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 Author Thread: One week after a meeting, he wants to come to my house
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 82 (view)
 
One week after a meeting, he wants to come to my house
Posted: 9/25/2008 3:16:40 AM
not a chance you should let him visit you at home, nor should you go to his. How well can you possibly know him or about him after a week. well I guess you do know he is somewhat pushy (pressuring you) and not very understanding (continues to pressure after you explained your REASONABLE concerns)

If you can't get to know each other in public places why would you want to get to know him in the privacy of a home. Listen to that little voice in your head....it's your mother telling you the right answer...they never leave us you know....you kow what the right answer is. Stick to your principals and don't ever let anyone pressure you into anything you are not comfortable with. If he can't deal with it...cast the line back in the water and catch a different fish.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 40 (view)
 
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/25/2008 2:28:01 AM
I raised my three children and this topic came up...my ex had to continue to pay as long as child was a fulltime student or to the age of 23.

cheapest route for you to take is your local child support recovery office. You can complete the required ppwk with their office and they pursue the matter.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 87 (view)
 
Can I recover a can we slow things down? situation?
Posted: 9/25/2008 2:13:10 AM
Sounds to me as though you both moved sort of quick. Slow and easy is always best. get to know the person first, become friends make sure you are truly gonna like this person. A few weeks, months....how well do you really know someone in this amount of time? When people first meet they always put their best foot forward...give it time for the other foot to catch up so you know who you are about to get involved with.

Your post (msg12) is a smart move. Just be out there so she knows you're there and offer her friendship first...then be a friend. Best lovers in the world will also be your best FRIEND.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 146 (view)
 
Saw My Wedding ring On My X Husbands New Girlfriend!
Posted: 9/12/2007 6:45:41 PM
WOW...okay I can't say anything about this nutless wonder of an ex-husband you have that hasn't already been said.

But after reading most (not all) of these post I am surprised at how many women said "say nothing". This confuses me, you would sit back and let this poor women possibly make the biggest mistake in her life, and say nothing? Does she not have the right to know what a dirt ball he can be? Maybe she should waste the next 3 or 4 years (hopefully no more than that) of her life and find out for herself like many of us had to. I wish someone could have given me some heads up, I might have gave things a better look before I jumped into the marriage. Tuff one I admit....don't have the answer but I would be inclined to let her know...If she doesn't listen she only has herself to blame when things don't work out with this idiot.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 114 (view)
 
Are men more romantic than women?
Posted: 9/12/2007 6:23:47 PM
I think d.a.ling nailed what romance is...

I think men tend to be the gender that practices romance more often. Not always for the right reasons though.

I have only had two ladies in my life that I would say went out of their way to do little things that I considered romantic. Don't know why that is, maybe women think men would not appreciate it but I think most would.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 372 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/20/2007 1:27:55 AM
lol agreeing to disagree.....

you're alright....I am glad it was a good experience for you, you were lucky as my son was (post further up the long list) I just feel for those who were not as lucky.

Take care, you're gonna do alright in this life...keep an open mind like you have

FYI has anyone noticed the OP hasn't been on this thread for several days now....hope he ain't killing anyone....kinda of...
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 369 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/20/2007 1:12:50 AM
oh sam I have to respond...so you are saying she is not mature enough to know if she is not on the pill or using a condom she shouldn't have sex? But she is old enough to take the chance that she could end up being responsible for a baby?? You have helped make my point...a 14 yr old is not old enough to be having sex with or without protection if she doesn't know she shouldn't have sex without any protection.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 367 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/20/2007 1:06:27 AM
You are right they shouldn't have jumped on your back....this is a place to share opinions and thoughts…that is how we all learn…you can’t learn if you never listen. A day without learning something is a day wasted.

Now that you were honest about agreeing to some of my points I’ll be honest and say yes you are right, they will probably still find a way to have sex unfortunately. But it is every parents job to do whatever it takes to TRY and ensure that their childs life is as safe, healthy, and rewarding as humanly possible. If they don’t then in a way they fail as a parent…lets not say fail…lets say they get a C for trying.  Parenting is the single hardest thing I have ever done….okay maybe not the hardest but pretty close…it is the single most rewarding thing I have ever experienced though.

Parents that just throw their hands up in the air and say … oh hell she is going to do it anyway….here’s the pill…good luck….emmmm I’m not impressed and it doesn’t mean they raised a bad child or they are terrible but they are not doing their part in the safty, healthy, and rewarding part mentioned above and I feel that is so wrong

As far as the 14/20 yr deal. The 20 yr old should know these things I have talked about, he should know what this child is going to miss out on, he should know in the long run the chances are it will not be a lifetime commitment so why should the childs childhood be destroyed…kinda of a strong word…lets say forfeited…so they can be together for a couple years and have sex? It’s not worth it. If we let the 20 yrs have their way with our kids…someday it will be the 21 yr olds who think they should be able to have sex with a 14 yr old…and on and on and on. We have to have a stopping point and since most 20 yr (18yr olds) are suppose to be mature and considered an “adult”…something they wanted all their teenage years…then they should be held accountable to the rules of being a grownup. Even if the laws says he can have sex yet he knows all these things…he in good faith should still not have sex with the young girl out of respect for her and her future. Sorry I rambled…..I’ll go now. Take care and don’t let em beat ya up…you did a good job standing up for yourself. 
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 363 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/19/2007 11:54:07 PM
That Sam and Mel

Couple questions?

would you agree that the "pill" is not 100% absolute?

would you agree that a baby born to a 14yr old would not be fair to the baby or the 14 yr old?

would you agree that a baby born to a 14yr old would be a life altering event that is not always a good event?

