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Thread: WHATS THE WORST DATE YOU HAD ON POF

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 196 (view)

WHATS THE WORST DATE YOU HAD ON POF Posted: 11/8/2009 8:04:22 PM
Good for you - people should realize there are consequences to their actions - and one consequence is that rude behavior isn't tolerated.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 195 (view)

WHAT'S THE WORST DATE YOU HAD ON POF Posted: 11/8/2009 7:58:50 PM
The drink & Water isn't Bizzar if he is on a health regimen - for training, or a liver cleanse, or ... - what is bizzar is that he didn't mention it before - why not just say something and ask to meet somewhere other than a bar.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 508 (view)

Is kissing more or less important to you in a relationship as you get older? Posted: 7/30/2009 7:12:51 PM
Haven't read all of this but at 55yo, kissing is much more important and pleasurable now then when I was 20 - if my partner doesn't enjoy the sensuality of kissing I would feel some important pleasure is missing from my life.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 117 (view)

Cash For Sex Posted: 5/19/2009 5:52:12 PM
my god - who cares what 2 consenting adults do - grow up everybody - and we really have no idea what the circumstances are - for example, who would be more despicable - she who is broke and needs to feed her kids or him who is taking advantage of this situation. Or things could be flipped and she could know he is desperately lonely and depressed and she is taking advantage of him - or they could both be just enjoying each other and she needed cab fare and he gave it to her. Everyone is so quick to judgment (yes that's right - you are all bad people - oh wait - that's rushing to judgment ;-)

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 14 (view)

When are we men supposed to believe what you women say? Posted: 5/4/2009 6:30:02 PM
MandaKay No means no. Even if she says she didn't mean it. If she says no, stop. Not always, for example asking 'do you mind if I do this' or asking 'do you want to join me for this' has resulted in a 'no' from a previous girlfriend only to later have her say 'I can't believe you did (or didn't) do that' - so yes, if we are talking about the limited set of physical circumstances you are correct but I'm asking a more general question.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 12 (view)

When are we men supposed to believe what you women say? Posted: 5/4/2009 6:21:35 PM
Thanks Chill Pill my picker may be broken or it may be living in KS for the last few years - thinking about it I don't remember having this happen in NYC or Boston or ...

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

When are we men supposed to believe what you women say? Posted: 5/4/2009 6:18:41 PM
Maybe I should clarify a bit. I don't care who pays for dinner or any event - it is the saying one thing but expecting something else that bothers me. I'm not a mind reader and the only thing I have to go on is what someone says to me. Someone said it's a test - I don't care if I pay for dinner - wether it's on a date or sharing a meal with a friend, or whatever - people's answer are focusing on who pays when I'm trying to understand why some people say one thing but see it as a negative if you listen to them.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 1 (view)

When are we men supposed to believe what you women say? Posted: 5/4/2009 4:13:38 PM
I came across this in a profile: "to a nice restaurant (Pay... no matter how many times I offer to "help out", Yep, I said it, PAY )" and I have had similar experience where someone asks me to do or not do something and then is angry that I did as they asked - one former relation would get angry and say 'why did you listen to me' about one circumstance and later accuse me of not respecting her because I didn't listen to what she said. SO - what is the story my female friends? How are we supposed to know what you really mean if we can't take what you say as accurate - and don't tell me I should just know - that's nonsense. What is the prob;em with simply meaning what you say? And I realize I'm generalizing from a few to the many but I have had enough experience and spoken enough to friends to know this type of behavior is more than just toward me or a rare event. Thanks for letting me vent a bit and I would be happy to receive any serious comments.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 14 (view)

Scottish recipes . Posted: 10/3/2008 9:10:54 PM
I recently had this (Scottish Eggs) at a Nigerian event where I was an honored guest - I was very surprised (but they were oh so good) - they also served me Guinness - I greatly enjoyed the evening

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 5 (view)

Has anyone heard of/ tried reiki to aid the grieving process? Posted: 9/30/2008 5:11:56 PM
Sorry - tried to send this privately but you don't accept mail from men. Do it - I've used it on several occasions for a variety of situations - does it work the way claimed - who knows - but there is a mind/body connection on a lot of levels and good bodywork can help - also consider various talking therapies including cognitive and rational emotive. You may be having mild PTSD (yes, post traumatic stress can come from ANY trauma) - in any case, sound like you could use some help - so go get some. good luck Cf

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 110 (view)

Great girl but not much action! Posted: 9/30/2008 5:06:26 PM
Haven't read all the post so if this is redundant forgive me GROW THE F**K UP I could go on and give lots of reasons but if the OP needs someone to unravel the reasons I'm afraid he'd never understand - perhaps this 'great girl' should go find a great guy. 'Never try and teach a pig to dance - it waste your time and annoys the pig'

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 23 (view)

Pasta Bake - so simple, even a single man can do it !! Posted: 9/18/2008 7:11:55 PM
"... even a single man can do it !!" give me a break - I've been cooking most of my life - my dad taught me and I've picked up a lot through life. I've had a lot of women (including my mom) ask me for my recipes just as I've asked a lot of women and men for recipes, tips, etc. Isn't it time to join the 21st century - next we'll have diy projects 'so easy even a single girl can do it' Jeeze Cf

