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Thread: Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 202 (view)

Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers? Posted: 11/24/2009 11:36:39 AM
keep you just need to keep she's out there

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 88 (view)

Would You Date a Women with 6 children? Posted: 11/24/2009 11:09:15 AM
I'm not a man but ya sure. Why not? I'd date a man with 6 (if they are from less then 6 woman) As for the "loose down thair" stuff thats not always true, heck that can be true of a woman who has no kids. I have a daughter and I could have five more, I have no chance of any child making it through my hips so add that into the fact I did and do keagles (not sure of spelling) I don't think all woman can nor will get loose. Guess she'll have to hold out for mr right, just like every other parent should. Good luck

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 1 (view)

The long time friend turned into the new man...help! Posted: 5/25/2009 7:19:19 PM
I've just started dating a guy I've been friends with for about ten years (off and on always a phone call away kinda friend), sounds great ahh? Put aside the risk of losing a long good friendship for a minute and to my real issue, he knows and gets along with my daughter, she's two. Now that we're dating I'm not so sure the whole playing house thing is a good idea. He's always came over a few days a month or more and we just hang out, go to the park have picnic's ect now I'm not so sure I like my daughter getting so attached to him... Only problem is how do you nicely say now that we're dating can we stop being friends lol I really like him and by no means want to cause any issues but as I said the whole playing house thing is moving way to fast...anyone get where I'm coming from? Am I being an idiot? Maybe just scarred? Any advice anyone crossed this line before and have idea's on what to do if you like the other side but it keeps you up at night worried if you made an awful mistake... ANY ADVICE???

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 5 (view)

I need to know how to find out if a good daycare with no complaints Posted: 4/29/2009 7:05:22 PM
Thanks I'll try that in the morning... I just have to do this the right way. I think some of you have been in the fight I'm starting. Wish me luck! I'm worried but that's another post. Thanks again I'll try all of the above.

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 1 (view)

I need to know how to find out if a good daycare with no complaints Posted: 4/28/2009 11:58:29 AM
Hi, I have a two and a hafe year old and I need to find a very good daycare, me and her father are going through custody issues and my lawyer says I need a daycare above reproach, i've tried google any idea's? I'm in Ontario.

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

Do women actually exist that date men with kids?? Posted: 4/25/2009 2:48:59 PM
Lol. really??? I only date single fathers I do draw the line if it's a weekend dad that can't understand I am a full time mom and thinks I should hire a sitter for every whim he has.

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 56 (view)

late child support Posted: 4/25/2009 2:33:44 PM
You guys are right! It was a sighn that he'd stop paying....two months behind going on the 3rd. I guess 9 months out of two and a half year's is good. I think I have a long road ahead, but I can do this on my own again. LOL that first year was a killer on the money frount any tips on ones to come that will crunch my cash flow?

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 666 (view)

Do women mind single dads with kids Posted: 2/23/2009 4:39:01 PM
I only date single dads! Men with no kids don't get the love I have for my daughter and don't get that she is always #1...

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

Soon-to-be single parent. Posted: 1/14/2009 11:52:43 AM
Hi, relax take a minute to breath. I've been almost right where you are, I gave up 3 cat's and a dog. I had no license, no car, a drug doing and dealing ex. I had to move in with my mom. I had to move back to my home town, so I had to leave my job as well. I was 23 (just I turned 23 the same month I got pregnant) lol It is hard for a lot of people it's not only you! You need to tell someone in your real day to day life. I had "the baby blues" b4 I had the baby which sounds like what your feeling so get help for you sake and the baby's. You have a lot of hard choices to make that you will have to live with forever so take some time and make sure you can live with what ever you need to do. Only you can make a lot of the choice's that need to be made. All the things you gave up are nothing compared to what you can gain. You already gained, your better off without the guy (from what you said) your health is better off if you cut back on the smoking and drinking. You can get everything in order to be where you need to be it take's some work but it can be dun I did. As for the cats I had dreams about mine and woke up in tears missing them but now I think of what I have and where I was when I had them both physically and mentally and know I'm better off. I love my daughter more then I ever could love any pet and I love animals. Don't give up it's one day at a time and one step at a time. Take a step and the next one will follow. Good luck!

