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Thread: 45 is it to old?

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 15 (view)

45 is it to old? Posted: 10/17/2006 7:06:48 AM
NO WAY is 45 "too old"! I just turned 45, and I feel like I am just finally figuring out what I want, and how to get it. The first step was realizing that I am okay. Just me. I do not have to introduce myself as "we" or "PJ and_____ " to feel like a whole human...PJ is "whole"( and raisin' hell) all by herself. 45 is great...and SINGLE is real good, too. I go out with who I want, if I want. Variety is the spice of life...lol.

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 9 (view)

Average or longest online started relationship that you have had Posted: 4/24/2006 10:28:44 AM
5 LONG years. We met online in an MSN group I started, dated a while, then lived together 5 years until he met a 21 year old girl(the same age as his oldest son) whom he decided was more what he needed at the time. It worked out better for both of us in the long run, and we are on comfortable terms now...Almost like sister and brother! The most deceiving part was that he said he had his own place, when in fact he lived with his mother! Guess I should have headed for the hills at that very first sign of lying. Oh well! You live and you learn.

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 4 (view)

In DALLAS, TX and 40-PLUS Posted: 3/31/2006 11:16:38 AM
Wow...You're not kidding...45 people (thus far) have viewed the thread, but you have been the only "nibble"! Well, we will give it some time and see if some of these folks on here are more than just talk. Has the whole world given up "real life" friendships and relationships for "cyber"?

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 3 (view)

In DALLAS, TX and 40-PLUS Posted: 3/29/2006 10:29:31 AM
Well, that's a start! Maybe I shoulld put the link to this thread in my POF profile. The peole who view the profile might check out the thread. Think it's worth a try.

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 1 (view)

In DALLAS, TX and 40-PLUS Posted: 3/28/2006 10:25:33 AM
This thread is for people in or near Dallas, Texas who are 40 and over or who WANT to date someone in the Dallas area in that age range. Just trying to narrow the search a bit in this big ol' sea of fish. Let's plan a Dallas area 40-something and admirers get-together! Could be fun! Ideas? Comments?

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 368 (view)

Who IS serious about finding someone here??? Posted: 9/6/2005 6:32:13 AM
I am very serious about finding a real relationship here. But so far, the only guys I have found are only looking for a thing on the side(i.e., a mistress), or a one night stand. Then there are those who just want cyber sex. And of course there are the straight up fakes who are just here becuz it's free, and to see what they can see...it's not real to them; more like a game. Then there are those few who sound like Mr Perfect....until I discover Mr Perfect lives a thousand miles away...lol. May be plenty of fish in this sea, but sure is hard to catch the one you want... But I remain optimistic!

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 77 (view)

People helping people Posted: 9/4/2005 8:32:02 AM
Hi Blady and everyone! I have been offline a while. Great to see the thread going strong! [There is nothing worse than being addicted to an addict.] Truer words were never spoken! Personally, I have recently discovered a 12 step group called CoDA to help me get over my own 5 year "addiction" (co-dependence) to an alcoholic and addict. It's really weird how some of us dance the dance with the addicted person, taking resposibility for them, planning our own lives around them...In my case, he left me, but it was the best thing that could have ever happened to me, because it let me see how unhealthy our relationship was, for me as well as for him! Well, just thought I would add that. Codependents Anonymous (CoDA)....and it's free!

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 103 (view)

world population is too high Posted: 8/19/2005 7:52:00 AM
Historically the earth has a way of cleansing itself by way of "natural disasters". We humans will not have to kill one another to "thin the herd". Have you guys heard of that Avian Bird Flu? As I understand it, it has mutated to a point that humans will be infected by it, and no one, not one single person, will have a natural immunity to this deadly virus, and developing a vaccine is hampered by the fact that chickens (or chicken eggs) are used to test and develope the vaccines and this virus is 100% fatal to chickens. When the virus sweeps across the world the first time it will cause the greatest number of human fatalities. The second time will be less as anti-bodies develope, and so on. But from what I have heard, even if a vaccine can be developed before this predicted tragedy occurs, getting it to all the humans of the earth will be impossible, so only a chosen few (and who gets to choose?) would benefit.

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 11 (view)

does getting older scare u? Posted: 8/18/2005 5:39:50 PM
"getting older doesn't scare me... getting older without someone else doesn't sound like a treat...." Same here!!!

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 103 (view)

Gators on 8/20?@tackytammy Posted: 8/18/2005 1:46:47 PM
Kinda quiet in here...doesn't look like it's happening this weekend.

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 40 (view)

People helping people Posted: 8/18/2005 1:25:24 PM
Hi everyone, a special hi to twinkz( I think we have all had that "ignored new guy " feeling), and thanks Blady and tme1981 for taking the time to read and lend advice to me. I am definitely going to try and use some of the suggestions you've made, and I really am beginning to look forward to the good things to come. An "open road" is a good analogy, tme1981...and I have always wanted to travel!!! This is definitely not going to be boring, and I am beginning to believe that it could be a whole lot of fun. Hey, BLady, I think you may have a very active thread in the making here! P.S. to BLady: Yes girlfriend, I think english and spanish mix just fine!

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 102 (view)

do u believe in long distance relationships Posted: 8/17/2005 10:06:19 AM
1 1/2 hours away is not bad at all...you can drive that distance. But when it turns into a serious distance, like he's in Oregan and she's in Florida, or even worse, he's in Sweden and she's in Texas, then how can it truly work unless one of you is rich, and able to grab a jet to your loved one whenever the mood hits you?

