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 Author Thread: Help with endurance
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Help with endurance
Posted: 11/22/2009 11:09:38 AM
practice. All men are at risk of this happening from time to time...especially if you're with a new partner and the excitement level is high...

If this is an issue that stays with you even after the novelty has worn off then there are creams and sprays that help with sensitivity...
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 11 (view)
 
He is not in to me or dont want anything serious???
Posted: 11/22/2009 11:00:55 AM
if he were into you he'd want something more serious and would make sure you knew it. If you have to ask if it's working out...it probably isn't.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1391 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/22/2009 10:57:45 AM
That's right Rick...keep ducking and slipping...one will connect eventually.

250 years??? You call the last 250, blood soaked years a success??? No wonder you conservatives mess things up so bad...such low expectations!!!

I don't have a king or queen making my healthcare decisions...and my health care ranks a good 7 places ahead of your rusty, slapped together system that bases success and long term viability on who gets excluded...

37 th in the world Rick...all because you've been warring with yourselves and the rest of the world so long...at least when you weren't going to communists for economic rescue...
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1389 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/22/2009 10:49:55 AM

sad funny if you know what I mean.


I don't...and I doubt you do either. The fact that you and others keeps bringing biological limitations into a debate that involves laws and rights is the funny part...it has nothing to do with it.

If you were alive 100 years ago and having a debate about slavery...you'd be one of the people saying " Come on...blacks want equality??? That's ridiculous...their brains aren't big enough for one...and they're black...everyone knows they can never be equal...that they were brought to this great country and share in it's bounty in order to serve us...."

you're "that guy".

Congrats.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1386 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/22/2009 10:43:39 AM
You wouldn't have needed the dreaded socialized style of healthcare if 1.) Capitalism actually worked...it doesn't...you will figure it out sooner or later just like the rest of the planet...it's like soccer in a way...you're the only ones here not playing it...

and 2.) If George Bush hadn't spent all your countries future earnings chasing oil with every penny and spare life your country has.

This is all the fault of George Bush and his republicans who are so anti regulation that they allowed the captains of industry to make things so bad with plain and simple greed that your countries entire philosohical compass has shifted, those same captains having been forced to go to the government with their hats in their hands...

Clearly America wants and needs some socialization...you keep asking for it enough!!!


And Forumologist...it is that simple. Don't let a biology lesson get in the way of a philosohpy or law lesson. Biology has nothing to do with any of this.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1382 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/22/2009 10:24:39 AM
And Rick....every single Republican, Democrat....Libertarian...etc...everyone knows that the Republicans and George Bush are to blame for what is still an ugly economy and an almost uglier American national reputation...seriously...just say...ok...we messed up and let Bush invade two sovereign nations without just cause already!
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1380 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/22/2009 10:15:13 AM
You said it, if a man chooses to not use that input to control his reproductive rights he is relegating them to....


*sigh*...really....it's like arguing with my ex wife...I just addressed this comment...which you've alread made btw...in the very post you're quoting from...and you repeat it??? Really??? Again...I submit that some will just not let logic or reason get in the way of a good temper tantrum or hissy fit.


So I can only assume 2 things


Oh see now you make sense...in that you choose to not make sense by allowing your imagination to take control in the form of assumptions.

Again I say unto you...we are not speaking of the man, who layeth down without any care for his seed...truely he should useth the sheath....but at the end of the day...this issue is NOT about who's more to blame for conception...that's moot really...

The issue IS in fact about what happens AFTER conception....AFTER that home test reads positive. Well what happens is that the man that woman conceived with suddenly becomes a slave to her whims. If she decides to carry the fetus and deliver a full term baby...then it's all up to her. She can decide to do that or not. We're not here to debate abortion rights...simply that men should have the same rights to abortion that women already have...now can you address that issue specifically instead of just regurgitating the same "ape man" scenario that makes a victim of the women in question???

Can you please tell me why a man shouldn't have the same right to terminate his parental rights and responsibilities that every single woman in North America has???

Tell me why it's ok for one sex to have an abortion and not the other?

 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1162 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/20/2009 12:02:25 PM
Guess what. REAL women are looking for men like AC...who know what "taking responsibility for one's actions" really means.


