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Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 37 (view)

First date interrogations Posted: 12/9/2007 3:28:26 PM
I don't normally ask a lot of questions on a first date, but last night I felt it was necessary because he wasn't saying anything. I like a little bit of quiet time, but there should still be conversation. My questions were simple though, "Where do you live?" "How do you like it there?" "What do you for fun?" "Do you have pets?" "Do you have children?" I didn't ask him about dating experiences or why he was single. I don't like those questions being asked of me when I just meet someone, so I don't ask them. I think that the 20 questions game is usually like what other people have said, a sign of insecurity or of someone who has been burned in the past. I also think that is, like in my case, an opportunity to get a conversation going. In some cases, I have been the recipient of a barrage of questions and I think that is from people trying to find the "perfect" person. They have an idea of who they want in mind and they have absolutely no flexibility for a real person who does not fit their "perfect" ideal, but who, nonetheless, has qualities that they've never considered.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 24 (view)

Revenge on a troll Posted: 10/8/2007 3:57:37 PM
She is a coke sniffing gold digging tramp that only dates men with money, and boy will I'd be having a glass of champagne when her latest victim dumps her on her pointy. So yeah it was more of a daydream post, but just trying to get the poison out, ya know? You're thinking about this, so the damage is done. "Get the poison out"? You're the one making poison by carrying on this discussion. You have independently decided that somebody, who was probably being childish, must lose in the game of who can be more childish. You have already proven in this thread that you have the propensity to be more childish than somebody who vents on a MySpace page, do you really need to continue this game? You are the one on the losing end with every step you take in this inane direction. If you really want counsel from the open public, which is the impression with posts like yours, then you should really discuss how these acts have hurt you and not how you can be so much more stupid with your view of "revenge" than anyone who called you a name. It is NOT the other woman's fault that your ex wants nothing to do with you. If you threw him out or made it uncomfortable for him to stay, then he does not owe you rent. He found somebody else and found the strength to move on, even if it the other relationship didn't work out. It isn't her fault. You and your ex did not work out. So? Being vindictive against somebody else will not make you the better person. It will drop you down a few pegs, though. I have done nothing, SHE is emailing me and generally acting like an idiot. I'm on here venting about it to AVOID doing something I might regret. Emails are easily blocked, so this is not an issue at all, unless you are looking for a reason to be an idiot yourself. You're act of "venting" is a childish attempt to stir up needless negativity in other people because you don't want to wallow in your mire alone. People will respect you if you grow up and behave like an adult. You should also avoid drug users because no good will come of that association. Nobody can make another person use drugs. The girl did not make your ex use drugs. He used drugs and you should have dumped when you first knew that he got high.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 37 (view)

Cast Iron, Aluminum, Stainless Steel, Teflon.. Posted: 10/7/2007 11:17:59 AM
I use cast iron on rare occasions. I have anodized aluminum from years ago, but I don't use the frying or sauté pans anymore. My favorite is copper with a stainless steel lining. My dream cookware would be a complete Mauviel set, but I do like my Revere frying pan, although I wish I bought the entire set before they quit making copper cookware. Now they only have the cheesy copper bottom cookware. No offense to people that like that, but I think it's cheesy.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 23 (view)

Are men shy or just too macho to show their interested? Posted: 10/4/2007 6:13:05 PM
when yet another message is met with complete silence, you do tend to start feeling somewhat ignored Maybe you should look at this another way. The woman is interested in you, but she's dating someone right now and she wants to give guys her undivided attention when she dates them. She also wants to keep the door with you open if the current guy doesn't work out. Saying "No" closes the door. What are you saying in your emails? Because you look like a nice guy. I'd respond to a message from you, unless you started talking about something obscene, in which case, I'd delete you like I have with others that have done that.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 54 (view)

Why women always want to know? Posted: 10/4/2007 5:51:22 PM
Why women always want to know? What a funny question. I was commenting to friends that men on POF frequently ask me that question before we've even met in person. Personally, I like a little privacy before I get to know a person. And by "getting to know a person," I don't mean finding about all of a person's past relationships. Obviously, the past relationships didn't work out. What kind of positive answer could be expected from that question? I also don't want know a guy's relationship history when we've just met. One guy volunteered all of the details of his marriage, his recent divorce, his ex-wife's interest in dating him again, and all of his flaws. I never asked a question about his history. I asked him about his dog, though. Suffice it to say, that this guy and I never met in person and I only spoke to him for about four days. Now when dating starts to get serious, then the question becomes a little more important and relevant. But why is it one of the first questions that people ask? Nobody's ever asked me what I like to do when I'm with friends, what is my favorite place to visit, what's my favorite beer, y'know, questions about important stuff. Maybe after the second date we can talk about relationships, but is it really necessary before the first date?

