*Holds breath* chat & forums.

Posted In Forum:

Home

MyForums

Show ALL Forums

Author

Thread: *Holds breath*

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 4 (view)

Holds breath Posted: 12/1/2008 9:25:23 PM
I personally think it's perfect. Sometimes you don't need formula's. Your profile shows intelligence, wit, a light and serious side, and a genuine expression of what you're looking for. You also have actually made the effort to answer the perfect date question with a genuine response of something you enjoy doing, instead of just the inane responses so many put up. I wouldn't change a thing myself.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 15 (view)

why add a guy as a favorite.... Posted: 11/6/2007 10:07:43 PM
When I add a person to my favorites it means I think they're profile is really good and should be noticed for it's attempt to be informative and entertaining. Doesn't mean I think the person would be interested in me or I in them. However, if a guy messaged me after (which has never happened) I would let them know why and correspond if they were interested. Usually I don't match their criteria, which is why I haven't messaged them myself, but I wanted to give their profile some

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 7 (view)

Love at First Read? Posted: 11/3/2007 10:14:17 PM
Man but I would love this to happen to me. Of course, too many of the profiles I read are so short I couldn't fall 'in love' even if I were Sleeping Beauty desperately tired of sleeping.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 12 (view)

just by looking at someone-she /he is not my type Posted: 11/3/2007 10:11:20 PM
I have looked at a few pictures and known instantly they were not my type. Had nothing to do with clothing or anything appearance. In each of these instances, not only were the guys not smiling in any of their pics, but they looked nearly menacing. There was nothing playful or fun in any expression on any picture. Someone like that is not going to be a good fit for me.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 29 (view)

The one... Posted: 11/3/2007 9:39:10 PM
i believe in soulmates, but not in the opposite sex sense...my sould mate is my best friend sarah. ever since we met almost 10 years ago, we have ALWAYS been on the same page with our personal lives. i go thru something, then a couple of months later she goes thru something similar. and vice versa. we have had our fair share of arguements, but we have always been honest with eachother - and most importantly, we have called eachother out on things we aren't sitting well with. Thank you for further demonstrating the point. I think that most people on here, who have given an affirmative answer, have said the same thing. And it further demonstrates that people don't have deluded ideas about soul mates, they have logical ones. Similar to the house analogy; of course there isn't only one person you can ever be happy with. There's also not one outfit that will ever be a good fit. But we all have one item in our closet that is perfect for us. It suits us well, diminishes our flaws, and speaks volumes about our style and personality. It also makes us feel good about ourselves when we wear it. I think what is being overlooked is that the 'one' just means that some of us will meet a SO in our life who is the perfect match for us in every way. Are there good matches that aren't perfect, absolutely. But to dismiss that you can find someone who you love, and who loves you, like that is just as dangerous as waiting around for the perfect Mr./Ms. Right. If you dismiss the possibility, you may assume an immediate and intrinsic connection is nothing but hormones, and pass up a potentially idyllic relationship.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

The one... Posted: 10/31/2007 6:46:04 PM
Unfortunately, I have to disagree with you on this one Oriole, but I always knew you were more pragmatic while I am more romantic. I do believe it's accurate that there are different people in this world you can have a lasting and loving relationship with. For me, the concept of a soul mate does not dismiss this possibility. It's more like the idea of the perfect job. Are there other jobs you can be perfectly happy with, even for the rest of your life? Of course there are. But there are still jobs that are perfect and fulfill you in a way that you didn't know was possible. Something just clicks, and it's the perfect balance of everything for your mind, body and soul. In the same vein, I believe there are single individuals in this world who are the perfect partner for us. People with whom all the right things are the same, and all the right things about them are different. I do believe that there is a perfect someone for everyone, but it's logistically unlikely that all of us will find that someone. Some just get lucky. However, while I won't wait around hoping for my soul mate to pop into my life, I will continue to hold that idea in the back of my heart, at least until there is someone else significant using that space.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 43 (view)