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 14 (view)

Would you consider this selfish? Posted: 1/14/2009 11:16:55 AM
No not at all. You could miss out on great date's but I'm sure you'll find lots of men looking for the same. I'd date someone with children younger then mine, but she's only 2 so I have to be sure they are really broken up with the child's mother. lol now a days you may end up raising your grandchildren so don't count on being dun. It's not selfish to know what you want, it's selfish if you turn your back on your child after they turn 18, but you haven't said that's what you'll do just don't forget children often move home again, some even move home again and again lol. Good luck

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 43 (view)

late child support Posted: 1/8/2009 12:24:50 PM
okay, okay I knew I'd get a lot of "be glad you get any" and I am but I'm only months into getting anything, lol and not even two years into being a parent. I wanted advice, okay maybe I wanted someone to see that maybe I'm right it's a power play for him to pay days shy of me being able to take it to court. I have realized that I don't need his money along time ago, the first year I didn't ask or get a phone call let alone money. I'm the one that made the mistake by thinking maybe he changed and would pay from now on so I stupidly increased my payments, (ie collage, savings, ect) but I've now realized that it does not matter if he thinks it's a power play to pay late it matters if it is a power play and the latter is up to me. So I'm just going back to thinking it's not coming that way I won't be caught off guard. Thanks for all the advise.

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 16 (view)

late child support Posted: 1/6/2009 6:22:13 PM
Okay, you say not to be so quick to judge yet your judging me. I understand that you don't know the back story but my daughter was planned, he wanted her more then I did. I'm working two job's and going back to school. I'd give him all "his" money back if he'd spend more time with her. He doesn't pay rent he lives with his parents. He doesn't even have to buy food. Oh ya and I left him cause he has control issues and domestic violence issues. That's why I wonder if he dose it on purpose. I just wanted to know if anyone had advice not to put me down for asking. I only have one child, she'll be two soon so I'm not very far into parenting. I'm learning as I go I assume there are other parents out there in the same boat. If he called and said I can't make the payment then that would be fine I wouldn't have to wonder. My parents wouldn't call just to complain about him being a dead beat (cheque goes to there house he's not aloud to know where we live) I sometimes wonder if it's worth all the hassle I'd love to just say no more support payments I'll keep doing it on my own but it's not my support. It's her's.

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 8 (view)

late child support Posted: 1/6/2009 2:17:31 PM
I'm in an okay spot, I can have the b-day party without it I should have explained better. I just don't use savings for day to day costs. It started on time now it's closer to the end of the month. I'm just wondering, it's my first child and he has only been paying 8 months, I think I've let him away with to much. I didn't make him pay for the first 15 months and didn't go after it when an agreement was made. I just don't want him to think it's okay to walk on me any more and I'm starting to think sending the money late is his way of asserting power over my life...lol I know I must sound like a nut job but I just wanted some feed back from others that faced the same problem. Thanks for the advice. Keep it coming!

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 1 (view)

late child support Posted: 1/6/2009 12:51:52 PM
I know I should be glad I get any at all, but it's always late, every month it gets later by at least a day, it's court ordered 1 st of every month. Am I being to picky? Our daughter's birthday party is this month and I could really use the cash (he never buys x-mas gifts or lol come to think of it he has never bought her a gift at all) So I need to know is there any way to make him pay on time or just let it go? If it comes it comes if it dose not then deal with it then...any idea's? Am I being to picky?

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 63 (view)

Would Single Moms Do it over Again? Posted: 12/4/2008 9:40:13 AM
I would do it again in a heartbeat. Even with all the b.s. with my ex I'd still do it all again with him because if I didnt my daughter would'nt be who she is. Now when it comes to would I do it all again with another child, if it was the same kind of situation I dont know. Knowing if I did I'd be taking from my daughter lol I guess that's really another question I hope I'll never face. The hardest part of being a single Mom for me so far id say is time, I have to work alot more then I'd have to if my ex steped up cause I have to pay for a sitter when I work. If he spent some time with her then I wouldnt have to pay someone everytime I need or have to go out. Plus I feel guilty that I cant spend all the time I want with her. lol life as a single parent can be a juggling act and dropping the ball is just not an option. (for me anyways) Thair are plus' to being a single parent I dont have to see if my punishment is okay with someone else, when I say no it means no and I get all the bedtime hugs and kiss's lol

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 36 (view)

Child support Posted: 7/7/2008 6:12:44 PM
LOL, my ex pays his child support so I guess I'm lucky I even get that (less then $50 a week) but he's never met my daughter. I dont think he ever will, he's into a bad life style. She's just a get out of jail card to him....But I'm not bitter, he's doing whats right for her. Even if it's for the rong reasons.