Would you agree that there would be a slight chance, slight i know, but would you agree that there is a slight chance the young lady could end up getting pregnant?

If you answered yes to any of the questions above that is the reason a 20yr old and 14yr old should not have sex…if for no other reason. It is bad enough that there are young adults in there 20’s having babies and can’t handle it. That is why parents like myself are so passionate about this topic, no parent wants their childs’ life to be any harder then it really has to be and they know that there is that chance, ever so slight, but still that chance the 14 yr old could end up pregnant. Not to mention the things she will miss out in her teenage years.

It would be like taking a dozen hand guns, putting one bullet in one chamber of the 12 guns and telling you child, it’s okay…grab a gun, point it at yourself but nowhere that it will kill ya, and pull the trigger and see if it fires…It won’t kill ya but if you point it at your foot it is going to hurt like hell and you may end up limping the rest of your life…I mean this is a drastic example but do you see my point?

I am sorry personal attacks were made, this is just such a troublesome topic for a parent to think that “what if it was my 14 yr old”. I am sure they meant no harm.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 77 (view)
 
Have You Ever Lived With A Musician??
Posted: 4/18/2007 6:57:18 PM
I did....it is great and he is totally awesome...music all the time...oh wait i would be talking about myself...that's not what you meant.....LOL we're not all drunks and druggies..
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 157 (view)
 
Have you really ever felt really lonely?
Posted: 4/18/2007 6:34:08 PM
James...a lot of reason why a married person may be on this site...maybe they married after becoming a member....see some have been on this site longer then 3-4 mths.

Some are here because some of their friends are still here....

Some are here to pizz u off apparently....and

some are here because they are married but LONELY and enjoy the friendships they made here...

see how I got on topic "lonely"...that is several years experience....lol
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 323 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/18/2007 3:28:47 PM
No double standard here. I tried to stop my son...he hated my AZZ (so he said) for a while. I knew the girl, her father and I knew each other and he was just as pissed as I was. My worry was what if the next thing was a baby....could you freaking imagine your 14 yr old being responsible for another human life....I won't say they never got together but we made it as hard and as impossible as we could.

Like I told him...there is so much life ahead of you why rush to be grown up, why take a chance of creating a baby...be glad your a kid...if you want to play grownup practice paying the bills around here for awhile. I would love to be a kid again.

After the talk/argument the last thing I said....I realize you are a kid and you will both most likely try like hell to be together and I am going to tell you two things...I catch ya, I'm calling the law because I am a grownup and that is what I have to do...I am suppose to do what I think is best for you...and for Christ sake if you do hook up use protection and I tossed him a condom. I said you promise to use that thing if you two hook up....oh he promised...

that's when I told him lesson number one...things are not as they always seem, you may think you are madly in love and by using protection you'll be safe...but that condom you just promised to use has a pin hole in it because I put it there... and if you use it you just might knock her up....my point is you never know....should have seen his face...made my point

I let her know what I was going to do...(Her family and our family are friends)I told them if they really loved each other so much then they should be able to wait to have sex...if they were so in love they will have their whole life to have sex.

Her father and I talked allot the next few years...if one went out we call the other parent to see where the other half of the sex machine was....we tried like hell to not ever let them be alone...and I never caught them alone..and I tried...I Would HAVE CALLED THE LAW and her dad was supportive of that...

fast forward...when he turned 19 they married, 22 and they just had their first baby, he's got a pretty good job and is doing good....as much as he hated me then you would never know it today. (these things don't always turn out this good folks but I did what I thought I had to do)

I asked him not to long ago, because they were teasing me about how I drove them nuts, if they were ever able to hook up....he laughed and said once or twice but between you, her dad and my brothers and sister informing on me who could get away with it.

I really wanted him to go to college but am glad I did what I did because if she would have gotten pregnant before he finished school I am sure he would have quit HS and tried to support his kid. He missed out on allot of school dances and other functions because he was so in love with her...I still pray nothing ever happens were they break up and he regrets it all...I pray they last forever!!!
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 319 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/18/2007 11:11:34 AM
Shieldvulf well stated
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 301 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/17/2007 10:33:23 PM
OP you may want to look into this.....

mfh2112 may be on to something here....this is part of what I found on the internet on the Bill....I feel for you and the decisions you have to make. Take care.

I should note...I don't know about Canadian laws and this may have changed some before it was passed...

