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ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 278 (view)

How do you get a guy to not just want you for sex??? Posted: 2/21/2009 7:36:07 PM
If you violate my preference for how I wish or like to be treated and it offends me, then yes, it is a choice to be offended. However, you cannot negate one's feelings legitimately of being offended because they "chose" to be offended. If you are made aware the person doesnt appreciate nor want to communicate with you on a porntext, pornchat level ...especially from a total stranger, respect that. To say that a person is "asking" for rude behavior in a cyber communication, childish thinking. That is grasping for a reason to continue to treat people in an offensive or disrespectful manner. The point of this question is, I believe, not to split hairs on the variances but to understand how she can be pursued or contacted for something beyond or with substance and not for instasex as one poster put it.

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 69 (view)

What do I owe this girl? Posted: 2/21/2009 10:15:16 AM
Basic kindergarten manners are just nice. Most people appreciate them. Being intimate doesnt mean you have a commitment. I agree that a simple 'had fun, take care' is good enough to walk away, free to pursue your next conquest..as she may be doing herself. yep, Windroper, even a player likes more when the stuff is good ROTFLMAO

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 273 (view)

How do you get a guy to not just want you for sex??? Posted: 2/21/2009 10:09:05 AM
^^^ Lets just keep making the person being approached or offended the one who is at fault for unwelcome behavior...............seems to be the easy out.. while your words ring true in live or real settings, this is virtual reality.....which speaks volumes on the "freedoms" many perceive themselves to have of basic manners.

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 48 (view)

If you got your heart's desire Posted: 2/21/2009 9:23:36 AM
Excellent question. I have known my heart's desire in many ways, money, love, relationships, wants..materially,, and you know what? Without that love, everything else is just "stuff" So, yes, having had 'those things I have wished for" *some of them were very painful and not all brought pleasurable results but did allow me to grow more . Therefore, My priorities are grounded and I am more than ready to receive it. I know what I want and will not accept less

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 268 (view)

How do you get a guy to not just want you for sex??? Posted: 2/21/2009 9:07:18 AM
Right state of mind to perform? nope.. Fake it every other time? nope. It's a show? nope Please dont apply this to all females. Original OP I think you make a good point. Being "invisible" as it seems here on the internet makes some people, male and female, less inhibited, and allows him/her to be more boisterous, beligerent or obnoxious to others even. It seems to me, every chat that has occured or email, IM... turns to discussion or attempts to discuss sex. In detail, graphically, if you play along. It is disappointing and makes me think there is no value in meeting someone in person to find out if there is a connection between us. Those using the net for access to sexual opportnities show themselves early and that is a good thing. Unfortunately, it also creates the impression that all internet sites are good for is finding a 'hook up, fast lay,and not what some hope in finding a mate for a lasting or real relationship that brought them to the site in the first place. If women are supposed to acknowledge that men have feelings and want a relationship with one partner, "all men are WIRED for sex" is a crappy excuse to get away with and continue behavior that is a turn off .

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 86 (view)

penetrating her cervix Posted: 2/9/2009 5:36:38 PM
never heard nor experienced that. hmmmm

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 148 (view)

Have you every enjoyed a man with a velvet tongue? Posted: 2/8/2009 7:43:52 AM
more than once. and to those men with those magical tongues thank you baby! :

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 39 (view)

Too soon. Not soon enough. Too keen. Not keen enough. Posted: 2/8/2009 7:33:25 AM
I appreciate seeing a man be open and honest about his feelings and thoughts on sex, relationships and a desire to bond with a person. We need all these things whether we are male or female. This is one of the best posts I have seen here and hope to see more with this substance. THANK YOU FOR BEING SO HONEST AND OPEN For those of us who really want a real and lasting relationship, you said it well!

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 20 (view)

can someone be with someone and be head over heals with the other Posted: 1/30/2009 4:18:07 AM
msg #18...not scary or funny...quite annoying and the post was not about the OP...it is a seperate situation as an example of the games so many guys try to play. And one story of how real women do not play along with the games.