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 8 (view)

PEOPLE HELPING PEOPLE Posted: 8/17/2005 7:54:00 AM
Thanks both of you for the great advice. Actually this is the first time in my life that I can say I am truly "alone". My existance up to this point has been as someones daughter, someones wife, someones mother, someones girlfriend...but never just as myself. But now, my dear mother is gone, she passed away this past Mother's day, May 8, and she was living with me at the end. My two children are gone, both young adults living their lives on their own(and I am very proud of them).And now this break-up just a few weeks later... And suddenly I have to try to figure out what I "like" and what makes me "happy". As odd as it may sound, I have no idea. I have always tried to please those that I love, and to make sure they were happy and comfortable, and that was where I found my own joy. I am not trying to sound like some selfless martyr, but I think that is the way many of us were raised to be, especially women, who are usually the "nurturers" of our species. But now I have to actually please only myself (and of course God), and I am so clueless. Thx BLady for those ideas about pampering myself...and learning Spanish is something I have wanted to do for years, so learning a language is also a terrific idea. And I know you are both right. This whole thing will take time.

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 100 (view)

do u believe in long distance relationships Posted: 8/17/2005 7:36:21 AM
Right now I am corresponding with someone by email and telephone who is on the opposite side of the world from me, and he wants to pursue a relationship and insists it can work. He claims he is willing to eventually relocate, blah, blah, blah, and that "love" can and will conquer all, even the vast geographic distance between us. But for me it doesn't feel real, and will not feel that way unless we have the opportunity to physically meet each other. Once we meet, and if we were to hit it off in person, I would want to be around him. So for me, I guess I do not "believe" in long distance relationships, because I would want to be able to go out and do things with the special person in my life, to touch him, hold his hand, etc., etc.,and I would want to see him on a regular basis, or even daily. But that's just me. Obviously everyone is different, and those long distance things work out for some people but I do not believe it would ever work for me.

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 101 (view)

Gators on 8/20? Posted: 8/17/2005 5:53:56 AM
The twentieth is approaching fast....is it a date?

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 4 (view)

PEOPLE HELPING PEOPLE Posted: 8/17/2005 5:50:50 AM
Hi BLady, This thread is a fine idea, and thank you for starting it. If I may, I would like some opinions. I have recently(about 6 weeks ago) had a 5 year relationship end abruptly, and not by my choice. My question is this: In matters of the heart, is it like "falling off of a horse", and I should get back on(begin dating) as soon as possible, or should I give myself more time to grieve the relationship that just ended? At age 43, yes, I have loved and lost before but for some reason I cannot seem to bounce back from this one. Thanks 4 your help!

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 23 (view)

Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?@princessofcanadia Posted: 8/14/2005 7:22:31 AM
Princess, it's good to hear that you are starting to date again...I think that is probably the best medicine right now. Just take your time and have fun.

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this? Posted: 8/13/2005 2:05:19 PM
I am certainly feeling your pain right now. In fact I am still working on mending my own broken heart, as I was basically suddenly "dumped" by a person I loved and lived together with for 5 years, and your letter sounds like one I could have written. I know you just want him to understand your hurt and "feel" something about what he meant to you...and you want to hear that you meant something to him too...But the best thing to do is let it go. Someone else here said it just right...no amount of letters, calls, or emails will make any difference. Don't get me wrong....I have not been "miss calm" throughout my ordeal, but give yourself time and it will gradually get better. If you have already sent that letter, do not expect anything...he might not even finish reading it, and even if he does, then what? Nothing...he will not suddenly see the "errors of his ways" and change his mind about the break-up, and it's not likely that he will say something to you that's gonna make you feel any better. So, just hang in there. I know it is unpleasant right now, but you will be just fine. Know that your heart was in the right place, and that if this guy had been "Mr. Right" he would still be there.

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 98 (view)

@undercover Posted: 8/11/2005 1:52:21 PM
So....August 20th? Cool....now....where?

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 24 (view)

its over Posted: 8/8/2005 8:40:25 PM
Yeah...I know....still, I will be glad when it doesn't feel like the wind has been knocked out of me every time I think of him....

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 22 (view)

its over Posted: 8/8/2005 8:13:46 PM
Hmmm..."better to have love then lost than to have never loved at all"...that's what they say, but I beg to differ. This s*it HURTS, and hurting SUCKS. But then there were the good times......

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

its over Posted: 8/7/2005 9:35:41 PM
Nah...don't want to hurt an innocent to feel better. I was thinking more along the lines of using my 5 years of knowledge about him(his dirty little secrets) against him to totally devastate his life!!!! JUST KIDDING!!!! I wouldn't be that petty....or would I?? Hehehehe...nah....

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 87 (view)

DFW Area Get together possible?? Posted: 8/7/2005 8:01:02 PM
Too short notice for this weekend, but we could start thinking of a future date...

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

its over Posted: 8/7/2005 7:45:22 PM
I sympathize with you completely. I just got dumped by the man I loved and lived with for 5 years just a little under a month ago, and whover said it feels like a death is absolutely right... to make it worse, he did it 8 weeks after my mom passed away. Sorry to get into my own problems...just want you to know you are not alone, and we will be O.K. in time...

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 85 (view)

DFW Area Get together possible?? Posted: 8/5/2005 9:23:56 PM
Wow...sorry I missed it. Was going through major life changes...a break-up...moved...but now it's time to mingle. Would be cool if it could become a monthly event!

Joined: 8/4/2005

Msg: 83 (view)

DFW Area Get together possible?? Posted: 8/5/2005 6:18:15 AM
I left POF for a while and just returned with a new screen name. Did y'all ever have a get together for the Dfw area?? Do you have one planned now?

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