Reading minds Posted: 10/29/2007 10:18:52 PM
While we're giving the guys hints, here's another one. I know a lot of guys on here complain about the "Fine." and "Nothing." stuff. Well, I can enlighten you on what most women mean (at least the ones in my acquaintance) , and it's not what you think. I've seen guys who think this translates to, "I'm upset by I want you to know why without my telling you." Wrong answer. True translation, "I'm upset, but I don't want to unload on you because it's not your problem, and you shouldn't have to deal with my anger/hurt over something you had nothing to do with." Now, here's the real question. If you were feeling that way, how would you like your partner to react? Warning: This only applies if it is clear that the "Nothing." is not something you did. In those cases, you have two possibilities. One, you do have one of those chicks guys complain about who expect to have their minds read. Two, translation is roughly, "I'm pissed at you, but nagging at you isn't going to fix anything, so let me calm the hell down or I might come at you with a heavy object."

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 35 (view)

Any tips on what women prefer to hear when they are contacted? Posted: 10/29/2007 10:01:51 PM
Therefore I think the pictures are generally more important to people here than what you put on your profile although there are some exceptions. I guess I'm an exception. If the message and profile are less than three sentences (unless they are really long sentences), I generally don't respond. I don't care if you look like Kevin Sorbo. If you can't make an effort to tell me something about who you are, and why you would like to talk to me, there's no point in starting a convo.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

Do You Like To Be Challenged? Posted: 10/21/2007 10:10:40 PM
OP, I'd like to know more specifically something you've sent out, if you wouldn't mind posting. There may be a subtlety issue in play here. For instance, on my profile it says I like Shakespeare, but mostly just the comedies. If you messaged me with questions about why the dramas don't interest me, even including why you prefer them, I would find that thought provoking and definitely worthy of a conversation starter. If, however, you messaged me that I was someone lacking in taste for this preference and why you think so, I'd probably reply back that were a moron and then block you.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 29 (view)

so what is the one thing a woman wants most from a man ? Posted: 10/21/2007 10:02:37 PM
I think my favorite so far is "best friend" ......... no one said a partner, hmmm....... Jeez, give a girl a chance to finish a movie. Partner, good grief yes. I don't want someone to take care of me, I just want someone to help share the burden. Life is complex, messy and time consuming. What I would love to have, more than anything, is someone to share the load. If I found a man who understood that, it would all be good. Oh, but he still better have a sense of humor or life is going to get pretty boring.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 15 (view)

Why Bother Waiting for Sex? Posted: 10/21/2007 1:05:42 AM
I've said it before. If I had a time machine, I'd go back and tell my 16 year old self to stop worrying about how accepted you are. Funny you should say that. This conversation had me thinking about my own choices at that time. When I was 16, I got on the pill and also got a nice bag full of condoms. I did not have a boyfriend at the time, and had no particular person in mind to sleep with. It wasn't about that. I decided I was ready to have sex, and I wanted to be prepared. It was a good thing when I met a guy a few weeks later that I ended up sleeping with. At which point, my best friend 'dumped me' because I slept with someone I wasn't married to. And do you know how I felt about that? Pissed. I'm happy to say my convictions and knowledge of my self worth was fairly decent at that age. I don't think you have to be dishonest though, to be happy. In fact, I think that would eat at your happiness more than anything. You just have to do the best you can to deal with societies standards, and know when to say the hell with them. I'm not hurting anyone, so what they think doesn't matter.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 104 (view)

Ladies, can a man cheat on you and still be in love with you? Posted: 10/21/2007 12:49:18 AM
To me being in love with someone involves respect and trust and honesty. When a person cheats, they show that they don't respect you and that you can't trust them. It also shows they can't be honest. Once you lose that, I don't see how there can be love. You can still feel attracted, but I just don't see how you can tell someone that you'll be faithful, then break that when you respect the person you said you'd be faithful too. Plus it's been my experience that most cheaters don't go out, cheat then as soon as possible, call their partner up and confess. They usually lie about it. No trust= no love. By that same token, you would assume that anyone who's ever lied to you can't love you, which is also logistically unlikely. People lie all the time. Parents lie, friends lie, siblings lie. My sister has lied to me before, it doesn't mean I think she doesn't love me. Love and honesty are not tied to one another. By that same token, it would mean you would automatically stop loving anyone you couldn't trust. History says, that doesn't happen. Love doesn't turn off and on with a switch. If a man and a woman have been married for 20 years, and then one of them does something stupid, they don't suddenly not love each other.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 28 (view)