BILL C-2: AN ACT TO AMEND THE CRIMINAL CODE
(PROTECTION OF CHILDREN AND OTHER VULNERABLE PERSONS)
AND THE CANADA EVIDENCE ACT*
Introduced on 8 October 2004,(1) Bill C-2 proposes amendments to the Criminal Code and the Canada Evidence Act intended to “protect children and other vulnerable persons from sexual exploitation, violence, abuse and neglect” and to provide “testimonial aids for vulnerable victims.”(2) Bill C-2 pursues those objectives through a three-fold approach. First, the bill will expand the scope of some existing offences, narrow the availability of statutory defences and/or increase penalties available following conviction. Second, the bill proposes the creation of new offences relating to “voyeurism.” Finally, Bill C-2 proposes a variety of procedural reforms intended to facilitate testimony by young persons and broaden the courts’ ability to accommodate the needs of children and other vulnerable witnesses in a variety of criminal justice proceedings.
BACKGROUND
Bill C-2 constitutes the Government’s response to a wide variety of recently articulated public concerns. For example, a 2001 resolution of provincial Ministers of Justice had urged the federal Minister to raise the age at which a young person under 18, but over 14 years of age, can validly consent to sexual activity with an adult. That and a number of other issues affecting child victims were canvassed in a Consultation Paper circulated by the Department of Justice in November 1999.(3) Presumably as an alternative to raising the age of consent in all cases, Bill C-2 expands the offence of “sexual exploitation.” At present, section 153 of the Criminal Code makes it an offence for an adult to engage in sexual activity with anyone over 14, but under 18, where the adult is “in a position of trust or authority” towards the young person, or where a “relationship of dependency” exists. Following Bill C-2 amendments, an adult’s sexual contact with someone in that age group will also constitute an offence where the relationship is “exploitative of the young person.” The maximum available penalty is increased from five to ten years’ imprisonment and minimum penalties are imposed. At the same time, the maximum penalties for convictions under section
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Romantic gestures .... Why are they needed ??
Posted: 4/17/2007 1:01:40 PM
Romantic gestures I believe are only Romanitc if the person receiving the gestures finds it romantic...otherwise it is just a nice gesture on your part...not romantic. Romantic to some are flowers and candies, to some it is off the walls things like leaving the house in the morning just to rush back in for another goodbye kiss because the first was so good and you love em so much or a dance in the park in the rain and to some it is doing things like back rubs and things.

The question is do you love her enough to do the things she finds romantic? Maybe the thought of doing something that is not necessarily something you would do tells her she is special to you.

just my thoughts....
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Anyone got back with their EX before??
Posted: 4/17/2007 12:31:59 PM
Indigo...LOL I have been on this thing forever reading post and even once in a great while I even spout off a time or two...but damn I sure get a kick out of your post at times.

I wouldn't recommend it twice...not sure I recommend men and women living together the first time...LOL but hey I'm a sucker living in a nightmare....
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 283 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/17/2007 12:19:07 PM
Guy with the horse. Speaking of horses. Why dont U get off your high horse. Im not interested. In satisfying your terms or expectations. U obviously have your mind made up. And nothing anyone could say will change it. But thankfully your opinion. (and mine.) do not matter in this situation.


If that was the case I wouldn’t have asked for someone to give a circumstance where it is not wrong…I have yet to hear one


I could waste alot of valuable typing time. Trying to explain to U the vast difference. In your scenario. With your horse. Not the least of which being. That they are completely different species. And have very few parallels between their behaviors. If any at all.


You are correct in that they are very much different…I was simply trying to make a point that a horse and a dog are very much different though they can duplicate the behavior of the other…as well as a 14 and 20 yr old are very much different.


Your an incredibly naive person. It plainly shows in your posts. And an irrational one. I cant possibly have a meaningful debate with someone like that. Once again, I have better things to do with my time. Than try to reason with U. How old were your grand parents when they married and had kids? Well let me cut in with some historical fact. It was completely normal.Estimating from your probable age. For people to be married. With children.By the age of 14. Here in the US. And is still the norm. In innumerable locales. Around the globe.Or for that matter. In fact, in several places. And classes. Still here in the US. Not to mention that even sheltered youth. In this day and age. Have more intimate access to sources of facts. Pertaining to the facts of life.
Than the preceding generations of humanity. Its a concept I like to term. Forced human evolution.


Naïve.....chit I have lived it…I raised 3 kids as a single father (x was bi polar and made life a roller coaster but I tried to keep things for them as normal as possible). They have all turned out great. Won’t say it was easy, but all 3 were raised in the same enviorment but so much different was one, fought authority all the way no matter what, he was young….I can tell you at times he swore he hated me and would forever. We are so close now and at times even reflect and laugh at some of the things he put me through. It was brutal at times but glad I stood my ground for his sake…if I hadn’t God only knows what life would have dealt him but I am sure it would not have been good. He would probably be sitting in a dark room on a computer talking out his AZZ cause his mouth knew better.


Once again, I feel your a person. That has no understanding of the past. Therefore little of the present. And probally adsolutely none, of the future. Study subjects like child psychology. Adolescent neuro development. Sociology and a myriad of other subjects. That I dont feel like listing here. Though including theology, culturalism, biology. And etc etc etc.


Thank God for search engines eh?


