MAY 24th *POF Meet & Greet at O’Sullivan's Restaurant and Bar* chat & forums.

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Thread: MAY 24th *POF Meet & Greet at O’Sullivan's Restaurant and Bar*

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 112 (view)

MAY 24th POF Meet & Greet at O’Sullivan's Restaurant and Bar Posted: 5/17/2009 11:30:30 PM
Shiggles64 wrote : "We could go to a larger venue, but O'Sully's is the perfect size for our Meet & Greets - big enough to accommodate us and small enough that we don't get lost. " This is ONLY a humble suggestion, but... has anyone considered Glenn's Job Site near Sunridge in the NE for any of these events? 1) It's a good-sized venue, perhaps only a bit larger than Sully's (or maybe just appears that way?) if not the same, and it's a very simple layout - no getting lost! (And speaking of getting lost, no worries with finding it even if you've never been - it's easy to find & get to) ; 2) With the karaoke racket at the far/rear end, and the "quieter" section with the VLTs near the immediate entrance, the latter makes it easier for those wishing to socialize and converse do so with greater ease than trying to do so amidst the music and "singing" (lol) ; 3) It's not as crazy-insane busy and packed on Fridays and Saturday nights (well, nowhere near to the degree as Sully's) ; 4) It's also a bit of a "in all fairness" courtesy to us NE dwellers who may not have the luxury of their own transport, so the odds of actually being able to attend one of these increases considerably by being closer to home in the NE. 5) The place rocks. So that's my 2¢... hope everyone who attends has a good time. WTW

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

Singles Night 80's Style- Calgary Posted: 11/8/2007 8:46:10 PM
Oh man this is SO custom made for me! 80s? Karaoke? I am SO there! WTW

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 22 (view)

I need some advice! Posted: 11/8/2007 6:24:01 PM
The guy sounds like a liar and all-round sleaze. He was rushing the relationship with you cos he wanted the nookie. You didn't give it to him, so he probably eventually found it elsewhere (evident by the other dating sites etc), especially if he suddenly backed off and left the ball of "intimacy initiation" in your court - he probably found someone else to play ball with, but was also making sure to keep his game available on your court too. The guy is pig. A liar. A player and manipulator. Kick his ass to the curb and cut your losses. Move on, find someone else. You deserve better than what he's (not?) giving you. That's my advice. Heed it, or don't. But know that I know all. WTW

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 90 (view)

Why do men feel the need to bring up sex during your first conversation Posted: 10/28/2007 9:13:51 PM
Well, calgaryangel, it actually happens both ways ; I can't begin to tell you how many times I've had women voluntarily tell me their breast size. Like I'm supposed to be immediately impressed or something? I did not ask them, nor did I even hint at wanting to know. I may have asked them what they look like, but I am only expecting the usual height/weight (or general body type description in lieu of a weight figure), hair & eye color, etc. Yet they seem to include their bra size - and often it's the list-topper, before anything else. And not to stereotype anyone in any way, but I find more often than not, the larger or fuller-figured women tend to do this. And if they're not larger in size, then just in ego - and that's where the really trampy sorts come in. So, yeah - some women have the same compulsion to offer the sales pitch on their goods too. And anyone who does this (be they men or women) either think that because they themselves place such a priority value on such attributes that EVERYONE else must also, OR, they simply realize on some level that they probably don't have a whole lot else to offer, so they resort to the one thing "everyone wants" ; carnal treasures - big dumbsticks and huge funbags. But I, for one, am NOT one of those guys who offers my phallic stats. If you wanna know, then ask, and I will tell. But otherwise, the only sex talk you will get out of me is in the form of innuendoes and other attempts at humor.... unless you specifically request otherwise, lol. WTW

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 122 (view)

