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Posted: 11/18/2009 5:05:22 PM As always...if she is hot=ok. If she isnt=creepy  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 15 (view)   Is looks that important to woman, or am i imagining things. Posted: 11/18/2009 1:49:19 PM It seems like a lot of ladies will settle on looks as they get older, yes.... I see it all of the time with the guys that a lot end up marrying vs. the guys they chased in high school. But then again, I guess the ones that dont "lower their standards" end up divorced or sitting around waiting.... It doesnt take a rocket scientist to figure that 80% of the people cant end up with 20% of the higher quality stock...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 9 (view)   Why ask a woman for her number? Posted: 11/17/2009 6:15:49 PM If he is single and halfway desirable, he should be able to get several numbers a week and pick and choose...welcome to the wonderful world of music chairs...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 60 (view)   You're 'not ready for a relationship'? What does that mean? Posted: 11/17/2009 3:01:08 PM ^^^Telling somebody that THEY arent ready for a relationship isnt something you say to somebody else If you dont think the person is ready, move on and let them be....  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 16 (view)   Question about women and alpha-males Posted: 11/17/2009 11:34:10 AM Yeah, it makes all of the average looking/fugly guys feel better about their situation to think all of the guys that have more going for themselves and getting all of the attention are really the "losers" If only all of the ugly people in the world were actually so nice.....  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 2 (view)   Body for Life Posted: 11/17/2009 7:59:10 AM That sounds like a good routine and have been doing something similar (at least the 3 HIIT sessions a week) and concentrating on strength training and lost several inches off of my waist this late summer/early fall.  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 5 (view)   What exactly does no Games and no Drama mean? Posted: 11/16/2009 1:23:34 PM ^^^^ding ding ding...Its kinda the like attracts like thing....do you really think somebody that is high quality and can pick and choose is going to listen to "drama"....  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 10 (view)   Should I check him out? Will you? Posted: 11/16/2009 5:21:10 AM He isnt interested....move on...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 17 (view)   Cheating is unacceptable behavior but if your honest about it should it scar you for life? Posted: 11/16/2009 4:28:47 AM "So how crazy would it be for a girl with a good heart, good intentions who made a terrible mistake to tell her next the complete truth about why her last relationship failed?" You are 23 and already divorced....so most guys should figure things out quickly enough...no doubt you will probably make the same mistakes over and over for awhile....also, notice how you had to make a long explanation to explain the guy was a jerk when you stepped out with another guy  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 15 (view)   What should you say when a girl tells you she's fat? Posted: 11/15/2009 6:37:59 PM Sounds like a question you ask the "gay friend"  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 3246 (view)   GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage? Posted: 11/15/2009 3:58:38 PM Probably not....it is too easy to hide disinterest in sex that way....  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 4 (view)   Some Diet Tips For You People Posted: 11/15/2009 5:51:17 AM And dont forget your steroids..."you people"...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 16 (view)   what do MEN WHO ARE LEADERS find attractive in a woman? Posted: 11/15/2009 5:46:37 AM "So.. this is a question for men who would consider themselves leaders in life. What type of women do you pursue and why?" Somebody that has common sense and can contribute...having it "your way" with a strong guy isnt going to last long if defers to you and things end up poorly  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 14 (view)   People over 30 that are not taken - something wrong with them? Posted: 11/14/2009 7:26:12 PM "We never know anyones story until we ask." That is true and I know there are a FEW that fall through the cracks....but otherwise, good luck with that.....A lot of people have delusional ideas of why they are divorced or never married and it is an ongoing "red flag" topic in these forums...My theory is it is a coping mechanism....few want to admit the real problem or they arent able to recognize it...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 27 (view)   Having multiple partners just because one is bisexual... Kind of weird but.. Posted: 11/14/2009 4:38:21 PM If you NEEDED 2 RELATIONSHIPS.....it would mean to me: being gay and pretending with a mate that is of the opposite sex and having a homosexual relationship.... v.s. being "bisexual"  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 9 (view)   Why do guys chase after girls that are not available? Posted: 11/14/2009 8:05:01 AM Some have already mentioned it...but YOU are making yourself approachable....probably flirting and more...if you dont want it...YOU can stop it And funny that I have known lots of ladies that switched boyfriends to something better and werent really serious even willing to fool around....  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 17 (view)   He has a dysfunction and she has the hots for other men. Posted: 11/12/2009 5:55:28 PM He's stalling for whatever reason.....My guess it is something more than E.D...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 4 (view)   Tell him how I feel or shut my pie hole? Posted: 11/11/2009 5:43:48 PM Sounds like you already told him what you felt...He doesnt see you as a long-term option for a relationship and he has said it....you getting close to him hoping he will change his mind probably wont happen while you just get teased...why dont you find somebody that will reciprocate and stop spending time with this guy...