A question for the female chat & forums.

Posted In Forum:

Home

MyForums

Show ALL Forums

Author

Thread: A question for the female

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 29 (view)

A question for the female Posted: 9/19/2005 6:27:32 AM
yeah...i guess i'm one of a kind...hehe...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 7 (view)

A question for the female Posted: 9/17/2005 8:15:26 PM
ummmm....maybe it's just me...or maybe it's just b/c i haven't found someone to do it right...but i actually prefer if they don't do it at all...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 43 (view)

At what point does it just become gross? Posted: 9/17/2005 7:45:55 PM
wow......lmao......uhhhh......i'm speechless....uhhhhh......yeah....i can't reply to this.....lmao....

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 80 (view)

How many times a day can you handle havin sex??!!! Posted: 9/17/2005 7:41:55 PM
lol...that's funny...how many times a day could i possibly handle having sex?!? hmmm let's see...well i don't think i would ever stop having sex if i had the choice...hehe...days would turn into months...months into years...years into lifetimes....i would have sex every second of every day if i could...that's how much i could handle...hehe

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 2 (view)

my son does not want to talk to or see his mom! Posted: 9/13/2005 11:58:30 AM
well unfortunately if your joint custody is through the courts...you really have no choice in the matter on whether he should see his mom or not...and he really doesn't either...you could honestly be held in contempt if you don't let his mom see him...you can change this though... if it is through the court...you can have your son explain to the judge on what his feelings are...in the end it is still up to the judge what he believes is best...he might change visitation he might not.... i'm kinda going what you're going through...my daughter is almost 3...and throws a fit everytime i even mention that she's going to see her dad...and i absolutely hate the fact that i drop her off there sometimes...but i feel that she is still really young...and i really want her to get to know him...i do try to talk to her father and let him know what's going on...and how she feels...and we try to discuss ways to fix this problem...b/c lord knows...i don't want her hating her father for whatever reason... my advice for now...is to try and find out what feelings your son has about his mom...where the feelings are coming from...i might even possibly look into some counseling if possible...there might be things on his mind that's affecting him more than you think... there might be some held up resentment towards his mom for some reason...just try to get to the bottom of this...and discuss this all with his mom...once you figure out what the problem is... then you will be able to start to fix it...until then...you're just going to be confused...with a problem comes a solution...don't forget that...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

Whose job is it? Posted: 9/13/2005 11:46:49 AM
well it's kinda funny...but who gave the father choices...i mean it seems to me that the women who have to take care of the kids are left with no choices about anything dealing with their kids...but yet the fathers actually believe that they have choices...about when they see them...when they talk to them...their responsibilities...so on and so forth...if i were you...i wouldn't contact him...if he chooses not to call..then he chooses not to know about his son...it's not your job to figure out how involved his father wants to be...he believes he can have a choice with this...so let him choose...my daughter's father is now choosing not to see his little girl...well fine...if that's the case...so be it...maybe she's better off...and maybe your son is too...i mean what kind of person would you like your son to get to know? if i were you...i would just let things go their route...if the father stays out of the way...maybe it's the best for everyone that he does that...don't try to force things upon him...no matter what you do...it won't change anything...so yeah....just be the best mom that you can be...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

How to be proactive with difficult ex (regarding kids)? Posted: 9/10/2005 10:35:08 AM
well it is true how sometimes you have to kiss the ex's ass in order to see your kid... i never tried to do that to my daughter's father...i am planning on moving to colorado...which is half way across the country from where i live now...the only thing that is kinda stopping me is the fact that her father is here....anyways...it kinda sounds as if your court system is pretty messed up...i know that over here if your wife would've done that they would've found her, took her to court, and lock her up for disobeying a court order...i'm sure there has to be a way were you can arrange visitation with your son without having to kiss your ex's ass... maybe you might even try to get custody of him...if that's what you would want to do.... no matter what you're gonna have to spend some money...it's hard i know...but just think... how much money is your son worth? if there is no amount...then money shouldn't be a problem... you'll find it somehow...even if it takes a while...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 19 (view)

Do you think guys or girls have more emotional baggage? Posted: 9/9/2005 5:04:03 PM
well we all have our baggage...but most people would say women do b/c of the fact that we're more open about our feelings...and well men just tend to stay away from showing feelings..well "too much" feelings anyways...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 85 (view)

Would you date a pregnant woman? Posted: 9/9/2005 12:57:01 PM
well i know one thing for sure...no matter how cute you are...it's a lot harder to find someone to be with the further along you are...when i was just a couple months pregnant...i found someone...he only stuck around for just a couple months...then i took a break...when i was ready to date again...i was also ready to "pop"....and i couldn't find anyone...i still can't...but i DID just have my son a week ago...lol

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 40 (view)

Quite interested...hehe Posted: 9/4/2005 8:20:25 PM
well just to let everyone knows that cares to hear...i had my son friday sept. 2nd... and he's the most gorgeous thing i have ever seen in my life...having him reassures me what my duties in life are...and they are my kids...yes i am still interested in meeting that special someone... but my kids are number one...always have been...always will be...even when they are grown and out of the house....

