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kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 10 (view)

Men want out Posted: 10/27/2005 6:18:47 PM
WHEN I WANT OUT, I USUALLY CLIMB THRU THE WONDOW WHEN THEYRE NOT LOOKIN. I PUT THIS DOWN TO BEING BORN BY CAESARIAN. I ALWAYS LEAVE THRU THE WINDOW INSTAED OF THE DOOR. UNFORTUANATLY MY FATHER WAS EX S.A.S ....SO I TEND TO ENTER THRU THE WINDOW TOO. NEEDLESS TO SAY....."TAKE YOU CHILD TO WORK DAY" WAS A HOOT !!!!!!

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

WORKIN FOR THE M.o.D Posted: 10/27/2005 6:15:23 PM
GOT FIRED FIRST DAY LOL APPARANTLY THE SURNAME "FAWKES" ISNT TOO WELCOME IN THE HOUSES OF PARLIAMENT.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 1 (view)

FUNNIEST JOBS Posted: 10/27/2005 6:12:28 PM
I ONCE WORKED IN RECEPTION AT THE HOSPITALS JAUNDICE CLINIC. I GOT FIRED WHEN I ANSWERED THE PHONE AND SAID "YELLOW"

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 20 (view)

Did you ever wonder... Posted: 10/27/2005 6:10:18 PM
DID YOU EVER WONDER HOW HORSES DONT GET IT DOWN THE BACK OF THEIR LEGS

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 1 (view)

WE LIVE AND LEARN........... Posted: 10/27/2005 6:07:57 PM
THEN WE DIE AND FORGET IT ALL

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 1 (view)

EXIT SIGNS ............ Posted: 10/27/2005 6:06:25 PM
THEYRE ON THE WAY OUT ARENT THEY.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 107 (view)

OPRAH FOR PRESIDENT Posted: 10/27/2005 6:02:11 PM
LOL OPRAH WINFREY OPERA WINFREY MORE LIKE. JUST THINK OF THE TUNE THOSE LUNGS COULD CARRY. I CALL HER .........THE HOLE WITH A MINT.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 106 (view)

OPRAH FOR PRESIDENT Posted: 10/27/2005 6:00:16 PM
BUT........WOULD IT STILL BE CALLED THE WHITE HOUSE ? OR WOULD SHE BE "OPPRESSED" BY IT LOL

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 1 (view)

SAVE THE CLAY PIGEON !!!!!!!!! Posted: 10/27/2005 5:57:59 PM
I WENT CLAY BADGER SHOOTING THE OTHER DAY. SO EASY !! AND BEING BLACK AND WHITE ........... THE LICENSE IS CHEAPER

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 1 (view)

SPEED DATING Posted: 10/27/2005 5:56:02 PM
I HAVE JUST TRIED SPEED DATING.......... I HAVE BEEN AWAKE NOW FOR 9 DAYS AND MY NOSTRILS LOOK LIKE THEY HAVE DANDRUFF. IT ALL SEEMED TO HAPPEN SO FAST ............. LAST WEEK I TRIED "L.S.D" DATING.............. OH YOU HAVE LOVELY EYES.....THEYRE REALLY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! NEXT WEEK IM TRYING HEROIN DATING. ..................

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 5 (view)

SPEED DATING Posted: 10/27/2005 5:54:54 PM
I HAVE JUST TRIED SPEED DATING.......... I HAVE BEEN AWAKE NOW FOR 9 DAYS AND MY NOSTRILS LOOK LIKE THEY HAVE DANDRUFF LAST WEEK I TRIED L.S.D DATING.............. OH YOU HAVE LOVELY EYES.....THEYRE REALLY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! NEXT WEEK IM TRYING HEROIN DATING. ..................

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 115 (view)

what ever happened to guys being gentlemen? Posted: 10/27/2005 5:47:02 PM
WHATEVER HAPPENED TO WHITE DOG S**T ?????? YOU GOTTA REALLY HUNT ROUND TO FIND A PEICE NOWADAYS.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 1 (view)

RACISM IN ENGLAND Posted: 10/27/2005 5:43:22 PM
A PAKISTANI MAN WAS FOUND STABBED TO DEATH LAST WEEK WITH 179 STAB WOUNDS IN THE BACK. THE JUDGE SAID IT WAS THE WORST CASE OF SUICIDE HE HAD EVER SEEN. LOL

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 61 (view)

Legalization or Decriminalization? Posted: 10/27/2005 5:40:23 PM
YEAH !!! let those who are stoned.......cast the first sin (or something)

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 53 (view)

Iraq. Another Vietnam war? Posted: 10/27/2005 5:38:39 PM
IF ONLY WE COULD CONVINCE THE IRAQI PEOPLE THAT WE ARE THERE TO HELP THEM...............AND AS SOON AS THEY RUN OUT OF AMMO........WE WILL DAMMIT.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 10 (view)

Any good sugar free recipes out there??? Posted: 10/27/2005 5:36:44 PM
DONOR KEBABS HAVE YOU EVER TRIED A COP KEBAB LOL JUST AS THEYRE ABOUT TO ARREST YOU FOR TRYING TO PAY FOR YOUR KEBAB WITH YOUR NHS DONOR CARD ........ STAB EM WITH A STICK AND ROAST ON OPEN FLAME FOR BETWEEN 20 & 30 MINUTES ALWAYS REMEMBER TO REMOVE THE HELMET FIRST. DRAIN THRU STAB PROF VEST FOR HALF A HOUR......... AND SERVE WITH A NICE SHINY RED APPLE TASTES JUST LIKE BACON FUNNILY ENOUGH. AND ITS SWEEEEEEEET.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 34 (view)

Is marriage the leading cause of divorce? Posted: 10/27/2005 5:32:06 PM
WELL...THEY SAY THAT ALL MARRAIGES ARE HAPPY....... ITS THE LIVING TOGETHER AFTERWARDS THAT RUINS IT LOL IF I EVER GOT MARRIED , I WOULD WANT TO THROW A DIVORCE PARTY TOO. THERE WOULD BE A HALF CAKE .......AND JUST WITH THE GROOM STATUE ON TOP WITH HIS POCKETS TURNED INSIDE OUT .

