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Thread: Why women want guys to come to THEM

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 1030 (view)

Why women want guys to come to THEM Posted: 8/23/2009 1:09:35 AM
Because they spend more time to look good for us than we do for them. Sounds like you're on the self-conscious side more than the self-aware side. What's the problem with being a man and walking up to whom which causes your eyes to linger? Basic fact is women like a man that isn't afraid to attempt to get what he wants. Men without a date 99% of the time are ones who are afraid to ask for one.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 58 (view)

Guys Please help me understand why?????? Posted: 8/23/2009 12:50:26 AM
Well since everyone is different your best bet is to ask him this question. Maybe he's simply a very controlling individual. Maybe he has a wife/gf (don't call me, i'll call you or i might get in trouble). It sounds like it wouldn't work out and i'd move on if this is driving you nuts. Obviously not good for you already.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 112 (view)

~~ When to Tell Someone You Love Them ~~ Posted: 8/23/2009 12:44:08 AM
If you feel it and wanna say it, go right ahead IMO. If that's who you are to want to say it regardless of how long you've been together, why hide who you are? It already will not work if you feel you cannot be yourself and express your feelings. What if you wait a year to say it then find out they STILL do not fully reciprocate the same feelings you have been hiding for months? You just wasted a year of your life. If it's going to work it will. There is never a good or bad time, just the time you make. Use it or lose it.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 88 (view)

When you are horny what is the giveaway??? Posted: 6/22/2008 4:27:14 PM
i rofl'd @ this. Depends on if your looking to see if they are just horny, or horny for YOU. If they aren't horny for you, who cares? If they are horny for you, they will drag you home by the****every time.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 59 (view)

Would you (ladies) initiate a conversation with a random guy you think is cute? Posted: 6/22/2008 4:17:07 PM
In my experience and what I hear from my lady friends, its probably 50/50. But one thing that they all say is they would "prefer" the cute guy that catches their eye to go up and talk to them first. So if you see a woman and she's frequently making eye contact with you, it's normally a signal to talk to her. No need to be shy. I used to think I was no good at starting conversation either, but it's really not hard to do at all. The problem is when there's no ping-pong effect once you start talkin to someone. One-sided conversations are not a conversation I want to have unless i'm talking to myself for some reason. All you have to do is walk up to the woman you want to talk to and say "hi, my name is ___. Whats yours?" That is usually all that is needed to find out if they are interested in you or not. Just ask her about something interesting you've heard recently or ask what brings her to wherever it is you two are at (dont be stupid - a laundry mat or fast food restaurant is not a place for a "so what brings you here today" question. If you wanna ask, i'll give you the answers ("laundry. I gotta go now" and "food. bye") All it takes is practice. You will be rejected and you might not be rejected, that's the twisted part of life where everybody is different with one exception - all women prefer a guy who shows confidence (not being great with chit chat doesnt make you unconfident), and making the first move is an excellent start for showing your not afraid to go for what you want. When us guys all wonder "why is she with that asshole?" I can almost guarantee he picked her up, not the other way around.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 23 (view)

Second date syndrome Posted: 6/22/2008 1:25:58 PM
I've had this before too. I try to maintain respectability by not gettin too close on the first few dates - keeping it more of a friends vibe to get to know eachother. From what I hear my mistake was - if it's going well 2 dates in a row, make sure you give her a kiss at the end of the 2nd date. If I feel we have great chemistry and everything I will easily go in for a kiss on the 2nd date, but if its someone I really like but we still haven't quite 'broken the ice' or I can't quite get a good read on her yet, I'm obviously reluctant to give a kiss. I consider myself quite good at reading people and I don't make a move if i'm unsure. I've never been wrong when I have made a move, but I've been wrong by not making a move a few times.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 92 (view)

2 & 3 hrs phone calls Posted: 6/22/2008 1:11:14 PM
13hrs. 5pm-6am. The bad part was she lived in texas and I in michigan and ran out of phone cards after the first 2hrs. $250 phone bill on a landline. My parents werent pleased. Normally we would talk for 2-3hrs at a time daily. Now somehow it always seems the ones I click that well with either 'arent ready for a relationship' or just wants to be friends and it's not like we sit and talk forever on a debate or something that makes you know things wouldn't work out, just good ole enjoyable conversation between two people with similar interests. Go figure.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 836 (view)

Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters! Posted: 6/22/2008 12:08:36 PM
You can turn a trick for sex, but can't be tricked into sex. It's like saying "I accidentally had sex". I guess it could happen while you were asleep, but that would be considered rape by the unconscious. The problem is people who think having sex with someone automatically means they will be together forever. True, in a serious relationship where both parties truly care for eachother, sex enhances your connection with your partner even more. However, those believing they were 'tricked' into sex only tricked themselves and nothing more. You're setting yourself up if you are having sex with someone solely based on "He/she said they loved me". Whats the difference between having, lets say, a year long relationship with regular sex, then breaking up VS a 4 month relationship, having sex once, then breaking up? The point is, there is no such thing as being tricked into consensual sex, its impossible. You're trying to say "I had sex with them because they 'said' they would give me something in return" - sounds like a really cheap prostitute to me. You dont have sex because they said they love you or think it will make them love you - you cant build what isn't there. When you're in love with eachother it helps build the relationship, when your not in love, its still a fun (hopefully) and beneficial (great exercise) way to pass the time. If you're so worried about someone dumping you after having sex, why do you have sex before marriage? At least if you get married you will get half his shit if he divorces you. (if he wants a pre-nup its a sure sign he's up to something) True, there are a lot of men and women that enjoy having casual sex, but I guarantee MOST of them would tell you if you asked (lies to this type of question are usually easy to detect if brought up suddenly) and very few would string you along, payin for dates, spending time with you, calling you, and whatever just to have sex with you once. Just because you may have been dumped coincidentally after your first time having sex doesn't always mean thats all they were after. Pay attention to all aspects of your relationship. It's easy to get lost in the bliss of meeting someone new that you feel could potentially suit you long term - so when suddenly things change you're left dumbfounded and the last thing you remember was the sex so that's your answer. In hopes of appeasing somewhat to those who still believe the garbage that you can be tricked into sex - wait till marriage to have sex.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 832 (view)

Do you think there should be laws against people who trick you into sexual encounters! Posted: 6/22/2008 8:32:14 AM
Thread should be deleted. Nobody gets tricked into having sex. You have sex with someone because you want to, not because "oh im in love, so i guess i have to let him **** me". Hey, maybe the sex was REALLY BAD when your friends finally had sex with the guys so he left. Ever think of THAT? Or on a lighter note, the sex wasnt good enough to make up for your friends emotional defects. Who knows. If your friends are being 'destroyed' by this, be a friend and tell them to wait till marriage for sex or tell them to grow up rather than posting ridiculous threads.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 62 (view)

The truth about Jealousy Posted: 6/19/2008 2:00:46 PM
Jealous: Fearful or wary of being supplanted; apprehensive of losing affection or position. This is the definition I believe is correct when used in the relationship context. I do not see anything 'wrong' with being jealous necessarily. To me it shows you are wanted. I do not believe it has anything to do with not trusting your partner. If I see some random guy obviously trying to pick up on my woman I will be jealous and put a stop to it. If I let the guy try to pick up on my woman it shows that I could care less. What kind of woman wouldn't want her guy to step in if another guy is picking up on her? A slut I think. I'm not jealous because I don't trust her, but because I don't like others trying to steal a big part of me. Trust is for when you're not together, jealousy is for when you are.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 27 (view)

Kissing.... Posted: 6/16/2008 8:06:00 PM
Just tell him how you want to be kissed and go from there. Everybody is different and there is no such thing as the 'perfect' match. All aspects of a relationship tend to need at least a little work to get the pieces to fit just right as most of the time they dont just fall into place like we want to believe.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 25 (view)

New law makes it legal to sue homewreckers. Posted: 4/21/2008 8:48:19 PM
What a world we live in. Creating more and more ways for people to be blameless and indulge in greed. It seems we seriously wont be able to marry and still have friends anymore in fear of gettin them sued by our spouses, lol. "stay back, im married! you potential homewrecker you!" The only one responsible for being a 'homewrecker' is the one in the relationship doing the cheating and not the one they are cheating with. Odds are that the **** buddy has no idea the other is married and even if they did, the married person is still the only one accountable for THEIR OWN MARRIAGE. If you disagree with that, you in fact are a worthless, weak-willed individual who can't account for anything.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 2755 (view)

GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage? Posted: 3/18/2008 12:38:00 AM
Yep. I sure would if that was what she wanted.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 66 (view)

Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive? Posted: 3/1/2008 11:59:05 PM
To me a separation is when one or both members of a relationship need ALONE time to reflect on their relationship and where things are going. A time to gather thoughs and feelings in order to talk about what is going on. It's not a 10 month vacation in sin city. It is not a reason or excuse to date or sleep with other people - unless your delusional, immature, and selfish. I will say that to anyones face who challenges this fact. In what way possible could it be a good idea to date others in a separation period? Your simply hiding from your problems in doing so, not trying to fix your situation at all. You are in fact making things worse. Message me if you've ever been separated and got back together knowing your partner has been sleeping around during that time and feel great with them now, or if you got back together with them knowing you've been sleeping around and tell me things are perfect. Message me if you are still together and how many faithful years you've been together since the 'trial sex run'. I'd be suprised to recieve one message, but i'd be big enough to congratulate you on so far surviving a disfunctional relationship. There is never a good reason or excuse for cheating ever. It is something I would/will never forgive. I do not see cheaters as human and will not treat them like one. If you have to stop and think even for a split second to decide if you're single or not - it's cheating. You know if your single or not regardless of what paper might tell you. If your not sure, I'd figure that out before you decide to 'try somethin new'.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 436 (view)

Question for the guys...Should us women say NO SEX on the 1st date BEFORE the date? Posted: 2/29/2008 4:31:46 PM
Kinda funny. Every single time i've been told that, I find myself being led to the bedroom and stripped down and waking up at her place the next morning.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 103 (view)

Good Kisser? Says Who? Posted: 2/29/2008 4:30:29 PM
I've been told I was a good kisser by every woman i've ever kissed. And I've been kissed by them since they've told me, so I'm sure they weren't just sayin that unless it was a "maybe next time will be better" thing, lol.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 137 (view)

How do I tell my date his breath is awful? Posted: 2/29/2008 4:26:45 PM
Women that don't tell a guy what's wrong with him in her opinion are why there are so many clueless guys out there. just tell him. it's for the best.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 10 (view)

Need help in relationship Posted: 2/28/2008 3:55:10 PM
I'll have to read that when I get a day off work. Good luck with whatever you posted.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 24 (view)

sweet guy but Posted: 2/26/2008 5:22:02 PM
Just tell him and let fate decide. Nothing you can do about it.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

what if you knew a man who was using a woman to profit himself Posted: 2/26/2008 5:17:54 PM
Well I personally wouldn't think much of this guy. But I also think that whatever someone wants to do with her money is their own business. If they just started seein each other or something, she should know better. If they were together for a long time, she should know better. If she didn't ask for insight or advice, I wouldn't volunteer it to her. I'm not one to interfere with anyones business unless it's made my business.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 36 (view)

Why are men so hard to read, Posted: 2/20/2008 3:03:12 PM
Men are not that hard to read, neither are women for that matter. When we find someone attractive we may find that we have a tendency to over analyze everything. Trying to find that clue that literally hits you upside the head without having to ask. The only questions unanswered are not asked. If your interested in someone and it's obvious they like you, why do you need to ask if you should "show how much you're interested"? Be yourself, show your interest, see what happens. What are you waiting for him for exactly? Sounds like if he's doing all the calling and texting he's already interested. Kind of a no brainer. Don't leave him feeling like it's one sided if you really do like him.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 39 (view)

How does the girl approach the guy (or does she?!) Posted: 2/20/2008 2:55:56 PM
I would personally try to meet them on the way out of the gym and just give a simple "hello, how was your workout today?" to kick things off. If they are running out the door I wouldn't try to stop them, but if they are casually leaving then I would go for it. this has got to have a trap.......gimme a break......ill tell u if u approached me id treat u the same way u would treat me......its obvious u are just makin truble so id say hit the road hunny.... anybody have a clue what that guy means? I'm not sure.. but it sounds like he was almost trying to be funny, but such subtle humor rarely works in written form and definitely doesn't work if you can't type very well. Otherwise he's probably out of touch somehow.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 387 (view)