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 16 (view)

can someone be with someone and be head over heals with the other Posted: 1/28/2009 9:06:48 AM
In an unrelated situation to the poster.....I am the one who has been known to him for x number of years...he claims he has the one he loves...but continues to pursue me. We have fun, we laugh, we enjoy each others company, we agree the sex WAS great between us. So you tell me OP...how is it that you can have a relationship and claim in love and try to hold onto someone who is supposed to knowingly take seconds? Have you guys who behave that way hit your freakin heads?????????? NOTE : I have not played into his little game..since he says he is in love..I absolutely do not have sex with or attempt to continue beyond that just friend level that began well over 20 years ago...! I am cool, not stupid or trashy...and I love me even if he doesnt.. I dont even really believe she exists,,I think she is a fictional someone he made up. He tells me family stuff, personal things..but never mentions her..in any context til he tries and I MENTION HER. Whatever...you dont deserve either of them probably..

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

Finding the right girl, after choosing the wrong girl. Posted: 1/25/2009 9:55:25 AM
I hear what you are saying about being open and exposing your heart..but finding the one that you are willing to do so after such a bad experience like crazy girlfriend....guys act like that too....in breakups. It is in that persons head and you cant let it get into yours. That "haunt" of all the bad things you broke away from is a lesson and is meant to help you sift and sort and guard against other loony types so you can have a good relationship. I have been in one serrious relationship after being widowed, and he was oozing psycho but hid it well til had me hooked. It took a great deal of effort and standing my ground to get that final break from him..over a year and miraculously someone else entered his life as a new play toy..lmao...but no joke too.. I am still gun shy so to speak and still havent found or met someone to develop a new relationship with...all in good time. In the mean time, keep working on your wounds or scars from that situation and your fear will lessen. I tell myself that all men will not act the same way and all relationships arent doomed to be painful and end badly. A little thing like faith..and timing. Those two things are important.

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 196 (view)

When you REALLY love a woman...... Posted: 1/21/2009 3:19:34 PM
My DH was not shy in making sure I knew he loved me In every way in his daily routine.. he helped take care of our kids...he "daddied" them... He helped me grow as a person he faced fears of losing me if I changed... he thought I was worth it and wrong me... you had him to face. I could go on and on with the list of knowing how you are loved from my marriage wish more guys were like that...totally commited.. he was a man I would walk through fire for in ways I did,, he was the only boy in the family of all women and they resented me...I took their brother away from them "forsaking all others" they put him in that spot. and he refused to have any thing to do with them.. and not by persuasion.... You did not mess with me He was my protector, my lover, my friend Yes, I was lucky and I KNOW it.

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 201 (view)

Do you believe a woman when she says ... Posted: 1/21/2009 2:43:38 PM
wow do you divide everything up by gender? thought those 'no girls allowed clubs" went away after about age 12...on that level. No, I dont play into pressure,,,am known to have a strong will..and back in the hunting and gathering days..you think women didnt participate in outdoor activities...for survival..? where did you get your information about women? You should read more, and talk to women more..

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

How long can you date without being exclusive? Posted: 1/19/2009 3:59:50 PM
dating is just that....dating.. I wouldnt consider someone I date even close to exclusive... and you dont need an engagement ring to be exclusive either. Its pretty cut and dry and seems to make everything as simple as possible but not very realistic to the way things appear in the singles zones I have experienced. Only when the two involved agree and make it known to others together or seperately ..in directions that count in their lives is it exclusive. I would think it is exclusive when both people want a relationship with each other..and dont seek adventure or playtime or intimacy any where else..of ANY kind..as is understood as being requirements to a committed relationship. That person you are exclusive with brings into the relationship what you need or are seeking to eliminate any one else from the equations of dating vs. relationship, not a ring. and it is a mutual agreement, not a one sided expectation.

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 80 (view)

Have you found and then lost your soulmate? Posted: 1/18/2009 9:06:13 PM
Sinful, you literally betrayed your soul mate and still long for her now? Thanks for sharing that...some people really do those things out of fear,,? If given another chance with her, would you take it? Sorry, not trying to jack the thread, but most wont admit such personally deep info!~

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 62 (view)

Have you found and then lost your soulmate? Posted: 1/10/2009 8:32:46 PM
I did. We were married for 20 years, and he died of a sudden heart attack. Soulmates dont leave each other by ending relationships. Your soulmate is just that...the mate to your self/soul and NOTHING can seperate you til death. Mere humans cannot control the soulmate, I believe, it is bigger than the both of you and you will be together regardless if you are true soulmates.