Nm this is a pointless interaction. In relation to a situation. That I really dont care about anyway. OP consider my advice. Dont consider my advice. Ill just write it off as typing practise. And end this, with a good luck. 2 U and your daughter. But bare in mind the fact. That it is better to do nothing. Than to do the wrong thing. Cuz just when U think something cant get any worse. Buckle your fooking seatbelt. On that note tc peeps.


You said it not me….
don’t care
wow you really are going to make a difference in this world.
Better to do nothing then the wrong thing

Unreal…thank God people in our past did not share this feeling…..think of all the things that HAVE change…what if they would have thought….hmmm well it might be wrong to free the slaves…ahhh hell lets have another beer and do nothing….better to do nothing than the wrong thing…





PS,... Fook sorry that this may seem overly harsh. But I call it. Like I see it. ty and cheers

PS2,... There goes 12 mins of my life. Ill never get back :D


little harsh but I’m a big boy and can take it… I just consider the source

I am betting you have not RAISED kids. I’ll waste no more time with you.

To the OP best of luck and do what your heart tells ya to do…hope it all works out. I will not be posting on this thread any longer which will make Blah blah feel better.
Take care all
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 273 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/17/2007 6:57:06 AM
Mriendeau - just because something is not against the law does not make it right. humans make the laws and humans are prone to make mistakes or be misguided. I still haven’t heard a reason (circumstance) why this law is not wrong.

BlahBlah101 – I taught my horse to sit like a dog but it does make her a dog. A child (teen) acting like an adult does not make them one either. Inside they are still a child and need guidance. The mature ones maybe less then others but still need guidance at times. I think this qualifies as one of those times.

The only stupid thing he can do is to do nothing at all

I still haven’t heard a specific reason (circumstance) how a 20 yr old and 14 yr old is okay.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 269 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/16/2007 11:45:54 PM
Mriendeau can you give me an instance (circumstance) where you would think it is okay for a 20 year old and a 14 year old to be sexually involved and why...for that fact can anyone on this site give me a reason why there would be nothing wrong with it? Cause I can't for the life of me think of one....enlighten my dumbass someone
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 267 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/16/2007 11:37:52 PM
alright I have gone thru all of your post to save time....I apologize if I duplicate any advice already given. I understand you are between a rock and a hard spot...I so feel for you BUT you still have to do something even if it doesn't work and I am not talking violence because violence never solves anything. Anger is not going to help either…stay calm!!!

Ideas off the top of my head…

You say you can’t go to where she is…then I would write one of the most heart felt letter to her laying it all out….let her know how your heart is breaking, let her know the tears you have shed because of this, explain to her all she means to you and how this situation is so important to you. Let her know you are only getting involved because of how much you care and love her…tell her if you didn’t love her it would be easy because you would do nothing or say nothing to her about it and that the only reason you are saying anything about it is because of the love you do have for her. Admit to her you are not perfect and have made mistakes and you are only trying to help her not make a huge mistake. Tell her you pray she will forgive you some day for trying to stop this madness. I mean you need to pour your heart out, tell her you’ll do anything she wants if she does not do this with her life at this young age. Tell her it is not to late to stop, most importantly tell her you will love her no matter what decision SHE makes (make her feel in control make it her decision) and pray she will love you no matter what you say or do…and I would give it day or two after the letter and call her…see what she says. If she hates you now, when she is older (our age with kids) she will have nothing but the highest regard for how her daddy tried to stand up and do what was right for her and how much he must have loved her.

Chances are it may not make a difference but you tried the nice way…

Other thoughts….hire a detective to follow this guy…20 years old…seeing a 14 year old…he’s apparently has no morals so chances are he’s playing around with other girls…get proof…give it to her…it will hurt but she’ll be safer and wiser.

If that doesn’t work you spend the rest of your life making calls and getting involved in your country to get that dumb ass law changed….radio, TV, politicians…get the heat turned up on this subject in your country…politicians will change laws if they feel they are going to lose to many votes come election time. Anyone in Country/State with this damn low of an age of consent should get involved….or at least change the the non-custodial parent can’t press charges.

You may be responsible of saving another family going thru the same thing….that will look pretty good to St. Peter at heavens gate….What are ya going to tell Jesus if he ask about it…oh I knew about it but I couldn’t do anything about it…naaaa your not going to do that….you my friend have just been giving a cause in life…a calling of sorts…step up and do something.

Best of luck to you…my thoughts are with you
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 266 (view)
 
My 14 yr old dating a 20 yr old and on the pill
Posted: 4/16/2007 10:55:15 PM
I'll be honest I didn't read the other post for a change because if you haven't done something yet time is a wasting...

I don't know what being in different provinces has to do with it...but if I had to I would drop everything and move my AZZ if I had to but I would put a stop to this in a heartbeat, a New York second, like the day I found out I would have been on this like stink on chit...damn man you are her father. Protect your child no matter what it takes, yeah she may be mad at you and swear she hates you but at least she'll be safe...get off this computer and start making some freaking calls...it's our job as parents to protect our children....I don't even want to hear any excuses because as far as I concerned there ain't a one I will buy...I would do whatever it takes.

