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apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 114 (view)

Sensuality in your 50's..... Posted: 7/26/2008 7:10:51 AM
OK - all I can do is ask this question . . . where does menopause fit into this equation? If you have more of a sexual nature does the effects hit less? This isn't a crack but it seems that some women hit the onset and lose their shape and their interest and that's that.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 41 (view)

The procedure 11 years after Posted: 5/31/2008 3:50:22 AM
My experience was almost comedic. After three kids, the decision was a no-brainer. The Dr. stuck me with 15 cc's Valium in the arm which, didn't hurt. I commented to him about that and he said the trick is not rub the area with alcohol first (I guess the sterilization thing is over rated?). Anyway, about 11 seconds later he could have used a chainsaw and it wouldn't have mattered. Then, he and the other doctor he had observe (I guess for malpractice reasons) start telling jokes about when they had there's and they don't know why because their wives never put out anyway . . . very funny experience. It ended, I went across the street to the bar, ordered a drink, called a cab for a ride home and never gave it another thought. I took the two stitches out myself a few days later. I will say for those who are considering it, do as I did and ask around for a recommendation. I know of guys who had much less laughable experiences. The only downside and the women I've known since might argue . . . I used to shoot much bigger loads.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 29 (view)

staying with him/her even though your not in-love? Posted: 5/16/2008 8:17:39 PM
You already know the answer. The problem is you're not ready to do anything about it. Being on a dating site in hopes of Prince Charming to come and whisk you away isn't a great strategy but I've had worse. Having him catch you cheating is less desirable than being honest and you'll wind up in the same place if he does and hurt him more. Trust me, I'm not being critical but you need a better plan. One word of free advise (always worth the price paid) don't have any kids - he/she or they will wind paying all the dues.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 27 (view)

The Key Issue Posted: 5/16/2008 7:50:42 PM
There's a great old Harry Chapin song, goes . . . "I know I've got a life time but I've got it all figured out, everybody's lonely, that's what its all about . . ." Peace out

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 247 (view)

Why Do So Many Women Require That I Must Love God? Posted: 5/16/2008 7:37:00 PM
Did anyone see the HBO special series on Porn. One of the questions was, "do relationships in the business last?" They interviewed this couple that married in their late teens, immediately ran off to do missionary for work in Alaska then, went to South Central LA for more missionary work but eventually ended up staring in and producing porn and ran a successful business. They were married for 25 years and looked happy. Maybe we need to look at religion in a new light?

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 52 (view)

Embarassment... has this ever happen to you? Posted: 5/16/2008 7:05:17 PM
All I want to know is "schmoopy" a real word?

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 17 (view)

Asking you to look at naughty pics? Posted: 5/10/2008 5:44:24 AM
I think you have to assume that a guy that expects you to view explicit material isn't thinking of taking you home to meet his mother any time soon. On a brighter note - it's probably good that only women can have a part of their body enlarged, if men could they'd have to redesign mens pants.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 21 (view)

How much do your REALLY want to know when breaking up? Posted: 5/10/2008 4:22:47 AM
The mystery of what brings two people together can be the same mystery that drives them apart and somethings are better left that way. The advantage of having been in a failed relationship is knowing that some do just fail - doesn't have to be anyones fault.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 29 (view)

Going for a woman in a relationship Posted: 5/8/2008 5:20:22 AM
a) patience is a virtue b) I wouldn't set you eggs down it.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 313 (view)

18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man? Posted: 5/8/2008 5:11:20 AM
The issue isn't today, it is tomorrow. The younger spouse reaches their forties and feels as though they are taking care of a parent, they feel tied down as the older spouse slows down and the older spouse can't help but wonder how they are holding the younger one back. On the best of days relationships are work, to make it harder with an age, race , nationality or religious difference adds to the work. I think the bigger issue is how will these differences affect any resulting children. I'm not expressing exclusivity in sameness in relationships but life is what it is. We have a tendency to live in the moment . . . I'm not promoting arranged marriages but there is an argument for the voice of wisdom. peace-out.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 29 (view)

barbara walters admits to having had an affair with a married congressman Posted: 5/6/2008 3:25:21 AM
I believe the article/interview stated that he was now retired and on his second marriage. I still believe it was information that two needed to consent to before being revealed. I think there was some soul cleansing involved with a little shock value (he was the first black senator). For someone like this it is a career move, for the rest of us, not keeping your personal life, personal, is classless.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 86 (view)

New study shows that men can't read women Posted: 5/3/2008 4:02:13 AM
Maybe I missed it in this thread but the study also went on to say that women are better then men but still not very good at it either. In addition, men are likely as well to misinterpret a come-on for being friendliness (not as frequently of course). At the end of the day, people believe what they want to believe. I think women have an advantage in that the veneer covering men in their interest in sex is noticeably thinner than in women. My current chuckle and for anyone working in a large corporation can identify with, the anti-hostile workplace rules where it is inappropriate to flirt with a woman, unless she's interested? I figure don't assume and "Denile" is not just a river in Egypt.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 34 (view)