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 12 (view)

Are men shy or just too macho to show their interested? Posted: 10/3/2007 12:39:35 PM
Men like to be mysterious and keep women on their toes. So, you only date women that wear high heels?

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

Are men shy or just too macho to show their interested? Posted: 10/3/2007 12:38:08 PM
The reason is we send a email and no one returns one even to say we dont click. I don't respond to some emails for a number of reasons, but mainly I don't want to start a dialog where I might be asked to explain my reasons that can include age, ethnicity, or something in the person's profile that makes me nervous. I don't want to risk dealing with a dialog that may include reasons why I should change. That kind of exchange is too negative and I like to keep my experiences on POF positive. Although, I have occasionally responded the second or third time someone has emailed me. Sometimes, the first email just gets past me or it really didn't say anything to get my attention. Also, if I'm actively corresponding with someone, then I don't want to divide my attention, so I tend to focus on one person at a time. Quite frankly, I would like guys to understand that, for me at least, it seems hurtful to say that I don't have an interest in a particular person, so I would rather not say that. I don't think that a lack of response to emails should be a deterrent to making the first contact. I make the first contact when I see somebody that I like and I don't take silence to be rude.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

Are men shy or just too macho to show their interested? Posted: 10/3/2007 12:25:25 PM
OP - You can drop a note to a guy to show that you might be interested. You're not making a commitment. It is like walking past a cute guy while shopping. Suppose you're both looking at the same silicone spatula, do you wait for him to say something first? I would make a comment about the spatula (or whatever item, but not person, he happens to be looking at) and start up some small talk to see if there is a possible connection. If he responds, "Yeah, my wife loves those," then I know, move on. But a little conversation can lead to a bigger conversation and then to something more.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

What's the weirdest thing you've seen while driving down the freeway? Posted: 10/1/2007 9:37:07 PM
I saw a truck loaded with, like, five dead moose. It was very macabre.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

What's the weirdest thing you've seen while driving down the freeway? Posted: 10/1/2007 9:35:24 PM
While following my ex as he was moving my furniture on his trailer, my dresser slid off and drawers flew open scattering my bras and panties all over the highway! And you're still single?

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 37 (view)

When does it come off? Posted: 10/1/2007 9:17:08 PM
I blew up all my old condoms. I even set a trap for my cat with one. Suddenly, I have a great idea. I have these expired glow in the dark condoms. I can get them filled with helium, let them get a good charge with some light, and set them free in a strategic location. Maybe, people will call the media about UFOs. teehee. Halloween is coming up. Hey! I'm going to an "adult" party the Saturday before Halloween. Maybe I'll bring balloons. This is what I love about POF forums. They're so educational.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 86 (view)

Admit a flaw Posted: 10/1/2007 9:02:17 PM
Well, first there's the POF addiction, but that's not really a flaw. I occasionally get obsessive over details that I think are interesting, like noticing and mentioning that the browser window title for this web page is, "Admit a flaw Free Dating, Singles and Personals." It's like the web page speaks for itself. Not really a flaw, though. Hey, is my extra, although undeveloped, pair a flaw or just a quirky attribute?

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 127 (view)

Name one good thing about yourself. Posted: 10/1/2007 8:51:52 PM
I have an excellent grasp of sarcasm. Unfortunately, that isn't really the date magnet you'd think it'd be.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 4132 (view)

What is wrong with the persons profile above you in this thread? Posted: 10/1/2007 8:38:22 PM
Nice pics, lots of variety. Naughtical seems like a nice person. But that's not really something wrong, now is it?

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 175 (view)

Best break-up lines Posted: 9/11/2007 8:15:14 AM
Starry_night, Mad Libs for break-up lines? That's good. All I'm adding to this thread is, "My attention span is too short for you."

