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Thread: Would a man seriously date a woman with three kids

Joined: 8/14/2007

Msg: 202 (view)

Would a man seriously date a woman with three kids Posted: 12/22/2008 4:23:21 PM
My take.... I have 3 kids aged 10, 8 and 6. I met a man here on POF about a year ago whom I thought was really interested in me, I was definately into him. We dated for about 3 months. He had 3 kids of his own and for all intents and purposes it went really well. Scary well. But in the end I believe that he just wasn't as attracted to me because I was at that time a few pounds overweight. I think if you're going to date and you have 3 kids, you'd better be better than most of the women on here without kids. Skinny, sexy, rocket scientist, a woman who knows how to fix her own house, funny, easy-going, independent and self-supporting. And it wouldn't hurt if you were the next "post-it" note inventor. Or Sports Illustrated swim suit model. I have enough money to support a partner who doesn't work... yet... I have lots of trouble getting a man to commit. I think it's the fact that I have 3 kids and I'm not a swim-suit model. I can guarantee that if Christie Brinkley walked on the scene here, she'd have no trouble finding a boyfriend... sorry men... but you really are more interested in a really smokin' body than anything else. I've dated more than my share of guys willing to sleep with me... sure they'll sleep with me... but more than that? Not really. It's funny really, it's almost like they reserve it as a trump card once you have slept with them... "gee now that I think about it... 3 kids is an awful lot" While I agree with most posters here, children are a big responsibility, I also think it's unfair for a man who isn't sure... to get too involved with a woman who has kids. Sure he may not know until he is there, but he already knows... On a first date I point blank asked a guy if he was worried about dating a woman with 3 kids... he said "he'd worry about that later." I never went out with him again. I've only introduced two men to my kids... the first one was a lesson, the second is a friend. That being said, yes there are men out there who will take on the challenge but I have found that they are well over 15 years my senior. Frankly, I'm not looking for that. So I'm not giving up entirely... but I'm not holding out any hope either... just watch out guys... when I turn 50... I'll be the one to catch.

Joined: 8/14/2007

Msg: 877 (view)

Is Intelligence A Curse In Relationships? Posted: 7/5/2008 7:37:46 PM
OMG.... a smart man can get me t0 do almost anything... almost. LOL. NoseyNeighbor, you make some good points, I however, disagree. I haven't met too many men who can actually keep up with me intellectually. For me intelligence is the most critical part of the relationship. I also know that John Gray is right about the man needing to pursue the woman. I have dated many a near genius only to find that they really need to be in control of the relationship. If I suggest a date or anything... eh... they are too busy.. blah blah blah. Even the geniuses are controlled by their you know whats. The human brain is still only human and the male brain, is still "male", genius or no, they all have the same need. I only know that I hate dating men that I have to explain what that word was I just used. Ewww... major turn off. I realize I just used the word ewww... but smart or not smart they are all just men. And they are usually (this is "my" experience talking here, so don't take it personally if it isn't you) just after one thing. It's integrity that matters most, then intelligence. Although if you are a man with both... where the hell have you been all my life baby?

Joined: 8/14/2007

Msg: 39 (view)

Ever Feel Like You Just Cant Get Over It? Posted: 1/27/2008 6:18:00 PM
Well it is very hard to get over someone who told you that they loved you then later denied they ever said it(which sadly happened in my case). I think it has to do with trusting that the next one won't lie about his/her feelings for you. If you don't like me, tell me, don't string me along until something better comes along. I think they use you as a pacifier. Sort of swinging from vine to vine so they don't have to be alone. However, when you lie to other people for your own purposes it eventually ends up hurting you because you can never be close to another person. Be thankful that you allow people to get close enough to hurt you, because then and only then is when you are able to love. These users are incapable of love. They do a great imitation. Bravo! And it's truly sad. We can always hope that the next one will not spare our feelings and just plain old be done with us after the first date. There are a lot of reasons people lie about their feelings. Sometimes they are afraid to love, that they won't be good enough, so they purposely seek out people that they know won't work out for them before they even begin. Yep I'm back here after what I thought was the "one", he even said I was the "one". Came back here to find him back here. I'm taking it much slower this time. This is by far the hardest breakup for me because he was such a good actor and lier. I believed him that things were ok when they weren't. I don't know maybe he wasn't ready for a serious relationship and he was just trying me on and tossed me aside when it seemed too tight. You can live in the past or live in the future. Pick one.

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