How much time do you spend thinking about sex? Posted: 10/21/2007 12:34:22 AM
You know, I'm 31 and I could care less if I ever get laid again. Unless it's Lyle the Sexy Mechanic, of course. Other than that, I've discovered that if you surround yourself with ugly men and work a lot of hours, all those hormones pretty much wither away. Or something. You know I respect the hell out of you Oriole, but while the hormones are driving me a little batty, I do hope I never get to the point you are. And I'm a year older than you. I'm too much in awe of sex and all its mysteries to ever want to ditch it completely.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 10 (view)

Why Bother Waiting for Sex? Posted: 10/21/2007 12:31:03 AM
I'll decide on a person by person basis and if it feels right I'll do it but I wont be stressing about it, drawing up a graph or timeline or blowing it off as just something you do either. I think (if I'm reading you right) that you think you're countering our points. But in fact, I think you're agreeing with them. I don't do casual affairs much myself, and we're not talking about sleeping with just anyone you meet. But not placing rules and guidelines on when you get intimate with someone, and simply going with you're own feelings and desires, is exactly what we're talking about. But there are too many women who don't follow that school of thought. Who do have number of date rules, and other ridiculous strictures that are predominantly based on societies ideas of what is ok, when they should just be following their own gut.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

Why Bother Waiting for Sex? Posted: 10/21/2007 12:26:14 AM
I understand where you're coming from with that story wpg_chick_84, but consider this. Let's presume, for the sake of argument, that this guy was playing you. What if we lived in a country where sex wasn't such a big deal, a place where men and women could get it fairly easily, without a lot of games. Would there really be a reason for the bump and run guys to exist? Why would they bother? If they didn't have to lie and cajole to get a woman into bed, would they still do it? I'm not saying I have the answer to this question, but I think it's an interesting one to ponder. Does the very existence of this countries puritanical view of sex create the perfect environment for dishonest men and women to lie to get laid?

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 4 (view)

Why Bother Waiting for Sex? Posted: 10/21/2007 12:01:48 AM
Right, because really, however a girl's intentions might be to making sure that she is held higher than a sex object, it's like the longer she waits to share herself, it almost makes everything you've done and said before that as a man look like it was all just leading up to that act, and afterward there's all this pressure to show her you still like and want her for more than her body all over again. Absolutely true. If you make a man jump through hoops to get your panties off, guess what, that makes you the prize in a contest. How are men supposed to see it any other way? Something else that occurred to me. Sex with a new person is stressful enough. There's always performance and preference issues. Is this person into more aggressive sex than you are, and vice versa? How do they like to be touched? Will they touch you they way you like? There's enough going on there without making it a long drawn out process too. Everyone, of course, has different points when they're comfortable getting intimate. But I do worry that too many women don't even go for it when they are ready, because of how they think they'll be viewed based on some arbitrary time line. And going beyond your own comfort point, can actually cause the event to be more stressful than it already was going to be. Coincidentally, this is mimicked by a problem some women have in the bedroom. Build up is nice, but sometimes, if you keep getting close without crossing the finish line, you won't be able to get there at all.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 102 (view)