ROCKON!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

Putting a relationship 'on hold' Posted: 1/10/2009 8:28:35 PM
I have put all relationships on hold due to my kids needs. One reoccurring situation has been much like you stated for a period of years. We are friends but we have been very close, involved sexually but not a relationship. What will work for you? Seems everything in life is very unstable and uncertain, to be sure.

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 350 (view)

would you date a nice guy if hes had very little money Posted: 12/25/2008 12:06:42 PM
well, about that dating...you gotta date the nice guy with no money before you can have a relationship with him. dates dont have to be expensive..the best dates take some gas money and an adventureous spirit. That makes up for the bucks! Besides. I have a decent job,,if I like him enough, I would be glad to cover my own expense, and maybe his...if he is okay with that...how's that for a twist?

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 343 (view)

would you date a nice guy if hes had very little money Posted: 12/24/2008 6:24:44 PM
I married the nicest guy out there many years ago and he and I made our money and life.together... ...lmao..money...so NOT the most important thing at ALL.. I learned life lessons and what true integrity was all about from the struggles we endured, growing up and being adults and responsible parents with him. That is priceless. Now, finding myself single again.. It sure isnt the money that has value..In fact, the guys that I have encountered being single,,if they are about money..money..money..WHAT A TURN OFF. I had opportunity to be very comfortable, taken care of..even though I have a career....this guy brought me coffee in bed..told me he would be willing to be my kids step dad....but he was greedy...money thirsty and hungry..and he has managed well in his business, prominent in our area (I'm a small town girl...OP with that mentality) I am still single... Now, does a man need to be responsible, pay bills, keep things moving? YES. Does he need to take his part in the relationship between he and I ? YES Does he have to WANT to be there? With me? To build a life of OURS....? YES That takes a lot more than being a nice guy or having money, and is what I value.

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

Marriage after 45 Posted: 12/23/2008 7:51:05 AM
I am open to all possiblitlies. I am at a place in my life where I can give some thought to what I want now that my kids are grown. Over the last few years, I have focused on being their mom more than anything on a private level. A relationship of quality where we share and want to be together is the starting point for anything intimate, romantic or beyond. I have had one relationship since becoming single...in which I did consider marrying him...ultimately, what I thought at the time was a good relationship, turned horribly bad rather quickly....it ripped me to pieces and on top of grief, it has taken me lots of time to get it all back in perspective. Remarriage is not out of the question, but I havent paired with him yet..who ever he may be.

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 140 (view)

Dating a Widow Posted: 12/21/2008 10:22:27 AM
Death and divorce are 2 distinct means by which marriage ends. You cannot compare and determine which is worse...both are bad and hurtful, cause scars, require healing. However, one is from literal, physical death of a person involved who wasnt breaking from a relationship. Divorce is a means by which a relationship is no more, not the two individuals who made up the relationship. And another poster factored in children....oh my yes! That fact, being there for your kids who have lost a parent, who will miss big events in their lives..........played a key role in my staying single. My son was 12, my daughter 16. We have gone through many seasons over the last 6 years that have required I be able to freely and openly discuss their dad, what he would have and would not have approved of in their actions and behaviors. In some ways, I have had to "DADDY BY PROXY" that is no easy feat. I can't imagine a man who could have maneuvered a successful relationship with me during these times when I obviously could not be avabilable to juggle all that was occurring. One conversation I had with my daughter right before she gave birth to our first grandbaby was about how I didnt have anyone in my life. I told her, this is mine and your dad's grandchild...I can't and am not able to share this with any other man...He would be expected by me to stay back a little...I can't help how I feel...her reply.."thanks for not putting me in the spot where at a really happy time for me I would have to ignore not wanting another man to touch my baby because he is not my dad" Selfish? Not at all.....it's where we were wtih our loss and how we were affected by her dad not being a part of her joyous moment. Grief is a group reality when you have children and I have dedicated that time of raising them to the vows that included my children. I just told my daughter last night.. "Ya know what,,I think I could actually be in a relationship now...where I could tell you and your brother,,hey, this is for me..." Her reply...."Yeah? That is good to hear." We are a team, I made a promise which I have kept and if I ever have another relationship, I think my kids are going to be warm and accepting of him as he will not have replaced their dad, he will be part of yet another milestone that we will face as a family.