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 17 (view)   Do i move on and settle for 2nd best? Posted: 11/11/2009 8:11:37 AM Long distance relationships are a fantasy....why dont just find somebody near you...you are young and good looking enough  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 7 (view)   what's REALLY his deal? he won't have sex with me after 2 yrs Posted: 11/10/2009 6:36:52 PM Probably gay....wont be the first to keep a straight relationship going for appearances...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 11 (view)   Nice guys vs. Players. How do I tell the difference? Posted: 11/10/2009 8:17:40 AM "nice guy"=limited appeal and you will complain that you arent attracted to him. "player"=has more appeal than you but will take some sex since he is somewhat attracted.  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 11 (view)   What Makes You Want More Than Sex From A Woman -? Posted: 11/9/2009 10:01:06 AM Frankly, I think a lot of those threads where the gal complains about being used for sex seems like there is one consistency....the gal fantasizes about what they have to offer....as if anybody is going to want a long-term relationship with somebody that doesnt have as much to offer as they do...if it is looks, stage of life, and values...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 16 (view)   Heavier Americans Push Back on Health Debate Posted: 11/9/2009 9:17:22 AM "I have heard more excuses from people about why they are overweight. What it boils down to most of the time is dicipline. I was in an accident, gained weight being on crutches for a year. If I can drop 55 pounds in a couple months by following a strict diet, ANYONE can." You gotta love these threads where people that have put on 50-100 pounds rail on everyone else's excuses for weight gain... Seriously, the obesity "crisis" is an entirely different issue from health care reform....if anything, more access to education and mental health screenings could do more good to the problem....the costs of letting people get to the point of needing more expensive care for the sake of the call of "people taking responsibility" is just dumb....We all end up paying more in the long run no matter how much you want to think you are isolated from cost shifting. And to the older guy that is close to 65 and will be on medicare....if you want to rail on fat people, there is a larger, more expensive group that I would rather throw to the wolves....the elderly  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 10 (view)   interested or not? Posted: 11/8/2009 5:45:08 PM "I understand that he must have learned something about me that he didn't like, or possibly even met someone he liked more, but can't a guy politely bow out with an explanation?" The few times that I have used online dating, just about every time there was something fishy with the person (posting old pictures or recently divorced) that was behind them being flaky....so I dont see any reason to take it personally  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 95 (view)   Dating and finding positive people over 40 Posted: 11/8/2009 3:26:07 PM It's the age old problem...people that are positive and have a lot going for them are in long-term relationships or least in high demand  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 9 (view)   how to meet people in new city? Posted: 11/8/2009 11:56:52 AM I would avoid the bars.... I have had some nice conversations with people standing in line at the bank and even giving blood is a good one....anytime where people have to sit and wait and have nothing else better to do  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 9 (view)   getting to know a guy in class Posted: 11/8/2009 11:51:14 AM "I am kind of shy too but I would really like to get to know him..any suggestions of asking him to hang out without scaring him away or would he possibly pursue me if interested? how should I get the ball rolling to atleast become friends? thanks!" If he was interested, he probably would be checking you out, making eye contact, saying something to you, flirting, etc....  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 4 (view)   How do you let a guy know you are interested? Posted: 11/7/2009 7:42:13 PM Yeah, if you have gone out multiple times, it is a safe assumption that he knows your are interested...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 11 (view)   23 year old women without children, and I'm weird? Posted: 11/7/2009 11:10:24 AM "Do other men think like this?" No...I would guess the response is for a reason....I can see a lot of female profiles for example and guess from the pictures that the lady has kids, smokes, and is probably not educated....sounds harsh but the responses you are getting are probably along those lines....Like a bit surprised... Believe me, guys are not usually excited that you have kids, either...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 15 (view)   the guy who hangs back Posted: 11/6/2009 7:15:58 PM "i'd rather not be another fly buzzing around the flower, if you know what i mean. i like to think i'm better than that." Think whatever you want if makes you feel better....But let me guess....somebody with average looks sitting back acting disinterested looking to pickup chicks at a bar with an attitude that he is too good....sounds reasonable  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 85 (view)   IS IT TRUE THAT A WOMAN SHOULDN’T PURSUE A MAN? Posted: 11/6/2009 12:05:37 PM "Showing interest - letting someone know you have interest and then stepping back and allowing them to respond (or not)." What she said...nobody likes to be hounded by somebody that you have no interest in....  