Ladies, can a man cheat on you and still be in love with you? Posted: 10/20/2007 11:54:13 PM
Wow, I have to say this thread is shocking. How can so many people believe that someone in love never cheats? Logistically that doesn't even make sense. If that were true, that would mean that roughly one third of all married people don't love their spouse, and that's just the number of people who have admitted in a poll that they've cheated. Coincidentally, that's also the number of people who believe infidelity should be a crime. A lot of people are being highly unrealistic. Being in love has nothing to do with the ability to cheat. It just means you're doing a greater disservice to your partner by doing it. I've never cheated on anyone, but I would never assume a man who cheated on me didn't love me. I would just be highly reluctant to trust him again. I made a promise to myself a long time ago that I would never make a rule about cheating in regards to my relationships. I won't say that I would never forgive a man, and I won't say that I would. I would try to take in all the factors before making a decision like that. Because men, just like women, are human. And all humans make stupid mistakes sometimes. Sometimes they've forgivable. Sometimes they're not.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

Why Bother Waiting for Sex? Posted: 10/20/2007 11:42:26 PM
I agree 2000%. And I've said so on here enough times. The US is a big place where this is an issue. I believe it all stems from one fateful story we tell our children...when two people love each other very much, they will make love and that's where babies come from. It seems like a good idea, at the time, but it causes so many problems down the road. Sex is treated far too seriously in public, and not seriously enough in private. We love to judge people by who they sleep with and when in public discussion, but we treat it with kid gloves in relationships. It's BS. Sex should be a fun way of getting to know someone, not the end of the courtship process, as it's so often treated. And I still contend that the way women are taught about sex in their childhood, in that they should guard it away and not actually just have sex because they want to, is the main reason why there is so much sexual dysfunction among women today. And I know some won't agree that there is, but I've had enough conversations with female friends and family to know it's true.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 20 (view)

when she gets close she stops me Posted: 10/20/2007 11:27:10 PM
^^^ The impression I got was that she wasn't just talking about this thread. I have seen a lot of people on here get razzed over dating while separated, or talking about dating a separated person. They don't get near the garbage that out right cheaters get, but there's a lot of negativity thrown at them.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 17 (view)

Recovering addict meets a good girl. Posted: 10/20/2007 11:18:57 PM
If this question were something more like "should i tell future girlfriends that I've murdered somebody", I could see the reasoning of having to tell the girl. But when it comes to something as personal as an addiction, you should only do it if you want to, not because you have to, or should. Its your choice, its your addiction, and its your recovery. And that analogy is why I am guessing you've never been in a relationship with a current or recovering addict. Being with one can cause you a great deal of pain. There's a reason there's a support group for addicts, and then another for people who love them. If you have ever had a serious addiction, relapse is always a possibility. And if it happens, a SO needs to be sure they can handle it before they get into a relationship. You'll also notice no one is condemning the OP for his past. No one is judging him. And no one has suggested this is all his own fault. Of course addiction is a physical disease as much as a mental one. That's fairly documented by now, though they still can't isolate why. There's enough anecdotal evidence to back it up. Being with an addict is hard, even a recovering one. You have to be prepared not only for a possible relapse, but also the near relapse, which can be stressful since they will need your support to make it through. We're not saying he has to wear a scarlet A on his chest. Just that he has to be upfront if he wants an honest relationship that can last. There are also certain medical conditions that I think should be up fronts. I myself will share early on that I'm diabetic. Partly because it's responsible to share this will people you will be around a lot. For instance, there are conditions (like HHNS) where I could be in trouble if no one knew why I was suddenly weak and hallucinating. Also because it can be a complete pain in the ass when eating out, so I don't want the guy to think I'm being miss picky when I tell him I can't go to a suggested place because they have absolutely nothing I can eat on their menu.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 18 (view)

when she gets close she stops me Posted: 10/20/2007 10:53:29 PM
I would like to understand why a seperated person should not date? My husband moved out over a year ago and has contested the divorce on financial reasons (he wants money) for the past 16 months - filed before he moved out - and there is no end in site of the legal battle .. should I remain celebate and alone while he moves on with his life and drags me through the mud? I could put divorced but it would be a lie .. and the option isnt there for in progress It seems to be a popular opinion on here. I think it stems from some people jumping into a new relationship before the autopsy is done on the old one. I think though, that every single situation is unique. There are people who should wait until the dust settles, but for emotional reasons and to prevent additional complications. However, that doesn't apply to everyone. If you've both moved on and the only quibbling left is between the lawyers, I don't see any reason that should keep you off the market.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 26 (view)