Only thing I want to hear is that you did SOMETHING...I am no Bible thumper but doesn't it say something in the good book about protecting our children....I'm trying every angle to get you to do something ASAP....shoot you stop this and I'll buy me a bible and send ya the receipt to prove it....DO SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 85 (view)
 
If you've had cancer or an illness at what point in a relationship do you tell
Posted: 4/16/2007 10:37:50 PM
Gutiarnyack…Well you brought up many memories…though I have never lost a mate to an illness I was there the day they told my father he had 6 mths…(he made 2 yrs)was there when he took his last breath. He asked me to play at his funeral and sing Amazing Grace and I’ll fly Away….I did…it was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life…I made it thru the songs and bolted out into the cemetery and cried like a baby….we always played together…I didn’t pick up my guitar for several years after that…couldn’t do it without crying. Anyways….enough of that…

If I could say one thing that would stick with anyone reading this….I would want it to be this. None of us are guaranteed a tomorrow, do not hold back kind words you could say, nor hold back the kindness within you, treat everyone as though it is the last time you may see them. You’ll be surprised how much better your relationships and friendships will be…it’s incredible. I decided to do this when I lost a close buddy of mine (killed in Cuba while serving in the Marines) he always brought the best out of me when alive and even in death he still managed to make a better person out of me. God I loved him like a brother…but never told him….I do tell my 6 brothers now that I love em…it’s even fun watching a couple of em squirm…..hehehe

Anyway…I rambled…sorry….ON TOPIC though…

I would tell early on for a couple reasons…it will give the person the opportunity to do some soul searching. I still believe in the general goodness in people, I see the goodness many times right here on POF, right here in this forum. Unfortunately there are some people that for some reason would not want to deal with this type of thing, and will run like a rabbit from a dog. Myself I would not want someone like that in my life whether I was sick or not.

For the comments about people staying out of pity…I highly doubt it if it is told early on, someone that is that closed minded will stay out of pity, they will make an excuse to get away and you’re better off if they do.

One last p.s…..am I getting old….why do women always have tissues….first it is extreme home makeover and now this thread….I’m a guy so I am going to get some bathroom tissues…
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 98 (view)
 
Grow some balls - What do you think?
Posted: 4/16/2007 4:38:30 PM
few problems Sensitive....
I couldn't get involved with someone if I wanted to, I'm to old, to short, wrong color hair, to much hair on the face, and I sink like a rock when it comes to water, I do enjoy driving but as far as the flying...only because works requires it. Guess I'm a land lover...hehehe other than that ... WOW perfect match ... LOL Seriously though, it's a beautiful profile and I hope you find everything you are looking for... don't worry about the nut cases that send emails like the one you received. Ignore and block.

Actually, I'm just glad someone has a longer profile then me.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 84 (view)
 
Grow some balls - What do you think?
Posted: 4/15/2007 6:27:47 PM
I enjoyed reading the profile. Very well written. Of course I don't even come close to her wants and wishes but I say more power to her for knowing what she desires. The profile is suppose to be an informative area to tell people about your likes, desires and wishes...another words...I I I I I I I the more I's the more you are telling people about yourself....it's beats...

Hi mine names ??????...feed me booze I give you what u want...anyone for Cyber...

She took time to put herself out there in her profile and did a nice job....stop beating her up for it.

The guy that sent you that email was an idiot. In real life he is probably a real life nutless wonder and by emailing you made him feel like man in some sick twisted way.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 6 (view)
 
saying I love you
Posted: 4/15/2007 5:35:37 PM
I love you is thrown about so much anymore I really wonder if the words mean anything to some people.

2 mths and "in love".....2 soon. you're still in the courting peroid..that period when SOME people but on their best to impress instead of being themselves. BIG MISTAKE.

Some say "I love you" to a person instead of saying what they really mean...I love having this fun right now because I haven't had this much fun with anyone for quite sometime.

So in the beginning I would say he was saying it to impress, to get you...everyone desires love, some use this to their advantage....now time has gone by and either 1.) he doesn't love you but doesn't want to give you up to find true happiness...it is hard for some to give up the prize from their victory. or 2) he just doesn't need to hear the words so he doesn't feel the need to say it...that's a shame. If you are the type that desires the words (just makes sure there is actions behind the words) then I would move along and cast the fishing line back in the water...
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 55 (view)
 
help, what can I do??
Posted: 4/15/2007 5:09:08 PM
If you're doing things right and not just being a two pump chump roll over and sleep I got to believe she is going to want it 4-5 times a week if not more. When having sex (making love) make it ALL about her...ALL!! don't worry about if you're gonna bust a nut or not...trust me when you find what makes her tick, her tickle spot and when you see her get totally off you'll get your reward. Woman are different so forget what you're last girlfriend said about what a stud u were... new girl new ways...find her tickle spot and I think the drives will equal out. Tickles spots is not everything....sometimes the lack of quality time after sex turns a woman off...so don't do the 2 2 roll over and sleep. the 2 2 being saying I love you...god I love you, stroke her hair/head twice and roll over and sleep...talk to the woman. If your planting your face in the pillow, doing the 2 pump, rolling over and going to sleep she ain't never going to get her motor running. Make sure to connect with her...more can be said with eye connection / actions than with words sometimes.

If your doing all this...you said she was aggressive....so buy her some leather, whips, chains and turn her loose on your aZZ....LOL poor guy...not my ideal of loving making but maybe hers....

