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Thread: How is the rose working for us old farts?

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 60 (view)

How is the rose working for us old farts? Posted: 3/9/2008 5:24:24 AM
Haven't received any, nor sent them. I think they're waaaaaay to cheesy.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 538 (view)

Are women marketable after age 30? Posted: 3/9/2008 1:05:28 AM
I'm wondering how the heck threads like these don't get deleted. OMG.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 16 (view)

Can you date a feminine guy? Posted: 3/8/2008 4:04:04 AM
LOL. I had an ex (is a clinical psychologist) who loved the fact I was very in touch with my feminine side. However, I'd get a lot of gay guys looking my way (they misread my 'sensitivity' for something else), and she felt a bit uncomfortable about that. Hell, I can turn on the macho side easily enough, too. Grrrr .... Situational chameleon.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 443 (view)

The illusion of online dating Posted: 3/6/2008 11:53:25 PM
Oh, I dunno. The experience of online dating is as real as I want it to be. Times change, and this form of meeting someone will be commonplace before long. In fact, if I go to a gathering of people these days, it's unusual to find someone between the ages of 25-50 who has not had some experience of it. It's real, in my opinion. I've met some beautiful people through it, and my life has been enriched because of online dating sites, but not solely because of it. It helps to keep the proper perspective and remember it all really begins with a real person in front of you.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 97 (view)

Sorry Hun, I'm Pregnant... Posted: 3/5/2008 3:23:27 AM
Those are words I'll never hear again - that much is certain, lol.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 19 (view)

Being in the psych field Posted: 3/3/2008 5:10:42 AM
I'm studying psych, and have had one or two raised eyebrows, but after the initial surprise inevitably comes a torrent of questions. People actually WANT to talk, I've found. I had a girlfriend who was a clinical psych, and have dated one or two that also were in that field, and I don't believe that MOST psychs entered the field because they wanted to sort themselves, contrary to popular opinion/myth. I think that the people who enter this field naturally are inclined to be keen observers, of both themselves and others, and are therefore more inclined to think deeply, and may APPEAR troubled. No, I don't see it as a liability. More of an asset, really.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 6 (view)

Queen of the first date... Posted: 3/3/2008 2:54:08 AM
To the OP: First off, you live in Australia, and to top it off, in a region that has only 1 million people. Half of those are women, and of the remaining half, at least half would be outside your age range. Factor into that that many men who would be looking for a partner of your age may want to father their own children .... You are a very attractive woman! I don't want to sound negative, but there are a few factors that you have absolutely no control over. You sound intelligent, thoughtful .... etc. It's NOT your profile that is the problem! I'm not sure why you aren't making it to the first date. That's an absolute mystery to me. You say you are carrying "a few extra pounds". Your pics look great - is there any chance you have put on more weight than they suggest? Cheers, from a fellow Aussie.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 92 (view)

Scientists' row over G spot nears a climax Posted: 2/29/2008 7:57:28 PM
I think I do. Have found that it can vary a little, though.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 90 (view)

Scientists' row over G spot nears a climax Posted: 2/29/2008 5:55:30 PM
I've managed to find it with every partner I've had (some already knew, of course). I think that the overwhelming majority of women have one (g-spot). There is a clinic in France which specialises in workshops to show women how to find it. Interesting use of speculums and mirrors! P.S. What the **** is a "clitorix"???????

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

Infamous TV show sexual positions/techniques... myth or reality? Posted: 2/29/2008 5:51:55 PM
ha ha. I've been doing this (or variations of) for quite a while now. Just through simple experimentation I found it works. Does it ever! Most times I've heard that only shallow penetration of the vagina is required, but that depends on the individual, in my experience.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 27 (view)

noticing others when you're in a relationship... Posted: 2/29/2008 6:33:52 AM
I had one relationship a while back now ..... well, it was as though no other women existed, lol. I had women friends, but my only sexual or romantic interest was my partner. She's the only one who ever has had that effect on me to date. She was not the sort to worry if I was looking elsewhere, and neither was I concerned (and yet EVERY man within sight of her would get whiplash) that she was looking elsewhere. It's ok to look around, I think, just not touch.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 10 (view)