Dinner Date - Who Pays? Posted: 2/19/2008 7:03:22 PM
If your inviting her to a dinner date, or any date period, always expect to pay for everything. If she offers and wants to help pay or pay for something (maybe you go to a bar or something later and she wants to buy you a drink or two) by all means let her. I'd be naturally reluctant, maybe I'm a little old fashioned, but never deny her if she insists. If she's the type that offers but doesn't really mean it, she's not for me. That's just playing games and it's a waste of time.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 83 (view)

single for too long?? Posted: 2/19/2008 5:36:47 PM
I haven't had a serious relationship in 7yrs. The last one lasted almost 2 years and I sometimes find myself feeling that the reason we stopped seeing eachother (mutual) was probably not given enough consideration or thought for possible compramises. I've never been with anyone I felt I such great chemistry with in my life thus far. Since her, at one point I swore off the fallin in love stuff and was just going to have fun, be a 'player'. I got very good at it and eventually found myself realizing that is not who I am and it leaves me with nothing in the end. I began digging out who I used to be and since I've gotten back on track I've only met women which things seemed to start off great, they eventually say they want more out of the relationship, I agree, then before things kick off past the 'friends' part, they disappear. I mean literally, stop calling and everything the very next day after they tell me they want more. It's not easy to just shrug off being hit by a truck over and over for no apparent reason. It seems the only women that stay for any measurable period of time are the ones I have sex with early on. Once I stopped going out just for sex, that's all it seems women want from me. But back to the OP, I find it very true that when you 'are trying' to find someone, it never happens. When you are going about your business and 'not trying', someone always finds you. The being single for so long the single person really wants a long term relationship doesn't make it easy to not try, but it's what has to be done. Live your life and your life will live. Don't make opportunities, but take them.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

You like that new person in your life...and then... Posted: 2/19/2008 3:59:24 PM
Time and place for everything. Same jokes in different settings may cause mixed reactions. Just be aware of context. Some things may be found funny when it's between just the two of you and the same thing might just embarrass them when it's said in public - especially dirty jokes. As far as a suddenly opposing point of view on real topics with joking aside, well maybe they just don't know exactly how they feel yet. Many subjects are very touchy and even the slightest variant of an opinion or wording thereof can completely change the meaning. Seeing as how it's only the 3rd or 4th date and you've been mostly snugglin, lovin, eatin, drinkin, travelin, and all is good... are you sure you haven't just started to open your eyes? Maybe you've been misunderstanding this person with all that fun you've been having and really haven't been payin attention. If sudden changes happen legitimately ( the person really did share the same opinions about things, etc ), you should be communicating with this person and ask what's going on or why they've had a change of heart. Maybe the opinion you expressed in the later social setting got misunderstood or something?

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 139 (view)

Acceptance: I am not designed to enjoy sex Posted: 2/15/2008 11:48:24 PM
goin nowhere, delete.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 28 (view)

When is it too soon? Posted: 2/14/2008 2:53:45 PM
Well for me it seems that women I don't end up sleeping with by at least the 2nd date seem to be the ones to disappear. The ones I do sleep with early on tend to stick around much longer and some of my best friends are those that have been FWB. Nothing is certain. Go with your gut.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 108 (view)

Acceptance: I am not designed to enjoy sex Posted: 2/14/2008 10:19:06 AM
Dyspareunia - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dyspareunia Vaginismus - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vaginismus

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 90 (view)

Acceptance: I am not designed to enjoy sex Posted: 2/13/2008 5:24:21 PM
Do any of these sound about right? Dyspareunia - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dyspareunia Vaginismus - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vaginismus

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 36 (view)

A Kissing Primer - for guys or those who need it Posted: 2/13/2008 4:02:02 PM
I've always been told I'm an excellent kisser. What the OP wrote described me to a T. Be slow and deliberate. Take control, but be sensitive enough to how she's reacting and go with it. It should be a seemingly natural motion with no perceptible feelings of force or collisions if you got it right. Just a feeling that the kiss is flowing smoothly and naturally. Mmmmm

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 39 (view)

Man attracted to sex only but not the person? Posted: 2/13/2008 2:54:04 PM
This thread is probably gettin off topic. The actual question was "what would you think of this person?" This probably shouldn't have been posted in the first place as it really helps nothing at all because our opinions on how to think about people shouldn't affect yours. This thread is just here for others to judge this guy. He probably isn't very tactful, but he was honest. What else could anyone ask for? You know what you think about this person, that's all that matters. If that's not what your lookin for, move on. If it is, great. Have fun.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 33 (view)