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 32 (view)

She wants to be more than a friend... Posted: 12/20/2008 11:04:35 AM
Tell her you think highly of her and any feelings would be more of a brotherly sister type. Give her a specific kinship label. and stick to it. If you make embraces or hugs or flirty kisses or comments.STOP DOING THAT I have been in a situation similar. I am KOOL with friends..I dont pursue other than hey how are ya? and then the flirts, wantya, dreamaboutya stuff starts and it gets me fired up...because I genuinely like this person. I do feel an affection towards..he matters, his feelings, but I CAN draw a line and leave it there, if you are not doing that, maybe you should try that. The gift .......that will put her in a tail spin...unless you make it clear that your like of her is platonic and you dont dare cross over that line..that is playing with her and you ought not do that. That just isnt nice. Happy holidays and best wishes. She sounds nice, but, is attached to you and you know it! Be nice.

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 295 (view)

What do you think about cougars? Posted: 12/19/2008 7:33:18 PM
You wait til I see the girls at work when I go back from holiday...lol I had no idea what the hell they were talking about.. teasing me about being a cougar.. The young ones chase me I dont approach them. what's that called? It's not Mrs.Robinson,, the one young hottie I "let" close was told to stay away from my then 18 yr old daughter and I told her about him so she wouldnt get hurt if by chance,,,,, He understood we weren't a tag team and he respected that.. He married an older woman..but it wasn't going to be me... mutually rocked the house so my friends at work are in big trouble...!!!!!

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 965 (view)

Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with? Posted: 12/19/2008 6:29:54 PM
how sad that you "socialilze" being in love... to academics .... we must be speaking of a version of love you aren't familiar with. We are referring to that internal connection that one finds with another and is fulfilled by that. LOVE as you speak of can fluctuate with an ebb and flow.. IN LOVE is lasting, can withstand all the wars and fires and anything else manmade.

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 961 (view)

Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with? Posted: 12/18/2008 6:59:13 PM
Being in love with someone is pure.. It is invincible That love cannot be altered by anyone or anything If he or she is cheating They are NOT in love

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 111 (view)

Am I to wait for him to fall for me? Posted: 12/18/2008 6:17:15 PM
You think you should wait? I think you should let your time with him take its course.. He sounds like a real man, taking you both into account. Enjoy quality time with him and see what happens ..dont put a number on when you should or shouldnt have sex . If he doesnt want sex immediately, he might be a keeper. Guys who want immediate sex...good indication they arent good relationship material, but will be good to go when they wanna get laid again. Be glad he is that way, unless you just want the hookup. There is so much more to a good relationship than sex. I want a good relationship, that happens to include really good sex

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 66 (view)

Are grand love affairs a myth? Posted: 12/14/2008 2:26:22 PM
Oh yes, grand love affairs exist. I have known a few . Those times took my breath, Immersed in the depths of someone else.. did any of them last? Oh no But what a joy to have known that kind of intense passion for another and not once but a few times. When I speak of grand love affairs, I refer to the kind you think you will only ever read about in literature, but alas, no, I have been loved, desired and in turn felt the same. It is heavenly and hurts like hell when it ends Is it worth it? Oh yes. Never let fear be a detractor from knowing such passion

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 955 (view)

Can you cheat on a person you are truly in love with? Posted: 12/14/2008 12:09:55 PM
I dont think you are in love with someone if you are pursuing any type of physical or sexual activity or attention from someone else. I was told by a man I had been involved with that he had met someone and he was in love. I respected that. Kept contact minimal, well behaved, and he went there, telling me he thinks about me, dreams about me, wants me. What about her? Was my question. His answer,,,,,what about her? I nearly blew a gasket on him. Told him to repsect her and ME. Know what,,far as I know, he is still involved with her, and continues to tell me he desires me I am not falling for it, him or his lines. He was in town a few weeks ago,,,made a point to come to my house to see me. Got a hello and good bye hug...and he held me against him and pressed his fingers into me. Then sent me a "tuck me in " text... He doesnt love her. He doesnt love me either. I "love" him, but am not and wont allow myself to be in love with him either. We have a long history, I never knew this side of him, but suspected ..... Breaks my heart that my fantasy man...which he once was is a cheater or so screwed up he cant be faithful If I were in love, NO WAY would another person get my attention, like that.

RockOn!

