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Thread: Halloween Party, Friday, Oct. 31st in Coral Springs

Joined: 1/21/2008

Msg: 8 (view)

Halloween Party, Friday, Oct. 31st in Coral Springs Posted: 11/2/2008 12:41:17 PM
Hi Christine! Thanks for hosting the party...had a lot of fun! First time I dressed up in years! When will the pictures be coming out? Roxy

Joined: 1/21/2008

Msg: 785 (view)

Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder) Posted: 9/20/2008 12:20:54 AM
Thank you SV- very well put!!! (I also read your other post on the same page). I broke off my engagement 8 months ago to a man with BPD . I read everything I could get my hands on about this illness and tried everything I could. It is an uphill battle with no appreciation and a lot of pain. Most therapists will not take on BPD patients because of the difficulty and poor prognosis, and difficult to diagnos. My ex was in denial most of the time. When he crossed the line(and I was finished with him) he would agree to take his meds, go to therapy, admit to his terrible behavior,etc. Within a short time he would go off the meds (usually I found out the hard way by his nasty, moody ,impulsive , abusive behavior). When confronted (gently) he would site his ok...so I lied, big deal!! I didn't feel well, they made me tired, etc. They go from putting you on a pedestal one moment to literally hating you another. The cursing, screaming, embarrassing and humiliating you in public or private. The lying, the impulsive dangerous behavior, and disregard for your feelings. They can spend the night telling you how much they love you over and over and suddenly without any seeming reason they want nothing to do with you. Everything is your fault. Then they beg you back. They are hypersensitive about themselves but totally insensitive to others. They don't want to be alone. Intense short lived relationships mark their lives. Falling in love at first sight. Friends, family and loved ones feel they need to walk on glass . Communication is difficult. The meds make it easier and help them control the impulses and mood swings somewhat. But you still walk on glass. Someone mentioned jeckyl and Hyde- that would best describe my experience. Someone mentioned truth being stranger than fiction- that's the truth. Putting distance between yourself and this person is the best thing you can do for yourself. There love is very selfish. I didn't want to walk away from this person because of their illness -but believe me you will be replaced quickly and forgotten. never do the same for you- ask the family, the exes, the siblings. Honestly, I have not heard any success stories and feel very relieved and greatful to be out of it. I am back to being the happy, positive person with my self esteem intact!! Instead of never knowing what or who I was going to deal with. Please run -don't walk!!!!!! By the way you may want a copy of "I hate you, don't leave me". Ck the library-Good Luck!!

Joined: 1/21/2008

Msg: 94 (view)

Talking to someone who seems overly comfortable with you....BEFORE even meeting Posted: 9/12/2008 1:23:18 PM
It's just a date sweety. If you go into it with "No Expectations" other than you've enjoyed your conversations and now you plan on having a pleasant time you'll be fine. It's your expectations that lead to disappointment. You may not be attracted to him! . If he isn't attracted to you...next! There will be someone that thinks you are the greatest. please- Don't take it so personally! I agree that your gut is trying to tell you something... My feeling is that he MAY be setting you up discussing a "possible relationship", sort of a carrot- Don't bite!! LOL!Players do that. By acting like you have something going he makes you feel comfortable...and draws you in. My way of handling it is a gentle positive reminder to myself and him..."I know we are going to have fun meeting even if there aren't any sparks."

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