Man attracted to sex only but not the person? Posted: 2/13/2008 10:52:59 AM
The sooner people realize you in fact can be attracted to someone only on a physical level the better. Everyone has attraction to people on an intellectual level, they are called 'friends'. They feed their 'urges' with companionship, sharing laughs, helping each other through bad times, but do not want a 'relationship' with each other. How is this any worse than just wanting to feed urges of the physical kind with someone they only find attractive on the physical level? It is not. Those that think people who just want to have sex with someone without feeling any deeper sort of connection are deeply disturbed. Wrapped up in their own self righteousness. Sex is a natural and wonderful thing. It is a fact that people who have sex more often live happier lives. Of course I believe sex with the one you love is by far the best experience you can have, but not all of us are fortunate enough to have met this person yet ( obviously ). Does it mean you love any less because you just want to have a good time on occasion while we lie in wait for the one we want to spend the rest of our lives with? Nope. Some of us who see the simple pleasure in sex will probably be the ones who would love and care for you more than anyone else you will ever meet in your entire life, wrap your head around that for a while. We have our heads on straight and know that sex doesn't necessarily mean commitment. We don't play mind games. We know what we want. Everyone says that a relationship shouldn't be based on sex, but why does everyone think when they have sex with someone they will be together forever, or should be together forever? Lack of nicotine makes me feisty - hate tryin to quit.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 27 (view)

Man attracted to sex only but not the person? Posted: 2/12/2008 5:25:53 PM
It is possible to be attracted to someone in a purely sexual manner and still not want to get into a long term relationship with that person. (Friends with benefits) It is also possible to be attracted to someone on an intellectual level and not find them attractive physically. (Friends) Rules of attraction are not written anywhere, if they are, whoever wrote them is full of it. I've had friends that I was attracted too, but as far as connecting on an intellectual/emotional level, the chemistry didn't feel right for a long term relationship. It happens. He is still probably a really great person, he at least was confident and respectful enough to let you know what his intentions were. Nothin to get worked up about.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 280 (view)

morning sex... Posted: 2/12/2008 5:13:26 PM
Love the mornin quickie. Nothin else makes you feel so ready to start the day!

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 42 (view)

Problems with your man turning you down? Posted: 2/12/2008 5:07:40 PM
The only reasons I would turn down sex are illness and depression (very serious depression). The excuse of stress is a complete lie because sex is the ultimate stress reliever. Even if it means I only get 4 of my 8hrs that night, even the next night too, I always feel great the next day. I would think he's either very sick, afraid to tell you he's not interested in you anymore, or very depressed over something and hasn't told you whats going on.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 58 (view)

Need some advice... re: blowjobs Posted: 2/12/2008 4:01:23 PM
What DOES he like to do with his ****? Does it give him pains in some way when it is touched? Have you asked him why? I would just sit down and talk with him about this. Aphenphosmphobia? Does it bother him to be touched other places other ways? Handshaking, hugging, etc.. If he doesn't like it to be touched and doesn't know why, it would seem obvious that something traumatized him as a child or something. But I would recommend seeing a doctor about it or having a serious talk with him and see if something can't be worked out.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 136 (view)

Worst Breakup Line you ever used or heard Posted: 2/11/2008 3:42:31 PM
Her: "you deserve someone so much better than me" Me: "Duh" Well, thats what I was thinking anyways. If I hear it again I guarantee I will say it. Its also quite a trip when they tell you all the things they said they like about you when you break up that they told you when you got together in the first place. If I found someone too good for me, I sure as hell wouldn't dump them. /sigh

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 85 (view)

Do you find yourself becoming apathetic about finding love? Posted: 2/11/2008 3:36:44 PM
I'll never stop looking nomatter how much it may hurt at times. Don't give up an opportunity of a lifetime because your scared of being hurt again. You can't take a chance on happiness without the 'chance' part. All the pain of wondering if anyone is out there will make the joy of actually finding the person so much better. I'd rather take the pain that comes with the search of happiness than to give up and feel nothing.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 132 (view)

