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Thread: Dating someone with post traumatic stress disorder

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 14 (view)

Dating someone with post traumatic stress disorder Posted: 6/29/2008 8:43:00 PM
One does not over come PTSD utter bs the key is they must not only want to, but do the work

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 136 (view)

The Canadian Government to apologise the Native Peoples for Residencial schooling today. It's about Posted: 6/28/2008 5:07:58 PM
hey rig one answer and i dont care what people think re:bought with the taxpayers money? and funding has to stop You're rents long overdue! And no where in any treaty did Canada's First Nations Surrender, as with the ones in the states. Therefore, that is why .

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 594 (view)

If someone emails you with misspelled words and bad grammar, do you respond? Posted: 6/28/2008 4:58:46 PM
oh gve me a break, thats just so nit picky, who the hell cares i mispell all the time. and this isn't school. geez. what a crock of dung. surley theres more pressing things to worry about. and hey, besides what about someone with learning disabilities - i dont see a spell check on here for them, do you??? And if they have one and thats why their spelling or grammer is off or awful, and you'd also hold that against them - thats worse than shallow. or hey, not everyone is keyboard proficient, what about someone who only types one handed or one finger and/or cant type with out looking at the board etc etc., lots of people, thers bound to be spelling mistakes. and if you think spelling and grammer indicates intelligence or lack of, you're way off. Bottom line, theres many reasons for terrible spelling and grammer, even laziness, to lazy or rushed to re-read and proof read. doesnt matter, if it gets your knickers in a tiwist, you've got issues.

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 118 (view)

What adds flavor to Chicken & Rice? Posted: 6/26/2008 3:32:10 PM
i also sometimes use a mild to medium curry and believe or not a thin coating of greek salad dressing just before taking the chicken out to serve

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 105 (view)

What adds flavor to Chicken & Rice? Posted: 6/24/2008 3:33:51 PM
i like using tomato, basil, garlic and dried crushed chillies with chicken and rice

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 234 (view)

Feel that there is no reason for me to live Posted: 6/19/2008 7:21:14 AM
"My wife left me in 2005 and I feel there is no meaning left in my life. I have tried meeting people on lavalife. I have tried this site but all anyone looks at is what you look like. Christ I've been on these sites for 2 years and havent met one person. I went out with 2 on lavalife and after they met me ran away screaming." Man, please listen i mean read and think. You're not alone. Been there, am there. I'm assuming, you haven't completely let go. Let it go. Not only for your own peace of mind, but hey lets look at it in a spiritual christian context as well, let it go, because sometimes whats gone or lost is nothing compared to what God's ushering in. But if you havent let it completely go, you're blocking whats to come. As for been there, man look, i was engaged and in a long-term commonlaw marriage, 6 yrs. I loved her dearly, I stayed when I shouldn't have. I had to deal with a step daughter who would berbally and physically assault her mom, manipulate and lie and phone police making allagations we wouldn't feed her etc (then the police would come and find out she only made the claim because she didnt want what her mother cooked). Shed run to her biological dad and former step father, her mom had been married 3x before the age of 35! Her mother barricaded herself in the bathroom with a knife threatning to cut her wrists, she hit me 3x, she'd rant and rave at me when programs for her daughter wouldny work, shed plead for help which i poured out to her and went to the wall for her and her daughter and she'd reject the very help, guidance and suggestions not only I, but professionals would give her. after 4 yrs together it started dissolving to a point i couldnt deal with either of them anymore. I made a mistake, nevermind the first one which was I should have left at the start and let it go, the other mistake was, in that forurth year I shut down and shut off the emotional support i used to give. I was mentally drained. We fought and argued and when she'd complain, i'd say the leave, get out theres the F'in door because we later moved from her house in london to mine on the lake. But, i never really wanted her to go, it was frustration. I just wanted it to stop and iot wasnt going to. By the sixth year, she ran off with a guy from the community who is not convicted but known to police for watching young girls with binocs at the beach, stalked one of his former ex's, assaulted another one of his exs, lost his licence for numerous drunk driving offences and is and on again offf again drug user. He's also the kind of predator that hones in on emotional women, does the: Oh i care, i'll be your friend thing, then drops a sob story on them, gets them kooked and runs off with them. All his relationships came via that route. So my ex fell for it, ran off with him, lied to my family who loved her dearly, lied to me. When i found out and confronted her on it, she and tat guy hurled all kinds of false accusations and the whole thing turned nasty. Man did I hurt, you're f'n right. But i let it go. Why, for my own sake, 2) afterr all i gave and did for her, if she was that week minded and that low - she wasnt worth suffering over, 3, so i could move on. Pain, betrayal, lost sense of purpose worth and value, you bet. Even more feelings we could go into. It tore me apart man. Dont give in to thse emotions, if you do, you're giving your ex and others the power over you. You're living in the shadows of once was, thats a road tto knowwhere and pain. Greive it, allow yourself to greive, to feel pain, anger etc. Everyone goes at their own pace. Ya i took the time to grieve so i could finish it and move on. Ya i'm on here, no its not going to great, but i do have some regualrs i talk to as friends. Take your time and when the work is done, someone whos going to turn your world upside down and bring life back into your face will come. Dont push it, dont expected so fast. And as for purpose and reason to live, hell you're still here so you are a survivor and you do have a purpose, but thats for you to discover and live it out. I'm sorry to be so long, but heres an example of how things can turn, through all my situation add the fact i have some learning disabilities, i went to university as a mature student, graduate cum laude high honours and have my degree in clinical social work and am registered to practice and have just finished a psychology degree. When you let go my friend, truly let go, you'll be amazed at how high you can fly and what we truly can become. So i hope in some way, you'll find the courage and strength to fight back, to rise again and fly like never before. Take care and be well, all the best to you.