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 240 (view)

Did I overreact? Posted: 9/2/2008 5:57:40 AM
Overreact - perhaps - but you are definitely nuts - talk about high drama

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 50 (view)

Living your dream? Posted: 6/28/2008 10:01:50 PM
sorry about the typos - I can't type and it's late - I'm going to sleep.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 49 (view)

Living your dream? Posted: 6/28/2008 10:00:12 PM
Pausch is a pretty interesting guy - no doubt. As for living my dream - I do that every day of my life - every day I find some reason to do what I do - now it doesn't work every moment of every day - and it doesn't work every day - but each day we are presented with wonderful opportunities - and all we have to do is choose to respond to them - On fri I finished a $4 million dollar grant proposal to provide health care for the state - and also had the opportunity to feel really angry at someone (thus knowing myself a bit better), then had the opportunity to spend time with people I love and finished the night by tucking in my favorite 7 yo - were these dreams I had when I was a child - no - but it was a day of living my moment - to - moment dreams and passions - my passion is for my life. be well all

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 133 (view)

CONDOM? or NO CONDOM? Posted: 6/12/2008 3:32:35 PM
To underline this - my dear, friend had a husband who ran around on her and never used a condom -he brought her home HIV - RIP Mary - This isn't made up - sure condoms aren't 100% protection - and seatbelts and air bags aren't 100% either - but I wond't drive a car without seat belts/airbags/anti-lock brakes/etc - and I won't have sex with a non-bonded/tested woman.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 48 (view)

When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape? Posted: 4/22/2008 8:05:28 PM
OP Rape - I don't know - I'm not a lawyer - BUT - I do teach ethics and I believe this is morally highly questionable - however, since you described her as drunk and drunk implies that she is unable to consent - this would have to be suspect Even more importantly - what type of man do you want to be - Cf

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 61 (view)

Do guys enjoy doing handyman chores? Posted: 1/19/2008 9:37:37 AM
I'm happy to help out friends (male or female) and in fact just did this yesterday - I grew up in the trades so I'm somewhat handy and I'm a decent cook - so maybe my friend would cook, maybe I would - the key really is - are you my friend. If this is a really early then it probably wouldn't be a decent date for me - if we had been out a few times and were at least frieendly, then sure, why not.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 56 (view)

Romance.....a thing of the past ??? Posted: 1/13/2008 10:19:50 PM
I think in many senses romance is a very confused and confusing thing - first there is the issue (evidenced by many of the forum threads) that lots of people have very difference ideas what romance is - then there is also the issues that romance occurs between people - it is not something that a man does for a woman but it is more of a reciprocity - also, the social relations between men and woman have radically changed - it is no longer the case that the man is automatically the provider - often the woman is or both are, etc. Gender based roles no longer make a lot of sense in contemporary society. - and, more importantly, I think it is part of a bigger thing So - I think you (the OP) have a good point about paying attention to the other - but this is more civility than romance - I think that civility is sorely missing in our culture - as an example, my dear friend (a man) made a big career change (something I have done many times) and was anxious about it - so I had flowers delivered to his office on his first day. A female friend (a poet) was being honored for an award with a public reading - when I found out I arranged my schedule to be at her reading - she greatly appreciated it. A woman I went out with a few time had mentioned that she was not looking forward to the holidays and so I made sure there was a book delivered that I suspected she would enjoy a couple of days before christmas (I was out of town) - a new mom was coming home from the hospital and there was lots of baby things - I made sure there was some pampering stuff for her. All these things are just civil behavior - and I suspect that when we behave civilly toward one who we are in a 'dating relation' or some other sexual/potentially sexual relation - then we call it romantic - but I think it is really behaving politely, and civily toward another - and civility is dying in our culture - and I even have a guess why it is - civility is based on knowing on a pretty basc level that your actions effect others - and we, as a culture, have insulated people from experiencing the results of their actions. Enough - it's ;ate and I need sleep - but I have seen dozens of these types of threads and I really felt I wanted to reply. Cf

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 74 (view)

Beards? indicate single? Posted: 1/11/2008 5:37:53 PM
I've work a beard of some type since I was 16 (wow - almost 40 years ago) - in relations, dating, not dating, whatever There are definately women who do not like beards and others who do btw - if one cares for their beard (conditioning, etc) it is soft not scratchy

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 104 (view)

Would you marry a slut? Posted: 1/11/2008 5:32:13 PM
OP you say slut like it's a negative thing

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 41 (view)

A 47 y/o Dad in same bed as 21 y/o daughter? Posted: 1/11/2008 5:25:55 PM
Not sure there is an understanding to be had. Experienced the mirror of this - a 50 yo woman who routinely slept in the same bed as her 19 or 22 year old sons - this was in her house where the boys each had their own room. It is a wierd emotional abuse/enabling . Both your case and mine are pretty dysfunctional parent-child relation.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 28 (view)

Developing Formula require female input. Posted: 1/9/2008 11:39:30 AM
???????????????????? please tell me you are 15 yo and trying desperately to figure out 'girls'.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 65 (view)