Oh the shame...I must not be a real man because I think that taking responsibilty lies with the one with the power to choose...which is what taking responsibility hinges on...all aboard the immasculation train...Now leaving left field.

A real man doesn't pay child support, he spends half his time raising that child and making whatever changes in his life to do so...at least that's what I have done.

Both sexes have input over pregnancy, but only one has the final decision over having a baby...there's your round room now go find a corner...
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1160 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/20/2009 11:51:57 AM
If you choose to not use birth control, then you have chosen to not have control


Nobody said no birth control, and whether I use it or not... following your logic suggests that any woman who lays with a man and doesn't make sure he's using protection like say a condom...is just a guilty as the man for not putting it on!

But I don't believe in arguing sematics or twisting words when someone else's logic is ironclad.


The decision to not make a baby was your to either take or abandon


Wrong, as per the current abortion laws. HER body...HER choice...and I say her Responsibility. It follows the logic of the other two parts of the statement...


only women are responsible for birth control


Nobody is saying that. You keep stating that we are...but nobody has said that. Abortion is another form of birth control...one that men currently have no right to...even in the figurative sesne...and yet...it's as easy as saying that men will have the right to choose to raise a child or not...just like a woman does.

And we're lucky this isn't rocket science...something as simple as a+b =C is either not understood, or if it is, completely ignored for the reason that it completely guts any argument to the contrary by the very nature of it's simplicity. And it really is that simple.


Why are you arguing for men that make bad decisions


I'm not...as that's a question of morality and not for me to judge. I'm not interested in the ritcheous moral high ground here...I'm simply arguing for equal rights for all people under the law. Not only is it possible it is necessary for all the reasons I've mentioned thus far...for involved dads and men who choose to abort...
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1151 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/20/2009 11:21:45 AM

BUT when the issue of an unwanted pregnancy rears its head all of a sudden their position is that ALL they were was a sperm donator and shouldnt be held responsible for being a parent and supporting that child.


If I could give birth, and had sole right to do so or not, I wouldn't expect anyone else to carry the responsibility of such a gift...especially when my right to choose outweighed the rights of the fetus and the other parent...and I wouldn't try to villify someone who didn't want to raise that child with me...

A sperm donor is someone who donates their sperm for the sole purpose of conception. Having sex with a woman because it feels good to do so does not make you a sperm donor...just a partner in recreational sex. If you have no control over what happens regarding a potential baby...whether you want it or not...then why should you be held directly accountable for what is in fact someone else's decision???

Because that is what is expected of men today and it's barbaric. Chains and shackles do not a slave make in this case...those bonds can be invisible or exist in the form of a court order...all the same thing when you look at it objectively as an issue and not a moral issue with the emotional attachments to go with it.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1148 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/20/2009 11:01:19 AM
Father's rights do not have to be any more mutually exclusive to child's rights than the mother's are...oh wait...that's right, the right to have an abortion in the first place kind of puts a hole in that argument...pardon the pun.

The fact that the child exists is solely based on the mother's decision to deliver a baby...that's what the law says anyway. It's not a child into well into the pregnancy...giving momma all sorts of time to make decisions that no man is able to make for himself. His being a parent or not is not his decision.

Are women willing to have the decision to be a parent or not taken from them??? Of course not...at least not those who are pro-choice. I'm simply pro-choice for both the mother AND the father...it's only fair right?
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1143 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/20/2009 9:43:09 AM

THAT might teach some men to keep their pecker in their pants


Really??? 46 pages and THAT'S the nugget of originality you offer us??? Honestly???

What part of "we men deserve the same rights as women...period." is so difficult for people like you to understand? Was it easier for you to get when the the words women and men were switched around not too long ago???

What is the disconnect in your thinking that allows you to condone women having the choice to have an abortion...or essentially not be a parent one way or another...but that men should not have the same right? I am a dad, and would love more kids...and as I've already stated, the stench of this way of thinking blows far and greatly impacts the day to day interraction between separate parents to the point that it is perfectly acceptable for a mother to not honour the letter of a custody agreement. To the point that the father has to call the police everytime she violates the agreement before the court or anyone will listen to him...and even then they don't take him seriously.

