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Thread: Can long distant relationships work?

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 21 (view)

Can long distant relationships work? Posted: 12/12/2007 2:10:36 PM
I just got out of a long distance relationship back in October. We met online in June, chatted and talked on the phone, and finally met in August. I live in Ohio. She lives in NY. I drove up to see her thrice (one of my favorite words). First of all, it was very expensive for me to go up there, even though I drove and stayed at her place the third time. Second of all, it is hard enough getting to know somebody, but it is even more difficult when you spend several days at a time with them, practically 24 hours a day. Third, I started to see signs in her behavior which I didn't like. Eventually, the stress of not being able to see each other took its toll on the both of us, so we ended it. I guess in some cases, it may work, but somebody stated that most of them don't work and I agree.

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 301 (view)

38 and thinking its too late Posted: 12/11/2007 10:06:02 PM
For me, it depends on my state of mind. At times, no. I think she's out there. Other times, well....

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 437 (view)

Thirty and not married Posted: 12/11/2007 10:01:14 PM
I'm 43 and I'm still single. I feel very out of place. I have at times referred to myself as a "man without a country". I can't relate to the people who are married, divorced, or single parents. I haven't found too many women on here in a similar situation; maybe two or three. The few women I've dated in the past year or so (of course, none from a dating site) seemed to care.

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 307 (view)

Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married? Posted: 12/11/2007 9:54:25 PM
My profile right now is set for dating, only because I might have to relocate in June of 2008. However, once that happens, hell yea I want to get married! I've wanted to be married since I was 21.

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 95 (view)

What situations remind you of your aloneness? Posted: 12/11/2007 9:47:26 PM
For me, it's every time I watch some sort of love story on TV.

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 156 (view)

Going back to school in your 30's.... Posted: 12/11/2007 9:40:27 PM
Good for you Snoogles! I went back in 2003 at the age of 39. I got sick of low-paying jobs that got me nowhere in life. Oh, and I got laid off in January of 2004. I had gone during the early 90s but dropped out due to a lack of focus and alcohol problems. Anyway, when I returned in 2004 I was much more focused and determined. I did very well and now I'm almost finished with graduate school. Here's a piece of advice from an old guy. If you have the drive, you'll do well. It's been my experience that students over 30 years of age do better than many of the younger students. Not all of them, mind you, but many of them. However, try to keep some balance in your life. Yes, good grades are important, but not at the expense of hobbies or friends or recreational activities. Good luck Snoogles!

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 110 (view)

annoying dating advice that you've heard Posted: 12/11/2007 9:00:55 PM
I've heard both of these from people over the years. As to the first one, I think people say it because they don't have anything better to say! Actually, I think it should be changed to "you'll find the one when you're not expecting to find the one". As to the second one, many years ago I had to go through electrolysis for clear up my unibrow. The woman at the office who subjected me to more pain than I had ever experienced in my life uttered the famous words "my father always said that if you wanna get laid, you need to go to church" in response to my lamenting about my inability to find a date, even though I wasn't specifically looking to get laid. You know, I'm not a religious man. But if there is a hell, I'm sure I'd end up there if I went to church just to get laid! My close buddy gave me another useless piece of advice. He said, "why don't you hang out at the college?" Yes, just what I want to do. Hang out with the 20 year olds!

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 33 (view)

has anyone tried the other online dating sites? Posted: 12/11/2007 8:43:22 AM
I was on yahoo personals, american singles, and singlesnet.com. I didn't like singlesnet.com because the profiles are so generic; only the basic info on there. The big turnoff, though was that I received emails from profiles which ended up being phishers / spammers. I did IM with a woman I met on there, but she was too much of a partier for my tastes. Americansingles.com was a waste of money. I kept getting notifications that someone was emailing me, and I would discover she was from China or somewhere overseas. Then, when I cancelled, I received an email that there were ten emails in my inbox. I also discovered that many of the women on there were on yahoo, so I signed up for the email service on there. Yes, there were a lot of profiles, but I wasn't getting any replies. My frustration reached its peak back in June, so I re-wrote my "About Me" section where I basically vented. It amazed me that I was talking to women from other areas of the country on cherry tap.com and they were all awestruck that I wasn't taken. After I posted the new profile, I started getting views and a few emails. I ended up cancelling it because I met a woman on cherry tap.com. Most of the luck I've had in the past year was from myspace.com. I met four women on there who I dated. It dried up for me eventually. Same old story. No replies to email.

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 17 (view)

new Eagles album Posted: 12/11/2007 8:09:11 AM
That's why I won't buy it!

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 62 (view)

How did you start playing the electic/acoustic guitar? Posted: 12/11/2007 8:00:36 AM
I started playing because I was into Elvis. My parents bought me a cheap acoustic and later an Ibanez electric. I started taking lessons but the teacher was a jazz guitarist and I wanted to rock! At one point, I quit the lessons, bought a blues book (I was into BB King), and played along to some blues records I had. Eventually, I started playing along to AC/DC records; Judas Priest; Black Sabbath. I don't play too much anymore, but I made good use of the tab books / magazines that are out there.

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 198 (view)

Pet Peeves Posted: 12/11/2007 7:19:54 AM
1) Talk show hosts / news anchors who ask a question and interrupt the guest before he or she finishes answering the question! 2) Bad spelling 3) People who chew gum and have it hanging out of their mouth

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 77 (view)

What name do you call it? Posted: 11/19/2007 8:28:10 PM
I call mine Gilligan. Because he's my little buddy!

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 23 (view)

men that cant get past first email? Posted: 11/4/2007 6:36:31 PM
One-line responses with no follow-up questions pretty much turns me off, especially if I've taken the time to send a long email. The best email I ever received from a woman was well over a page. Then there was one woman on my space. Every reply was no more than one sentence, if you can call four or five words a sentence. Then she got upset sometime later when I quit emailing her. You know, there's no law that says you can't send one a day or two later if he doesn't reply.

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 12 (view)

Helping him Posted: 11/4/2007 6:20:33 PM
Besides all the advice the others have posted on here, have him go super super super slow. But really, someone on here hit the nail on the head, so to speak. If it only happens but once in a blue moon, he's gonna finish rather quickly. I'm speaking from experience here. :) Really, going super slow really works. It's enough to drive both people really nuts, but that's a good thing!

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 183 (view)

.........Stretch Marks........... Posted: 11/4/2007 4:54:32 PM
Doesn't bother me one bit. In fact, I think they are kinda sexy! :) If one person likes the other, physical attributes are of no concern.

Joined: 10/28/2007

Msg: 28 (view)

Long distance relationships: How far is too far? Posted: 11/1/2007 4:18:34 PM
Very interesting topic; one of my favorites in the realm of dating. I just got out of a long-distance relationship. She lived in New York. The actual distance was around 600 miles; at least a twelve-hour drive. We ended up breaking up because of the distance. It was just impossible for me to see her regularly. After that experience, I've decided my limit is about 120 miles. It has to be within easy driving distance so you can see the other person every weekend.

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