One other note...sex is NOT everything and shld not be a major consideration in maintaining the relationship. Do you know how hard it is to find that one person you just really click with...that you just enjoy being with. Shoot, lets say your maddly n love with a woman and her with you...would you want her to drop you in a heartbeat if something happened to your package and it no longer worked....If you connect on every level except sex.....I say try things out...work on it...never know...

Zeekfire....LMAO
Ron9 after reading yours I wanted to shoot myself but I was laughing so hard I missed
Gypsy - probably the best advise
Firefighter...LMAO you got to much time on your hands at the firestation...lol
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 46 (view)
 
I need some advice...
Posted: 4/13/2007 6:31:44 PM
lol the guy that said the least has a good idea.....go with what Jimi said above. You'll be doing your part as a freind and there is no reason why she needs to know you sent her the link/ No one needs to know...well except us.. ;) lol but at least she will be inform and then the ball is in her court. I hope it all works out....sorry I called your friend a scumbag
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 28 (view)
 
I need some advice...
Posted: 4/12/2007 5:58:42 PM
There is nothing to think about. If she is a true friend you would not stand by and let her be played, used, or hurt by this person. I like what Icon said but he will simply delete and deny he was ever on the site, your friend being in love will want to believe him and most likely will believe his bull poop with no proof. If your friend was getting ready to walk into the path of a speeding truck wouldn’t you stop her? Well having your heart stump on hurts just as much as a truck hitting ya. My thoughts are simple, keep your opinion out of it unless they are asked for, and simply show her the site and profile and let her make her decision. My guess she will need a friend, be that friend and support her.

As far as your friendship with the male, well if you believe he is a player, someone that uses and hurts people, do you really want a friend like that? You don’t strike me as the type to hang out with scumbags…so don’t worry if he gets his feelings hurt…he’s an idiot that makes it hard for the nice guys. If your friend is truly a nice, caring and honest person he lost out big time because these days these qualities are hard to come by.

Just my thoughts….
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 232 (view)
 
At what point do you give up on Romance?
Posted: 1/17/2007 9:44:49 PM
At no point should you give up on romance!! Know in your heart you deserve it, believe in it, hopefully it will happen. I would rather live life alone than settle for less again. Be happy with yourself and the life you have now, you don't need another person in your life to be happy, if you do, you need to reconsider getting involved. You must find your own happiness before you'll find true happiness with another.

and for the ladies who think all men are just out to find sex you are sadly mistaken. My profile has been the same for about a year and I am sticking to it...I have had plenty of oppurtunity to have sex and have chosen not to because for one reason or the other the person(s) I have dated in the last year I just didn't feel the "it" factor. You know, when you meet the special person and you just know this is "it".
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 52 (view)
 
Plentyoffish, Now with Flowers.
Posted: 10/12/2006 7:24:13 PM
Lyrical girl may have something here....

I am just going to throw this out there and see what sticks....

Have you tested this to make sure flower shops won't give out address or personal information?

Lets say some sicko sends flowers to someone he/she wants to get involved with...what happens if he/she calls the flower shop and says he/she purchased flowers and wants them to confirm the delivery address...now this scares me...I've already had one stalker from POF and don't need another....lol I would add an option where the receiver can chose to pick up the flowers themselves without giving out personal information. Shouldn't be that hard, instead of giving there personal information for delivery they give a code or something for p/u.

I really like your idea but make sure it is safe. K

Better yet don't let the sender know what flower shop is sending...of course it might come up on their credit card statement later....

tell oh wise one...I'm sure you have this figured out and I am wasting time asking all of this...lol
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Plentyoffish, Now with Flowers.
Posted: 10/12/2006 6:41:26 PM
very nice. One question though...does the receiver get notified who sent them? Maybe you just want to make some strangers day, or you just think someone is exceptional but you're not interested in them as a possible match but like the thought of making someones day...but you don't want to mislead someone...can u send anonymously?
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 251 (view)
 
Who loves it when a man ACTUALLY sings to you?
Posted: 10/12/2006 2:15:47 PM
shoot I sing all the time on the front porch swing in the evening...the horses don't seem to mind though the chickens seem to try and drown me out with all their clucking...guess I am going to have to find a woman and try it out...
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 41 (view)
 
Is there such a thing as being too honest in a relationship?
Posted: 10/11/2006 8:25:14 PM
honesty is the best policy. Lies you will have to remember the details of your lies just in case it comes up again. One lie will always lead to another and another and where will the cycle stop? The truth you don't have to remember...it comes out naturally.

Telling the truth need not be hurtful, kindness and tact goes a long way.

Don't ask me a question if you can't handle the truth...I'll be as kind as possible but I will tell you the truth.

Now voluntarily telling something bad, or insulting to someone unsolicited is not being truthful but just down right mean. If I'm ugly and I didn't ask if I am.....don't tell me....lol
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
This one is for guys
Posted: 4/13/2006 10:17:42 PM
He wld say live everyday though it is your last. Actions speak louder than words. Do unto others and treat others how you want them to remember you if you were to leave this world. No one wants to be remembered poorly. Always be honest, own up to your mistakes and learn from them and move on. Family comes before anything else. Your integrity is something no one can take away from you...only you can throw it away and without integrity you have nothing meaningful.