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 142 (view)

How many deadbeat moms do you know? Posted: 5/23/2008 1:21:33 PM
^^^I feel your pain, my deadbeat is a man, but same problems, (almost) He's a crack head, has a junkie prostitute girlfriend. Right now I'm lucky she dosnt know he's missing yet, (she's 1 and hafe) I dread the day when she asked where's daddy, and feels all the pain that comes with knowing. I use to know three deadbeat mom's but now that I have my own, I cant hang out with them...I know thair children (9 in all) are better off without them, and my daughter is better off never knowing them as well. I all single parents. (who are good parents) It the hardest job I will ever have and it's the best job in the world.

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 368 (view)

Do children need a father? Posted: 5/23/2008 12:52:50 PM
^^^ I also think children need good role models of both men and women, the role models dont have to be thair parents. My daughter has a father whom I wouldnt call a good role model, so to counter his bad influence I make sure she spends alot of time with great male role models. Men who will be a part of her life no matter what. Her dad can go in and out all he wants, I'll make sure she knows that he's only one man not all men.

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 6 (view)

the invisible mom wipes tear Posted: 5/1/2008 8:07:23 AM
Thank you! That is so true and wonderfully put!

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 6 (view)

Dating other single parents with kids ages? Posted: 4/29/2008 1:42:35 PM
op, I'm a single mom with a toddler. I think the idea of a "built in babysitter" has never crossed my mind, I dont think kids should be left with kids. Even if they are realated let alone if thair the girlfriends kids. I wouldnt date a man who didnt want anymore or any kids. My daughter was not planned so I dont want to end up with a child with someone whom dosnt want kids. So to answer your question for myself I dont care how old his kids are or if he has none as long as he wants more.

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 15 (view)

okay so i want more kids. Posted: 4/27/2008 9:41:01 AM
op, It's a deal breaker for alot of men also. I have one child I am a single mom and I do need another child...I dont care if I have the child (although cause my dad is a twin it maybe two you want to see people run lol) or adopt or meet a man with children. I just want my kid to know the love of a sibling. I have siblings I love very much and I think it's a love I could not deprive my child of. Good luck

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 10 (view)

Race issues Posted: 4/20/2008 5:15:54 PM
Hey, I am from one of those familys your talking about. My oldest brother is white and me and my oter brother are "mixed" malato. My dad is my oldest broter's dad- END OF STORY. Lol I mean really it matters more to you then it will to your children. My "white" brother is every bit as much my brother as my other brother...people use to think we all had different fathers. (I'm very light for a malato) As for the "guys" your concerned about maybe you need to look more at your real thoughts on "mixed" race cause if the guy's your hanging with have a problem with you dating outside your race then maybe you need new friends or to accept your real feelings. I love being malato and I think it has made me who I am. I really dont see skin colour as a problem. Love comes in every wrapper. I was told of where my ancesters came from and to respect myself and others...my african side is as important to know about as my irish....lol I dont know if I helped any but this is just afew thoughts from a malato...

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

I have a question about how to introduce my daughter to her father Posted: 4/20/2008 3:23:54 PM
Thanks for the idea's. I am over the fact that it took so long and a court order to get him involved. I didnt go after him for the back pay, or even for the money now. I just wanted some intication that he wanted to be part of her life or sighn over his rights. I just kinda wanted to know where he stood on if he wanted to be a dad or not...We parted on bad terms alot of childish behavior on both of our parts. I want her to know her dad, or at least his family. Any idea's on how to ask in a nice way if he could leave his girlfriend at home? (she's a "working girl" with a bad drug problem) I know sooner or later my daughter will meet this "woman" but I dont want to deal with her and have my dislike of her make my daughter feel like I dont like her dad...He has already said he wants to bring her for back up. I dont think we need to add more people for her to meet all at once, and once she knows him the next people she should meet are her grandparents or aunt and cousins...am I being to picky?

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 27 (view)

Do I have to let my ex help me choose a name for the baby? Posted: 4/17/2008 8:07:59 PM
NO WAY!! I was in the same boat! I dumped my ex 5 months along and he did nothing for me or my daugher yet wanted her to have his last name! LOL He wanted alot of things but guess what I did it all my way, my body, my baby my choices! It's up to you whats best for you. If he misses the birth he can never get that back, but if he makes the birth hell for you, you can never get that back! You will know in your heart whats best, for you and your child.

Joined: 4/11/2008

Msg: 1 (view)

I have a question about how to introduce my daughter to her father Posted: 4/17/2008 6:38:33 PM
I have a year and a hafe year old daughter who has never met her father he is starting to pay child support (i took him to court) next month and he wants to meet my daughter. I am wondering how to go about them meeting, where, when, who should be thair...ect...has anyone out thair dun this before? She is my first and i'm not sure about how to introduce her to her father, she has never seen him before...Any idea's?

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