Things progressing - sex - no phone call for 3 days Posted: 11/8/2007 2:36:14 PM
If you could somehow save sex like money and use all the unspent sex at some point in life, later on, I might buy into some of the waiting idea (STDs, etc. notwithstanding). As for the times a woman asked me to wait and I did and it wasn't worth it. I genuinely feel that people who wait have lower sex drives and don't really appreciate it because their bodies and minds aren't wired that way. Waitng is easier for some than others - that's a fact! It doesn't make either party wrong, frigid, promiscuous or more or less virtuous, you just are, it just is. As for the idea of being used - it will never happen if you don't assume some other expectation. Live a little for each day as there may not be a tomorrow. JMHO

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 6 (view)

Why use the word nice instead of another word? Posted: 11/8/2007 1:57:41 PM
It may have something to do with the average person having a 600 word vocabulary. Not that the average number of words a person knows isn't greater, it's just they get by with 600. If 1/3 are either swear words or slang descriptions of parts of the human form . . . that doesn't leave a lot of room for extra adjectives to describe one's personality.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 31 (view)

How did the social changes of the 70's influence who you are today? Posted: 11/3/2007 6:03:45 AM
I was so wasted . . . To this day it amazes me my kids don't have two heads, each! For my mother, a divorced woman . . . she refused to shop at JC Pennies because they refused to give a divorced woman a credit card. As for counter culture/materialism thing. . . I like to think of the line from the movie where the guy commits suicide and his friends spend the weekend together - no one told us we were going to make all this money. I was four years shy of draft age for Viet Nam - when my friends and I would be sitting and passing the bong we would shake our heads in wonder, in stoned horror to be in the setting except, rather than in a basement but a jungle with a rifle along side. Aside from Kennedy being shot - I think the other real deflowering of our innocence was the reality that the govt of the people, by the people and for the people - lied to us through their teeth and it seems old habits die hard.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 43 (view)

How Far is to FAR Posted: 10/26/2007 12:50:57 PM
Somehow your friend has had her self esteem eroded way past the point of reason. Not having a job has added to this: A) Get job. B) launch b/f out door. C) Chalk the whole thing up to experience. D) Get on with life.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 73 (view)

is a sense of humour really that important to people as much as they say? Posted: 10/26/2007 12:41:21 PM
It's only funny until someone gets hurt - then it's hilarious!

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 42 (view)

High sex-drive/Low sex-drive. Can it work in a relationship? Posted: 10/26/2007 12:23:25 PM
Imagine life with a white elephant in the room at all times, it gets old having to walk around it all the time.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 482 (view)

The Sex Mistake Posted: 10/26/2007 12:12:38 PM
Hmm . . . one article and twenty pages later - I'm still missing something, several somethings . . . When did it become so hard for a woman to get a man's attention? A woman has to elude to promises of near term sugar plums to get a man to know she's alive? What happened to talking about the weather, a latest movie, new or old music? Say, 'hello' we say 'hello' back. Jeez, learn what it is to be a guy once in a while - finding a conversation starter - keeping the conversation flowing - not looking like you're single-minded, hormone-ragging, neaderthal. If you're looking an LTR or to hide the salami - make up you mind and act accordingly - look to see if the person has the qualities you see yourself living with the rest of your life, not sleep with them then sort it all out. You women have such an advantage - you know we're thinkin' about sex (well sometimes sports but mostly sex), we haven't got a flippin' clue what is on your minds. Move past the shallow end and see what is in the deep (but possibly narrow) end of the pool. Last but not least - IMHO - my pet saying - people are in different places in their lives at different times and people get married for all kinds of reasons - not the least of which is they 'want to be married' , they want to be in a committed relationship. If they don't, HELLO, don't get into it with the idea you'll change them, you'll make to otherwise happy (but lonely) people - unhappy and lonely. Steps down from soap box, bows to the sleeping audience and slinks away. (one month? I can do that standing on my head!)

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 21 (view)

A first for me Posted: 10/26/2007 11:23:48 AM
What is the absolute worst that could happen? The spins off its axis and spirals out of control into the sun? Famine and pestilence fill the land? The Polar ice caps melt (OK - you got me there)? Probably not - the worst that could happen is you two might feel akward around each other for a few weeks - maybe months? What's the best - you live happily ever after! I don't know of any better risk/reward than that.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 34 (view)

contacting an ex Posted: 10/26/2007 10:51:13 AM
Every story's end is a new story's begining. Start your new one, man.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

what is her problem Posted: 10/26/2007 10:44:45 AM
A 'bunny boiler' - ROFLMAO!