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 32 (view)

Wife has a friend - help :-( Posted: 6/18/2008 7:08:05 AM
i think the most damning sign is the sneaking around and attempts to hide it, i'm sorry, but those are not good signs. They imply guilt and wrong.

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 74 (view)

The Canadian Government to apologise the Native Peoples for Residencial schooling today. It's about Posted: 6/16/2008 10:43:21 AM
oops, research paper turned into book sorry

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 73 (view)

The Canadian Government to apologise the Native Peoples for Residencial schooling today. It's about Posted: 6/16/2008 10:42:45 AM
Elfwitch, great point look for a reseh paper turned into book by Sylvia Van Kirk. It describes how the scottish were used like slaves during the fur trade and how many scottish trappers and hunters intermarried with First Nations/natives but in the end, were forced to take their children and spouses back to Scotland and elsewhere as the colonistis/government at the time didn't want them here.

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 61 (view)

What do you think of the Tomato Ban ? Posted: 6/15/2008 8:34:52 AM
kinda pasty, saucy and sticky situation isn't it!

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 16 (view)

People that are completely obsessed with looks Posted: 6/15/2008 8:31:53 AM
obsession sorry

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 15 (view)

People that are completely obsessed with looks Posted: 6/15/2008 8:31:09 AM
I'm not fence sitting by any means, jusy my own deduction: while i certainly don't think every woman or man is shallow, i do think we each have our own mindset on what we like and want. But as for physical obession, i don't deny its become too much, but if you look at it, its a sign of the times: look at commercials, movies, tv serious, magazine adds, billboards etc., looks are impressed upon us from everyside, i think unfortunately its becoming engrained into the culture/society. Certainly doesnt make it right. I do think however if one constantly seeks/prefers appearance, one could be overlooking that faithful, decent committed person. And if we base it all on looks, how important is that really? Men, our prostates go, our hair goes, our bellies start looking like buddah women, breasts sag, stretch marks, pounds on the hips. we all get grey hair and wrinkle - so really how important is it? maybe something we all need to ask ourselves but then again, do we want to face it lol

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 13 (view)

Talk about marraige on the 1st date or after a year? Posted: 6/15/2008 8:24:52 AM
well first date obviously too fast too soon to be so personal, i guess however if two really click and hang on each others words it could come up. I'd probably wait, maybe not a year, but to guage where the other one's at, i'd make lil coments or opinions on it after about a 6 month period, but i'd probably wait about a year before proposing or seriously forcing the topic unless she brought it up