Loving two men or women?? Posted: 2/29/2008 5:42:30 AM
I think so. Kinda hard to answer, really. I wouldn't imagine that both would be loved in exactly the same way, or the same strength, though. Each brings different things to a relationship. Good question, though.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 84 (view)

WHAT EVER HAPPENED.... TO THE GOOD OLE DAYS? Posted: 2/29/2008 4:50:10 AM
When were they? Pre 1970, for instance? I remember the ladies in my church's kitchen, the men chatting together in the hall, waiting for the supper to be served by their wives. As a young boy, I remember distinctly the women talking in hushed tones about one of those not present who had "the big C". It was a death sentence back then. I remember my own mother, trapped at home with three young boys, feeling useless, overweight and unhappy. She had given up her career as a nurse to raise a family. She was miserable. When she did go back to work she found she was happier, and so were the rest of the family. Back then it was the norm for a woman to just stay at home by the fire and wait for her husband to return and give true meaning to her life. I remember the racial intolerance. My family took in a young aboriginal boy for the summer holidays. I was too young to understand then, but that young boy was deeply troubled. Now, decades later, my country has finally apologised to his people and the healing process has begun. Yeah, the good ole days. I really miss them.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

kissing Posted: 2/27/2008 5:22:50 AM
A kiss on the cheek, perhaps, at the end of the date, if you're just starting, and not sure, otherwise it's the tongue down the throat .....

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 46 (view)

Problems with your man turning you down? Posted: 2/27/2008 5:20:11 AM
Leanne (Msg 36). I tend to agree with what you say. However, what if one of the pair is just plain dog tired? Me? I'd have to be on my deathbed (even then I'd consider), or whacked out on anti-flu medication, etc, to knock back a partner.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

Is There a Difference Between Squirting and Cuming? Posted: 2/27/2008 3:02:24 AM
Great post, Vyper. It tallies with my experience, too.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 141 (view)

1st Date Expecting Dutch without discussing beforehand Posted: 2/26/2008 11:49:14 AM
"... sample the goodies"?????? Ewwwwww ...... I think I'll pass on that. P.S. You'd be guessing wrong. Again. (Groan).

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 47 (view)

Will putting our best pics get the best match over 45? Posted: 2/26/2008 4:25:21 AM
Re the OP: I figure if I'm just posting on forums it doesn't matter. If I'm looking for a partner I'd like to project something realistic, but still want to look good. Same goes for a woman's pics; whilst not being a fan of obvious glamour pics (I was a working photographer at one point), I do think that if someone has just cut and pasted from their driver's license then they're not that serious. Next ..... It's kinda like a woman wearing makeup to go out the door. Hey, I brush my teeth - is that enough?

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 142 (view)

No baggage, is there any such thing? Posted: 2/26/2008 4:22:09 AM
I've got so much baggage I need to charter my own 747.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 119 (view)

1st Date Expecting Dutch without discussing beforehand Posted: 2/26/2008 3:06:30 AM
I meant to say "USE" your mind-reading skills. D'oh!

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 117 (view)

1st Date Expecting Dutch without discussing beforehand Posted: 2/26/2008 1:39:21 AM
What some girls wont say to get a date. Get some self respect woman. This is not the sort of thing I'd expect a 'lady' to say. It's a cheap shot - an inference that another woman is basically cheapening herself just to have a man take her out. That's just plain crass, in my opinion. From reading the young lady's profile and messages it seems to me she's got plenty of class and self-respect. Sheesh ..... .... You teach people how to treat you. This is utterly absurd. Yeah, tell that to the thousands of abused spouses around the country ... .... If you think a man that expects you to pay your own way has any respect for you, you are wrong. I'm assuming you read your mind-reading skills to make yourself a fortune.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 13 (view)

1st Date Expecting Dutch without discussing beforehand Posted: 2/24/2008 1:33:48 AM
Kyn, I don't see it as being cheap and lazy, but heh, we're allowed to have opinions. I get where you are coming from. Your observations on the differences between a coffee meet and a date are similar to my own views. As for workload, there would be a number of men who share equal custody with their ex (I did, for three years until very recently). It was I who had to do the workload in my household, of course. "So what?" I suppose. Correct, but this illustrates just how much what we term the 'family unit' has changed over the last forty years, and our expectations of what our roles should be. I guess chivalry is not a bad thing, though; I still open the car door for my date/partner, and pull the chair out for her to sit on, etc.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 276 (view)