The point is that this issue affects everyone on a number of levels, but ultimately we should all have the same rights. A woman who delivers a baby does so on her own...it's completely her decision regardless of any other factors...so let's just keep it that way AFTER the baby is born as well! Problem solved, society gains from reduced custody and paternity suits...less money spent chasing people, women finally get the responsibility that the right to birth a child comes with and men get equality with women so that those who do not want to be involved can essentially have an abortion...and those that do want to be involved face less obstacles in doing so.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 1139 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/20/2009 9:27:43 AM

Wanna...you must be smokin' some good ganja, dude. Men voluntarily putting themselves at risk of becoming daddys, in return for a booty call, is TOTALLY different than slaves being forcefully captured, chained, dragged off to a foreign land, separated from family, beaten, raped, worked half to death, and all for just bare subsistance rations and a chance to sleep in sh*t/p*ss coated hay in a barn with the horses/pigs...or a woman having to fight for the chance to work in a factory-for less pay than men get for the same work-as the only alternative to either starving to death as a homeless urchin, or working as prostitute to barely make enough money to survive,and then having 85% of their earnings taken by pimps, madames,and crooked cops. Get real, boy. You are so full of sh*t that you should change your name to Sewer.


I disagree...again you focus more on the act and the purely relative morality involved than the consequences. Equal Human Rights really shouldn't have levels of importance. Is it more important to level the workplace playing field for women, minorities or the physically disabled??? Who gets pulled out of the ocean first in your opinion?

You are simply not being objective....and insults like this mess are the weak man's imitation of strength.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 941 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/19/2009 10:41:18 AM

The ideal is always a great thing. I'd post a thread saying I want to win a sweepstakes


Since when are human rights about what's ideal and convenient??? This is a ridiculous comaparison. Again...was it ideal to free the slaves??? Was it convenient and socially acceptable to invite women into the workplace??

All difficult transitions that we're still wrestling with...but very much the same thing as what we're discussing here.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 932 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/19/2009 9:43:08 AM

Jeeezzuz wanna...did you EVER graduate from Kindergarden? Nothing is equal...ever. It can't be


See...I said you'd say that...verbatim...and you STILL did. Like has been said since your response...try telling women, minorities and the disabled that things can never be equal...see how that goes over!

Equality in this case is a choice. Women can choose to be responsible for what happens to their bodies, our government can choose to level the playing field...and society can choose to take on this cause like it's taken on the other causes mentioned...

But as is clear from this thread...those who do not agree with recognizing men as equals to women with regards to parenting issues are simply not interested in logic, reason, human rights or simply doing WHAT IS RIGHT. We can argue all day about the morality of the issue...or we can look at it objectively and see the simple equation for what it is...a simple effing equation. All people deserve equal rights under the law in all aspects of their lives...not just where it's convenient to do so. I mean...should we stop installing wheelchair ramps because that costs money???

No, we recognize that making people feel validated as equals is far more important that arguing the semantics involved. In this area...things seem so black and white...easy to act on...and the parenting issue is just as easy and necessary. The fact that men aren't treated as equals goes further too...just ask me or some other divorced dads out there about just how difficult it can be to get what you're entitled to in terms of custody and access...despite having all the paperwork in order etc...despite being an ideal father figure...all simply because women still have power that goes above and beyond what is written into custody agreements...and nobody wants to mess with that...

In short this prevailing attitude alienates good fathers from their kids, all because mom has the power to do so. This is simply not right...not just and cannot be allowed to continue for any damn reason!
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 830 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/18/2009 12:14:40 PM

WHAT specific rights should men have that they now lack?


...see here's the other underlying attitude issue. You can't honestly say that things are equal can you??? I've already addressed where things aren't equal and how it can be fixed but that doesn't interest you and others like you. It's about villifying men so that you and the woman involved doesn't have to be responsible for WHAT IS HER CHOICE (accept it...we all have!) at the end of it all.