About women...he would say find one better than mom....and of course mom elbowed him and we wld all laughed. Dad was awesome.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
NOthing serious? What does that actually mean?
Posted: 4/13/2006 9:05:17 PM
it means they are another gutless wonder who can not be honest enough to tell the one they are with that things are not working out between them and he/she is going to go play head games with someone else why he/she tags their "other not serious" g/f b/f along for a ride they really could do with out. think that sums it up. :)
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 27 (view)
 
What are you really looking for in a potential partner?
Posted: 10/11/2005 6:36:46 PM
LOL - MsPicky I think womb gives it away...pretty sure that would make it a woman he wants.....but it made me laugh anyway...

ot - someone REAL. fakes are a dime a dozen....someone who understands life and appreciates it and practices the art of caring. With that the rest will come naturally.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
This is my first post in Creative Writing....(hope you enjoy it)
Posted: 9/22/2005 5:46:39 PM
bucsgirl,

Now that was beautiful! In the few times we have conversed I knew you were special. But dannnnnng girl that was beautifully written....now that's a profile...a long one but who am I to talk...LOL Hang in there....
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Are you cheating when your seperated?
Posted: 9/16/2005 11:01:12 PM
have to respond...atta some people don't get the divorce for various reason. My second mariage was over year and a half ago (I know, I know I'm a two time loser). We both agree it is over but I haven't pushed the issue to get a piece of paper saying we weren't because she needs medical insurance for an existing condition. If I get the piece of paper there is no way she could get the meds and afford the monthly doc appointments she needs. I don't hate her, nor does she hate me but there was no way we could keep going the way we were...it had to end. I pay for her medical insurance through my work and we live 60 miles apart...at some point if (and that's a big IF) i ever do meet someone that I think is the "one" or she meets someone she wants to marry something will get done but until then I see no point of putting her through the stress. Call me stupid but that's me....just the way I am.

btw - when someone contacts me from here that I may be interested in...I ALWAYS tell them upfront before wasting their time just in case it is something that would bother them....I guess I could get my x to write me a note...LOL
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 84 (view)
 
Have you ever Cheated?
Posted: 9/16/2005 10:49:54 PM
Not in me to cheat...though I have been cheated on..wife with what was suppose to be my best friend....the heck with both of them but damn I miss my big screen tv...LOL
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 6 (view)
 
How long should it take before meeting someone?
Posted: 9/16/2005 10:37:44 PM
Unless your waiting for countrylin ^^^^ now there's a lady!!!

Kseej Tips hat, winks, and waves at his favorite country girl....


Hey country....don't know if I told you about my wild horse....been working with him for 3 mths....he's 6 yrs old and had never been touch by a human...been in pasture all his life...got that bad boy coming up to me now...even taking corn cob from my mouth...almost got the bridle on him today....getting there...anyway...just wanted to say hi..

OT - your being played. Ruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 901 (view)
 
Poetry Collection
Posted: 9/16/2005 10:33:30 PM
Holy cow baby girl, Dad has been gone awhile....900 post!!!! WOW I have alot of catching up to do.
Better be getting dad some of that chessecake...I may be here awhile.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 4 (view)
 
How long should it take before meeting someone?
Posted: 9/16/2005 10:11:51 PM
been there....your being played. Forget her, no matter what lame excuses she comes up with or what terrible thing has happened in her life that she needs money or something else. It took me 4 mths to catch on after two times we were suppose to meet with always an excuse. I had (I know bad boy) sent her some money to help her out of a few spots but you know what...when I told her the bank was broke (the only thing I lied about ...normally don't abide by lying but at this point I knew what was happening just couldn't prove it and anytime I brought it up I was not being trusting - whatever!)the contact became a whole lot less. Then I noticed another profile...her real pic wasn't even close to the one I was corresponding to...I contacted POF and she been deleted three times because they looked into it and was told I wasn't the only one she was playing....and this person is highly thought of in the threads or so it seemed anyway...everyone had such goodthings to say about her...point of the story...if you doubt it...get out of it....relationships shld not be heart tearing experiences...it should feel good 99% of the time. P.S. this person is back on pof again...wonder how long it will take them to find out and delete her again. Me...I'm tired of the games...I'm sticking to the forums and some REAL friends that I have made on here.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 22 (view)
 
How long do you wait to introduce your children to someone you might date?
Posted: 9/10/2005 10:42:10 PM
Just popping in to tip my hat and wave at countrylin.

long time no see...missed ya

ot - countrylin nailed it...don't take em on the ride with you...wait until your sure about the person. you'll know when it's right
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 55 (view)
 
now and then
Posted: 9/10/2005 1:02:32 AM
whewwww I'm about wore out reading all of this...okay here goes...

themaven - I have to say I was right with you when you mentioned the difference in population and maybe the legal immigration may be needed to support the baby boomers getting up there in age...

deadman - what can I say, you make some very good points and I'm with you on illegal immigration and the possibility of others not of the mexican decent sneaking across our southwestern borders to do America harm.