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 19 (view)

Disabilities...(and the misconceptions)...what's yours? Posted: 9/4/2005 8:17:41 PM
boy i can relate to quite a lot of you...yeah...a lot of these "disabilities" you couldn't get paid for...but doesn't mean that they don't stop you from doing day to day things...or it doesn't mean they don't affect relationships in your life...i've lost a lot of people i cared about because of the way i was...and it's really hard to actually look at yourself and identify what is wrong...it's even harder to try to do something about it...but i am a strong believer that you have a choice to let these things cripple you or not...these things may tend to affect my life...but i choose not to let them control my life...get what i'm saying? hopefully one day i can leave some of these disabilities behind me...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

Compatiblity by Sign Posted: 8/31/2005 8:46:21 PM
i'm not sure about other signs...but i sure know that two sagittarius' and a sag and capricorn just don't work out...lol...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

Forceful Silver Screen-type kisses. Women - Yes/No? Posted: 8/31/2005 11:56:08 AM
well my ex-boyfriend had told me that one time i was at his house (when we were friends)...that he had a sudden urge to grab me, throw me up against the wall, and just go crazy...my thoughts...WHY DIDN'T YOU!!! i've never had a guy actually do that...and i think... depending on the circumstances...it would be the best thing in the world...so i would have to go with option A...hehe...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 38 (view)

Quite interested...hehe Posted: 8/31/2005 11:28:32 AM
well thank you psychman...i tend to be happy filling my life with my family members... they support me...give me good advice...i've learned a lot from them b/c they have been through tough times...the times when i do try to feel sorry for myself...my family won't let me...they make me take a reality check and realize what's going on...and so instead of feeling sorry for what happened...i figure out how to get passed it as a better person...they have helped me sooo much....and it also helped me become a better person having them around, not shuting me out of their lives because i decided to make a few bad decisions...they were there when i was a drug addict...they were there when i was homeless numerous times...but they weren't there to feel sorry for me...they were there to slap me in the face and say WAKE UP!!!...i've learned not to feel as a victim...in any circumstances...now...i just couldn't let myself feel as if i am a victim...it never really crosses my mind anymore...i just automatically think...ok...this is gone wrong...well why? ok...once i figure that out....then i'm like....ok...what do i need to do to better the situation...and how will i learn from this...what will i take out of this that i can use in life...and honestly...i love living life that way much better than being a victim... i feel proud of myself when i accomplish things on my own...when i figure it out on my own... and when i learn and become a wiser, more understanding person because of it...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 24 (view)

I lost her because I love my daughter so much Posted: 8/30/2005 9:49:26 PM
miguel...honestly you should have included your g/f with all the decisions you were making or about to make...if you would have...then whatever your ex would have said to her would have been put on the back burner...as for the marriage part...don't PLEASE don't listen to blast on this one...i can understand how some people are just not ready to settle down that way...yes things happen...people have kids...we can't really judge you on your decision to not get married because we honestly don't know how your relationship was at the time...when i was with my daughter's father, after we had our daughter...we still were not ready for a marriage relationship...which we honestly thought we were at the time our daughter was inside me...but after long talks and figuring stuff out...it was just something we really didn't want to jump into...and thank god we didn't b/c then i would have a divorce on my record...not something i would be proud of...and i would honestly disregard everything blast has said...she apparently is perfect in everyway...and never had to deal with situations as this...so just blink when you come across her comment...lol...anyways...i don't feel you are a bad father...i think it was wrong of her to leave to mexico with your child... she has no idea how lucky she is for having chose a man who would want to stick by her child's side... it was completely selfish of her to up and leave like that just because you guys couldn't work things out...apparently she wasn't thinking about the well being of her child...i applaud you in your efforts to seeing your daughter...she is a lucky girl...but as for the relationship part... that was kinda crappy not telling her up front...and it does sound like to me that she really does not want to listen to what you have to say...it is very possible that she just left you in the past and has moved on...all i would worry about now is your daughter....i know it will get lonely not having a special someone around...but things happen...you will find someone else... and when you do...the best thing you can do is to learn from your mistakes and make sure to do right by her and right by your daughter...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

Good friends with ex Posted: 8/30/2005 9:21:41 PM
yeah there is a lot of people who have problems with that...but i'm friends with my ex...we know we would never work it out again...but we always did make better friends than anything else...so it's all good...i wouldn't though put his needs before anyone else's though... we just have eachother around so that if we need to talk about something...or vent...since we know eachother so well...we can call eachother up and talk about it...and help eachother through it...plus it does help with the fact that we have a daughter together... there still comes some hostility when it comes to her...but we try to work it out and get an understanding going between eachother...so far so good...so i really can't complain...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 35 (view)

Quite interested...hehe Posted: 8/30/2005 8:33:29 PM
well it is quite obvious difficulttone...that you can't read either...d*mn...i never specified when i learned from my mistakes...lol...so how can you say that i didn't...and let's see here... i dont' expect anyone to take care of my children except for me...another thing i also discussed several times in my forum...you people need to read EVERYTHING if you are going to make horrible, stupid, naive comments like this...and i am wondering what bad examples i'm setting for my kids...is it that i'm showing them to never give up no matter what life deals you...to keep going with your head held up high...to appreciate every moment you have.... to better yourself by pursuing your dreams....c'mon...i'm quite interested in knowing how i'm setting bad examples...and i have never acted as a victim...again...another thing i have discussed SEVERAL times in my forum...i have owned up to everything i've done...i will admit all my faults...i know the choices i have made...and i don't see how anyone can see a victim coming from this person...soo...please...do elaborate...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 32 (view)