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

the bear and the rabbit. Posted: 10/26/2007 10:35:22 AM
an oldie but a goodie!

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 24 (view)

She writes long emails, is he interested? Posted: 10/26/2007 10:32:28 AM
Some people are just very profecient typists.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

Serial Dating On This Site Posted: 10/26/2007 10:14:25 AM
As in getting more than one date - that happens?

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 19 (view)

Courtesy sex Posted: 10/26/2007 10:12:03 AM
There was a great old movie with Burt Renolds (sp?, looks wrong) and Sally Fields - I think Burt is dying and he goes to see Sally Fields for a Pity F . . . the scene is hysterical and puts the whole subject in perspcetive.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 24 (view)

Do you think men and women are changing places? Posted: 10/26/2007 10:06:15 AM
I watched an older couple - the man was casually speaking about some task and doubting his ability to complete it. His wife, while preoccupied with something else entirely, out of the corner of her ear hears this. She throughs him this little scrap of a reassuring compliment and the huband is ready to take on the world. I don't think woman today are able to do this - certainly the men are certainly still ready to receive it. A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. JMHO

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 48 (view)

guys and porn Posted: 10/26/2007 9:54:33 AM
Well done - AFF is for short term romances with lots of instant gratification. I can't comment on his involement (obviously) but asking him about wanting "open" up your relationship is a sure way to square your relationship away with him - a lot of reality sets in when you start to condsider your partner hitting "Hi-C" with someone else and there is always a line of men waiting to volunteer for a woman. Good communicating!!!

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 14 (view)

Would you date a woman who has problems at work? Posted: 10/26/2007 9:39:58 AM
It would depend - some people (women in this thread) are consumed by their job/work. That can leave very little time for them to pay attention to their SO. They may have the best of intentions but . . . As the saying goes - ignore your customers, they'll go away.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 47 (view)

yup... another on first date sex Posted: 10/25/2007 9:42:27 AM
I don't see what the big deal is either way (Note 1: STDs notwithstanding). If everyone is being honest while they're there, where's the harm. How entitled is someone to know about your sexual history? They're not (again, see Note 1)! Not to denegrade the romance or emotion involved but c'mon, catching a woman at the right time of the month for her changes your odds from night to day. All part of the getting lucky formula for guys. The last woman I slept with on a first date - I married. How it started and where it went had nothing to do with each other.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 48 (view)

money inside the bra Posted: 10/25/2007 9:13:16 AM
I don't really see a problem with - It really depends on how the money is retreaved - it could be a real turn on if done with class. In thinking about it - If I was sitting alone at a beach bar on a tropical island and woman in a two-piece bathing suit walked up to the bar and offered to buy me a drink and then pulled either cash or a credit card out of the top of her suit - I'd marry her on the spot. Of course, I'd have the bartender perform the ceremony!

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 34 (view)

Guys with a three day growth of beard . . . Posted: 10/25/2007 8:36:34 AM
Well, I'm glad I asked! I must shave 350 days/year with with an old fashioned double edge razor (so, much closer than a quatro -whatever) and trim my mustache every other day. Like msg 30 said, I just don't feel clean otherwise. Well, at least I know why my Friday nights are so available!

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 54 (view)

Would listing my standards be bitchy? Posted: 10/22/2007 2:36:30 PM
OP, For the guys that read a woman's profile I think we appreciate someone not wasting our time - The height/weight thing for example. For what ever the reason if we're not your speed - why bother. Lowering your standards only equates to compromising. When you don't compromise the only person you have to blame is yourself on Saturday night, the person that didn't quite measure up. As for rejecting someone - I always find the blah, blah, good luck in your search to be fair.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Guys with a three day growth of beard . . . Posted: 10/19/2007 12:42:16 PM
I've wondered this . . . you see those otherwise hunks of a male that need a shave. Is that sexy? It makes me think of a woman who goes out on a date and doesn't shave her legs as a protectorite from being intimate, yet they show guys with a scratchy beard. well, as a guy I don't want to kiss him . . . as a woman, do you?

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 21 (view)

ever date an on going arguement. Posted: 10/19/2007 6:48:17 AM
I love people like that . . . they're sooooooooooooo much fun to ignore, it drives them nuts!!! Then when you've had enogh fun with that, go out of your way to let them know their opinion doesn't matter. As they're about to explode simply say, "don't go away mad, just go away!"