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 4071 (view)

What is wrong with the persons profile above you in this thread? Posted: 9/9/2007 7:09:43 PM
native_sunshine, it kinda sounds like your comments are turning into a bit of a flame. I noticed that you had a lofty opinion of yourself in your profile that you might want to tone down for a dating site. Apparently, you have a lofty opinion of yourself in general. I would certainly not want to see that behavior in anyone, female or male. If you were a man and took that tone, then I would suspect that you were a player looking for a score and I would avoid you. I'm not "cheering" about anything in my profile, but I am mentioning what I do in my life and in my spare time. "Fifth-tier toilet." Like tier even matters. It doesn't and where I choose to receive an education is my business. The school I chose is also complying with the new CBE guidelines, so it will continue to be permitted to grant JD degrees. I could have chosen to pursue an MBA or other graduate degree or nothing at all, but this is what I chose. Why would you, a total stranger to me, criticize that? That's a rhetorical question, please don't answer. I'm not changing my preferences about who can contact me because I do receive PoF email from other people who use the forum who may not be "date" material, like friends. Duh. And what's with the criticism about the men that I have met, my marital status, and my age? Again, that's rhetorical. Your comments are patently irrelevant and irreverent. About your profile. Don't change a thing. Your profile makes you sound like a conceited, combative, and critical person. Based on your comments to me, you are. You know, slamming people the way you do can really make PoF a very unfriendly place. I offered constructive criticism about what I saw in your profile and I opened myself up for criticism about mine. That's the purpose of the thread. But I didn't invite criticism about my life.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 4069 (view)

What is wrong with the persons profile above you in this thread? Posted: 9/9/2007 4:58:49 PM
Alrighty, I'm at this again. Hopefully, I didn't lose my place in the thread again. Native_Sunshine seems like a very nice person, however, her profile comes off a little strong and possibly confrontational. For the positives, she seems very attractive, well-educated, from money, very honest and upfront, and not shy about being herself. Her posts also give insight into her character, which seems nice. On to the negatives. We all have to deal with people who are married and say they are single, but stating past annoyances about these issues in a profile will not exactly attracted good people. So the criticism of what is likely past experiences should probably be dropped. Also, calling men liars and moochers and attacking men who may be to shy to have a voice conversation right away sounds a little harsh. The comments about Nob Hill and a law degree sound like you are trying to put yourself above other people, so somebody will need to climb a high tower to reach you. When you add your tone to your interests that include boxing and paintball, then you might sound scary, although some men might really be into that, so your profile might be alright if you enjoy the responses that you receive. FYI: It is impossible to be vegan and ride a motorcycle because the rubber in the in the tires on the motorcycle and other parts contain animal products. Also, if you have a leather seat on your bike, then you know you aren't vegan. Perhaps you have a vegan diet, but being "vegan" is to follow an impossible ideal of avoiding the use of all animal products. Now, onto my profile, which is up for review again. What are the odds that the first comment will be, "CHANGE THAT PIC!"?

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

Scams from women on dating sites Posted: 9/9/2007 3:49:24 PM
Don't date women from Nigeria. PoF allows to limit your searches to geographic areas. Someone from Nigeria won't know about the big whatever that happened on your local street corner, so you would probably have better success in your pre-screening process for determining the people you really want to meet in person. I imagine if somebody falls through email without there being a personal meeting, then there should really be a huge red flag.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 164 (view)

Best break-up lines Posted: 9/7/2007 10:12:52 AM
In a slightly frightened and sheepish voice, "Are we going to get arrested?" Well, it wasn't really a break-up line, but it was a good indication that we had little future together.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 21 (view)

Which came first the chicken or the egg? Posted: 9/7/2007 9:34:53 AM
I think that religion serves a social purpose of uniting like-minded people who share many of the same values. Choosing a religion is like choosing a political party. You find one that has most of the values that you do and you expect to meet and connect with people whom you feel will be compatible to you. With a political party, there is the goal of moving government into a direction that is consistent with the party so that followers of the party can feel comfortable with their government. For religion, there is goal of moving society in a particular direction for the comfort of the followers of the religion. Religion has the added bonus of claiming that true followers of the religion will all wind up in the same place when they die. Sort of like a large group of POFers organizing a long trip. Everybody meets at a specific place, they plan the route to take, they take off in separate vehicles, and everyone that followed the route correctly should wind up at the same place. I guess that's very reassuring for people who think that they will have no one to talk to at the end of the trip, whether its life or travel.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 4055 (view)