Quite interested...hehe Posted: 8/30/2005 3:17:33 PM
lol...gypsy..i was wondering when i'd be able to read some more "smart" comments from you...ok...let's see here...let's see what i can come up with...b/c i know everything and all...well one...i'm not "non-religious"...in my profile it says i'm a christian...so yeah...anyways...as i wrote JUST before you commented...which again...you need to learn to comprehend words...but yeah...i had said that i made every effort i could to be with the fathers...but my efforts were looked past....i'm not saying i was an angel...but after my daughter was born...i decided to take a much different path that didn't include drugs or alcohol...or living a "care-free" life...i ended up getting my GED...which was not a good as a diploma...but it was one thing i knew i had to do in order to further my education...but anyways...back to the fathers...i trusted them a little too much to make good decisions i guess...i pretty much expected that when my daughter's father saw her come into this world it would be a wake up call..well it wasn't...and not long after...i left him...despite all i tried to do...i figured it would have been best for my daughter and i to be out of that situation...than to see him drink himself away...day by day...and as for my son's father...he was a really decent guy...he really was...and he honestly never got into any trouble beforehand...why he chose to do something like this? i have yet to figure that out...it came to a shock to me when i was reading what he did in the newspaper...and boy oh boy....i'm glad i wasn't 17 when i had my daughter...i was 20...but someone i guess who could do math probably already knew that didn't you...and as for my daughter's happiness...well all i can say for that is...she's a very intelligent girl...already starting to speak a second language...and she prefers to stay with me all the time than to go anywhere else...no matter whose house it is... so i guess i must be doing something right in that area....and i'm not looking for someone to support my kids...like i said...when i put that in my profile..i honestly didn't think it was going to look that way...and that is why it no longer says that...b/c i can support myself and my two kids just fine...and yes statistics do say that kids who grow up in certain types of homes tend to go a little off the deep end....more so than others...but like i said...i haven't made very good choices...i admit that...but i CHOOSE not to do that anymore...i've learned from my mistakes...as i have said many of times...and i believe i would be a pretty stupid human if i didn't...and i said that my sister learned that from a book b/c that's what she tells us...she even tells us what books she learned it out of...so hmmm...i wonder....and i don't care if someone went to school all of their life studying about psycology...that's why counselors and most of the people i've ever talked to never got along...people are more apt to listening to someone who has been there...done it...and moved on from it being better people...rather than someone who just read it in a book and generalizes them b/c some book told them to do so...it's more of a personal thing when experience is calculated in there...it's kinda funny too how i'm actually going into college to counsel troubled adolescence...or am i a bad person because i know the mistakes i made...and i know how preventable they could be...and i figure i just might be able to help some kids out there who are going on the same route as i did...? i wonder....but i'm not going to mention much about the bible...it's just one thing i know you really need to read up on...especially the whole judgemental part...possibly talk to a pastor or something even...i dunno...that's just something you need to work out on your own i guess...ohhh just ONE MORE THING....it's nice to hear that someone as perfect as you live around here...that i'm actually talking to someone who has never made bad decisions or has done nothing wrong in their life...it's nice to meet you jesus...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 4 (view)

How do we do it? Posted: 8/30/2005 2:10:48 PM
well first things first...you should find someone that is compatible to you and who you believe will make you happy...then you need to make sure that they are compatible with your son...and they also need to have an understanding that your son is part of your life...always will be...and he will always be around...i have met a few guys who liked me a lot..but didn't like the whole kids factor...well too bad for them b/c i'm not going to shove my kids off to the side for anyone...especially a man...it's not gonna be easy though to find someone...it's gonna be a pretty long wait...i'm still waiting...but that just makes more time i can have with my kids so it's really no big deal to me...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 28 (view)

Quite interested...hehe Posted: 8/30/2005 10:46:22 AM
hey chick...am i complaining about the fact that i have to raise these kids? i don't think so... so it was their choice to go to prison...not mine...why should i look like the bad person because of what they decided...i did all i could do to try to make them decent humans in society...but people will only listen so much...my efforts were just looked over...yeah it does not look all that well on me that i ended up with people with poor judgement...but i guess i'm too trusting of a person...i guess i gave too many chances...i guess i saw the good person lingering inside of them....so i have had some bad judgements with them...the funny thing is... is they were spanish men...lol...so i kinda tend to leave them alone for now...knowing what i know now... a lot of them have no respect for our laws...or for women... but look i may have been irresponsible with the fact that i didn't protect myself from having children...but that's not the issue here...i'm not complaining...i'm not whining...i'm not saying a sob story because i'm a single mother...like i said...my kids were gifts...whether i wanted these gifts or not...that's beside the issue...and actually the ONLY way i know i won't get pregnant is if i never have sex...which i'm not too worried about that anytime soon...but yeah...my dad was a condom baby...so nothing is 100%...except abstinence...but yeah...birth control helps...that's why i'm going to seek the best kind out there as soon as my son is born...not just for the fact that i really wouldn't want anymore...but also i want my kids to have a lot of love in their life coming from me...you add too many kids...there will be things that will lack...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 26 (view)