How much time do you spend thinking about sex? Posted: 10/20/2007 10:48:15 PM
Now that i am in my forties ..... ALLL DAYYY LONGGGGG. And with the right guy I probably could do it ALL DAAAYYY LOOONNGGG. Oh please tell me it doesn't get worse in the 40s. I don't know if I can handle that. It's already annoying as crap, especially when it's been a very along time since I got any. I've come to the conclusion that SexEd was BS. They didn't teach you jack. I found so many things when I had my son, that no one EVER told me about pregnancy. I never learned one useful thing about sex either, because we already knew all about safe sex from the After School Specials. And then I find out that your libido goes into overdrive when you hit 30ish, and no one warned me about that either. I only got that from jokes about cougars on TV, so I figured it was only marginally true. I want to go back to school and kick my health teacher in the nuts, I swear.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 17 (view)

Is showing breasts indecent? Posted: 10/20/2007 10:41:56 PM
I read in a thread here last month, that there actually places in the US, where you can get arrested for breast-feeding in public. Un-f*cking- believeable!! Not true. It is not illegal in any state in the US. It is, however, not protected by many states, so private businesses can often ask you to stop or leave. This pisses me off to no end. I am not in the habit of going topless (not since I was 19 anyway, and then I was in a moving car most of the time), but I thoroughly support the movement to make it legal. As long as men are allowed, so should women be, simple as that. And while there are some guys who should keep their shirts on, let's not discourage the others from taking them off. How would they know which team is which in basketball?

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 57 (view)

How Stupid Do You Think We Are? Posted: 10/20/2007 10:34:15 PM
This is what happens when you ask a question-it becomes an "attack" - if this is "communication" between the sexes, no wonder why so many women are alone! Ahem...don't you mean why so many people are alone? And the funny thing, besides the OPs sense of humor, is that there probably are more women 30-35 on here than any other age group. Not just because they've moved on from their first husband, but because the average age in this country is 30-40. And the second largest segment of the population is in that range. People think that Generation X was small compared to the baby boomers, but census number say that dip in birth rates was marginal, at best.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 22 (view)

No girl ever wakes up and hopes, I hope nobody comes and sweeps me off my feet today. Posted: 10/20/2007 10:07:33 PM
Maybe I am a romantic, but I still hope for that knight in shining armour. With you there. Something that too many people ignore is that the knight doesn't have to be some uber hottie on a white horse. It's not about that. It's not that the fairy tales aren't real, it's that there are fiction, and like most fiction, it's about taking reality and making it more interesting. Many women in love report being swept off their feet by the man in their life. And most of them weren't on horseback. It's about instant connection (which is not the same thing as instant attraction) and that does happen to people. And it often lasts, because you feel like you've known each other forever in the first conversation, so it's already a long term relationship. So no, I'm not waiting for a prince charming, but I am waiting for MY prince charming. And if I have any luck at all, the glint will be coming from his wit more than his white teeth.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 16 (view)

when she gets close she stops me Posted: 10/20/2007 9:58:51 PM
I would suggest some videos, and I don't mean porn. There are several instructional DVD's out about female orgasms. For any of the reasons already listed, she could be acting this way. But they all stem from the same place, she doesn't feel comfortable with her own body's reactions. Something like Heinman's Becoming Orgasmic, or Kim Cattral's Art of the Female Orgasm are good ideas. I'd also highly recommend Cattral's Sexual Intelligence, for general information. It's a great movie.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 22 (view)

How many is too many? Posted: 10/20/2007 9:30:39 PM
Sex is just a physical conversation. You limit the number of conversations you'll have in your lifetime OP? I can count on my fingers, but that's a matter of availability not judgments on sex. Sex is a beautiful form of expression, both committed and casual, and needs to stop being treated as a reflection on morality.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 34 (view)