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 21 (view)

How Would You Interpret This? Posted: 12/14/2008 11:33:22 AM
The opposite actually happened to me once.. The guy said "how come it's always me who initiates affection?" So I did and he froze like a popsicle... You never know with guys.. The ones I know run hot and cold.. crave acceptance and fear rejection Want to be loved and percieve it as demanding a commitment It is all so confusing!! When I was married, we just said what we had to say Is it really that different ? I find being single a maze of ???????????????? at every turn.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 48 (view)

Dating a Widow Posted: 11/21/2008 2:26:49 PM
I think the widowed person needs to be made aware from the date or BF/GF they are feeling that way. To just disappear without that explanation isnt any better nor does it assist or encourage the widowed person to consider changing that attitude. It is very fair of the person dating a widow to be honest regardless what the problem may be, including not wanting to be a part of a 3 pointed situation. It happens, true. The widowed person may not realize specific things they say or do that makes others feel that way. It's not like they "know' how to be a widow and what makes others uncomfortable.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 45 (view)

Dating a Widow Posted: 11/19/2008 7:00:10 PM
and you are absolutely correct in that statement #44. Don't pity me.. It is difficult/has been difficult.. but,, I have been loved That alone is a good thing.. and SAINTHOOD OH HELL NO.. I lived with him.. he was a regular man..a good man, with flaws and qualities.. and ya know what.. since I HAVE BEEN LOVED.. If I ever love again, I understand what it means to love and be loved.. A new love in my life would definitely benefit from that hard earned wisdom. I lost to circumstances beyond my control..but should I fall in love... I know how short life is, how fragile it can be and how quickly one you love is gone for good, no take backs, no do overs, no I'm sorry's... that can fix it. It is a done deal, over, out of your grasp forever. except for that place in your heart where you store all your treasured memories of those you love, living or dead.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 40 (view)

Dating a Widow Posted: 11/17/2008 6:05:49 PM
I would think any person who you might date and thinks you would need to lean on them or cry or other drama as put before, has a total misunderstanding of the concept of loss and grief. You dont have to cry and have drama to mention a spouse you loved and shared a life with either. We all handle our loss the way we handle our loss. There is no wrong way and no right way.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 31 (view)

Dating a Widow Posted: 11/16/2008 5:51:04 PM
The widows I know have not moved on, they have moved through the grief and loss. You have to remember, when a person is widowed, it is by a situation or event that they did not have any input or decision in. It happened to them. It wasnt an action he or she took on their own. It sounds so cold, closed and indifferent to speak of someone you shared such intimacy with across a time span like they were a coat or a truck you used to drive. Healing isnt about the ability to never speak of them. Although for some, that is one way to manage, cope or deal. It doesnt make it wrong. It isnt accurate to generalize that mindset and closed off approach to everyone who ever lost a spouse. Our marriages were taken from us. Even the government gets in on it and declares your marriage ended. Yep, they send you a letter stating exactly in those words. That notification is sent through survivors benefits for your children or qualifying spouse, btw, and it is impersonal and way too soon after the death occurs. I am explaining all this I suppose as unless you have not experienced this in your life, there are many many layers involved in ways that your life changes that it boggles the mind to try to adjust to the spouse just being with you one day and GONE the next. You also cannot put a number on when a widow should be finished, or proper time for dating or any thing connected to living and making decisions. Even people very close to the couple contribute additional problems that the widow is faced to handle and deal with all alone after being part of a team. Just an inside view, for you if you are interested in understanding any of the widowhood reality. PEACE

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 19 (view)

Dating a Widow Posted: 11/14/2008 3:17:51 PM
Dating a widow is different I guess, only dont assume that it was all love and romance til death us do part. I am sure they had a real relationship that encountered real life issues too. He was, and mine, afterall, still a man. If the two of you are connecting and she is telling you things or mentioning him, it is a subtle way of letting you know she knows he is not part of this and at the same time respecting what once was. It can be complicated or awkward but it doesnt have to be. You sound good hearted and genuinely concerned about her. LUCKY LADY.. Best wishes...we widows wobble, but we dont fall down. Transitions come in all directions for us. I am close to six years out, still wear my ring, on the opposite hand,,it is comforting and a reminder that when things get tough, I have known real and lasting love. It is not a symbol of staying married to him. Lots of things mean different things among widows too.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 110 (view)

