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cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 43 (view)

Party....what are your thoughts? Posted: 7/23/2007 10:56:46 AM
I think you should get a friend to throw the party for you! That way, it won't seem so jaded to some, and it will get you off that hook! Have your friend give it a theme - Like "hey, lets help justaguy back into the dating world." Everyone could bring you something that you will need to re-enter that world/lifestyle - Old Spice, Self-Help Books, a tie.... And then it would be a fun evening.

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 22 (view)

Favorites and Fish Bowls...I had a thought yesterday Posted: 7/15/2007 5:34:29 PM
NOOOOOOOO !!!! Not "Finding Nemo" ----- Shark Tales!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

What Sould I Have Done...if anything...? Posted: 7/15/2007 5:07:05 PM
While thanking him for the compliment was a good start, you should have said more. Maybe explained why that video made you smile. Ask if he has seen it. Something to start a conversation - you know, chatting him up. It doesn't have to be particularly flirty or witty, just real. I know it's hard, but keep practicing and get better with each attempt. Good luck.

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 63 (view)

Initiating first contact... Posted: 7/15/2007 4:46:14 PM
You are right Luck, and personally, I miss that rock throwing, slugging, having my friends pass notes on the playground stuff -- (you remember, I like you, do you like me?) It made things so much easier to deal with and understand! All those layers, they kept life interesting!

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 180 (view)

Online Dating Guide for Men: Part Deux Posted: 7/15/2007 4:27:16 PM
This was so good I nearly wet myself laughing. But there is one thing you forgot -- if you are going to contact a woman, have something to say besides hi, I liked your profile - and if she does respond to that, then have a more interesting follow up!!!!!!! To intiate a conversation when you have nothing to say is an invitation to rejection, deletion and blockage.

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 76 (view)

Ex calls to tell me of his engagement... Posted: 7/15/2007 3:20:49 PM
He wanted to let you know the booty calls would be stopping and he didn't want you to wonder why he dropped out of your life?

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

Grad school... Would a woman stick with a man through it? Posted: 7/15/2007 2:50:20 PM
Most women would do that - just recognize what it took for her to go through that with you - and don't leave her for a teacher's aide, nurse, secretary, whatever. Doing that, after all she gives you during the struggle is a real slap in the face. And it happens quite a bit, so think it through. Don't ask her to commit to staying with you during, unless you are willing to truly commit to staying with her after.

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 101 (view)

Guys in PRISON on POF? WTF? Posted: 7/15/2007 2:23:19 PM
Ted Bundy! Also the Menendez brothers both got married after they went to prison. Scott Peterson gets regular proposals. It's a cottage industry - and it's not limited to men. I read that Aileen Wournos got several proposals too. I don't get the attraction, but hey..... live and let live.

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 23 (view)

Does being totally devoted to someone make any difference? Posted: 7/15/2007 2:02:39 PM
Wow!!! Now there is an offer! And now Tin Man a/k/a Good Deed Doer, tell us what sort of lesson would that teach?????? Anyway, for what it's worth, I think that if he is a man of quality, he would cherish you. And if not, he is not worth the time, effort or devotion. cj

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 32 (view)

Guys don't want to be just friends, but girls do, why is that? Posted: 7/15/2007 7:19:56 AM
There is a big difference between being friends and hanging out with an ex. I am friends with several of my former lovers, but, I don't hang out with them. When I see them it is in a group with shared friends. I do talk on the phone with them, and I do email them occasionally. I think spending alone time with someone I was intimate with when they or I have moved on, is not fair to any of the 3 or possibly 4 people involved. That said, I have several male friends who are and have always been just friends. I see them and I do hang with them but when I am involved with someone, they are always welcome to join us. And when one of us is involved and we hang - it's in a public place - not at each other's houses watching TV, but usually at Starbucks or Panera. Those are my policies for what it's worth.

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 148 (view)

Like a midget at a urinal, I had to be on my toes... Posted: 7/14/2007 8:12:38 PM
I agree with MM, if they would cheat to be with me, they would cheat on me. And if they would try to get me to cheat with them, same thing. I don't see how either of us could ever have trust again. Nor can I see how we would deserve it.

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 43 (view)

Separated, But Dating... Good or Bad? Posted: 7/14/2007 8:02:12 PM
Regardless of whether it is good or bad for the separated person, it is rarely good for the one dating the separated person. If they go back to the spouse, you are hurt, if you are just the transitional person for them, you are hurt. I think long and hard and ask LOTS of questions before I go there. I have still gone, but it has rarely been a good decision. I think the bigger question one needs to ask is, can this person truly be there for me? Can this person give me what I need. If the answer is yes, then go ahead and take the risk. Just do it with your eyes wide open.

cjinindiana

Joined: 6/19/2007

Msg: 47 (view)

Help, why is she contacting me after so long? Back to square one. Posted: 7/10/2007 7:37:33 PM
She will never give you a good reason for what she did. Because, quite honestly, there isn't one. People who truly love one another, don't treat each other that way. And no matter what she says, do you honestly believe it would be the truth? You have begun the process of moving on. There is no explanation that will suffice, and beginning the search for one will only set back your recovery. Block her and keep moving.

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