What professions are a turn off? Posted: 2/24/2008 1:00:19 AM
I couldn't be bothered sifting through 11-odd pages, so apologies if these have been posted. 1. Procotologist (Hope they wash their hands) 2. Urologist 3. Artificial Insemination Expert (hope they wash their whole ARM) 4. Ear, Nose and Throat Specialist (dealing with someone's snot and earwax???) 5. Bomb Disposal Expert (unless I'm looking for a one-night stand) 6. Human Waste Collector (for areas without sewerage connections) 7. Abbatoir worker Etc, etc. I think you get the drift

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 7 (view)

1st Date Expecting Dutch without discussing beforehand Posted: 2/24/2008 12:21:33 AM
Well said, Penny-stx. The expectation that the man automatically pays the bill for the first date is one that I've gone along with, quite happily most of the time, but nonetheless it disturbs me that some women actually expect it. The custom is outdated in this age of (fairly equal) pay, in my opinion. It belongs back in the 20th century when women could not vote, stayed at home, etc etc. Seems like some people want the benefits of being in a modern world with some of the benefits of old-world values, and that goes for both sexes!

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 35 (view)

are most men just cowards when it comes to breaking up Posted: 2/23/2008 5:33:50 PM
I agree with some of the OP's message. Damn, that must hurt, so whatever the reason, my heart goes out to you. It certainly does look bad, doesn't it? Is there some small chance that he's been hopitalised, or lost his memory? .... half joking, but the number of times I've even wondered myself, only to find later there was a rational explanation. This comment is more directed to others, not the OP, as seven months does seem like a long time. Seems like you're handling it well. I'm sure, deep down, you realise that most men are not all like that.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 22 (view)

Julia Gillard 2nd Sexiest Woman in Australia ? Posted: 2/23/2008 7:14:26 AM
Sexiest: Not answering that! 2nd most sexy: Tara Moss. Julia is ok, but they must be taking the piss.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

Anniversaries of a loved one's death Posted: 2/23/2008 6:07:09 AM
The day in between sounds great. That's a nice thought, I think. They're lucky to have had you as their daughter. I haven't lost either of my parents, but have felt loss, of sorts. I think remembering their birthday is a fitting thing, too.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 240 (view)

It's not just emails that are rude Posted: 2/23/2008 5:12:42 AM
To the OP: My experience has been that posting a contribution to a thread can bring out the worst in people. I've found lack of manners to be common on these boards. Playing the person instead of contributing properly to debate or discussion is evident on almost thread, unfortunately.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 71 (view)

Why do most guys want a woman who needs them? Posted: 2/22/2008 2:02:49 PM
To answer the OP: I don't think that's the case, at all. Times have changed.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 5 (view)

Are you the 1 Posted: 2/21/2008 2:01:19 AM
Ditto, RedCassandra.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 38 (view)

No, it's not a 'lie' Posted: 2/20/2008 1:11:41 PM
I do think that we CAN keep the fires burning, and keep the passion, along with building something deeper (companionate love, I suppose). I do NOT think I will live a life where my goal is companionate love (for goodness, sake!). ????? Certainly looks like contradictory statements to me. Groan .... read my initial post again, carefully. It could be taken either way (looks like it from what you write, anyway), but my intention was to SUPPORT the idea of romantic love. LOL, you really have got it wrong, haven't you? Whilst we're at it, care to show me where I've condemned 'consummate' love, or where your so-called facts are proved? It is not I who needs to brush up on comprehension skills. You've been extremely selective in quoting me without addressing any questions I ask. Got you're knickers in a twist, it seems, Grannie. The fact remains...that "Companionate love" is NOT "deeper" than the "romantic love" with exists inside the ultimate "Consummate" love. As far as not contributing to the debate, you may well be right on that....heaven forbid that anyone should ever interject reason and logic into a topic where people would much rather go off "half****d" on emotional tangents. Again, what 'facts' are these? Like I said, I'd prefer to leave it to you to discuss the relative merits of certain theories, or try to convince others of their validity. You're pushing the proverbial uphill, but I'm still waiting for that 'evidence'. "Intimacy is easy" LOL. Keep 'em coming.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 12 (view)