What's your favorite kitchen gadget? Posted: 1/6/2008 2:48:33 PM
My Global knif & steel.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 102 (view)

Is this the biggest Hurdle ? Posted: 1/6/2008 1:11:13 PM
My last few relations failed, in large part, from my point of view, because my SO had a 'slot' for me to fill - and this only became apparent (at least to me) after we were together for a while. It took me a while to figure it out. I have been looking for a partner that wants to build a life with me - but it seems that the women I've been dating for the last decade all give lip service to this but aren't really interested - it seems that have 'the husband role' and my only choice is to play that role or not have a relation with them - in fact one told me (after a year) that, if we were going to get more serious (we were planning to move in together) then 'as the man', this is what I was expected to do - and these expectations were so contrary to what we had spoken of before and so 'out-of-the-blue.' Another woman get telling my 'John' (the ex) would do this or that - and when I pointed out I wasn't John - she started saying how happy she was with John and how I should be more like him - I declined to point out that he cheated on her, stole her inherited money, ran off and left her in a lurch, etc. Of course, I have things I want to do with my life, and I believe I am somewhat flexable about them (others may disagree) - but I do have a career I value and enjoy and I have family that I am trying to get geographically closer to - and these would have to be part of a relationship - I'm not going to ignore my career (done that) nor ignore my desire to be closer to mom, sister, bro-in-law & nephews - but I do think things can get worked out - however, my relationship experiences for the last 10 years are that the woman I'm involved with seem less and less flexible about there desires - of course I may be kidding myself about my flexibility or I may be asking much more than I realize - but if this is the case, why can't women who are able to talk about there wants be similarly clear about their reaction to my wants. The human is a very complex beast. Anyway - this is, for me, an enormous hurdle that I'm trying to figure out how to deal with.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 52 (view)

Finding the Ultimate Vibrator Posted: 1/5/2008 4:21:32 PM
For all you want to know - check out 'Good Vibrations" in San Francisco. http://www.goodvibes.com/ enjoy javascript:smilie('')

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 102 (view)

Would you go out with someone in the 45 plus group that has never been married? Posted: 1/5/2008 6:43:03 AM
With about 1/2 the marriages failed - it is hard to look at marriage as a credential. Walking the walk - as you say - is committing to people & ideas and and there are lots of ways to be committed - to careers, to avocations, to people. I'm 54 and have never been married - I have been in long term relations (5+ years - longer than many marriages), helped raised children, cared for seriously ill partners, etc. - If one is going to judge me as unsuccessful in my life because I have never married and ignore all of my life successes - loving relations, loving intimacy, career success, committment to important principles and causes, etc - then we appear to have little in common and there is probably no reason to 'go out with' me.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 11 (view)

Home Alone For the Posted: 12/18/2007 8:58:57 PM
This sound trite but it is true - I have felt that way in the past - then I had to be on duty at a VA rehab hospital over the holiday, or I look at all the people in nursing homes that have no visitors, then a few years ago I spent the holidays sitting with my dad while he was unconscious in an ICU unit (he never regained consciousness) and - while there - I had to put my mom into the hospital for a heart attack. Sort of keeps things in Perspective for me - this year I have no romantic relationship - I'm heading to the east coast (1500 miles away) to celebrate and enjoy all the other relations I do have - see my friend Patrick, see Michael - his wife & child, then my Sis, bro-in-law & nephews & my mom - I am very happy - Live your life - and if a relation is part of that then enjoy it, if it isn't - then enjoy all the other good things that are part of life. Every moment we get to make choices - and good things are all around us - we can choose to focus on them - or we can ignore them - but the will still be all around us. For a 'real life' action that may help - the year my engagement broke up (about a month before christmas) - on christmas eve, I took $200 out of the bank in $10 bills - I went downtown to where the really poor street people were - anyone who asked me for help I gave a $10 bill to - the last $10 I used to buy my christmas eve dinner in a diner. I very very happy and very connected to the worls. I hope you feel better. Cf

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 127 (view)

Is kissing a important part of intimacy??? Posted: 12/16/2007 8:41:56 PM
Kissing is wonderful - when I was younger and - shall we say less discriminating about who I had sex with - I had sex with lots of women but only kissed ones I felt something about - I still find kissing wonderfully intimate.

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 74 (view)

A Relationship Without Sexual Intercourse Posted: 12/16/2007 8:36:31 PM
I can and have and would again have such a relationship - relationships are more than intercourse - relating sexually is more than intercourse

Joined: 11/23/2007

Msg: 122 (view)

enough with the sex already! Posted: 12/12/2007 6:29:41 AM
Haven't read this all so if this is a repeat sorry - I've been single my whole life (54 yo) and I can understand - sex as recreational f***ing is old and tired and quite frankly I'd rather read a book or see a film, BUT sex as part of a sharing with someone you like/are interested in/ love, etc - is wonderful. So first get yourself checked out - it could be biological or psychological and then decide if you want to stay at home (a perfectly acceptable option) or if you want to go out and find people you like, people to share interests, and you may find that one of those interests to share is sexual pleasure. good luckjavascript:smilie('')

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