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 3 (view)   Are guys intimidated by independence? Posted: 11/5/2009 6:18:53 PM ....do a thread search on "intimidated"....no guys are not intimidated by BBWs, independent, etc. Your profile is a HUGE RED flag....considering your introduction is a rant about not needing a man.... My take is this talk is code for being disrespectful and bossy towards a guy....both genders need to feel appreciated and needed to some extent....(not needy)....  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 15 (view)   A question about personality Posted: 11/5/2009 6:08:05 PM It has to do with finding compatible personalities...I dont like being the one that has to entertain all of the time or being completely responsible for the conversation.... You also have to be aware that not all guys are going to chase you like the guy above said about the bar with the more outgoing, yet less attractive ladies getting more attention....  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 15 (view)   My question is why? Posted: 11/5/2009 2:34:42 PM "long term" with anybody on POF...I dont think so..."Friends" is the only way to go so you can graciously exit at the coffee meet when she shows up 100 pounds overweight...  buns of veal Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 4 (view)   Asking out a cosmetologist? Posted: 11/5/2009 2:20:33 PM How about when she says something kinda outrageous....ask "what would your boyfriend say" Seriously, if she really was that interested maybe should would have dropped a few suggestions beyond just being friendly...  paradigm shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 28 (view)   Second chances? Posted: 11/4/2009 6:00:21 AM Yeah, I had a female friend that broke up with her future husband, also.... I broke up with 2 girlfriends twice....and probably would date the one again if the circumstances were rightI think a lot of it is the time and place in your life.  paradigm shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 16 (view)   Why would a guy lead you on for years Posted: 11/4/2009 5:41:26 AM "In point of fact, a guy who is singing how much he loves you for four years without moving forward is a red flag" Probably any amount of time is a red flag....I frankly wonder why so many people stay with somebody that isnt following their words with actions...  paradigm Shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 15 (view)   The infamous Friend Zone - men vs women? Posted: 11/3/2009 4:21:50 PM The reason the guys complain more is the "nice guy" syndrome front and center These weasels are trying to be friends and go out of their way to gain favor....  paradigm Shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 43 (view)   So he/she USED to be Gay/Lesbian! Would you still date them? Posted: 11/3/2009 3:51:17 PM I would be infuriated... My take is the guy is hiding being gay so that he can have the disguise as a married man....Let me guess....a religious type  paradigm Shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 6 (view)   Deafness Posted: 11/3/2009 1:07:10 PM Better to tell people stuff earlier and no I dont think it is a big deal if he is into you otherwise....  paradigm Shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 14 (view)   Is being a comedian now a requirement for dating? Posted: 11/2/2009 7:10:04 PM Yes....havent you read a lot of the profiles....The ladies "love to laugh"  paradigm Shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 13 (view)   Weight Loss Posted: 11/2/2009 6:17:35 PM "Do you think that posting my website would be a good thing... or will people just think... (and some do in life) that it is only temporary." This has been brought up before and some will not see it as a positive.....People will probably assume it is temporary because everyone sees a fair number of people go up and down....  paradigm Shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 15 (view)   Why The Girl I'm Seeing Won't Add Me On Facebook Posted: 11/2/2009 5:08:57 PM If things are going well otherwise, I wouldnt have requested it x2 and let her add you if she wants to...My guess is she doesnt see it going anywhere and doesnt want the drama of deleting you  paradigm shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 19 (view)   Single women with ring on wedding finger Posted: 11/2/2009 9:21:09 AM "Personally, I would have given the title of the book but not have engaged in further conversation." Good for you...although, I think the entire "unapproachable" attitude is just something to avoid...  paradigm shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 11 (view)   Single women with ring on wedding finger Posted: 11/2/2009 5:43:06 AM ^^^^....Let me guess she was really hot wasnt she  paradigm Shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 10 (view)   OK guys.. what's up with that?? Posted: 11/1/2009 6:09:58 PM I got a question for YOU, op....why are there so many gals with just a head shot listed as "Average" for body type  paradigm Shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 4 (view)   Looking for opinions and input: No children a requirement? Posted: 11/1/2009 4:41:08 PM "Wouldn't that be a good indicator that this father is capable of rearing a child if the relationship grew to that point with you?" What would this prove if you are not with/no longer with the mother?..Seriously, I think you can learn a lot from what kind of parent somebody is but my experience is that it can be just as much a negative...including unruly and obese kids, etc.  paradigm Shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 16 (view)   Why do men have to see you before trying to get to know you? Posted: 10/31/2009 9:07:26 AM Why? because people are not honest about themselves... I have NO INTENTION of spending time "getting to know" somebody that is tricking me when they are 50-100 pounds overweight and/or putting up old pictures....Online dating is notorious for this...  paradigm Shifted Joined: 5/21/2008 Msg: 14 (view)   Do men read the ads? Posted: 10/30/2009 8:15:36 PM ^^^^yeah right....now she is single....   Show ALL Forums