No, it's not a 'lie' Posted: 2/20/2008 5:14:33 AM
Grandmabooboo, I was posting an OPINION, and could not be bothered getting involved in an argument with someone about the relative merits of whatever model they subscribe to, of which there are many.. There are various models on love, and I don't take my myself too seriously, nor the theories of others as far as love is concerned. I can't recall any one model being proved as authoritive, in my reading (perhaps you could show me otherwise). The latest theories are just that. However, since you continue to press the issue ...... MY (lol) textbook provides information on various models, and does not subscribe to one being 'better' than the other. Hatfield (1988) describes two types of love: passionate and companionate (Psychology; Westen, Burton, Kowalski, 2006). This was what I was referring to, and it does not sound like you took the time to re-read my text. Instead you continue to play the person. The same text also describes the triangular THEORY of love which mentions 'consummate' love which you mention, and I did not. And then ..... there is Sternberg's (1988) theory with some 25 'stories' but, really, I prefer to leave it to you to argue the relative merits of various theories, lol. EDIT: For what it's worth, I did NOT 'condemn' romantic love as 'immature' (your words). I only suggested (according to a theory that I don't necessarily hold close to my heart as THE truth) that it was less mature, and by that I mean chronologically, not in some theoretical sense. Personally, I adore the notion of romantic love, and seek it, so you are so far off the mark in your assumptions of my desires it's almost funny. I do NOT think I will live a life where my goal is companionate love (for goodness, sake!). Honestly, your assumptions on what I think are amazing ..... To finish, you do suggest, strongly that love is broken into very distinct stages, or types (you number them, lol). That is incredibly blinkered in my opinion. Theories of love, and the 'science' of psychology, has a looooong way to go, and I'm willing to learn, and listen, and read. P.S. "The fact remains.." you can't prove any damned thing, any more than I can, so get off your high horse.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 10 (view)

No, it's not a 'lie' Posted: 2/20/2008 3:49:43 AM
Grandmabooboo, I'm going to take some responsibility for not being clear, perhaps, by either poor writing or grammar. You seem to have misunderstood my message. Perhaps you will give me the benefit of the doubt and re-read my words and come to a different conclusion. Perhaps not, too. Either way, I think your sign off was rather condescending. I have indeed read psych text books, and don't think you were adding to this debate by becoming personal.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 4 (view)

No, it's not a 'lie' Posted: 2/20/2008 2:02:03 AM
My opinion is that to maintain that 'in-love' feeling for any length of time is nigh impossible, BUT ..... I do think that we CAN keep the fires burning, and keep the passion, along with building something deeper (companionate love, I suppose). It takes a lot of hard work and a lot of creativity, I think - a wilingness to keep things fresh and fun. We hear, over and over, that we should expect a loss of passion, and a 'maturing' of love, as though romantic love is immature and somehow cheaper. By definition it must be less mature, for we know the other less well, but I disagree with the pop psychology view that we will lose that gorgeous feeling that goes with falling 'in love'.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

soft whilst downstairs Posted: 2/18/2008 4:37:03 AM
^^^^^^ Ha ha. Same here (though I suspect my current meds don't help!). Mind you, I've been told I'm fairly proficient, and really enjoy it, too.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 137 (view)

How do you spot a player Posted: 2/15/2008 7:05:04 AM
Good question. I've never read any specific definition of the word. I've heard it bandied about, and know that it has negative connotations, but ..... I really think that it's a name that a lot of people throw around when they're feeling just a little hurt or rejected. We ALL play games. By that I mean we all use strategies, even very simple ones, to gain an outcome. God, we're so used to doing it that it's natural. I teach swimming, and yesterday I saw one of my kiddies throw a tantrum. She had her Mum wrapped around her little finger - we learn very early in life. A raised eyebrow here, a sigh there ... it's open to interpretation what is 'gameplaying' and what is innocent. Personally, I will avoid using the term. Glass houses and all that. Sorry, to answer your question: I'd just say 'dishonest'. (Gawd, even then I ask myself if I've always been squeaky clean). Not wanting to sound too opinionated. Hope this suffices.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 73 (view)