Feeling rather Bitter here-what ever happened to Karma? Posted: 11/9/2008 2:02:08 PM
yea. my thoughts about this turn to "sorry for her, glad for me" not sure when or how he will get his karma, I know how mine has played out..and I am a big girl about it. I know that he too, has a debt to repay. She is going to break his heart in so many pieces that he wont be able to get em across state lines to get to me..... He is a cheater.... I was vulnerable, (hate that I was vulnerable, but IWAS...widowed 3 months when the games began) I know we have to work for a lil redemption of our own as our Karma plays out too. Ya, no one is exempt from karma...even if you dont see or know about it It is there...always...not my problem about his,,,working on my own issues about all that.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 59 (view)

Why Can't he cum Posted: 11/9/2008 8:19:00 AM
The guys here are giving pretty good MAN information and yet you only hear the comments that tear this guy down........he's BI, *(not that that is WRONG) He fears intimacy... It is far too common for people to force someone into a box they do not belong in because it makes them feel better. My educated background is in Behavioral Sciences, and every time there is an issue with people in general, they want to play therapist and conduct their own ill prepared, diagnosis of someone else. I have read enough of one poster on this thread to see a running theme.. she believes everyone is screwed up and needs counseling.......errrrrrr uhhhhhhhm in the sciences, if you cant let someone vary and have any differing ways or behaviors from YOU its usually YOU who needs the therapy...... not that we all dont need some self understanding and how it is that we affect others same as the way we are affected... probably too deep for this discussion,,but this is the stuff that gives therapy and counseling a bad wrap within our culture..its too quickly the bandaid, right now cure simply to make the one pointing at another feel better... that is a self esteem dynamic, btw..........

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 56 (view)

Why Can't he cum Posted: 11/9/2008 5:59:40 AM
Maybe he hasn't had a woman who is really into satisfying a man. There is nothing more sexually fuliflling or stimulating --other than the O itself, than knowing you have brought total orgasm to a man. What a hurtful thing to say he id BI when you dont know. A guy who can last, oh hell ya...never been with a man who couldnt last until he gave me mine, he got his, or we got it together. I would think you would be willing to "do" certain things during the "act' whatever your preferences.....to stimulate him more...there is teasing,,and ways to enhance his experience to get him off. I love watching a man have an orgasm.........how awesome!.........and I love knowing I caused it. Guys have sensitive spots same as we do, just different. And to say that he mastubates too much...that causes it...doubt that too. We have more ways than our vaginas to provide a man we have sex with sexual satisfaction. Never had a lover I didtnt please. You need to be creative, uninhibited, and willing to give him some extra attention.....a 25 yr old may not be all that experienced. Hell that could apply to a man or woman of any age. Have fun with your challenge of getting him off. This doesnt have to be a stressor or a negative ....

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 79 (view)

Over 45 and happy to stay single for the rest of your life? Posted: 11/8/2008 8:25:16 PM
battle fatigue isn't a bad way to sum up the results of engaging the reality of life in the single lane...lmao, sad, but, true

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 63 (view)

Over 45 and happy to stay single for the rest of your life? Posted: 11/6/2008 7:26:14 PM
I am all I need, just not all I want. IF a relationship were to happen, I get to participate in setting the parameters and be 1/2 of an active, enjoyable relationship that has 2 sides combined. Otherwise, yeah,,Iwill stay single the rest of my life. By choice. My choice.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 18 (view)

If you were really in love.... Posted: 11/4/2008 4:17:36 AM
yeah, your nonsense response is the circular motion of all of his behavior. Cindy isnt a relative, he is in a commited relationship with her, ;pursuing what he has already had opportunity to create with Jill....but didnt... Jill opted to be just friends..he wont leave it at that. Jill was the wife of a very close friend...who is no longer part of the situation, so to speak

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 16 (view)

If you were really in love.... Posted: 11/3/2008 9:35:34 PM
when he tells Jill all of this, Jill asks "what about Cinderella?" Jack replies": what about her? Doesnt matter who is who...again...