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 41 (view)

People facing starvation Posted: 6/15/2008 8:21:33 AM
You'd think with all the advancement in technology and science, this just should not happen, i know at one place where I worked, one of our mottos was that no one should go hungry

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 37 (view)

The Apology Posted: 6/13/2008 11:57:42 AM
free education ah wrong, gong, thats an assumption hmm, i wonder why i have a 60 000 student loan debt load just another example of someone who doesnt have all their facts

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

The Canadian Government to apologise the Native Peoples for Residencial schooling today. It's about Posted: 6/12/2008 7:37:23 AM
please excuse the lengthly post, it all just came to me as i began typing my reply

Quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

The Canadian Government to apologise the Native Peoples for Residencial schooling today. It's about Posted: 6/12/2008 7:35:54 AM
Miigwech, thank you As an Ojibwa First Nations Canadian (annishinabae), I have read your posts and I am both thankfull for your comments, but I'm also hopeful for our future when I see such understanding and tolerance overcoming ignorance. And as I male I take no shame in admitting I cried yesterday. i taped the whole thing, and the biggest moment for me was our leader for the first time! and way too long over do, taking their rightful place in the House of Commons and allowed to speak. It never happened before and hopefully one day, we will have seats in the house. And for those who are on the otherside , i'll share with you in one area of agreement, it is up to our people to change things and turn it around , we are trying. We are getting educated, training our own. However if you read the posts on abuse in these forum, you will see how long stemming and long-term the damage is. It will not be overnight to reverse the alcoholism, drugs, and abuse within our familes and communities, and it is not impossible; but will take time. We are a proud culture and we are resilient as our pressence testifies. There will always be those who don't want to try and stay stuck, this happens across all cultures and groups, but for those of us who want to change, can change, have changed and healed; the doors to a wonderful new sense and bond of nationhood will happen. And for those who think you've pain enough in taxes etc, consider how many vets are First Nations, study our war history, find out how many were decorated, find out how they fought for Canada in spite of the treatment and learn what the commanders though of us, and even though we were exempy from conscription/draft, research how we enlisted in droves. I think what we have in the way of treaty rights was certainly bought and paid for by our women, children, and our veterans. And though the schools closed the one thing that is not mentioned are the group homes that ran right up to the 80s where the same things happened and I was there. But I chose to fight, to heal, I am a professional now, a clinical social worker, registered and also have psychology degree. Great things are possible and its time the rhetoric ends and partnership action really begins. Its a great day however, to be Canadian

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 233 (view)

Why are we here Saturday night? am here and out Posted: 6/1/2008 4:42:02 AM
um, i'll get back to ya if this rigormortis isn't permanent

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 122 (view)

What is clingy? Posted: 5/31/2008 3:26:21 PM
in the most seriouscontext, clingy is like one of those most irratating terds, that no matter how many times you flush it, it keeps coming back in a lesser extent, annoying, like one of those fly strips over your table

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 36 (view)

Are you a pack or a soliatary creature? Posted: 5/31/2008 1:58:25 PM
I'm solitary, very. i dont like busy places and crowds and tend to enjoy private time : but doing as others do, fishing, movies, music, reading, relaxing around the house, walking in the woods, swimming in the lake/beach, running my hound, teasing my cats. I also enjoy dining out, going to the mall, or visiting, especially on a slow day or weekend.

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 31 (view)

My son is on drugs....... Posted: 5/30/2008 9:48:25 AM
the rehab and scare him straight people (who most likely never did any drugs, so really shouldn't be talking) arg, wrong , gong most treatment centres and rehab are being run by former addicts most scared straight people did heavy jail or pen time sorry Darren you're off base man

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 28 (view)

My son is on drugs....... Posted: 5/30/2008 9:28:28 AM
i'll message you, and maybe we can have a talk

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 66 (view)

Alone not even1 reply back..... Posted: 5/30/2008 6:13:00 AM
um, i was being sarcastic and trying to be silly, lifes too short yall

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 59 (view)

Alone not even1 reply back..... Posted: 5/30/2008 5:11:52 AM
My pics are most likely why i do not get messages!, but oh well, hey i'm alive and i keep on keepin on I'm not the sharpest pencil in the box, i'm not the most sparkly alluring gold under the glass, but hell, hey, put me in coach, i'm ready! LOL Dont let it get ya down, you never know, who, when, where or how. Nevermind the why, its just another head ache Be yourself, don't quit, and let the real you show, i'm sure one day you might just have somethin different to post

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 54 (view)

What would you do in this situation? Posted: 5/30/2008 4:49:11 AM
Hmm, run Forest run!