Disappearing Act - How Did You Feel? Posted: 2/11/2008 3:24:08 PM
Been there a few times. The weird thing is that it happens to me when I'm seriously not looking for a romantic relationship with them. I may have thought about it, but I never made any moves except to simply hang out and they would be the ones wanting to move things farther, I would reciprocate the feelings and suddenly never hear from them again. It seems to only happen with women I have not had sex with early on (when im trying the good boy approach). If they just wanted a booty call I'd rather them tell me that than "they want to be with me". Could have been a lot more fun for both of us. It is quite an ego boost to know the women that haven't disappeared are ones that I've had sex with - but I can't stand the feeling of being left wondering what the hell happened. I've put it as far back in my mind as it can go and it doesn't keep me awake at night or anything, but I can't just forget it.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 5 (view)

Hug or a Hand Shake? Posted: 2/11/2008 3:03:27 PM
Geez. Every time I try to simply post something like "I'm a hug person", I end up writing paragraphs about psychology of body language or something, lol. Simply put, I like to give hugs. Not so simply put, I don't go up, arms raised and spanned as wide as possible. I like to keep one arm down, raise my other arm just waist length, extended forward, and slowly lean in to pull her in by the small of the back for a hug. If she hugs back, then I use the other arm. If she reaches her hand out for a handshake, the motion I start with can easily be switched to a handshake without any awkward hug/handshake thing. I wouldn't read anything bad about not feeling comfortable enough to hug the first time your meeting someone. But if they never want or hate hugs, they definitely wouldn't be for me. I'm an affectionate person and I like contact, deal with it.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 27 (view)

So Im not sure how to feel. Posted: 2/10/2008 4:08:08 PM
I would respect his wishes and not call for the week. Separated isn't the same as divorced, I don't believe being 'separated' give you a right to see other people unless you had divorce proceedings underway. I wouldn't get too attached to someone who isn't too detached in the first place. Your possibly just setting yourself up for a big fall. Being married 26 years wouldn't be easy to throw away regardless of circumstances. I don't know that I could stay together after the 1st time being cheated on, been there done that, but time does many things to many people. I don't necessarily believe in a 'waiting period' after you actually leave a relationship to begin a new one. Does it really mean you don't know what makes you happy in a relationship because one didn't work out? Why blow an opportunity of your lifetime because 'the rules say your not allowed to see someone yet'? Life is short, love like there is no tomorrow - one day there might not be. I'd rather feel love than pain, but I'd rather feel pain than nothing - can you know one without the other really? Odds are odds, but odds are just that - you never know till you try, but don't feel like you were totally unprepared if the odds were right. Its your life, live it.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 20 (view)

how often do you get harassed here? Posted: 2/10/2008 2:51:42 PM
I don't quite understand why people would get all worked up over someone not caring to reply to a message or something. I've sent messages that were never replied too, or read/deleted with no reply. Just take a hint and leave them alone. This site is called 'plenty of fish' for a reason. Don't throw your fishing pole away cause you have a big fish in the net because there may be a hole in it. Worms are cheap too - if you stupid enough to pay for them.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 17 (view)

foreplay Posted: 2/10/2008 12:01:17 PM
I personally love the idea of having a diet that consists of an all night all you can eat buffet. My experience is that most women (that i've been with) are not very apt to take as much control as they could. I've only had maybe 2 women that have actually told me what and how they wanted it or helped me position/aid my hands to help them achieve maximum pleasure. I don't think it is necessary to be vocal about what you want (literally telling us what to do), but little nudges in the right direction are nice (all women have their subtle differences in what pleases them best). I also think all women do give their own little subtle clues as to whether we're pleasing them or not (some clues women cant help giving if you do a little research). You have to realize that us men have a tendancy to be worrying about whether you like what we are doing or not and it makes it difficult for us to relax and we can't devote our full attention to listening to every subtle clue when we're trying to last more than 2 minutes. And men, 4 tips: listen, feel, slow down, RELAX! Have fun, thats what sex is meant for. A stress reliever, not builder. Adult 'play'. A way to forget about everything, the ultimate form of meditation. Learn to feel, listen, and respond during sex, not think. Clear your mind. If you finish too early (hey its reality, it will happen at least on occasion to the best of us), you better be putting them hands to work if you want her to have you again (let her know your in it for her as well because im sure you are). Im sure for most of us it only takes a max of 10 minutes to be ready again, and (in my experience) you will last until morning (or nighttime if your a morning person ;) ). And practice practice practice. =)