My BOYFRIEND wants to wait for marriage to have sex. Posted: 10/18/2007 8:59:49 PM
Sorry. BJ is SEX. What you have is him getting his jollies and you not getting yours. You wanna MARRY this guy? So he goes out and has fun, but you get to stay home with 3 screaming kids? The money gets spent on something HE wants, regardless of what you want or maybe even need? I'm sorry to have to say this sweetie, but sexual selfishness( which is EXACTLY what's going on here) usually is a good indicator of selfishness in other aspects of couplehood. Stop letting him use you. Either waiting means you BOTH wait( and oral sex IS sex!!) or you both don't. I suspect when the BJs stop, your Prince Charming is gonna turn into a frog... Cindy O THIS woman has nailed it square on the head! And to the other lady who suggested the guy might "just be smart", so as no not impregnate you? HAH! Yeah, he is smart alright, as in "manipulative". He's getting his bone smoked - that's all he care about. he hides behind bullshit like "morals" and other socially accepted lies to excuse and even condone his selfishness. Seems a large majority of people here have it right : Cut him OFF, and/or DITCH his selfish ass. And to all you homophobes who automatically called the gay card, YOU are "gay" for suggesting such a stupid notion. I mean, he very well might be, for all anyone knows, but to just knee-jerk to that conlcusion, it's ignorant. Grow up, or offer some substantial logic and reason to support your claim (as some, but not too many here, have done). So let it be written, so let it be done.... doggie style. WTW

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 58 (view)

My BOYFRIEND wants to wait for marriage to have sex. Posted: 10/15/2007 5:39:54 AM
I've been with him for a year and a half and it's already posing problems and small fights. You don't need an anvil dropped on your head - if something as crucial to a happy & successful relationship as sex is causing trouble, then cut your losses and find someone more compatible. It's one thing to bicker about money or leaving a toilet seat up, or even sex (IF the issue is about when and how long to have it) - but if you're at polar opposite points of view about the whole "no-sex-til-marriage" thing or whatever, then forget it - that's a matter of personal values over personal preferences, and for either of you to change your values is a compromise where no one wins. Bail. i love him and i want to marry him. You probably thought/said this about past boyfriends, even if only for a fleeting moment. You will do so again with future beaus. I suggest you let go of this stupid fantasy and leave it to chance - if you get married, great, if not, so what? It aint the end of the world. Live in the NOW, not for tomorrows that may never come. Too much emphasis is put on this whole marriage thing anyway, and because of that, so many relationships self-destruct cos of all the expectations & pressures that come with it. Put fairy tales away with your dolls - you're a big girl now. everything else about him is almost perfect. "Almost" aint good enough. I settled for "almost" and "close enough", and 8 wasted years later, I finally woke up - but by then it was too damn late ; I was an old (late 20s/early 30s) "geezer" whom no woman wanted, especially with all the young studs around. Don't screw yourself just cos your b/f won't - FIND A BETTER MATCH for yourself! but our views of sex are completley different. Okay, maybe you DO need an anvil on your head. That's a hint-and-a-half for you! Views on sex can rarely be altered, especially by an outside influence. Any change of heart has to come from within, and it doesn't sound like he's gonna budge. as if i'm the guy! i always think about sex. i like porn. i like sex! What's your number? i've had boyfriends before that love sex. i love sex! and he doesn't. i have a high sex drive! Seriously now... what's your number? he hasn't even ever gone down on me. even though i do for him. Well screw that noise. What kind of double standard is that? Seriously girl, find yourself a good ole-fashioned horny MAN, and rid yourself of this candyassed little boy who's probably scared of his own erection. and every time we do stuff in bed it leaves me INCREDIBLY frustrated. doing sexual stuff with him is just BLAH! And if this continues (your frustration) you will inevitably be compelled to cheat. Even if you "would NEVER do that", believe me, sexual frustration can make the most moral people do things they never thought they would ever do (sexually). and i've talked to him many many times about this. and things never change. Unless you're an 80s metal music fan, stop banging your head against the wall and get a clue. He is either a manipulative little schemer trying to not be one of those guys who is at the mercy of his g/f (who typically governs the sex), or he is a PRUDE. Either way, it's bullshit, and you deserve better. Leave him to his purist notions or whatever his deal is, and get out there and get you a man who can get your chimes ringing. sexual compalibility is important! I thought I said that already? i don't know what to do :( i can't marry for at least 4 years (so i can finish school) and i don't think i can wait that long to have sex!!!! DON'T WAIT! Leave his ass. If you're "schooling" is college, then jeez, experience the true college rites of passage already, and date and/or have sex with (selectively) random guys (and/or girls, lol) til you find someone who does it for you. Whatever you do, BE HAPPY already. Life is too damn short to "wait" for anything, dammit. WTW