I can see why your side worries about the financial aspect of making women solely responsible for their respective choices. I can even see how many liberal types would cry foul on behalf of the "children" and get away with that...but honestly...you cannot tell me that things are equal. You will likely tell me that things can never be equal because of biology...etc...all stuff we've heard and countered here and in other threads. Things CAN be equal...just like we working toward in the workplace...it just means that the side with the power has to give some of it up and the rest of society, myself included may have to help these women carry the load they chose to pick up on their own. Still, the father, should he not want to be one, should not be forced to be one...just like we don't force these women to be mothers. Men should have the same right to abort their responsibility as a potential parent just like any woman has. Why is that so hard to grasp???

Because the evil man ape went and got her pregnant??? He didn't, two people had some sex...a woman got pregnant from it...as is the potential...and now she gets to decide whether to keep it or not....whether to give it up to the state....all the while the male has no say or right of refusal...this is the very definition of in-equality...I don't care if it does involve sexual indescretion and a child...rights are rights!!!

Get it now? nope...not likely...

Which also means that society may have to pay something toward the decisions these poor defenseless women are making on their own...such is the cost of that kind of decision making power...but hey...why should we expect women to be equals and pull their own weight in this day and age?
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 823 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/18/2009 11:36:15 AM

It is still a matter of choices, and men who make bad choices should pay for the fallout of their choices.


and when we men have fair input over the choice to be a parent I'll agree with you...but we don't. Taxes...the cost to society be damned...men deserve equal rights in all aspects of their lives...we all deserve such.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 44 (view)
 
school first or relationship first?
Posted: 11/18/2009 10:26:32 AM
having given up school to get married and start a family....now finding myself almost 15 years later happily divorced but going back to school...I'd say always put school first...long term relationships need the kind of foundation a good education and the right career path for you provide intrinsically.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 818 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/18/2009 10:10:48 AM

I would not be on a thread crying the blues about the situation my irresponsible behaviour landed me in


Isn't that exactly what child support from a man who never wanted to be a father is??? Your body...your choice....your responsibility.

No this this issue isn't about blame...even if that's what you're focused on. It IS about the power women currently hold over men in the parenting department, and this disparity starts from the moment of conception and never stops. You don't want to admit that such a disparity is by definition a human rights violation...because any man who doesn't want to be a father is evil in your eyes. I simply do not agree...and I am a father...who WANTS more kids no less...so I have no vested interest except the agenda I've mentioned here. I want the same rights as the mother of my child has from the moment we conceive and she decides whether or not to carry it to term.

"Right back at you" is a very convenient way of dodging my point. Both sexes have the choice to have sex in any form...protected or otherwise...but the choice to be a parent lies squarely with the female of the species and therefore should be her responsibility alone should that be the situation. Sorry...but that's what equality and responsibility are really about.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Oh, its to soon to have sex... yah, blah, blah, blaw
Posted: 11/18/2009 9:53:43 AM
you know not to boast or anything...but I don't remember the last time I heard that from a woman...
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 814 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/18/2009 9:48:02 AM

Can one of the men on this thread please explain to me why the idea of using birth control is so abhorrent to them


Nobody is saying that. Stop saying it yourself. I agree that men should wear condoms and take necessary precautions. But this issue isn't about who's fault it is that she's pregnant, it's about the fact that men lose all of their rights once she is. That's a serious human rights violation if you asked me. Asking men to be responsible for children they did not choose to have carried to term is the same as asking the same woman to abort because he doesn't want to be involved.

I don't care if you ladies don't like it, I don't care if raising a baby alone is hard, I AM a parent and because of that I know I would choose to have that baby if I were in your shoes and wouldn't be lying in the hospital bed with my hand out looking for support for my decision to be a parent. I know that if I got a woman preganat and she carried to term that I would be totally involved...

of course...if she doesn't want me involved she has that right too...

but hey...I should just keep it in my pants instead of expecting equal rights in the 21st century
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 805 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/18/2009 8:59:37 AM

Instead of asking men to carry part of the responsiblity of the decisions that they ultimately made with they're bodies, it's to tell women to get an abortion.


That's not true. Women as we know have all the power here and nobody is saying get an abortion or else, Miss Limbaugh. You're twisting words. It's about telling women that having the choice to deliver a baby or abort it is a big deal...but it IS their deal. Regardless of who they had sex with...if they can (and again...they CAN) decide over him whether or not he MUST be a parent in the emotional or financial sense is just as bad as him forcing her to abort...so why should this continue???