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 38 (view)

What is it about disability? Posted: 5/30/2008 3:44:39 AM
"In our society, people with disabilities are marginalized and presented as less than complete people" thats true, and the many forms of stigma and connotations attached And theres alo as stated , just plain ignorance. But there are wonderful success stories, i know one personally, the daughter of a well known area business person married a guy with, i think MS.

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 110 (view)

5 year age gap !!!! loads of feedback please !!!! Posted: 5/29/2008 6:31:34 PM
LMAO, grandfather gong!

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 109 (view)

5 year age gap !!!! loads of feedback please !!!! Posted: 5/29/2008 6:30:39 PM
"My sis in law was 12 years older tham my bro, they were happily married for 13 years." certainly I know my grandmother was i belive 13 yrs older than my grandmother. i'm not sure at waht age variance it can really become an issue, all i know is if both are mature, know what they want, are attracted to each other, love each other; all the power to ya. personally though if its something like 50 yrs with 20, or 60/30 etc, um, sorry, no thanks!

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 2555 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 5/29/2008 6:26:35 PM
Lots of great moms (or single parents for that matter) I've said before, guys, if you are interested in her and she has children, its a package deal And the kids (safety and welfare) come first as it should be, thats just the way it goes. Not only have i been involved with someone who had children, i'm thankful for the experience even though it may not have worked out, i believe it helps prepare you for the time one might become a dad. So no, i dont bother wondering why.

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 42 (view)

He Says He loves me!! SOS Posted: 5/29/2008 6:20:47 PM
oops sorry, not ready i meant read=typo

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 41 (view)

He Says He loves me!! SOS Posted: 5/29/2008 6:19:41 PM
"He doesn't love you. He loves some idea he has in his head of you. Until you meet in person. All this is an illusion. So be careful of those who profess their love this soon." exactly could be a host of things: a scam, possible deviant, could be truly a really hurting guy but not read and unresolved greif and reaching out and grasping any attention mistaken as love, looking/hoping for a rescuer? Becareful, too many people getting hurt these days, if you sense something wrong, step back, watch, if he gets demanding, sounding paranoid, or talking about his life being over, etc; cut it all off for your own sake

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 16 (view)

How to cook chinese food like a chinese restaurant Posted: 5/29/2008 11:01:46 AM
one of my favs at home i coppied from a restaraunt, Singapore noodles its stir fry veggies with pork, chicken and jumbo shrimps in a curry and ginger sauce/spice over a bed of those ramen or other oriental noodles, usually 3 or 4 packages for a lil more zip, sprinkle crushed chillies or buy vietnemese chillis - really small greenish coloured peppers but very hot

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 15 (view)

How to cook chinese food like a chinese restaurant Posted: 5/29/2008 10:55:29 AM
I'll let ya in on a few: the basic wok is preferred because of its design and depth, but you can get away with using stir-fry fry pans use peanut oil, its expensive, but not only adds flavor, texture and colour. many of the spices you'll need are salt, pepper, chillis, curry, ginger , onion and garlic also, nuts, cashews, almonds etc a big secret, is starch, remember yan can the show, his wonder powder, its corn starch. and many of the flavorings/sauces are now available in any grocery, black bean sauce eg. sugar, even brown sugar instead of buying sweet n sour, you can kake your own with vinegar, brown sugar and pineapple juice, soy sauce you'll be looking for the combination: oil, heat, spice. you can get away with using olive oil, but it heats quick so if using it, cook on low, let it preheat, but once you put your food in, stay right there and monitor because of its tendency to heat fast you'll burn your food if not careful another tip, basic rice, steam it rather than boil it.with all these in mind, just look up your fav recipe and follow as close as possible shrimp tip, cook last, do your veggies and other meats first, over cooked shrimp goes rubbery, so add it last