Sarcasm.... Posted: 10/20/2007 9:09:13 PM
Myself and my kids are great practitioners of the art, though we never aim it at each other, or those who may be hurt by it. And those who do use it have to be careful to teach their kids to use it wisely. My son was a whiz at sarcasm by the age of 6. I stress to him constantly to watch how he applies it.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 27 (view)

Games at Work Posted: 10/20/2007 9:03:37 PM
So the overall consensus is...maybe. Oh well, I guess I'll just hope he gets over his pique fairly quickly. I'm not likely to return the behavior, just in case. If he was flirting, I don't want to give him a reason to continue. I'm actually one of the office goofs, so I doubt he'll think I'm a noodge or anything, but I'm quite certain dating him would be a bad move. The age difference alone is daunting.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 12 (view)

Games at Work Posted: 10/20/2007 12:23:33 AM
If you want to get rid of this wanna be ninja, you'll either have to challenge him to a contest (prefferably to the death), or sleep with him. Ninja always cap off a mission with some T&A, so you'll actually trick him into thinking he's won that way. I can't help but wonder if you're suggesting the sex course of action in the hopes that someone else will apply this advice to yourself. I think I'll pass on that in my case.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 31 (view)

Sarcasm.... Posted: 10/20/2007 12:20:44 AM
I love this quote from LIS... SMITH: Sarcasm is the recourse of a weak mind. WEST: I'm hiding the pain. Really. I've always found that people who think that way, don't get it, plain and simple. Can sarcasm be over used, to the point where you are no longer trying to be funny but just being an A$$? Of course it can. Same thing goes for any kind of humor. I am a smart-a$$, pure and simple. And I adore sarcasm. I think that most people who enjoy it, give as good as they get. If they aren't so prone to use sarcasm, they don't often appreciate it. Incidentally cdflash, I also write parody and satire, so I know it's not as easy as you'd like to think. Good sarcasm requires careful wording and impeccable delivery, must like satire. And there are people who do it well, and people who don't know how to apply it, just like parody (see Scary Movie's 1&2 for prime examples of bad).

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

Games at Work Posted: 10/20/2007 12:01:59 AM
Just be yourself. Not trying to be obnoxious, but...huh?

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

Recovering addict meets a good girl. Posted: 10/19/2007 11:46:12 PM
Absolutely not. I'm not saying it has to be in the first exchange, but it should come fairly early on. This is particularly true if you're recovery was anytime recently. She might be hesitant, and some women might even run, but it's better than hiding it. A person should know something that significant when they get into a relationship. If they run, then they were going to run later anyway, and you're better off finding out off the bat. As a survivor of a relationship with an active abuser, I would be skittish myself. But I'd like to think I would give him the benefit of the doubt. However, if he kept it from me until later, I would be less inclined to trust his 'recovery' as legitimate.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 7 (view)

Games at Work Posted: 10/19/2007 11:36:01 PM
I guess I should clarify. I was more trying to get a feel for the likelihood his latest attitude stems from rejection than asking if I should consider dating him. I doubt I would do that either way. He's probably not more than 25, and former military. I'm fairly certain our commonalities would be zero to none. I also forgot to mention that, at our team meeting that morning (after he took the tags), I was promoted to one of the leads in our office. I don't think that would preclude our dating. I'm not so much his supervisor as his superior, but by the time he stated his 'demands' (after getting all the new work of promotion without a pay raise), I wasn't in the most playful of moods. I don't think I was harsh with him though, so that's why I wondered if he was expecting me to just concede the point to indicate I was receptive.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