Your penis, your choice to have sex, your sperm created a baby. Your responsibility. That's logic.


Not if I can't get pregnant or choose to be a parent it isn't...
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Current girlfriend keep insisting on meeting my ex...Drama Drama Drama!!!
Posted: 11/18/2009 8:47:36 AM
unless there's at least a whiff of a chance that these two women will get it on with you... or at least for you...then absoloutely do not introduce them.

Be firm about it regardless of the outcome.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
I am breaking up with BF Today! Had ENOUGH
Posted: 11/18/2009 8:45:58 AM
some people are into being controlled...they just haven't admitted it to themselves yet...and worse...haven't found the kind of partner yet who gets that and can "play" to that need once in a while...but is ultimately well intenioned.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 802 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/18/2009 8:31:03 AM

Bottom line, if men are afraid that sex is gonna saddle them with a financial responsibility for a child, then they can either do without sex, submit themselves to a sterilization procedure, or have sex in some way that there is no risk of pregnancy....


...and right here is where the root of the problem lies. This clearly illustrates a commonly held notion that men are lesser beings in this area. Instead of asking women to carry the full burden of responsibility of the decisions that THEY ultimately make with THEIR bodies, it's tell the men to keep it in their pants.

As hard as it might be to have some woman decide to abort a fetus I helped create and would honestly raise on my own after birth...I accept that it IS her body and her choice to deliver or not. So...why is it so hard for you women to accept the responsibility that comes with that kind of decision??? Your body, your choice...your responsibility. Period. That's logic...that's reason in the very literal sense of the word...but here we are still debating the issue...
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 411 (view)
 
Liberal vs conserative
Posted: 11/17/2009 5:43:50 PM
15 other major economic powers? It amazes me how you simplify complex problems.

Let me ask you something, of those 15 powers, how many of them have an illegal immigration problem that is even HALF of the United States?

Know why labor was outsourced? Because american workers were no longer satisfied to earn that low of a wage. Who told them this? Hmmmmz the unions perhaps? How many of those .09 cent an hour jobs would be fit for americans. When the cost of products go up to account for american labor, it's just the greedy corporations again padding their profits right?

Last i checked mexican's weren't STREEEAMING into norway to pursue the "norwegian" dream.


See that's one of the human nature factors that capitalism is notoriously susceptible to. Having that many people in such relatively close proximity to each other, with that kind of disparity economically means that the poor eventually take what they need. You can't really blame then can you? I mean if a person is driven and passionate enough about a better career to cross the US-Mexican border, then surely they deserve the chance to have it right? Isn't that what capitalism utltimately says...survival of the fittest???
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 746 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/17/2009 3:08:13 PM
30 pages...and we men are supposed to believe that there's no issue here...right.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 547 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/15/2009 12:28:49 PM
There's a lot of stuff being thrown back and forth here but if you accept that Women DO in fact have the whole my body my choice on their side, they really should accept the responsibility and consequences of that kind of power...yet they're reluctant.

Contraception is a mutual responsibility...enough with that.

The issue here lies with the power women have once they decide to KEEP a pregnancy to term...everything is on her terms...
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 337 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/12/2009 3:29:26 PM
You can talk and talk...ad nauseum...


actually it's ad nauseam...

The fix is easy actually. If a woman becomes pregnant and chooses to carry to term, (soley her choice to make) and the biological father is in agreement about wanting the child in the first place...then they MUST both share EQUALLY all rights AND responsibilities from the moment of birth. I'd prefer sooner...like if the father wishes her to not smoke etc during a known pregnancy that should be adhered to...but I know that the moment of birth seems to be the standard accepted time when others have rights over the child...not perfect but a definite grey area that is a virtual minefield in terms of the law...

If she does not wish to keep the child after giving birth, the father should have first right of refusal instead of just placing the child in state care...If the father does not wish to be involved because he never intended to father a child in a world where women have the sole choice to give birth in the first place then he should be exempt from any responsibility OR rights to the child.