Question for the photography fanatics out there.. Are there ways to identify a fake pic?? Posted: 2/15/2008 4:53:45 AM
Nope. The thumbnail versions that we can post on this site are far too small to make that judgement, for starters.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 135 (view)

How do you spot a player Posted: 2/15/2008 3:58:05 AM
One of the most stupid labels invented. Dumb, dumb, dumb.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 400 (view)

I'm wondering .... Posted: 2/15/2008 3:50:46 AM
Who the Hell is going to admit they are cheating, or capable of it? Not the sort of thing you may want to admit to (unless you're going to set up an alias profile) if you want to meet someone from this site. "Oh yeah, I'm a serial cheater ...." (Yes, I realise the OP's question was phrased differently). :-)

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 29 (view)

Pick the socially awkward one Posted: 2/14/2008 5:18:27 AM
Basically, I believe the article is a load of shyte. I'm self-aware, according to various psych friends, counsellors, etc, etc. I know I monitor my behaviour, and DO modify it to suit the occasion. So, this makes me a situational chameleon, but at the end of the day I'm still just a colourful lizard. My behaviour with a significant other will basically be consistent with her. The person who is known to be 'socially awkward' and inept could be seen as insensitive, or if sensitive, then just plain selfish. "I call it like it is, no bullshit" is a phrase that makes me run a mile, usually; not because I'm afraid of what they may say. It's almost as if they're overly proud of that stance. I say to them "Be proud of your integrity, but is it necessary to advertise it so boldly?"

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 276 (view)

Some are, some aren't .. Posted: 2/12/2008 4:59:54 AM
I joined RSVP in Australia, three years ago. I've had a fair number of genuine enquiries in that time, and that is a site where one pays for the privilege. Others, like Adult Friend Finder, for instance, well ..... I've been convinced it's a scam. A bait email will arrive, a bit of to-and-fro, then nothing. As for POF, my experience is that it's been pretty genuine, with some good people here, so hang in there!

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 127 (view)

have you ever tasted breastmilk? Posted: 2/12/2008 3:33:54 AM
Yeah. I was riding a train into town, and the woman next to me was feeding. I was feeling kinda hungry, so elbowed the young'n outa the way and helped myself.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 76 (view)

What's the OPPOSITE of a guy afraid of commitment? Posted: 2/11/2008 11:56:55 PM
california bob: That would be a lesbian looking for commitment, wouldn't it?

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 34 (view)

Yours, His, Her's Trademark or Signature Lovemaking Move? Posted: 2/10/2008 5:58:17 AM
Mine is the one where I point a finger to the rolling disco ball on the ceiling and throw my jacket on the bedpost

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 412 (view)

Why is it so hard to find a relationship when one is middle aged? Posted: 2/10/2008 5:38:42 AM
To the OP: Middle-aged, I suppose, is around 40, give or take 5 years, going on average life expectancy. Why do we find it harder? Most of our peers are already married, or dead, for starters. Then, on top of that, we're probably pickier and more set in our ways, lol.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 52 (view)

Do you find yourself becoming apathetic about finding love? Posted: 2/10/2008 5:26:46 AM
Too numerous to mention here! ...... err, I was not being entirely serious.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 107 (view)

All Men are Dogs!!!! Posted: 2/10/2008 5:15:22 AM
Greyhounds chase, yes. However, I think they're as dumb as cat shit ..... Ooops ........

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 119 (view)

Disappearing Act - How Did You Feel? Posted: 2/10/2008 4:41:40 AM
OP: I've been on the end of this sort of behaviour before, and at first it troubled me. That was a long time ago. I ended up not taking it as a 'knockback' as such. There are a million reasons why someone may not call you back. Perhaps giving them the benefit of the doubt is the way to go.

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 222 (view)

If something will turn you off the most on a first date what would it be? Posted: 2/10/2008 4:37:53 AM
Not sure if you're being sarcastic or not, lol. I was responding to the OP's question. Believe it or not, I'm chilled out :-)

enfpman

Joined: 9/24/2007

Msg: 105 (view)

All Men are Dogs!!!! Posted: 2/10/2008 4:35:51 AM
Hmmm. I guess I'd consider myself a greyhound. Made for speed, thin-ish, doe-eyed, lazy by nature ......

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