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 111 (view)

is it wrong to surf profiles? Posted: 5/29/2008 5:53:48 AM
if your seriously dating/commited, hmm but if you're a member and actively single, why not, besides why have profiles in the first place if you can't/shouldn't surf there are some things i guess, just aren't worth being bothered over

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 12 (view)

Can things really work out? Posted: 5/28/2008 9:16:48 PM
Hi Angel re:that I should probably let go/move on etc. etc. but my heart doesn't let me. I feel so bonded and so comfortable with this man I don't think I would ever feel the way I feel about him ever again with anyone else. Like so natural, and so right. I feel so torn between my mind vs. my heart I thought seeing him he'd be an A$$ to me and it would get easier, but he wasn't and it got harder. I just feel like crawling into a hole and staying there because it feels like what I want I will never have and it's awful. Okay, this is common and normal, its okay. Its grief and yes, it sucks. it'll play on many things, especially anything symbolic of times together. It may be a cliche, but its true, Time. And you're doing the right thing as far as not running into anything else. What I would say though, is becareful, don't fall into pining and hoping beyond reason and only hurting yourself and prolonging the greif and pain. Then to find out during all that time what you've missed out on or robbed yourself of. Sure we all expereince and express things differently, but what is the same is the hurtin we can put on ourselves and building it up with expectations. And, sometimes, the only way out is through. You're the one who has to decide what you will do and when. I know that may seem too much at times, and until everythings clear and you take a path, lean on those you can trust, be true to yourself, and most of all, respect and strengthen yourself. I wish you the best and hope it all works itself out, but again, take care of you.

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 267 (view)

Would you date someone on antidepressants? Posted: 5/28/2008 6:19:31 PM
If they are responsible and taking care of themselves, i'd consider it. Besides, everyone has hard times, some people battle and have it rough; then theres those who stew in it and want to be rescued. So for me, i'd take my time and be careful and if it looked like that person truly tries and is working on themselves, why not. My overall suggestion woud just be, careful. My ex was on combined anti-anxiety/depressant, i loved her, it went 6 years. And being on meds had nothing to do with how we ended. I'm not saying this would be the case however for everyone.

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 3 (view)

UFO Crash Posted: 5/28/2008 5:54:04 PM
did lil green men with pigtails jump out?

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 61 (view)

False Teeth ........ Posted: 5/28/2008 5:11:11 PM
Hey, no worries, could be worse, what if they were wood. Or what if he was using chicklets in place of dentures! lol They'd get all soft and oogie after a while

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 92 (view)

are women willing to look past a mans flawed teeth. Posted: 5/28/2008 5:04:48 PM
Hey, i'm just glad i still have em!

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 2499 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 5/27/2008 8:12:39 PM
not all of us are like that

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 224 (view)

Dumped because my children are of mixed racial heritage Posted: 5/27/2008 10:39:55 AM
re: Dumped because my children are of mixed racial heritage I couldn't care what heritage someone's children are; if you truly have feelings for someone and respect them, and accept that their children are all part of the deal, thats that. And on a personal note, anyone rejecting another because of their children's racial heritage isn't worth it in the first place, but again, thats just me.

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 3 (view)

LONDON ~ Meet & Greet ~ Wit's End ~ May 28 Posted: 5/27/2008 6:49:43 AM
Darn, i wont be able to make, when i lived there, we used to go there. The memories re no prob (we meaning ex). We once had a great conversation with the owner, he was a pipe smoking lawyer. We also met the owner of Joe Kools who frequented it. Is it still the same, geared to the more mature and adult crowd, friendly and not so much a young and rowdy place?