Easy peezy lemon squeazy. Everyone is responsible for their own decisions and the consequences, which is how it should be right???

As it is now...men can be denied access to a child they are forced to provide financial support for...with no legitimate reason other than mother's wishes. that is wrong.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 327 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/12/2009 2:53:26 PM

The laws themselves have to change and right now the laws are as good as they can be in our free choice, free speech country.


I absoloutely rebuke this statement. The laws are not as good as they can be and it's time women ponied up the extra power they have in the parenting department so that things are truely 50/50.

Divorced father is the new black.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 325 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/12/2009 2:38:33 PM
am I the only one here who's still talking about the O.P.'s point???

Sure men can wear condoms...say no thanks to sex...but the issue in this discussion is whether there are women abusing the reproductive power they hold now and have always held...

...except of course in Muslim countries where while Sharia law isn't perfect, it certainly protects men far better than western law.

We men are tired of being told..."my body alone means it's my choice alone...but not my responsibility alone..." and worse " good luck seeing your kid ever again".
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 149 (view)
 
Should I Be Able to Accept My Husband Smoking Pot?
Posted: 11/12/2009 2:28:53 PM
another thread about the evil weed.

Ok...to the O.P. while I do not agree with your views on Pot, I can understand that if your hubby gave it up to be married to you, it is unfair of him to expect you to just accept it.

Except that those marriage vows tend to go something like 'for better or worse etc..." which means that while you may feel you have and are entitled to the moral high ground here, you're breaking your vows the same as he is by saying that you will not accept him for better or worse...only the way you want him. Again, I see where you're coming from if you're one of those "pot is the devil" types, but you're no more ritcheous here than he is.

He doesn't need "help" as Pot is NOT a drug in even the sense that sugar or caffeine are drugs..., is NOT physically addictive and aside from making you hungry, horny and then sleepy, is really quite enjoyable and harmless.

So...my advice is first and foremost, go learn about pot. Learn about why most of the western world has decriminalized it, even embraced it for it's many benefits, and most importantly, why the DEA (lobbied by corporations with vested interests in lumber and paper) and certain right wing types have been at war with a simple, non processed, otherwise non harmful plant than millions use every day with little to no ill effects.

I don't know if you're a drinker of alcohol, but the poster of message 128 is correct in his suggestion that pot is far FAR less harmful than many things you currently have in your kitchen cupboards...like sugar...or worse...artificial sweetners...McDonalds etc...

Whether you smoke it or not, it's time people made INFORMED decisions on what they pontificate about. The propaganda machine needs to be stopped unless you prefer being treated like cattle...
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 322 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 11/12/2009 2:15:12 PM
whether they are or not isn't nearly as important as the fact that they have nature and the law on their side regardless. This MUST change as nobody deserves that much power over something as innocent as a child and their father.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 342 (view)
 
Strong opinions on pot smoking here and abouts; why?
Posted: 11/12/2009 9:12:36 AM

It's illegal
-It support organized crime
-It corrupts the youth


- Not everywhere that has put real thought into the issue...most progressive countries have at least decriminalized it on some level...it's just the right wing states of the Union that still have their heads...well...you know where. The real important question is WHY do these backward parts of the world still fight the majority...it's about lumber...go look it up.

- It does support crime. Make it legal and tax it and you've killed two birds with one stoner.

- I rebuke the whole it corrupts youth argument as that's subjective reasoning. Most pot smokers I know...cancel that...all of them...of varying ages have more going for them than most squares based on insight alone...but hey...go have another glass of wine to feel sophisticated while you get a buzz on...and then realize that you're putting far worse poison than pot into you by doing so.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 82 (view)
 
Do you ever think about how much time you have left?
Posted: 11/10/2009 2:08:32 PM
I'm a man...so I'm lucky enough to have far more time than most women to find love.