What is wrong with the persons profile above you in this thread? Posted: 9/6/2007 10:24:13 PM
Ah, EnglishGuy200. Very down-to-Earth and approachable profile. He doesn't frighten people the way I do. I was reading and got to the line "not into women" and saw a problem, but then I continued to read, "with more issues." I think that it is a bad idea to mention issues or drama or anything negative in a profile because who really says that they want that? And it just sounds negative. The comment, "when you leave this site for 6 months and then come back and its all the same people, what does that mean? Is it the site or the people??" sounds like it could be critical of POF. That might not be good. I'd also like to see some paragraphing. When I saw "englishguy200 Appears on 0 members favorites lists," I didn't know if nobody liked you or if you delete your entries on favorites lists for security reasons, so I added you to my list. And I'd go out with you. Your like an 8-hour commute away, though, 6 hours if the cops aren't watching.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

California's forum Posted: 9/6/2007 5:12:29 PM
A: Because Coloradans aren't as exciting as Californians, and the moderators don't want them to feel inhibited. Q: Why is today such a beautiful day?

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 65 (view)

No More Lurking! Posted: 9/6/2007 12:00:53 PM
Is it really lurking if the voices in my head yell at the posts? Now if I can get the voices in my head to type... I like posting. You know, it isn't really an addiction if you truly need it.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 64 (view)

No More Lurking! Posted: 9/6/2007 11:55:14 AM
Wasn't Captain Lurk on Star Trek?

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 4040 (view)

What is wrong with the persons profile above you in this thread? Posted: 9/5/2007 3:25:11 PM
Golly Out4aWalk, Feeling a little harsh today? I guess if the responses to my profile had been really that bad in the past 13 days, then I might consider some of your comments as constructive. So far, my responses have been good, but the "connection" with the guys that I've met was off. Even the "bad" dates and connections have been alright. Not excellent, but good, and after your review, they seem really good. I do get email from people that do not interest me and I have corresponded with people that really didn't ignite a spark, but I am very happy with about the people that I have communicated with. So I'm not seeing any big changes in my profile anytime soon, although I do make changes and additions every few days. Finally, Christy2Luv, you sure know your way around constructive criticism. I have been changing my profile every few days and I added the bit about work the day the contract was finally signed, last week. It'll come out with the next re-write. I think that I'll keep the date ideas for now because it's good to have a list for anybody that's interested whether they're interested in me or not. I don't know what to do about the red hair explanations, I got tired of explaining that in email, so I put it in the profile. A lot of my profile stuff comes from things that I have had to explain in email that just don't interest me, like the part about the puppy. But thanks for the constructive criticism, I'm still new here. You can steal any date ideas you want.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 10 (view)

Major review needed! Posted: 9/5/2007 12:19:20 PM
I totally agree with TO Woman. I read your profile and started to feel like I just ran a couple of miles. Only a couple, so it wasn't that overwhelming, but when I meet someone, I want to relax and see if there could be a bond between us. How would I, if I was considering you, be able to do that while biking, rock climbing, skiing, or racing something? Your profile goes too fast for meeting someone. Where is a woman supposed to fit in your highly active lifestyle? You should try to see where a woman can fit in your life and make a lot of room there for women to see how they might fit in with you. Perhaps you can discuss some of your less aerobic favorite activities. You might also consider where you would be willing to be flexible so that she doesn't have to make sure that she fits in with you completely and that you will do things to try to fit in with her to some extent. What will you offer to a woman? What sorts of softer and slower things will you appreciate if they were offered to you?

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 50 (view)

Got stood up Posted: 9/5/2007 11:57:51 AM
I think I can theorize why a woman would break a date with the PolarBearKing. His posts in this thread seem to have a genuine concern that elicited appropriate and well-intentioned comments that he ultimately objected to. He then twisted the comments about his objections into something that they were not and he failed to fully acknowledge those comments and went on to sound combative. During his first post I felt sympathetic and toward the later posts I began to feel that he is a threatening person. I'd break the dates too if this is how pre-date communication went.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 4036 (view)

What is wrong with the persons profile above you in this thread? Posted: 9/5/2007 11:43:07 AM
Wonderful! I should've reloaded the page again. Now, there's somebody else above my post and then there's me up there. Great... Is it too early for beer? That oughtta do it.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 4035 (view)