Quite interested...hehe Posted: 8/30/2005 1:05:38 AM
[Either i'm too polite or you guys are too harsh lol This all just looks wrong... WRONG! ] lol..this has just become a pathetic attemt to judge other people...lol...it's too bad that i don't believe in judging someone...so i guess their feeble attempts just look WRONG....lol

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 25 (view)

Quite interested...hehe Posted: 8/30/2005 12:59:30 AM
gypsy, gypsy, gypsy....wow..lovely little book you produced here...but i have to say...you talk about the bible buddy? well read up on it a little bit more...b/c it does state in there that the only one that has the RIGHT TO JUDGE...is GOD ALMIGHTY...that we as humans have so many faults that we cannot judge correctly...as you have proven...and BTW....i was with my daughter's father for 2 1/2 years...i was with my son's father for 2 years...yeah...i BARELY knew them...sure...ok...whatever you say...i just lay down for any joe shmoe...and like i said...yeah they were bad people...but that was their decision...they knew what they were doing...and they are big boys...so they can make decisions on their own...but it's not like i never tried to help...and it's not like they're gonna listen to me anyways...and right now... my daughter's father is actively in her life...he has become a different person from his mistakes..and i'm very proud of that factor...and we are really good friends despite what we have gone through together...i only wish my son's father could've done the same... but he decided to make a decision...and do something he never did before...and well...he just ended up going away...and i don't see my children as mistakes...in all actuality...my daughter saved my life...if God didn't give her to me...i could possibly be dead right now b/c the life i was leading before her...was not actually a good one...it was a very selfish...drug addictive...life... and i don't rely on the tax payers dollars...i rely on myself...b/c honestly...and you should know this with how WISE you are...but in the end...you only HAVE yourself to rely on...besides God of course...and i know you're gonna make a good ol' comment on me talking about Him...but that's ok...God forgives...and i know he forgave me...that's why i choose not to lead the life i did before...that's why i stay to myself most of the time...and to my children...i don't go out...i don't have many friends...and i like it that way...and i'm sorry but you really don't know how life really is...b/c you're too judgemental to look past many things...and it's sad...it honestly is...and i believe if i were trully irresponsible... that would mean i wouldn't learn from my mistakes...that i would keep going the route i took...and i would put my kids on the back burner...hell maybe even give them up...ya know...it's soo much easier now adays for single mothers to give up their kids rather than take care of them...look at the ratio of how many kids are up for adoption...i mean..my daughter's father wanted to take her...but no...i don't think so... i would not have a good reason to wake up every morning if her bright face wasn't there to wake me up...and it will be the same for my son when he finally gets here... i am just baffled at how many people can be soooo judgemental....i wonder what skeletons you have in your closet? and BTW....my parents stayed together...and i became a criminal... a drug user...i dropped out of high school...explain that one??? and...books tell you crap...you learn nothing....well maybe you do...hell my sister...older sister i may add...(and WAS married)...learned that throwing your child in a room for hours b/c you can't handle them was ok...yeah...books...gotta love them...they are JUST like experience...are you for real? and yes it is MY forum...i don't see anyone else's name up there who started this one... hmm..anything else i should comment about?? i dunno...let's just see how you reply to this one...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 23 (view)

Quite interested...hehe Posted: 8/30/2005 12:28:42 AM
[you need to get your shit together for the sake of your kids ] ohh man...almost forgot about you...hmmmm...let's see here...let's take a look at your profile sweetie...hmmm...and let's just see how much you have your sht together to even try to make a jugdement against me...well i see you say nothing about you child...sad...you can't even mention them...what kind of mother are you when you don't even say a single word about your child...anywho...you apparently have no profession...or at least you like to make people you think you don't by not saying anything in that part...and i thought you were a single mother who juggled school and work...but yet you have time to vacation...ahhh must be a rather nice life to lead...how can i believe a word you have said when your profile says nothing about any of it...no school...no job...no kid...hmmm...and how can you possibly verify that i have nothing going on in my life...do you stalk me? living in hawaii...i wouldn't think so... boy oh boy...you people come in here....talking your talk...saying whatever you please...assuming things you couldn't POSSIBLY be sure of... has anyone ever accepted the concept of thinking before you speak??? is this what it boils down to? let's bash this single mother...b/c it makes us feel good...or b/c she's looking for someone to share her life with...to share the joys of her children with...hmmm...it's pretty sad...and ya know...i actually kinda noticed how bad it has become...lol...here's a good example...just the other day...i had to push my car off the road b/c it died in the middle of traffic...now i'm obviously pregnant...but did any nice person want to help a pregnant woman push a 1 ton car off the side of the road?? no...word to the wise people...especially you sinister...don't comment in someone's forum...especially bashing comments...if you can't even back it up...yawn*... makes me quite tired of listening to you all...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 4 (view)

Standards Posted: 8/30/2005 12:11:12 AM
[Too many men pouncing upon women like tigers upon deer. ] lol..that's great...gave me a good laugh...lol...i'm lucky if i get a good decent e-mail from someone every couple of days...i honestly can't say why some women don't reply...maybe ol' dude is right...but as for me...i usually reply to all of them if i'm interested...if not...i try to tell them in a nice way...but as for everyone...it's easier to ignore someone...than to say something that may hurt their feelings...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 60 (view)