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 79 (view)

Friends only - mixed messages? Posted: 10/9/2007 10:40:53 PM
LOL! That's clever, svj! Although I take exception to the "Other relationship" for men - neither cuffs, jello, nor sheep interest me. Everything else though sounds pretty accurate, lol. WTW

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 77 (view)

Friends only - mixed messages? Posted: 10/9/2007 3:14:22 PM
Maybe I am a cynic - okay, no "maybe" about it ; I AM a cynic, especially where "love" and romance are concerned - but I think the whole "friends first" thing is, more often than not, a waste of time and a potential act of potential relationship sabotage (at least it is to the one who may wish to be more than friends at some point). Someone suggested that whatever someone lists in their profile as their reason(s) for being here ("Friends", "Dating", etc), that indicates the END RESULT of what that person is here for ; and I agree. Hence, if you list yourself seeking "Friends", then that pretty much implies that you are seeking platonic relationships only. "Dating", in my opinion, kind of comes with the assumption that you'll start out as friends anyway, but with the potential for something more evolving later, if the "dating" continues. And if you feel you fall somewhere in a gray area between the any of the given options, then you need to clarify such in your profile and not just assume or hope others will know the difference. But maybe that's just me? I listed myself as seeking "Other relationship", which to me pretty much suggests that I'm looking for something other than the norm, something that desn't really have a category or definitive label. Yet somehow that option is construed by many people (judging by the criteria noted in their profiles of what they are NOT looking for) as a bad thing, as bad as looking ofr one-night-stands, purely phyiscal flings, affairs, or booty calls (FWBs). Well pardon me for not wanting what others want, especially if it's somehow "expected" the "decent" thing of me. I resent being written off as some sex-crazed perv JUST cos I don't want the complicated ties of a stupid relationship, which is all about some stupid social status anyway. Aside from not really knowing what I am looking for right now (I'm gonna let what happens happen), I am not all hung up on this whole "friends first" crap. Everytime I've tried that, I somehow always missed that exit that lets me get onto the "more than friends / couple" highway. And no one would think to give a slightly naive, overall oblivious to "signals" person like myself any indication that the ONE AND ONLY exit was approaching. And there is never any way to double back to that exit - in other words, once you pass a certain point in the "friends zone", there's no going back. I dunno about all guys, but I am very dense when it comes to "reading signals" or whatever. I have no natural instincts for this. I need a blunt message if you wanna get your point across to me ; if you like me, say so.. if not, then also say so, and don't dance around it, just spit it out. A reason for why not might be appreicated though, in case it appears to me as coming outta left field. I think someone in this thread may have mentioned that once you're in the "friends zone" it's almost impossbile to get out of it and go further from there. SO TRUE! And doesn't that completely contradict the point of being friends first in the building of a relationship? "Oh, I don't think we should risk the friendship - let's just stay friends!" - what!? Sure it's a risk, but isnb't that what all the romantics out there preach as their mantra? "No risk, no reward" kind of thing? Yet all I hear is how once you;ve become such good friends, you've blown any possibility to be more than that. To me it sounds utterly ridiculous that you can actually be "too good" of friends for a relationship. "Mixed messages" indeed!! Basically, you get hit with that contradicting crap where you either are not yet "friends ENOUGH" to pursue anything more, or you are "TOO GOOD of friends" and the other person doesn't wanna risk messing it up. That latter one, in my book, is just the politically correct way of saying "I'm not interested in you THAT way". Well, why not just SAY that? Damn political correctness crap. In your pretentious effort to spare my widdle feewings and save face for yourself (so as not t oappear superficial or shallow), you've wasted my time trying to be "friends first" just so I could have my shot at something special with you. Thanks a lot. Saying "I don't date trolls, but I have nothing against being their friend" may have been a bit brutally blunt, but would have saved me not only a lot of my time, but also would have saved me from entertaining