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 68 (view)

When someone tells you , you look young Posted: 5/27/2008 6:47:02 AM
well i'd definitely take it as a compliment and relish in it for a bit

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 22 (view)

What is the biggest flaw you would overlook while dating? Posted: 5/26/2008 5:25:47 PM
that reminds me, I need to put Mac Davis on and turn up the stereo

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 158 (view)

Women are (understandably) out for the best lookers too Posted: 5/26/2008 5:51:01 AM
I have to say not all women are. I don't consider myself a looker or hunk by anymeans, but my friend ( a girl ) once wrote a book and i was in it and she described my heart and personality as ethereal qualities. Also my last significant relationship, she was a very beautiful blonde with blue eyes and very smart a book keeper/accountant. So, i can certainly say that not all women are looking for the best lookers. There are many who know what they want and for a variety of reasons and experiences, but yes, there are those who have there heart, mind and desire set on physical. But lets not paint everyone the same.

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 42 (view)

i dont understand women sometimes Posted: 5/26/2008 5:46:16 AM
you also have to remember, women think a different way and they look at much more than what a man sees or is focus on. And we're all different. I think the worrst thing to do ever, is to try and figure everyone out. But as you get to know someone, often, the more you can understand them. But you can never know fully whats going on inside someone. That is unless they share it with you.

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 70 (view)

Men over 30, unmarried no children Posted: 5/26/2008 5:43:10 AM
exactly, i made poor choices, and the best thing one can do, male or female, is learn from it, change what got you there, and move on

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 66 (view)

Men over 30, unmarried no children Posted: 5/25/2008 1:39:10 PM
something wrong.. yumping yimminies, holy crap! No one goes through life unscaved, things sh.t happens, we get hurt , fall down, we can lay there moaning and crying, or get up, dust ourselves off and live again. There can be litterally millions of reasons why, such as myself over 30 and unmarried. Hey, i made two mistakes, jumped too soon into a relationship without working at it, building it and she ran back to her ex husband. Second time around was hell, we both started out well, were in love but all hell broke loose her daughter had significant mental health and drug addiction problems and became increasingly violent and walked out, hit the streets, then started dealing and moved in with an older guy, her mother was a nervous wreck, suffering depression, under a psychiatrists care, then her mother died, she also been married and divorced 3 times before she was 36yrs old (yes i saw it, thought maybe a red flag, but wanted to give her the benefit of a doubt because you never know) and awhole lot more going on. Bottom line after 6yrs, 2 great, 2 good/okay, the last two were a disaster, both of us went from loving to arguing all the time, blaming, it spiraled and then that it was over. I took time to greive, in some sense i was relieved, but i loved her and her daughter and went to the wall for them. So now, i'm taking it very slow and cautiously because i dont want the same thing again, and never will i jump into something like a redi-made family again. That doesnt mean i look upon every woman with suspicion, i want what many of them want, something without the nonesense, the crap, the dishonesty, someone committed who doesnt cut and run when things get bad because things do, its life. So anyway, thats just where i'm at. no big deal, if i meet her and it happens, and its good and it right, then great. if not, i just carry on and do what i have to do. life.

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 13 (view)

Why do women complain when their husbands are away from home too much because they are AT WORK? Posted: 5/25/2008 1:25:50 PM
ah huh exactly!

quintas

Joined: 3/11/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

Why do women complain when their husbands are away from home too much because they are AT WORK? Posted: 5/25/2008 1:23:16 PM
theres a whole host of reasons, and some very valid and significant. I'm answering in terms if excessive time away: 1) your spouse and you although still having self and autonomy are also joined as one. You're there not only to bring in some money and help, your spouse has needs to. You can work like a dog to buy a bif home, extravagant things and so on, but if you're away 90% of the time, your spouses and children's needs are not being met. 2) children, you helped create them, you help raise them. They need you as much as they need the other. when away too long it also leaves the one who is home more often, the nurturer and discipliner - not fair to that spouse. Its actually negelcting your partners and family's needs. 3) when away so often how is he/she supposed to get time in for themselves - visiting friends, hobbies, relatives, personal time enjoying a book, a movie, whatever they fancy. there's many other easons as well, but these are toppers. Now, if we're just talking over time every now and then or on-call but its not consistent, i don't see a problem, but in excess, I'd have to take her side.

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