Sensitive, compassionate and affectionate men, are we sought after? Posted: 8/29/2005 11:54:15 PM
well of course women want that....it's like a wet dream for them...but honestly...there are just too few out there...in my area anyways...guys around here just like to sit around...drink beer...watch a few races...or ball games...while the woman is outside tuning up her own car... lol...sad but very very true...but we honestly think it is just too good to be true...like we wonder...what could possibly be wrong...there HAS to be something wrong b/c they sound TOO perfect...and that usually scares us away...our own thoughts...and a lot of that has to do with the fact that we have just been hurt so many times by men who act as if they are this way...and then a few months later...SURPRISE...it was a front...i have actually made a lot of men more open with their feelings though... i just have a nack with that...i make them feel as if they can trust me with anything...and i won't use it against them...which they can trust me so don't get the wrong idea...lol..but i think that also has a big affect on why some men are the way they are...that they opened up to the wrong person who used this against them...used it as a weakness...soo...yeah...society in general has things pretty messed up...but to answer your question...yes...there soooo many women who want that...but then again...there are women out there who actually need the "hardened" man..and who see your attributes as a weakness...it just differs from person to person...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 28 (view)

What do I do now ? Posted: 8/29/2005 11:45:52 PM
my sister's father left when she was 2....never showed the slightest interest of getting in touch with her...my father ended up taking on the role of her father...well when she was 15... she wanted to find her father and see him...possibly stay with him..(she was having problems at our house.)..now my mom tried to explain the type of person he was...but she wanted to meet him otherwise...one month of staying at his house...she was beggin to come back...she also found out that later on...he ended up slapping his wife b/c she mentioned her name around him...that's what i call a sperm donor...anywho...back to you...and my advice... i believe that you should at least meet him once...this has been a door that has been opened for you all of your life...the time has come to walk through it...when you meet him...you will possibly find out all the answers you need to know...and then i would make your decision then and there to either keep that door open in your life...or shut it...lock it up...and walk away...for you're own sanity though...i would meet him...it's best to face these things...instead of walking away from them without ever knowing...who knows...something could have happened that prevented him from seeing you...or he could be like my sister's father who just walked away b/c he didn't want you...who knows...the only way you can find these answers and other answers you NEED is to meet up with him...that's the best thing i can advise...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 22 (view)

I really screwed up Posted: 8/29/2005 11:37:37 PM
well...lol..i kinda sorta know how you feel in one aspect of your forum...i've been talking to this one guy for a while who lives halfway across the us from me...we have been planning things out details by details on how we will meet....but one thing is...yes i do have feelings for him...and he has feelings for me...BUT....we both haven't let it go too far with the fact that we still have yet to see how we are together in person...we do have some high expectations on how it will go...but i know we both understand that it could be completely different when we meet...so i think the FIRST thing you did wrong...was let yourself get a little too attached to this guy...i can understand how easy it is...but then again...you do have to stop yourself at times in order to save yourself and your own feelings...i can understand how he feels...i feel that if this guy i'm talking to would tell me about other girls he is with or has been with recently...i would be pretty hurt...and it sounds to me that if this guy actually is upset by the things you have done then it's quite apparent that he accumulated some feelings for you also...the best thing i could possibly suggest in your predicament is this...talk to him for a while longer...maybe set something up...and if you only want him...as of right now...then don't go for anyone else...stay faithful..even if it's an online thing for now...but don't be surprised if nothing happens when you guys meet...i just think you should really meet up....see how that goes...then go from there...honestly...people's word goes so far...it's mostly the actions that speak a bit louder...and i don't think you'll be able to accomplish half of what you want to prove to him online...the best of luck to you though...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

What does being ready for a relationship, REALLY mean, to you? Posted: 8/29/2005 11:25:33 PM
well the only way i can answer this question is to explain how i know i'm ready for a relationship...(little insight first)...i'm a single mother...i have a 2 1/2 year old daughter...and a baby boy on the way...the last relationship i was in was about 6 months ago...i believe i am ready to venture out into the relationship world again b/c....i know my goals in life...i am taking the proper steps to achieving them...i know i will not let anyone stand in my way to accomplishing them either...but i feel with the security of knowing my future...i am more able to secure a relationship...i won't be too worried about how my life is going and what i'm going to do next...i can focus not only my energy on my kids, but also into a relationship...i feel that even though i do have kids...and that will take up a lot of time...that i still have all the time in the world to share my life with someone...i know i can be there if they call and need someone to talk to....and i know i'm not looking for someone for my children either...i am fully capable of raising them alone if need be...i'm looking for someone for me...and honestly...my kids will not meet a guy i choose to date until it actually becomes a serious thing...or close to becoming serious...i just know i wouldn't want to make the mistake of them meeting someone...getting attached...and then something happening and we split...but i know that i am ready to share my heart, my soul, my dreams, my nightmares, my aspirations, my faults, my good deeds, my little imperfections...etc...with someone special...and i'm ready to take in all of their good and bad points too...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 45 (view)

