come down your chimney.

but the fact remains that companies like Google and Comcast have openly announced that they plan to use hidden cameras and microphones inside their products to spy on consumers.

The fact? Sources?
A quick Google search will show you the sites that are carrying this "report" - the alt.conspiracy newsgroup, and a variety of other blogs, forums, and conspiracy sites. Not places I would be looking for solid information from.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
A guy I am with wants me to spend the night
Posted: 2/11/2009 4:01:21 PM

This guy named James wants me to spend the night at his house

Well, if his name is really James, I would say that you probably shouldn't.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Are larger balls an indication of higher testosterone levels?
Posted: 2/5/2009 10:47:35 AM

How do you measure how big balls are?

Doesn't everybody have a Prader orchiometer?
http://www.seritex.com/orchiometer.html
Great fun at parties!
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 8 (view)
 
A Fairy Tale Kind of Love
Posted: 2/5/2009 10:24:13 AM

Have you ever been so in love with someone... Or you could call it infatuation... that that person was your life? That you felt as if you couldn't breathe without them? That you needed them to live?

Sounds like my relationship with alcohol many years ago. No thanks.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
How does one become less intimidating?
Posted: 2/4/2009 10:56:31 AM
Here are a few tips:
a) no more chain mail garments
b) stop answering the phone "What the f*** do you want?"
c) Show up for initial coffee dates without a weapon
d) Don't keep a can of mace in hand during face to face conversations
e) It doesn't matter if your mom can beat up his mom, don't tell him
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
So what is up with THIS?
Posted: 2/3/2009 4:16:53 PM
Those guys are likely fetishists who can only be gratified sexually if the object of their desire is covered in raw rib eyes or T-bones. I personally find the dripping blood a little off-putting, so I prefer cooked meat, sometimes with some mushrooms and parsley as a garnish. To each their own!
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Age and drinking
Posted: 2/2/2009 10:21:38 AM
I assume you are checking where these "underage" people live?
In my part of Canada, drinking is allowed at 18.
In some parts of Europe, it is 16.
Of course, I never touched a drop until my 18th birthday.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 13 (view)
 
why do men look at my profile, but not chat?????
Posted: 1/27/2009 10:26:02 AM
Do you talk to everyone that you have looked at during the day?
I would think that would get tiresome.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Kitten Fishing
Posted: 1/26/2009 10:34:48 AM
Hmmm...feeding real kittens to "sea kittens"
A new issue for PETA to champion!
Surely sharks can be trained to live a vegan lifestyle.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Guys, have you ever kissed a fella?
Posted: 1/23/2009 4:51:41 PM
While in London, I met my friend Jody's attractive girlfriend, Dil, at a hair salon. Later we talked in a bar, where the next evening I saw her her singing.
I had sort of liked Jody, but he ended up getting run over by British armoured personnel carriers. Nonetheless, I continued to pursue Dil, protecting her from an obsessive suitor and gradually falling in love with her. However, when I later was about to make love to her in her apartment, I discovered that she had a penis and was thus a transwoman, and my initial reaction was of revulsion. Rushing to the bathroom to throw up, I accidentally hit her in the face, leaving a bruise, and left her on the floor by herself.
A few days later I left her a note, and we made up. I realized I was still attracted to Dil, but in a platonic manner.
Oh wait, that wasn't me. That was Stephen Rea.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Women is forced to leave colage because of her computer.
Posted: 1/19/2009 8:37:36 PM
How was this computer supposed to help her with the collage? Most of the time they are composed of newspaper clippings, ribbons, bits of colored or hand-made papers, portions of other artwork, photographs, and such, glued to a piece of paper or canvas.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Ultra Sound Fat Reduction
Posted: 1/8/2009 11:03:59 AM

Why not try a gym membership first?

Because that would only be very sound advice, not ultra sound.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 19 (view)
 
For my fellow guys, can you feel her pu$$y contract when she orgsms?
Posted: 1/7/2009 10:33:37 AM

tartaric sex? lol ( I knew what you meant)

Of course, silly! What did you think tartar sauce was for? Seafood?
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
The ugly side of technology
Posted: 12/31/2008 6:44:10 AM

I watched that video clip where people were popping popcorn with their cells ... scary stuff! (and the cells aren't supposed to damage human brains?)

That was a hoax viral video produced by Cardo Systems - a Bluetooth headset manufacturer.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOZZ6dJiIgo
BTW - you can't cook eggs with them either.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 229 (view)
 
What do you NOT like about sex?
Posted: 12/22/2008 10:56:28 AM
I find that the booster cable clamps always hurt my nipples.
And, it is hard to get the pomegranate stains out of the bed sheets.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 166 (view)
 
How did you come up with your screen name?
Posted: 12/14/2008 8:56:20 PM
I was going to use "Coke Lover" but when you say that with an East European accent (short 'O' instead of long) it projected an image that I didn't think represented what I was trying to get out there.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Dining in or out? Which do you prefer?
Posted: 12/10/2008 10:38:04 AM
I much prefer eating out, or dining at the Y.
I have found though, that this is best done at home, as many restaurants have strict codes about that sort of thing.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
** Need Help Making Salt Crystals **
Posted: 12/3/2008 10:56:48 AM
According to eHow.com...

1. Boil about 1 c. water.
2. Pour the water into a glass jar.
3. Stir in the salt slowly, about a teaspoon at a time. Don't rush this step.
4. Continue until the salt is no longer dissolving but is starting to collect at the bottom of the jar.
5. Choose a color for your crystals and add a couple drops of food coloring.
6. Tie one end of piece of a string around a pencil and tie a paper clip to the other end.
7. Place the pencil over the jar so that the string hangs down and the paper clip almost touches the bottom of the jar.
8. Allow jar to sit someplace where it will be undisturbed.
9. Check after about 24 hours, and you'll see crystals forming in cubical shapes on the paper clip.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Is this considered CHASING?
Posted: 12/1/2008 10:39:19 AM
I think it really depends on the content of said daily emails.
If you dropped a quick note to say "Hi, hope you are having a great day!", that would be probably OK. If your emails were more like "I am sending this email from my cell phone while perched in a utility pole beside your office watching you. Did you know that the Elvis Love Chapel in Vegas has a special on this weekend? I can hardly wait to get pregnant!", then you might be crossing the line.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Religious Paintings and Symbols in a Bedroom
Posted: 11/26/2008 10:44:55 AM
If you were my neighbour's wife or maidservant, it might give me the heebie jeebies...
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 24 (view)
 
Sad stories
Posted: 11/25/2008 10:32:04 AM

What is the saddest part of any story or movie that you can think of?

About 15 minutes into Titanic, when I realized that it was going to continue for another 179 minutes.
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 108 (view)
 
ATTENTION ALL PROUD REDHEADS!!!
Posted: 11/21/2008 2:07:13 PM
How did everyone make out yesterday on "Kick a Ginger" day?
 DietCoke®Guy
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
buh-bye, banana
Posted: 11/21/2008 10:49:52 AM
I have been hearing this for a few years, quite amazing how little press it gets.
You can listen to a SciAm podcast regarding this issue here:
http://www.sciam.com/podcast/episode.cfm?id=7BA7726C-EBE6-29DB-B21F7FF464B293E9
Some of the info they quoted came from here:
http://www.bananabook.org/
 
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