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why internet dating is unfair for men
Posted: 2/20/2008 5:08:10 PM | Fiddling around with search, it looks like the ratio's around 2 to 1 man to woman -- bad but not hopeless.
I don't carpet bomb email, myself. If you're doing that, you have to ask yourself what you're really trying to accomplish. Besides which, that's one of the things that women complain about, so it potentially makes the ratio worse, you guys who are doing this.
I doubt it's only hot guys and supermodels getting dates. That seems unduly pessimistic. Maybe people in this thread just need to take a little rest to let your self esteems build back up again.
And you can't fault people for their choices in dates. It's their lives. Personally, I really really really don't want some woman picking me as someone she can have after giving up on what she wants. How insulting would that be? It reminds me of a time I was unconvincingly bragging about how few responses I was getting and a friend sent me this: http://www.gk2gk.com/topten/waystotell.asp (so I'm a geek then, thanks friend). This is a good thing? Maybe I get someone thinking something like, "you know I was looking for someone really exciting, passionate, creative, and cute, maybe a writer type, but it's too hard. These guys are knocking the stuffing out of me. **** it, I'm just going to pick out one of those 10,000 computer programmers on eHarmony. At least he won't screw around on me." Woohoo. Where do I sign up.
No, things are fine how they are. You just need patience and ways of thinking about things to help you wait it out without getting bitter or defensive. And consider this. It's possible that there are people who get a lot of emails and lots of dates from these sites, but because they're generally appealing, someone everyone wants to go out with, they're seeing a lot of people they don't actually have that much in common with, no filters having been invoked, and trading time alone for meaningless encounters with strangers. I don't know about you, but I have other things I like to do. | | | |
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