What would you do? Posted: 8/29/2005 11:12:29 PM
ok...first of all...from someone who knows how it is to deal with children alone while working a lot...it does get soo hard at times...there are times i worry so much about my daughter...when i'm gone...right now i'm actually out of work due to the fact that i had some health issues with my pregnancy...plus my daughter...but i couldn't help it...i figured...my kids come first no matter what...and if that costs me my job...so be it...just as long as they are healthy and doing ok...as for your children's mother...i wouldn't let her come back...right now anyways...if she could be so selfish as to leave her kids alone to be with another man b/c he didn't like kids...well then let her selfishness eat her alive...i know i will NEVER leave my kids for a man...they will be in my life, no matter what, till the day i die...and if a man can't accept that...then he just told me how much he honestly cared for me personally...b/c my kids are my life...if she couldn't be that way...then it sounds like she's not all right upstairs... she just might have stepped off the curb with this decision...i honestly would never take her back in a relationship...and for right now...i wouldn't let her spend time with her kids...she needs to seek help...or at least prove to you that she made a bad decision as a mother... until then...i wouldn't put your kids through this...i know it is difficult for them not having a mother around...but with their age...they are very influential right now...and if you just let her come back into their lives without knowing for sure she will stick around 100%...then you can make matters worse...just take some time...seek legal advice...maybe take these matters to court...whatever you do...just don't decide too quickly...b/c you're not just deciding for yourself and her...but for your kids too...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 22 (view)

Quite interested...hehe Posted: 8/29/2005 10:41:42 PM
OHHH OUCH! you're 53 gypsy? man...i am so sorry...i feel sorry for a man like you with the thought process you tend to have...it just shows me what kind of a sad sad world we live in...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 21 (view)

Quite interested...hehe Posted: 8/29/2005 10:39:16 PM
first of all gypsy...you can't read apparently...i don't know how many times i've said that i'm on my S...E....C....O....N....D kid...dmn...LEARN TO READ...lol...freakin hilarious...you try to respond in my forum without even being able to read and comprehend words...go to grammer school if you have to...dmn...and honestly...how is it so bad to have T...W....O...kids (read carefully now gypsy)...that are 3 years apart...hmmm....i would understand if they were i dunno...9 months apart...that people would be so irrate...and yes...i chose wrong people... haven't we all?? if we haven't...then why are the vast majority of us on here S...I...N...G...L...E..it has to be apparent that the ones we chose were not the ones for us... plus i'm not the only one who layed down...and did the dirty deed...and it was not my decision for them to choose they're paths...i chose my path....i'm leading down this path i chose...and i'm currently looking at brighter pastures...and you are wrong when you say you K..N...O...W...what i'm doing and how i am...have you spoken with me...do you watch me in my windows...are you a friend/family member of mine who is around me all the time to see what i'm doing...I DON'T THINK SO...so how could you POSSIBLY "know" me...if you aren't around me...and you don't know what i've been dealt with...i did make the comment earlier in my forum that a lot of it was due to what i chose...but there were a lot of situations that came up...that honestly were not my fault...and honestly..i haven't seen your profile yet...but i figure you just might be at the age of..i dunno...18...19...well you're mental capasity anyways...word to the wise gypsy...don't think too hard on one subject at a time... you might cause internal damage...b/c it's obvious you don't think too well that way...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 8 (view)

Disabilities...(and the misconceptions)...what's yours? Posted: 8/29/2005 9:37:13 PM
wow so far so good...it sometimes gets hard to think of ways that you are disabled... and being disabled is not a bad thing...it's just something that everyone has to deal with...for most it's just from time to time...i can relate to a couple of you who have dyslexia...my mother has that...and there has been several times that i've had to kinda correct her b/c she read the wrong time...or she accidently wrote the grocery list backwards...we often don't think of these things as a disability...but if it affects your life in a rather bad way...and prevents you from doing certain things...then the best way to describe it is a disability... i have another one...one that i just found out...i was told a couple years ago that i was bipolar...of course i didn't listen...figured they were just blowing air out their butts...but the more and more i thought about it lately...the more and more i wondered about it...so i decided to look it up...research it...and it does sound like i could possibly be bipolar...now knowing this...it does explain a few things...and i'm going to talk to my doctor about this... because i believe most disabilities can be fixed...and if you can find a way to fix it...then i'd say go ahead... my advice for you jentle jim...i know where you're coming from...i have had a bad problem with sleeping...or having the lack of desire to do things...just from the way i feel...but then i found out that a lot of where that was coming from was the lack of iron gettin into my system...so i am catagorized as anemic...which is an iron deficiancy...with the lack of iron... comes the lack of strength and desires...it kinda feels like the physical form of depression...but this is something that can easily be fixed...just by getting more iron in your system... i suggest that you should check up with your doctor...get a blood/glucose test done...and they can tell within five min. if you have low iron...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 48 (view)

women... Posted: 8/27/2005 9:17:11 PM
lol...no i think it's more like...GGGGRRRRRROOOOOOOWWWWWLLLLLL...lol

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 46 (view)

women... Posted: 8/27/2005 9:15:05 PM

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 44 (view)

women... Posted: 8/27/2005 9:11:30 PM
maybe b/c that's how he is...but i can tell that you would probably wanna cuddle with a woman who has the hormones of a tiger...lol