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 13 (view)

If you were really in love.... Posted: 11/3/2008 8:30:56 PM
its just a question...but I can give em names if it helps the reader.. Jack tells Jill that he loves Cinderella but tells Jill "I have always wanted you, you turn me on, always have, dream about you every time we talk, want to see you" Jill told Jack "you need to respect Cinderella and Me. Jill isn't trying to have anything other than an "old friends who just keep in touch situation...but prior to Jack being "in love" it had gone there before...with no relationship established long term or official. Jack and Jill have known each other over 2 decades.. My answer isnt the issue. I know my answer. it is not rhetorical, nor loaded. It was stated clearly, what the question was. It isnt about the juicy details, who is who is irrelevant, the issue is to be really in love, one would not "need' to seek out another ...it speaks volumes of someone's character. Wondered what GUYS think, or I would've posted in ASK A GAL...thanks ladies, btw. It also isnt about getting played..it is about what your answer to that question. what I "know" is irrelevant, as I asked you all.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 4 (view)

If you were really in love.... Posted: 11/3/2008 3:33:20 PM
no way you would approach another woman? OP^ My thoughts on that would be if you (or I with a man) I absolutely would NOT be seeking beyond. The focus is not on being played, it is on the question IF YOU WERE IN LOVE, WOULD YOU approach another woman. It would seem to me that she would be all you need, if she even exists. Or he is the worse of the cheaters in the cheatin pond..would a guy do this if he was THAT afraid of a commitment? I can ask questions all day...and fill in the blanks, and that is hardly fair to make those generalized statements. Yes, it happens....I know that, want your opinions on that question, specifically as it applies to you, the individual man.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

If you were really in love.... Posted: 11/3/2008 3:16:34 PM
with a woman and was crazy about her, would you be approaching another woman to spend time with and keep something beyond a simple friendship ? Let me get some discussion and I will gladly add information if or as it applies. Thanks!

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 52 (view)

Heart or Head Posted: 11/3/2008 3:05:24 PM
Here is an experience I have had... Head tells me,,nope dont love you, but claims that he wants you Heart is so torn to bits about seeming to want what I cannot have Gut says...he is scared to living hell So, head rules out to keep the rest of me in check.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 50 (view)

Heart or Head Posted: 11/1/2008 10:21:03 PM
My lil sister states it this way: I am not an option I am a priority I am going with her on this one.. you know, trust you, which is inclusive of your Head, your Heart and your Gut PEACE/ROCK ON/:

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 63 (view)

Traits of a person likely to commit marital infidelity Posted: 10/25/2008 9:26:20 AM
Infedility can happen to anyone if and when all the elements are in play. It happens in the best of relationships. It does NOT have to be the END of the relationship, It can actually be a factor upon which to rebuild and repair and redefine a relationship. Been there done that, got the t shirt and aint mad about it. A whole lotta of stuff goes on in a long term relationship, including "human moments" and bad decisions. Forgiveness and understanding plays into "getting past" one moment in time. THIS DOES NOT APPLY TO THOSE WHO REPEATEDLY CHEAT IN A RELATIONSHIP Only to those that have experienced and learn and grow as a result. So, is it true, Once a cheater, always a cheater? Individual differences are required to answer that by each person who has been a cheater.

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 167 (view)

When you REALLY love a woman...... Posted: 10/25/2008 9:06:16 AM
otismo,, I had all that...and gave the same in return to him.. would still have it, but that last line in the wedding vows prevailed.. so here I am looking at .......... and learning there are worse things than being alone and to have known that love on that level HOW LUCKY I HAD BEEN TO HAVE HAD THAT If I never have it again.. I can live with that less is unacceptble

pinkrebel

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 156 (view)

When you REALLY love a woman...... Posted: 8/12/2008 6:45:55 PM
It is the staying power...even through the hardest times, that "oneness" that you pledge...either in ceremony of marriage or through your spiritual connection. When he really loves you, you KNOW...unspoken, his love IS..at least the one who really loved ME in my lifetime..when the going got tough, we dug in together and saw our troubles to the end..that is how I knew I was loved. True to the vows we took and kept ..even in the hard moments. Will I ever know another way? It is possible since we are all unique. KEEP THE FAITH Real love adds to you It doesn't take from you

1tuffgirl

Joined: 8/2/2007

Msg: 1489 (view)

Why men don't date strong women... Posted: 7/6/2008 5:39:30 AM
After much reading, I dont disagree with anyone's point as the type of people each are looking for are in line with what they want in a person. I am not trying to fit a pattern because whoever he is for me, wants me just like I am...anything less than my real self is fake. HAPPY FISHING may all your expectations be met, cuz I AINT SETTLIN EITHER

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