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

She's still not over her ex... Posted: 2/7/2008 5:11:50 PM
She's probably hopin to get some action from ya while she's waitin for her ex to come back. Maybe he just has money and spends it on her when they are together or something. If you just want some play, I'd probably stick around until you find someone that isn't hung up on an ex. But I wouldn't recommend getting serious about her.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 26 (view)

Exposed... betrayed and hurt - What do I do? Posted: 2/7/2008 5:06:50 PM
Well I guess one side of this would be if you got that kinky with someone you should be prepared with any possible repercussions. How long have you been 'together' with your boyfriend when you decided to take the pictures? Sounds like maybe he's just an idiot with a tendency towards OCD. Trust is a fragile thing, but if that's all he did to ever upset you I probably would give him another chance. Just use a polaroid camera next time and make sure you keep them yourself. Send one to him every valentines day as long as you are together. =)

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 141 (view)

What do women mean when they say I feel safe with him? Posted: 2/6/2008 2:41:07 PM
What else do you want it to mean. Sounds like the subject says it all. A sense of security is a great thing to have in a relationship.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 47 (view)

What is going on? Posted: 1/27/2008 1:04:30 PM
What an appropriate subject for this thread. How far do you actually live from each other? How can you not find time to meet someone you really like? The petty arguments could stem the fact you two do like each other, but not actually meeting is starting to create feelings of resentment/confusion. If you like someone, why wouldn't you have met even after 5 months even once? Besides your "living situation" or whatever (not very specific to give relevant insight), you haven't given any reasons why you couldn't meet up with him. I know I would start wondering if your just messing with me if you say one thing, then every time I try to meet you 'something came up', or 'im waiting to get a situation straightened out first'. What does it possibly have to do with meeting up somewhere for a little while? Don't make yourself a victim of circumstance. Its your life, make it happen if you want, or let him go if you don't. The worst thing you can do to someone is string them along.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 69 (view)

MEN and WOMEN as roomates Posted: 1/27/2008 12:20:40 PM
An unmarried man and woman living together hasn't always been considered normal regardless of their status with each other. That is one reason many people can't help but assume. Nowadays it is also pretty normal for a man and woman to have sex without being in a 'relationship' with each other as well. Us as people have a tendency towards 'seeing is believing'. We do and will judge a book by its cover whether we admit it or not. First impressions are the biggest impressions. I guarantee everyone who says they don't judge at first glance or make any assumptions at that point is full of BS. Whether they allow themselves to act based on those first impressions is a different story. It is inherent for us to do this, but some people can keep it to themselves until they actually know the facts. We who are blessed with vision are and will be visual creatures #1, but the ones also blessed with some form of intelligence use their ears #2 rather than their mouths.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 85 (view)

NEWS year eve alone this year 07/08 Posted: 1/4/2008 12:24:34 AM
I've been sick since about the 27th and my g/f at the time broke up with me at 6pm 12/31/07 on instant messenger. its only been about 2 months, but she said she suddenly realized she needed more time alone since her last breakup and wasnt ready for a committed relationship with me. (damn, 6 years since my last serious g/f, i find a great woman, and this happens for this reason). awell, no point in crying. it doesnt work it doesnt work. time to move on. new year, new notch, maybe even new love. this year will be better than the last.

eroch

Joined: 11/4/2007

Msg: 8 (view)

SEX---->A sacred thing<----Virginity Posted: 1/3/2008 1:27:18 PM
Virginity is such a sacred thing that we alla re born with. It is a resemblance of love, life, freedom and purity. Kinda interesting... sex is also a resemblance of those things. I do believe sex is sacred. Sex should be held at a high level because it holds extremes in itself. It causes life and death. Pain and pleasure. Love and Loathing. Freedom and Entrapment. So many people's focus is on the act of sex itself as being impure. I don't believe this is the case, it's the motivation/reasoning/people behind sex that make it 'pure' or 'impure'. If your not ready for sex, by no means should you have sex. If you are, don't deny yourself an amazing pleasure. Just be honest with yourself and your partner. Communication is a necessity. Be careful and know what your getting yourself into.

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