Games at Work Posted: 10/19/2007 10:49:49 PM
Ok, my first post initiation, but I really wanted some male perspectives on this. A couple of days ago, one of my coworkers jokingly suggested he could easily sneak up on my at my desk. He claimed that, due to this military training, he was very stealthy (his word) and ninja like. I responded that I was a lot more observant than he thought. The day before yesterday I came into work to find my name tags were gone from my cubicle. In their place was a piece of paper saying they were being held for ransom by ninjas and I would receive their list of demands shortly. I admit, it was a funny move. I also didn't throw a fit about it. I waited patiently for the kidnappers demands. A few hours later, he stops by my desk, and I said I was still waiting for the list. His response was that all he wanted was an acknowledgment of his stealth, since he actually took them the night before. Now, I know I'm a bit stubborn at times, but I didn't give in. The thing is, my name tags hang on the outside of my cubicle wall, which stands about 3 1/2 feet high. People stand there to talk to me about 100 times a day, and walk by my cubicle about 1000 times a day. They could rip my name tags off while I'm looking right at them and I'd have no way of knowing. And it's not as if I look every time I go to my desk to make sure my name tags are still in place. I didn't feel he had earned the stealthy title, and I said as much (I also don't let guys beat me at ski ball). He begrudgingly returned the name tags a little later, and he's been acting a little brusk since. So my question is, was he flirting, and is therefore acting pissy because I didn't just name him Mr. Ninja and give a girlie giggle? In retrospect, the whole thing does smack of pulling pigtails on the playground. Or does he just not like that I expect more proof before declaring him Stealth Man?

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 52 (view)

How many of you have initiated contact?? Posted: 10/19/2007 10:31:11 PM
I've yet to initiate contact myself. Mostly because I keep running into road blocks. I'll read a profile, and he'll seem funny and interesting, and we'll have similar interests but then I'll look at what he's 'looking for' and I don't fit. Or he'll have something on his profile that makes me balk, like Christian. I don't immediately shy from those, but if they have an actual denomination listed, I am very leary. I prefer not to repeat past mistakes.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 31 (view)

Body Type : Prefer not to say. Posted: 10/19/2007 10:19:54 PM
In order to handle the work load I'm expecting, please arrive in the tiniest swimwear/lingerie you are able to obtain. Please, no gifts are necessary, I love my work. I'm suddenly having a flash of that commercial for Norbit with the bikini scene.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 34 (view)

Another chance to be positive about men! Posted: 10/19/2007 10:11:50 PM
I refrained earlier, but since it looks like the thread in question has been deleted (not surprisingly), I'll say what I was going to before. I love men, all different kinds. The main reason being that I find the way they react to love fascinating. I've known many a guy who was all about being cool or tough, so as not to appear wimpy or vulnerable, but when they really discover love...wow. And I'm not just talking about romantic love. When they first see their child, the look on the face of many men is devastatingly beautiful. I've also seen a man turn into a 6 year old boy when faced with a mothers love, and it's breathtaking to behold. If a guy wants to be 'strong' that's fine, but when the sensitivity sneaks in, that's when it gets good. And there is nothing more attractive than a fool for love, even if it's something as simple as letting your 3-year old niece play salon with your hair.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

How much time do you spend thinking about sex? Posted: 10/19/2007 9:37:09 PM
Well I seem to be a minority. I have discovered that that whole sexual peak in the early 30's is dead on. I think about it way too much, though probably not as much as an 18 year old boy. But thanks to hormones, it's rarely far from my mind. It doesn't matter if I'm seeing someone or not. I do however subscribe to the Simply Irresistible theory, one good sexual thought takes at least 20 minutes.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 2 (view)

Women who like to dance. Men who don't (or can't). Posted: 10/19/2007 9:21:41 PM
I miss the 80's, when everyone danced, even if they sucked at it. The thing is, I don't care if a guy can dance, I just care that he will. If he can't cut loose on the dance floor a little, he's likely too uptight for me.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 24 (view)

What is really going trough her head? Posted: 10/18/2007 8:35:13 PM
Wow, on this one I'm going to have to stray far away from the consensus on the issue that's really going on here. I think this woman has her own boundary issues that she refuses to deal with, and you're being hurt by it. If a man that I didn't want a relationship or physical intimacy with touched me in the way your describing. I would tell him to stop, right there and then. Doesn't want to hurt your feelings, that's BS. She's sending mixed signals. She won't deal with you head on, instead she allows you to show your feelings physically, then complains about it after the fact. The first time the issue came up, she can be excused, that she didn't feel she knew you well enough to know you'd take the rejection. I have been in that situation, it can be scary even with a man you know well. You don't want to end up in any kind of physical confrontation. But if she continued to see you IRL, continued the friendship, and let you continue touching without saying no, she's the one in the wrong, IMO.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