silly notions and conjuring hopes that I might actually find something "special" with someone like you (and thus the birth of eternal cynicism comes to pass). I would have appreciated a memo beforehand stating that there was this very SMALL window of transitional opportunity, between knowing each other well enough and being too good of friends (that might "risk ruining up the friendship") which would allow for such a progressive change. Again, it's polictically-correct crap. I say, if you like someone, then screw that "friends first before anything more" nonsense - tell them and get on with the show. If you DON'T like someone "that way", then tell them so - but if at all possible, employ a litte tact (not pc-laden, patronizing / condescending bull$hit) in telling them they are not your type, and platonic is the extent of your association with them. If you are gonna get to know someone, then bloody well get to KNOW them, and that means in EVERY capacity, including the physical. Sexual compatibility is just as important and a key factor to a successful long-lasting relationship as anything else - so why is treated like the final exam? It oughta be the first order of business ; if you two rock in bed, then everything else is gravy, baby. If you two are not compatible, then it aint gonna matter if you both have a love for puppies and a passion for mountain climbing - the sex will suck, you will feel unfulfilled, and hence cheating / straying will follow. Or just a break-up. And talk about a waste of time. It only takes a couple of encounters to establish sexual compatibility, whereas it can take months to get to "know" someone personality-wise. Let's stop making sex out to be this "sacred" thing, something that's made out to be more than it actually is, thanks to all the outside influence and (I will say it) brainwashing (or "social conditioning" if you prefer a softer term) from church, state, family, and friends. These influneces have us living in fear of "becoming a slut" or some other unpleasant characterization based on one's sexual activity. So we either deny ourselves what we'd probably like to do (jump somone's bones, for the sheer pleasure of it, if not for relationship assessment purposes) ; or we do it anyway and then lie about it, fooling ourselves that it was "more meaningful" than it really was, and it just "happened" to go south "unexpectedly", or whatever. FWB is probably the way I wanna go for myself right now. But it is proving an almost impossible feat cos while I see and hear of others doing this FWB thing (as well as other very loose-and-liberated relationships), I can't seem to find it, cos everyone I encounter is professing these ridiculous "friends first" / "no one night stands" notions, despite the fact they are probably doing those things anyway in thier delusional pursuit for some "true love" propaganda. "Friends"... "You can never have too many friends"... pfft! I have dozens of friends of the purely-platonic nature ; I don't need any more "friends" unless they come with "benefits". Sorry, but that's how I feel. I spent 8 years in common-law-relationship hell, and I have no interest going back (ever!), nor playing those stupid "commited relationship" games with rules that just conflict and contradict not only themselves, but human nature too. I didn't mean to offend anyone's values or beliefs. I just came on to make a couple points, express a couple of opinions, and the damn soapbox came out. Typical of me though. Cheers to all. I truly hope you do find what you're looking for out there. WTW

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 5 (view)

Vanishing Content Posted: 10/6/2007 8:29:22 AM
I wanted to use some kind of bullets, but the Alt+0149 bullet wasn't showing up (along with dozens of other Alt+code characters). The Alt+0164 symbol (whatever it is) is one of the few that worked. Thanks for the links - I will keep them in mind for future use. WTW

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 4 (view)

Vanishing Content Posted: 10/6/2007 8:26:35 AM
Ahhh, ok - I will try that! Thanks! WTW

Joined: 9/9/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Vanishing Content Posted: 10/5/2007 11:33:30 PM
Why the hell does my profile content keep disappearing? My headline and the stuff in the two main boxes (About Me Description, and the First Date Description) Are always blank whe nI log back in later. My Interests box and other specs remain untouched, as they were. I DO NOT include personal contact info, lewd words or images, or anything else that might be considered inappropriate content. I am getting sick of having to repost the content (good thing I save everything in Notepad files) over and over and over. WTW

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