What is wrong with the persons profile above you in this thread? Posted: 9/5/2007 11:38:54 AM
Wow. I get ladydi8. I even reloaded the page to see if somebody else would post so that I could comment on a different profile. Well, ladydi8 seems a little fishy. I'm a non-smoking, vegetarian seeking a man and this profile re-instills my conviction that I'm a non-smoking, vegetarian seeking a man. Now, if ladydi8 really enjoys bass and turtles and cigarettes, then the profile really suits her. But I think a clear (not fuzzy) shot of her face looking forward without a bass, cigarette, or coffee mug in front of it would be good. LadyDi8, you might also want to consider expanding on your desires for a man and what you plan to do with him. If I was a man, I might be concerned that you would fillet me. You could also expand your possible first dates. Going to the Bass Pro Shop sounds like it could get expensive. Maybe you can describe a perfect day of bass fishing.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 51 (view)

date a girl who doesn't believe Dinosaurs existed? Posted: 9/2/2007 11:47:34 AM
the moon landing is A LOT more easy to blow holes into than the existence of dinosaurs. usually im not into silly things like aliens, ghosts, etc. but it is very convenient that we beat Russia to the moon during the height of the Cold War.... and haven't returned since. The explanation of why we haven't gone back to the moon is easy to explain. Although, this maybe somewhat irrelevant to this thread, it is relevant to dealing with people that have difficulty believing in factual things. The lunar landings were not a novelty for our government, they were a explorations to seek new resources and to leverage opportunities to become a super-power. This was a very expensive and risky project that President Kennedy fought to support. We got to the moon a few times and found that it did not have resources that we could use nor did it provide leveraging opportunities. Therefore, lunar travel could only be seen as a novelty that provides little gain. Perhaps modern technology will be able to detect lunar resources that we can use and maybe we will find a financial value in going again. Until then, it is just too expensive to visit the moon. Disbelief in dinosaurs is just absurd. That's like saying that man has only been on this planet for 5000 years and civilized for its entire existence or that the Holocaust didn't happen.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 26 (view)

What went wrong? Maybe a guy can answer... Posted: 8/26/2007 1:38:52 PM
I'm not a guy, but here's my take... It sounds like he waited until you were offline so that he could text you a goodbye note without having to hear what you had to say. There could be any number of reasons why he wanted to break off communication. Maybe he's married and his wife caught him using POF, so he had to quit. Or it could be that he had to go to prison. It is easier to think of why someone would want to have internet communication with somebody so far away. The odds of you two meeting are very low, you don't know anyone in his social network, so he won't get caught if he's up to no good, and he can keep his fantasies alive without risking any harm to his "real" contacts. Really, this is what it comes down to. Internet relationships are not "real" to a guy, so there are few risks and people can begin them and end them on a whim. You won't get an answer as to why he broke it off, but you do have a learning experience.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 4 (view)

Does my profile need a make over? Posted: 8/26/2007 1:13:40 PM
You should add interests to your "Interests" section. Just pick your top five. You look like a biker, are motorcycles and interest for you? You have photos of an theme park, do you like those? Do have any favorite activities that you like to share and can discuss? Add some paragraphing to to your "About Me" section. All of your text is jammed together. Don't copy another profile into this one. Edit the content as one profile that is really "about" you. Paragraphing in your "First Date" section would help too. Separate the different types of dates with paragraphs so that it doesn't look like one very busy date.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 51 (view)

I got into an insult fest with a woman and she still wants to meet up ? Posted: 8/26/2007 12:36:10 PM
The bottom line is, you're giving her attention with the "insult fest." She wants your attention and she's getting it, negative as it may be. Maybe she thinks that she'll win you over during the date and she can change your tune. Keep in mind though, that psychotic women are the types that become obsessed and use their vehicles as weapons or will try to damage the vehicle of the object of their obsession or use their vehicle to damage the other person's vehicle. So don't let her see what you drive or know where you live. But hey! Enjoy your "train wreck waiting to happen" date.

Sac_Pixie

Joined: 8/17/2007

Msg: 19 (view)

I have a question for everyone, all opinions welcome Posted: 8/26/2007 12:02:48 PM
I have never even heard of these expressions let alone said them. And no one is getting my whole paycheck. No matter how hot she is, LOL. What if the hot woman was loaded and paid all of the expenses and all you had to do was keep her happy? Would you give her your paycheck then?

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