but people.....leave us country folk alone who drive pickups and have gun racks!!! LMAO
I use my gun rack to carry my fishn' pole...they outlawed guns in gunracks years ago..well unless they are in a gun case but then whats the point. LOL

Thought - to stop this slave pay that happens in other countries, which allows them to ship their products to the US and under sell American companies they need to raise the he11 out of duties and taxess for incoming products so the American manufactoring companies can compete and this will create jobs in the US and no need to go to outside of the country to these companies and their slave labor. You ask what does this have to do with the divorce rate...well deadman touch on it...because so many jobs leave this country or illegal immigrants will work cheaper than the average joe/jane can afford to, well this causes money problems for folks because good jobs are limited and others don't pay enough to give a standard of living that people can enjoy...and what is one of the main reasons given when couples are asked what they argue about...yup money.

money problems=arguing = divorce

bet ya'll thought I was off topic but I swung it back around...LOL
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 79 (view)
 
Do guys really mean it when they say I love you?
Posted: 9/8/2005 10:16:28 PM
Oh my Ladydi, close to heart forever...gonna get down there to Fla one of these days to watch you call a gator...as long as you don't feed me to it...lol

I didn't get my corn planted this year so let it go to weeds for the year...damn you shld see all of the sunflowers and I ain't kidding ya...holy crap...you said you wanted a field of sun flowers well darln' I got em.....care for a dance thru a field of sunflowers with me....hehehe.

I haven't been on much lately...I've missed ya....and all yer sweet talkin'...god I love it when beautiful women tease me...hehehehe
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 77 (view)
 
Do guys really mean it when they say I love you?
Posted: 9/8/2005 9:28:30 PM
I ain't saying it unless I'm a feeln' it from the depth of my soul, so if I say it, damn straight I mean it.

My kids, bros and sisters and mother...every time I talk to them....except for the fourth oldest...he's a jerk...no wait that's me....I love me....I love me....really I mean it...lol
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 40 (view)
 
Does anyone understand relationships?
Posted: 9/8/2005 8:39:56 PM
okay I tried to lighten things up prior but to no avail....

Superdave after your last post and combined with your previous...I will only say..... I have two sons who are 23 and 21 and if they were feeling as it sounds like you do
wish for my own death every single day
and
self loathing
. I will not quote from the first post and marked it up as missed pharsed as you say. I would beg and pled with them to go see a professional who might be able to help them sort out the feelings they are having and the cause of those feelings so maybe they could find their happiness.

There is no shame in seeking help....the only shame is not reaching out for help when you KNOW something is wrong in what you are thinking. Just my thoughts....
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 35 (view)
 
Does anyone understand relationships?
Posted: 9/8/2005 8:03:19 PM
daaaannnnng everyone take a deep breath and count to ten will ya...LOL (though I did enjoy reading it all)

OT
Sillyspoke - don't worry so much about the future. Happiness can not and will not be found in another person whether emotionally or sexually. True happiness can only be found within ones self and until a person finds that happiness within themselves they will never be truly happy. Just because they are with someone else, no matter the age or time in life, this is not going to make them happy emotionally or sexually. People can be alone and happy. I am. Yes my desire would to be happy with someone else who has found their happiness but if it doesn't happen I will be happy alone. If you are so worried about your sexual gratification in your later years and worried you may not be able to get it as readily as you like, I guess I would recommend buying some toys and learning the art of masturbation if sex is that important to you just in case. My guess looking at you, you will have no problems...stop worring.
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 22 (view)
 
now and then
Posted: 9/8/2005 7:29:09 PM
Holy crap deadman....take a breath...lol I read it...all of it...in a nut shell folks as I read it he thinks it is everyones fault...everyone is against the Caucasian American and they are taking over our country and it's the Caucasian Americans fault because he allows all other races/countries to do this.

Am I close deadman?

Now I agree with some of your points of flaws in our system. Some of your points on immigration - though I will only agree with the illegal immigration portion of it. I agree nafta is a joke (jobs going out to other countries). I will agree immorality rules because we as a society allow it and yes it is a shame.

But my friend I will not agree with the overall doomsday feeling to your post. We as Americans regardless of race will draw a line at some point and pick ourselves up and right the current wrongs in our society.

Reading your post I couldn't help but think, if people thought like this when my Italian grand parents came to this country what would have ever become of me....Italians at one point in history were seen as scum and worthless...they were not white they were not black and caught crap from both races. Now a days we all call it our country when in fact we are a nation of immigrants....except for the Indian who we as a society screwed.

Wow way off topic....
OT - Divorce rate is what it is because of the many factors mentioned in all of these post no one more than another but the combination of all of them.

Damn deadman you made me get all long winded and on a soap box...dam ya...LOL j/k
 kseej1963
Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 44 (view)
 
When is it time to pull your profile?
Posted: 9/7/2005 7:25:29 PM
ROTFLMAO - have to say I enjoyed reading this thread....

ot; relationships are not suppose to be so much work.....if you doubt it...get out of it. As far as profiles, pull when both concur...and if one put their profile back up I would think that is the hint they are not serious about the relationship. I am glad to hear you moved on...there are better fish in the pond.
 
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