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 42 (view)

women... Posted: 8/27/2005 9:08:52 PM
just make sure you can find a woman who can control her hormones...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 7 (view)

people and there word Posted: 8/27/2005 8:41:23 PM
i have learned not to believe what people say but what they do... you can tell me all day that you will do something...but i won't believe you until you do it...i have to see it to believe it...but i have also learned that you can tell when someone is lying just by the look in their eyes...and you can learn a lot about someone in just 5 min of first meeting them...but anyways...people lie...it's human nature...it's sad to think this...but it's true...so you can only believe what a person says so much...it's best to always be weary of talking to someone... i'm always on the look out for liars...and i'm one of those people....i usually trust you right off the bat...but once you break that trust...it's the hardest thing in the world to get it back...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 11 (view)

why me Posted: 8/27/2005 8:03:23 PM
[Wanna talk about all your deepest feelings and emotions with her ? That'll put your****on ice for sure. ] i have to sooo disagree with that statement...i am a woman who has tried to make a guy open up like that...not so i can use that against him...but to show him that it's ok to feel... to show emotions sometimes...i think it is more manly to be that way in some moments than to completely be shut down and out of touch with your feelings... i wouldn't listen a bit to what this dude is saying...if you have confidence...then you will pursue in relationships...but if you harden up and stop being yourself...then you won't find someone who will honestly want to be with you for YOU... you should never change for anyone...unless you feel that it is a bad quality that might help you go even further with the relationship...but if you are happy with who you are...don't change a bit...and don't give up...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 31 (view)

women... Posted: 8/27/2005 7:49:03 PM
lol..this is crazy...it's wild listening to guys complain about women wanting sex...it's actually a bit shocking...probably b/c most guys i've talked to...that's all they wanted...i'll tell ya what...just be yourself...if you can't find no one...then that's a lot better than finding someone who is just playin around and fakin...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 69 (view)

Would you date a pregnant woman? Posted: 8/27/2005 7:40:19 PM
wow....reading some of these...i wonder why no one has really showed interest in me...sheesh...i'm pregnant...hmmm...maybe b/c it's not going to be for long...hmmmm...i honestly...as a pregnant single woman...can understand both sides...why someone would date a pregnant female...and why someone would not...if i was a guy...i would honestly be a bit skepticle about dating a single pregnant woman for the simple fact that there are a lot of women out there who would want a father for their children...me on the other hand...my kids have me and that's all they need...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 22 (view)

women... Posted: 8/27/2005 7:02:31 PM
listen man...i have found that all these guys i end up talking to on here just want to talk about sex...it drives me NUTS! i mean in my profile i say that i want a serious relationship... if i just wanted sex...i would say i wanted an intimate encounter...but anywho...i usually don't talk to them anymore...don't worry...there are plenty of women out there who are genuine and who want a serious relationship...i'm actually surprised to hear that there are a lot of women out there who just want some booty...but hey...i guess it goes both ways now adays...which is kinda crappy for us women who are respectable...it just makes us look kinda bad...well anywho..don't give up...just be more cautious...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 1 (view)

Disabilities...(and the misconceptions)...what's yours? Posted: 8/27/2005 11:26:21 AM
Disabilities: a disqualification, restriction, or disadvantage... ok...eveyone out there when they first think of disabilities...they automatically think of someone in a wheel chair...or a mentally retarted person...well just to let you all know... EVERYONE has disabilities...some are just more apparent than others.... my disabilities...which are a lot...include...anemia, anger, depression....right now pregnancy...etc...there are a lot of things that keep me from doing certain activities... what are your disabilities? think hard about this too...maybe when you see your disabilities... you are less apt to judge people who have more visible disabilities...it's time to open your eyes people...and stop judging....but start relating...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 2 (view)

Acceptable discrimination Posted: 8/27/2005 11:12:14 AM
here are my thoughts...i recently dated a guy who wasn't all that intelligent...he couldn't read all that well...and his hand writing resembled a 2nd grader...but i didn't discriminate... he was a fantastic man...with a great heart...and we had such a great time together...i never tried to make him feel bad for what he could or could not do...i actually encouraged him to pursue college and follow his dreams...while being with him though...i did see however how everyone else saw him...his whole family pretty much expected nothing out of him...and they did make him feel "stupid" at times... i believe that the way our society has become...there are several things that have become acceptable...like the way everyone sees large people...it is acceptable now adays to make fun of them and to belittle them...same with people who have certain handicaps...the only thing i can't accept from these type of people are the ones who complain and use these as excuses...but it's not just how we see people that society has changed...look on the tv sometime...when you hear about kidnapping and horrific murders...you're not baffled or surprised anymore by that...b/c it has become so common that it is acceptable... but i also believe that people should not use society as an excuse for their behavior or their way of thinking...if you are an individual...then you will think what you want to think...despite what society shows...i could care less what type of people i see on tv...i don't envy them... and i don't think any less of people who don't look or act like people you see on tv...i think the way i think...and i believe that no matter what...if you have the confidence in yourself...and you believe that you can reach any goal out there no matter what...then you are a good person and i wouldn't think twice about talking to you...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 7 (view)