Sorry ladies...
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 374 (view)
 
Liberal vs conserative
Posted: 11/10/2009 2:07:32 PM

Liberals have
1.The White House
2The house of representatives
3. The senate
4.Canada
5. Most of Europe


I was going to correct you on Canada as we actually have a Conservative Minority government...but really, because we do have more liberal type faction parties (NDP being the third main party made up of mostly moderate liberals) we are actually in what could be considered a Liberal-ish majority run by the conservative minority.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 247 (view)
 
Why some men never want marry?
Posted: 11/10/2009 11:40:34 AM
as much as I want more children, under the current tyrranical family court system, I have no plans to marry ever again.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 85 (view)
 
Male Butt
Posted: 11/10/2009 11:39:05 AM
I have a smallish, muscular caboose that I keep trimmed but not shaved. Women seem to love it enough that all they want for dinner is my tossed salad!!!

yes...I am a very lucky man.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 129 (view)
 
Casual blowjobs
Posted: 11/10/2009 11:35:57 AM
in my experience, casual blow jobs...the kind where she actually finishes what she starts instead of just using it as 3 minutes of foreplay to get you hard come only from girlfriends. Wives...not so much.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 326 (view)
 
Love,Quality of life and who pays
Posted: 11/10/2009 11:31:18 AM
Men AND women value toys. For men it's cars, motorcycles and big tv's...for women it seems to be shoes and a big, full, well organized walk in closet.

It is a known fact that women are biologically programmed to seek out the male with the most resources and social status to offer...it is also a known fact that society re-inforces these biological compulsions....and to be fair...it is a fact that men seek out young, pretty females who are most likely to bear healthy children. We're just like our ape cousins...go check for yourself...again...countless studies by countless scientists from numerous disciplines.

I feel that what we need to do to evolve as a species, especially in light of the new mating norms in the west, is to get past these natural and societal pressures.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 173 (view)
 
how come women initiate the breakup 80% of the time?
Posted: 11/10/2009 11:24:46 AM
Actually, they are facts, and i didn't say 80% I said 60+ % of women intiate the divorce. Like I said to the naysayers like you...instead of arguing the facts (google them...I'm not doing it for you just so you can selectively edit what I and others say and twist words)...the facts exist. There are multiple studies...go educate yourself and try to offer something constructive for a change. Your response is the very definition of rhetoric...but being the smart girl I know you to be I'm sure you're well aware of these statistics and just don't like the light in which they paint these women.

I'm not here to villify those women, I like many other men here just want some answers...instead of attacks and the other nonsense you and others offer ad nauseam.

Seriously...quit bogging down these conversations with this b.s.!!!
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 169 (view)
 
how come women initiate the breakup 80% of the time?
Posted: 11/10/2009 10:48:40 AM
Do women? I'm not sure about that. I think men go through mid life crisis & male menopause and have a thing about getting old, and have a big ego and when a younger woman looks at them.... wow.... they pop! Its not all women....


Within the context of marriage and divorce, the statistics DO state that women DO initiate a divorce over 60% of the time and rarely cite abuse as a reason.

It stands to reason, though it is a bit of a leap, that the same can be said of non marital relationships as well.

So instead of arguing the facts which are clear in this case, how about some of you women come clean and just tell us why? Is it that you really don't know??? Are you afraid of incriminating yourselves in some way...painting yourselves in some negative light???

Address the facts or move on to another thread already...the rheteoric for rheteorics sake is a clear defense mechanism.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 197 (view)
 
If you found out he used an escort
Posted: 11/10/2009 10:37:51 AM

I dont' want to offend anyone, but doesn't paying for sex sound pretty cheap? And how many times did he do it? Do you really want that kind of man who has to pay for it? You have to ask the question why? Would he still do this if he was with you? It must give him some kind of querky pleasure (as well as the physical) to go out and pay for this escort.... must be more behind it. I would definitely think of it as a deal breaker.


I don't have to pay for sex but the first thing i did after my separation was to go treat myself to a threesome. And sorry ladies, you may not like hearing it but I know you know it to be true...men always pay for sex whether from a professional or an amateur...get over yourselves....
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 80 (view)
 
Texting while on a date
Posted: 11/10/2009 10:29:18 AM
the only time I would accept any kind of electronic communication on a date would be if it came from my kids mom...anything else is just disrespectful.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 104 (view)
 
Confused & upset - Why do men do this?
Posted: 11/10/2009 10:28:13 AM
To the OP. I used to spend a lot of time conversing with women here before meeting them...and i've since learned that this is the worst mistake to make. It allows far too many unreasonable expectations to build and as we can see from your post, sometimes we forget to manage our own expectations.