Another chance to be positive about men! Posted: 10/18/2007 8:26:28 PM
I'm afraid dutchpirate has a valid point. I blame genetic predisposition. I was going to post something more specific to your question, but I'm afraid I might be viewed as cheating regarding a question I asked on another thread, so I'll wait a little while.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 13 (view)

Why do women do this? Posted: 10/18/2007 8:13:29 PM
If they don't wont the offers don't dress like a slut in my opinion. I find this interesting, I really do. So when a man runs around in nothing but shorts, with his six-pack showing, do I get to call him a slut too? How about the tight muscle T's that show all their own 'curves'? Did you know there's a movement out there that women should be allowed to walk around topless? The human body is a beautiful thing, and however a woman, or a man, chooses to display it is not something you have any business judging. However, I will concede that I'm getting tired of the girls with tiny skirts and no panties. That's just asking the world to be your gynecologist.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 10 (view)

HI again... Posted: 10/17/2007 10:05:15 PM
But with a 30 day point back guarantee...methinks we might be headed for bankruptcy We could do it like they sell CD's and DVD's, if you've unwrapped the package, you can only exchange, not return. And imagine the advertisers who would want in on this, the first company to get Trojan and Secret to come together.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

Why the Lei? Posted: 10/17/2007 9:58:56 PM
They are also often given out at bars during celebrations like our own, "Jamaica My Weekend". You'll notice a great deal of Mardi Gras beads too, which are also common hand outs at bars, particularly in the midwest.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

HI again... Posted: 10/17/2007 9:51:39 PM
^^^^ We could steal Ebay's new slogan, "It’s better when you win it."

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 9 (view)

Long or short profile -- 2 part question. Posted: 10/17/2007 9:29:48 PM
^^^^^^ Now that I can breath, don't do that! I'll have these sentences in my head for days now, with your alteration.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 44 (view)

A question about the way women think about men. Posted: 10/17/2007 9:26:22 PM
Women on the other hand need a certain amount of social interaction first. You've obviously never heard of the Diet Coke break. You're theory may be true of some women, but it's as inconsistent as assuming all women size men up on more than a quick glance, which is not true. There are shallow men, and shallow women. There are men who have too many rules and guidelines about who they'll date, and there are women who are the same. Most of us, fall somewhere in between. I do not test men I find dateworthy, under any circumstances. Now, I will occasionally play movie quotes with them, but there is no prize or penalty for not getting the answers right.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 3 (view)

HI again... Posted: 10/17/2007 9:16:36 PM
I don't dig when guys give me real roses, cyber roses would be just silly. I think we should just give them all to one person. Maybe the next really sweet guy who is getting zero dates (but is NOT advertising himself outside the contest thread or asking for profile help) gets a gazillion roses. It might perk up his odds.

CleverTitania

Joined: 9/29/2007

Msg: 15 (view)

What is Cute and Sweet? Posted: 10/17/2007 9:00:16 PM
That sounds like the dreaded friend zone to me. I think that was the case, once upon a time, but it's not anymore. There are many different words women use to describe guys in terms of attractiveness. Cute generally means reasonably good looking, a natural and innocent charm, and often has a fairly sunny disposition. For instance, Jared Padelicki is, IMO, cute. Where as, Jensen Ackles is hot. It doesn't mean Jared lacks hotness, it just means his is more disarming. If you have no idea who I'm talking about, look up the show Supernatural. Chances are you've seen these two boys in other things to see what I mean. Sweet fits what Oriole said for me. I'm most likely to call a guy sweet if I feel he's making a concerted effort to make me smile.

Show ALL Forums