i give up Posted: 8/25/2005 9:12:40 PM
YAWN.....all i heard on here is COMPLAIN COMPLAIN COMPLAIN!!! here's not being fake for ya...STOP COMPLAINING...i'm not trying to be mean...but c'mon now...this is ridiculous...i'm getting tired of listening to this crap...so you give up on love huh?? you ACTUALLY thought you were gonna find it online huh?? well with an attitude like that...no WONDER you're still single...these people are soooo surprised when they get no attention...when no one wants to date them...well if you grow a little confidence people...then you just might have a chance... i don't know ANYONE who wants to date someone who talks bad about themselves all the time..or has such a bad attitude on subjects...or who gets really down on things...all they hear is the same thing i do...complaining...and that's NOT attractive....you should take this time of your life...being single...and take full advantage of it...get out there...have fun...find out what makes you happy...and when you do...and when you completely stop thinking about finding someone...then POOF...they magically appear...like out of no where...and i'll tell ya...if you don't know what makes you happy...how can you possibly make someone else happy...this is how i see it...i'm pregnant...i'm about to have my son in a couple of weeks... i also have a 2 1/2 year old daughter...and i'm single...yeah i don't like that fact...but ya know what??? if i don't find anyone right away...it's not that big of a deal...i'm going to enjoy the time i have with myself...i'm going to make sure that when i do meet someone that i'm happy with myself completely first...i KNOW i can live by myself...i KNOW i can be happy without a man around...and when i DO meet someone...i am completely confident...i know who i am...i know what i want to do...and i like that...and i show them this...and they become attracted that way...and about fake people...c'mon now...anyone who has half a brain knows that you will ALWAYS run into fake people...hell you're fake...everyone is...everyone puts on a fake face when they go out...everyone pretends...b/c everyone has their skeletons in their closet... and no one is about to share it with everyone when they leave the house...so fake? yes...welcome to reality...people are fake...mean? yes...welcome to reality...people are mean...there are people out there who do get a kick out of making other people feel bad... and i'll tell ya...if you let them get you down...you're absolutely doomed...for life...don't let what other people think affect you...if you do then we'll be seeing your pic in the paper for suicide...you just can't live your life basing your happiness on how other people see you...you have to be happy with yourself..and when you do...what other people say or do to you will just float right off your shoulders....i may be blunt...but this is what honesty is... and i don't know anyone who wouldn't agree with me...they just might say it a lot differently...but hey...that's what make me....me

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 2 (view)

raising a biracial child Posted: 8/22/2005 8:23:48 PM
i have a daughter who is half american half mexican...and i'm due to have a son who is the same...and i am a single mother...now my daughter will learn about her spanish heritage from her father...so i'm not too worried about that...on the other hand, my son will have to learn it all from me and his sister...i'm sure she will be more than happy to teach him spanish and everything...but the way i see it...i will try to learn all i can about the spanish heritage...past and present...so i can influence that in my home also...i want both of my kids to be proud of who they are and where they came from...and i believe that they are quite lucky to be able to learn about 2 cultures...i would try to influence both cultures if i were you...and show her how proud you are of that factor...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 42 (view)

No other way to get noticed... Posted: 8/19/2005 12:06:24 PM
well nothing really has happened lately...except for one thing...there was someone i was talking to online here for a while...well he got kinda busy and never got on again...and he was a really great support person...someone who made me feel good about things even at the worst of times...well i just talked to him for the first time on the phone yesterday...and it's like...if he didn't have to get going...we would've stayed on the phone for hours...he's actually someone i'm quite interested in...and he's interested in me also...but for now we are just friends because i live in indiana and he lives in colorado...we both agreed that if it is supposed to work out...then the distance thing will come together some time...we're in no big rush or anything...and i figured...i wanted to take things slowly in the first place...so this is actually quite perfect for me...and he loves kids...his mother actually runs a day care....so he's used to them...so...not sure where it will go..but only time will tell...if we just remain friends...that is just as good... i just went to the doctor today...everything is going pretty good...i'm getting quite closer to having my son...so i'm getting more and more excited..i'd actually wish it was coming sooner than later...but it'll get here eventually...well just keepin ya'll posted...bubye...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 21 (view)

okay what gives Posted: 8/17/2005 8:40:56 PM
tme1981....AAAAAAAAAMEEEEENNNN!

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 19 (view)

Hey ladies....I'm a RICH MAN... Posted: 8/17/2005 7:11:41 PM
i'm rich too...and i get reminded sooo many times...how rich i honestly am...for example...i went to go pick up my 2 1/2 year old daughter from her dad's last sunday...well she was sleeping...so her dad and i spoke for a while...when i was about to go i leaned down to wake her up...and she wakes up with the biggest smile on her face...then she reaches up and gives me the best hug...i almost wanted to start crying...but i didn't...i just thought about everything that's been going on and how unimportant so many things are compared to her...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 19 (view)

okay what gives Posted: 8/17/2005 6:58:35 PM
i'm sorry but i know plenty of spanish men and woman...my kids are even mixed...and all i've EVER seen was what i posted...and i'm sorry again...but i've NEVER met a loyal spanish man... EVER....hell i thought i'd be treated as a queen dating spanish men...but all i got was crap... not even a nice piece of jewelry....i've learned to just stay in my culture...b/c they wanted someone who would just lay back and let them do as they please...but my comment wasn't towards you in the first place...but that's ok...my advice...stick to your race...it works much better that way...

xxaventuraxx

Joined: 7/21/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

okay what gives Posted: 8/17/2005 11:50:59 AM
well if you are a decent guy....and what that person is looking for...then i'm sure you'll have a pretty good chance...but you still need to be cautious in who you talk to b/c there are still all those people out there that will take you for a ride...

Show ALL Forums