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 215 (view)

What book are you reading right now? Posted: 10/27/2005 5:28:50 PM
I HAVE JUST PUT DOWN JEFFREY ARCHERS LATEST BOOK I COULDNT STOP LAUGHING. ONE DAY I HOPE TO READ IT

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 26 (view)

Anyone interested in living composers of Classical music? Posted: 10/27/2005 5:22:51 PM
I LIKE ANDREW LLOYD WEBBER. I MET HIM MCDONALDS ONCE. HE ASKED FOR 2 BIG WHOPPERS,......SO I SAID. OK.........YOUR PLAYS ARE GREAT AND YOURE A VERY HANDSOME MAN . LOL WE KEEP A PHOTO OF HIM ON THE MANTLEPEICE TO KEEP ANY KIDS AWAY FROM THE FIRE.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 35 (view)

sex with a dog in the room.... Posted: 10/27/2005 5:08:59 PM
IF DATING A WOMAN IN LONDON I ALWAYS HAVE TO TAKE MYDOG BECAUSE IT SAYS "DOGS MUST BE CARRIED ON THE ESCALATORS" BESIDES THEY USUALLY TELL ME TO BRING MY OWN LIQUOR...... SO I DO. LOL

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 20 (view)

What's your most memorable date with an older woman Posted: 10/27/2005 5:06:54 PM
I WAS 27 SHE WAS 41 AND A BLACK MOMMA. SHE ALSO HAD THE LADIES PHENOMENON "FEMALE EJACULATION" AND WHEN SHE CAME, SHE STUCK MY EYELIDS TOGETHER AND STOLE MY WALLET.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 15 (view)

why do men love to brag Posted: 10/27/2005 5:05:13 PM
DONT KNOW........BUT WHAT I REALLY HATE IS WHEN I'M SLEEPING WITH 3 WOMEN AND THE REALLY UGLY ONE SAYS ...OOOOOOOOOOOH SAVE IT FOR MEEEEEEEEEEE.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 42 (view)

Met a GREAT girl online - LADIES, I NEED YOUR ADVICE!! Posted: 10/27/2005 5:03:33 PM
DONT TELL HER YOURE BLACK HAHAHA LOL

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 34 (view)

sex with a dog in the room.... Posted: 10/27/2005 5:02:29 PM
ON THING I REALLY HATE IS HAVING MY DOG WATCHIN ME AND KNOWIN HE CAN DO A BETTER JOB WITH HER DOGGY STYLE. BLOODY GREAT FOR CLEAN UPS AFTERWARDS THOUGH

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 11 (view)

Ladies can confidence come off as cockiness? Posted: 10/27/2005 5:00:28 PM
AS LONG AS MY****NESS DOESNT COME OFF. IM HAPPY EITHER WAY. I WOULDNT WANT PING AND PONG TO BE LONELY.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 27 (view)

Health/Fitness Forum Posted: 10/27/2005 4:54:00 PM
I WORK OUT RELIGIOUSLY....... I LIFT A WEIGHT AND SA "CHRIST THATS HEAVY"

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

Using the patch to stop smoking. Posted: 10/27/2005 4:50:19 PM
I USE CIGARETTE PATCHES TO KEEP WOMEN COMING BACK.WHEN THEY FALL ASLEEP I COVER THEM IN NICOTINE PATCHES. IN THE MORNING, WHEN THEY LEAVE THEY ALWAYS HAVE AN IRRESISTABLE URGE AND CRAVING TO RETURN

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 15 (view)

Using the patch to stop smoking. Posted: 10/27/2005 4:48:47 PM
TRY PUTTING THE PATCH OVER YUR MOUTH AND EYES........THEN EVEN IF YOU FIND THE CIGARETTES, YOU WONT BE ABLE TO FIND THEM.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 19 (view)

Anyone recommend acupuncture? Posted: 10/27/2005 4:47:28 PM
I DONT REALLY SEE THE POINT !

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 10 (view)

Is this normal, for a man to laugh or cry after a orgasism Posted: 10/27/2005 4:46:32 PM
depends whether or not you remember to take the cigarette out your mouth when having oral. Thats enough to make any man cry. Maybe he was crying because he knew you werent going back LOL

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 41 (view)

Quiting Smoking Posted: 10/27/2005 4:44:42 PM
My doctor told me that in order to attain / maintain fitness, that one must get their heart rate up once a day so i know smoke 40 a day and walk to the top of the stairs.....then im totally f****d. Unfortuantly he also wants me to hold HIS balls and cough so idont go there very often.

kaden

Joined: 4/3/2005

Msg: 69 (view)

What do you eat when you're in a bad mood? Posted: 10/27/2005 4:41:04 PM
I wanna eat Pandas cos it makes me furious they wont mate to save their own species. I mean, we are trying but they dont want to meet us half way do they. They should put all pandas on government benefits, INCOME SUPPORT, WELFARE whatever........ theyll soon breed then. And they already have the black eyes like veryone else in the unemployment queue.

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