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 41 (view)

Worst clothes to wear on a first date... Posted: 10/19/2007 6:40:20 AM
Women with a few extra pounds in jeans that are just too darn tight. I'm worried when they eat, they will explode. I understand we all go thtrough periods of weight loss or weight gain and we don't always have the time or resources to update our wardrobes accordingly but you must have somethig in your closet besides sweatpants that will fit more comfortably.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 77 (view)

at what age was sex the best? Posted: 10/19/2007 6:22:33 AM
Any age where you wake up and draw a breath.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 59 (view)

Re: Mutual/group masturbation Posted: 10/19/2007 6:19:48 AM
I think I've asked every woman I've ever been intimate with If I could watch them. I was always shy of the idea of being watched and wondered if a woman would really want to see me do it. No woman has ever brought it up - I don't ask.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 17 (view)

not that into me Posted: 10/18/2007 12:19:51 PM
The sooner you change your behavior the sooner you can move on and you need to move on.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 21 (view)

Would you date a girl with family drama? Posted: 10/18/2007 12:14:15 PM
It depends to the extent it is self-inflicted - the extent that it's real and the impact to our sex life.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 29 (view)

Is a guy being Bi just gay in your eyes? Posted: 10/18/2007 11:29:45 AM
I can't take credit for it as someone else said it. Sexuality is a preference. As in I prefer one versus the other. Your preference may be 100% and you'll never vary from that. However, if someone has a prefernece for both that is what they have.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 24 (view)

Can men just be friends with women? (Activity Partner) Posted: 10/18/2007 11:01:37 AM
Yes, I have several. Of course I think about sex regularly - it never includes them - I'm willing to bet the revesre is true with them but I wouldn't know as we don't go 'there'.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 24 (view)

Do Christian Women Scare You Off ??? Posted: 10/18/2007 10:54:17 AM
OMG, yeah! I dated one in high school and I still have nightmares!!! I'm not a huge John Lenon fan as I know some people are but "Imagine no religion . . .nothing to kill or die for . . ." Someone else sang (forgive me I forget who, 2nd thing to go is the memory), "How many people have died in the name of Christ . . ." I'm not promoting the philosphy of a popular song over belief in a higher being, however, there a lot of people out their claiming to have the one true relgion, well . . . hmm . . .

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 69 (view)

I don't get it , why people don't put pics up. Posted: 10/18/2007 10:17:50 AM
Not putting up a pic gives two people a chance to discover each other and slowly - so there is some courtship, wooing, romance - it says I'm special - I'm worth you taking your time to get to know. Once you've exchaged some emails and want to pursue the path from intelectual to attraction to emotional, a pictue becomes a logical progression. In any event a picture like a profile can be made as geniune or false as the individual intends. I just don't like my picture being on the 'net'. I don't feel I can accurately estimate the downside and if a woman doesn't like what I have to say - what will it matter what I look like?

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 22 (view)

Refusing your kiss... Posted: 10/17/2007 12:56:44 PM
Enlightning, I didn't realize other people were like this? My XSO was the same way - I assumed she was unique in that regard, hmm . . . I don't feel any better for knowing but knowledge is good.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 14 (view)

Could you date a person who's opinion you don't respect? Posted: 10/17/2007 12:49:29 PM
Could I? No. I want a strong, independent woman. If I wanted a woman to hover over and make myself feel superior, sure. I think it's all in what you're looking for. One statistic I love to throw out on such occasions is: on average the highter the education a person has the less sex they will have. "Education doesn't cost, it pays." . . . let's rethink that one a little . . . My other fav is - a person's inteligence depends as much on where they're standing as it does on what they're sayin'. What does a guy on Wall Street know about growing corn?

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 52 (view)

Can a pretty girl have brains too? Posted: 10/17/2007 12:34:06 PM
She better because one day she won't be pretty any more and the guy that went after the wrapping will realize what was in the box wasn't so special. As is said: there's no such thing as a dumb blond.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

Don't find this guy attractive but he loves me to death Posted: 10/17/2007 12:27:50 PM
Tell him your interested in someone else (the truth is you probably are whether or not you're actively pursuing it, right?). It drives the point home mercifully and quickly and does not lead to a debate. You haven't rejected him you've chosen someone else. I know it's a lie but I think it accomplishes your goal of sparing his feelings.

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 22 (view)

Endearing terms before meeting? Posted: 10/17/2007 11:53:53 AM
I know people that use them and don't mean anything by it and don't offend people. I don't because I know I react to it and worry that others will as well. I do enjoy "my precious pet" after I've known someone a while. Heck - it worked for Rhett!

apocalypso

Joined: 8/22/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

Is there any way to read them better? Posted: 10/17/2007 11:44:04 AM
Make some assumptions: 1. They're interested in sex. 2. They probably drink more than they say. 3. If they're well groomed, articulate and listen when you speak - they're probably gay. 4. TV sports is a religion - you know this is true as there are fees associated. 5. They're lonely just like you. Lower you're expectations but not your standards and you'll never be disapointed.

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