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Thread: Being blocked?

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Being blocked? Posted: 9/28/2009 9:50:55 AM
Apologies if a repeat post...have trawled back through a couple of pages and couldnt see it. How do you know if you have been blocked by someone? I sent someone a message - I know she looked at my profile but now the message has been completely erased from my sent items - never seen this before.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

What are your messaging ratio's? Posted: 7/6/2009 11:05:53 AM
On this site. Both for sending and receiving messages (regardless of their quality or sincerity). I have sent approx 30 and received 1 response so: Sent 30/1 I have received 1 message (that was not a response to one i had sent) and replied to it so: Received 1/1. Interesting to see what people's ratio's are - think we know men and women's will be significantly different!

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

Something wrong with my profile? Posted: 7/5/2009 11:44:28 PM
2 responses from 20 mails is an above average ratio! In case you haven't seen it commented on in these forums there are far more blokes than girls and girls seem to be absolutely inundated with messages so they do not read all their messages and the more popular ones will respond to very few - its a numbers game. You need to talk about what sort of girl you are looking for (apart from not being a Giants fan!) Hope this helps mate.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

Please provide a profile review of my profile. Posted: 7/5/2009 2:57:33 PM
Hello mate. A couple of pointers for you - make sure your photo is zoomed in on you as there is a lot of background and your face isn't instantly visual. You obviously have some interests and hobbies and also some aspirations which is good but you made the same mistake that I did initially of not detailing who what type of person you are looking to meet. Hope this helps.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

Assistance please Posted: 7/5/2009 1:05:31 PM
Thank you very much Mondo for the very detailed advice - i agree the profile comes across much better now.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

Assistance please Posted: 7/5/2009 2:52:17 AM
Thank you for your feedback, and either side of the Atlantic is fine! I have updated my profile now - any further comments would be greatly received.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

lol,just wonder Posted: 7/4/2009 5:16:39 PM
To be honest the profile is a bit of a disaster. There are only a small percentage of girls on here who take drugs and even fewer who would admit to it so that would likely be an instant turn off for them. If that's part of your personality then good for you but its unlikely that you'll find many women on here who are interested. Additionally, your profile would indicate that there is not much substance to you - its as if you're saying that you're happy to do whatever a girl wants you to do and to talk about anything she wants to. A better way to explain this would be to say that "you have a wide knowledge of many subjects that you enjoy discussing". See the difference? Also, dont forget that you are 19 and that there will be very few women who are your age or younger - women assume that they are naturally maturer than men and so will not want to date anyone younger! (we of course know that this isn't true!) All the best mate.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

Please be brutally honest and specific Posted: 7/4/2009 5:07:40 PM
Hi Adrienne, My initial impression is that the sheer length of your profile is slightly overwhelming. If I was to open your profile I would think wow that's too much to read right now, I'll come back later once I've looked at a few more. It's always tempting to write a lot about yourself, particularly if your creative juices are flowing as you are typing but sometimes less is more and you could save a lot of the information you have given for mail exchanges which i'm sure you will be involved in. Personally, I would use the second picture of you as your primary photo as you look a lot younger in it and more attractve to us men, who are predominantly visually aroused! Hope this helps you. Gareth.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

How does my profile come off? Posted: 7/4/2009 5:00:24 PM
Hello mate, 2 main things: 1st - you need a picture with a close up of your face. The picture you have is a good one as a secondary photo but not as the primary. 2nd - what you write is very informative but i got lost trying to read it as its all too condensed and should be in about 3 or 4 different paragraphs. On an aside you may find that because of your age there will only be a small proportion of women who will respond to you, as they tend to like older men (they seem to think that they are far more maturer than us for some reason!)

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 24 (view)

I need a MAN's HONEST opinion...Ladies... You can tell it to me straight!! LOL! Posted: 7/4/2009 4:49:19 PM
Seems like a good profile to me. Nice, flattering picture that brings out your best physical features and a well rounded written account of yourself. I'm sure you will get some attention - it seems that there is a proportion of men/boys out there who just want to send suggestive emails, most women complain about this so don't take it personally, its just because you have a hint of clevage on display!

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

Do me a favor....please review my profile Posted: 7/4/2009 4:34:29 PM
Being another bloke I'm not sure I'm the ideal person to offer advice (also I seem to be having the same sort of problems!) but initially I would say the fact that your picture does not give a close up of your face is the first problem you have. You seem like an interesting person who has a job that women would be interested in but your paragraph is very brief and all the information is tightly condensed. There is a fine balance between writing too little and too much but i think you should elaborate and your profile a little more. Regards, Gareth.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