Now, I simply chat online once or twice and ask to meet, if they aren't into that, then they don't understand that relationships FIRST and FOREMOST require that initial spark...chemistry...whatever you'd like to call it to really be successful. Qualifying a potential mate with all that chatter is old school salesmanship btw....and we all just love old school sales men don't we???
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 133 (view)
 
Whats with the harems?
Posted: 11/10/2009 10:22:05 AM
unfortunately, this is not a behaviour that is soley a male thing. Women get so many emails, so much attention here that I know they do it just as much as men do...maybe even more.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 309 (view)
 
Love,Quality of life and who pays
Posted: 11/9/2009 4:22:52 PM
I don't quite understand your response but the fact is that if most of the major banks in the US and around the world can file for bankruptcy, then nothing is safe. As for defining success, put it this way, we all know Michael Jordan for his success on the basketball court, but even his airness misses a free throw now and then.

Face it ladies, if all you're after is a good lifestyle provided by a so called "successful" man, the statistics suggest that you will eventually be dissapointed...which means your view of him will change and you'll be gone in a heartbeat. Just like he's gonna bail once your beauty success fades...it's karma and it's a ****.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 195 (view)
 
If you found out he used an escort
Posted: 11/9/2009 4:17:31 PM
you ain't a man if you haven't paid for it at least once in your life. Big deal, it's just sex. Be more concerned about how he treats women in general as opposed to any moral quicksand.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 65 (view)
 
Guys, how long can you do this??
Posted: 11/9/2009 12:26:08 PM
for me I equate sex with the purest form of intimacy...not love or emotional attachment. Sex often means more to women based on what I believe is their nature and what society forces on them. I can definitely have sex for months with a woman without any lingering feelings of attachement. Again...I think that has to do with the male nature and societies' pressures.
 wannashakeyourtree
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 307 (view)
 
Love,Quality of life and who pays
Posted: 11/9/2009 12:17:26 PM
success has nothing to do with his OR her livelihood.

While I've tried to make this statement gender neutral, I think it's well documented here and elsewhere that many many more women than men view a successful livelihood as a top 5 "want". To be honest, that's fine because as we've learned from social and political science, the vast majority of people are sheep and easily led or impressed. It's why religion does so well and the economy relies so heavily on that "don't ask, don't tell, doesn't affect me anyway" middle class way of thinking.

See, I've had the benefit of success in business. I've reaped the rewards of being treated like a rock star by women clamouring to get my attention the moment the learned about my success. I've had steak dinners whenver I wanted, drank the finest wines and smoked fine cigars. Nowadays, now that I'm embarking on a new education and career, those same women want absoloutely nothing to do with me...ok fair enough. I take solace in the fact that aside from being clearly superficial to a fault, those women are likely to end up with men that will eventually use that financial success to control or manipulate their woman. They're also far more likely to cheat simply based on oppourtunity (again...think rockstar vs. groupie here for a second) and also likely as shallow and superficial as their women. So, what does that so called ideal, successful man do when you turn 40???? He pays for you to get so much plastic surgery that not only do you not look human, you're repulsive to him AND to the men you'll be trying to land after he runs off with the 23 year old nanny.

Oh and ladies, success in business can be very fleeting. You gonna stick around when his company goes ta ta's up and he files for chapter 11??? Not likely. Is that love then???? I think we all know the answer. But at least you got what you WANTED for the short time you did.

For me, success is about enlightenment, about knowledge and wisdom. It's about having a social conscience and making a difference on this planet and to my son. It's about realizing that there is so much more to life than putting on appearances and all that fake nonsense. It also means that now that I've made that realization, I'm going to wait to find a woman who shares similar values and beliefs, the kind of woman who stands by her man like her man stands by her. That my friends is love, that is what solid marriages are based on. That's who you grow old with...not some crazy looking broad in her 50's with her face pulled so tight that Micheal Jackson says "damn girl, you look freaky".

Good luck with that you gold diggers because we all know the gold rush ends eventually, but love lasts.
 
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