Review please Posted: 7/4/2009 4:28:10 PM
Hi there, I have taken a look at your profile and my over riding thought is that you will attract a specific type of man, with a specific set of hobbies and maybe there just aren't any who have read your profile yet. To be honest the first paragraph may well have been written in Russian as I would not have understood the jargon in a million years. Thats's not neccessarily a bad thing as someone who shares your interests would be impressed. However, that opening paragraph alone assures that you wont have a broad range of POF's reading on to the rest. Men are generally visually aroused so if we dont like the shop window we wont come inside. If you re-arrange the profile so that there is a general paragraph at the top detailing what you are looking for then you might be able to hook more people in. I have no doubt that somebody will read what you have written and think 'Wow' as you are clearly very outgoing and intelligent, but at the moment you are limiting the number of men that will find out about the real you. All the best.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Who is suited to Online dating? Posted: 7/4/2009 4:16:58 PM
Firstly, please forgive the fact that I have just returned home from the pub and feel in a philosophical mood! I was thinking about the qualities of a person who would be 'succesful' at online dating. Personally I have been using online dating (across various sites) for probably 5 years on and off. I went through a spell last year where I got about 12-15 dates, although they really didn't develop into anything (most were via mysinglefriend, and the others via Zoosk (Facebook) by the way); however, aside from that particular purple patch I receive a very low level of response to messages. Without counting I have probably sent about 50 messages through various sites (MSF, POF, Match, eharmony, Zoosk) without a single reply. Yet I know that, based on the advice on these forums, that I am constructing the right sort of message. It got me thinking that having trawled through these forums not many people seem to be getting a lot out of online dating. Certainly the people posting here, from both sides of the Atlantic and across genders and age groups, seem to be after the same sort of thing, yet are somewhat disillusioned by their experiences. Men generally moan that women dont reply to their messages and women complain that there are not enough genuine messages sent to them. So, is there a certain type of person who succeeds at Online dating? In the same way that different tennis players do better in different competitions, on different surfaces , is there a type of person that comes across better online? I suppose success is subjective, but based on my own situation, I use online dating, as a tool for finding a potential partner, because I'm not capable of approaching women in bars/clubs as I'm always far too conscious (regardless of alcoholic consumption) of myself. So, what I'd like to know is....do people on here who would regard themselves as 'successful online daters' (please define success - an email conversation, a date, a shag, an engagement etc) have much success in the real world too?

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

ok, how does this look? Posted: 7/4/2009 3:50:31 PM
If you're getting a 50% response then you're doing very well! We should be asking you for advice and not the other way around!

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 6 (view)

Assistance please Posted: 7/4/2009 3:47:53 PM
I feel a little embarrased to be bumping this to the top of the forum again but i would really appreciate some further feedback from more people regarding my profile. I am not getting any response from my messages, which is a little disheartening, as I take time to construct them so that it is obvious that they are specific to the girls I am writing to. Any profile tips will be much appreciated.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 4 (view)

What's the right amount of times to call? Posted: 7/4/2009 10:55:30 AM
From experience if you feel that you keep having to make the calls/texts/emails she's probably not that into you. For me, its an absolute maximum of 2 calls/texts/emails which if un-responded I move on.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

'Quality' of messages? Posted: 7/4/2009 10:53:16 AM
Girls, I wonder if you could answer something for me as I am curious: I often read in these forums that girls receive a lot of sex related messages and also a lot of short pointless ones i.e. "Wanna chat?" etc. What percentage of mails that you receive do you a) read and b) are nice messages that you would want to respond to? Additionally, I would be interested to know if there are any repetitive phrases that have you rushing for the "Next" button?

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 4 (view)

Assistance please Posted: 7/4/2009 10:49:10 AM
do people think the message or profile is the most important?

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 5 (view)

Is it my pictures or what Posted: 7/4/2009 5:35:39 AM
The pictures are definitely an issue. If you came up on a search I would skip right past yours as I'd have no idea what you look like and men are invariably visual comminicators. Your profile message, whilst short, is to the point and details what you are looking for but would benefit from being more spaced out.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

Males, can I get a profile review? Posted: 7/4/2009 5:29:48 AM
I quite like the "turn off's" section as it can be a great screening tool. I would suggest that maybe mentioning that you have mixed race children and your views on that, maybe include a picture of you with them as this will a) indicate that you have a children and b) that they are mixed race. If anyone has a problem with that then they wont look any further and skips a slightly delicate sentence which is difficult to phrase. Remember, a picture tells a thousand words. I recommend that you write a little more about yourself, i.e. your interests and hobbies etc as these will compliment nicely your likes and dislikes section which I think is a good thing. Hope this helps!

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 10 (view)

Need some help with my profile Posted: 7/4/2009 5:20:49 AM
It's a good profile. You're certainly someone with lots of interests and your own life which in my opinion is an attractive quality. My main feedback though is that you've possible written too much and that I don't get who you are in a nutshell. Maybe keep it a little more jovial too as the tone, coupled with the photo (which I know you are working on) comes off quite serious. Having said that I would guess that whilst you may receive fewer emails for having a more in depth statement you will hopefully find that you get higher quality messages (weirdo's/sex maniac's aside!) All the best.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 256 (view)

Online Dating Guide for Men: Part Deux Posted: 7/4/2009 5:11:23 AM
Some very interesting points of view. Whilst I agree with a lot of Woody's view's I did also find a lot of it quite patronising - I would have thought that 95% of that was basic common sense/good manners and would have been better expressed in the positive i.e. what to do instead of what not to do. Forgive me for skim reading much of the replies but Return of the Badboy's post was very good.

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

Assistance please Posted: 7/4/2009 4:41:26 AM
Thank you. Just noticed that...to be fair my jon really isn't very interesting

Joined: 8/19/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Assistance please Posted: 7/4/2009 4:29:18 AM
Hi, I've just come back to this site having used other dating websites, but immediately seem to have fallen into the same trap of not getting any responses to my messages. I wonder whether anyone would be kind enough to have a look at my profile and see if there is anything obviously wrong with it. I am realistic to know that to have received such a low (well none) level of responses says more about me than the girls I'm messaging so maybe there is something about my profile that is giving off completely the wrong vibes. whilst I clearly can't give any examples every message I send is personalised and specific to the person I'm sending it to, I only message local women and you'll have to take my word that I'm not sending 'sex' messages! Any feedback would be greatly appreciated! Thank you.

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